Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip (2015)

ALVIN: Are we rolling?
Okay, we're rolling.
Dave's birthday message,
take 1.
Happy Birthday, Dave!
We know how hard you've been
working on Ashley's album...
so we thought it would be fun
to surprise you
with a little party.
Hey! I thought you said this
was a going-away party for us.
Uh...
Take 2.
(CLAPS)
To celebrate your birthday...
and The Chipettes leaving to
guest-judge American Idol...
we thought we'd throw you
a small get...
(PHONE RINGING)
Hold on, that's the DJ!
Wait, "DJ"?
Okay, fine, so it might be
a medium-sized get-together.
Alvin, did you
hire someone to build
a half-pipe in the back yard?
Of course not!
The party planner did.
You hired a party planner?
No, he did not hire
a "party planner."
Oh, thank goodness.
For a minute there, I...
lam an event planner.
Marco, I'm done
giving you instructions.
Oh, boy.
Dave, it's all good.
It's just us.
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
Nothing too cra...
ALVIN: Theodore!
You hit the flip button!
Oops! Um, hi.
So, the guest list got
a little out of hand.
SIMON: A little?
Dave, I had nothing
to do with this!
Happy Birthday, Dave!
Whoo-hoo!
Redfoo is here?
Yeah, he is,
because I got him here.
The Redfoo, from a little band
called The Foo Fighters.
What?
Well, there's no way
to sugarcoat it, Dave.
The cops are here! Ow...
And they're having a blast!
Happy Birthday, Dave!
(CROWD CHEERING)
This does wonders
for my glutes!
ALVIN: This party is the least
we can do for you, Dave.
Yeah! Giving up
songwriting to produce?
Buying a new house?
We know you've done
all of this for us.
We love you, Dave!
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
(ALL CHEERING)
Happy Birthday, Dwayne.
It's Dave!
(MUSIC CONTINUES)
I got 40 cheese pizzas here
for a, uh, Theodore.
Whoo-hoo! Pay the man, Si.
Whoo!
ALVIN: Redfoo!
You ready to rock this party
with a little Party Rock?
Oh, you like the classics.
But I got a new one for you,
Juicy Wiggle!
This is my jizz-am!
(CROWD CHEERING)
Ooh, cool!
I walked into the party
r I seen somethin' I never saw
Everybody was movin',
groovin'
Girls, they were
dancin' on the bar
Now this wasn't
no ordinary dance
Hey, man, why is everybody
swimmin' in a trance?
I couldn't figure it out
like your grandpa's riddle
I asked 'em what they doin'
and they said...
ALL: Juicy wiggle!
Now move your hips
and dance like fish
(MUSIC PLAYING)
MAN: Get juicy
Get juicy
Yeah, get juicy
ALL: Get juicy
Get juicy
Get juicy
ALVIN: Get juicy!
REDFOO:
Two girls was shakin' it
I jumped in the middle
I asked 'em what we doin'
and they said...
Juicy Wiggle!
Get juicy
Oh, yeah! I'm in.
Show 'em what you got, Theo!
(EXCLAIMING)
THEODORE: (EXCLAIMS) Whoo-hoo!
Get juicy
He's so smooth.
Yeah, get juicy
Whoo! Yeah!
Whoo-whee!
Now I done
just lost my mind
Is that safe?
No, it is absolutely not.
DAVID: What the...
Um, excuse me, young lady?
The launch ramp is closed.
MAN: Hey, Simon's gonna go!
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
No, no, no, I'm not going.
I was just explaining
that this is really...
(SCREAMS) High!
(CROWD EXCLAIMS) Oh!
(GASPS)
That was awesome!
I'm definitely going again.
(CHEERING)
(SIGHS) Boys.
Whoo!
Get juicy
When I say "Party,"
you say "Alvin!"
Party!
ALL: Alvin!
Party!
Alvin!
ALVIN: Party!
Alvin!
Um...
Surprise?
Whoo-hoo!
Uh-oh.
Oh, boy.
Uh, if anyone needs us,
we'll just be...
(WHISPERS) Across the country.
Over there, come on.
Party's over.
Oh, thank you.
Yeah, that's mine.
Oh, you had to grab
one last one?
Yeah.
Okay.
Enjoy that, yeah.
Were you surprised?
No, I wasn't surprised,
and you wanna know why?
Because #Davesparty
was trending on Twitter.
Nice!
I mean, sorry.
I know my work schedule
is tough.
But I thought you guys
were old enough
to take care of yourselves.
But I guess you're
not mature enough for that.
That's insulting.
We are very mature.
(THEODORE FARTS)
(CHUCKLES) Sorry. Pizza toots.
Look, I'm trying to start
a new chapter in my life.
A more stable chapter...
where you guys
aren't performing
in a different city
every night.
But, we love to perform.
You can go back to that,
just not now, okay?
I want you guys
to have a few years
of being normal kids.
But we're not
normal kids, Dave.
ALVIN: Yeah...
we're multi-platinum singing
chipmunks! Oops.
Well, right now,
you're acting like
a bunch of animals...
who just threw a giant house
party without my permission.
Does this mean
no miniature golf tomorrow?
It should, and normally,
it would.
But, you're gonna give us
one last chance, right?
I think he means
our 158th last chance?
Look, selfishly,
I wanna spend as much time
with you guys as I can...
before I have to go to
Ashley's album release
in Miami.
Whoo-hoo!
We're going to Miami!
Come on, shake
your body, baby, do the conga
I know you can't control
yourself any longer
Feel the rhythm of the music
getting stronger 4'
Theodore, get our Speedos!
Yeah!
No, no Speedos.
I'm going to Miami.
I only got a plus one,
so it wouldn't be fair
to pick favorites.
Shh...
We both know
I'm your favorite. (CHUCKLES)
(SIGHS) Alvin.
Tied for favorite?
You don't even have to
say with who.
Blink once for Theodore,
twice for Simon.
Got it, no favorites.
SIMON: Wind, 35 degrees,
out of the northwest.
Okay, tail up.
10, 10 degrees down.
Shoulders up, shoulders down.
Shoulders to the left,
shoulders to the right.
Tail in, tail out.
Ah. While we're young, Simon.
Loosen the grip,
loosen the grip.
Not too loose,
not too loose, Simon.
Any day, now.
And...
my concentration is broken.
Now I have to start all over.
Oh, great!
Let's start this
charade again.
THEODORE: Oh, come on!
This isn't the PGA Tour,
Simon.
Exactly. But this
is what it's all about.
Just 4 dudes
playing some golf.
Actually, that reminds me,
uh...
I invited a friend to join us.
Oh, is this
the famous Samantha
we've been hearing
so much about?
It is.
SIMON: David!
Ooh la la. (KISSING)
(CHUCKLES MISCHIEVOUSLY)
Dave and Samantha
sittin' in a tree...
Very funny, guys.
Anyway, it's starting to feel
kind of serious, so...
I thought an introduction
would be nice.
You must really
like this girl, Dave.
I do,
and I hope you guys do, too.
Yeah. Any girlfriend of yours
is a girlfriend of ours.
That sounded
way less weird in my head.
You think?
(PHONE BEEPS)
She's here.
How do I look?
Well, uh...
You know? Looks. (CHUCKLES)
Alvin! This is no time
for honesty.
THEODORE: You look great,
Dave.
That sweater makes you look
like a cozy grandpa.
Thanks, Theodore.
Okay, where was I?
Shoulders up, shoulders down.
Oh, brother.
Hit the ball, already!
Okay!
SIMON: (GASPS)
Look at it soar!
Follow me, come on guys!
ALVIN: WOW.
Awesome!
Come on!
(THEODORE LAUGHS)
ALVIN: Follow the ball!
Through the mouth!
THEODORE: Open wide!
Whoo-hoo!
SIMON: Hurry up!
(ALVIN SHOUTS)
Hurry, Theodore!
I'm going as fast as I can!
SIMON: Turn, turn!
My wind calculations
were accurate!
Come On, guys!
Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh!
It's a hole-in...
(SHOUTING) No! Why?
Excuse me,
that's my brother's ball.
Oh, uh, this ball?
No, no, this is my ball.
What? I just hit
that beautiful shot.
Tell you what,
let's compromise,
and we'll call it...
no one's ball.
ALVIN: Hey!
I'm warning you.
You mess with one of us,
you mess with all of us.
Yeah!
Aw.
I'm terrified.
(MOCKINGLY) Ah!
What, what? Ouch! Wait!
What are you gonna do?
We will continue this
conversation when I'm back.
MAN: Hey, dude,
it's your turn.
Oh, yeah.
Whatever!
I don't even need that ball!
Si's right,
you're not worth it!
Yeah!
SIMON: Oh, Dave,
thank goodness.
ALVIN: Hey, Dave.
Hey, guys. This is Samantha.
Sam, these are my boys.
Hi.
Hi.
That's Theodore.
He might be the smallest,
but he's got
the biggest heart.
Hi.
Ooh, we've heard
a lot about you.
Enchant.
(LAUGHS) I can tell
that you're trouble.
If by "trouble,"
you mean "irresistible,"
then guilty as charged.
Alvin, of course.
And there's Simon.
So, you're a doctor?
I am.
Did Dave mention that?
(CHUCKLES) No, you're wearing
a stethoscope.
Yes, I am.
That's embarrassing.
SIMON: Would it
be okay if I tried it?
Yeah, knock yourself out.
Oh, thank you.
Heart rate is smooth
and steady, 400 BPM.
So, it's beating?
Of course it's beating.
It's so nice to finally
meet you guys.
Oh, and this is my son, Miles.
Son?
Oh, no.
You guys have a lot in common.
Miles is also a musician.
Yeah, I've heard
you're pretty good.
Thanks, Mr. Seville.
Oh, brother.
We thought this
was the perfect place
for you guys to get to know
each other better.
DAVID: Yes, so behave, okay?
And Theo, get down from there.
I'll get him.
So, back to our conversation.
No hard feelings, huh?
Hey, YOU guys having fun?
(NERVOUSLY) Yeah, just
getting some cotton candy.
All right.
(SIMON CHATTERING)
This is not my idea of fun.
Mmm...
Yummy.
(SLURPS)
Theo!
SIMON: Alvin,
where did Theodore go?
ALVIN: I don't know, I haven't
seen him since the last hole.
What do you think?
Uh, 20 bucks seems like
a lot of money for a chipmunk.
He's a talking chipmunk.
Go on, plump and juicy,
say something.
Um, I also sing.
Ooh...
Yeah, yeah, yeah... a'
This isn't like Theo,
to wander off.
I know.
MILES: Why don't you
check the river?
Chip shot!
Whoa!
Alvin, I found him.
Give us back our brother!
Yeah!
I just paid 20 bucks for him.
He's not for sale!
I want 40.
What?
He's a talking chipmunk.
I also sing.
Theo! You're not helping.
I like big butts
and I cannot lie
You other
brothers can't deny
When a girl walks in
with an itty bitty waist
And a round
thing in your face
You get sprung,
wanna pull up tough
'Cause you notice
that butt was stuffed
Ah. Fine!
ALVIN: I hope you're happy,
Theodore.
That was all of our allowance.
THEODORE: Sorry.
I was born to perform.
Great news, fellas.
You get to hang
with Miles all day.
And the hits
just keep on coming. Oh.
Sam got a page
from the hospital,
so I'm going to take you four
to the studio with me.
All right, be good.
Bye, Mom.
Bye, honey.
Don't forget your stethoscope.
Oh, yeah.
SAMANTHA: Oh.
You know what? Keep it.
SIMON: Thanks.
Break a leg.
That doesn't really apply
to doctors, Dave.
Right.
Good luck!
You kind of hope your heart
surgeon doesn't need luck.
Uh... Have fun!
(CHUCKLES) Nailed it!
Look, paparazzi.
I guess they heard
we were coming.
Hey, guys!
Ah, it is good to see you.
Can you get one more
from this side?
Yeah.
Guys, they aren't
here for you, come on.
There she is! Ashley!
(CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING)
Oh my love
Let me be your fire
We're a thousand miles up
And I'm 'bout to get higher
Feel my heart beating
Out my chest
You're the only prayer I
need To make me feel blessed
Oh my love
Let me be your fire
We're a thousand miles up
And I'm 'bout to get higher 4'
Hey!
What the heck?
Oh, nice, Miles.
Ugh! Yuck!
(PAPARAZZI CLAMORING)
Oh, no!
Hey!
Ow!
(EXCLAIMING)
Hey, down here!
Watch it, hey!
That's my tail!
ASHLEY: Excuse me.
First, can you guys apologize
for trampling my friends?
Aw, sorry about that, guys.
Thank you, Ashley.
Sure.
MAN: Miss Grey, when
are you going back on tour?
Miss Grey, over here.
Oh, hey, you know what?
Let me,
let me get this for you.
Oh, you know,
I think it's "Push."
(CHUCKLES) Oh, yeah,
you know, of course.
Whoa. Okay.
Looks like Mr. Macho isn't
as cool as he thinks he is.
Hey! Hello, you know
You're making me love sick
You like my dynamite
I'm like tick tick a'
Oh, man.
I didn't realize
how boring it is
to be on this side
of the glass.
Yeah, why aren't
you guys in there?
I thought you were, like,
super famous or something?
One day, you're throwing back
pink lemonades
on Diddy's yacht
in Saint-Tropez...
THEODORE: Ooh, jackpot!
...and the next,
you're eating stale chips
you find in the couch.
(SIGHS) I miss it.
Uh, uh... Theodore, couch
chips are for talent only.
Oh.
Really, Barry?
All right, you can keep it.
Just don't tell anyone, okay?
Whoo-hoo! Yum.
SAMANTHA'. We did it!
We successfully introduced
our kids to each other.
And then, you performed
open-heart surgery.
Please, after being
a single mom
and a med student,
I could do this in my sleep.
And I wore my stethoscope
out again, didn't I?
I thought it was cute.
And I like people to know
I'm dating a doctor.
All right, I guess my life
is a little more hectic
than I'd like to admit.
I get it.
So, I have to ask. The boys?
Are they, like,
your adopted kids, or...
How does that work?
I don't know, I never really
thought about it.
What?
They're lucky to have you.
Crazy idea.
Have you ever been to Miami?
(AMERICAN IDOL THEME PLAYING)
MAN: This is American Idol!
I'm sorry
to have to do this...
but you're going to Hollywood!
Ah. I've always
wanted to say that!
Why did they get to move out
and do all this cool stuff?
Uh, well, Alvin...
girls are
scientifically proven
to mature faster than boys.
ALVIN: Ah, whatever.
Hey, guys.
SIMON: Dave!
THEODORE: Hi.
Sorry I'm late.
I had to pick up
a few things on the way home.
ALVIN: No worries,
we've just been ruminating
on why we still live at home.
So, what'd you guys
think of Samantha?
Oh, she's awesome.
We loved her.
Ooh, leftovers.
(GRUNTING)
Ooh, I can't wait.
Oh, I can taste it.
Yes! Yummy.
Oh. I can't eat this.
Whoa! That is a serious
engagement ring.
Wait a second. That means
Dave is going to ask
Samantha to marry him.
Hold on, we don't know that.
They've only been together
a few months,
so you're probably
overreacting.
But what if it's true?
Uh-oh. Here he comes.
Act casual.
(CHANTING)
DAVID: Huh.
What are you guys doing?
Uh, yoga. Downward munk?
Well, that's great
to hear that
you guys like Samantha,
because.
She's gonna become
a big part of my life.
Oh, and good news.
My plus one
isn't going to waste.
She is coming
to Miami with me.
(CLUCKS)
I'm standing right here.
I can hear what he's saying.
I've always wanted a mom.
ALVIN: Guys...
...if Samantha is our mom,
that makes Miles...
Our brother.
THEODORE: No!
Deep breaths, Theodore.
In and out.
It's going to be okay.
What are we gonna do?
ALVIN: Guys, it's time.
Operation ring retrieval
is a go.
No ring, no proposal.
No proposal, no Miles.
Theo, fall in line, soldier.
Oh, brother.
(CAWING)
Alvin, what...
Are we doing a charade?
Oh, cool. Two words.
No.
First down? What are you...
Two syllables. Sounds like.
Is it a movie? First word.
A song?
Angry.
(GROWLS) Get over here.
Okay-
Still no idea
what you're saying.
Theodore, you keep
an eye on Dave.
Simon and I will get the ring.
(MOANS)
(GRUNTS)
Uh-oh.
(GRUNTS) There you are.
Alvin, grab this.
(GRUNTING)
(SNEEZES)
Let's do this.
Yes!
The bag's gone.
No.
You mean that bag over there?
ALVIN: And I'm back to "Yes."
(ALARM RINGS)
Uh-oh.
And right back to "No."
Abort. Abort. Let's go.
Guys...
what are you doing in here?
Uh... Well... We...
just wanted to spend
as much time as possible
with you before
you left for Miami.
Yeah.
All right.
I'll make breakfast.
Whoo-hoo! I love breakfast.
Alvin, grab it.
Ooh, ooh, Belgian waffles,
pancakes. So excited.
Okay, guys...
Miss Price from next door,
she's gonna peek in on you...
make sure you're all right.
What? She's nuts.
We should be the ones
checking in on her.
Well, after that big party
you guys threw...
I don't feel very comfortable
with you guys
staying here unsupervised.
You got it?
(BELL RINGS)
Oh, that must be
Samantha and Miles.
(COUGHING)
Miles?
Yeah, he's going to stay
with you guys for a few days.
So, you don't feel comfortable
leaving us alone,
but you're okay leaving us
with that psychopath?
No, he's a great kid.
It'll be fun.
You know, it'll be, uh,
a good bonding experience
for you guys.
Uh, I'm pretty sure
Miles would interpret
"bonding experience"
as super-gluing us together.
Hi.
Wow. Great place.
Oh, thanks.
Make yourself at home.
Mi casa, su casa.
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
Thank you, David, that's very
generous of you to open your home.
Wow. That's really impressive.
I actually don't
speak Spanish.
SIMON: He said that it's
very generous
of you to open your home.
(CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
I also speak Spanish.
And you're not fooling anyone
with your good boy routine.
I'm fooling everyone.
They have no idea that I'm going
to make you my personal servant.
(MILES LAUGHS)
All right. I guess this is it.
Have a great weekend, guys.
And boys...
try to show me you can handle
some independence, okay?
All right, bye, sweetie.
Be good.
Okay.
All right. Here we go.
I can feel the bonding
happening already.
(LAUGHS)
We're gonna be doing
tons of bonding.
Where's the Super Glue?
(MUSIC PLAYING)
ALVIN: Miles, if we're going
to make this work,
we need to talk.
Feels like it's working.
But, good talk.
You can't shut us out forever.
He means emotionally, but...
I want to focus
on the physically
shutting us out
of our own home part.
I have to pee.
You guys are so naive.
Trust me, this thing with
Dave and my mom is temporary.
If by temporary you mean,
"till death do they part"...
then yeah. Totally temporary.
What are you talking about?
He's talking
about marriage, Miles.
Wedding bells.
Dave liked it and he's
gonna put a ring on it.
A bag of tissue.
What?
Scandalous.
It's gone.
Uh. He must have
packed the ring
last night before bed.
(GASPS) He's going to
propose to Samantha in Miami.
So you think we're
all gonna become, like,
one big happy family?
No one said happy.
No offense to your mom.
She actually seems
quite wonderful.
Yeah. It's you
we're not thrilled about.
Well, the feeling is mutual.
And you guys
can keep Dave too.
My dad died when I was little
and I've done
just fine without one.
Oh. I'm sorry, Miles.
Don't be. I didn't know him.
If Dave and my mom
do get married...
they'll wanna have
their own kids.
And you're not even
Dave's real sons...
you're just a bunch
of chipmunks
that he calls his kids.
Before you guys know it,
you'll be back
out in the forest.
Holding your nuts all winter.
Hey.
First of all,
that's what squirrels do.
We are chipmunks.
Um, Alvin,
chipmunks do that too.
And the fact that
I didn't know that...
is exactly why we cannot
end up back in the forest.
But... Dave wouldn't
do that to us.
MILES: He already has.
Why do you think you guys are
here and my mom's in Miami?
Meeting of the Munks.
I don't want Miles to be right
any more than you do,
but it all kind of lines up.
New job, new house,
new girlfriend, new family.
I don't want to go back
to the forest.
And I am definitely not going
to end up related to that guy.
(BELCHING)
Hmm. Nice form.
Here's the deal, Miles.
We all go to Miami
to stop this proposal...
and then we never have to
see each other again.
I'm in.
Can't get you chipmunks
out of my life fast enough.
That's the smartest thing
you've said
since we met you.
THEODORE: Are you sure there's
enough money
in your piggy bank?
Guys, it's a credit card.
We'll get 4 tickets.
Stop worrying.
Hello, boys.
ALL: Hey, Miss Price.
I'm supposed to be
keeping an eye on you...
So I think I'll use...
this one.
(LAUGHING)
How are we gonna get to Miami
if she's gonna be watching us?
Guys, I have a plan.
(GROANS) The 4 words
society fears most.
I can't believe that worked.
It wasn't so much me
as it was the peanuts
dipped in cough syrup.
(SNORING GENTLY)
That's really messed up.
Respect.
Thank you!
Alvin, these aren't
even chipmunks.
They're squirrels.
ALVIN: Beggars
can't be choosers.
Besides, once we put them
in the shirts
from the Alvin, Simon
and Theodore dolls...
Miss Price won't be able to
tell the difference.
Yeah, let's do it.
Ooh, oh... I get to change me!
I can't believe
I maxed out my mom's
entire card
in this one ticket.
We're fine.
Just stick to the plan.
I'm starting to think I should
go through cargo with Theo.
Shh.
Be silent. Be still.
And you. Get in there.
Ow! Easy!
Both of you guys.
ALVIN: Watch the zipper.
Next!
Who knows what
you're carrying in this thing.
(MEOWS)
(DOGS BARKING)
Go on through.
Whoa!
What's that?
That is a...
stuffed Alvin doll.
You know, from that lame
singing chipmunks group.
Um, yeah.
I'm gonna need to see what's
in that backpack, please.
Oh, no.
Yeah. (GRUNTS)
Um, it's just a doll.
Chucky was just a doll.
(CLEARS THROAT)
This is Alvin.
It's what the "A" is for.
He does a lot of bending
and back up.
He does splits.
(ALVIN SQUEALS)
He can twist.
Like Linda Blair almost.
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
You can use it
as a weight-loss device.
(GURGLING)
I can feel the sweat.
It even talks.
It says,
"I'm a dumb stupid-head."
Sorry, the batteries
might be a bit low.
Ow! I'm a dumb stupid-head!
(LAUGHS)
So, he's... Ow!
And it bites.
I think that was just
a design flaw.
There's probably a recall.
You can put the doll
back in the bag.
Not the dark place!
What I am gonna need...
is for you to take a step
right over there...
because we're gonna need to
do a quick body search.
Body search?
Body search!
ALVIN: Good luck, Simon!
Yeah.
Okay-
(GASPS)
Oh, no.
Where to hide, where to hide?
Relax.
Put your arms out.
They're out.
(MOANS SOFTLY)
One last spot to get.
SIMON: I don't wanna
go to jail.
I don't wanna go to jail!
(GASPS)
That's not mine.
You just holding it
for a friend?
SIMON: No, no,
not that, not that. (GRUNTS)
I don't get paid enough.
Get out of here.
ALVIN: Real smooth, Simon.
I'm sorry!
I just, I got so nervous.
You are lucky I don't flush
the both of you
down the toilet!
SIMON: Well, I'm glad we sent
Theodore to Baggage.
He never would have
made it through Security.
Wow! Hi, everyone!
Cold in here, isn't it?
THEODORE: Whoa!
(EXCLAIMING)
(SCREAMS)
Miles, will you ask
a flight attendant
for some peanuts?
We're hungry.
Yeah. I too would
love a water.
But no ice.
It's supposed to be filthy.
Ooh, which reminds me.
(SINGSONG) Germs,
germs, go away,
don't come back
any other day, okay.
Shut up and stay out of sight.
SIMON: Hey! Easy!
It smells in here.
If you're not gonna feed us,
I'm going to forage.
Not a great idea, Alvin.
We're not legitimate
passengers!
(SNIFFS) Ugh!
Oops! Sorry!
(GASPS)
I didn't mean to startle you.
(CHUCKLES) I'm not startled.
It's just you're...
You're you.
(CHUCKLES) I am me.
And, you know,
if you have a pen...
I'm always happy to
sign an autograph for a fan.
(LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)
I'm not a fan.
Okay-
Well, um, I'll be seeing you.
Excuse me! Pardon me!
Coming through.
Now where in this tin can
can I get some snacks?
On, baby!
(GRUNTING)
Hi! I'm Theodore.
Shh.
(MONKEY CHATTERS)
Inside voice.
Please stop.
You're gonna make
the other animals nervous!
Uh, okay, I'll let you out.
But you have to promise
to go back in before we land.
(CHATTERS)
(GRUNTS)
Got it. There you go!
Oh! Thank you, friend.
(SCREECHING)
Hey!
Please, everyone relax!
Um, Mister Monkey? Wha...
Wait! Don't do that.
No. Bad monkey!
(MOCKING)
I asked you to stop!
Hey! Please!
I'm begging you, Monkey Man!
(CHOMPING)
(SLURPING)
What?
You've never seen a chipmunk
in first class before?
Uh, actually, I recently flew
next to The Chipettes
and they were ladies.
Hey. Don't judge me.
I saw Pink Flamingos.
Excuse me.
May I see your boarding pass?
Yeah, well,
funny thing about that.
Ha! Gotta run!
Come here.
Get back here!
(WOMAN SCREAMS)
Simon! Run!
Where? We're on a plane.
I don't know! Come on.
Freeze!
Air marshal.
Don't move.
SIMON: Can we move now?
This is a very
hard pose to hold.
(MONKEY CHATTERING)
What's that?
ALVIN: Uh-Oh.
This can't be good.
What the...
What? What?
All right!
Everybody calm down!
It's just a monkey. All right?
Birds! Birds!
(WINGS FLAPPING)
Help! Someone save me!
(BARKING)
Nice doggy...
Theo! Over here! Jump!
Birds and dogs!
Oh, my God!
Okay, now there's a goat.
(BLEATING)
And an otter.
And an otter! God!
MAN: Uh, ladies and gentlemen,
this is your captain speaking.
Listen!
We're going to be making an...
emergency landing
in Austin, Texas
due to a herd of
chinchillas in the cockpit.
All right, you heard him!
The plane's going down.
(ALL SCREAMING)
Not down like down-down.
Safely-safely.
We're not crashing!
You people are idiots!
We're all gonna die!
What an idiot!
Oh, great speech, Churchill.
You better watch it!
Do you know who
you're talking to?
I am the police of the sky!
(MACAW SQUAWKS)
Really?
AGENT SUGGS: Okay.
Let's make sure
we have everything.
You released animals
from cargo,
and then you forced
an emergency landing.
We also snuck onto the plane.
Uh-huh. That's right.
Theodore!
That is three major
infractions on one flight.
Here's a fun fact.
That's three more infractions
than I've ever had
in all my years
as an air marshal.
Congratulations on such
a distinguished career, sir.
Did you hear that?
Because of that
"distinguished career"...
I've got a meeting
with Homeland Security
next week about a promotion.
Another congratulations, sir.
Shut up!
What do you think
they're gonna bring up
when they interview me, huh?
My decade
of perfect service...
or that one time
that three chipmunks
turned my flight
into Noah's Ark?
Probably the time
with the chipmunks.
Yeah.
Um, I meant the other one.
Look, sir, what could
we possibly have done
to make you hate us so much?
(BANGS TABLE)
I'll tell you what you did.
Whoa!
Holy Christmas.
(CHIPMUNKS SONG PLAYING)
I got a little
early gift for you.
(LAUGHS)
Oh, James.
You shouldn't have.
No. Wait a second.
I want to lnstagram
a video of your reaction.
Merry Christmas!
I'm breaking up with you!
What?
Thanks.
And The Chipmunks?
Grow up, James.
(MUMBLING) Wait.
(CHIPMUNKS LAUGHING)
(SCREAMS)
Awkward .
You provided the soundtrack
to my heartbreak.
But now it's payback time.
I am putting you three on the
No-Fly List.
What? No!
But we have to get to Miami!
You can't do that!
You see, I'm an air marshal.
I'm all-powerful...
I'm all-seeing...
and I'm all-knowing.
Then you obviously know
you just made
that entire speech...
with your tie
in a cup of coffee.
Okay. (GRUNTS)
I'll be back in two minutes.
You also still have a little
parrot poop on your shirt.
10 minutes.
And one more thing.
Don't even think
about leaving.
I have a very particular
set of skills.
Skills that I have acquired
over a very long...
You just put your hand
on an ink pad.
15 minutes.
(GASPS)
(SIGHS)
Whoa. That guy is the mayor
of Crazy Town.
We gotta get you out of here,
now. Let's go.
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, this is gonna be
the best...
Come on!
AGENT SUGGS: Really?
Nobody runs on
Agent James Suggs.
Come on. Come on. Go.
MILES: Here you go.
Thanks so much.
Well, that's as far
as my money takes us.
Which puts us 2 hours
and 30 minutes from Miami.
Hey!
ALVIN: Yes!
THEODORE: All right!
By plane.
Oh. Come on!
Guys, the party
is in three days.
We need to get to Miami. Fast.
And, as if we're not in enough
trouble already, it's Dave.
Oh, man.
Well, we cannot
possibly pick up.
We have to pick up,
or Dave will know
something is wrong.
Dave's gonna know
something's wrong
when he sees us standing
around a bunch of trash cans,
in a parking lot
in the middle of nowhere!
Hmm. Good point.
Ready to go eat?
Uh... Yeah.
Everything okay?
Let me check on something.
Hello?
Hi, it's Dave. Are you busy?
Oh, hi, Dave.
No, I'm not busy at all.
No, I'm just dining
with a friend.
What do you need?
All right, I'm gonna
take a look.
I'm right at the window.
Oh, no!
They've eaten everything!
And I mean everything!
Yeah, that sounds about right.
Just like a guinea pig
Armageddon!
Well, thanks for checking
on them, Miss Price.
(SCREAMS)
False alarm.
Sounds like
they're having a blast.
Oh, good.
You ready?
Yeah.
Um, Alvin, I think maybe we
should go somewhere else.
Whoa, hey. Sorry, fellas.
21 and over.
But it's dark outside,
and we don't have
anywhere else to go.
Well, I wish I could
help you out,
but I got a bar
packed with people...
waiting to hear a band
whose singer is stuck 50 miles
from here with a flat tire.
So, unless you guys know
anyone who can carry a tune...
I'm gonna have to
bid you good night.
How would you feel
about some singing chipmunks?
Whoa! You guys really
know The Chipettes?
Uh... Really?
Please welcome, all the way
from Los Angeles,
California...
The Chipmunks.
Ooh!
Warm crowd.
So, can you really play?
Can you really sing?
(GUITAR PLAYING)
Whoo! Put your hands
together for me.
Um! Feels good.
Come on, bass.
Uh-huh.
More guitar.
My man on drums.
We're taking it to the verse.
Ain't no place
It ain't going on
It's going around
Like a Vagabond
It gets in your bones
Like you caught the flu
Nah, there ain't no cure
You just gotta move
when you feel the groove
Now people on the left
From the left now
I Shake your south side
People on the right
Let me hear you say
I Shake your south side
Every single girl
Where my ladies at?
Shake your south side
All around the world
Shake your south side
Guitar!
MAN: Whoo!
This is where your guy said he
dropped off the little freaks?
Yeah. That'll be 76 bucks.
Okay. I'm law enforcement,
so... (LAUGHS)
Great. 76 bucks.
Uh, let me rephrase that.
I'm the police of the sky.
But we're on the ground
and this is a car.
So...
76 bucks.
So, that means nothing to you?
Nope.
Okay, I'll be right back.
Don't leave.
The money!
I'm getting it!
Every single girl
I Shake your south side
I All around the world
I Shake your south side I
(CROWD CHEERING)
Yeah!
Oh, it's on.
(GASPS) Alvin,
we've got a problem.
Oh, no.
I'll distract him,
you guys make a run for it.
I'll meet you outside.
How dare you!
ALVIN: Over here.
Gotcha!
Ah!
(CLEARS THROAT)
Let me explain.
I have a reason to believe
there's a fugitive chipmunk
in your beard.
You don't think
I'd know if there was
an animal living in my beard?
I don't.
Beard peanuts?
Gotcha!
Uh-oh.
Ow!
Watch where
you're throwing people!
What are you
gonna do about it?
(GRUNTING)
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
I am so sorry.
Yeah, sorry about the fight.
Ain't no apology necessary.
Nothing better for business
than a good old-fashioned
bar brawl.
Good luck, outlaws.
Thanks.
Hey, hey, hey.
Come on, keep it in there!
Yikes!
(THE GOOD, THE BAD
AND THE UGLY PLAYING)
(EXCLAIMING)
Ha! (LAUGHS)
You come on!
(YELLING)
I will slice and dice you
like spicy sushi roll!
(CHUCKLES) Missed me!
Ha! Ha!
You want some
butter with that?
(GURGLING)
Drinks are on you!
(LAUGHING)
What?
Ow, ow, ow...
(SCREAMS)
So long, Suggsy!
Get out of the way,
hillbillies!
I need to get out
of this bar ASAP!
Hey, we gotta get out of here.
SIMON: But where's Alvin?
We're gonna leave, man!
I'm waiting on a guy
that owes me 76 bucks.
Ah!
MILES: You mean that guy?
You know what,
we'll double it.
All right.
But Alvin's not here yet!
Forget about him, let's go!
Wait, wait!
There he is, there he is!
You...
Come on, let's go, come on!
Come on, Alvin!
Hurry, hurry!
(ALVIN PANTING)
Miles, give me your belt.
You little hood rats!
Alvin, run!
I will hunt you down!
THEODORE: Slow down!
Move your furry little feet!
SIMON: Alvin, let's go!
Hurry, Alvin!
I will pounce on you!
Alvin, jump!
Hurry up, Alvin, come on!
I will... (GROANS)
Whoopsie.
...take a little nap.
MILES: So, how much
is this gonna cost?
CAB DRIVER: To the nearest
bus station, $32.
MILES: Oh,
we're a little short.
How short?
About 32 bucks.
(BRAKES SCREECHING)
Have a nice night.
Easy for you to say.
You're not the one
who has to sleep outside!
Thanks for nothing!
Drive safely!
What?
I hope he gets home safe.
THEODORE: Ouch!
ALVIN: (GROANS) I got
a splinter in my tail.
Ow!
Ow!
I can't sleep
without my pillow.
Ow!
I don't suppose they make
Tempur-Pedic tree branches,
do they?
(SIGHS) Seriously, guys?
You're the ones who
are supposed to be
comfortable sleeping in trees,
not me.
We're not talking to you,
okay?
Not after you tried
to leave me behind!
First, awesome, because
I don't wanna
talk to you either.
And second, you guys would've
done the same thing to me.
ALVIN: No, Miles, we actually
would have waited for you.
Yeah, we're in this together.
You mess with one of us,
you mess with all of us.
I've heard your lame
family motto, man.
It's a bunch of crap.
People look out
for themselves.
It's biology,
it's what animals do.
Well, on behalf of
animals everywhere...
I find your
attitude insulting.
Call it whatever you want,
man. It's true.
What, you think my dad was
thinking about anyone
other than himself...
when he left me and my mom?
SIMON: But, I...
I thought you said
your dad was...
(SIGHS)
Right, um...
He might as well have.
He left when I was only five.
Sorry, Miles.
Whatever.
I don't care, you know?
I've done just fine
without him.
ALVIN: Miles, listen.
If Dave and your mom
end up together...
he's a good person.
He would never bail on you.
Then why are you
making this trip?
Right.
Because you think
he's gonna ditch you, too.
Look, dads are overrated.
Eventually, you will
get over him leaving.
Really?
Yeah.
And meet me there
Bundles of flowers
We wait through
The hours of cold
Shelter as we go X
(THEODORE PANTING)
Oh.
I can't...
I'm too tired.
MILES: Dude!
Are you joking?
I can still see the tree!
ALVIN: Oh. Huh.
Come on, it's 10 miles
to the bus station.
Can't you go any faster?
Um, not to split hairs,
but given that our legs
are 90% shorter than yours...
(GROANS)
...we're technically walking
384% faster than you are.
Nerd alert!
Oh.
Um...
Fine.
Come on up.
(SIGHS) Really?
Changing my mind in three...
All right!
Yes!
Two...
one.
Come on, come on!
Whoo-hoo!
Oh, thank you.
Oh, sweet!
Now this is quite
an efficient way to travel.
Yeah. I could go for miles
on Miles.
Oh, my God, that's so bad.
Then why are you laughing?
Because that was so bad.
I think that joke
missed by miles.
(MILES LAUGHS)
(CHIPMUNKS SINGING)
My grandma and your grandma
I Sittin' by the fire
My grandma told your grandma
"I'm gonna
set your flag on fire"
Talkin' 'bout hey now!
Hey now!
Hey now!
4' Hey now!
lko, lko, un-day
Jock-a-mo fee-no ai na-na
Jock-a-mo fee na-na
(LAUGHING)
See that man
all dressed in green
Hey!
lko, lko, un-day
He is a man
He's a lovin' machine
Hey
r Jock-a mo fee na-na
Talkin' 'bout hey now!
Hey now! Hey now!
Hey now!
lko, lko, un-day
Jock-a-mo fee-no ai na-na
Jock-a-mo fee na-na
(GIGGLING)
Yeah, this is where I
dropped them, all right.
Look how obvious
these tracks are.
(LAUGHS)
Amateurs.
lko, lko, un-day
Jock-a-mo fee-no ai na-na
Jock-a-mo fee na-na
Talkin' 'bout hey now!
Hey HOW! Hey now!
4' Hey now!
lko, lko, un-day
Jock-a-mo fee-no ai na-na
Jock-a-mo fee na-na
Only 863 miles to go.
Did some chipmunks
jump on your bus?
Um-hmm. They bought a ticket
to New Orleans.
You know
that's not normal, right?
Jock-a-mo fee na-na
Jock-a-mo fee na-na
Jock-a-mo fee na-na
(CROWD CHEERING)
All right! Nice!
All right! A tater tot!
Looks like our luck is finally
turning around.
It's not.
Oh, no! Suggs?
Hello, boys.
How did you find us?
(LAUGHS)
I'm an air marshal!
Law enforcement's my life.
Now, we can either do this
the easy way...
or the hard way.
My brothers and I would like
to discuss our options.
You only got one option.
Chipmunk jail.
With tiny little bars,
and a tiny little barbed wire
fence, and a tiny toilet...
and a tiny yard where you can
lift your tiny little weights!
It sounds adorable.
Hey!
Guys, slingshot. On three.
One, two, three!
Now, I don't have all night.
ALVIN: Oh, nuts.
We chose the hard way.
(SCREAMING SOFTLY)
Hope you're okay.
ALVIN: He's coming!
MILES: Watch out, gangway!
Hurry, Theodore, run!
Let's go! Come on, hurry up!
Excuse us!
Come on, Alvin! He's coming!
Go, Miles, go!
Excuse me, I'm sorry.
In here! Come on!
Whoo, I think we lost him.
Hey!
SIMON: Disregard.
Come back here!
(WHEN THE SAINTS GO MARCHING
PLAYING)
Excuse me, pardon me.
There's a crazy guy
chasing us!
(GROANS)
You look tired, baby.
Here you go.
Oh, thank you so much.
Nice one, Suggsy!
That tastes like fire!
It's moonshine.
Fire, please put it out!
Wash it down with this, here.
AGENT SUGGS: Um, ooh...
That's butterscotch.
Butterscotch liquor.
Ooh!
And moonshine!
Hi, Suggs!
Yes! (GROANS)
(LAUGHS)
Thank you, Mr. Trombone.
This calls for a celebration!
Hello, New Orleans!
Direct from our Austin
to Miami Comeback Tour,
we're The Chipmunks!
(CROWD CHEERING)
ls everybody ready
to get their funk on?
This hit
That ice cold
Michelle Pfeiffer
That white gold
This one for them good girls
Them good girls
Straight masterpiece
Stylin', wilin'
Livin' it up in the city
Got Chucks on
with Saint Laurent
Gotta kiss myself,
I'm so pretty
I'm too hot
Oh, yeah!
Call the police
and the fireman
Okay.
I'm too hot
Oh, yeah!
And my band 'bout that money
Break it down
Girls hit your hallelujah
Whoo
'Cause Uptown Funk
gon' give it to ya
'Cause Uptown Funk
gon' give it to ya
Saturday night
and we in the spot
Don't believe me just watch
Come on
Don't believe me just watch
Don't believe me just watch
Hey!
A' Hey!
Hey, oh!
Stop
Wait a minute
Fill my cup
Put some water in it
Take a sip, sign a check
Julio, Get the stretch!
Ride to Harlem, Hollywood,
Jackson, Mississippi
If we show up
We gon' show out
Smoother than
a fresh jar of Skippy
I'm too hot!
4' Oh, yeah!
What's happening?
What's happening?
Say my name
you know who I am
I'm too hot
4' Oh, yeah!
And my band 'bout that money
Break it down
Girls hit your hallelujah
Whoo
Girls hit your hallelujah
Whoo
'Cause Uptown Funk
gon' give it to ya
'Cause Uptown Funk
gon' give it to ya
Saturday night
and we in the spot
Don't believe me just watch
Come on
Yeah, come on!
Don't believe me just watch
5 Hey, hey, hey, Oh!
Uptown Funk it up,
Uptown Funk it up
(WHOOPING)
I said Uptown Funk it up,
Uptown Funk it up 4'
This whole day
has been incredible.
It's been the perfect day.
NEWS READER'. Coming up,
The Chipmunks are back.
What?
You heard me.
Alvin, Simon and Theodore...
Excuse me, could you
turn that up, please?
Yeah, sure.
...are making some noise
in the Big Easy...
When I say "Party,"
you say "Alvin!"
Party!
Alvin!
Oh, no.
Party!
Alvin!
Party!
DAVID: Alvin!
(ECHOING) Alvin!
Did you guys hear that?
Hear what?
Huh. Never mind.
Guys, last night was one
of the best nights of my life.
It was pretty crazy.
Even that Suggs guy
hung out with us.
Yeah, he's not
that bad after all.
Hey, we missed
a call from Dave.
And a text.
27 of them.
Uh-oh.
Oh, no.
(SNORING)
Where am I?
What is this?
(SCREAMS)
Suggs!
Who are you?
It's Vitto,
the band's manager, remember?
The only thing I remember
is being attacked
by a trombone.
Oh, right, yeah.
You got that crazy bump
on your head.
You didn't care, though.
You just wanted to party!
We hit every jazz club
in the Quarter.
What do you mean, "We"?
You, me, and those
dope chipmunk dudes!
I partied with
those tree-skunks?
They're the ones who dared you
to get that sassy tattoo!
What? What?
(GASPS)
How could I have let them
talk me into this?
Oh, no.
You asked for that one.
The other one was their idea.
What "other one"?
What?
(SHRIEKS SOFTLY)
This is where they told us
to meet them, right?
Well, yelled at us
to meet them.
Hopefully they had time to
cool off on the plane.
There you are.
Dave!
Dave!
Mom!
Don't "Dave, Mom" us.
You know what, Dave?
You're an artist,
and you're emotional...
and you follow your heart,
but maybe
I should take
the lead on this one.
You know,
we keep a level head.
Throw them a little Good Cop.
Okay-
Okay-
Don't you "Dave, Mom" us.
Do you have any idea
how terrifying it is...
to find out that your children
are 2,000 miles
away from where
they're supposed to be?
You are lucky that
there are witnesses,
because I am
so mad right now...
that I could just spit!
Okay, okay.
Right here, on this floor!
Okay, okay. Nice Good Cop.
Dave, I swear, it wasn't as
crazy as it looked on TV.
Oh, really?
Well, let me just
pull up some of
Theodore's tweets
from last night.
"Only one word
to describe this night,
"Crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy."
Or, "if you wanna get crazy,
"go to New Orleans.
It's the craziest."
Or, "In a New Orleans
Jazz Parade,
"so crazy."
We're really sorry, Dave.
Sorry's not gonna
cut it this time, guys.
If it were up to me,
we'd be going home,
but I gotta get back to Miami.
Do not smile.
You guys are grounded in Miami
and also when
we get back to LA.
(SCOFFS) When are we
not grounded?
You'll be so old,
your fur will be gray.
Yeah, that goes for
your fur too, Miles.
I don't have fur.
Well, whatever you have
is grounded...
for a long time. Let's go.
Huh. They didn't
kill us after all.
Feels like a win.
Hey, guys, Operation
"No Proposal" is still on.
Yeah!
All right!
High... Oh, fist.
Give me some.
Ow!
Oh, sorry.
Take it easy!
Guys, come on.
ALVIN: Jeez.
Yeah.
Here you go.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
And may I see your ID, please?
Yes.
Thank you.
Hey, um...
Are you sure about this?
Because if this
three-ring circus
is too scary for you,
I totally get it...
and we could just
go back to LA.
I mean, you wouldn't be
the first guy
to head for the hills once
we showed our crazy cards.
Please, your circus
only has one ring.
(MOCKING)
Stop looking at me.
DAVID: Mine's
the three-ringer.
You're the one
who should think
about heading for the hills.
I'm not going anywhere.
Except to get us a coffee.
(CHUCKLES)
I'll meet you at the gate.
Sir?
Is there a problem?
Problem? What problem?
There sure is.
Oh, man.
Oh, right.
Whoopsies.
That.
Guys.
Oh, nuts.
Seriously, guys,
the No-Fly List? Come on!
At least we're not
on the No-Drive List.
There's no such thing
as a No-Drive List, Theodore.
I'm sure you guys will
find a way to start one.
Let's not overreact, Dave.
The only reason we left home
in the first place...
Guys, not now, okay?
I worked my butt off
on Ashley's album,
and because of you three...
I might not even get to
the record release!
Not to mention, you've ruined
this trip for me and Samantha.
It's just, when you took
Samantha to Miami...
Theodore, I'm not
in the mood to hear it.
But Dave, we don't...
Alvin, don't.
You'll just make it worse.
Thank you for nothing.
Agent Suggs, Air Marshal.
I'll be with you
in a moment, sir.
Okay, you're gonna
regret that.
Did you help three chipmunks
get their rental car today?
Yeah, they came in.
With some guy,
probably their dad.
Probably not their dad,
because he's a human...
and they're chipmunks!
Hey!
Families come in all
shapes and sizes, sir.
It's not for me to judge.
We don't do that here,
at Miss Bee's.
Okay, this is how
it's gonna go down...
I need you to go back there,
and get me the GPS information
for that rental car.
We don't track
our rental cars, sir.
Oh! Is that so?
I work for the United States
government...
and we pretty much
track everything.
I know what you had
for lunch today.
Falafel!
Now scurry back there,
and get me the frequency
and uplink code
from that rental car.
Hey!
And I need the fastest set
of wheels you've got!
(HONKS)
Are you kidding me right now?
Do you know what this is?
This is a roller skate
with wheels.
Pretty sure roller skates
come with wheels.
Ah!
(YELLS)
It's like Tweety Bird!
Buckle up!
AGENT SUGGS: Shut up!
This is like driving
a parakeet!
Those rodents got
a 200-mile head start.
Time to roll up
some road, Suggs.
(EVIL LAUGHTER)
So say Geronimo!
Say Geronimo!
Say Geronimo!
Say Geronimo!
Say Geronimo! I
(SUGGS LAUGHING) Come on!
Fly, Bee! Fly!
ALVIN: Are we there yet?
DAVID: No.
Are we there yet?
No.
ALVIN: All right!
THEODORE: Awesome!
Remember, guys, we're here
to make a quick pit stop...
then we're getting
back on the road.
SIMON: Don't worry, Dave,
it'll be really quick.
THEODORE: Yeah, super quick.
Umm-hmm.
(SLURPING)
Thanks, Dave. I just needed
a little snack to get me
from lunch to dinner.
Oh, that's unusual.
SIMON: Don't be mad, Dave.
It would have been rude
to not order something.
Hey, guys! Look what I won!
Isn't he cute?
(DAVE LAUGHS)
Look at that face!
That's actually funny, Alvin.
I Say Geronimo!
I Say Geronimo! I
Whoa!
All right!
ALVIN: Now we're talking.
THEODORE: WOW.
Holy guacamole!
I could live here.
Hey, no smiling.
You're still grounded,
remember?
Thanks.
Thank you.
This is what
I'm talking about.
THEODORE: Hi.
Wow! Hola!
on, baby.
If this is grounded...
ground me for life.
Don't tempt me.
ALVIN: Hey, Dave!
We'd like to do
the mature thing...
and accept
partial responsibility
for all the trouble
we've caused.
Partial?
Yeah.
60-40, on us.
70-30?
As much as I hate the idea of
letting you three
out of my sight
for even a second...
Samantha and I have dinner
plans that I can't get out of.
So if anything happens,
we'll be at the villa.
Ooh, romantic.
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
What?
Hi.
Hi.
All right, you are
not to leave this room.
Do you understand, young man?
Yeah.
ALVIN: You guys don't
have to worry about us.
We'll be on our
best behavior tonight.
I promise. Whoa.
I know you will,
because I hired
a babysitter to keep
an eye on you.
What? Come on.
Oh, man.
We'll be home after the party.
(CHIPMUNKS GROANING)
Almost forgot this.
(GASPS)
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
Dave is going
to propose tonight.
What gave that away?
The romantic dinner
or the engagement ring?
Alvin, what are we
going to do?
Absolutely nothing.
What?
Alvin's right.
This hasn't been so bad.
Maybe we just...
do nothing.
"Nothing"?
Guys, "nothing" isn't a plan!
We can't do "nothing."
Sure we can.
Good luck proposing
without this.
(GASPS) Alvin!
When did you grab it?
I found it in his bag,
five minutes ago.
Does that mean we did it?
We did it.
Huzzah!
(HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING)
Turn down for what?
SIMON: Whoo-hoo! We did it!
We did it! Whoo-hoo!
Turn down for what? r
Come on, Miles,
join the party?
Miles?
SIMON: Miles, wait up!
Come on, man.
Let's celebrate! We did it!
Yeah.
You guys ruined
Dave's proposal
and now we
don't have to hang out.
Miles, hold on.
That doesn't mean
we can't be friends.
SIMON: Yeah, man.
I thought we had a great time
in New Orleans.
So did I. And then
I saw you celebrating
like you won the Super Bowl...
the second you found out
we weren't gonna be family.
So... see you.
Miles, wait! I can explain!
Guys, come on. Miles...
We've been through
a lot together.
Don't walk away now.
Yeah. Come on, Miles.
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Uh, Miles?
Miles? Miles!
Watch out!
Alvin, he can't hear us!
I'll knock him out of the way!
Slingshot on three!
Let's do this.
One...
two...
three!
(SCREAMING) Whoa!
(GASPS)
(GROANS)
Theo.
Theodore!
Theo.
Theodore.
Is he okay?
I don't know.
Theo! Come on! Get up! Please!
(WHEEZING)
(GASPS)
No! Theodore!
Come on!
Say something, say something!
(GASPS) I smell...
empanadas?
Theo!
Oh!
Theo, you're alive!
Is this Heaven?
No, it's South Beach.
(GIGGLES)
Theodore, you saved my life.
Like we always say,
you mess with one of us...
Don't make me say it, man,
it's so lame.
Miles, he got hit
by a car for you.
You mess with all of us.
All right!
Whoo-hoo! Oh, ouch!
Miles, we are so sorry.
We haven't been fair to you
from day one.
And the truth is...
you'd make a great brother.
SIMON AND THEODORE: Yeah!
I feel the same
about you guys.
So, I guess we're going to be
family after all.
Except for one tiny detail...
By stealing the ring,
we've effectively
ruined the proposal.
ALVIN: You're right.
We need to get that ring,
and get to that restaurant!
Let's do it. Come on.
(AGENT SUGGS LAUGHS)
Looks like Air Marshal Suggs
is gonna be checking into
the Shelborne Hotel.
Yes!
Time for a chip hunt!
BABYSITTER: I really
wanna go with you...
but I'm stuck babysitting.
Aw, man. The babysitter.
I hope when they get here,
they're not annoying.
Let's go.
Like, this last time...
I had a kid,
and he was, like...
"Oh, my gosh, can I have
yogurt?" And I was like...
"Oh, my gosh,
can you go to sleep?"
I don't think
she knows we're here.
I was like, "Ridiculous."
I don't think
she knows she's here.
This really sucks,
when you're so responsible,
and, like, everyone
around you is so not.
You know what I mean?
It's like, it's hard.
Oh, there you are.
Well, okay, I'm totally
texting you right now.
Hold on, let me
send you this picture.
He's, like, super cute.
I really like him.
Come on! Let's go.
Aw, I know.
What are you talking about?
I like that he's hairy.
Oh? Hairy, you say?
Yeah, scruffy's, like, cute.
It's like, "Hi, lam adorable,
but I'm also an animal."
You know? Yeah, I know.
Oh, yeah, right. Miles!
We're on our way.
Yeah, I know he's
a little short, but
I don't know, you know
that famous saying...
Theo! Come on! Let's go!
"Little things come in big
packages," or whatever.
Oh, man.
It's like that.
THEODORE: I think
she liked me.
(GRUNTS) I, like, could be
doing so many more
important things right now.
I could be, I don't know,
getting a pedicure?
I'm looking for
some chipmunks.
Guys, their reservation
was at 8:00.
So, we still might have time
to save the proposal.
Come on, let's go. Go!
AGENT SUGGS: Listen to me,
I know these chipmunks
are here.
This is a badge for the United
States government, okay?
ALVIN: Okay, guys,
here's the plan...
So, I need for you...
SIMON: Oh, no. It's Suggs!
He found us.
Theodore, get up!
Uh-oh!
Miles, you gotta get
the ring to Dave!
I'm not leaving you guys.
We'll distract him. Just go!
Run, run!
Theo! Hurry!
Get back here!
THEODORE: I'm going
as fast as I can!
SIMON: Think of donuts,
think of donuts!
THEODORE: Donuts? Whoo-hoo!
Go, Miles, go!
Hurry!
Run, run!
Hide over here!
Where?
I don't know!
Just think of something!
Come on. Where are you?
Where are you?
Come on.
Come on. Come on.
Hi...ya.
(GROWLS)
See ya!
Go, go, go!
Run, run!
Hurry, hurry! He's coming!
Hurry, Alvin. Hit the button!
Come on, Alvin! Hurry, hurry!
(SIGHS)
Whew!
Ha!
Here's Suggsy! (LAUGHS)
He's like the Terminator!
Yeah!
(BREATHES DEEPLY)
Oh, no.
This is ironic.
We're gonna be going up...
but I'm taking you boys down.
(SNICKERS)
Now, here's what's
gonna happen...
I'm gonna turn you over
to Homeland Security...
and they're gonna put you
in a zoo prison
for dangerous animals.
(GASPS) Oh, no.
And then, if you ever
get out of there...
I'm gonna pay someone to
have you stuffed.
Right.
And I'm gonna give you
as a gift to Anna,
who will hopefully
take me back.
Dude, I'm sorry,
but it's over.
You don't know that.
Theo, let's go.
I just think there's something
wrong with her phone
and she's not getting
my texts...
or the flowers,
or my candy grams.
And I, personally,
don't think it's uncommon...
for someone to move
five times a year
and change their number.
Okay? It's normal.
Oh, yeah. Totally normal.
Alvin!
What? What's going on?
And that's our cue to leave.
(GROANS)
(ALARM RINGING)
It has been a treat.
No... What are you doing?
Elevator power off.
(YELLS) No! No!
(GASPS)
ALVIN: Excuse me!
THEODORE: Pardon me!
Miles!
Hey. What happened to
Officer Dingleberry?
Let's just say
his elevator got stuck.
Has Dave proposed yet?
No, but they're on dessert.
It can't be long.
Excuse me. I'll be right back.
Oh, okay.
You remember what to do?
Yes, sir. Be no problem.
There's the box.
It's go time.
Excuse me...
young man, we have a strict
no pets policy
at this restaurant.
I'm going to have to ask you
to take your meerkats home.
Meerkats!
Esteban.
Please escort these things
out of the restaurant.
All right, all right.
Come on, guys.
We know when we're not wanted.
Evasive maneuvers! Nutmeg!
He shoots, he scores!
Nice, Alvin!
MILES: Go, Alvin, go!
Did you hear that? It sounded
like somebody yelled "Alvin."
Alley-OOP!
Whoo-hoo!
Pardon me!
I think you're imagining it.
Alvin!
ALVIN: I'm open!
Or not.
MAN: Oh!
Gotcha!
Whoo-hoo! Cold!
(SHOUTS)
Whoa!
Alvin?
Oh. Hi there, Dave.
Don't say it. Resist the urge.
We all know you wanna say it,
but hear me out.
Miles? What?
We can explain everything.
Well, I can't wait
to hear this.
Dave, we came to Miami
to stop you two
from getting engaged.
Oh, no.
I just blew the surprise.
But, and this is the part that
I'd like you to focus on...
when Theodore
got hit by a car...
Theodore got hit by a car?
I did.
He's fine. He was
saving Miles' life.
Wait, he what?
The point is,
we realized that...
we like the idea of
you two being together,
and we changed our minds.
Yep.
ALVIN: It might not be
the family in the photo
that comes with the frame...
but it's gonna be our family.
And we're proud of it.
Guys, that ring isn't mine.
So, you're not proposing?
I'm sorry, Samantha. I'm not.
Oh, thank God.
I mean,
that's not what I meant.
You know. I mean, not that
I couldn't see it
happening someday.
I mean, uh... Not that
I'm expecting it to happen.
But I mean,
if it did happen...
I'm spiraling, aren't I?
A little.
What I mean is...
I would love it if we could
just take our time because...
I really want it to work.
Me, too.
ALVIN: I'm very
confused right now.
You brought this ring to Miami
and you said you had to
come to dinner, so...
I was holding it for Barry.
My sound engineer.
He's proposing to
his girlfriend, Alice,
at the restaurant right now...
with an empty ring box.
Oh, my God.
Will you marry me?
It's not empty.
A breath mint?
(SPANISH MUSIC PLAYING)
Miss Grey, over here.
When are you
going back on tour?
MAN: The greenroom is
right this way, Mr. Seville.
The only reason
we're not headed
back to LA right now
is because...
I have to be here.
As soon as the show is over,
we're all going home.
I don't think I've ever been
more disappointed
in you guys
than I am right now.
If Dave didn't wanna
get rid of us before,
he definitely does now.
All because we only cared
about if we were happy.
Maybe it's a chipmunk thing,
like hoarding, you know?
Maybe we're
emotional hoarders?
Actually, chipmunks are
traditionally
very caring creatures.
Oh, nuts.
Well, that means it's us.
I'd do anything to fix this.
Wait. Maybe we can fix it.
By doing the one thing
we do best!
Cause mischief on
land, sea and air?
Eat all of Dave's food?
No! Music!
When words aren't enough,
we sing!
So let's give Dave
one last song
to show him
how we really feel about him.
Miles, start working on
that little country riff
you were doing in Texas.
Where are you going?
There's so much to do.
I need to talk to Wardrobe,
we need to...
If we are gonna
bring down the house,
we're gonna need some backup.
Once upon a time
I was fallin' in love
Oh, boy.
Now it's only
fallin' apart
Oh, okay.
Nothin' I can say
A total
eclipse of the heart 4'
Ooh!
(SCREAMS)
Um, well...
You're going to Hollywood!
(SHRIEKS)
Alvin!
I'm going to Hollywood!
I'm going to Hollywood!
Sorry, girls, I've always
wanted to say that.
What are you doing here?
Yeah.
We're kind of in
the middle of auditions.
I need your help.
We really screwed up with Dave
and we gotta fix it.
Because it's for Dave,
we're in.
ANNOUNCER: Please
give a warm welcome...
for Miss Ashley Grey!
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
Thank you, guys-
Now, I have a very special
surprise for you...
which was a surprise to me
as well until just now.
Everybody, welcome
The Chipmunks!
(CHEERING)
Thanks, Ashley.
Thanks.
Thank you.
ALVIN: Um...
Before we perform,
my brothers and I have
a few things to set straight.
Earlier this evening...
we accidentally ruined
a very special evening...
for a very special woman
and we'd like to
make it up to her.
Yeah.
Alice?
Barry has something
he'd like to ask you.
Again.
Will you marry me this time?
Yes.
ALL: Aw.
Yes.
(APPLAUDING)
Thanks, Chipmunks.
And we just had one more
quick thing to say.
Dave...
We're really sorry.
We're sorry.
So we wrote this
last song for you.
(GUITAR PLAYING)
Oh you shine bright
Brighter than all the stars
Brighter than fireworks
So I give you all my love
And you're perfection
even in your mistakes
Give affection even
when your heart aches
When I'm away,
you're who I'm thinking of
Because
You are my home, home, home
Wherever I may roam
Whoo!
Wow!
You are the place where
I can rest my weary bones
You are my home, home, home
You are my home,
home, home
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
(LAUGHS)
Please welcome The Chipettes!
You're a diamond
brightening my cloudy skies
Wow.
Sparkling all through
the night
Light me up like fireflies
See you shinin'
even in the darkness
Stand beside me
when I don't deserve it
That's why I say
I give you all my love
Because
You are my home,
home, home
Whoo!
Wherever I may roam
You are the place where
I can rest my weary bones
You are my home, home, home
You're my number one
there's no doubt
And we stick together
throughout
Like Boy Scouts, we about
All for one till lights out
So, Dave, where u at?
Wave your hands front to back
Everybody take a look around
At my dad out in the crowd!
ALVIN: I love you, Dave!
(VOCALIZING)
You are my home,
home, home
(CHEERING LOUDLY)
Thank you.
Nailed it.
Thank you!
Thank you, my people-
(ALL PANTING)
We still got it.
Yeah! Whoo!
Girls, thank you.
We owe you one.
You owe us way more than one,
but, you're welcome.
Guys, we have to
get back to auditions.
Ryan's been
texting me like crazy.
Come on, girls. Let's roll.
Bye, Theodore-able. (GIGGLES)
Miles, that was amazing!
Dave, we're so sorry
we came to Miami
without telling you.
We just didn't wanna lose you.
Lose me?
Why would you guys ever think
you were gonna lose me?
Because you said
you're starting
a new chapter in your life.
We thought you might
bail on us.
Technically,
we're not even a family.
We're just three chipmunks
who live with you.
Is that what you guys think?
I mean, I know I haven't
really been around much
lately, and...
things are changing for us,
but I'd never
bail on you guys.
Because we are a family.
You're stuck with me
whether you like it or not.
And I was probably
a little over-the-top
on the whole
"no music" thing, okay?
You guys can perform.
All right!
But locally. Okay?
Sure!
And I promise to be a better
dad from here on out.
What are you
talking about, Dave?
You're the best dad
we could ever have.
What do you say to
a little family dinner
when we get home?
You know, so we know where
our kids are the entire time
we're together?
That sounds perfect.
Whoo-hoo! We rocked it!
Simon, did you see me?
I was on fire! Oh.
I can't believe
I'm saying this,
but I had fun getting
in trouble with you guys.
The trip might be over,
but as long as
Alvin is around,
we'll always get into trouble.
Thanks,SH
Not a compliment.
Oh, my God,
you guys were awesome.
Hey, Miles, right?
WOW, you played great!
Thanks! Your cool song...
I mean... I love when...
Music with your mouth...
Oh, brother.
Uh...
You're great.
Thank you.
Phew! She bought it.
Anyways, I have this party
I'm supposed to go to
in L.A. Saturday night...
if, um, maybe you'd wanna...
Definitely, yeah.
I'd, definitely
would like to...
Yes. Definitely.
Oh.
Okay. Well then
I'll definitely,
definitely see you there.
Okay.
Bye.
Bye.
ALVIN: (CHUCKLES)
Smooth, Miles.
Real smooth.
Bye.
All right!
Hey, ready?
Yeah.
Bye, guys.
Come on, guys. Let's go home.
Should we remind him we're
on the No-Fly List?
Definitely not.
THEODORE: Um,
this doesn't look like home.
It's not.
We have one more
important thing
to do before we go home.
Oh, Dave, we've been
driving for three days!
Can't it wait?
Unfortunately not, boys.
The courthouse
is closed tomorrow.
I'm sorry, the what house?
Are we going to jail?
We didn't mean to cause an
emergency landing, Dave!
It was freezing in cargo!
Does this look like a face
that will survive prison?
Come on.
Dave Seville?
Yep, that's me.
By signing this...
you not only agree
to take care of,
but to provide for the health,
welfare and
educational needs...
of Alvin, Simon and Theodore.
I do.
Alvin, Simon and Theodore,
do you agree to this adoption?
Adoption?
(GASPS) That's why we're here?
You're adopting us?
You guys were right.
Even though you consider me
to be your dad, and...
I love you like my own sons,
it's never been official.
So I figured...
let's make it official.
Chipmunks?
Yes?
I still need you to say
something like "I agree."
Just to make it legal.
Oh, yeah! I agree!
Yeah. Me, too!
1,000%!
And that's not even
a real number.
(LAUGHS)
Does this mean we're Sevilles?
On this day...
David Seville has
officially adopted
Alvin, Simon and Theodore
to be his children.
You three now have
all the legal rights
of any natural child.
Or, chipmunk.
I hereby sign this order
confirming this adoption.
Congratulations.
Thank you.
Whoo-hoo!
Yay!
This is amazing! Yes!
Guys, guys... Just...
Up high, Judge. Give me some.
Whoo-hoo! I'm so happy!
Awesome!
Dave!
Whoa!
Sweet!
Yes! We're a family!
We have a dad. Legally.
Okay.
Okay, all right. Alvin, okay.
What an amazing day!
(ALL LAUGHING)
They're excited.
Yes!
Hey, official and legal Dad?
Yes, official and legal son?
Thanks for being the best
official and legal dad, Dad.
Well, you three are the best
official and legal sons
an official and legal father
could ask for.
Aw. That's sweet
of you to say, Dad.
Yeah.
But seriously, guys, this is
the happiest day of my life.
Literally nothing
could ruin it for me.
(SQUIRRELS SQUEAKING)
Oh, boy.
(GASPS) Alvin.
Totally forgot about this.
Alvin!
CHIPMUNKS: This hit
That ice cold
Michelle Pfeiffer
That white gold
This one for
them good girls
(AGENT SUGGS GROANS)
Them good girls
Straight masterpiece
I Stylin', wilin'
Livin' it up in the city
Got Chucks on
with Saint Laurent
Which way is the pool?
Gotta kiss myself,
I'm so pretty
I'm too hot
4' Oh, yeah!
Thank you.
I'm too hot
Oh, yeah!
Make a dragon
wanna retire, man
I'm too hot
Oh, yeah!
Say my name
you know who I am
I'm too hot
4' Oh, yeah!
Got some bad news, muchacho.
The chairs are for
hotel guests only. Beat it.
Okay.
I got some bad news
for you, too, muchacho.
I'm not moving.
I was just stuck
in your elevator of death
for hours and
I'm probably out of a job...
so I'm gonna sit in this chair
by this pool,
and I'm gonna relax.
And if you got
a problem with it,
you can carry me out. (LAUGHS)
You can carry me out!
Carry me out! Go for it!
Yes, sir.
Go for it!
Oh
Don't believe
me just watch
That's him. That's the guy.
Oh, come on! Come on.
What are you gonna do,
carry me out? Really?
Okay, you are gonna
carry me out. Okay!
Okay, this is fine!
I've been looking
to relax all day!
I'm like Cleopatra!
Floating away!
I'm gonna chillax!
Hey, hey, hey, Oh!
Stop
Wait a minute
Fill my cup
Put some water in it
Take a sip, sign a check
Julio, Get the stretch!
Ride to Harlem, Hollywood,
Jackson, Mississippi
If we show up
We gon' show out
Smoother than
a fresh jar of Skippy
I'm too hot!
Oh, yeah!
Call the police
and the fireman
I'm too hot
4' Oh, yeah!
Make a dragon
wanna retire, man
I'm too hot!
Oh, yeah!
Say my name
you know who I am
I'm too hot
Oh, yeah!
And my band 'bout that money
Break it down
Girls hit your hallelujah
Whoo
Girls hit your hallelujah
Whoo
'Cause Uptown Funk
gon' give it to ya
Saturday night
and we in the spot
Don't believe me just watch
Come on
Whoo!
Uh, don't believe me
just watch
Yeah, come on!
Don't believe me just watch
5 Hey, hey, hey, Oh!
(CHORUS SCATTING)
Before we leave
Let me tell y'all
a little something
Uptown Funk it up
I said Uptown Funk it up
Uptown Funk it up
Come on, dance
Jump on it
If you can dance,
then flaunt it
If you freaky, then own it
Don't brag about it
Come show me
Come on, dance
Jump on it
If you can dance,
then flaunt it
Saturday night
and we in the spot
Don't believe me just watch
Come on
Whoo!
Uh, don't believe me
just watch
Yeah, come on!
Uptown Funk it up
Say what?
Uptown Funk it up
Uptown Funk it up a'
All we need is love
Wanna shout it from
the rooftops
All we need is love
I feel the love
under the stars
On the rooftop tonight
Here we come together as one
Connected by
our beating hearts
All around the world
All we need is love
I'm calling out to you
All we need is love
A revolution of love
All we need is love
Here we go, go, go
All we need is love
Wanna shout it
from the rooftops
All we need is love
Green lights all of the way
on the freeway of love
We got it all
if we got each other
And everything
will be all right
All around the world
All we need is love
I'm calling out to you
All we need is love
A revolution of love
All we need is love
Here we go, go, go
All we need is love
Wanna shout it
from the rooftops
All we need is love
We're on a one way ticket
to paradise
We're kicking down the doors
and coming alive
All we need is love
From the ground up
Let's start
a revolution of love
All we need is love
All we need is love
All we need is love
All we need is love
All we need is love
Wanna shout it
from the rooftops
All we need is love
We're on a one way ticket
to paradise
We're kicking down the doors
and coming alive
r All we need is love
From the ground up
Let's start
a revolution of love a