A Warrior's Tail (2015)

1
[static]
[whirring]
[music]
[tribal music]
NARRATOR: Once upon a time,
there was a great warrior.
Though young in years,
his was an old, powerful soul.
And he was all that stood
between his people,
and total destruction.
The village enemies
come from far and wide,
but they don't suspect
the white wolves have returned!
[howls]
[tribal shout]
In olden days,
the forest surrounding our village
was inhabited by great white wolves.
MOTHER: Why are you still awake?
SAVVA: I'm watching the storm.
Why did the white wolves attack man?
MOTHER:
Savva, you know the story.
I've told you a thousand times.
SAVVA: But where did they go,
and why did they all disappear?
MOTHER: No one knows.
The wolves and humans had close ties.
They were our protectors.
Legend says that a great magician
punished them for turning on us
by changing them into horrid beasts,
which they would remain until
the day a knight would come
to save the world entire.
Why do you say it like that?
"Saving the world entire?"
It sounds weird.
The legends are often told in poetry.
But can one knight really do that?
Save the whole world?
Of course he can.
A person can do anything,
but only if you truly wish for it
with all of your heart.
[distant barking]
[barking continues]
Mom, is something wrong?
No. I just thought...
[thunder]
They're here.
[tense music]
Hurry. Down you go.
I want to stay with you!
Do as I say. Now, Savva!
[gasps]
All alone then, sweetie?
Yes, I'm alone.
Everyone is to gather
in the square. Now!
[evil laughter]
After we're done feeding
on your harvest,
we're taking you to Mom!
She'll pay handsomely for new slaves
to toil through the winter.
[laughs]
Bring us the harvest!
Make sure you haven't hidden any away!
Or we'll eat you instead!
[laughs]
[snoring]
[snoring continues]
Hey, where is my mom?
Savva, what are you doing?
I told you to stay hidden.
I'm gonna get you out, Mom.
Go back to the cellar. Please!
This cage must have a weakness.
Hmm...
How could I break it?
No!
[snarling]
I'll get you out, Mom.
Get that boy!
Get him.
[intense music]
[panting]
[gasps]
[sniffing]
I can feel he's close.
Where, where, where, where, where?
There!
[twig snaps]
[screams]
He's there!
Oh, no.
Get him, get him, get him, get him!
No, no, no, no!
[screams]
This isn't happening.
It's a dream.
[horror music]
Hello!
[evil laughter]
You have nowhere to run.
Got you, little bug!
Yeah!
Got you!
Get away from me!
[evil laughter]
[distant howling]
[growling]
Is that...
That's not possible.
[howling]
Is that him?
That's him, is it?
That's him! That's him! That's him!
[screaming]
What are you doing so far away
from the village, boy?
My shoulder... hurts so bad.
[birds chirping]
[groans]
Wow.
That was the weirdest dream.
- Hungry, boy?
- Aah!
You really exist?
I'd like to think so.
I put your shoulder
back in place for you.
But you're a white wolf!
Are you gonna eat me?
Not today.
I can... I can go?
Of course. Where will you go?
I have to save my village
from the hyenas.
Hyenas.
Can I ask you something?
If there's still
white wolves in the forest,
why don't they protect our village?
Because I'm the only one left.
How do you plan to save
your village, boy?
No idea.
All I know is you can do anything
if you wish for it with all your heart.
What's your name?
Savva.
I'm Anggee.
I may know someone who can help you.
I don't get it.
Why can't we just eat them?
Moron! That stinking Monkey queen
has offered us a good deal
for these slaves.
You would eat our profit?
Ah!
[growls]
Are you trying to poison us?
No. I... I didn't see that in my pile.
Really, sweetheart?
Throw her in the hole!
Don't let them do this!
Stand up to them!
[screams]
You see that mountain?
At the very top lives a magician.
I am on my way to see him
for reasons of my own.
I believe there will be a warrior there
who can free your village.
So what are we waiting for? Let's go!
Not so fast.
We'll have to fight our way
through swamps
and treacherous jungle,
and when we reach the mountain,
we will still have
to get past Mom Jozee,
the three-headed Monkey queen.
Three-headed Monkey queen?
Really, you think I'm buying that? Huh!
She was once a normal Monkey.
But she was vain,
power-hungry and foolish.
In order to teach her a lesson,
the Magician split her into three parts,
one head for each weakness,
vanity, greed and stupidity.
She was so angry that she had
her army surround the mountain
and completely cut him off
from the outside world.
She doesn't let anyone see the Magician.
Well, how do we get through?
I guess we'll have to wish for it,
with all of our hearts.
What is that?
Oh, my friends! Are you here to save me?
Are you here to get me
out of this terrible forest?
What are you?
What are you?
I'm a boy.
What's your name, tiny one?
I think he means you.
Oh! My name.
Puffy. So where are we headed?
We?
You have to take me
out of this evil place!
Don't leave me here!
We're going to see the Magician
that lives on the mountain.
We should keep moving.
Well...
good luck, Puffy.
W-W-Wait!
Don't leave me!
You have to take me! I... I...
I am going to see the Magician too!
- You?
- Mm-hmm.
Why?
To break this hideous curse!
To return to my former glory
and shed this gruesome,
terrifying appearance.
What curse? What do you mean?
I am an enchanted prince.
Oh, please!
- It's true!
- Prove it!
[distant screeching]
- Monkeys.
- Monkeys?
Ohh...
[screeching]
I will have each and every one of you
flayed in the royal court!
[growling]
Unhand that man or face my wrath!
What?
[roars]
I'm not going anywhere!
Can't hide from Terminator!
Hi-yah!
Don't you dare touch my coat!
I see I'm going to have to
give you some fighting lessons.
Who are you?
My name is Savva. This is Anggee.
I am Semi-Baron Fafl.
I am no ordinary semi-baron.
I am an enchanted prince.
Of course you are.
Everyone in this forest
is an enchanted prince.
Ah, but I truly am.
Before this wretched curse,
women fought over me.
Literally, they fought in tournaments
with swords and spears.
They would beat each other with cudgels
just for the favor of my glance.
[farts]
Ohh!
Now that was a noble gesture.
Quiet, pink one! That was not me.
Not you? We all heard it.
It's not me!
He's telling the truth.
It was his passenger.
Oh, alas, I can not get rid of him.
The spell was cast upon the both of us
by a vile, angry witch.
She was in love with me,
as most girls are.
The mosquito bit her right on the nose.
It was quite hideous, red and bumpy.
Of course, I had no choice
but to spurn her.
Why, they used to fight over me!
Why can't you get rid of him?
[gasps]
I am doubly cursed.
First, this horrid appearance,
a curse which I do not know
how to break.
[screams]
And second, she doomed us
to be together forever.
The spell is very crafty.
It cannot be broken until...
we agree on something.
Isn't that tragic?
Why don't you just agree
to go your separate ways?
He is a mosquito!
I am a semi-baron!
It would be beneath my dignity
to even speak to him,
let alone agree on anything.
He is below my station.
And below our nostrils.
I am traveling to see the Magician
- who lives on the mountain.
- Savva, don't...
Hey, we're going to see
the Magician too!
Oh, great.
Then I will allow you
to travel by my side
as long as you stay two steps behind me.
And I am not responsible
for that abomination.
Aah!
I wonder if we know him.
Another dart.
Mom, you're the absolute best,
the cat's meow.
Your skills are gonna make us
the toast of the town.
Zee, ain't she marvelous?
[kissing]
Oh, I'm sorry, I was thinking.
I thought I smelled something burning.
What could you possibly
have been thinking about?
If more than one mouse is mice,
and if more than one louse is lice,
is more than one spouse...
Spice?
You're an idiot.
[gasps]
Oh!
And just what are you
staring at, darling?
Well, Ma, it's like this, see.
We built a trap in the woods
and waited for a sucker
to come along and fall in.
Finally this pigeon took the bait.
Bam! Right into the trap
like a blind alley cat.
That sentence needs
at least two more metaphors.
He was a hideous-looking fella,
with a mosquito riding on his shoulder
on a tiny little throne.
A mosquito on a throne?
On the level, Ma. No sooner were
we putting the screws to him
then these three palookas come
out of the woods and took us on.
Oh, I love a good fight story!
But here's the twist.
The first one out of the woods
was a white wolf.
A white wolf?
Have you been playing
in the hemp groves again?
It's the straight dope, Ma.
It's all jake.
He had a little boy with him too,
and a little pink dame.
And why do I care about this?
Because we stuck around the
woods, see, to drop some eaves.
We heard them say they're all on
their way to see the Magician.
What'd I miss?
Torpedoes! To me now!
I need you to do what you do best.
No! I don't mean chasing girls.
Tell us what to do, Mom.
I need you to spy.
I want you to know
every move the invaders make.
Every step they take. Is that clear?
[evil laughter]
Because after we're done
feeding on your harvest,
we're taking you to Mom.
[evil laughter]
[gasps]
[twig snaps]
Hello?
Anggee! I saw...
[fart]
- Oh, not again!
- What do you want?
The next time you feel one of
those coming on, warn us, okay?
Sorry, pal, but when I sleep,
I can't control myself.
Oh, yeah, sometimes I can't either.
Sometimes I swat bugs in my sleep.
My God! Where is the pink powder puff?
SAVVA: Puffy? Puffy!
ANGGEE: He's gone.
FAFL: That's gratitude for you.
You save him from the forest,
and he abandons you.
He didn't run off. Someone took him.
There are tracks. Look.
We have to go find him.
He could be in danger.
I am not going to risk my life
for six ounces of fluff.
We can't just leave him.
The semi-baron is right.
It's too dangerous. We should skedaddle.
Wait, wait.
Um...
No! The bug is wrong.
We must save the furball.
Mm-mm.
Poor Puffy.
He must be terrified.
[tribal music]
What's the racket, hmm? Eh?
Makatunga.
Makatunga.
[cheering]
Guys?
Someone want to tell me what's going on?
[cheering continues]
Oh, wow.
O great Makatunga!
Finally you have
revealed yourself to us!
We can fulfill our destiny now
on this buljoo we call earth.
They think I'm some Makatunga.
[clamoring]
What shall I do?
Ah!
Cloud!
Uh...
Makatunga will speak.
I will make it rain!
[humming]
[humming continues]
Come on, cloud.
[humming]
[humming]
Pour some rain
[humming]
A few drops will do
[humming]
Or I'll be their lunch today
[tribal music]
The swamp is sticky
and sometimes a little dark
Thank you, cloud.
And hard to get around
Now we have someone
who can make a paradise
[yawns]
Build a sweet, sweet swamp
Bring us some climate change
And build a spa resort
[continues music]
It's really creepy out here.
Yeah.
Swamp, swamp, swamp
Swamp, sweet swamp
Waaaah
Aaah!
Make the sun shine bright
O Makatunga Mama Makatunga
And turn it off at night
O Makatunga Mama Makatunga
Makatunga!
- [humming]
- Fafl!
- Sorry.
- [farts]
Excuse me.
Do it all
O Makatunga Ma Makatunga
[continues music]
[ends music]
Anggee, what are those?
I don't like the look of this.
My, it must be Halloween already.
These decorations are simply grand.
I must remember
to congratulate whoever...
What?
I suppose it is too much to hope
that these are just Halloween costumes?
I'll draw them away!
Whoa!
Come on, catch up!
[screams]
[screams]
Will you stop that shaking?
I am trying to have lunch here.
Shut it! I'm busy!
Cheers to you, Fafl.
Hope you don't get cut.
I got you!
[laughs]
What's the holdup, Fafl?
Go save the boy!
Anggee!
[drums beating]
Where are we?
Keep quiet. I've been here before.
[growling]
Savva, are you okay?
Yeah, I'm fine.
O great Makatunga.
We ask your guidance.
Come forward and give your word of law.
Should these trespassers
be allowed to live
or should they be put to a slow,
horrible, painful death?
[cheering]
Puffy?
I do not know this Puffy
of whom you speak.
I am Makatunga!
God of the Swamp People.
God?
You're not a God. You're...
A God. Definitely a God.
Wait, wait. Let me understand.
You people are being ruled
by a talking oven mitt?
O great Makatunga, what is your will?
Shall they live or shall they die?
You really have to think about it?
Kill them!
Just kidding, just kidding.
Let them live.
[laughs]
Stinker!
[gasps]
Rickies.
I hate those guys.
Why are they following our followees?
Somebody better go tell Mom.
Everyone! Be quiet!
I am sad today.
La-la-la...
Are you deaf?
I don't know who these people
that we're following,
but we're not the only ones interested.
The Rickies are following them too.
Rickies? What on earth?
Whatever their reasons are,
those Rickies never mean any good.
They must be as intrigued as we are
by the sudden appearance
of a white wolf.
Mom, you are so smart.
You make us all look like geniuses!
Gorgeous, ravishing geniuses!
Quiet! I need to think.
I've thought it over,
and the answer's no.
I'm definitely not deaf.
[whispers]
Shi-Sha.
Shi-Sha!
No.
Shaman Shi-Sha is my name.
Of course it is.
I was drinking to your health.
This here my granddaughter, Nanty.
Semi-baron Fafl at your service.
My name is Savva. This is Anggee.
Anggee and I old friends,
aren't we, cher?
[chuckles]
It held.
Yes. You still think
you can't do it for the others?
I don't have the strength.
I'm old and weak now.
What are you guys talking about?
Have you been watching us?
My Nanty have been watching
this li'l skinny mullet here.
Watching me? Why?
We are waiting for the one
with the heart of the warrior.
[laughing]
I'm afraid you are a scentless dog
hunting the wrong fox.
No offense.
I just wanted to pay my respects.
I can't hurt him. He's a God.
Hey! Puffy-tunga!
[gasps]
Savva!
I'm so happy! I missed you!
Come on, slip into my shirt.
I can get you out of here.
I don't want to get out of here.
What?
This is the greatest thing ever.
These people think I'm a God.
They wait on me hand and foot.
What do you think's gonna happen
when they find out
you're just an ordinary...
whatever you are?
I'm not going anywhere, Savva.
I want to stay.
What's the worst that could happen?
You're gonna do what to him?
Sit down. You've got to hear this.
Tell him what you told me. Go on.
Our oldest stories tell us
that our God, Makatunga,
has been lost,
wandering in the swamp
for thousands of years.
It is our duty to help him
ascend back to heaven.
You're gonna kill him?
- That's why he came here.
- [laughs]
I wish I could see
the little chew toy's face
when he figures that out.
Grandpa!
My popchock found something.
What is she talking about?
My skull bowl has audio.
It's stop.
Well, the visuals were great,
but there was not much of a plot.
I read lips.
She was talking about y'all.
What about us?
She said she never going
to let you through
to see the Magic Man.
She'll use her whole army
to keep you out.
She gonna kill y'all.
The four of us will never
get through her ranks.
I guess we'll have to find another way.
Okay, let's go.
But I gotta make one quick stop.
Put me down! I command you!
The God of the swamp commands you!
[panting]
I think it's safe
to stop here for the night.
Ah, thank God!
Try not to trip over your tongue.
Why are you following us?
It is obvious. The poor girl
is in the throes of amour.
Deep, torturous, oblivious love.
In the past, girls her age
have fought epic battles over me.
What? You?
You think she's in love with you?
Yes, of course!
Who else? The little boy?
The pink marshmallow? The puppy dog?
My guess is you're
the last one on her list.
Please, I want to come with you
on your journey.
- Why?
- It is obvious, isn't it?
I have reasons of my own.
May I tag along?
Why not? Why should there be
one person in this forest
that doesn't join our trek?
Thank you.
[whining]
Makatunga!
No, Princess. That's just Puffy.
He's not a God.
What? But the prophecy...
It was a mistake. He's just...
He just a... He just a...
That.
[snores]
Now I understand.
Now I understand what you are.
I must warn Savva!
I can't believe it.
ZEE: Mom! Show us how to...
Majesty, you are so lovely,
so wonderful, so ravishing,
so beautiful.
[kissing]
Well?
[gibberish]
On our way to slay the hikers,
per your instructions,
we followed the wolf's track,
and then we saw a Rickie.
- Rickies?
- It's crazy!
He changed into a Rickie,
and then after a moment,
he changed back into a white wolf.
Rickies turned into white wolves?
Of course!
That's it!
Red Brain!
Yes, Madam?
The Rickies are a terrible enemy,
but they are better
than the white wolves.
They protected the humans.
I'll never get my slaves if they return.
We are going to war!
Against the wolves, madam?
But they are extinct.
No! Against the Rickies!
Go to them!
Tell them we are at war!
You want me to go to the Rickies?
Walk right in to their palace?
Yes, Madam.
Shall I take the royal guard
for protection?
I can't afford to lose
any of them before a war.
Take the Crackers.
Crackers!
You wanted to talk to us, Ms. Mom?
You will accompany Red Brain
to the Rickie castle.
Hoo-whee! The Rickie castle!
Well, if that don't beat all!
[laughing]
- Indubitably.
- If we're going to war,
I'm gonna need a whole new
camouflage wardrobe.
Spread the word across the forest,
around the mountains, far and wide.
The Monkeys have declared war
on the Rickies!
[clamoring]
Wait a minute.
What just happened?
Where's Nanty? Where's Anggee?
Did anyone see where they went?
Guys, something's coming.
Something big! Ohh!
Nanty, where have you been?
Are you okay?
Your friend the wolf,
he not so much wolf, cher.
- What do you mean?
- I saw him in the woods.
He got plenty dark magic, Savva.
- I saw him transform.
- Into what?
Your wolf friend, he's a Rickie.
- No.
- I know what I seen, sure.
No, you got confused, and it was dark.
She's telling the truth. I am a Rickie.
Oh!
Sucks! Well, I never!
If you can't trust the family
dog, who can you trust?
I can explain.
Explain?
You've been lying to me this whole time!
- I had to.
- Why?
So you could lure me out here?
So you can feed my soul
to your Rickie friends?
It's not like that. Trust me.
I can't trust you!
I don't know who you are!
I don't even know what species you are!
I'm your friend, like always.
No! You're a liar!
I thought you could really help me!
- Savva, please!
- Leave me alone!
Well, this is awkward.
How could you, wolf?
That boy loved you.
- I'll go after him.
- No!
You get away from us,
and you stay away from him!
- I can still help.
- We don't need your help.
Go away!
Well, I guess I'm in charge now.
Can't trust anyone!
Wish for it with all my heart. Hah!
Everyone is just out for themselves.
[thump]
[thump]
[rumbling]
Anggee!
Savva!
What was that?
A Rickie.
A big Rickie.
Oh!
Well, what do we do, leader?
I'm not a leader.
You just said you were.
That's before you said I was.
Now that you said I am, I am not.
- Oh, come on!
- No, you come on!
Who are you to tell me to come on?
- I...
- Fine.
You're not the leader.
Yes, I am.
Let's go rescue Savva.
Anggee!
Savva!
Why are you doing this?
It's your father's order!
Anggee, help!
I'll save you, Savva!
[grunts]
Anggee!
All right, Father.
I will come.
Hey! Let me out!
How am I gonna save my Mom now?
What's gonna happen to my village?
[evil laughter]
Wherever you are, Savva,
know that I am looking at the same moon.
Now you kneel before me?
I've come to apologize, Father.
I know that I let you down,
but why did you take the boy?
You would have never come
if I had not done it.
What's so special about this boy?
He reminds me of what we really are.
They say that you managed
to lift the curse
and walk as a wolf again.
Maybe I can do it for the rest of us
if Savva and I can get to the Magician.
Father, can your troops help us
get through the Monkeys
to the Magician?
You chose this path.
I am happy as a Rickie.
I don't want to change back.
Then I will take the boy and go.
You may end up alone.
I am always alone.
Come with me if you want to live.
Really? That's a pretty corny line.
Savva, get up now.
Is it really you?
I'll explain later.
And so it is my duty to inform you
that because of your warrantless actions
to help the human boy
get to the Magician,
Her Majesty Mom Jozee,
monarch of Monkeys,
champion of chimps
and Goddess of gorillas,
has declared war upon the Rickies.
How dare she.
War, it is.
Look, nobody is here.
Probably they knew that I was coming.
[gasps]
Ah! Uh-huh.
Hi, guys!
Hello!
Where is the, um...
the washroom here?
Look, what I've got!
Makatunga!
The God of the Swamp People!
I wouldn't mess with me if I were you
unless you want to get yourselves
into a serious trouble!
I am Semi-baron Fafl!
Women have fought epic battles over me!
Well, guess there's no point
to continue this conversation.
Thank you, goodbye,
good luck and so long!
[gasps]
Death dealer!
Death dealer! Death dealer!
Death dealer! Death dealer!
Death dealer! Death dealer!
Death dealer! Death dealer!
Why are they scared of you?
They recognize my natural
physical prowess.
I am Semi-baron Fafl!
Never forget that name!
That was weird.
What next?
Now we need a plan.
NANTY: Savva!
Nanty! Fafl! Puffy!
Thank goodness you're alive.
We went in after you.
What? How did you escape?
It's me. It was me.
They were all afraid of me.
- That was true. Terrified, really.
- It's the truth.
I've never seen anything like it.
They ran from him.
How did you escape?
- Anggee got me out.
- It don't add up, pal.
If he's a Rickie, why would he
save you from his own outfit?
Yeah, why?
Gather around, and I'll tell you.
ANGGEE: You all know the story
of the white wolves.
We had lived in harmony with man
for hundreds of years,
protecting them from their enemies
until, in a time of desperate hunger,
our leader, my father,
- attacked a human.
- [woman screams]
As punishment for attacking humans,
the Magician gave us human form.
The white wolves are the Rickies.
Yes.
Now skip ahead, get to the good part.
Why are the Rickies afraid of me?
It was the cruelest part of the curse.
Because we had come to think of
ourselves as such mighty beasts,
the Magician made us vulnerable
to the tiniest creature in the forest.
- You're kidding. Seriously?
- Yes.
A Rickie can be killed instantly
by a single bite...
From a mosquito.
Me?
Wait a minute...
I'm sorry, Fafl, but it
wasn't you they were afraid of.
Well, what do you know about that?
Impossible!
I mean, I saw them!
They recoiled!
All right then! Answer this.
Why aren't you afraid of him?
ANGGEE:
When Shi-Sha broke my curse,
even though he only half succeeded,
and I continued to change
back and forth,
I lost my vulnerability to mosquitos.
But they were... No.
Now who's a warrior without rival, huh?
Great. Now he'll be insufferable.
[distant clamoring]
What's that?
[Monkey shouting]
[shouting continues]
All of that is for us?
What do we have to be worried about?
After all, we have Mosquito on our side.
Savva, trying to get through
that Monkey army
without the Rickies is impossible.
It's not too late to go back.
He's right.
There's no shame in it, cher.
No. My village is depending on me.
And your people are depending on you.
We'll get through.
I believe it with all my heart.
What are you doing?
Sending a message to my grandpa.
Do you want me to make
your sword strong?
Can you do that?
Simple magic.
That's it.
Amazing.
- It looked so simple.
- It is.
Practice six hours
every day of your life
from the time you are three years old,
and it becomes very simple.
[tender music]
SAVVA: Anggee, is it true
that the sun and the stars
will go out one day?
ANGGEE: Yes.
SAVVA: But why?
Because they are not eternal.
What is eternal?
Nothing.
Nothing is eternal.
What about God?
God is, perhaps,
the only one who is eternal.
What about the heart?
No, the heart is not eternal.
But doesn't God have a heart?
Yes.
Of course He does.
His heart is eternal as God himself.
Who's there? Show yourself.
[footsteps]
Grandpa! You got my message!
Well, we will help you, darling.
Thank you for coming, but we
are still vastly outnumbered.
Angacetus.
What are you doing here?
I have a message from your father.
Rickies will fight on your side.
We will give you support.
Be our leader.
I smell Monkey barbecue.
[chuckles]
[clamoring]
Why are we here?
Are we having a giant picnic?
Here they come.
Here they come!
[clamoring]
You don't have to join us.
Sure, I'll go sit over there
and watch like a girl.
Hello, 911?
[chuckles]
I'm sorry, old friend.
I need to wake you up.
[roars]
[distant roar]
What is that noise?
Oldi has woken up.
- What do you think?
- I don't. I'm dumb.
Whee-ha!
Ready?
Come on, get over here! Hurry over here!
Steady!
Shoot!
Shields up!
Can't hide from Terminator!
Hold the line!
Onward to the Monkeys!
Where is the restroom here?
I'll be quick.
Platoon, go!
March on, troops!
No problem!
We're shredding and smashing.
Shredding and smashing.
Thank you, kid.
No more mercy!
I've got a pink lightsaber!
Gor, crush monkeys!
What on earth is that?
An overgrown bat.
Father!
All of you cowards
against my Monkey people?
You'll have it the hard way then!
You brought me the information.
Go and wake them.
What if they won't come,
little bloodsuckers?
They are living in a cave on my land.
Tell them to come,
or I'll send the Exterminator!
Mama Jozee needs your help!
We are under attack by the Rickies!
I get itchy from mosquito bites,
but if they help us win the battle,
I guess it's okay.
[buzzing]
Death dealers!
Do something!
You're the king, aren't you?
I can't stop them! We have to agree!
Agree with a mere insect?
I can not stop so low!
Fafl! Semi-baron, look!
[buzzing]
That doesn't look good.
I'm their only hope!
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
I agree! You are the only hope!
You are completely correct!
Ah, that was humiliating.
Okay, bug, show us what you got.
Fafl, you're an idiot!
Stop!
The king! It's the king!
We will not bite a Rickie today!
Not one!
Our enemies today are the Monkeys!
[buzzing]
You parasites!
You traitors!
[buzzing]
Help!
Put me down!!
[howling]
Look, Ma, no hands!
I spent three hours on this hairdo!
This is terrible!
Well, it certainly seems
as though this might be
a propitious time to...
I'm out.
Perhaps it is a propitious
time to get lost.
Well, is this it?
Are we done?
Yeah, this is it. Goodbye and good luck.
You're a good man, Semi-baron Fafl.
Hah! It shows what you know!
I...
Oh. Uh, thank you.
Hey, hey!
I'm free! I'm free!
I am so happy.
I never have to hear his voice.
His stupid stories.
You never have to smell him.
Ah.
Well, I'm free.
That was really nice of you.
I have no idea what you mean.
Okay, fine.
Anggee, can you walk?
- I'm fine.
- Then let's move.
I want to get to the Magician
as soon as possible.
What kind of magician
lives in a place like this?
I know this house from old stories.
It is the house of the Old Witch.
House, turn your back to the forest,
your front to me.
That's what you're supposed to say.
- Oh!
- Relax.
It's just a big fat turkey.
Who is this Old Witch again?
- She's a witch who...
- A witch who what?
Who eats children.
Of course she does.
Well, that's a good sign.
SAVVA: This place is creepy.
Maybe no one's home.
Me and my big mouth.
It's an old shirt.
You were expecting a magic cloak?
Honestly, we were expecting a witch.
Oh, Old Witch.
No, she hasn't lived
in this house for years.
What happened to her?
Let's just say...
she tried to eat the wrong little girl.
You're the Magician?
Let me guess.
Magicians have to be men and old.
It's a rule.
Ah, it's nice to see people again.
You must want something.
Go ahead, Savva.
You know my name?
Of course I do.
Now out with it.
I was told that if I made my way to you,
you might have a warrior here
who could save my village.
He's right through that door.
He's been waiting for you.
Go ahead.
Ah, Fafl.
Remind me again why you were cursed?
Uh, because of my pride and arrogance.
You're kidding!
Because I believed myself
superior to everyone else, okay?
Where's the mosquito?
Gone. He's free.
We agreed.
Kneel.
With this magic wand, I dub thee
full-fledged Baron Fafl,
and I return you to your original state.
Oh, it's me! I'm back!
I'm really back!
Hello?
Is anybody here?
My name is Savva.
I think I'm looking for you.
You certainly look powerful.
Can you save my village?
Why don't you answer me?
What my father did was wrong,
but we've paid a heavy price.
We've seen how dark our souls can be,
and we're better for it.
I agree.
Then lift this curse.
Transform, Anggee!
The Rickies are no more.
Nanty, what can I do for you?
Nothing.
I have everything I need.
Are you sure?
Thank you, but I'm sure.
Come on, we need to go.
My village is waiting, my people are...
What?
Really. I got nothing.
Oh, I thought you were
an enchanted prince?
Yeah, not so much.
I wanted friends.
No more loneliness. I got them.
You came all this way.
There must be something
I can do for you.
[chuckles]
Delightful!
Did you find what you were looking for?
Yes, thank you.
Door, please.
Puzhalsta!
Ah...
Wow.
You, uh...
You really are... handsome.
Well, you know,
maybe slightly above average.
You are our leader now.
Listen, I can make you rich!
I can make you the dragon in
charge of all the other dragons!
I accept.
[howling]
Anggee, my village.
Climb on.
We'll get you there in no time.
Ah, well, thank you!
This is very nice of you,
very nice indeed,
because I am no better than you at all!
GIRL: Is that Savva?
BOY: They're so gonna eat him.
Savva!
It's okay, Mom.
What are you doing?
Saving the world entire.
Wait.
It's between the two of us.
[snickering]
Well, well.
You can't beat me, sweetie.
Is that all you've got?
Bad dog!
We are not your slaves!
Please.
Spare me.
[hyena whimpers]
[gasps]
Never come back here again!
Yeah! You better run!
[snorts]
- Oh!
- [hyenas laughing]
Savva!
I saw him first!
He's mine. Back off!
[screaming]
So, here you are,
tell me, what did you finally
ask the Magician for?
Uh...
[hums]
[crowd clamoring]
Makatunga!
Makatunga!
[cheering]
Put me down this instant!
That's an order!
There's gonna be dancing!
[cheering continues]
All your dreams have come true.
You've achieved what you wanted
all by yourself.
Now I must go.
I must hurry and catch up
with the others,
for I am their leader.
I'll miss him so much.
We'll see him again, cher.
I saw a magical dream
I had a vision
What a surprise!
What will you do
now that your curse is lifted?
I thought I would head north.
I've gotten quite used
to roaming these last few years.
I could head north.
Oh, inviting yourself, are you?
I'm not going to wait
for you to invite me.
I'll be old and pink.
Do I look like the kind of man
who wants to travel
with an oversized cotton swab?
I'm the one who has to put up
with your stories
about women fighting over you
all the time.
They were fighting over me
six minutes ago!
What a surprise! They fought the duels
with nothing but chewing gum
and paper clips!
I suppose you could come in handy
if I have to clean my ears.
Why are you so sad, Savva?
I don't know.
It's the first time
I found a true friend.
He is not leaving, cher.
I'm gonna miss him anyway.
[distant howling]
I believe
I hold your hand to my heart
There's no more fear
I feel so strong in my soul
I want to share it
Now I know what it's like
Wish with all my heart
I believe
The love I feel inside
In truth I want to find
The guidance in my heart
I believe
You're here with me to stay
And all I have to say
Forever I'm your friend
I believe
The love I feel inside
In truth I want to find
The guidance in my heart
I believe
You're here with me to stay
Hey, fellas!
Fafl, is that what
those women fought for?
Found a nice country girl for myself.
Bit of a junk-food addict,
but she sure knows what a man wants.
Told her you'd be
the best ride for our honeymoon.
Hey, pal, I called shotgun first.
I'm loving it!
Manual corrected, synchronized,
and spell checked by H@w-to-kiLL.
[hip-hop music]