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42 Up (1998)
- I'm going to work in Woolworths.
- When I grow up, I want to be an astronaut. - When I get married, I'd like to have two children. - My heart's desire is to see my Daddy. - I don't want to answer that. - This is no ordinary outing at the zoo, it's a very special occasion. We've brought these children together for the very first time. They're like any other children except that they come from startlingly different backgrounds. - Stop it at once. - We've brought these children together because we wanted a glimpse of England in the year 2000. The shop steward and the executive of the year 2000 are now seven years old. - In 1964, World in Action made Seven Up. We have been back to film these children every seven years. They are now 42. - Is it important to fight? Yes. - Tony was brought up in the East of London. - I wanna be a jockey when I grow up, yeah, I wanna be a jockey when I grow up. - At 14, he was already an apprentice at Tommy Gosling's racing stables in Epsom. At 15, he left school. - This is a photo finish of when I rode at Newbury. I'm the one with the white cap. I was beaten a length and a half a third and had a photo finish. So, I took it out of the box and kept it as a souvenir. - It's only an eight. - By 28, he'd given up on horse racing. - My greatest fulfilment in life, when I rode at Kempton in the same race as Lester Piggott. I was a naive wet-behind-the-ears apprentice. All my years from seven, all my ambition is fulfilled in one moment and I eventually finished last. Tailed off obviously, but didn't make any difference to me. Just to be part of it, be with the man himself. - What will you do if you don't make it as a jockey? - I don't know, if I knew I couldn't be one, I'd get out the game. Wouldn't bother. - What do you think you would do then? - Learn taxis. - At 21, he was on the Knowledge, and by 28, he owned his own cab. - We were on the way to Langans, and all I can hear is Alf Garnet, you know, and it's the Labour Government and your lot up here. - Have you got a girlfriend? - No. - Would you like to have a girlfriend? - No. You understand the Four Fs, find 'em, feed 'em, and forget 'em. The other F, I'll let you use your own discrimination. I mean, this one, I tried to do the three Fs, but I couldn't forget her. - I went to a discotheque. He was in the pub earlier on and that afterwards, we went to a discotheque and Tony was down there, and I just, from there I just, that was it. I couldn't get rid of him. - We have our ups and downs, no more than anyone else. - I think you got to work at a marriage. I think all marriages go through stages, you can't stand each other, you go through, you know, I think, "Oh God, I hate him I wish he'd get out." I do. - We've been to the edge of the cliff and looked over a couple of times, and we've always seemed to sort of go back, and we've sort of stayed the course, but I must say it's not easy being married. Anyone who thinks it is, I mean, it's quite difficult. - In 1993, Tony and Debbie left the East End and moved to Woodford in Essex. - Well, with the help of my neighbour, I'm not really a do-it-yourself type of guy. He painted all the back of the house, and we were gonna put a conservatory here. If you look along here, we've put a patio in and a pond for the fish. - Well, when we bought it, it was very old. This was two rooms and we've knocked it completely out. Refitted a kitchen, put all new windows in, new flooring, literally everything really. Well, the fence we had a bit of luck there 'cause the next-door neighbour, they paid for it and they'd done all this end. So I'd done, come in my favour having a small bit done. So, there's a blessing there, but the only thing I ever done was I planted them three trees, and they seem to have grown in the last three or four years. - It has cost us a lot of money to do it, yeah, a lot of money. Now, we're skint. - Well, I think we overspent about, oh, a colossal amount, thousands. My overheads to keep everything going here is at this present time astronomical. - Are you gonna get out of this financial hole? - Yes, without question because that is this is a millstone around my neck at this time, but it's nothing what two years won't achieve through hard work and determination. - To help out, Debbie works the day shift in the cab, while Tony does the night shift. - Son, it's hard work out there. - You're not reaching me yet. - Not getting to you. - No, you're not getting to me, all right? Now, be bigger, dominate me, all right? - Son! - At 28, Tony was taking acting lessons. Now, he supplements his income with TV jobs. - Oi! - That's all I've got on me. - Mate, if I had a pound for every time I've heard that, I'd be a rich man. - Got the fare, haven't you? - Yeah, just about. - Would everybody please sit round now and get on with their work. I don't want to see any backs to me. Shouldn't be anybody turning around. Tony, do you hear as well? Get on with your work in front. Tony. Don't turn around again. - There's only one ambition really. I want a baby son and if I see my baby son, then I'll see my ambition fulfilled. No one knows that, only you now. This is Hackney Marshes and the games are being played. Mostly these are pub sides, and I've been playing over here for near 28, 30 years. - So, you're a veteran. - You might call me that, yeah. - Who do you play with? - My Nicky and I think it's quite admirable that his dad's in the same side as his son. - Tony and Debbie have three children. The eldest, Nicky works as a French polisher. - I wanted him to go on the Knowledge and become a cabbie. I bought him a bike. But I'm quite proud of the way he's turned out. I mean, he's a very respectable kid. Very respectful towards people and most of all, he's done it all on his own terms. - Perry, she's just started secondary school. She's a character, but she's quite academic minded, and hopefully, you know, she'll stay on. - Hey Ref, come, yeah! - Come on, let's get on with it now! - Another one. - We got another 16 minutes left. Let's go! - There you go, straight there, to your left. - Jodi don't like school. She's just coming up to now that she'll be leaving school shortly. I do feel that she's wasted a lot of years in her secondary school. I'm not saying that it's the school's fault. - Well, come on. - Probably a lot of it is her own fault, but you know, and we have tried with her, and we have tried to push her into it. She's just, I think she's a bit how Tony was. She's just not interested in school, which I feel she'll regret later on. - Lovely. I mean, I try to discipline them in various areas, but at the end of the day, it is quite hard and difficult. I like to stand up and suggest, you know, lead with an iron fist, but I haven't got the heart to do it, and that's the truth in the matter. - I have to do it. And then if anything goes wrong, it's my fault. - A bird said to me the other day, she said, "Ain't you small?" So, I said, "But you're ugly, at least I can grow." And then I said, what can they say to that, they can't say nothing, can they? - And why did you fall in love with him? - Don't know. - I don't know how you've put up with me for so long. - I don't know. Sometimes, I don't know how I stand him. - I've been in positions, you know, oh, it's hard to say in front of Debbie, but it's true. It's tempting. You take the bait. I go on holiday once a year with the boys, to have a fling in to Spain, Magaluf, and we have a golf holiday, all against Debbie's will, but it's true, and I get in situations out there that, you know, life is for living. And I come back, "Oh, I know what you've been doing out there. "You've been meeting all them birds and whatever," and they look at ya as if to say, "I know, but I don't want to know." That's how it is. I have often not gone through life with one hand tied behind my back and my character, happy-go-lucky nature, and I've been in positions, and I've found myself caught in trouble. I'm not proud at all to say this, but the situations arise that I've had regretful behaviour at various times but. - You got caught and that was it. - You know, I'm not lying about the fact. I mean, you can always cover it up and suggest other things, but it's, you know, true and let it be true. - You caught him? - Yeah. - What happened? - Well, you know, it was touch and go whether we carried on from it or not. You know, we sort of went through a very traumatic time. - Then again, let who's never sinned cast the first stone. I mean, it just doesn't happen with a taxi driver living in Essex. It happens with MPs, et cetera, et cetera. I mean, you know, I'm not gonna hide behind any trees and suggest, you know, I am holier than thou, which no doubt, I'm not. All I am suggesting is that this is what real life is all about. If I've been caught with my hand in the till, that's fair enough, I'll pay the consequences. And the consequences is, iron out the details and the problem with my wife and my marriage and hopefully eventually get it in the right lane and put it back on the tracks. You know, it's... - Why did you forgive him? - Because at the time, I felt that there was still something in the relationship, you know, and there was three children involved here as well, which is not easy when you've got three young children, and there was obviously still something between me and Tony, and it's not easy to walk away. I could have walked away. I felt, it's silly, but when it happened, I felt very strong and I could have walked away. It's not been easy to try again, to get over it, the hurt, 'cause I've never done it, and I've never been unfaithful, and that's what I've found really hurtful, and I feel that I'm a good wife and I didn't deserve it. - All I understand is dogs, prices, girls, Knowledge, roads, streets, squares, and Mum and Dad in love. That's all I understand, that's all I want to understand. - Tell me about the family. Are you fairly closely knit? - I love them all. There's not one that I don't love more than another, other than my mum obviously. But your mum is the root of the tree, you love your mum best. - By the time he was 34, both Tony's parents had died. - I'm at the graveside, I'm talking to her, you know, of all things. I've got all images running through my mind saying like, "Tony, go downstairs, get me five weights, "you know, one and a penny," and I used to go in the shop, she used to throw the cotton in a hair curler over the landing and I used to tie the cigarettes on this bit of cotton and she used to pull 'em up, and you'd see her in the end, "Thanks, Tone see you after school, be good," and that's the way it was. Even now, I get emotionally sentimental over my mum and dad. It's just because I feel, the weekends they could have had over here in the later part of the life. It would have been nice to know that their last days were with me type of thing, but it wasn't to be. The poshies, "Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes," they're nuts. Just have to touch 'em. I don't want to change because if I change, it proves the other Tony Walker was all fake. You know, I'm not trying to keep up with the Jones' and make myself any more than what I know I'm capable of doing. But I mean, I can only go so far, I'm only a cabbie. I mean, I'm not exactly a movie star, but I've done as well as I can go, and I think this is about the limitations for me now. So, I'm happy with what I've got. If anything else comes along, it's a bonus. - Tell me, do you have any boyfriends, Suzi? - Yes. - Tell me about him. - Well, he lives up in Scotland and he's, I think he's 13, and I'm rather lonely up there because he usually goes to school, but we used to play till about half past six when he comes home from school, then we go in and then he goes home to do his homework. - Have you got any boyfriends, Suzi? What is your attitude towards marriage for yourself? - Well, I don't know, I haven't given it a lot of thought 'cause I'm very, very cynical about it. But then, you know, you get a certain amount of faith restored in it when, I mean, I've got friends and their parents are happily married, and so it does put faith back into you. But me myself, I'm very cynical about it. - When I last saw you at 21, you were nervous, you were chain smoking, you were uptight, and now you seem happy. What's happened to you over these last seven years? - I suppose, Rupert. I'll give you some credit. - I'm now chain smoking. - I think you can't just walk through a marriage and think once you get married, it's all gonna be roses and everything forever. You know, you have, well everybody has their rows, but it's, we've never yet had a row that we haven't managed to sort out. It's very hard to actually say what it is that goes on between a couple. It's either there or it's not, and maybe we're very lucky. I mean, after 20 years, we still seem to have it. When I get married, I'd like to have two children. I'm not very children minded at the moment. I don't know if I ever will be. - What do you think about them? - Well, I don't like babies. - What was the biggest shocks to you when you suddenly were confronted with a small baby that you had to be responsible for? - Panic set in, I think, that I wasn't going to be able to cope. - At 28, Suzi had two sons, Thomas and Oliver. - I mean, I don't think I'll have any more for the reason that I will get pleasure out of these two, but I can't see me going on and on and on. - By 35, she had a daughter, Laura. - I don't want to. - Very little has changed. My life is probably very much the same as it was then. I've had another baby, we've moved house and that's about all. - Would you like having a nanny to look after them, or do you want to look after them? - No, I want a nanny to look after them. I've chosen to stay home for the last 15 years to bring up my children because I wanted to be the one that did it. Tom is now 16 and he's his own man really now. He's suddenly got confidence in himself now and having been a very, quite a shy child, he's now come out of himself and he's his own person. Oliver's very individual, it's a sort of love/hate relationship Oliver and I have. We don't get on all the time, but we still come through most things. But it's been a hard battle for him. He's got learning difficulties and life hasn't dealt too many easy cards for him, and so it's a lot harder for him. - C-O-N-T. - Laura just seems to take life in her stride. I mean, she just takes it. I'll give an easy one, always. - A-L-W-A... - And she's very easy going and gets on with life. Equal. - E-Q-U. - Tom will be away at university whatever in another couple of years, and they'll all get on and make their own lives. That's all. The mid-40s is a crossroads for people 'cause their lives do change, and I don't want to just suddenly find when the children have gone, I've got nothing to my life, I'm not very good at sitting around doing nothing. I have to be doing something, I have to have a goal or something to try and achieve. - The more she went through the stages of bereavement, the bigger the space became, but the actual grief... - Doesn't go away. - Doesn't actually go away ever, but just. - I got into bereavement counselling about four years ago. - Interestingly enough. - It can be very harrowing, it's very difficult, which is why all counsellors need a supervisor because you come out sometimes from a session mentally and emotionally drained. - 'Cause she was coming more to terms with what happened. - It's an extraordinary experience when you meet someone who is suffering terribly, and over the months, you see them move on. You see them get their life back together again. - At 28, Suzi's father died. - It is terribly hard, and even now, I still can't believe my father's not here. It's still sinking in, I think. My mother had been ill before, but when I started the course, I didn't know quite how ill she was then, and then we'd found out she had fairly terminal cancer when I was halfway through the course. And I did wonder whether I could carry on 'cause it was quite difficult going to the course every week and listening to other people, what they had gone through, but in a strange way, it helped me. - You know as well as I do that if you've got a complicated bereavement. - So, I came through the course, and my mother died just after that, but I did find it a help doing it 'cause I'd just felt I wasn't alone. And I think that's the whole point of bereavement counselling, is that people feel very alone when they've lost someone very close to them, and a lot of people don't have someone to turn to. Well, with any child going through their parents splitting up aged 14, you're at a very vulnerable age and it does cut you up, but you know, you get over it. I never had a very close relationship with my parents. I didn't really know them very well, but in the last few years of her life, we had become closer and I think that's what I resent, that I lost here when I did because I was just beginning to really build a relationship with her. - When he was 34, Rupert made a big career move. - I was a partner in quite a big law firm, and I resigned from that and set up my own company. I tend to specialise in refurbishing old buildings and converting them into offices. - It was a very difficult time when Rupert was deciding to leave. He's got a lot of responsibilities with all of us, and it's not easy just starting off on your own. - Do you ever worry that the roof might fall in and you'll be out of this? - Yes, I mean it crosses my mind, and this last year, it's quite, you know, it's crossed my mind quite hard that we might, you know, we could lose this. - I've never, ever wanted to have a business which was dependent on losing your house, but I think ultimately that can always happen. - The gamble paid off and the company's doing well. What sort of things do you do? - Ride, swim, play tennis, ping-pong. I might play croquet, things like that. I did have a privileged background, but on the other hand, I was sent away to boarding school very young, which I find very hard to cope with, and I'm sure my parents did it for what they felt was the right reason. I just felt rejected, which is why I never wanted to force that onto my children. - What do you want most out of life? - To be happy and get on with life. I mean, I don't want to just sit back and let it all whiz past. You don't know how long you've got your life for. You could be run over by a bus tomorrow, so you've got to make the most of it while you've got it. If I could have it over again, I would change, I would change my life from 14 to 21. Those years were not good for me. Like any other child with divorced parents at 14, I felt very lost, bewildered. I would have made more of my education instead of rather throwing it away because I just thought I knew it all and didn't want to be bothered. But I can't turn the clock back, so I just have to bury that and think, "Well okay, "it was a time in my life that was unhappy," and move on. - Two of the boys are coming into that period of their lives. Are you watchful of that for them? - I am watchful of that, but I hope they have a more stable home life than I had at that age, and I don't take for granted the home life that Rupert and I have tried to build for them. All I want is to be here long enough, to be fit and healthy long enough, to see my children grow up to be independent people. What I really couldn't cope with was if I died before they were grown up. It's the one thing I think every parent dreads is not living long enough to see their children into adulthood. Excellent! - What do you think about rich people? - Well, not much. - Tell me about them. - Well, they think they can do everything without you doing it as well. - Symon was brought up in a children's home, the only child of a single parent. - Rich people, they have all different things. They have everything they want, whereas poor people, they don't have nothing and they know they haven't got nothing. And so, they know they're missing something. - What are they missing? - Well, I'm missing a bike and a fishing rod. 20 years ago, when I was born, you know an illegitimate child, that's something that's only whispered about, people felt strongly about it in those days, but nowadays, it's not a serious matter. The serious point is whether you stay with somebody or you leave them. Since 21, I've got married, had a couple of kids. Well, I don't think there's anybody else I could have ever married expect Yvonne. She's my life really because we're together, we have the children and everything. - When did you decide to have the five, did you want to have them close together. - Yeah because if you separate your kids, you see one's 15, and one is six, and there's such an age gap that they could never get on. They never grow up together, they won't know each other. - By 35, Symon and Yvonne were divorced. At 42, he had married Viennetta. - We used to go out when we were younger. We met in a launderette. - Once a week. - Once a week at the launderette, and we just sort of drifted apart and... - Unfortunately. - And had our own lives, got married, and we met up again six years ago, nearly six years ago. And then we're gonna go to the... - She already had a teenage daughter, Miriam. Now Symon and Viennetta have a four-year-old son, Daniel. Does he remind you of yourself when you were younger? - Oh no, he's got far more energy than me even. - He's a bit of both of us actually. He's very bright and very quick. Very clever. - I like to know how things work, so, for that, yes, he is like me. - Why did you call him Daniel? - Oh, long story. - It was my father's name, yeah. - That's nice. - We decided to name him Daniel before he was born, didn't know it was a boy. - They say, "Where's your father then," you know, "When your mum's out at work, they say, "your father." And I just tell them I ain't got one. - What effect has that had on you? - Well, I don't think it's had any effect on me 'cause what you don't have you don't miss. I mean, it hurts me that he wasn't there, but at the same time, he wasn't there. He wasn't there for me, he wasn't there for my mum, so I never really wanted to see him. That's anger inside me but personally, I'd like to see him, just for curiosity's sake, but the anger that I've had for how many years is, it's been overgrown by boredom now, I just can't be bothered to look for him. Well, they've got everything. They've even got what I never had, so. - Which is what? - A father, innit? So I mean, they've had everything. I've still got five children. I mean, they haven't really taken the break-up of my first marriage too well. I've got still to get to grips with that and get to them and make them understand that Daddy is still Daddy. - Has that been hard? - It has for me because I've always been the retiring type, the, you know, not really taking anything on, but I don't really want to lose my children, any of them. I still want them to know that I am there for them. At that time, I thought maybe the two families could meet and everything would be all right, but we're not talking about a movie, we're talking about life, so things don't always work out that way. - It would be nice if they can just pop over and say, "Hello," and come in freely like as if they were one of the kids 'cause other kids do, so why shouldn't they? - Well, before I'm old and that, enough to get a job, I just walk around and see what I can find. I was going to be a film star, but now I'm gonna be an electrical engineer. Which is more to reality really. - By 21, Symon was working in the freezer room of Walls Sausages in London. How do you see the future as far as work goes? - Well, I know I can't stay at Walls forever. I mean, it's just not for me. I couldn't stay there for that long, my mind would go dead. I think if I really wanted to, I could learn a trade even now. No, I'm quite happy to stay there. It doesn't look like it's gonna close down, so I mean, better the devil you know, innit? - Walls did close down and Symon had a number of warehouse jobs before he joined Yusen, an airfreight company, as a fork-life truck driver. - I mean, when I was young, I used to say, "Oh, I'd never work in an office, "all those stuffy people in a stuffy office," but I've done enough hard work to realise that I've been doing the wrong job for so long now. - And the brother has big eyes. - And he's blue. - Yeah. - The brother is blue. - Not last year, the year before, Symon went to do GCSE Maths, same thing as my daughter, and they're both swotting here, and Symon comes up with good grades and he passed, but he, you know, it's just given him a kick up the bum to get something in that field 'cause he's very good. - I'd one dream when all the world was on top of me and everything was, and I just about got out and everything flew up in the air, and it all landed on my head. - So, are you still drawing and painting? - I like to but I never really find time to actually sit down and set something out to do. It's just that this is so good, she sort of stands back and. - Yeah, exactly. - He does help Miriam though. She's doing art at A Level, so when she has difficulties in something, she says, "Symon!" So, he comes to the rescue at times. - I get it from my mum 'cause she loved art. Always dragging me round the galleries and whatever. - Was it difficult moving from the home back to live with your mother? - Well, I find it's comfortable. See, I can get on well with my mother sometimes. Well, that's good because a lot of young children can't get on with their parents at all at this time of their life, but I get on pretty well with my mum now. - What sort of life does your mother have? - Well, it seems hard. I means, she's always been nervous. She has periods of depression. It's made me very sort of protective towards her. I feel I've got to help her all the time. She died in 1990, she had cancer, and she didn't survive all the stuff they was doing to her. - Was that tough? - Yeah, for me because there were so many things I never actually said to my mum that I would have liked to say to her. It's just things you think about afterwards. It's too late because they're not there anymore. - What sort of things? - You know, just I love you every day, and I like what you're doing, or I don't like what you're doing. Just ordinary silly things, you know? Everybody's got to get used to knowing coloured people and coloured people in turn have got to get used to being with white people. 'Cause if either side doesn't work properly, then no side'll work properly. They're just the same as me, aren't they? - Do you think it's hard being a black man in English society today? - It depends what you want, dunnit? If you just want to live in the society, no it's not hard. If you want to fight the society, yes, it will be hard. To be honest, Michael, I have never actually taken it on. I've had it from both sides to be honest, to be fair to meself. I've had white say, you're black this and that. And I've had black people telling me, you're white this and that. So, I stopped thinking about colour a long time ago. - But it's still as tough out there. You're still fighting, and you're still having to push yourself. 'Cause when you've got a job, you've always got to try and work harder. Even at school, you've got to, they seemed to stereotype you. Even when we moved in here, we had no one speak to us because they expect you to be having loud music and parties and that, but we're not all the same, you know? You've got good and bad in every nation, and you know, we're just the same as anyone else as far as I am concerned. - Just wanna be like everyone else really. Nothing too marvellous. I feel okay, just getting on with me life, just sort of keeping up, but I know if I really wanted to, I could get on. It would only take a little spark in me to do it. - What's the biggest influence Viennetta has on you? - I think really motivation because before I never really pushed myself. She looks after me. She doesn't just push me, she looks after me, you know? She will never let anything be wrong for me. She always makes sure that if I go down the road, I look all right. If I go anywhere, I look all right, you know, and I do the right thing, and it makes me feel that there's somebody out there that really, really wants me. - I read the Financial Times. - I read the Observer and the Times. - What do you like about it, John? - Well, I like, I usually look at the headlines and then read about them, about it. - What's the point of the programme? - The point of the programme is to reach a comparison. I don't think it is. We're not necessarily typical examples. - And I think that's what people seeing the programme might think. - Yes. - Falsely. - They tend to typecast us. - So, everything we say, they'll think, "Oh, that's a typical result of the public school system." - Yeah. That's one of the problems with this sort of programme, I don't really think that for people like us, unless one speaks at seven and have been very funny, have very much to say that's very interesting. 'Cause I mean, we don't know very much. - Well, we didn't know every much when we were seven, but at least we were quite funny. - We were at least funny. - Yes, I agree with John. All we can do is say what we think, and if that's of interest to people, good luck to them. - I'm going to Charterhouse and after that to Trinity Hall, Cambridge. - Andrew went to Charterhouse and Cambridge where he read Law. - I'd like to be a solicitor and also fairly successful. - At 28, Andrew was a solicitor. What qualities do you think it needs to be successful? - Well, you have to have a legal ability in my business obviously, and you have to have a sort of bedside manner as far as your clients are concerned. It's no good being brilliant if you can't communicate with your clients. - By 35, he had become a partner. - Well, I work in the corporate department of a large firm of solicitors in the city, that is, dealing with things like mergers and acquisitions, joint ventures, general corporate advice, putting deals together for clients. I suppose the pace has changed a bit. As you know with technology, people expect the work done much faster than they perhaps did, well perhaps not so much seven years ago, but 14 years ago. Our practise has got much more international with more business travel. We have offices in places like Sao Paulo in Brazil, Moscow, Thailand. - How has that changed your life or your part in the company? - Well, it really means that you are under increasing pressure to produce things quickly. - And how is that for you? - That's fine, you have to meet the pressures, that's what people come and see you for. - What do you think about girlfriends at your age? Tell me what you think of girlfriends? - I've got one but I don't think much of her. They're no longer just bores who won't play this or something. - They're part of the community, and they're there. - And you can begin to talk to them. - I don't think I financially come from the same background. Andrew didn't go for the haughty deb, he went for a good Yorkshire lass, but I mean obviously he knew what he wanted. - By the time he was 28, Andrew had married Jane. - I think I'm probably quite down to earth, and I tend to be less extravagant than maybe some women are. I don't go out and buy lots of expensive dresses. I just go out and buy one or two. - And even better, pay for them. - I suppose the most important thing that's happened is that we've had two children, one five years ago, Alexander, and then a couple of years later, Timothy. When I see the children playing together now, I realise how much fun they have together, and it's probably what I missed perhaps being an only child. - What's the most difficult thing about keeping the marriage together? - I don't think it is particularly difficult actually. We seem to manage all right. Would you say? - I think so, we talk, don't we? We have a situation where we retain a babysitter once a week and we make a point of, if at all possible, that once a week, we always go out by ourselves mid-week. And I think that's quite important. - Do you worry at all about not having a career, and what will happen, as I said, when the children leave home? - Well I do, but I've made that decision now, and I've come to terms with it. You know, if I'd wanted to be a career woman, then probably that's what I'd be, but I didn't want to be a career woman. I wanted to be a mother and to be a full-time mother. - You get a very good view of the Statue of Liberty now. - Uh-huh, can you see it? - It's our children's half-term, so we decided to spend a few days in New York. - You go and have a look, Tim. - I come here from time to time on my work, but it's usually very rushed. But we thought it would be rather nice to bring them with us. - Smile. - I think it's not a bad idea to pay for schools because if we didn't, schools would be so nasty and crowded. - Yes. - So do I think so. - Yes. - And the people in the schools. - And the poor people would come rushing in. - The man in charge of the school would get very angry because... - And he'd get bankrupt once more. - He wouldn't be able to pay all the masters if he didn't get any money. - An education is very important. I mean, you can never be sure of leaving your children any worldly goods, but at least you can be sure that once you've given them a good education, that's something that no one can take away. Well, Alexander is coming up into his teens, and he'll be sitting common entrance to go to his next school later in the year, which will be a boarding school. In fact, he's down to go to the same school as I went to. Timothy is continuing where he is now for a while and perhaps be going through the same procedure. Well, I think boarding makes you feel self-sufficient and also, it teaches you to be away from your parents and to live with people for a long time. - It's going to seem very, very strange, but if it's what he wants to do and if it helps him to get where he wants to go, then I'm prepared to only see him every three weeks. - Once I had to talk to Greville, he was in my house and I asked Sir if he could put him out of my house because he was always getting minuses. It think it's become much more competitive for children nowadays. I don't really remember much about my early childhood, but I feel that they are under more pressure to perform now. You know, you look back at us at the age of seven, saying we're going to this school, that university and so on. But there have been many places where one could have gone wrong. Just because you have the opportunities, it doesn't mean that you necessarily are gonna pull through. - Where might you have gone wrong do you think? - Well, one could have given up on university, one could have found the pressures of work too much. One could have found the pressures of marriage too much, all sorts of things can go wrong. - And what is it in you do you think that's pulled you through? - Well, I suppose it's just being persistent. I don't like giving up, and perhaps it's also not being too adventurous, not wanting to do anything else, once you start, you know. I've been in my job for 20 years. I haven't really wanted to do anything else. - When I leave this school, I'm going to Collett Court, and then I will be going to Westminster Boarding School if I pass the exam. And then we think I'm going to Cambridge in Trinity Hall. - And then it just presents itself. - Half, three. - John went to Westminster School. He went on to read Law at Christchurch, Oxford. - I do believe parents have a right to educate their children as they think fit, and I think someone who works on the assembly line in some of these car factories earning huge wage could well afford to send their children to private school if they wanted to. - At 21, we asked him what career he would pursue. - Might be at the Bar. - Doing what? - Perhaps Chancery practise. - I now have a career, I'm a barrister. Other than that, life chugs along in varying degrees. When boys go around with girls, they don't pay attention to what they're doing. Yes, my grandmother had an accident because a boyfriend was kissing his girlfriend in the street. - John married Claire, the daughter of a former ambassador to Bulgaria. He has a very successful career at the Bar is now a QC. He decided not to take part in this film. - When I leave school, I'm going to the Dragon School, I might and Mummy's, and I might go to, after, I might go to Charterhouse Marlborough. I can't remember all other the places because Mummy's got so many, but there's some of them. - What about university, Charles? - I might go to Oxford. - Charles went to Marlborough, but he didn't go to Oxford. - In fact. - Instead he went to Durham University. - I'd say I'm pleased I didn't because it's very much a sort of set from Marlborough Prep School, Marlborough Oxbridge conveyor belt. Shoved out at the end. - And what did Charles want to do? - Hard to say, probably scribbling away in some basement for some London newspaper or something. - Charles did scribble away for an East London newspaper. He then moved onto the BBC where he became a producer. He's now Editor of Science Documentaries at Channel 4. He decided not to take part in this documentary. - When I grow up, I'd like to find out all about the moon and all that. - Nick, a farmer's son, grew up in the Yorkshire Dales. - I said I was interested in physics and chemistry. Well, I'm not gonna do that here. - At 14, he was at away at boarding school, and at 21, reading physics at Oxford. So, what career are you gonna pursue? - It depends whether I'll be good enough to do what I want to really do. I would like if I can to do research. The gas in these experiments is at a temperature comparable with that of the sun, whereas in a power reactor, it would be maybe 10 times the temperature of the sun, and we're trying to induce that gas to fuse. - By 28, he had moved to America and was doing research into nuclear fusion at the University of Wisconsin. By 35, he was an associate professor there. - The first one is basically saying that the rate of change of crystal momentum, it's DDT at this quality H bar K. That is equal to the Laurent's Force. So, if you work out the density in any cell. In addition to now being a full professor, I've been doing some administrative jobs. I've been associate chair of my department, which means I've run the graduate programme in my department, which is the Electrical Engineering department. I've been running admissions and dealing with student problems and some for the graduate programme. And I've spent the last year and a half writing a couple of books. One about this business of using plasmas to process semi-conductors, and there is another one that was about semi-conductors. It's called "Semi-conductor Devises," and it's got a subtitle, "A Simulation Approach." - Do you have a girlfriend? - I don't want to answer that. I don't answer those kind of questions. I thought that one would come up because when I was, when I was going on the other one, somebody said, "What do you think about girls," and I said, "I don't answer questions like that." Is that the reason you're asking it? Yeah, I thought so. The best answer would be to say that I don't answer questions like that, but you know, it's what I said when I was seven, and it's still the most sensible, but I mean, what about them? - Nick was only 17 when I first met him, and I knew he was a nice person. I find him very attractive and he uses his intelligence in his relationship with me which is very important. - His English-born wife Jackie is a professor of journalism at the university. They have an eight-year-old son. - Why only one child? - Well, there's a couple of reasons, one is that these silly jobs we have demand such an amount of time and such a commitment that it's hard to fit in one. Also, he's such a lively person and he demands such a lot of attention that he makes it hard to find time for another. So, I think that's the main reason. - So, you don't want another one? - Oh yes, no, I would love to. I would dearly love to have another one actually. No that's, don't go away with that impression. No, I absolutely adore children. If I can change the world, I'd change it into a diamond. I don't really think that I've done anything you could call a great success. I mean, it would seem really ridiculous to any of my friends who watch this if I said, "Christ, aren't I a great success, look at me." - When I first met you, I remember I thought this was very idealistic, but it was rather interesting, when I asked you why are you working on fusion, you said you wanted to save the world. I think that's a bit embarrassing now, but I don't think you'd feel the same way about something that you didn't feel mattered. - I always wanted to have an impact, to do something useful that was actually going to benefit people. I had this vision of people in ivory towers being cut off, doing stuff all their lives and having no effect on anybody whatsoever, and that was absolutely not what I wanted to do, and so I chose to go into this fusion business 'cause I thought this would have a huge impact. - Plasma's supposed to fill that volume. - I'm not expecting to be reported in newspaper headlines any time soon. That's not the limit of my ambition, but it's just trying to be realistic. I'm just gonna have to try and settle for reasonably small victories. They'd like to come out for a holiday in the country when we'd like, when I'd like to have a holiday in the town. - Do you get lonely here? - You just tend to get stuck into your everyday routine, and you don't think about it, but when you call home, then you realise how far away you are, and now it seems acute because both our families are getting older, even if you think in terms of seeing them once every two years. - That's not so many times. - You're thinking only about 10 times and that's awful. - This year, Nick went back to the Dales to see his family. It's been five years since I've been back here. It's changed quite a lot. It's got more touristy and less like a region that's farmed. Every second house seems to be a hotel at the moment. - This is the old pippin. - Well, it's been rotten for my dad because he's been unable to walk a lot of the time. He'd had terrible troubles with his legs, and of course, farming's in a miserable shape, so he's retiring, and the stock have been sold. Yes, I think he'd had a very hard life. He's had to work enormous hours every day of his life doing something that ultimately isn't going to work. - Do you want to take up farming? - No. I'm not interested in it. My youngest brother, the deaf one, if he can't do anything else, he can probably run the farm if he can't, as a last resort. - So, your brothers won't take over on the farm? - Absolutely not, no. Neither of them really wanted to, I don't think. Andrew's a newspaper reporter. He's I think about to take a job near York. He's gonna need a base over there. He can't commute from here. Well, Christopher's married, which is great. He has a very nice wife who is getting better and better at communicating with the deaf and he works in Skipton. He's taking some courses in computers. I'm not actually sure what, but he always says to me that I do computers and I think that it's a good idea that he does computers and I do. So, I try to encourage him. - So, you're all away, so the Hitchons are finished here? - Yes, the Hitchons are certainly largely uprooted from here, aren't they? I'm the only child in the village except for my baby brother. Well, this is Arncliffe School, which is where my brother and I went to school from age five to 10. And there's the church where we were all christened and everything. We used to go to harvest festivals and things there. - What did you learn here do you think that you carried with you? - Well, you just look at this place. I mean, it's utterly beautiful but not beautiful in the pretty cutesy way. I think of it as being magnificent but rather grim really. I sort of feel as if you could look deep inside me, I feel like there's some of this in there somewhere, and it's rather dower but just wonderful. It's very uncompromising, and sometimes it's rather tragic, but it makes other places you go seem rather trivial as well. I'm just enormously proud of having come from here. The people are, the idea of being a Dales person is really terribly important to me. What you see that's so magnificent are the clouds sweeping by all the time, air and cloud and water continually sweeping over you. I mean, there's a poetic side to that, and I would be looking at these and thinking, "Now, how does a cloud work?" And when you come down to it, what I do when I try to solve equations, it's the same equations that describe clouds and water and air flowing around. From a scientific point of view, I relate back to this sort of thing. - So, this is a sign, there's ESAs, there's LFAs. - It's hard being away from your roots, isn't it? - Terribly hard. It's hard in lots and lots of ways. I mean, if you go to an alien culture, you don't know what's going on around you half the time. It's really strange to go to a different country, people don't send out the same signals. I could try that. - Even if it's frightening. - It's very hard to imagine being able to come back here, and I think about it a lot, but I haven't seen the way to do it yet. In some sense, it never really belonged to me. I mean, part of me would love to own a stake in it, but I really don't own any of it. But the other thing is that I've had to move out of here, and I think that the way the world is, it's very hard to stay in one place. People are forced to move constantly. The history of this century has a lot of examples where people moved or should have moved and professionally and in lots of other ways, it's really important that people are always thinking about what's happening around them and how they have to react to it. Beauty's transient, so maybe we can come by here and visit it, but unfortunately, I'm not gonna be permitted to be here very much. - And what about all the other children? What's happened to them? - Well, I'll go in to Africa and try and teach people who are not civilised to be more or less good. - I'm going to work in Woolworths. - What would you do if you'd lots of money, about maybe two pounds? - I would buy meself a new nice house, wouldn't I? - What does university mean? - When I grow up, I want to be an astronaut, but if I can't be an astronaut, I think I'll be a coach driver. Well, I'm going to take people to the country and sometimes take them to the seaside. - Is Neil still homeless? We'll find out tomorrow. - I wanna be a jockey when I grow up. Yeah, I wanna be a jockey when I grow up. - Last night, we followed the fortunes of some of the Seven Up children. - I must say, I mean, it's not easy being married. - When I get married, I'd like to have two children. I don't want to just suddenly find when the children have gone, I've got nothing to my life. - Tell me, do you have any girlfriends? - Well, not many. - What do you think about girls. - Well, not much. I don't really want to lose my children, any of them. - If I could change the world, I'd change it into a diamond. - Since I wasn't gonna be a farmer, I couldn't live here anymore. Choosing to leave here is like having your right arm ripped off. - Tonight, we'll see what's happened to the rest. - My heart's desire is to see my daddy. - I'm going to work in Woolworths. - What does university mean? - When I grow up, I want to be an astronaut. - This is no ordinary outing at the zoo, it's a very special occasion. We've brought these children together for the very first time. They're like any other children, expect that they come from startlingly different backgrounds. - Stop it at once. - We've brought these children together because we wanted a glimpse of England in the year 2000. The shop steward and the executive of the year 2000 are now seven years old. - In 1964, World in Action made Seven Up. We have been back to film these children every seven years. They are now 42. - Yes, speak up. - We'll march it both ways! - When he was seven, Bruce was at a pre-preparatory boarding school. At 14, St. Paul's in London. - They don't sort of enforce being upper class and things like that at St. Paul's, you know? They suggest that you don't have long hair, and they do get it cut, and they teach you to be reasonably well-mannered but not to sniff on the poorer people. - There is a property. - At 21, he was in his last year at Oxford reading maths. - And by Eisenstein. You can show that this is irreducible, then you do a transformation on this polynomial, x equal to t plus two. - Good, that's a nice way of doing it, particularly using Eisenstein down here. His test is very powerful. - Yes. Well, there is one job, I'd like to make maps really. I mean, it's a nice sort outdoor life and you go to, I mean, you travel around, but there are very few jobs like that going. You observe that seven, which is a prime, divides the co-efficient of t squared. I won't carry on with mathematics. I don't think I'll be a teacher And seven square doesn't. So, you're in the lead, you see because TSE caps got put to two pounds and could be caps, no problem at all, okay? Now, can you explain that just to Abdul 'cause I want him to understand what it is. - Yes, sir. - At 28, he was teaching, immigrant children East London. - Abdul, times. I was working in an insurance company at the time, and I decided to go into teaching without any experience at all, and I didn't think they would allow somebody to walk in off the street into a classroom. Well, I'll go into Africa and try and teach people who are not civilised to be more or less good. - So, is this your missionary dream come true? - Well, not exactly. I've had the opportunity to come here for a term, and it just so happens the school I'm in has great links with this part of the world. - At 35, Bruce was teaching in Sylhet in Northern Bangladesh. - And then I've also got the chance to learn a bit of Bangla which is very difficult and I'm not doing very well at. - Bangladesh, Bangladesh, Bangladesh. - Bangladesh. - Bangladesh. - Bangladesh. - The straight line, yes, keep going, keep going, keep going. Right, yeah, till you hit, no, no, that's it, stop there, yeah. - At 42, Bruce is again teaching in the East End of London. - And then having positive points, what do you do now? - Turn 'em up. - Turn 'em up, okay. This is Bishop Chancellor Roman Catholic Girls' School in the East End of London. It's about 1,000 girls 11 to 18. I'll be over in a minute. And I've been here about five years. I'll just leave that for a couple of minutes. Well done, Malik, if you want to sit down anyway, thanks. It was a chance to go for promotion to be Head of the Maths faculty and to teach A level as well. Okay, all right. I didn't agree with the conservatives about what they were doing with the black people, you know, the racial policy. I'm an optimist here. I think we can show the way, if you like, for developing a sort of more harmonious multicultural society. Next thing we've got to do is copy that table down. Well, petrol. I'm quite pleased in a way that I know, say an Algerian fellow near where I live, he will say that in other countries in Europe, they're spat at and harassed and beaten up by the police. Here he says, "I walk down the street and nobody minds." Well my, girlfriend is in Africa and I won't, I don't think I'll have another chance to seeing her again. - Have you got any girlfriends? - No, no, not yet. I'm sure it will come, but not yet. I mean, I do think a lot of people think too much about it. I think I would very much like to become involved in a family like my own family for a start. That's a need that I feel I ought to fulfil and would like to fulfil and would do it well. Yes, I haven't got married or whatever, and I suppose that would've been something which I hoped would happen. You know, I suppose lots of reasons really, I don't suppose I've met the right person. - Well, you're getting on a bit. Are you getting worried? - Well, not particularly, I mean, I'm always optimistic. I mean, who knows who I might meet tomorrow, but I think that's the trouble with reserve. You're not rejected, but you never know what might have been. But I'm getting better. What does that look like? - It was when I think we were doing the school production of Annie, and Bruce was playing President Roosevelt, and I had to put on his stage makeup. Not many men will let you put on their makeup. - It gives me great pleasure to be here on this joyful and happy occasion to celebrate the marriage of Bruce and Penelope. When Christ shall come - Bruce and Penny married last summer. She teaches at Bruce's school. And take me home - I, Bruce Swain. - I, Bruce Swain. - Take you, Penelope Sarah Jane. - To be my wife. - So, how did he propose to you? - We were on the sofa and in the middle of a conversation about something completely different. He just asked if I'd like to marry him, and if I hadn't been listening carefully, I would have missed it completely. - To love and to cherish. - To love and to cherish. - Till death us do part. - Till death us do part. It was quite unusual really. We did a lot of it ourselves and we had the reception here. We didn't have a lot of things that you normally have at weddings like the cars and photographers and all that sort of thing. Everybody say, "Cover work!" We just planned what we wanted, and it all worked out very well in the end. It was a very enjoyable day. In practical ways, I'm better fed, better looked after, thanks to Bruce, generally better organised than I was before. He's very good at sort of financial organisation and running bank accounts and being sensible, that kind of thing, than I am. - First when we got married, one of the odd things was this, her mother said, "Oh good, "there's someone to look after Penny and cook her meals," rather than the other way round which sometimes happens. - What was the biggest shock about being married? - Well, I think three bags of clothes getting chucked out. Two of which didn't even make it to Oxfam. Is that right dear? - Yes. - But I suppose some of them were crusty old flares, I don't know, perhaps they deserved to get chucked out. - Does he think that the discovery of gold was a good thing for the Transvaal? - She's very determined and doesn't let things go, especially with school. She wants everything to be well done. I mean, she prepares lessons way into the future. - A lot of the monopolies were granted to Dutch. - She's very sensitive, responsive, and helps me act in a better way. I might become petulant or something, and it's somehow not appropriate in that situation. My heart's desire is to see my daddy who is 6,000 miles away. - For march that good ways! - I can remember being happy there. I can remember also being miserable because I can remember crying. - Squad, steady! - You know, I always seemed to be beaten, and I never used to understand why. - Squad, ho! - People possibly say I'm a little innocent at times or naive. I used to get worried about this and think perhaps I ought not to be taken in or deceived. I'm not talking about love now, I'm just talking about generally speaking. I think I do have a sort of greater level of confidence, especially in expressing myself, in holding opinions. I think if you're having a partnership with somebody, that definitely makes you more mature in a way because you're not thinking about yourself all the time, you're thinking about somebody else. - Extend the line here, and then after nought hours, you can see that it would 60 litres. - What ambitions do you have now? - I may become a senior teacher at some point here, but I don't really have aspirations to become a deputy head and a head teacher. - Why? - You do tend to move out of the classroom at that stage, and also, you have to go on courses in MA and educational studies and so on, and our lives are busy enough really. No, I'm in sort of a middle-aged mode at the moment where middle-aged content is the best description. - Go on, Carter. Do it! - Do it good, Carter, I am sure. - Who's going to? - How are you doing, dear? - Fine, thank you, dear. - If you saw me running around the cricket field now after a ball, it's just comical. It's just a lumbering old man, you know? No flowing swoop and hurling in at the ball. It's all gone, that lightness, that youth. It's just gone. - Not so fast. - I think so, yeah. I don't know whether they're gonna move any of them. - We may have children, I don't know. If in seven years' time or so, we're living in a slightly bigger house with a young family, that would be nice. I mean, I don't want to pin all my hopes on it and nothing happens. We are quite old. I can see bringing up, say, teenage children in your 40s might be a bit strange. - Looking back on your life, halfway through say, I mean, what regrets do you have? - Now, I'm married to a lovely person. That kind of takes out some regrets that may have been or I've missed my chance there or something, and you never know what the future will hold for you, and I think I'm lucky to have found Penny. - He's the nicest person I've ever met. He's just somebody you could rely on the whole time. - Oh, I might quote that some time. - Yeah. No, he's not the kind of man you would ever actually have any doubts about. - I don't like the big boys hitting us and the prefects sending us out for nothing. - When he was seven, Paul was in care at a children's home in London. Were you happy at the children's home in England? - We didn't mind that really 'cause we didn't know what was going on 'cause we were a bit young. Well, as far as I know, my mother and father got, well they separated originally, I think. They eventually got divorced. I went to the boarding school for one year and then we emigrated to Australia. My father got remarried. - Paul settled with his father and stepmother in a suburb of Melbourne. What mark has it left on you, the fact that you were brought up within a bad marriage? - The only thing I can say that I think might have come from that is just my lack of confidence and being able to show my feelings really, I suppose. - Would you like to get married Paul? - No. - Tell me why not. - I don't want like 'em, say you had a wife, they say you had to eat what they cooked you, and say I don't like greens, well I don't, and say she said, "You have to eat what you give." So, I don't like greens, say she gives me greens and that's it. I know I prefer to be alone really. I can't say I don't want to get married 'cause I think I do. But I want to be happily married, you know, and therefore, I want to make sure, I think. - What was it that you feel in love with, what is it about him? - His helplessness, I suppose. It was the motherly instinct in me to pick him up and cuddle him. He's also very good looking, I think, but he doesn't agree with me. In the summer, he's got this cute little bum in shorts. I mean, I can tell quite a few stories here, but the one that really irritates me the most is when we have an argument, he says, "That's it, leave me." And I say, "Fine, all right, I will one day." - So, how's married life been since I last saw you? - Shocking, shocking. - We had our 20th wedding anniversary this last, just before Christmas. - Which is a life sentence. - Yeah, everyone reckons that we should be out of jail by now. - By the time they were 28, Paul and Sue had two children, Katy and Robert. - Picked up a centre field, right where it's driven. - When we was 35, he brought his family to London for a holiday to show them where he had started out. - When we had Katy, when she was born, Paul said to me, "Oh, I'm glad I've got a daughter." He said, "When I'm an old man, "at least she'll be able to come up "and she'll be able to give me a kiss and a cuddle". - And she was also the shy one of the two, which had probably followed after me a bit. - Well, Katie loves to shop. We are starting to learn more of what we share alike 'cause she's very much like Paul, and she doesn't quite know what she really wants to do just yet. I really love painting and art, and I love music and she really has taken to that, and she seems to have the creative flair. - What does university mean? I'm pretty happy with Katy. I'm not having a go at Robert, but I've got fears for Robert 'cause he's struggling a little bit. He's had three teachers already that say they don't know how to motivate him. - Robert had started school, and he was having a few problems. He's a square peg in a round hole in the normal mainstream schools, so we've actually moved him now to another high school that's a community school which is much more relaxed, and as a family unit, we're a lot more calmer. - I was gonna be a policeman, but I thought how hard it would be to join in. I just haven't made up my mind yet. I was gonna be a phys ed teacher, but one of the teachers told me you had to get up into university. - At 21, Paul was working as a junior partner for a firm of bricklayers. By 28, he'd gone out on his own as a sub-contractor, but it didn't work out. - Well, I've gone from being stable in one, basically one job, which was the bricklaying to probably had about 10 or 15 jobs. I've never really counted them. Although, I haven't been sacked from jobs, I've just been, I haven't been able to settle. - Paul now works for a plastics company installing industrial signs. - I think I've got to a stage now I just want to stay in work. Two or three years ago, I tried to increase my skills and I went back to school and took a carpentry certificate because I wanted to go out and work as a carpenter, but I basically found there were too many good carpenters out of work for the jobs that were available. So, I didn't go too far with that. I suppose, partly it's my confidence in myself. The monitors up in the washroom sends the nurse out, well there's no talking, and I wasn't talking today, and Brown sent me out for nothing. I find it hard to express emotion most of the time, although I'm getting on top of that more now, you know? I mean, just the simple things to say to sort of Susan, you know, I love you, something like that. I mean, I can tell you about it, but I really haven't been able to say it freely to Sue, you know? - Is confidence still an issue with you? Yeah, yeah, unfortunately, I've learned to live with it, sort of accept it, but I've never really got on top of it fully, which is, it really annoys me, but I don't know what to do about it though. I'm more at peace around the horses and the animals. I can be upset, I can be on edge, come down to the horses, and within three or four minutes of being here, and I've forgotten everything, so it does calm you down. But I can be a pretty angry person, and you know, in the wrong circumstances, I can fire up terribly, but fortunately, it doesn't happen too often these days. - At the beginning of this year, Paul and Sue moved to another Melbourne suburb. - It's like living in a palace compared to our other house 'cause it's nearly twice the size. - I think there's probably a few more professional people live around this area, I think. - So, you moved up the market a bit? - Yeah, yeah, we have 'cause we got to a point where we paid the other house off, so you, I suppose, it's a form of forced savings too. I think we will have to tighten up. - We wouldn't manage just on Paul's wage alone. It's a difference sometimes between eating and not eating and just paying the bills, you know? Most people these days rely on two wages to survive. - I don't think it needs much. - I've been doing the mobile hairdressing now since Robert was a baby. - So boring cutting curly hair. - With this job, I mean, I go and I cut people's hair, but it's like going visiting all day and some of the people don't really want me there doing their hair. They just want to come and have a chat and tell them what I've been up to and for them to tell me what they've been up to. - I've got 23 three-penny pieces, and I don't know how many halfpenny pieces I've got now. - I spend, yeah, I spend. He doesn't save because I don't give him any to save, basically 'cause, you know, like I, you know, these days you don't get a pay packet. Well, I mean, I get money as I go, but Paul's wages is paid straight into the bank, and you know, it's really no money anymore. You don't see it, it's just straight into the bank, and then all the money comes out, and it's just pretend, isn't it? - I quite often joke that I think it's absolute myth that I actually get paid at all because I haven't seen any money for some years now so. - In their 20s, Paul and Sue sold up, bought an old van, and travelled across Australia. - I think it brought us closer together because we got to know each other and relied on each other so much. - When I was younger, I definitely wanted to move out of Melbourne. I would have only needed that encouragement from Sue. If Susan had been exactly the same, we wouldn't be here now. I think as I'm getting older, I'm more nervous about doing that. I still know there's a huge amount of space out there, and I don't know why, but obviously that's important to me. It's just such a beautiful country right down to even barren land. - What's the most fun in life at the moment for the two of you? - I'd say Christmas holidays. - Yeah, Christmas holidays. - Down at the beach. - Yeah. - With the kids, you know, 'cause they kids love it. - We had a great summer this year, and we had a whole week of great weather. - It's what a family should be, and that's why it stands out I suppose. I mean, I guess I do feel middle-aged, but I'm sort of pretty comfortable with it. I can always remember when I was younger, I always looked forward to getting older, and then even hopefully into the 80s that even, you know. It's never been something that's really worried me. - One of our ambitions was always just to grow old together. - That's true, we used to say that. - Yeah. I keep telling my children, isn't it nice to be loved and to know that someone loves you. It must be really sad for people out there that have no one that don't know they're loved, and each day, you know, sometimes you're coming home, and you think, "Well, they'll all be home," and it's nice to just come home. - Some people from Africa come here, but when they go, they put their clothes on. - Jackie, Lyn, and Sue all grew up in the East End of London and were friends in the same junior school. - Well, I've never been abroad. - Neither have I. - I have, I have. - Oh yeah 'cause you went on that cruise. - Yeah. - I've had the opportunities in life that I've wanted. - I'd say we've had more opportunities. - Yeah, right, you've made. I think that we all could have gone any way that we wanted to at the time within our capabilities. I mean, we chose our own jobs, we were able to choose our own jobs quite freely. Well, we only had a limited choice anyway, I mean, truth be told. - Yes, we did have a choice. - We didn't have the choice of private education - Oh, no. - Because they couldn't have afforded it anyway. I wish I had wanted something that bad that I had to go for it, and I hope, I really hope my two want something and are hungry for it, you know, and they'll go for it. I'd love that, you know. - They have, I think, different things, I mean, technology has taken off so much in the last 10 years. - Yes, computers. - They have access to a lot more in some way, into an awful lot more than we had. I'm going to work at Woolworths. Well, I'm school Mobile Librarian and assistant to the young people's office, which is where we are now. - At 21, Lyn had set out on a career working in a mobile library in Tower Hamlets in East London. - I've not stamped yours, "Sleeping Beauty." Teaching children the beauty of books and watching their faces as books unfold to them is just fantastic. To work with children of that age, you've got to love them, and I love children. - Because of cuts in the education budget, Tower Hamlets closed the mobile library, and Lyn went to work in Bethnal Green. - One of the jobs that was going was divisional children's librarian and they based me here. They hadn't had a children's librarian here for nine years. You can draw better than I can. Right, the story I've got for you this morning is called "The Magic Bicycle," and it's all about Mark. I do regularly class visits with 19, 20 classes, more than that, coming in to the library. And within that, we do either a storytelling session or library skills. "But he couldn't ride it." I've been a governor on schools in Tower Hamlets for 12, 13 years, being Chair of Governors at the moment. - I've had the parent on the phone two or three times this week wondering what's happening. They wanted to come in and discuss with me and the coordinator about how well the project was going and to observe a lesson. - We've got a few problems with these knots. Can anyone think of another way? - Can you ever see yourself not working? - No. I like the excitement. I like the push of filling my life. It's stimulating. There are times I go home, I'm absolutely shattered. I go home, I go to sleep. - Well, I know he is hers and he loves her. - I don't, I love him. - I had an all-white wedding. All white. We were both in white and my bridesmaid was in white. I've been married a year and couple of months. You do think, "Christ, what have I done?" - See, I've still got... - And I'm being honest about it. And Russ thinks the same. You think at times, you think, "Christ what have I done?" - Lyn married Russ at 19. They have two daughters Sarah and Emma. - We married young but because we wanted to go out and have fun together and grow together. - How do you manage to keep a career going and bring up a family? Hold a marriage together? - We've always had a very good partnership. I couldn't do it without him. Russ cooks during the week, I cook at weekends. It's not as if I'm going belting home because I've got to go and cook a meal for everybody. I know that when I get home, it's gonna be done. We're there together and we love each other, and we've never stopped. If I could, I would have two girls and two boys. - Yeah, right. - Used by a doctor in medicines and controlled doses is fine. 50% of teenagers between 14 and 18 have tried drugs. - I think Emma is more like me. Sarah's much more placid. She's like Russ. - The wrong drug is deadly. - With the girls in their teens now, I've looked back and thought Emma is very much like I was. - Why am I using a wooden spoon, please? - The noise. - The noise, yes, we've got 16 people, 16 saucepans. - I mean, Emma has just done her GCSEs. She got 10 and gone back to sixth form college, doing A Levels. She doesn't know what she wants to do. - Excuse me. - Yup. - It is wonderful, except we got... - She's got her own life now. She's building that life and she's making her own decisions. - Thing about Liverpool, we can drive so far. - We go through stages, the terrible twos. At the time, when you are going through them, it seems terrible, they're never ever going to end. Stir it. I know, sort of Mum and Dad would say, "Ah, but you know, don't worry, that will go, "you'll come through it to the next stage "and the next stage". And I think it's ongoing like that. I'd love to be able to talk to my mum and dad and say, "Really, did I really put you through that?" I remember some of it, and god, yes, I must have, but until you go through it with your own, you never, ever, realise what hell you put your parents through. - By the time she was 35, Lyn's mother had died. - She was a great friend to me as well as a mum, probably the best friend I'll ever have. It's only two years. To some, it probably seems, oh it's a long time, but it's not very long. The biggest area of my life that's changed since we last talked is I lost my dad, and literally just after 34 Up went out, he died. I mean, they looked after the girls while I worked. After mum died, the first thing dad said was, "That's my job now". And of course, suddenly we had neither of them. All right, watch it, you. - At 35, Lyn was having a health problem of her own. - They stuck all these tubes up inside me and discovered that I'd got these veins up here that shouldn't be there. - In your brain? - Mm-hmm. - And what can they do about it? - Not a lot at the moment. They're investigating other treatments, but the surgeon said that he doesn't want to operate at the moment because the risk, it's too near the optic nerve. Well, it's never gonna go away. I've still got this vein malformation, and it'll always be there. Obviously, I've had it from birth. Hello, Neil, it's Lyn. How'd it go last night, did you manage to get into it? There is a 1% chance that it could haemorrhage. I've got more chance being knocked down crossing the street, and in that perspective, I don't worry about it at all. Oh, it's just problems now. - And do you think about dying a lot? - No, doesn't worry me at all. My dad taught me that. He wasn't scared of death at all, and it's the people that are left behind that take the brunt of someone dying. That one was, yes, so they'll keep that back, and once the person that's reserved it. - Is there a spiritual side to your life? - Yes. - Can you talk about that? - No. - Why? - It's private, it's personal, it's me. It's part of what makes me up, makes me me. - Sometimes, things are not good, are they? And I know that you would've thought about that because at the moment. - Do you think morality has changed in your lifetime? - Yes, I think we've lost an awful lot of morality. A lot of values in my opinion have gone. - Like what? - Respect. There seems to be a great lack of respect for anything. I think that's what makes part of it hard bringing up children nowadays because our values are so high and actually expecting them to maintain those values. - Are you asking too much of them? - You do expect a lot of them, but I think, I think I'm flexible as well. I'm learning when to let go. If I say that I love you - I mean, for me, I'm lucky, yeah, everything's worked out. Unlike the girls, they've lost a relationship, and then they've gained new ones for them. For them, that's the way their lives have gone. - That's right. - Russ and I have been together a long time. - I actually envy you that. - Of course, we both do. - I do envy you that because I don't know how, whatever the reasoning behind it, you and Russ have made that work, and that was something that I failed at. - And me, yeah, it was a failure, definitely. - If we did all love Geoffrey, and we all want to marry him. - Yeah! - I think I know the one that he'd like best and that's her. - I don't think I'll get married too early. I'd like to have a full life first and meet people - I'd like to enjoy myself before I... - Yeah, before you commit yourself to a family. - We had a teacher at school that his favourite ploy was, "All you girls want to do is walk out, "get married, have babies, and push a pram down the street "with a fag hanging outside your mouth." - Marriage means a different thing to me. I've still got my ideals about marriage. I don't know what it's all about. - Sue was 24 when she married Billy. They had two children, William and Katherine. - I think that to get married young, there must be things that you miss. You must miss that crucial stage of being yourself because the minute you get married, you're no longer a single being, you're a partnership and that should be the idea behind it. - By the time she was 34, she and Billy had divorced. - I've never sat down and thought, "What was it, was it this, was it that?" I just knew it wasn't working. I mean, there have been relationships when I could have settled, but they didn't feel quite right, so I've always come away and pulled away and just waited until the right one come along. If they ever do. Deep down I probably wish I wasn't having to do this. I mean, I'd like to still be married, and I'd like to have that steady relationship. But I'm the type of person that likes to go out and likes to have a good time. So, it's not that hard for me. But I think as you get into your 40s, you start thinking, "Well, maybe I should slow down a bit." I've been a single parent for a long while, and I've brought them up on my own really because Katherine was only two when Bill left. It's been extremely hard and sometimes it's been very lonely. - And do you think William misses not having a dad? - He probably does. He doesn't talk an awful lot about it. - It looks good. - So, charming. - He seems so together. He's quite deep, so he doesn't say an awful lot. He's got my dad, my dad's there. My children probably owe a lot to my mum and dad. I mean, my mum and dad have been absolutely brilliant. With William, I want him to have a really satisfying career. Get your tie done. Which is something that I've really had. For him, I would love that. Well for both of them, but particularly for him 'cause he can go far if he puts his mind to it. You know, he may go to university, we have talked about it if he does well. He's capable of it. With Katherine, she talks about doing things like hairdressing and girlie things, you know, 'cause she doesn't really know what she wants to do yet. She just wants to enjoy herself at the moment. I can remember being the same when I was her age. But she loves babies and she keeps saying, "Mum I want a," and I say, "Don't even think about it," you know. I hope not. It was very hard first of all when I gave up work, from having a fairly high salary to nothing was hard, but you get used to it. Whatever your circumstances are, you live in them, you get used to them and you cope, everybody does. - When her children were old enough to go to school, Sue started work again. She has an office job in the Law Faculty of the University of London. - Can I please have an examination form? - Yeah, sure. I've always worked, but anyone who's got teenagers knows how expensive it is, and there are times when I can't quite manage what I'd like to do with them, especially school trips and things like that. All right, thanks. Bye. I've got certain little savings, things that I do for them and policies and things that will come out when they're 21 and hopefully things that when they get married or if they want a car. I mean, there are times that are hard when you are on your own. Your guitar It sounds so sweetly We've all got little secret dreams. I'd love to sing, along with millions of others. It's just the radio But I didn't want to give up work, and I didn't want to risk all that to follow the dream. Said you'd be coming back this way again, baby There are still lots of places that I want to go to. Lots of wild things that I want to do, jumping out of a plane. Silly things that you can do, but you just never seem to get round to. Just never seem to get round to it, but I think you should make sure you do. I'm just basically a happy person. I don't get upset in front of the kids, and that's important that I don't ever want to upset them because there have been times when I have been hurt over the last few years, but I've done my best to keep that from them. They don't need that. But you're not really here I'm with someone now which is nice, it feels right, but it's early days yet. Regrets, everyone wants to be a perfect parent, but I'm not. I do the best I can, and I can't say it's the worst part of me that I go out such a lot because I don't think that it hurts them. It's a completely different lifestyle I've got to what my mum and dad had, but they are just so there for me, and they're more responsible for the way my kids are than I am. I really do - Sue. - I would like to get married when I grow up, but I don't know what sort of boy, but I think one that's not got a lot of money but has got some money, not a lot. - Have you got any boyfriends? - That's personal, innit? - Don't like the way he came out with that. - We shan't tell him, shall we? - That was horrific really, the cake, what happened to the wedding cake. I mean, it was sitting right in between Mick and myself, and suddenly the columns just completely gave way and it fell into one. I would say on average, 19 is probably too young. - By the time she was 34, Jackie and Mick had divorced. - We decided ourselves, I mean, just between the two of us, we knew it wasn't going any further. We both knew, I think, at the end of the day, we would be happier leading our own lives. My mum 'cause she got five girls, she has seven years back luck, that's why she's got five girls. I'd like to be able to have a happy family, I mean, I know it's not possible to be happy all the time, but as much of the time that was possible. Go through there, that's the nursery. - Got any plans? - Do me a favour. - She and Mick decided early on that they didn't want children. - Well, do you sometimes feel like wringing his neck? - Basically, I would say because I'm far too selfish. I enjoy doing what I want when I want and how I want and certainly at the moment, I can't see any way around that. That's not to say that's a forever decision. Oh! And this one on, here we go! Oh, yeah! I had a brief, but very sweet relationship, the result of which was Charlie. Cor blimey, Charlie, you're supposed to be cleaning your teeth, not eating the brush. It's the best thing that could've happened to me, and I would never have believed I could've enjoyed a child as much as I enjoy him. Anybody that wanted to know just got told I was pregnant. I wasn't with the father, end of story. Oi, give us a cuddle. I don't really want Charlie to be an only. I'd love him to have brothers and sisters, but not necessarily loads of 'em, just one would do actually. Bed, Charlie Brown. Right, Charlie, there's yours. Please, eat it all up. - Oh! - And James. - Thanks, Mum. - Good boy. And last but not least. Gonna eat that one for me? - After her relationship with Charlie's father ended, she met Ian and had two more sons. Which one is the most like you, do you think? - At the moment, personality wise, probably James. He's the cheeky one, he's the one full of confidence. Charlie's the quieter one, Charlie's the grown up. Lee's an absolute bullet. If he wants to do something, he just does it, I mean, no fear of anything, but they are all good boys. You can take them almost anywhere. - Almost? - Almost anywhere, yeah. - And what is the most fun? - The little things that they come out with. The shear unexpected pleasure of them. I don't know, it's really hard to describe, but they come up with so many different comments. - Finished. - This is actually a place called Newmains, which is about a 40-minute drive from Glasgow, about 15-minute drive from Motherwell. - So, how did you land up here? - Well, because the boys dad's Scottish, and this is his hometown, and we decided that, I mean, Charlie was what, five, about to start school, and it was now or never. If we hadn't moved then, I don't think we would ever have done it, but obviously, I am glad that we did. There's a lot more here for the boys. They've got a lot more freedom here. The way the people treat each other and talk to each other, it's more like a village and that's a good advert, I think. A very good advert, I like it far more than I ever did London. - Not long after settling in Scotland, Ian and Jackie split up. - Thank you. - We're now living on our own, although he is a regular visitor and sees the children quite often. - Lee! - When any couple parts, and I don't care how good or how bad the terms are. - Lee! - There's always a tendency for recrimination, you know, just the usual petty, this was your fault, this was, you know, and blaming each other and that, and it took us a long while to realise just how much the boys were listening to us. They could so easily have grown up thinking that it was their fault and it wasn't, not in any way, shape, or form. They just happened to be the unlucky victims of it. - What would you do if you had lots of money, about maybe two pounds? - I would buy meself a new nice house, wouldn't I? One that's all nice and comfy. When Ian and I split up, I actually went into temporary accommodation, and I got housed a couple of miles from here, but that was furnished because I didn't have anything to take with me. I was there seven weeks and they offered me this one, and with the help of family and friends and word goes out, "Jackie is needing some stuff," and it all just suddenly arrived. The poor, if you don't help them, they'll sort of die soon, wouldn't they? I think it might be a bit low on the ground, the snow. I don't think there's enough there, do you? I don't cope financially. Without my mother-in-law stepping in to fill the gap, I wouldn't be coping. It's really hard to explain to anyone who's not had to do it, but you may, you get to a point where either that bill doesn't get paid or your children don't eat. So obviously. your children eat, which means that either my mother-in-law pays the bill, or she makes sure that my food's in for the following week so I can pay the bills, but it's not easy to live like it. Say, "Come on, swans!" She's brilliant. If I could have chosen a mother-in-law, she was the one I would have chosen. She's great for me. She's absolutely brilliant with the children, and she's just always there when I need her to be. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, you leave him alone. At the moment, I mean, a career's probably about the furthest thing from my mind. I don't really know what I'm aiming for except to get the house together. My father had a reasonably good education. He never went to the local comprehensive, but at the same time, I don't think he was too worried which way I decided to go. Oh, I've no doubts I could have done more. Certainly when I was younger, it was probably laziness that stopped me. Oh! When we did the last programme, I think there was actually a comment my father made at the time was maybe he should have pushed me a little bit harder. And I think maybe in retrospect, he should have done, and that's probably the one thing that I will do with mine that he didn't do with me. I think I should push 'em just that little bit harder. James, you watch, you're catching up to him. Go on, Lee. I was working up here until very recently, but they've discovered that I've got rheumatoid arthritis, so at the moment, that's put work on hold. It's painful, very painful, particularly my hands, my feet, and my shoulders. It can be almost crippling at times. I get tired, and that obviously makes life awkward at home with the children. - I wanna see. - No, you're not. Well, there is certainly no cure. At the moment, they're trying to stem it so that it gets no worse. Whether we're having much success at that, it's still quite early days, so I really don't know at the moment. I certainly don't feel that great at the moment. Are we ready? One, two, three, go! Swimming is one of the best things for arthritis. It can help as long as you don't overdo it, but having said that, I'll pay for it tomorrow. I'll be stiff tomorrow. I shouldn't really lift Lee. If Lee wants a cuddle, he should sit on my lap, and I should cuddle him on my lap, but how do you tell a four-year-old, no you can't lift them. I mean, I can't stop being his mum just because I'm not well. - Do you remember those scenes at 21 when you were showing them round the house at East Chiltern. - East Chiltern, yeah. - Boy, we've gone a long way, haven't we? - Just a bit. Oh god, in fact, don't flash back to that at this point please. Just the double chins and the age, and I mean, the funny part about is is that you don't think about your age until you think about something like that. I mean, when you think about how many years ago that was, and it was all so new and fresh. I mean, I've done exactly the same now. I've just started all over again, but with three children in tow this time. But that's life. - So much hope then, wasn't there? - There still is. Oh, there still is. Don't make that mistake, Mike. I am in no way, I am down and I am depressed about my illness, but I'm certainly not down and depressed about my life. Nothing's gonna do that, I've got three wonderful boys. I've got a loving family around me. I mean, I'm lucky. There are a lot of people that are a damn sight worse off than I am, a lot of people. - Well, we pretend we've got swords, and we make the noises of the swords fighting, and when somebody stabs us, we go, "Argh." - Neil grew up in a Liverpool suburb. - In the winter, if you live in the country, well it was just all wet and there wouldn't be anything for miles around and you'd get soaked if you tried to go out and there's no shelter anywhere except in your own house. But in the town, you can go out on wet wintry days 'cause you can always find somewhere to shelter 'cause there's lots of places. - At 14, he was at a local comprehensive school. - I think it's a very good idea to have competition, otherwise you might start to relax really, and not try hard enough. Being in Set One, it's very, very hard to keep up with the leaders. I never have the time to relax at all. - Neil had dreams of going to Oxford, but he didn't get in. Instead, he went to Aberdeen University but dropped out after a term. At 21, he was living on a building site and living in a squat. - I came to London and I contacted an agency for squatters, and they were able to give me the address of somebody who was able to help people who were looking for accommodation in the London area. - You kicked against the stability. - I don't think I ever had any stability to be quite honest. I can't think of any time in my life when I ever did. I don't think I've been kicking against anything. I think I've been kicking in mid-air the whole of my life. - At 28, he was homeless wandering around the west coast of Scotland. - If the state didn't give us any money, it would probably just mean crime, and I'm glad I don't have to steal to keep myself alive. If the money runs out, well then for a few days, there's nowhere to go to and that's all you can do. I simply have to find the warmest shed I can find. - How do people regard you here? - Well, I'm still known as an eccentric, as I have been since about the age of 16 or so. I'm not claiming that I feel as though I'm in some sort of Nirvana, but I'm claiming that if I was living in a bedsit in suburbia, I'd be so miserable, I'd feel like cutting my throat. - At 35, we found him living on a council estate in the most northerly part of Britain, the Shetland Islands. - The nice thing about here is that you can cut yourself off when you want because there are people living around, but they're pretty quiet people. It's an environment which sustains me, it's one in which I can survive. I still feel my real place is in the world where people are doing what the majority of people do. And the reason I don't feel safe is because I think I'm getting more and more used to this lifestyle, which eventually, I shall have to give up. - And what would you like to be doing, say, in seven years? - I can think of all kinds of things that I'd like to be doing. The real question is what am I likely to be doing. - What are you likely to be doing? - And that's a horrible question. I tend to think most likely the answer is I'll be wandering homeless around the streets of London, but with a bit of luck, that won't happen. Some of the considerable disadvantages that residents of Trowbridge state area have in comparison with those in other parts of Hackney, first of all, they are geographically isolated. They're separated from most of Hackney by... - At 42, he's a Liberal Democrat member of Hackney Council. He was elected two years ago. - While I was in Shetland, I felt very strongly that I should become involved in politics simply because I felt I was not achieving anything in the ways I really wanted to, and I could see decisions being made politically by people I felt were not competent to make them and who I felt were not representing the majority of the public and I felt angry. And I felt in my own small way, I gotta get in there. And I think more people should. I think that it's only apathy which leads to bad government at any level. - It's like a million miles away from the Shetlands here. How have you coped with that? - That is one aspect of it. Certainly adjusting to London after all that period away, even though I'd been back occasionally for visits, was extremely difficult. It became progressively easier. The first six hours were an absolute nightmare, and then the first week was pretty bad, and I suppose it took me a year or so to adjust. I suppose, I would. Yes, well, I would like to be somebody in a position of importance. I've always thought this, but I don't think I'm the right sort of person to carry the responsibility for whatever it is. I've always though well I'd love to be, possibly love to be in politics or something like this. The question of longterm sickly delegation, as you'll be aware, Chair, the Liberal Democrats oppose. - Do you have any nerves when you stand up and give speeches or make arguments or defend positions? - Yes, of course, and if I didn't, it would be wrong, and the councillor who has no nerves is not doing his job. It becomes slightly easier after the first time, and I'm glad you didn't record my first speech because most of the chamber walked out, and I determined like Disraeli to say something, like well, "You're not listening now, "but one day, you will hear me." But unfortunately, most of the chamber had already walked out, so it was hardly worth saying that, and also, I didn't believe that it would necessarily be the case. Well, I'm going to take people to the country and sometimes take them to the seaside, and I'll have a big loudspeaker in the motor coach and tell them whereabouts we are and what we're going to do and what the name of the road is and all about that. - Do the days seem long for you? - They can do. - Do you have any friends anywhere? - I've some good friends still in England. Father God, we thank you for the love that you show to us all in creation. We pray that that love may grow and take root wherever Bruce and Penny find themselves from now on. We pray that you will give them both understanding and patience. - I think it was just after the 28 programme. There was organised a dinner just to say farewell to everybody really. I don't think the idea was that we would get to know each other and become friends and see each other in the meanwhile, but I think Neil turned up without much notice. I can't really remember. - I came down from Scotland. - Okay, right. And I don't think anywhere had been arranged for him to stay. I think there was for all those, you know, I'm not exactly sure what happened, and I said, "Well, you can always kip on my spare bed." - I think that the time between my moving to London from Shetland and actually finding my own accommodation in London must have been round about two months, and all that time I stayed with Bruce. - And was that difficult? - Not at all. He was the model host, although he did always insist on measuring the amount of bathwater there was in the bath. I'm not quite sure why that was, I never actually found out. - I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you know, like he'd find the fridge a bit noisy, so he'd turn it off. Or if I had to hoover, he'd walk round the block or. - Well, I didn't basically stay in. - No, no, no, no, that's true. - No, I accept that I wasn't the model lodger in every way and however that only emphasises how patient you actually were. - No. - How has Bruce helped you? - Well, he has just been a good loyal friend, and I appreciate what he has tried, done to help me to set up in London and just been someone to talk to when the need has arisen. When I grow up, I want to be an astronaut. If I can't be an astronaut, I think I'll be a coach driver. This is probably linked up with the fact now that I want to travel. I mean, my thoughts haven't really changed that much, but I definitely would like to be a coach driver now. I've trained to be a teacher of English as a foreign language. I've been on a number of training courses, and I did an Open University degree. That was perhaps the longest of all. It was an Open University BA. I took a number of subjects. This is all background I suppose and really perhaps you'd like to know whether I've done any work and the answer is no. - Another one? - There you are. There will be plenty in the next few weeks. - I know all about. - All Neil's political work is voluntary, like the canvassing he did for the Liberal Democrats at last year's Winchester By-Election. - Thanks. - He lives entirely off State Benefit. - I haven't had any paid work apart from a couple of interim government schemes. I worked in a local community theatre for about six months. I worked as a gardener, fairly inevitably. - Does it worry you, living off benefits, living off the state? - Yeah, of course. I feel as I am a drain on people who are working hard to provide the money. It's not that I don't think there shouldn't be a benefit service. I think there should be work for all or for as many who want to do it, and I'm not satisfied with efforts that have been made to provide work for those who want it. When I get married, I don't want to have any children because they're always doing naughty things and making the whole house untidy. I don't know what the best age is for falling in love and maybe when you're in love in your teens, you really are in love and when you think you're in love later on, you're not. Or maybe I'm still not old enough to really fall in love. I always told myself that I would never have children. - Why? - Because, because, well because children inherit something from their parents, and even if my wife were the most high-spirited and ordinary and normal of people, the child would still stand a very fair chance of being not totally full of happiness because of what he or she will have inherited from me. Well, I'm not married. I value all experience, and I feel this part of my life hasn't happened. I'm not homosexual, therefore I do hanker after a stable relationship with a woman. I have never been able to achieve that, and I think I'm somehow deficient in my ability to react to certain of the needs of others through not having had that relationship. I feel, especially sometimes when I'm on my own, that I'm losing touch with the way other people live. - Do you worry about your sanity? - Other people sometimes worry about it. - Like who? - As I said, I sometimes can be found behaving in an erratic fashion. Sometimes get very frustrated, very angry for no apparent reason. For a reason which won't be apparent to other people around me. - Do you ever think you're going mad? - Oh, I don't think it, I know it. We don't like to use the word mad. I think most people are mad here really. My health has been a lot better more recently than at other times in my life. Maybe being busy has been part of the cure. And I think my Christian faith has helped me. - I can actually say, now, many thanks for the prayers. They were really nice, they were thoughtful. - I also believe as my friends who have been so loyal have got to know me more better and better, and there is always room for getting to know people better, that they themselves have been able to show support and sympathy in the most appropriate ways. - Is this a good time in your life? - Yes, probably, I've never been busier, and I've never been in contact with so many people. - Now, the one thing I do have say is please put all the leaflets right through the letterboxes. - I feel incredibly grateful for the opportunity to do what I'm doing. I'm grateful to the people that elected me. I hope I haven't let them down. I hope I will be re-elected, and that depends on my performance in the last two years. - In May, he was re-elected for another term. - I don't think there's a councillor in the country who wouldn't like to see themselves as an MP, and yet they say every politician wants to be Prime Minister. But I'm quite happy at the moment doing my council work trying to serve what I perceive is a very great need in Hackney. Well, I suppose I've done many more things than on previous occasions, but whether I've changed inside, I can't say. - What's the most enjoyable thing in life for you at the moment? - I think it's looking to the future. - Well, that's a change for the better, isn't it? - Well, perhaps that's just because I'm getting old. I think it's me believing that things can't be so bad in the future as they have been in the past, and I think there are certain short-term objectives I have here in Hackney, and if I can achieve a few of those, then I'll be pleased. - Wee! - What effect has it had on you being in these films, do you think? - It's funny because before the films start, you think, what on earth have I done with the seven years that I could possibly say. What can I talk about that I've done, and you panic, you think, "I should have done something. "I should have done something dramatic." You know, I was hoping I'd win the lottery last night so that I could come on and say, but life's not like that. - Well, I mean we were talking about my ambitions as a scientist. I mean, my ambition as a scientist is to be more famous for doing science than for being in this film, but unfortunately, Michael, it's not gonna happen. - I have met some of the most interesting people who I am still in contact with, and this includes people in different parts of the world. And one or two particularly close friendships have been forged through the programme. Although I had to say, I was very suspicious when the initial contact was made. - I mean, I don't think I'd ever have kept a record of my life in the way that we have with this programme so, yes, I mean, I enjoyed doing it, but it's not, it's not something that sort of takes a great precedence. - If you came and asked me if you could do this to my children, I certainly wouldn't be enthusiastic. I think it's something that I wouldn't want to wish on someone particularly. - I think for the first 40-odd years, it's restricted me because I was always shy to start with and knowing that people were gonna be looking at me and watching me, rather than do something that's gonna look stupid, I've always pulled myself back. - There's a lot of baggage that gets stirred up every seven years for me that I find quite, that I find very hard to deal with, and I can put it away for the seven years, and then it comes round again, and the whole lot comes tumbling out again, and I have to deal with it all over again. - It hasn't changed my choices in life. I haven't though, "Well, I have to be doing this by then," or, "How will this seem to others," or so on. It's just a kind of periodic little intrusion. - It's the only time, when you're a cabbie, instead of you picking up a celebrity and saying "Hello you're Paul Gasgoigne, ain't ya?" And when they go, "I know you," and they turn the tables on you, you know. - And do you like that? - It's not a question of like it, I'm used to it. I don't mind it. - You do like it. - It has to be said that I bitterly regret that the headmaster of the school where I was when I was seven pushed me forward for this series because every seven years, a little pill of poison is injected into. - Oh no. - Well, it's the truth. - Being honest, I think despite all the things that I might have said over the years about, "Oh, coming again" and that sort, I think there's a certain amount of excitement there too underlying, I'm old enough to admit it now I suppose. You know? No, it probably is a bit of good fun, I think. - Some of us don't see family from one year to the next, seven years on, and I think that's how we all feel about each other, but we're linked and that can never go. - At the end of their very special day in London after their trip to the zoo and the party, we took our children to an adventure playground where they could do just what they liked. Those from the children's home set about building a house. There's Nicholas. There's Tony. Andrew. And Bruce. Suzi. Jackie and her friends. Give me a child until he is seven, and I will give you the man. This has been a glimpse of Britain's future. |
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