Some of the best writing
in New York won't be found
in books, or movies,
or plays..
...but on the benches
of Central Park.
Read the benches
and you understand.
Enormous things
happen in every life.
On the other hand, some of
the worst writing in New York
could be found at 222
East 30th Street, Apartment 3C.
The walls of which
were decorated
with rejection letters
from magazines
located in 12 countries,
47 states
and the District of Columbia.
When I think
about those stories
and how I didn't realize
what was missing from them
not even tears,
rivers of shame
come out of my eyes.
I wasn't interested
in friends or girlfriends.
All I did was write
and read and mumble to myself.
It's a form
of mental illness really.
Now, in New York, you're never
more than 20 feet away
from someone you know, or
someone you're meant to know.
But in my whole life,
I only crossed the street once.
I might never have thought
of anything to say
but then I smelled
the smoke from her cigarette.
It was heavy,
I recognized it from outside
a restaurant one time, it was
either French or Spanish.
And I didn't speak Spanish.
Shall we continue in English?
Please.
My name is Brian.
May I ask your name?
Arielle.
Arielle.
Like "The Little Mermaid."
What?
"The Little Mermaid,"
it's a Disney film.
The little mermaid's
name was Arielle.
Yes, I'm familiar. Tha...
That's where your mind goes?
She was actually
a very interesting character.
Really?
Yes.
A beautiful woman
who lived in the sea and..
...had the tail of a fish,
and yet she..
Somehow for her,
it all worked.
Did you see it
yesterday or something?
No. When I was 8.
The day before yesterday.
What's the French word for..
Sirene.
Sirene, nice.
Well, enchante, Brian.
Enchante.
Will we meet again?
I would like it very much
if that would happen.
Well, I'm here every Friday
at the close
of lunch in my exile.
You would simply
have to be here as well.
I will be then.
Good. Until next Friday then.
Until next Friday.
Hi, Jim.
How are you today?
Good.
Work is going
very well, dad.
Well, it's gonna sound
stupid, but the fiction editor
from the "Atlantic"
added the word "Sorry"
to the bottom
of my latest rejection.
What the hell
does that mean?
It means I got close.
It's code.
Can we talk
about law school?
No, thank you.
No law school.
Any job worth having
requires a second interview.
I thought perhaps
you wouldn't come.
It never occurred to me.
I mean, because of the rain.
Is it raining?
It was a good test.
A woman has to know what
sort of man she's dealing with.
What sort of man
am I dealing with?
Damp.
A damp sort of man..
...but happy in his dampness.
What sort of woman
am I dealing with?
Une sirene.
Thank you.
So, Brian, what is it
you do in your life
that leaves you free
to wander about the streets
in the afternoons, and smoke
in nooks, and talk to strangers?
I write.
I'm a writer.
Have you published?
No, not yet.
How old are you?
What are your stories about?
Various things.
One is about..
...baseball.
One is about..
...dogs.
Dogs?
Yes.
Uh-huh. So, do you
have any questions for me?
May I ask your profession?
Are you asking me
if I'm a prostitute?
No. No. No.
No. No. No.
Are you... a prostitute?
Certainly not.
How dare you?
You brought it up.
I would have never...
I was a model.
I stopped 8 years ago.
Are you wondering how old I am?
Yes.
I'm 33.
Back to coffee
with your friends?
Yes.
Until next Friday?
Hmm, if you wish, well, I'm
free any weeknight from 5 to 7.
Ah, those are
very specific hours.
Yes, they are.
Alright. Well... shall
we say Monday at 5?
Do you like museums?
Would you meet me
at the Guggenheim?
I'd be delighted.
Good.
Till then, then.
Till then.
No, he... he didn't write,
"We will publish your next story."
Is that what dad told you?
So then, what did he write?
He just wrote, "Sorry."
And were they sorry today?
No, they didn't write sorry
on today's rejections.
Well, that's
a step backward.
It's not a step
backwards, mom.
Progress is not linear.
It's about death.
I beg your pardon?
And menace.
It's about death and menace.
It's a... boat.
A nice boat.
It's near a beautiful beach
and it's... sunny.
Is there any life
on that boat?
No.
And what is the opposite of life?
Death, but...
It's like a neutron bomb went off.
Maybe they're
just below decks.
And it's not just
this painting.
Look at this one. Ha!
This one has people in it.
Dead people.
They're alive.
Not really.
Look at that man.
Is he alive?
And the soda jerk?
Is that any kind of life?
And the prostitute?
Okay, she's not a prostitute.
What is it with you
and prostitutes?
What is she then?
She's..
I don't know,
she's a beautician.
They're all dead.
And the store across the street
is out of business.
And no one lives
in the apartment upstairs.
The tenants have been evicted
and the building condemned.
This Hopper is supposed
to be the quintessential
American painter.
Well, if that's true,
then America is not alive.
America is alive, okay?
And you have a somewhat
downbeat world view.
No, I don't.
And prove it.
Prove what?
That America is still alive.
Look around.
They don't seem particularly
alive to me. Prove it.
Alright.
You may be right,
I don't know.
Your accent is beautiful.
Thank you,
but you're a man infatuated
and so nothing you say
can be believed.
What made you settle
in New York?
I married a diplomat
who was assigned here.
I mean, I wondered
if you'd been married.
What happened to him?
What do you mean?
The person
you were married to.
Were married to?
Well, I'm married to.
Well, nothing happened to him.
He works at
the French Consulate.
It's a few blocks from here.
So... so, you're married?
Of course,
what did you think?
I thought you
were... not married.
Why would you think that?
Why would I not think that?
For one thing, you don't
wear a wedding ring.
So American, you need
a signpost for everything
or you'll completely
lose your way.
It's not just Americans.
Many cultures have
indicators of marriage.
Rings, piercings, dots..
...designed to keep people
out of exactly this sort of..
...awkward situation.
Do you wish you were not
in that situation?
Oh, so we seem to be
mutually pursuing one another.
Yes, so?
Well, I, uh..
I would have thought
you'd mention...
Well, must everything
be mentioned?
Can nothing be culled from the subtext?
Well...
Do you not understand
the meaning of 5 to 7?
Was my confusion about 5 to 7
somehow unclear
because I thought I was
very clear about my confusion.
I thought you were kidding.
No. No.
I was actually confused.
And what did you think
I meant when I said
I was only free at those hours?
I thought you had
a very busy schedule
or you were unprepared
to spend the later
and definitionally sexier hour
with someone you hardly knew.
Oh... it was a code.
A code.
Un cinq a sept,
uh, a 5 to 7 relationship
is a relationship
outside of marriage.
Seriously the French actually
block out time for that?
No.
1 to 3 lunch,
3 to 5 conference call.
5 to 7 commit adultery.
Look...
Do you set aside time
to break other commandments?
Do you covet at 9:30? Worship
false idols from 10 to noon?
It's not literal.
It's an expression.
It re... refers to a time
in the evening
where a person's whereabouts
might naturally be
a little hazy.
Okay, I have a very good
French dictionary
and that is definitely
not in there.
No, it wouldn't be.
Now, back in the day
such things did tend to happen
from 5 to 7, I think.
But these days,
they happen all the time
but my husband and I,
we have found that..
...the original hours
work very well.
They provide a set window
and... clear boundaries.
I guess, that makes us
old-fashioned.
Yes, entirely.
So, your husband does this too?
He has a mistress.
Her name is Jane.
And you know her?
From time to time,
I see her at social functions.
Well, nothing
is ever flaunted
and so, no one
is ever embarrassed.
And everyone is okay
with everyone.
This is how
we've chosen to live.
One day, I will stand
next to her at his funeral.
Is that gonna
be anytime soon?
I am sure what I'm saying
sounds terribly tawdry
and hedonistic.
A little.
Well, it isn't.
We have our reasons
for the choices we've made.
Do you have children?
Two. Would you
like to see pictures?
Yes.
Marc is 7
and Elodie is 6.
They're beautiful.
Thank you.
They are the lights of my life.
You're really thrown
by all this, aren't you?
I, uh, yes. Uh-huh.
I must say that in my culture
it's not judged so harshly.
Okay, but we're not
in your culture.
We're in my culture
and in my culture
if we didn't have things
to judge harshly
we wouldn't know
what to do all day.
Well, maybe your culture
needs to grow.
Maybe there are other ways
to look at life.
Maybe there are some people
you marry
and people you love.
Arielle, you're older
than I am, you're wiser I'm sure
and you've seen much more
of the world.
And you're beautiful,
and elegant
and smart, and funny
and interesting
and you feel like family,
which is wonderful.
Are you seriously telling me
that a but is coming
at the end of the sentence?
Yes, but... being with you
would be... an affair
and to me..
...not ethical.
Unethical.
Not good... ethically.
I must respect your ethics
if I ask you to respect mine.
Should you change your mind,
I will continue to be out there
smoking nook on Fridays.
But if I never see you again
do know that..
...I will always remember you
very fondly.
Are you okay?
I'm sad.
It was the beginning.
Of what?
Belief.
The following Friday
right about after lunchtime
the pace of work began to slow.
I knew where she was and it was
all I could think about.
By the Friday after that..
Well, look,
French girls just aren't good
for your work habits.
And it killed me..
...that she was lighting
her own cigarette.
By the Friday after that..
I can't believe
it took you 3 weeks.
Sorry.
So... what happens now?
Room 2117, 5 o'clock.
Use your key.
How are you?
Very well. Thank you.
And you?
Very well.
Will you have some champagne?
Please.
Always look the person in
the eye when you touch glasses.
I know.
7 years of bad luck.
Bad luck?
That's the American version?
Yes. What's the French?
7 years of bad sex.
Good Lord.
I think that
tells you everything
you need to know
about our two cultures.
Yes. Yours is
very optimistic.
I mean, a lot of people after,
like, year 5 of bad sex
they'd give up, but you guys
really hang in there.
It's admirable.
Thank you.
At any rate, best to look
the other person in the eye.
Yes.
Are you nervous?
Oh, no.
I do this all the time.
I am.
What?
Nervous.
I am nervous around you.
That's ridiculous.
Good nervous,
I mean, uh, like a girl.
Well, you don't show it.
I should hope not.
Sometimes life
is... really something.
Maybe you should write
fortune cookies.
Are you alright?
I was just thinking
I never did a semester
abroad in college and I..
...really regret that now.
It was completely different.
From your expectations?
From the past.
Good.
Because I was about to say
the same.
Really?
Wow. Good for me.
Just so you know,
you're a natural lover.
Your body expresses beautifully
what's in your heart.
I'm just gonna write
that down.
Have none of the other women
you've been with
told you these things?
Uh, no.
Wow. Good for me.
How do you do that?
What?
Look like that,
in 30 seconds.
Do you have to go?
There's a fundraiser
at my children's school.
Please don't take this
the wrong way
but it suddenly seems..
...impossible to me
that you have that life.
I don't take it
the wrong way.
Actually, it seems impossible
to me too.
It will until the moment
I next see my children.
I did wanna ask you
something, if you don't mind.
What you said about belief..
...what did you mean?
Can you say more?
It's almost 7.
Will I see you tomorrow?
No. Monday.
5. The same room.
Hold on to the key.
Trust me.
Say, "Till then, then"
like you did that time.
Till then, then.
I like that.
I was way, way
too happy to write.
It was not a good weekend
for the Venetian wines.
Can no American watch
a film without popcorn?
That's right.
Do you chomp popcorn
when you read literature?
I eat sunflower seeds
and I spit the shells
into a little cup.
I cannot kiss you
goodbye outdoors.
I understand.
People can see us together.
That is permitted.
I can take your arm,
but we cannot kiss.
If those are the rules...
those are the rules.
Between the hours
of 7 and 5
I made a study
of French culture.
They seemed to be,
uh, strange people.
But then, I'm sure she thought
my people were strange too.
So I lost my virginity
on Passover.
Passover?
Yeah. Do you know what that is?
I don't know what you..
No, what does that mean?
It's a Jewish holiday.
Yeah?
Where you eat matzah,
which is unleavened bread.
Strange.
Yeah.
How was it?
Yeah. You mean the matzah?
Or my... the loss of my virginity?
The matzah, of course.
The matzah.
Yeah. Now the matzah was great.
It, matzah doesn't really
change over the years.
Sometimes
our two-hour interludes
were calm and prosaic.
Oh, no.
What?
I have some troubling news.
What?
I don't think the boat
we're controlling is our boat.
Are you..
What?
Are you kidding me?
No.
Where is our boat?
I have no idea.
Sometimes they were not
so calm.
Mmm, mmm.
Brian.
Yes?
Please join me.
By all means, bring your food.
Sh..
Mm-hmm.
Hello, I'm Arielle's
husband, Valery.
Enchante.
Enchante.
Please forgive any
hot dog related moisture.
Only if you will forgive
my intrusion.
I...I thought we should meet.
Arielle speaks
very highly of you.
She does?
To you?
Mm-hmm.
She says you're
a very fine person.
Funny, naturally charming
sincere,
extremely bright, kind.
She suspects
you're very talented.
Thank you.
I'm very happy that
she has met you, Brian.
For the little time
since she has known you
I have seen a light in her eyes
that I had never seen before.
And I'm so very glad of it.
I wish to thank you.
You're welcome.
I would be pleased if you
cared to join us at our home
this coming Saturday for supper.
Really?
Yes.
Is there any chance that
this is a gentlemanly ploy
designed to relax me
before your driver turns around
and impales me
with a fleur-de-lis?
None.
Well, then..
...I thank you
for the invitation
and I look forward to attending.
Good.
173 East 77th.
7:30?
How did he find out? Was it
a credit card bill or something?
I told him.
I beg your pardon?
With great joy.
You just volunteered it?
Of course.
Why?
Because he's my husband.
Uh-huh. And did you know
about this invitation?
No. I'm not
surprised though.
Valery does lovely things
like this.
How is this a lovely thing?
To me, this is a wildly,
wildly awkward thing.
I don't know
what he has in mind.
You must understand,
this is between you and him.
You have your own
relationship now.
We do?
If you want it.
I highly recommend it
to you, by the way.
You will come to treasure
his friendship.
He's that sort of person.
And somehow Saturday night will
be thoughtful and wonderful.
You'll see.
You don't understand
things yet, do you?
Uh, no.
I feel guilty.
Why would you feel guilty
if he's happy for us?
Because I don't
understand things yet.
Put aside your notions
about how people are, Brian.
The world will surprise you
with its grace if you let it.
Unclasp me?
Brian Bloom.
I believe I'm expected.
What? Don't say that.
Brian Bloom. Invited guest.
No, no, that's silly.
Hi. Uh, Brian Bloom
reporting for dinner.
Please come in.
Thanks.
Oh. Hello.
Good evening.
May I take your coat?
Uh, sure.
Thank you.
Right this way
for the elevator.
Elevator?
Good evening,
and welcome to our home.
Thank you.
Brian. Come in. Come in.
Glad you're here.
Your children are amazing.
Ha ha, thank you.
Are they real or are
they from a catalogue?
Uh, they are
from a catalogue.
Come and meet some people.
Everyone, this is our
dear friend, Brian Bloom
who also happens to be one of
the most talented young writers.
Brian, do you know
Maestro Alan Gilbert?
Pleasure.
It's a great pleasure, maestro.
Mr. Julian Bond.
True honor, sir.
Delighted.
And Mr. Daniel Boulud.
A pleasure.
I look forward to one day
being able to afford
to eat in one
of your restaurants, sir.
Nonsense. Nonsense.
I'll give you my card later.
And I'll tell Kareem to take
very good care of you.
And this is our friend,
Jane Hastings.
How do you do?
Nice to meet you.
Now, Jane is an editor
at Farrar, Strauss and Giroux
and perhaps this is the first
of many handshakes
between you two.
Ah, you're here.
Ladies and gentlemen,
three of my favorite words.
Dinner is served.
This way, please.
You, maestro, though immortal
are not a God but a man.
We know God can be kind.
He can be joyful.
But we also know
He can be annoying.
What kind of a God
is that now, maestro?
I've listened to my
own recordings at times
and wanted to kill everything in
the room, myself, the composer.
Even if the composer is dead.
Ah, and at those times,
He can be vengeful?
Oh, yes.
Not if we're made
strictly in His image.
Exactly.
Goodnight, maestro.
Enough already
with the maestro.
He seemed to like it.
I'm kidding.
So tonight actually
happened you're saying.
You'll get used to it.
Julian Bond
sure didn't eat much.
He's just very polite.
Oh, God, should I not have
had seconds on the little hens?
It was fine.
Alan Gilbert had seconds.
It was fine. Don't worry.
Split it?
Sure.
You seem to know
the ropes very well.
Have you been with
Valery for a while?
A year.
Could I ask you something?
Do you ever think to yourself
"What the heck am I doing?
This is crazy."
No.
Well, then would you tell me
what the heck am I doing?
Because this is crazy.
You're being happy.
Just like I am.
But don't you want
a relationship with a future?
I'm 25 years old.
There's plenty of time
for a future.
I guess.
Life is a collection
of moments.
The idea is to have as
many good ones as you can.
See, I was taught that
there are no free lunches.
That one day the rent comes due,
the other shoe drops
and you suffer a thousand-fold.
Who raised you?
Jews.
Look, if you wanna be
a good writer
then you can't have
a mediocre life.
I'll give you
a baseball metaphor
because Jewish writers
love them.
Swing from the heels.
Okay, Brian Bloom?
Okay.
I look forward to
the next time we see each other.
And to the evolution
of your attitudes.
You are a natural editor.
Where did this idea
come from?
Oh, you know, I'm just trying
to... swing from the heels.
Oh, I'm so sorry I'm late.
Ah, no worries... mom.
Ariel.
Arielle, mom.
Arlene Bloom. How do you do?
Enchante.
Where's dad?
Parking.
This neighborhood
is a nightmare.
There are plenty of garages.
Have you forgotten
who we're dealing with?
Dad refuses
to pay for parking.
He says it's highway robbery.
And he's absolutely right.
Brian, would you ask
the waiter
if they have a different chair?
Sorry?
My back is killing me.
Uh, I think all the chairs
are pretty much the same.
Oh, excuse me.
Could I trouble you for a different chair?
Excuse me?
Something with better back support.
I'm afraid we don't
have any other chair.
No folding chairs
in the back?
Mm, I don't think
we have any.
It's fine. I'll stand.
You'll stand?
It's fine.
It's highway robbery
parking in this burg.
Hi, dad.
Hiya, pal.
I finally had to say "Oncle"
and put it in a garage.
Your mother is standing.
I know.
They have no
folding chairs here.
It's The Carlyle, Arlene.
You know when we first met,
she only sent back entrees.
Now it's chairs.
Dad, may I introduce
Arielle Pierpont?
Enchante.
Oh, no.
I am the one who is enchanted.
That's right.
I studied your language.
Dad, the meaning
of the verb, "baiser"
which used to mean to kiss has
changed a bit over the years.
It has?
Yes.
What does it mean now?
It means to fuck.
Oh, God.
Pardon my French.
Not at all.
Seriously though, $42
for 2 hours plus tip
and then on top of that,
after this, we have to drive
all the way across town
to another parking lot
We're seeing
"The Book Of Mormon."
Not the original
cast... but still.
Yeah.
It's the replacement Mormons.
You know it actually might be
less expensive if we leave
the car in the East Side,
then we take a taxi
to the theater and back.
Maybe could we strategize
later on the parking?
What can I get for you?
Table water for me, please.
Flat or sparkling?
No, just table water.
Tap water?
Yes.
With ice?
Yes.
I think I'm gonna have
a vodka martini.
You'll be passed out
by intermission
and I'll have to sing the second
act in the car on the way home.
I would drink, but I may
have to drive across town.
Yes. You've mentioned that.
Vodka martini
sounds wonderful.
One for me too, please.
You think we'll even find a cab?
With a syringe, if you would.
Tout de suite.
Merci.
So, first of all,
did you ever hear anybody
speak better school-taught
French than this kid?
99 on the Regents Exam.
And he knows
the current usage.
And this is within
his whole life
not one day out of the country.
Something of which
I'm very proud.
So, it's nice
the schedule worked out.
Brian says you're only free
till 7.
That's right.
So, Arielle
of whom my son
speaks in golden tones
tell us about yourself.
Well, I am 33, married,
and the mother of two.
Waiter.
Canadian Club.
A married French woman
33 years of age,
with two children.
You could stop that sentence
anywhere along the way
and have reason enough
not to be in the relationship.
Dad...
These are the same French
who didn't let us
fly over their country
on the way to Khadafi.
Okay, but it's not
her Frenchness
that's really bothering you...
No, but I can't discuss
her marital or parental status
because if I do,
my pancreas will explode.
So instead, I'm dwelling
on the relatively benign
but still objectionable issue
of her Frenchness.
Okay.
In the war, the French
couldn't wait
to give up their Jews.
Nobody could
wait to give up...
Also, they surrendered
3 times in the same war.
Have you any idea
how hard that is to do?
What does that have
to do with anything?
Because this is who
you're dealing with.
Mimi and Joe Fabercamp
went to Paris for their 25th
and they said, "It was
a festival of rudeness."
And Joe even had a phrase book.
And his cousin, once removed
was at Omaha Beach,
unbelievable in gratitude.
$42, please.
Jesus Christ.
I really hope you know
what you're doing, my boy.
I really hope this does not turn
out to be one of those decisions
that takes a perfectly good life
and turns it for the worse.
It won't.
Now what the hell
is going on over there?
Look at that, dad.
She fucked her twice.
Arlene... you wanna
weigh in, please
on the subject of la femme
Robinson over there?
Or are you just gonna
leave your husband
to fight this battle himself?
Just like that time
at karaoke night
when you dropped the microphone,
walked off and left me
because you couldn't read the
lyrics to "It Had To Be You."
It's good you've let that go.
I think that there
are two forces on Earth
you never want to be fighting.
One is Mother Nature.
The other is love.
What?
She's lovely.
It's not an ideal situation
but she adores my son.
Now how can you be
a sensible parent
and not feel warmly towards
someone who adores your child?
That is
practically... anti-social.
Okay. So I'm anti-social.
Not news.
Besides, I'm not telling
you that I don't like her.
I hardly know her.
Exactly.
I hope you don't mind, Bri,
but Arielle gave me her number.
We're gonna go shopping
and she's gonna teach me
how to walk like her.
I cannot tell you how little
I wanna see a Broadway
show right now.
It's one of two things...
or possibly both.
What is?
Either no one is immune
to your charms..
...or the world really can
surprise you with its grace.
What?
Je t'aime.
Just for the record.
Okay, we'll start
very simply.
Taste, please, this glass.
Is it white or red?
Red.
My, God.
Ah! Really?
You gotta be shitting me.
You have the palate
of a water buffalo.
That is about to change.
Replace the blindfold, please.
Take a small piece of baguette
to cleanse the palate.
Okay. Please
drink from this glass.
Is it the Miller High Life
or the Guinness stout?
The Miller High Life.
Oh, boy.
What? Merde!
We have a lot of work to do.
I was sure it was
Miller High Life.
Now please take
a buffalo chicken wing
to obliterate the palate.
No, I was not very
like, I had, like,
big glasses for my sight.
And I was not very...
attractive actually.
I find that very hard
to believe.
Yeah?
Yes.
I like it that you
find that very... ha ha ha..
I find that
incredibly difficult..
...to believe.
That was very adventurous.
It was?
Yes, in my culture we wait
a long time, maybe even years
before we do...
something like that.
Well, consider it
a cultural exchange.
Can we do that again?
One day when
you're a famous writer
all these people
will know your name.
I don't think I want
that guy to know my name.
You will have no choice.
Why is it that you're so much
sure of me than I am of myself?
Maybe I've seen the future.
Thanks.
Excuse me.
It's you.
Our nanny has
a respiratory infection.
Uh-oh.
Valery and I
have a state luncheon.
Is that better or worse
than a respiratory infection?
I can't miss it and the
children cannot be left alone.
Pas de probleme.
I have an idea.
I don't care if you're French.
If you're going to live here,
there are certain things
that you're going to
have to know how to do.
And none of them..
...none..
...is more important..
...than hitting a baseball.
Okay? Elodie, keep
your back elbow up.
Keep your eyes on the ball
and above all..
Don't lunge.
Exactly.
Ne lunge pas.
Here we go.
Oh! Oh, no, are you okay?
No, I ain't hurt.
It didn't hurt.
What do we call that?
Chin music.
Exactly.
When it comes for you, you gotta
get out of the way, you know.
Alright. Next pitch.
Do not be afraid of the ball.
If it's coming for your head,
get out of the way.
But otherwise, be afraid
of being afraid of the ball.
That's the American way.
Now, hit me in the nose with it.
Okay? Right in the nose.
Oh! That was great.
Yay! Yay!
That was great!
Come here.
Throw me in the air again.
Yes!
Three more.
Two more.
One.
Brian.
Yes.
I'm so glad that
you're my mother's boyfriend.
Me too. We are very, very
happy to have you in the family.
Thank you.
My turn to bat!
My turn to bat!
Yes. Okay.
Uh, give your sister the... what
do we call the catching gear?
The tools of ignorance.
Exactly.
The tools... of ignorance.
Alright, guys,
are you ready?
What have I missed?
Well, let's see.
Your daughter is Derek Jeter.
And your son is David Ortiz.
I don't know
what you're saying to me.
Never mind.
Just watch this.
Okay.
Don't close that stance.
Very good.
I wanna see
your front hip, okay?
Elodie, how about
some infield chatter?
Oh!
Big Papi!
I'm so proud of you.
I'm so proud of you.
$6000 and they publish
your story.
The story about the dogs.
The story about the dogs.
Which you now regret mocking,
don't you?
No, that just proves that
if you have enough talent
you can write about complete
bullshit and still fool people.
But I'm so proud of you.
You know there's a ceremony.
There's a ceremony?
Will you come?
It won't be between
5 and 7?
No.
Can we break the rules?
We can't break them.
I understand.
So we will just have
to work within them.
What does that mean?
It means that
no force on earth
would keep me away that night.
Your future is starting.
One of the best parts
of my job is reading new writers
and occasionally,
even publishing them.
The fact is, talent happens
when it happens
and you have to be there
when it does.
Tonight, I'm delighted
to introduce
6 extraordinary voices.
New writers
for only a moment longer.
Proceeding then
in that ever-egalitarian thing
called alphabetical order.
In her story,
"Kupchino Station"
Diane Altschuler
brings to life
the Leningrad
of the early 1980s.
A city still bearing
the physical scars
of the Second World War
and now feeling the full
stifling effect
of President Jimmy Carter's
grain embargo.
Elainee, a refusenik
the character is based
on the author's mother
earns a small hourly fee
standing in line
on behalf of
a wealthy neighbor to buy...
I'm not comfortable.
Shh.
It's the husband.
She brings the husband?
Dad, please.
I'm sorry.
But I feel I should
get mad at somebody.
Only I'm not sure who.
We'll discuss it after.
All I'm saying
is that civilization
is organized by couples...
for better or worse.
Frequently worse, I grant you.
But there's a reason for it
which is that
it's not confusing.
I'm begging you.
Are you saying
you disagree with me?
Would you for Christ's sake
watch your son's finest hour?
Brian Bloom's story,
"Run From Becky"
is about a forbidden liaison
between two Westminster
best-in-breeds.
One, a German Shepherd
and the other
a Nova Scotia
Duck Tolling Retriever.
I have been reading
your magazine since my parents
got me a subscription
when I went away to college.
That makes me very proud.
Thank you.
And a copy of the "New
Yorker's View Of The World"
cover hangs in
our guest bathroom.
A lovely tribute and soon your
son's story will hang right beside it.
Oh, no. It's gonna hang
in the living room.
Of course. Of course.
But if he keeps writing
the way he is now
he's gonna fill every wall
in the house.
That's very kind.
You are a very nice man.
Thank you.
I thought
you were gonna be gruffer.
Didn't you think
he'd be gruffer?
I was expecting a real SOB.
Okay, then.
Can I borrow the two of you
for just one moment?
Yes.
Excuse us?
The all-important
schmoozefest.
Go. Do.
Nice save.
So I assume you'll be rescinding
the award now.
What? You think
I don't have parents?
Besides, everything I said
to you was true.
All the winning stories
were terrific
but yours carried with it,
I don't know..
...the tease of greatness.
Make of it what you will.
Thank you.
We'll see each other again.
Golly.
Golly?
You are a person
who says, "Golly?"
It just came out.
First time in my life.
Okay.
Listen, fast and close.
Come here.
Okay. My boss is upstairs
at the reception.
He wants to meet you.
He read your story
or at least, half of it.
He loved it.
He... he said
it was a little episodic
which only means he read it
in several sittings.
He loves your voice. Loves!
He wants you to start a novel.
He wants to publish you.
He... he never says that.
He hates everything.
He just wants to meet you
for one minute first
and make sure that
you're not a lunatic...
What the hell is wrong with you?
She brought Valery.
Of course, she did.
Rules are rules.
So this shouldn't bother me?
It doesn't bother you at all?
To see them here, on a night
like this, in your world...
Okay. Get your head right.
Get your head right right now
because you're about to have
the most important conversation
of your life.
And it's not just
your future here.
It's mine too.
So can you do it?
Can you put the French lady out
of your mind for 9 seconds?
Please.
Just stick out your hand.
Say, "How do you do, sir?"
like a normal human being
so you can have the career
that you have always dreamed of
or are you just gonna blow it
and incinerate
and dissolve like a Kleenex
in a fat man's sneeze?
Is... is your head right?
Is your head right?
Is... your head... right?
You are much crazier
than I am.
Is your head right?
Yes. Yes.
My head is right.
Okay.
Okay.
"How do you do, sir?"
That's all you have to say.
"How do you do, sir?
How do you do, sir?"
"How do you do, sir?
How do you do, sir?"
Brian Bloom, I would like you
to meet Jonathan Galassi.
Our publisher.
How do you do, sir?
Did Jane tell you
to say that?
Yes. She did, sir.
Well... over the coming years
I want you to do
almost everything she says.
I'm pretty sure I already do.
I can't wait to read
what you write when..
...you've got something
to write about.
On that day
I'll be honored
to publish you.
The honor will be all mine.
Uh, that is my happy noise.
I don't mean to meddle,
but you don't stop
being a parent just because
your son's name is in the paper.
I appreciate that, dad.
Sam, he will figure it out.
Can I finish
this conversation?
You have finished it 8 times.
In 30 years,
I don't remember once
ever being able
to finish a sentence.
Well, with your subjects,
you don't deserve predicate.
Oh. What is that?
A grammar insult.
A syntax barb.
Not everyone is as lucky
as we were, alright?
Not everyone has it simple.
I know that.
Do you remember
how sure we were?
And how quickly
and how little was in our way?
Do you remember
what you said to me
after the very fist time
we had intercourse?
Are you hungry?
Before that.
Yes. I remember.
I should go.
Why are we leaving you here?
I'd like to walk.
Why?
There's a lot to think about.
You could get mugged.
By who?
An exhausted office worker?
Arlene,
your son is a madman.
Because he walks?
You should try it.
I'm really glad
you guys came tonight.
Thank you.
Listen to me,
I couldn't be prouder.
Me too, son.
Honestly.
We are now officially
spending that law school money.
Half of it.
I love you both.
Please drive home safely, okay?
We'll give you two and half
rings when we reach.
Alright.
The GW or the Tappan Zee?
At this hour?
Hello.
I need your help
with jewelry.
I beg your pardon.
What jewelry stores
does Arielle respect?
It's midnight.
Yes.
Why are you asking me this?
Because I'm spotty
on women's accessories.
Why are you
buying her jewelry?
Do I have to say?
You're gonna be my writer.
I'm going to be your editor.
We're going to have
this kind of relationship.
What kind of relationship?
The kind where you call me
in the middle of the night
asking me crazy questions
and I talk you off the ledge.
Could you please just tell me
where to shop for her?
What genre of jewelry?
There are genres?
Fun or important?
Important.
You can't afford important.
As important as I can afford.
Give me a dollar figure.
$6000, including tax.
Dior.
Okie-dokie, then.
I'm gonna get
some sleep now, okay?
I knew you'd know.
I wish it were
tomorrow at 5.
Can you stay
for another moment?
There's something I wanna say.
Of course.
I would like
to be a good writer.
And tell stories that mean
something to people.
But the only thing..
...I really want in this world..
...is to be the man
who walks beside you.
You do walk beside me.
Not just from 5 to 7.
It's not enough.
Not nearly.
Marry me, Arielle.
I wanna be your husband.
And stepfather to your children
and if you wish it
I want us to have
children together.
I am already married.
I know.
And that's why this is not
a conventional engagement ring.
That and the fact that
a conventional engagement ring
will require
a somewhat more
robust conquest
of the marketplace.
You know the situation.
I do.
You know the rules.
I do and I can
no longer play by them.
We had a trust
that you have now broken.
I know.
And I can't help it.
I've found the person
I wanna spend my life with.
That is a drive much stronger
than any set of rules
or any doubts about the meaning
and purpose of marriage.
Of course, if your... feelings
aren't as strong as mine
then... I completely understand.
They are.
You know that they are.
They are.
From the first moment.
You really think you're ready
to be a stepfather?
I know I am.
You will be growing up
in a very big hurry
skipping your young adulthood.
Frankly, it's overrated.
Regular adulthood
seems much better.
I'm 9 years
older than you.
I don't care.
When you're 34,
I will be 43.
Women are at their
most beautiful in their 40s.
Okay. That's true.
But 10 years after
that I'll be 53.
At which point I will believe that women
are at their most beautiful in their 50s.
Oh, and 10 years after that?
What are we doing, sums now?
No.
Do you believe that keeping
a marriage together
is always best
for the children?
If I believed that..
...I wouldn't be asking
you to do this.
But if you believe it,
then... you have to say no.
This is complicated.
This is very... very complicated.
It's not.
I mean, yes, it is.
Of course, it is,
but at the same time
it's very simple.
What are we willing
to do for love?
How did you know the size?
I described your hands
to the salesman.
Are you saying yes?
Meet me here tomorrow.
I'll bring a suitcase.
We will live here
for the first little while.
I will tell Valery tonight.
I will not be able to call you.
Just..
...be here... tomorrow.
At 5.
At 4.
At 4?
There are no rules anymore.
Yes?
It's Valery.
Let me in, please.
Apartment 3C.
Please come in.
Thank you.
Would you like something?
I have, um...
We had an understanding.
A clear, honorable
and tacitly acknowledged
set of boundaries.
I know.
I have welcomed you
into my family
under a certain aegis
and now you have betrayed
everyone involved.
I had no choice.
Are you certain
you know what you're doing?
Yes.
I'm sorry.
I meant no injury.
I know.
I'm sure that if the roles
had been reversed
I would've done the same.
See to her.
Mr. Bloom.
Yes?
Madam Pierpont
was here earlier.
She asked me
to give this to you.
I started working
when I was 11.
By 25, I could feel the end
of my career coming.
I thought, "What happens now?"
"What will be my life?"
I was terrified.
And so I made
an error of youth.
Some of the girls were lucky.
They had fallen in love,
but not me. Not once.
Even though I had been
all over the world
and I had met everyone.
That spring, I was introduced
to Valery.
He was then just as he is now.
Solid. Substantial.
And good.
"The salt of the Earth,"
as American like to say.
I felt a great affection
for him.
A great respect.
That is a kind of love.
I thought it was the only kind
I would ever know.
I didn't believe enough.
I didn't believe in love.
8 years later
I discovered that
I should have.
It has stunned me,
this new happiness
which came out of nowhere.
This secret door
that has opened in me.
I have never felt so alive..
...as when I am in your arms.
It is tempting, so tempting
to forget about everything
and just accept this gift.
But I cannot.
And not because I don't believe
that you would be a marvelous
stepfather to Marc and Elodie.
And a wonderful father
to the children
we might have had together.
Not because of lifestyle
or the difference in our ages
or the opinions of others.
When Valery and I married,
we wrote our own vows.
He has always kept his promise
and I feel I must keep mine.
But it's more
than a matter of honor.
One day, Brian,
when you have children
you'll understand that to leave
them is to leave yourself.
And to injure them,
unthinkable.
I told you,
I'm an old-fashioned girl.
Please do not try
to contact me.
It will not change anything.
I am so sad to say goodbye.
To be parted.
I can't believe it, really.
We had so many adventures
still ahead of us.
Maybe... if we had had more time
I would have found
something about you
I didn't like,
really couldn't stand
which would be very useful
right now.
But I doubt it.
They say that
no love is perfect.
But then, they never met you.
Arielle.
Let me help.
No, it's okay.
But if I may impose
for a favor?
Sir.
Please give this
to Madam Pierpont
when she comes
for lunch on Friday.
Certainly, sir.
Thank you.
I did as she asked.
I didn't try to contact her.
I stayed out of
her neighborhood.
I never returned
to the St. Regis.
If my route was
to take me near it
I would go a couple of blocks
out of my way.
Yes?
It's just me. Jane.
How is she?
I have no idea.
What do you mean?
I ended it with Valery.
Why?
Because there is a certain
sadness to it now.
Because being around him
and around her
feels like I'm betraying
my friendship with you.
You're not.
Not anymore.
And because..
...the future has a way
of arriving
whether you want it to or not.
Eat something.
Smoke less.
Call me.
We'll go to the movies.
Something from
a big American studio.
As little as you want
to write when you're happy
that's how much you have to
write when you're miserable.
Your passions
have to go somewhere
and this is
the only place left.
Your suffering has to be
good for something.
It's not for me to say if
the words were worth the price.
What are you doing?
Where are we going?
Just wait a minute.
Smile, you asshole. Smile.
Come on. Come on,
we're celebrating.
Thousands of years ago
somebody came up with
the notion of impermanence.
Of the beauty
and inevitability of change.
I'm pretty sure
they had just been dumped.
I had a long time to consider
the value of memory.
And the idea that just because
something doesn't last forever
doesn't mean
its worth is diminished.
Maybe it was just
a rationalization.
Easier on the soul than
mourning what might have been.
A life unlived.
I honestly don't know.
But I chose
to believe in memory.
I chose to believe in her.
I chose to believe
that the bond was never broken
and that we carried each other
in our hearts.
As a secret singularity.
She made me a writer.
She made me a man.
There would be other loves,
even great loves.
But she was right.
Only one remained perfect.
I'm gonna get a kick
out of that.
Carol tells me that she's
she's deciding to take
her work vacation.
Which she has.
Of course she has.
And as a result,
it never quite left me alone.
...like, you have to try...
I wondered if it remained
perfect for her as well.
Or if I was just
holding onto an idea.
Some questions
have to go unanswered.
But in New York, you're never
more than 20 feet away
from someone you know
or someone you were
meant to know.
Hi.
Hi.
Brian, lovely to see you.
Valery, how are you?
Nice to see you.
This is Kiva.
How are you?
Hello, I'm Valery.
Nice to meet you.
And you.
Very nice to meet you.
Marc.
And our children,
Marc and Elodie.
And?
This is Charlie Bloom.
Hi, Charlie.
Wanna say hi, Charlie?
Hello, Charlie.
He's two, right?
Yeah, he's... he is two.
Not talking much yet.
I loved "The Mermaid."
Oh, yes, so did I. And I must
say, all of your books.
Yes, we read you religiously
in our home.
Thank you.
I'm very glad about that.
Tell me, how... how is Jane?
Jane is brilliant.
Jane is Jane.
She is married.
She met a very good guy,
a cellist.
And they have a son.
Oh, that's wonderful.
And tell me, Mrs. Bloom,
apart from being the mother
of this beautiful..
Brian.
Take care...
Take care. Bye-bye.
So nice to meet you.
Bye.
I don't know
if I'll ever see her again.
I don't know
if that's a good thing
or a bad one.
But I will promise you this.
Your favorite story,
whatever it might be
was written for one reader.