Agostino (1962)

1
Why don't you sleep a little longer, eh?
Good morning.
- Thanks, I'll take care of it.
- Gently, gently, do it gently.
You've already ordered breakfast?
Le voil!
What's the rush?
Are you so hungry?
No, no.
Leave it to me,
when will you learn to keep still?
Today we're going to the sea, right?
Yes.
No, no, no.
- Shall we take the boat?
- Serve...
No, no, no milk.
Not with the sailor, right?
I don't know why you feel uncomfortable
with him, my poor boy. He's funny.
Then why don't you go over to play
with those English children?
But they're are stupid, they are.
They know nothing about anything.
And what do you think you know,
since you know nothing?
Why do you say that I know nothing?
On the contrary,
I know many things.
I know that your perfume
is named "Per lei"
I know what you read,
- I know everything by looking at your face.
- And what else?
And sometimes, just sometimes,
I know what you're thinking.
Oh, yeah?
And what am I thinking now?
Now...Now you're thinking, thinking,
thinking, thinking...that I love you.
That's what you think!
Did I guess right, Mom?
Tell me if I'm right.
Yes, you guessed right.
During that month-long vacation...
Agostino and his mother
were always together.
Beside her Agostino felt safe,
as if the day were loaded with meanings...
that only his mother knew...
and that she would have
revealed them to him.
All this culminated in
a feeling of high purity...
that filled him with joy.
Come on.
Give it to me.
And now, wear this.
Now we'll take the boat
and go away.
Give me that.
How thin you are!
You have to eat more.
Yes, yes, fine, but hurry.
To the sea, let's go!
I'll take care, little boss.
OK.
Mom, would you come on?
Mom!
Come on.
You like it?
When did you buy it,
why didn't you tell me?
How curious you are.
I just bought it, why should I tell you?
Of course you have to tell me.
Agostino...
- come here beside me.
- Right away.
- Look over there. A jellyfish.
- What?
- Look.
- Where is it?
There, you see it?
I don't see it.
Look down at the bottom.
Ah, yes, now I see it.
But it doesn't seem to be alive.
How can it be alive?
Look, it's not moving.
Why is it so clear?
Glass like.
You should never touch it.
Why not?
They are covered with a substance
that irritates your skin,
the same one that
makes it glow at night.
Shine how?
A luminous substance.
Clearly visible at night.
They breathe very slowly.
They open and close like flowers.
But look, it doesn't look
like a living animal.
It has no eyes, no mouth.
They are invertebrates.
They have some name
I can't remember.
I think that...coelenterates.
How did you know?
I've studied it,
and now it popped into mind.
How many things you know.
Come on.
Come! Come, Agostino.
Look at me, Mom!
I'm diving.
Ah, how nice.
Hear how your heart beats.
Look, Mom, the jellyfish!
Where?
Look!
I'll help you.
Rest a little, there.
Now turn around.
And stay that way, right?
Agostino obeyed,
and was as proud as someone...
whom has been allowed
to participate in a ritual.
Behind him his mother's body,
naked in the sun.
Wrapped in a mystery
that deserved great veneration.
And for long there remained in his soul...
the confusion and folly of his filial vanity.
One morning, while they were lying around,
the shadow of a person blocked
the sun in front of them.
Good morning.
Have you already been out
to sea this morning?
Not yet.
Can I invite you to a boat ride?
But you...
are not accompanied?
Not every time.
Then you'll come?
Yes.
Don't just sit there,
move around a bit.
Go play, I'll be right back.
With jubilant happiness,
the mother accepted the invitation,
as if she had long since
decided inside herself...
not to miss the opportunity,
and as soon as it shows,
takes it without hesitation.
You like it?
Would you like to steer?
Come here.
Let's see if you can pilot, eh?
This is the accelerator.
But you don't mess with it.
Hold the wheel steady.
You understand?
And go straight.
You never go for a walk,
never to a show,
are you always with your boy?
Yes. I like being with him.
Do you know you have...
you have the demeanor of an untouchable woman?
Yes?
But you don't lack company, I think.
Am I right?
Ah, come on, tell the truth.
Shall we swim here?
Here? All right.
So...
do you like the boat?
Do you like to drive it? Eh?
- You like driving it?
- Yes, thanks.
You're not a man
of many words, are you?
With me he's a talker,
always wondering.
He's the man of 1,000 whys,
why this, why that...
Until the end.
Agostino, aren't you coming in?
Come!
But what are you doing, no!
No, stop!
Wait for me!
No, no.
Don't be afraid.
Agostino...
why don't you come in?
Come on, it's warm.
Dive.
No, I don't feel like it.
Don't do your apathetic routine.
Do you see how
serious a child I have?
Is he always so serious?
On the contrary.
Help me up here.
For the first time he felt the mother's
womb trapped in the swimsuit...
as the vehicle of a dusky and vital thrill.
And even with
a lively sense of disgust...
because of a painful obstinacy,
he didn't want to avoid it.
You feel cold, eh?
I'll dry you right away.
- Do you want me to?
- Yes, thanks.
You're still cold?
No.
At least make room
for this innocent child.
OK, let's see.
Who's this one?
Louis XV.
Well. Now him?
Robespierre.
OK. Now...
Here's another.
For a few days,
the young man didn't show up.
The holiday continued happily then.
Agostino and his mother
were always together.
Waiter.
What shall we have?
Two ice creams.
- Yes.
- Two glasses, right.
Right away.
This music reminds me of Austria.
That's true but you...
how do you remember?
Of course I remember.
Really.
Check out that weird guy.
Speak softly, he's a famous painter.
You know him?
Yes, I've seen him before.
What's his name?
I don't remember.
Together they discovered
that their faces...
had many common features...
often they were saying
the same thing with the same words.
Often Agostino and his mother
could complete each other's phrases.
If they lost this intimacy,
thought Agostino,
what would have become
of his serene happiness?
Come. Come and look at it from here. Look.
From here it is even more beautiful.
It's Martini's.
When I was in the Literature Faculty
at Padua I saw it every day.
How beautiful!
Look! Looks like a marble mountain.
Let's go over there.
Come.
It seems to be a representation of Pompei.
It's beautiful.
Come along.
Sometimes the son's childish intuition...
clarified his thoughts.
Agostino felt inside him
the power of these moments.
Have you seen that?
How strange this painter is.
He's named Redon.
He is a painter from early twentieth century.
But, truth be told, he's not well known.
I do not like it.
Look... it seems to be nightmares.
But it was not always like that.
How are you?
We've kept you waiting, huh?
Not at all.
There were more trips.
Agostino got the duty of accompanying them
and attending their talks,
their swimming.
He felt embarrassed and superfluous.
He sensed that both of them understood it
and had decided to leave him alone.
But in the end was he always weaker and
condescending on his mother and the young man.
You aren't going to the sea today?
I told you I do not know yet.
You're playing hard to get, right?
What did you say?
And you, what do you want?
We're playing.
They're not supposed to see me.
Why shouldn't they see you?
Would you shut up?
He'll run away, come on.
They're gone.
Who?
Why do you care?
I'll play, too.
On your side.
But with that face?
I'll give you whatever you want.
And what would you give me?
This.
And what do I do with this?
You sell it.
How clever! Then you squeal on me, right?
Do you have cigarettes?
Yes.
I'll take this for myself, right?
What's in here?
That's more like it, a thousand lire, eh?
What's your name?
Agostino.
What a name, you were born in August?
No.
My name is Roma, but who cares?
Come on.
If Tortima sees you, he'll break your head.
Why?
Why, why...?
You'll find out why.
Come on, hurry.
The lifeguard is right there, run!
You smoke?
I don't like it.
Is your mother who doesn't want you to.
Here, smoke.
Stupid! Here's how.
I bet you don't know how
to blow smoke from your eyes.
Put a hand here.
Look into my eyes.
Look.
Take this, you!
Who do you think you are, huh?
You did it!
What did I do to you? I gave you cigarettes.
I'll split you in half, you got that?
And go back to Mom, go.
Here we are, come on, Agostino.
This is the lair.
This is August.
He followed me.
But if you don't like him I can throw him away.
You know why is he following me?
You were afraid, you hid in a tent...
and so the lifeguards saw us
and we had to escape.
Not true. Agostino, you tell him.
Yeah...that's right.
- Moron, I'll break your nose!
- Let me alone!
Cigarettes. I'll keep these.
Give me the cigarettes,
I'll break your nose, you know.
Give me the cigarettes, hand them over.
Let go of my arm.
Beat it.
Bastard!
Give me the cigarettes.
Come on, give them to me.
And if it doesn't suit me to give them to you?
Please, put them inside.
- I saw him, it's him.
- I saw him too.
- I saw him, it was Moro.
- The Sicilian?
- Yes, that one.
- He's my age.
How excited she was!
She was so excited!
Breathing hard, shaking crazily, right?
He had her immobilized,
then he took her, and zum!
And then with the other hand
he pulled the bra...
she had a breast as big as the moon.
It looked like a trophy, it did.
And who is she with?
Who is she with? But who do you think,
maybe with a cheapskate like you?
And this brat, where did he come from?
This one I brought myself.
On his beach, all of them are tufted women.
And they all are desirable!...
To Pirola, they give lots of money, lots.
Eh, Agostino? What do you say,
money of every color?
His mother is that type.
Those who have money...
are all depraved.
Come on, August, tell us.
But what should I tell you?
You are rich, right?
I think so.
How much? 1,000,000? 2,000,000? 3,000,000?
I do not know.
Got a big house?
Yes, and we have twenty rooms.
Asshole! How lucky you are!
Right. We have two lounges.
And there's my Dad's study.
Cuckold!
Dad's dead.
Then his mother is a widow.
And, yes, of course.
And within these halls, what is done, eh?
And why, don't they know what they're doing?
Dancing, laughing,
and then make love at night, eh?
No, not making love.
If I go to your house and wanted to talk to her,
what would you do?
I'd say you should leave.
And if I don't go?
I would call the butler.
You even have household staff?
You know what I'd do?
I'd get in the middle of the party and start
yelling at that bunch of whores and pigs.
But tell me, your mom, she has lovers, eh?
Yes or no?
Men, don't you know what they are?
Of course you know them, right?
And what do they do, do they kiss?
Sure they kiss, no, parrot?
They kiss, Agostino, eh?
They kiss, tell us.
Tell me the truth, eh?
This way.
But don't you see that he doesn't know?
Why do you say he doesn't know anything?
Now, August, a man and a woman, what do they do?
A man and a woman.
Who wants to tell him, eh?
Me, me, me!
You shut up, I'll fill him in, I will.
But you don't know, either.
But what could you know?
The one to explain should have already done it.
Sandro, you tell him.
- Sandro.
- Sandro.
Tell him.
What should I tell you? It's nothing special.
You've never seen two dogs?
Scarpa, you show him.
Come, Moro, let's show it.
I play the man and you play Agostino's mom.
Come on, Scarpa, come on.
- You show him.
- Open, open sesame.
Open, open sesame.
Open, open sesame.
Open, open sesame.
Open, open sesame.
Open, open sesame.
Open, open sesame.
Open, open sesame.
Come on! Great!
Open, open sesame.
Open, open sesame.
Come on, Roma, enough.
Open, open sesame.
Open, open sesame.
We should go for a swim!
- Come on, let's swim!
- Let me alone!
No, let me alone!
Let me alone!
Help!
Come on, Berto, let him get lost, let's go!
She is a woman,
nothing more than a woman,
he repeated to himself.
From that day there began for Agostino...
a dark and tortuous time.
They had opened his eyes by force.
But what he had learned,
was more than he could bear.
Hidden, he observed
the intimacy of his mother.
His eyes stared where the day before
he would not have dared lift them.
Now, in light of the revelations
of Saro and the boys...
his mother appeared to him
in an entirely new way,
full of shameless portent.
Oh? You're here, dear?
When did you get back, eh?
Hello?
Good night.
No, I won't go.
Don't be childish.
What swear words!
I don't know about tomorrow.
Tonight, absolutely not.
That's how it is.
I'm going to bed.
At this very moment
I'm not free to speak.
Good night, Renzo.
Have you felt lonely today...
without me around?
Say no more about today.
OK?
Hurry, it's late,
you still have to get dressed.
Mother's drive took longer than usual.
The beach was already empty.
Agostino waited,
and imagined the mother surrendered
in the arms of the young man,
he was sure that that day,
what had happened is what his presence...
had been preventing so far,
as demonstrated by the kids...
and Saro.
He loved the only woman
who he was able to approach,
and this woman was his mother.
And so what were you up to?
I had a lot of fun.
I went out with the engineer's children.
- Yes?
- You know, our tent neighbors, you know them?
We went to the sea, we found a fishing boat.
And then we went for a swim.
And you? You, where did you go?
To the lighthouse.
Fishermen paint shells.
I wanted to buy one,
but I had no money.
Well, time to sleep. Snuggle up.
You can tell me tomorrow.
He wanted to watch closely...
in her the tracks of that day.
And he wondered what would...
boys older than him do...
about his love for his own mother,
upon learning what he already knew.
The summer was ending.
Very few isolated tourists...
still milled about in this weak September sun.
But, how many empty
and unhappy days awaited Agostino,
before that vacation ended.
He noticed that something
within him was changing.
And felt that the heavy mockery
of the guys about his mother...
had hastened this change,
and precisely for this reason
it should be sought and cultivated,
this mockery.
He wanted so badly
not to love his mother,
but he failed miserably.
I don't understand. You're always running off.
Even on the beach,
you leave without saying a thing.
I get bored. You get bored hanging out here,
you're always running off, too.
You want to come with us?
Renzo so told you many times...
Renzo is your friend, not mine.
Why are you sharp with me like that,
I don't even recognize you.
Forgive me.
Who are these new friends?
Some kids.
I already told you.
But, look, there are many
cute guys here, too,
in the hotel,
and you don't stay even for a minute...
It's a graveyard, can't you see that?
People here are all mummies.
Look, there:
that lady with those eyes.
She has a hairy eyelids just like a cave beetle.
There, at the back,
one with elephant legs.
Fat ones, this fat, look.
And insolent, too.
Don't talk so loud.
I wonder why rich people here are all so ugly.
The worst example of the
champions of the bourgeoisie,
they all are immensely rich,
they are ugly and stupid, too.
It's weird, they should be beautiful people.
They are too rich to be beautiful, and too old.
You're right, even the kids seem to be oldies.
But you, you are very beautiful.
And also you are rich.
Now, let's go rest.
I'm not resting today.
And where are you going?
To take a walk.
No, dear. Today stay at the hotel.
I'll be right back.
No, dear. If you want,
you can play in the lounge,
and when I come down,
we'll go swimming together.
- OK?
- OK.
Come on. Up, up.
"Do you want to play with me?"
"No, thank you."
Agostino!
- Hello.
- You know my brothers?
I didn't know you had so many brothers.
You know what? This year he'll be going
to school at Montana, too.
Did you get Frau Getz this year?
Yes, poor thing.
Look how beautiful a collection of stamps
from Ghana she sent me.
That's nice.
And you, what are you doing?
I'm bored, how about you?
We too, quite.
God willing, in a month we'll be back to school.
Fortunately, me too.
Goodbye.
How freakish had seemed to him
these well-educated children.
Their leisure tainted by
the monitoring of governesses.
How boring were their conversations about
school, about stamps collections.
An irresistible desire pushed him
to look for the boys' gang...
that exercised over his soul
a dark attraction.
He would have wanted to become like them,
so indifferent and happy.
Come on, Roma.
Oh, look at that, beat that!
I won!
- Quiet, quiet, wait.
- Let me alone!
First let's measure.
It's too clear that I won.
Four plus four, eight.
Four plus three, seven.
Agostino won.
The richer you are, the more you win.
August, come here.
Want to bet it on the lottery?
No, no, no. I've won it and I'll save it.
Stupid! Stupid moron,
because you're rich!
And you're a cheapskate.
That's what you are.
What did you say?
You're a cheapskate.
Roma!
Come on board,
there's room for everyone!
Push the oar!
Fish!
Come on, Agostino.
There should be four or five, at least.
Now I'll sell it.
Stop there.
All of you wait for me here.
No, you wait here.
But one of us must come to watch.
Come, Agostino, come on, Agostino.
Yeah, I'm going.
You think you're a smarty,
your face shows you're a smarty.
I take who I like.
I know where you're heading to.
To that cow Tecla's, that's where.
You're going to that cow Tecla's, eh?
And who's that cow Tecla?
That's her there, look.
With 3,000 lire, she does whatever you want.
And you, you've done it?
Yes, but for free.
The money is for us.
Here, come peek.
She's usually asleep this time of day.
She works at night.
Come.
Look.
But she does it with everyone,
really with everyone?
If they pay for it.
And how do you do it?
It is very simple.
You go in, greet her,
because she is very nervous,
I guess?
She would dare punch you in the face.
Then you pretend to chat a bit.
If she realizes that you are well-mannered,
she takes you to bed.
Careful.
What is it, Agostino?
Why are you looking at me like that?
Won't you tell me?
What's the matter?
Come here, Agostino.
Give me a hand with this.
Ready?
But, you're hard, indeed, my child.
My sad little boy.
Come here!
My love? Come here.
It seemed to him that the relationship
with his mother should have been clarified.
And she should have
realized the discomfort...
the annoyance,
the disgust it aroused in him no...
from her touch.
And from that day he began
to spy on and watch over his mother,
with the specific purpose of destroying
the aura of dignity and respect...
which until now she had had in his eyes.
He wanted not to love her more anymore,
because of the resentment of having thought
she was so different from what she was.
Yet he had, however,
a dark sense of impurity...
that only the company of the boys,
even more impure,
and that brutal joke about his mother...
could make unnoticed.
Good morning.
Well, what is it?
And the others, where did they got?
They went to the island.
You'll see, someday you'll get
a shock of salt in the ass.
I didn't go, you know?
Because you didn't want to.
I didn't go so I could stay with thee.
Don't address me "thee", Moro.
We aren't brothers.
Shut up and stay in your place.
Understand?
- And when will they get back?
- This very night, very late.
But if you want,
we can go too.
- How?
- With the boat.
Let's go in the boat, fine!
If everything goes well,
we'll get there within half an hour.
We'll arrive, but if they're walking around
the island, how'll we find them?
We will find them,
we will find them.
Come on, Agostino.
Agostino, listen.
I and Saro have something to do,
we don't want people around.
Understand?
And now, make me happy,
go away by yourself.
But why?
Because we have something to do.
But I want to go.
You should not come.
No, leave me alone.
Listen, come some other time.
Some other time, I promise,
Agostino, I swear!
- No, I said no.
- I swear.
But why I can't go?
Look...I give you this, look.
I give you all of them.
No.
But what do you want?
To go to the island.
Come on, Agostino.
There you go.
You, push.
Saro!
Beat it.
Let me go, Saro!
What have I done to you?
Go by the steam boat or by the flats.
Saro, what have I done to you?
Saro!
Saro!
Saro!
Saro!
What have I done?
Come on, take the helm.
Stay focused, eh?
That way, steady on, you know how. Bravo.
That way, steady on, eh?
No, no, no. To the other side.
That is it, very well, bravo.
No, a bit more.
Steady, steady.
Fine, that's it.
This way the ship'll run faster.
You go to school?
Yes.
What grade are you?
Third grade.
What do they teach you?
Italian.
Latin.
History, geography,
other things.
They teach you many things.
And do you like it?
Sure.
Enough.
Poetry, do you know any?
Yes.
Would you tell me one?
I don't know which one.
No matter, whatever you want.
Goethe:
"Strong winds, deep night...
"who rides at night?
"Tight, tight, a father holds his son
in the clutches of his arms.
"With my shield, I confront the threatening sky.
"I confront the dark ghosts
that hide in the night, a crowd of them.
"My son, why?
"Why do you hide...
"with horror your dear little face?"
Let me alone, please!
But what's the matter,
are you scared?
What are you afraid of?
I'm a good man, you know.
If I want...
I could crush people's heads this way.
But I'm good and then...
I forgive.
I was taught to forgive.
You know any other poem, eh?
Yes.
Tell me another one.
The cypresses:
"There at Bolgheri, high and upright,
"they go by San Guido way double-parked
"almost running, those giant children...
"jumped to meet me
and to watch me go by."
Hey, heads up!
Do you see the island?
Saro! Look, August! August!
Agostina!
It is the same one, our August,
you like to ride in a boat, eh?
Here's the whore.
This morning you have been changed.
August, Agostino!
Look at the fag!
Come on, pull!
Then, you and Tripoli can get engaged,
shake hands. Fags!
But, why are you laughing at me
just because I came in the boat?
What is there to say?
You want to play the smartass, eh?
Liar, fag, fag.
What's the big deal?
I recited a poem to him.
A poem!
Ask him whether it's true.
Ask the employer if the wine is good. Eh, Saro?
Come with me.
And you, what do you want?
Wretch!
Agostino,
tell me the poem, too?
Tell it to me, too, this fine poem.
We'll see what that poem says.
And c'mon!
Come on, Roma, enough.
Get out of my sight.
But, go away, go away.
Saro, we stole a lot of watermelons.
Then the dog started barking,
and then the old man arrived.
We got even Moro!
The old man showed up with the gun
and started shouting:
thieves, bastards!
And we...running toward the boat,
and him, shooting.
He told us to fuck off!
Fortunately the old man is quite blind.
Roma, then, when we were away,
he stared shouting...
to him that he was a cuckold.
You should see the old man!
He jumped on the bank
and screamed like a madman.
Look, we also stole some corn cobs.
Give me one.
Come here, August.
He felt a desperate desire
to leave the boys behind him,
to leave Saro, the mother,
and his whole old life.
Who knows, maybe there was a country
where he would be accepted for his heart,
and where he would had been able
to forget everything he had learned...
and then learn it again
without embarrassment or offense,
in as sweet and natural a way
as it should have happened.
Sandro!
Here.
Why do they always tease me?
Moro came on the garbage scow.
He said that you had gone
in the boat with Saro.
Yes, indeed.
I wouldn't go alone together
on the boat with Saro.
Why not?
Why, don't you know?
Come on, smart guy, yes, you do.
No, I don't.
Come, I'll tell you.
Ah!
Uh! They have eaten the watermelon.
Come see.
They have eaten it,
but they didn't call us.
Yet he gave some to Agustino.
You see that? Fag, fag.
We do not want queers.
Sandro, let's go swim naked.
Come you too, Agostino,
and we'll show you the strip-tease.
Agostino, if one nice day your mother
should see me so naked,
what would she say?
That we would do it?
Of course we would.
A nice look around and then...
Go on, Roma, bang!
Come on, Agostino.
But what are you ashamed of?
Hey, he's ashamed.
Tell me, what did you
tell them about me?
May I ask?
The truth, I told them.
And what is it?
If you keep playing the whore with Saro, I'll go
to your mother and I'll tell her everything.
But my mother does not
even know who you are.
Look what a sight!
The jealous fairy.
Come on, give him a nice kiss,
then I'll make them a pretty picture.
Come on!
See what else!
All of you're crazy!
It seemed unfair...
that in that sea, beneath the sky,
a boat should sail so full of malice,
with that Saro, glad and proud.
He wished they would sink,
and he thought he would gladly die,
while he too felt tainted...
and pleased.
You're upset with Moro?
Yes.
And you scare him.
How?
Easily.
If you help me...
And why should I help you?
I'm not like you.
This your personal business,
between you and Moro.
But, who do you think I am?
Let me go.
Let me go, I told you, let me go.
Let me go! Let me go!
Let me go, I'm not like Tripoli.
Sandro also believed in the libel,
the only one who had
showed him some friendship.
This incident convinced him more than ever
that he didn't belong in their world...
and he would never really
be part of the boys' gang.
He had been on his best behavior...
yet he thought he had lost
his original condition
without being able to acquire another one.
It seems that nobody lives here.
Yes, indeed.
Where are we?
We are in the estuary.
You see, sir?
In the background is the cemetery.
It is true that the dead are sunk in the sea?
So they say.
It is true, sir.
But why?
Because the earth is wet...
and beneath there's running water.
It can be found.
They drill and...
beyond that, I can't explain further.
How grim a chat.
So if they sink into the sea,
they are here all around us...
when we swim.
Yes, they are all around us.
Enough with this talk.
All right.
Right rudder...
And that, what is it?
That is the house of the spirits.
It is inhabited?
There was an Englishman.
The house had no window glass,
so you could see through
the windows from outside.
He was a man who knew
how to organize his parties.
A strange guy, crazy.
And then they shut it down.
Why?
Yeah, why?
Because he used
to put his guests in the garden...
all naked.
Motionless exactly like real statues,
so they said.
And people passing by of course protested...
but he continued his parties.
Lighting up his spirits like ghosts.
Are you afraid, Mom? I am.
Well, no.
Come here, near me, Agostino.
You shouldn't be afraid.
They had fun, you know?
And how much!
Of those bygone days...
he had no more than
a dark sense of impurity.
He seemed to have
ruined his own innocence...
to a confusing,
hybrid condition,
which he had yet to see clearly..
if this were not to lead him
to even deeper darkness.
He often had very distressing nightmares,
that definitely revealed to him...
his true hidden desires.
To feel free of that maternal love.
To cut forever that link
of dark deviant sensuality.
This seemed the most urgent
objective to achieve.
And to achieve it soon, very soon,
he would interpose between him and his mother,
the image of another woman.
Agostino.
Where have you been, eh?
I've been fishing.
With whom?
You're going out tonight, too?
Yes.
With Renzo?
Yes.
Agostino.
You'll find dinner in the room.
Sandro! Sandro!
Agostino, what's up with you,
wandering around at this hour?
I can guess.
So no kidding around, OK?
Look, I have money.
And where did you find it? Eh?
I took it from my mother's bag.
You became smart? Bravo!
You kept your word.
Come on.
But will she be at home, Tecla?
Could she be gone?
We'll have to see.
It'll still be a good time.
It's your first time, eh?
Yes.
There is nothing to fear.
Just leave everything to her.
But should she want to do it with me?
But you, you do want to?
I want to become like you.
You'll tell her, right?
Yes, yes.
Who is it?
Tecla!
So? What do you want, criminal?
Go away or else I'll call the police.
But I have money, look!
Open, don't mess us around.
Come in, come on, just this once.
Hey! And this one?
He's a friend.
But how do you dare to bring a child to my home?
I do not want brats.
Disappear! Go with your mother. Out.
Let me in, I beg you.
Come, sit here.
Sandro, Sandro, open up!
Sandro, open up, Sandro!
Nothing had happened,
nothing had changed.
The next day would start up again
with the teasing of the guys,
the impure torment of the
relationship with his mother...
still many years stood between him...
and the liberating experience.
And with this thought he felt in his soul...
some bitter feeling...
of not being ever able to possess a woman.
Mom.
You're not asleep?
I want to leave this place.
Why?
What's the matter,
you're not happy here?
Mom.
I want you to not treat me
like a child anymore.
Very well.
I'll treat you like a man.
As a man he could not help but thinking...
before falling asleep.
But he was not a man.
And long unhappy time would pass...
before he was.