Adam & Paul
Oh, for fuck's sake!
What's wrong with you?
Some fucker's had to glue me
to this thing.
Would you wait
till I get out of me sleeves?
You go that way there.
There's no glue on that bit!
"Made in... Bulgaria. "
- I feel sorry for them, I do.
- Who?
The Bulgarians.
Have nothing, they have.
- I feel sick.
- Yeah.
- What money have you?
- I don't know.
Odds and coppers.
Fuck...
Where the fuck are we?
- How the fuck did we end up out here?
- I don't know.
I haven't been out
here in years.
Fuckin' years!
- All right, lads?
- All right, yeah.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, good, yeah.
Nothin' mad goin'
on or nothin'?
Not a fuckin' thing!
- Look, lads...
- Yeah?
What's the story about scorin'
around here, do you know?
Well, you could try Martin
in Block B, Flat 63.
- Thanks. - But he won't
open the door to youse.
- Thanks.
- No problem.
- Oh, here, youse wouldn't have
a smoke, would youse? - No.
Thanks.
- Look, I'll do the fuckin' talkin',
all right? - Yeah.
- He might want somethin' doin'
or whatever. - Right, good.
Like what?
I don't know.
Bit of fuckin' carryin' or whatever.
All right, yeah, a bit of carryin'. Or maybe
put up some shelves or somethin'.
- Fuckin' whatever!
- Yeah, yeah.
Hello?
- There's nobody there.
- Shut up!
I can hear him movin' fuckin'
around. I fuckin' smell it.
- Hello! Martin...
- Hey, who's that...? - Martin!
- Hello! - Get away from the door, lads.
The place is crawlin' with viggies.
- Martin... Martin, we just want
to talk to you a minute. - Jesus!
You've three seconds to
get away from the door,
or I'll come out and fuckin'
batter ye! - Jesus' sake!
- I swear to God, lads, I will do
fuckin' time for youse! - Oh, fuck!
- But, Martin, what about
your shelves? - What?
Right, lads, you've asked for it!
Come back here
and you're fuckin' dead!
Fuck off, ya fuckin'... gaybag!
Hey, what are you
doin' out there?
Oh, fuck!
- I'm fucked.
- Yeah.
Here, do we have a plan?
Um...
- Into town.
- Yeah...
- See who's around, what's
goin' on, like. - Yeah.
- Get some money.
- Yeah.
And then score.
Super. Yeah.
- I'm goin' to get sick. - You're grand.
Put your head between your legs.
I'm goin' to have to get off.
I'm goin' to vomit.
You're grand. Hold it.
- Oh, good Jesus!
- Is right.
- I'm goin' to vomit.
- Oh, for fuck's sake!
I'm fuckin' freezin'.
I don't think there's any more.
Wait, I've somethin' in me shoe.
Here we go. Come on!
Wait! Fuck's sake...
Aaagh! Agh, me fuckin' leg!
- I'm fuckin' sweatin'!
- Yeah, sick all right!
- All right, Adam and Paul?
- All right? All right?
All right, yeah.
Good, yeah.
Anythin' mad or anythin'?
No, just in here, like.
- Bit of the old skills training
with the young fella. - Oh, right.
- That's your young fella?
- Yeah. That's Georgie Junior.
Isn't that right, Georgie?
Here, I'm talkin' to ye!
No respect for his old fella.
Who had that baba for you, Georgie?
- Tina Blake.
- Blakey's sister, yeah? - Yeah.
All right.
Where are you livin' now, Georgie?
- Why do you want to know?
- I don't. I was just askin'.
Well, Georgie Junior lives with Tina, like.
I mean, we're not together or anythin'.
Not any more, like.
Me and Tina.
- All right. Sorry.
- It's fine, but.
I mean, no hassle, like. I get Georgie on
Wednesdays and the weekends sometimes.
I bring him down here,
or go to McDonald's or whatever.
Throw her a few
bob when I has it.
- Yeah.
- It's the same all over.
- It's the way of the
world, mate. - Yeah.
So, where have youse been
the last few weeks?
- I haven't seen you since...
- Since what?
Matthew an' that.
Just hangin' around, like,
you know? Just layin' low, like.
- So were youse at it
this morning? - What?
- They had his Month's Mind
this morning. - Oh.
- Dead a month, like.
- I didn't fuckin' know that.
Right.
Go on, Georgie, kick the ball!
Kick the ball.
Go on, pass us the ball.
Will I kick the ball? - Jesus...
...would you leave the young fella alone?
You're frightenin' the fuck out of him!
Sorry.
- Sorry. - Hey, Georgie,
that's enough now!
You have me fuckin' worn out!
- Look, Marian and the gang are over
the far side of the park. - Right.
- Are youse coming over?
- I don't know. Maybe.
Suit yourselves.
Come on, Georgie,
for fuck's sake!
I can't do it now, love.
Fuck off and play for a while!
She has me worn out, that one...
always wantin' her hair plaited.
That's cos she's probably seen it on the
telly or somethin'. Britney or somethin'.
I'm right sick of it.
Oh, Jaysus!
Look who it is!
Look over behind Georgie.
Fuckin' Adam and Paul!
- All right, Georgie?
- All right, Marian?
All right, Marian?
Marian... Orla.
- Wayne.
- Wayne.
Lads. All right, Georgie?
All right, Wayne? Orla.
- Georgie.
- Out for the day, yeah?
Yeah, just havin' a little picnic
for the kiddies.
Throw us over another can, Orla.
It's a lovely day, isn't it?
Hey, Georgie Junior, were you kickin'
that ball, were you?
- He fuckin' was, weren't you?
- He's shy, is he? - A bit, yeah.
Come on, kiddo. We'll go and
kick the ball. Come on, Georgie.
It's too fuckin' crowded around here!
Come on, kiddo.
Come on!
Will you have a can, Georgie?
No, you're grand. I can't.
- Why not? - Tina would go mad if
she thought I was drinkin' again.
- It's only a fuckin' can!
- Well...
Go on.
All right, quick,
before the young fella sees.
- Georgie!
- I'm fuckin' comin'!
What happened to you?
- Me?
- Yeah.
I got knocked down by a moped.
- Fuck off!
- Serious. - Yeah.
- Dope!
- It did hurt, it did.
Me leg's fucked.
All scraped an' all, you know.
Orla, give them two a can
before me heart breaks!
- They don't fuckin' deserve it!
- Thanks, Marian. - Thanks, Marian.
Here you are.
I never saw youse this morning.
No.
- Thanks! - Sorry.
- He was your mate, lads.
Sorry.
- So did youse just not bother goin'
or what? - We didn't know, Marian.
- Sure!
- We didn't fuckin' know!
- That's not my fuckin' fault!
- Sorry.
Fuck youse!
I'm fuckin' sweatin'!
I am.
Well, youse were missed.
Me ma was there an' all.
- Roarin', she was.
- In bits.
Heart is fuckin' broken
over Matthew.
She'd like to fuckin' see youse!
Waste of time, if you ask me.
Look at the fuckin' state o' youse!
Do you remember them three, Orla,
years ago?
Do I fuck! Sure, didn't they
practically live in our house?
Fuckin' idolised them two,
Matthew did. Idolised.
- Adam, Paul and Matthew. Like the
Three Musketeers, youse were. - Yeah?
And now look at youse.
Youse are like the two...
fuckin' eejits!
Sorry.
He'd have been better off
if he'd never set eyes on youse.
Sorry.
Here...
Light up that spliff for yourselves.
Relax, like.
So...?
So?
- So where have youse two been?
- Around. - Yeah.
- Right.
- Layin' low, like.
Low, like.
Was Janine there, Marian?
This morning?
She was.
Not that it's any of your business.
- Doin' very well for herself,
she is now. - Yeah?
- Yeah. Isn't she, Orla? - She is, yeah.
Total straight and narrow.
- Very healthy.
- Yeah.
- And she does keep that
flat lovely an' all. - Yeah.
- Full of lovely gear.
- Yeah.
- Where did she get all that stuff?
- Wayne got it for her.
For getting it together, like.
Brings her stuff.
- He's a good brother to her.
- He is.
- Love to see her, we would.
- Yeah.
Listen to me. Stay away
from me fuckin' sister, all right?
Keepin' herself tidy and happy,
and I'm fucked if I'm havin'
you two drag her down again.
- Another fuckin' Matthew?
- But, Marian...
Sorry about that.
Tell them, Wayne. Tell them.
- What?
- To stay away from Janine.
Lads...
if I see youse near Janine,
I'm not jokin' now, I'll kill youse!
- OK? - Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Do you understand?
- Yeah. - Yeah.
So are youse two goin'
down the Bunker later?
For what?
What?
Fuckin' big mouth!
What?
- Nothin'!
- What, Marian?
We're goin' down the Bunker later,
is all.
Yeah?
- A few drinks for Matthew.
- Why the fuck are you telling them?
- Look, they were his mates, Wayne.
- Only, don't go upsettin' people.
- For fuck's sake!
- Leave it, Wayne.
Come on and we get out of here.
- Steven, Sinead, Karl, come on!
- We're playing!
I don't give a fuck, love.
We're leavin'!
Maybe see youse later, lads.
Yeah, all right.
- Marian?
- What?
You wouldn't have a lend
of a few quid, would you?
Goodbye, lads.
- Come on.
- Where?
- We'll see if what's-his-name
is around. - Who?
Fuckin'... what's-his-name.
- Small fella.
- What, Benny?
- No, Benny's inside.
- Oh, the poor fucker.
Come on.
All right, Adam and Paul?
All right? All right?
Shit day, isn't it?
- Shit, yeah.
- Are you not freezin' in that bag?
No, it's peachy enough, this. I mean,
I only have me cacks on under here.
- Oh, right, yeah. - Me clothes are all
at the bottom there.
Oh, right, yeah.
- So what are youse doing here,
anyways? - Just hangin' around.
- Why?
- No why.
- Has to be a why. - Yeah, well,
I'm not tellin' fuckin' you!
We were just waitin' to see
if what's-his-name is around.
Don't tell him all our
fuckin' business!
I wasn't tellin' him all our
business. I was only sayin'.
- Who's what's-his-name?
- Would you ever fuckin' stop buttin' in?
- Just tryin' to help, is all.
- Well, no-one asked for your fuckin' help!
Fine, shove it up your hole so!
No, you shove it up your hole!
Look, I'm not hangin' around here
any more. Prick!
Is it Clank?
- What?
- Is what's-his-name Clank?
I don't know.
- What does he look like?
- Big fella.
- I'll keep me eyes peeled so.
- Oh, thanks.
Money, is it?
- Well, it's just...
- Bastard!
- Who?
- Clank. How much?
- What? - How much does
Clank owe you?
- Nothin'. - A few hundred, is it? - No.
- Bastard! I haven't seen him around.
- I think he's gone to England.
- Oh, right, yeah.
- To his brother.
I think he lives in Leeds. - Right.
- Semi-professional footballer.
- Yeah?
- You haven't got a smoke on you,
have you? - No.
I was going to ask you.
Little prick.
He's gone to England.
- Who?
- Clank.
- Who's Clank?
- What's-his-name.
- No, he's not.
- What?
What's-his-name isn't fuckin' Clank!
- Who's what's-his-name then?
- It's fuckin'...
I don't know!
- And who's Clank?
- I have no fuckin' idea!
- Right. So what are we going
to do now then? - I don't know.
A few cars, I suppose.
No, look,
I'm a bit sick for that, like.
I'm dyin' sick, like.
Go, go, go!
- Oh, me fuckin' hand!
- Fuckin' eejit!
Come on out of the fuckin' road!
- I think it's broken.
- Show me.
- Can you move it?
- Yeah, I think so.
- Well, it's not broken so.
- I sprained it maybe.
Yeah, maybe.
Oh, me fuckin' hand
and me fuckin' leg!
- Would you slow down?
- Would you hurry fuckin' up?
Could I have a pot of tea, please?
A single pot?
- Sorry? - A single pot? A pot for one?
Or do you want a large pot?
Eh... Will you hold on a minute,
please?
Do you want tea as well?
Will I get a large pot?
Will you just get up there
and keep her fuckin' busy?
Could I have two small pots,
please?
You'd be as well off
with the large pot so.
Well, whatever you think yourself.
It's up to you, love.
All right, I'll have the big pot
and a round of toast, please.
One round of toast?
I think so, yeah.
- We're havin' loads of weather
at the moment, aren't we? - What?
That'll be 2.90, please.
What?
Two euros ninety for the pot of tea
and the round of toast.
Eh...
Hey! What do you
think you're doing?
Leave that bag down!
Hey, missus, is that your bag?
I just found the bag there.
I wasn't doin' anythin'.
Leave the bag down or
I'm callin' the guards!
- I wasn't fuckin' doin' nothin'!
- Someone call the guards now!
Go on, get out!
- Just get out!
- Sorry.
Adam...
Just go in and get somethin'.
Stick it in your jacket.
I'll wait for you
down by the river.
- All right, Adam and Paul?
Still lookin' for Clank? - What?
- I heard youse were lookin' for Clank.
- Who told you that?
I don't know. The word's out.
- Owes you money, apparently. - I told you
not to open your fuckin' mouth. - Sorry.
- He's not in England.
- Like I give a fuck!
Fine.
He's inside, I'd say.
Or just out maybe.
- What'll I get? - I don't know.
A choc ice or somethin'!
- A Yahoo maybe as well?
- Yeah.
- What flavour will I get?
- I don't know. Don't be fuckin' askin' me!
- I'll try for chocolate.
- And some bars. Chomps maybe.
- Curly Wurlys are nice.
- Fuck off, you! Chomps. Or Moros?
Will you just go in there and get somethin'?
I'll wait for you down by the river!
All right.
Are you all right there?
Yeah, just lookin'.
Anything in particular?
What?
Are you looking for anything
in particular?
Eh... bread.
Bread?
- Yeah. - Well, you're hardly going
to find it staring into the fridge.
I was just decidin'.
Right, well, decide fast
and fuck off!
Yeah.
Em...
Bread over here...
Are you going to buy that?
Probably not.
Take your hands off it.
People have to eat them!
- I was just seein' was it fresh, is
all. - Of course, it's fuckin' fresh!
If you're not going to buy it,
what difference does it make to you?
- I was just seein'. - Take your hands off
the bread. They're filthy! - Fuck off!
That's it. Come on,
you're fuckin' barred.
- You can't bar me for feelin' bread.
- Watch me.
Will you get off me, will ye?
You can't throw him out.
He wasn't doin' anythin'.
Karl, fuck off, you're barred as
well! Don't make me call the cops.
- Here, if we were black, you wouldn't
be throwin' us out. - Karl, fuck off!
Here, I got the bread for you.
It's all squashed an' all.
That fucker would've been
throwin' it in the bin.
He might as well have let
you take it. Asshole!
Here, thanks.
- You wouldn't have a fag, would you?
- No. Sorry.
Fuck!
Fuckin' baguettes and milk!
Fuck's sake!
- I was thrown out.
- Fuckin' typical!
Excuse me.
Yes?
Is there a chance
you'd move up the bench a bit?
Why?
I just want to sit down, like.
Here is much of room on this side.
Yeah, but me mate...
But I have placed
my bag on here.
I know, yeah, but I just want
to sit alongside me mate.
Who?
- Look, will you move up the bench,
for fuck's sake? - Hey, what is this?
I am sitting here first.
I have my bag here.
Is public property.
Just a bit, yeah?
Fucking hell! Jesus!
Fuck's sake!
Thanks.
Just give me the fuckin' milk!
- Hey! What is the fuck?
- Sorry, I wasn't aiming at you.
- Why you throw this milk? - It was an
accident. - It was supposed to hit me.
- Sorry. - Fuck's sake! My pants
and my bag all fucking milky!
Why are you sitting so close to us
in the first place?
I don't fucking have to ask
your permission where I am sitting!
Quit your moanin' so!
A fuckin' accident!
A fucking free country it is here.
I sit where I like!
- Too right a free country!
OUR fuckin' country! - Oh, yes.
- Yeah.
- Here we go.
Yeah, here we go,
back to fuckin' Romania with you!
Oh, yes, always fucking same.
Always fucking same!
- Yeah!
- What?
You are stupid person.
- And you are all stupid people.
- Oh, yeah? Why?
I am not a fucking Romanian.
- Yeah?
- Always the same.
Fucking Irish! You say, "Go home,
you Romanian this and that!
You fucking Romanian pig!
"You Romanian fucking sponger!"
You listen to me now.
I am not a fucking Romanian.
My whole life,
I am never Romanian.
My family has no Romanian peoples.
I've never been in fucking Romania!
When you Irish stop
calling me Romanian?
Do you understand what I say?
- Yeah, fine.
- Yeah, right.
- So where are you from then?
- Jesus' sake!
I am from Bulgaria.
So is his jacket.
- What? - His jacket
was made in Bulgaria.
Oh, show him.
Fuck off!
- So have you been here long?
- Two year.
It must be a relief, like.
Why?
Why you say a relief?
- Well, just...
- Fuckin' ignore the cunt!
It's like Bulgaria is a shithole.
No, it is not!
No, but in comparison, like.
- Comparison with what?
- Well, Dublin.
You fucking Irish!
Is it I am going fucking crazy?
You listen to me now.
Bulgaria is not a shithole.
Beautiful. It is beautiful.
And now Dublin,
it is the shithole.
Full of liars and fucking maniacs
and fucking Romanians!
Well, why are you here so?
Because...
I have to leave Sofia.
Oh, right.
Was she pregnant, like?
What?
You fucking crazy,
stupid Irish!
Why am I here?
Did you ever ask yourself
the same question?
Why are YOU here, huh?
Why the fuck are YOU here?
Fuck this! Come on.
- Where?
- Just move.
Wait.
Excuse me.
Do you have some change?
Thanks!
- Jaysus! Do you see
who's over there? - Where?
It's fuckin' Munky.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
- He's goin' to fuckin' kill us, man.
- Why don't we go over to him? - No.
- No, we can ask him. Come on.
- Fuck's sake!
- All right, Munky, how's it goin'?
- Fuck off, Adam and Paul! - Hold on.
- Fuck off! - We just want
to talk to you. - No, fuck off!
Fuck off yourself! Fuck off!
Who the fuck do you think you are?
Fuck off!
Hello?
Hello! Nialler!
Nialler! Nialler! Nialler!
Nialler, are you there?
It's ringing.
'Hello... ' Hey, Nialler, how are you?
'This is Nialler. I'm not here.
Leave a message after the beep. '
Fuckin' answerin' machine!
- Get your hands off me!
- Fuck off, you!
Ya fuckin' gorilla!
I'll fuckin' sue you!
- We were fuckin' in there
fuckin' spendin' money! - Fuck ye!
Fuckin' prick.
Here...
What is it?
- Is it cramps, is it?
- Yeah, fuckin' cramps.
Well, you're grand. They'll pass.
No, they won't.
I need to have a shite.
Are you sure?
Of course I'm sure!
- I need to go now.
- Yeah, well, go then!
Where?
I don't know. Behind somethin'.
I can't have a shite
behind somethin'!
- Yeah, well, a toilet then.
- Where?
- I don't know. The electric one
on the bridge. - No, I can't.
- Why not? - Cos I'm afraid of it.
- Oh, for fuck's sake!
I'm goin' to shit myself.
Look, will you just go
down the end of the lane?
I'm not havin' a shite down a lane!
I'm not a fuckin' dog!
- Here!
- What?
I need somethin'
to wipe myself with.
Oh, for fuck's sake!
I'm not wipin' meself
with a 'tato bag!
For fuck's sake!
Yeah, come on.
- I'm in bits.
- I know.
I'm dyin' sick, like.
I fuckin' know.
Right...
Come on.
- I don't think this is
such a good idea. - Shut up.
- Yeah, Wayne, but...
- Forget Wayne! Fuck Wayne.
This is not Wayne's business.
Hello?
Janine?
There's no one.
- That telly's nice.
- Big.
- It is.
- Yeah.
- It's a good picture, isn't it?
- Clear.
It's like looking out a window,
isn't it?
It is, yeah. Except it's cartoons.
Yeah.
The whole place is spotless, too.
Lovely.
Yeah. Crazy.
What?
- Spending all your money
on your flat. - Do you think?
Yeah.
Only gets robbed in the end.
- I suppose.
- Definitely.
Sure, that telly's worth money.
A few bob.
- Askin'.
- Askin'.
- Bit heavy, though.
- No way.
D'you think?
Here.
Lift it with me.
Come on.
- See? It is light enough.
- Yeah, easy steal. Easy.
- You'd never get away with it, though.
- I suppose.
Unless you took it straight out
the front and down to Kittser.
That's be the thing.
Rid of it fast.
- Could it be carried that far, d'you
think? - Don't know. Wanna try it?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, I'd say.
- It's askin' to be robbed.
- Askin'.
Ah, who's the baba, baba, baba?
Who's the baba, baba, baba?
You're the best baba, baba.
Aren't you?
You are, aren't you?
You are.
What are you doin'?
Checking down the
side of the cot.
- For what? - They put money
in cots for babies. - Who?
Old ones. Aunties and all.
Ha, look.
The baba's smiling.
Look.
Who's the baba, baba, baba?
You're the best baba, baba.
- Give me the baba.
- Who's the best baba, baba?
Are you the baba, are you?
You are, aren't you?
Aren't you the baba, baba?
Aren't you the baba, baba, baba?
You are. Aren't you the baba?
Aren't you the baba?
How the fuck did you get in?
The door was open.
It was left open.
- It wasn't.
- It was, Janine.
- I'd remember leaving it open.
- Well, it was.
It's amazing you haven't had
everything robbed or fuckin' broken!
- Ah, no way...
- Fuck's sake.
Fuck's sake, yourself.
It was just the ordinary morning mass
and all, 10 o'clock.
But they read his name out
at the end.
Ah, nice.
- His ma was fuckin' roarin'.
- Yeah?
Yeah. Hopin' to see
youse there, she was.
- Askin' and all where youse were
and things. - Ah, right.
- There's a do on tonight for him
down the Bunker. - We heard.
You're looking great, Janine.
Yeah. Really good.
Thanks.
How are you feelin' and all?
Really good.
That's good, yeah.
Just bored, mostly.
I never get out or around.
Aye, borin', all right.
It's good to have youse around.
Nice, like.
You can't stay.
Aye... yeah.
We know.
Fuck it. I'm going to have to drop
the baba round to my ma's.
Yeah, all right.
Look, why don't you come
down the Bunker tonight?
I don't think anyone would
want us there, Janine.
- You know, Wayne.
- Fuckin' Wayne.
Don't mind Wayne.
He's grand.
- He's been a great help to me lately,
he has. - Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
Always bringin' stuff round for the flat
and all. And a few bob for being clean.
Still, though...
Look, fuck them.
I want you there.
You should be there.
I'll be out in a minute.
- Will I see youse tonight?
- Yeah.
Say day-day to your daddies.
Day-day.
Day-day.
See youse.
- All right? - Waiting on my bus.
- On your own, yeah? - Yeah, number 16.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
- The 16? - Yeah.
- Well, do you wanna see something?
- What? - It's down the lane there.
- What? - Wait till you see. - What?
- I can't tell you. It'd spoil it.
Are you coming, are ye?
C'mon.
- My bus.
- There's loads of 16s.
Do you have a mobile phone?
- I'm not allowed.
- Fuck's sake.
Here, is there anything
in his bag?
- Nothin'. Only drawings
and fuckin' rubbish. - Fuck's sake.
Right.
- Have you any money?
- No!
- Even a few quid. - No!
- Stop the crying.
- Give us your money. - I haven't got
any! - You must have fuckin' money.
- Only my bus money.
- Fuck's sake!
- Adam, we can't leave him here.
- We didn't fuckin' touch him.
Now come on.
What the fuck are you doing
going round tellin' people about me?
- How?
- Sayin' I owe you fuckin' money!
- I never... - Sayin' you'll
fuckin' burst my head?
- I have no idea who the fuck you are.
- Scumbag!
- Honest to fuck.
- Are you windin' me up? - No!
- I have no idea who
you are. - Clank!
- Clank?
- Fuckin' Clank!
Yeah, Clank.
Ah, Clank,
it's nice to meet you.
Ah, Clank, me hole!
Get in the fuckin' car!
Would you come on?!
Here, Mr Cough.
If you get sick in my car,
I'll fuckin' kill you.
- I'm grand... - I'm just tellin' you.
- All right, Zippy. Head out to McCarthy's.
I feel a bit of carnage comin' on.
Right. Here's the deal.
You two lads have caused
me an awful lot of upset today,
shouting your mouths
off about me and all.
I've decided to be merciful
and not rip your fuckin' heads off!
- Thanks. - But the way I see it, youse owe
me, so here's the way it's gonna go down.
Me and Zippy here are going over to
that shop to cause a bit of mayhem.
- D'you understand?
- Yeah.
What I want youse to do is stay
here and at the first sign of trouble,
you just honk the fuckin' horn.
That's all. Think you can do that?
- Yeah.
- OK. That's good.
And when it's over, we're quits.
I'll even sort you out with a fix.
- Great! - Thanks, but.
- Right, Zippy? - Yeah.
Let's go.
Right.
Out, you, that side,
to stand guard.
- It's locked.
- Well, unlock it!
No, it is unlocked.
It's... just shut.
- Closed.
- What are you on about?!
- You know, the thing. For kids.
- Show me.
Ah! Mind me fuckin' leg!
- Oh, fuckin' child lock!
- My fuckin' leg...
Climb out of the front there
to be open from the outside.
How can I climb out the front
with me hand and me leg and all?
Jesus!
I wish they'd fuckin' hurry up.
My fuckin' leg is killin' me.
Fuckin' sore, it is.
- Would you leave it alone?
- I'm not doing anythin'.
- You've got your dirty fingers
all over it. - I was just lookin'.
- Fine. Let yourself go septic.
- What?!
Your leg will go septic
if you keep touching it.
- Why?
- Because your hands are filthy.
They're not filthy.
Oh, fuck!
You're fuckin' dead!
They're going to fuckin' kill us.
Not lookin' out was bad.
Then stealin' their car, but.
They'll fuckin' butcher us.
Just fucking...
take it into town.
- Scrap. We'll sell it for scrap at the
flats. - I think you took a wrong turn.
- Yeah? - That last turn. If you took
that, you'd be at the flats.
I'm takin' it round the back
of the flats. Nice and quiet.
Round the back, no fuss.
See who's around.
- Avoid the fuckin' cops.
- Yeah, pigs out.
Aye.
- Is there another lane there?
- Where? - Beside the shop.
- I don't know. - You're useless.
- I don't notice things like that.
Well, there is. See?
Notice.
Fuck!
Ohh... fuck!
Fuckin' hell. Let's get
out of here before anyone arrives.
Me fuckin' head...!
Here, lads. What happened
down there?
Don't know.
Some young fellas is after robbin'
a car. Near fuckin' killed us.
- It's wrapped around the bollard.
- Fuck's sake!
All I need is the cops with
everything in there fuckin' robbed.
- Down the end of the lane it is.
- Yeah. Nearly fuckin' killed us like.
Right. I'll see if I
can get it moved.
D'you need a hand at all?
- No, I don't. And don't youse be hangin'
around here, do you hear me? - Yeah, yeah.
Bad for business.
Now fuck off.
My fuckin' hand...
and my fuckin' leg
and now my fuckin' head!
Why can't things be easy?
Just for once.
Just for once to be easy
and fine and relaxed.
And to be lucky.
Just a bit of fuckin' luck!
That's all.
Hey, lads, where's Noelie?
- His down the lane lookin' at a crash.
- Fuckin' well for him!
My fuckin' arms!
I'm not bleedin' waiting.
You work with Noelie, yeah?
- Just fuckin' leave it here.
- That's what I'm doin',
- you bleedin', fuckin'... - Woman.
- What did you bleedin' call me?
- No, I was just helpin' him,
like. - Lads, mind that.
Tell Noelie Laurence
dropped it in. He knows.
- Keep it out of sight, will youse?
- No problem. - Certainly.
- Come on!
- All right, I'm comin'!
Oh, me fuckin' arm...
- I can't see where I'm going!
- I know where you're going.
Where did youse get it, lads?
- We just had it, is all.
- We just had it.
And now we want to get rid of it,
you know?
We robbed it.
Very good.
And who did youse rob it from?
Em...
Noelie.
- Good luck, lads.
- No, it's cool, but...
Noelie would burn me to the
ground if he found that here.
- See youse later lads.
- Kittser, you must know someone.
Hm, we know loads of people.
Someone to take it.
It's worth money.
Please.
All right, but if I ever
hear a word back 'bout this,
youse will have the living shite
kicked out youse. Understand?
- Understand.
- The living shite.
Come on, get out.
Must be broke.
Come on. We'll take the stairs.
Oh, fuck, no!
Wait! It might work.
Here.
Just fuckin' get movin'.
Fuck's sake!
Would you fuckin'
pull at your end?!
How can I with my fuckin' hand
and my fuckin' leg?!
- Come on, lads! We haven't got
all fuckin' day! - Oh, for fuck's sake!
Come on!
Come on, come on, come on!
Now shut up
and leave me doin' this.
- So? - I have this telly,
as you can see.
Kind of special.
I need to offload it, out of town.
- So?
- Give it to you for...
180?
Good telly. Flat screen, Black
Diamond, surround-around sound.
People pay a lot
more than that.
- 75. - Gringo,
I am tryin' to help you here.
Oh, really?
You were good to me once.
Now let me help.
Who the fuck do you
think you are?!
I know who I am, Gringo.
So let's start again.
The telly.
- I'm done with you.
- Whatever.
- Just take my help, little man.
- I don't need your help. - You do, but.
You always did.
- Would you look at the fuckin' state
of you?! - You're toxic, do you know that?
For the last time, Gringo. Take the telly.
You're on the skids, buddy.
- Fuck you.
- You little nobody.
You're a scumbag. A fuckin' user,
and a GREEDY scumbag!
- Greedy, is it? - So take yourself
and your junkie helpers...
...and FUCK OFF!
I'll show you, Greedy.
You can keep the telly.
It's yours - for nothin'.
God...!
I trusted you,
you fuckin' scumbag!
Aaargh!
Come on, Martin!
Open the door, get out here,
you scumbag!
- Get away from the fuckin' door! - We can
do this the easy way or the hard way!
- Stop fuckin' around then!
- OPEN IT MARTIN!
- Batter that fucker in.
- Don't fuckin' touch that door!
Jesus, fuck!
Back where we started.
I'm gonna die.
Put that down!
Wave bye-bye, lads!
Wave bye-bye!
Martin!
- Get a hold of him!
Get a hold of him! - NO!
No-o-o!
Jesus. Georgie, Georgie, come here.
I want you to meet someone.
Right, now...
Adam and Paul, come on over.
Come on over.
Youse are good boys.
You were always good boys.
- You all right, Ma?
- Grand. I'm grand.
- Do you want a drink?
- There's one there, I think, is there?
- That one. Is it mine?
- I don't know, just fuckin' drink it.
I don't want to drink it
if it isn't mine.
- Is it mine? - How should I know?
- Fuckin' ask someone.
- Ma, would you just drink it?
- All right.
I'd hate anyone would say
I'm stealin' drink.
Do youse want a drink?
- Broke, like.
- Fuckin' surprise, surprise!
- The state of youse.
- Here. Go up and get yourselves a can.
- Ma, don't be buyin' them nothin'.
Fuckin' waste. - I want to.
I fuckin' want to.
- You should be done with them.
- Would you don't be so fuckin' hard?
How can I be done with them?
Practically brought up with us.
And Matthew,
the same as they are now.
# As I was walking
down Broadway
# Not intending to
stay very long
# I met with this pretty
young damsel
# As she did come
tripping along
# And what she took out
of her pocket
# And slipped it
right into my hand
# With her hair
hung over her shoulder
# Tied up with a black
velvet band
# Her eyes
They shone like diamonds
# You'd think she was
queen of the land
# With her hair
hung over her shoulder
# Tied up
with a black velvet band... #
I told youse not to
be mad out of it.
Sorry.
- A lot of people here, isn't there?
Friends and that. - Yeah.
And his ma.
Always in here she is.
Nice, though.
- She's a fuckin' mad thing.
- Don't be saying that, Janine.
# With her hair
hung over her shoulder
# Tied up with a black velvet band! #
So where did you score today?
- It fell on us, Janine.
- Fuck off, you! - Serious.
- What?
- We found it.
- How much?
- Loads.
- Do you still have some?
- Yeah.
- Here, don't be fuckin' goofin',
and people lookin'. - Sorry.
- Make a show of yourselves.
- Sorry.
Come on out to
the air for a bit.
- Gone cold now, isn't it?
- Yeah.
Nice, though.
It was nice to see you today.
Yeah.
- Good, yeah?
- Yeah.
And the baba.
Yeah.
- Important, like.
- Yeah.
All right?
Yeah. Just talkin'.
Right.
Gone very cold,
isn't it, Wayne?
Janine...
- Matthew's ma's in a bad
way inside. - Yeah?
Bawlin' and all.
Fuck.
Yeah.
- Better go in to her.
- Yeah.
Be back in a minute.
I wanna talk to youse more.
Right.
Fags for youse, lads.
- Thanks.
- Thanks.
Now... just fuck off yourselves,
all right?
Aye... right.
Only upsetting people.
- Right.
- Sorry.