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Any Questions for Ben? (2012)
Hey, Tom, how we doing?
OK, one, two, three. Who's first up out of the... Who's coming out? You are. Perfect. Listen to the music. Remember, energy. There's gonna be snow, smoke. Some fire - that's bad. Report that. Own This Club You were amazing! Go out there. Vingle. Drink responsibly. Remember, it's 'low carb', not 'low carbon'. - They're loving it! - Oh, yeah? - Loving it! - Great! The slender bottle, the whole 'it's so hot it's cool' thing. - 'So cool it's hot'! - Yeah! Grab a drink! They won't be happy until that's empty. Freefallin' Good job. Seriously. Great job. Oh, whoa, whoa. Tom, Tom, Tom. - Give one to your girlfriend. - Thanks. And get a girlfriend! - We did well. - Yeah. It went OK. In two years time, this brand could be anywhere. You might be right. I really feel like we're building something. Hey, listen. I should probably tell you, I'm... I'm actually leaving. - Really? - Yeah. I just... The time's right. That's all. What, after six months? Thanks, Ben, for six months of loyal service. Well, seven, actually. Thank you, thank you. And now he's off to casual sportswear. What? Oh, come on! Like I said in my reference, if anyone can take a clapped-out product from yesteryear and sell it to 20-something metrosexuals, it's this guy. - Thanks. - Token of our appreciation. Oh, I didn't get you anything. - Katey? - Well, goodbye. - Oh... goodbye. - And happy birthday. Thank you. How'd you know it was my birthday? A little Google alert told me. How'd you know I wanted a heart-rate monitor? - I rang Andy. - How do you know Andy? Your mum gave me his number. Mmm... Uh... Katey, Katey, Katey. I've, uh... - I kinda met someone. - You meet girls all the time. I think this one's serious. - Hey. - Just in case you forgot me. Oh, please. As if I could forget you... - Fleur. - No, I hadn't finished. I was just gonna... - Should we grab a table? - Yep. - So, what's hot? - Have you done Peru? Gracias. Oh, wow. This one's the same as yours, but with a 10-megapixel camera. - Do you take a lot of photos? - No. No. But 10? - Just arrived today. - Cool. Only came out in the US, like, yesterday. - OK? - Thank you. - She's got a boyfriend. - Understood. - Have a good one. - Thanks. Surprise! Happy birthday! - Happy birthday, Ben. - Hey! Steph! I... didn't think you'd be here. We weren't technically going out, so I wasn't actually dumped. - Oh, good. - I'm still angry. One sec. Put a pin in that. I wanna hear the end. - Hey! - Mwah! Happy birthday! - He is gonna get changed, right? - Yeah. I didn't get to train this morning. I've got this new program. I wanna stick to my timing intervals... Bzzz. - Too long? - Little bit. - Darling. - Just some picture frames. You just need to put some little photos in. Or I could just date her. You know what Sam started doing at 27? Talking about himself in the third person? This is the year you need to go from here to here. - Legally? - We need to talk. - And we will. - We will talk. Now, where are we off to? What about Japan? We've got to do Japan. - Snowboarding. - OK! Are you planning another holiday? He just finished up work today! They owed you short-service leave or? Cool place. OK, guys! Can I get your attention, please? - Has everyone got a Red Minsk? Yes! Does it actually come from Russia? New Zealand. Cheaper potatoes, apparently. To Ben! - Are you serious? - Proud of myself this morning. Mate, it's Saturday morning. We just had a party. Yeah, I know. I was feeling flat. But a decent hill climb, it's amazing how good I feel. The endorphins are pumping right through my body. - It's... - Hi. And now I feel flat again. Don't, mate. Hey, don't do that. - That's my T-shirt. - Mate. Your life. How do you keep doing that? - Stop that, alright? I envy you. - No, you don't. - I do! - Really? Yes. - Which bit? - Which bit? God, where do I start? All... the whole... thing. I mean... what you've got with Em. You know? That stuff, mate. It... And a career. Commercial litigation lawyer. Come on. Your triathlons. Triathlons! That's something! You know? What am I doing? Dating models, going to openings, earning twice as much as me. I don't think it's twice, but that's what people think I do. No, that's what you do, Ben. I live with you. That's really what you do. But that stuff doesn't mean anything, Nick. Not like... And Em... You know? You know... Nick, seriously, you've got it together, mate. I mean it, you have got it sorted. - Really? - You're a cool guy. - Thanks, mate. - Alright. - I'll get dressed. - Great. Um... you? - I've got plans. - You do? - Yeah. - She's... - Good luck with that. - Thank you. Who's having the porridge with honey and biodynamic yoghurt with a side of... That's me, thank you. And omelette with mushroom ragout... - Me. ... with a side of sourdough toast - Me. ... and pork and fennel sausage? Yeah, me. Thanks. OK, well, dig in. Sorry. Just this little audition thing. No, it sounds exciting. What is it? Uh... I probably won't get it. - Acting? - Presenting. Well, of course. I mean, made for it. - You think? - Yeah, absolutely. Fingers crossed. Which bit did you actually do? Dad, we basically changed everything - - What about the vodka? - No. That part is the same. But we came up with those hats. - So there is a fair bit in it? - Oh, yeah. - Honey, proud of this one. - Happy birthday, darling. - Oh, thanks, Mum. - Happy birthday. Ooh, 27, hey, sweetheart? You know what I was doing at your age? Uh... the lambada? - Listening to Wham!? - That's not only funny, that's true. - Dating a girl with shoulder pads? - That's enough. It was my first year as assistant manager, first company car. - And it still looks great. - Hey, I should've kept it. Hey, thanks, Mum! I thought it might be interesting to read before you go. Did you know that Hemingway had written about it? - No! Wow! - It's a good read too. Um... Here's the thing - we're not actually doing Kilimanjaro. Had to delay the trip, but, uh... Still definitely going, just... matter of timing... Don't, Mum. What? - I'm gonna get those mushrooms. - We're going, definitely. If an alcoholic can climb it, it should be a walk in the park. Apparently, you do not go in the rainy season. That makes sense. - Yeah. - We're still doing a trek. Sort of. - Where? - Bali. - Bali, eh? Doing Uluwatu. Mum. That's me at 27. Oh-ho-ho! Wow! Mum did have shoulder pads. She wore them well. And Stephanie? How's Stephanie? Um... Well, Steph and I are sort of, uh... ...in transition. - What's that mean? - I think our son's moved on. Oh. That reminds me. I've got a new job. Not too far out of town, which is nice. Not a big change. Basically, doing what I was doing before. And what is that? One of the blokes at work was asking. I gotta say, I struggled a bit. - I'm a strategic brand manager. - I told him that. But what's the bit that you actually do? I strategise brand positioning, try and put it in the right market slice... - I'll write it down. - Could you? And email it to me. OK. You forgot your presents, sweetheart. Oh, God! Thanks, Mum. Amazing! And I'm gonna... read 'em. Thank you. - And your mail. - Nothing much in there. Something from the old school. Check it out. - OK. - Drive carefully. 'The opportunity to hear from those with direct experience in a range of fields... ' Anyway, you know what this stuff is. - Let's make a move. - No, keep going. - Come on! - We'll be late. - I wanna hear you read it. - Why? - It sounds great. - Do we even... have time? - Oh, alright. If you want. - Yes. 'The carcers night remains a highlight of the school calendar... ' Wasn't when I was there. '... and each year we ask a number of former students who have distinguished themselves... ' Oh, please. 'This year the school's governing board would like to officially extend an invitation to Benjamin Robcrt... blah, blah... ' So it goes. - Wow, Ben, that's a real honour. - No. When they use your middle name, it's an honour. Or a summons. - Hey! - Beautiful woman. Ah, big fella. I was gonna stick it on your head. - Hey, mate, you want a? - Yes. Love one. You guys right? You finish those. Guess who got invited to our school's careers night. Guess who else got invited. - Who? - Alex. Get out of here! Alex? - She's coming back for it. - She's coming back?! - It's been like two years... - Who? Alex. Alexandra Hennessy. You remember Alex. From school. - She went to uni with us. - Yes. OK. Yeah, right. OK, yeah, yeah. She was, um... She was nice. - Wow! - Sorry. Why 'wow'? What do you mean? OK, Alex is coming back. What's with the 'wow'? I think she's amazing. - She's a lawyer. You're a lawyer. - A human rights lawyer. Oh, hold on. I don't think she actually works on human rights. Yeah, she does. She actually works on human rights. - And humanitarian assistance. - With the United Nations. - Really? - Yes. Her email is @un. org. - Wow. - Not you too. - Come on. - It's cool, huh? Hoy, here he is. - Andy, Simon. - Love your work. Thank you. Feel like a pensioner. What do you guys think of the new look? - Cool. - Great. Sam reckons the refurbishments alone, half a million bucks. - Great. - OK. Where have your wows gone? Half a million on the fit-out. Wow. Either 'wow' properly or don't do it at all. Hey! Fleur. Everyone, Fleur. Sorry I'm late, everyone. Ah... winner. I'm not afraid to say it. - Why? Oh, my God. No, no, no. You have to choose. If I had to choose. - Weather presenting. - Ooh. But I'd look at the lotto draw and wonder about it every time. - Wow. - I get it. - Good question. - I guess that's it, then. - I've got another one. - No, you don't. - I've got a beauty. - Great! If you were on a desert island, and you could only take one accessory, would it be handbag or shoes? So, should we catch up for lunch? Um... yeah. Yeah. Tomorrow? I'm actually starting a new job tomorrow. - Oh. Later in the week. - Yeah. Thursday? Friday? - Look, I don't know... - You know what, surprise me. OK. I love surprises. OK. Are You Still Having Fun? You're gonna be impressed. This is HQ. Morning, all. Ben's first day on the job today. Make him welcome. - Hi. - Morning. Go easy on him too. Sorry I didn't wear a tie. No, no, don't be silly. That's what you're here for. Careful, I might do the same myself. This is Lucy, my executive assistant. - Hi. Lovely to meet you. - Nice to meet you. Thank you. It's nice to be here. Anyway. Somehow manages to get me through the day. Yeah, she seems very, very nice. - She's got a boyfriend. - Gotcha. Pretty much all the executive offices are on this floor. Here's one. Ben who? - First day for Ben today, Ken. - Right. You remember Ken from the interview? Yes. Great to see you again, Ken. Ken has been handling our marketing here for yonks. But make no mistake, he's as keen as mustard for some fresh takes, arcn't you, Ken? Yep. L"I give 'em a listen. Yep. Well, Ken's busy, so we'll come back... We'll continue this later. Are you familiar with the brand 'Simpson'? - The washing machines? - No. Tennis wear. Oh. Yes! Oh, of course. Used to sponsor the Davis Cup. Newcombe, Roche. Glory days. Rod Laver. Look at those pleats. Anyway, it's one of our oldest labels, fallen completely from sight. Had a very loyal clientele in its days. - We feel it's time to, you know... - Yeah, get rid of it. - No. No. Restore it. Relaunch it. - Right! - Get it up and running again. - Excellent! Good! Sorry, I was worried you'd lost faith. No, no. Actually, we've had an idea for the relaunch. We're thinking... women. Uh-huh. What about them? We get them to buy Simpson. You want women to buy...? How? Well, that's you. That's why we've got you. - Oh... - That's the mission! ...right! Excellent. # Well, you know when you've been defeated # You don't care and you thank no-one # Feeling low you will always need it # And are you having fun... # Hey! What? I think we might need some time apart. After two days? Right. I'm not necessarily saying a long time apart. I thought we were clicking. We were, we are. It's just... Shit, I don't know. My head hasn't been straight at the moment. I just got a new job... - Are you a jerk? - What? No. Last night she said you were a bit of a jerk. - I wasn't. - You sounded like a jerk. What is this, tribal council? I was tired. - That's no excuse. - Exactly. I'm sorry, do you mind? Thanks very much. Look, Fleur, I'm sorry. I really am. I... Here's the truth - I just got out of a long relationship and I guess I still haven't quite come to terms with it... here. Such bullshit. - Absolutely. - Pure bullshit. - Thanks, Sam. - Yeah. - Busy today. - Killing it. - Want another coffee? - Nah. I really can't. I gotta knuckle down. But thanks. - Cheers, Mick. - Leave you to it, hey? Is this for the new job? No. God, no. That would've taken a paragraph. I've gotta give a speech at the old school tomorrow night. Oh, yeah. What are they paying you? - No, you don't get paid. - Come on, what are they paying? - Sam, you don't get paid. - Tell them to fuck off! OK, just, shh-shh. Mm-hmm. No, it's like, uh... it's an honour to even be asked. You know, it's a big thing. Oh, yeah. No, I get it. Yeah, an honour. Well done. What's it about? Uh... career, success after school. That sort of thing. What's the secret to life? Mmm. Vany. You know what I would tell these kids? Ah, it's... What? About the essence. The essence? It doesn't matter what you do. 'Cause at the end of the day, the only thing that counts in life, the only thing that truly means anything, is that you win. You beat the other guy. You take the challenge head-on and you crush him. Can I use that? - It's yours. - Great. And it's the truth. Ow. Ben! Hey... g'day, mate! - Jim. - Jim! Good to see you. Great to see you. I didn't know you were doing it. I saw your name... - What an honour. - Yeah. - And, hey, congratulations. - Oh, thanks. - Olympian. - In archery. Still, just to make it there. Yeah, I suppose, and win a medal. Yeah... bronze. I mean, great! Fantastic! Well done. What about you? Did you keep up cricket after school? - Yeah, a bit. I had to let it go. - Oh, that's disappointing. - Not really... - You were such a good cricketer. Well... yeah, thanks, but I did other things. Oh. That's good. Yeah, great. OK, mate, well, I better probably keep going. But I'll see you afterwards. - Ben. - Sir. - No need to call me 'sir' anymore. - Can't stop. - Thank you so much for coming. - Vy pleasure. - Full house tonight. - Really? Yeah. Big thing now, these nights. Had to tell the Year 10s they couldn't come. - Kept up your cricket? - No. Ah, that's disappointing. Few years back... Hey, it's nice to see you. Hi! So nice to see you. An honoured guest, I see. - You too. - I think I got the wild card. Ooh, I'm so nervous. Honcstly, I don't know how I ended up in Africa. Especially when I think back to school and all I wanted to be was a professional netballer or a member of the Spice Girls. In the early days with the UN, you get rotated quite often. So this is my third country... The thing about Northern Africa is there's this incredible diversity... ...incredibly rich oil economies through to totally bankrupt nations. ...they're also far less likely to be caught up in extremism... ...agencies and the NGOs like the UNHCR, USAID... Sorry, do I sound like I've just swallowed a dictionary? Anyway, we're all trying to help. I'm sorry, should I... should I stop or... No, no, no. Don't. That child is currently in school and she drew me a picture of herself with the word 'shukran' which is Arabic for thank you. So... so, thank you. Thank you, Alex. Thank you so much. What a journey. Some of the Year 11 s are studying third-world development and microfinance, so they'll be doubly... I can see some nods. Any questions for Alex? Wow! We're not going to be able to take everyone. Just five or six. I really want to move on to Ben. Yes. Uh, yeah, and so after all the repackaging and the relaunching, I suppose the real satisfaction comes at the end when you look up and you see that billboard and it's there for all to see and you say to yourself... I think that's the moment you say... I've rebranded. No, maybe even more than that - I've... I've recreated. And is this for the vodka or the socks? The cushion socks? - No, I mean in general. - Sorry, in general. Of... yeah, when you see the billboard and, or... ...or whatever. Yeah. I just mean that's when it feels real for me. The... Yeah, just when 10,000 people will drive past it and... ycah. Are you finished? - Sorry, am I.? - You're finished? - Yes. - OK. Well... well done. - Oh. OK. - Thank you. Very, very interesting. Some people are doing a marketing module so that will be right on target. I don't quite... no, no. Let's dive straight into questions. That's the way to drill down things. Any questions? OK. Rowan. Yes? I've got a question for Alex. No, I meant any... I mean any questions for Ben. We'll open up to the panel in a moment. I just want to stay with Ben for the moment. Any questions for Ben? You spoke too well. OK, come on, come on, I know you... Any questions? Now's the time. Actually I've got a question about billboards. Do they go up in one sheet or in separate panels? - Hi. - Hi. I... I was thinking maybe we grab a drink. Um... I would love to. OK, great. Um... are you up for one? I better not. No, I've got a big meeting in the morning. This project I'm trying to put to bed. Ah, you're repositioning a brand? - Uh, yeah. - Wow! - So I... - Can't tempt you for one? - Look, not tonight. No. - OK. Sorry. But you know what, let's catch up while you're in town. - Actually I would love that. - Great. I'm around these days too. Yeah, that's good to know, Jim. Great. Um... - OK, let's do that. - Good to see you. I'll tell Briany. Anyway, goodbye. - Don't be down about that. - Oh, no. I'm fine. They were absorbing it. You really had to listen. They'll be talking about it in the playground tomorrow. I got the order wrong. I should have put you on after archery. - I mean, Alex spoke so well. - Yeah. We're saving the world and then we're rebranding vodka. Absolutely fabulous. Sold well? - Yeah. - That's the main thing. You should have mentioned that. I'll pop it in the newsletter. - It's fine. - Wasn't Jim terrific? # Why drink the water from my hand? # Contagious as you think I am # Don't scream about Don't think aloud # Turn your head now baby Just spit me out # Don't worry about Don't speak of doubt # Turn your head now baby Just spit me out. # I'm buzzed. I'll be honest with you. When you called it 'barbecue wear', it put me back on my heels a little. I didn't mean to be rude. That's how the young demo might see it. And we need to hear that. But then you started talking about hip heritage, icon brands, about making connections. Well, I'm up on my toes. Ken will be too. - Great. - So I say we've got our ideas. You've got yours. Bring 'em on. Alright. Well, I can't get to it right away. Now... I've got a ton of questions for ya. - Jim? - Yeah. Jim the Archer? Did he go to the Olympics? Yes, I just said that. Jim won a medal at the Olympics? - Yeah. He did. - Wow! - The wows are back, are they? - How did he go? Fine. He's an Olympian. What does he have to do? - Good on Jim. - You don't even know him. - Sounds like a good guy. - I guess he's fine. And you? How did you go? Uh... yeah. Fine. - Charmed them, no doubt. - Uh, yeah. And what about Alex? I've been too afraid to ring her. - Good. She went well. - Really? - Kids loved her. - Really?! I just said they loved her. What do you want me to say? - Oh, thanks, mate. - Pleasure. - Hey, Andy. - Yeah? - Could I ask you something? - Yeah, sure. - Do you ever get the feeling... - This is a great ad. Watch this. Uh... you know what, I'll ask afterwards. Sure. - I don't know... - This is the bit. Oh, it's funny! That was the last we ever saw of him. He lives now... only in my memories. Oh! Loved the way that movie ends. It's a great ending, isn't it? You get this feeling that he's still searching for something. - Yeah. Petrol. - I mean, spiritually. - He's after a sense of meaning. - No, petrol and food for his dog. Andy, we're done. Should we go to the bar? Yeah, right. Em, you don't have Alex's number, do you? Yeah, sure. We were meant to get together. It might be nice to catch up. Oh, she's gone. She went to Canberra this morning, then she's flying out. Oh. Bummer. OK. I've got her email address if you want. - Yeah, that would be great. - She'd love to hear from you. - Well... - I'll send it to you. - Excellent. - Doing it now. # It's the time of the season # When love runs high # And this time, give it to me easy # And let me try with pleasured hands # To take you in the sun to promised lands # To show you everyone # It's the time of the season for loving. # - Oh, my God! - Behold. - You had a big TV. - Not this big. Bring on summer sports. Are you gonna make it later? Yeah. What morons have a work Christmas party on Christmas Eve? Just don't show. I'll make an appearance and sneak out the back. Oh, the spirit of Christmas. Have you considered the possibility you might enjoy it? Everyone say, 'Smart casual! ' Smart casual! This is killing me! Now... got a little surprise for you. - I know what you're all thinking. - I doubt that. This is not the venue for tonight's party. The venue is actually right behind you. Not a boat, not a boat, not a boat... Shit. That's right, folks. That barbecue boat is ours for the next four hours. Oh, fuck! It's gonna be great fun. Let's go. Cheers, all. How's everyone down here? Oh, OK. Been looking all over for you. Now you've found me. Oh, she's a beautiful old city, isn't she? Yeah, she is. - Quite the dame. - Yep. Ken's firmed up his ideas. - Brand ambassadors. - Oh, yeah? Spoken with a few player agents. The thing with agents... They're mentioning big names. - They're talking Venus Williams. - They'll do that. I'd be happy with Serena. Listen, you've gotta be careful with these promises. What are we doing? We're talking shop. Guilty. - OK. - Christmas Eve. Soak it up. Look, it's me! Let's have a photo with Santa. What has been going on below decks? Alright, listen up, everybody. You're probably wondering why we've pulled in here. - Somali pirates? - What's that, Ben? I'm just wondering. Well, you might. Time for surprise number two. Oh, this isn't good. Over that hill is the Sidney Vyer Music Bowl. - Uh-oh. - Home to Carols by Candlelight. Please, no. Where wc as a sponsor have a reserved row for the entire concert! - You with me? - Yeah! This way, my friends. Merry Christmas, everybody. If you could see what I can see from where I am, what a sight! Umpire Aleem Dar says over. This really is a wonderful atmosphere... Just realised we haven't checked the box. Junk, junk... Looks like a letter for you. Do we need a handyman? Uh... no, no. Another Thai restaurant. # So tell me family now what do you think? # Watch it all go down the great big sink # Watch how the scum it rises to the top # Don't you wonder when it's all gonna stop? # Sometimes I wonder how we do sleep # Serving the dodgy companies we keep # All kicking and scrounging for the very first place... # - Smells good. - Hey, Benny boy. It's 'cause it is good. Hey, what are you doing here? Nothing. I was up, I thought I'd get an early start. - What's up? - Nothing. I felt like a coffee. - Come on. - Come on, Sam, I'm fine. Benny, I know that look. What's up? So... it's that bloody school thing I had to talk at. Did you tell them what I told you? About crushing your opposition? Uh, sort of. Not really. There were five of us, right. We each did our thing and at the end of the Q&A part, I didn't get asked a single question. Not one? Not one? And it wasn't even just the questions there. As I was describing what I did, I don't know, I guess it sounded kinda... flaky. Flaky? Did you tell them what you get paid? The highest paid 27-year-old in town. Shove that down your pimply fuckin' faces. Not really appropriate. You know what it is? Envy. You've got the best life of anyone I know. - It's not that good. - It's the best. It's OK. I should have charged. Don't get fooled by do-gooders. Every kid there would take what you've got in a flash. Now I look like a commercial litigation lawyer. You are a commcrcial litigation lawyer. - My point, Andy. - Don't worry about it. At Bergine, we see a natural link between international tennis and the wristwatch. Can a watch have an ambassador? Katerina Sinova. My God! I would like to take this opportunity to thank you all for your support. Icon brands. We're talking global feel. Right, but you don't say any of that. Leave that to me. And it's just for Australasia or its limited territory. Right... do I say that? I'll take care of all of that. Just play the mogul, turn on the charm. We're certainly looking forward to seeing your daughter out on court. Da. We'll all be cheering her on. - You're not going to? - No. - I think he gets the idea. - Sure. Of course, the Americans would say we'd be rootin' for her. OK, we might... we've been vcry selfish with your time. Thank you for your time. - Absolute delight. - Enjoy the evening. - All the best for the tournament. - Can't wait to see you in action. Good luck with the tournament. - All the best to you all. Thank you. - Thanks. See you. Oh, man! That Russian sense of humour! - What did she have to say? - Not much. Just touched on sponsorships, stuff like that. - Oh... my... God. - What? She's coming. - Shit, is her dad with her? - No. She's coming. She's here. - Ahem. - That was great. - Hello again. - Hi. - Hi, I'm Katerina. - Yes, you are. - This is Nick. - I am. - This is Andy. - Hi, Andy. Katerina. Sorry, I was getting a little tired talking to agents. Oh, who could blame you? I was thinking of maybe getting out of here. - Sure. - Vaybe go have a drink? Sounds good to me. - And your friends? - They're fine. - Oh, no... - No, we're fine. - Are we? - We're good. Just you and I, then. Terrific. Well, where shall we go? Wow! This place is incredible. Another family lives here? Just me. If we split up, we should meet back here. Should we order food? No, I don't think so. Drink, perhaps? I'm already a little tipsy. OK... Technically what base am I on at the moment? You have had sex before? No, I have a couple of times. Never with a top-ten tennis player. Well, who believes those WTA rankings? Shall we take this to the bedroom? - No? - No. Yeah. This probably folds out anyway. Loosen up. You seem nervous. - You are funny. - Thanks very much. - Um... - It's beautiful. - Yes, it is very pretty. Katerina? - Yeah? Should we maybe close the curtains? You don't like looking at my body? Yes, I do. Just not on YouTube. Yeah... see, I don't think we've solved it, have we? Oh! Hi, you wanted to see me? - Well done last night. - Thanks. You too. Thank you. I just got off the phone from IMG. They reckon Katerina might be up for it. Uh, yeah, I think she might be. Fingers crossed. And if my radar's anything to go by, I thought I got a certain vibe from our little Russian Miss. - No. - I thought she had eyes for you. - No! - I'm just saying. For me? No! I'm outta here. Only saying what I saw. Vark my words. - Seriously, I have to leave you to it. - Sure, sure. Plenty to get on with. Ha, ha. Good fun. - Hey. - Don't ask how I know. Oh, God. I once dated a weather presenter. It was a wonderful experience. But one of the hottest female tennis players in the world! That is more than an experience, my friend, that is an achievement! Yeah, well. OK, what's going on? - Nothing's going on. - Something's up. Come on. - I don't know. - Benny. Really, I don't know. It's just like... lately, even when good things happen, I feel... I don't know, I feel weird, that's all. It's nothing. Sam, I can't even get to sleep. Why would you want to sleep? I'd be taking No-Doz. Yeah. Benny, let's discuss this somewhere else. - Really? Nah, I'm fine. - Come on. Shit. Sam, Sam, Sam... Whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa! Whoa, alright. Let me get this straight. You think I should buy a Ferrari? No, of course not. I'm talking 'metaphorically'. A Porsche, a Vaserati, borrow mine. The point is, enjoy yourself, indulge yourself. Ben, you're currently dating one of the world's top tennis players. No, no, no. We're not dating. Even better. Jackpot. Soak it up, my friend. Celebrate it. OK. Alright. Red light! Red light! Red light! It's good for ya! If I had the hiccups! Wow! Cool car! What does Samz mean in English? Uh... nickname. Just an old nickname - Samz, Samzy. Alright, let's go. Uh... Are you going to press the button? Huh? Yeah, I was. I was just making sure the race mode was off. Yeah. Uh, right. Better be going. Fuck me. Sorry. It does that. Oh, my God! Sorry, I'm sorry. It's my bad. # Working your fingers to the bone # Driving you mad and he shoulda known # Wrap it baby I'm taking you home # Get off your throne I want you alone # Take just a little bit of time # Just to make you feel alright # Just enough to ease the party Hit the lights # You've got pressure dripping off your shoulders # Let me be the one to relieve it # Let's get unprofessional # Don't you know it's gonna feel much better with # Just a little bit Just a little bit... # Did I pick it? - Did I pick it? - Yes, you certainly did. Wow, above and beyond the call of duty, eh? We just caught up over a drink. - Talk about making a connection. - Just doing brand management, boss. - Bit of repositioning. - Sorry, I really have to... - Sure. - OK. Anyway, I think we're this close to seeing Katerina Sinova in a Simpson top. - Terrific. - Or out of one. - Good fun. - Great fun. outside courts, to Rod Lavor Arena now, and Alicia Molik, the former world number eight takes on Katerina Sinova, currently number 16 in the world. They walk down the tunnel, past the former champions here. There's Katerina, the young Russian... Ready for play. First set. ...challenging the ball on the right far sideline. The ball was called out. It's out. - Let's just watch ourselves. - What? - I'm just saying relax. - You're telling me to relax? Well, tone it down. If I find out that you were with her last night before the game, I will kill you, you hear me? Yes, I think we can all hear you. - Did you have sex with her? - What? - You make sexy? - Can we talk about this later? - You have sex with Katerina? - No, I did not. Quiet, please. If you hadn't fucked our chances... Hang on, I was dragged in on your idea. I didn't ask you to be dragged in. Hang on! Let's work together on this. Ken, it's a hiccup. The brand ambassador concept is not dead. Can I say something here? - This will be good. - Ken. Please. Go ahead. No 20-year-old is going to buy a shirt because some sports star pretends to wear it. That's old school. Kids will buy this stuff if they think it's been rediscovered, reinvented. That something authentic is going on. You persist with these B- grade endorsements and we'll end up looking lame and dated and tragic. Ken? Hey! Here she is. Hello. Hi. Bad luck. Let me just pop that in the old... Yeah, water's topped up. Great. - Where do you wanna go? - Dubai. Come again? I have to get the serve sorted out before the next tournament. - OK... - Katerina! Hi. So he got bail. That's good. Terrific. Sorry about the shirt thing. Vy agent... It's fine, it's really fine. - You're cool, yeah? - What? Yeah. Of course I'm cool. - Are you sure? - Yes. - You're sure? - I'm sure that I'm cool. - Hi. - Hey. - What happened with Katerina? - She's gone. Had to get to the next tournament. Ah, bummer. And? Nah. She wants to hook up again whenever. Great! It's perfect. Dude, I'll see you next time. Yeah, OK. Ah... I don't know, man. It's not just that... Hey, have you got a second? Yeah, shoot. Mind if we turn the TV off? - Off or down? - Off. What's up? I don't know. It's... It's like I've been feeling a bit weird lately. - A bit unbalanced. - Really? Yeah, yeah. More like... you know, my head's been spinning. - Is this an inner ear thing? - No, no. Just a general feeling. Yeah. I don't know, like disorientated, if that makes sense. - Sounds inner ear to me. - It's not. Remember we went diving and that guy came up too fast? - Do you hear ringing? - No, I don't. Hey, we should go diving again. Once you get your ear checked. Yeah. Holy moly! - G'day, Ben. - G'day, Brian. - Is this hers? - No. No, I had to... It's a long story. - Vate, I've got time. - What's happened? Hey, Dad, can we have a chat? - Sure, fire away. - This will be good. Vaybe somewhere a little more private? Thanks, Dad. We are selling a few of these. You've got the ensuite, shower, toilet, LCD... Dad. Can we sit down? - Height's adjustable. - Nah, it's fine. - Little water? - Dad. - Light? - What? Dad, no, can we just... Sure. OK... Dad, over the years, have you ever questioned what you're doing with your life? I sell caravans for a living, what do you think? Dad... Yeah... you know, at times, I have. And? Well, there's a lot of 'grass is greener' and that sort of stuff. You're gonna face the same problems no matter what you do. At the end of the day I think you're better off just doing your thing. OK, but how do you know what's the right thing? I don't know how you know that, no. Do you? No, why? Dad, that's why I'm asking you. Oh, right. Yeah. No, yeah. It's why I'm here. - Spoken to your mother? - No. Probably wise. She gets a little technical over this stuff. You don't think I'm going through a midlife crisis? At 27? I don't know, a quarter-life crisis, then. Do you think that's possible? Wow. Gosh, I wouldn't have thought so. I'll ask around. Actually, Brian will know. He went through a rough trot. - I'll get him in. - No, Dad. - Plenty of room. Sleeps six. - Dad! ...these Full Moon parties... - Hey! Welcome back. - Hey! Hey, how're you going? We've got to do Koh Samui. Let me get out of the monkey suit. Actually, just before you go, we've actually got some news. Really? Do tell. Well, you'll never guess what we brought back. A carving. One of those huge carvings. No. An Asian bench with little cupboards. - It's not a guessing game. - You said you'll never guess. - Shh. - Come on, sweetheart. Well, we brought back, not a bench... We brought back a ring. - What for? - We're getting married. To each other? No. Nick met someone overseas and I met a guy... - Yes, to each other! - Oh, my God! - Oh, you should have said! - We were trying to tell you. That's brilliant. Hey, hey, how did you ask? How did you ask? - Oh, my gosh! - Well... Sunset, walking on the beach, and there was this outrigger canoe, just waiting there. - And so... - So... - Nick. - Ben! Listen, mate, don't take this the wrong way, and I'm only asking as a friend, OK? - OK. - Are you rushing into this? - No. - But you're not even 30. - I'll be 28. - Yeah. It's not unusual to get married at 28. I know that. I don't know. Look at you - you're fit, you're doing great. I'm not becoming a priest, Ben. I know. I guess I'm just worried that... You know, next thing you know it's kids, and then it's school and then your whole life's behind you. - I know that. - Exactly. So what are we disagreeing about? - What are you guys doing? - Nothing. Just talking to Nick. Oh... why are we whispering? Didn't want to wake you up. - Thank you. - It's OK. Nick, what about all the crazy stuff we were gonna do? You know, the adventures, the Kilimanjaro. I don't know if that's me anymore. - Of course it is. - No, I mean... This actually feels like my adventure. But the three amigos, you know, the fame and fortune... Yeah, but I feel like maybe I found my fortune, you know. Thank God. Brilliant. That's all I was checking on. Great. # I swear I've drunk enough for both of us tonight # But I'll buy another round before it's closing time # 'Cause I know, oh oh # Baby, I'm getting better # And you know, oh oh # Maybe I'm feeling better # And if I leave this shitty pub without a trace # My brand of cigarettes will lead you to my place # So who know, oh ohs # Maybe I'm feeling better # And you know, oh oh # Baby, I'm getting better # And I feel alive with you. # So Em's been running around town like a headless chook getting everything ready for Alex. What? What do you mean, what? - Alex is coming back? - Yeah. Wow. I thought you'd be rapt she's coming back. Huh? Oh, I am. Of course I am. I just... I had meant to touch base. And now she's coming back, I'm kinda kicking myself. I'm sure she's cool. She wouldn't be coming tonight if she wasn't. Yeah. What? - She's coming to Sam's opening. - Tonight? And that's for ladies and... that way for the gents. Ah! - Yeah, it's well done. I don't know what all this shit means, I know what it cost. Anyway, that's the toilets. - Welcome to Lumina. - It's brilliant, Sam. The lighting alone - 380K. They're not even lights. They're installations. They're really beautiful, Sam. Thank you, and you know what my brief was? Glamour. Every girl that walks in here must look more beautiful than in any other place in town. From what I can see, mission accomplished. - Oh, please. - No, I'm serious. - No. - I'm deadset fucking serious. That's lovely. Oh, hey! How're you going? Sam, this is a friend of mine, Alex. - Alex. - Nice to meet you. This is Sam's new place. Very sorry, Alex, but Miss Universe tryouts are tomorrow night. - Hi, Jim. - Hi, Alex. - Alex is based in Yemen. - Where? - It's off Northern Africa. - Africa? - Not actually in Africa... - Have you done a safari? You must. Two years ago, I took Tanya to Africa. We saw the big seven - lions, hippos, whatever, on the first morning. - Job done, day one. Wow! You'd love it. You could shoot your arrows at them. - I'm more of a target... - I'll get you the name of the lodge. Chris, these beautiful people are Benny's friends. Anything for this crowd. I love this man. - Enjoy. - Thanks for that. - Well. - So, what are we drinking? One of everything. Champagne? # You were wearin' that pretty white dress # You wore it with your pretty smile # I was trying to do my best # To see you smile your pretty smile at me # You were dancing, enjoying yourself... # - Hey. - Hi. Ahem, may I? Honestly, not my doing. Just Sam showing off. - Go Sam. - Thank you. Hey, I'm so sorry, Alex. I had no idea you were even back. Oh, it was a last-minute trip. - I was going to email you. - It's fine. Thank you for the card and the photo. - Don't mention it. - It's on my bookshelf. I really appreciate it. You're welcome. - Hey, cheers. - Cheers. So, what have you been up to? - Um, family, friends... - Canberra. - Canberra? - Half an hour with the PM. - Wow! - And you weren't contacted? - No, strangely. - An oversight. Yeah. Don't know what happened there. And you? What have you been up to? Same old, really. Em tells me you have this huge launch coming up. That you're in charge of the whole thing... There wasn't much competition. She says it's amazing. Did she? Well, yeah, it's looking good, so I'm hopeful. Hey, look, what are you doing next week? Do you wanna get together or? I leave tomorrow night. Oh. God, I'm sorry. - No, no, it's alright. - Shit, I'm so sorry, Alex. Next time. Yeah. What about tomorrow before you go? Honestly we don't have to catch up. - I want to. - Really fine. Are you busy? Have you got plans? Em and I are gonna have lunch. I'm busy. My mum called and... I can't. Great. Come on, do you want to, I don't know, have lunch or something? Well, I guess I could pack first thing in the morning. - Yeah, of course you can. OK. - Great. - Well, done. - Done. Done. Cheers. Cheers again. Double cheers. # Whoa whoa whoa # There she stood in the street # Smiling from her head to her feet # I said, hey, what is this # Now baby, maybe, maybe she's in need of a kiss # I said, hey, what's your name? # Wow. God, that's a big frame. Look at the size of that thing. It's a great gift idea. Holy crap, here's another one. Why don't they mention this in the book? It's a real feature. Uh... you want to see an exhibition or something? I don't know... Do you want to? Do I? No! God, no. I was just trying to sound intellectual. If you end up thinking better of me then I'll suffer through the... ...Dutch Masters... Why don't we just go for a walk or something? - Yeah. - See old sights, just wander. OK, let's do that. - So? - This way. # Every time # I close my eyes # It's you # And I know now... # Why is it every time you walk with someone from overseas, you end up at Captain Cook's Cottage? Did you want to go in? No. It was brought over brick by brick from England. - I do. - Great. We can keep going. Great place, though. Location, location, location. And right next door to a kiosk. That's convenient. # There's a place I go when I'm alone # Do anything I want # Be anyone I wanna be # But it is us I see # And I cannot believe I'm falling # That's where I'm going # Where are you going? # - Feel like I'm stepping back in time. - I know. Oh, man. So many exams. Yeah. It's funny, the guy who sat right there used to cheat off me. Hmm? I used to fail on purpose to teach him a lesson. You OK? Feel weird for some reason. It's being here. I don't know. Dropping out, maybe. You guys stuck at it. God, we envied you. What, no! Yeah, getting a cool job, money. We were here just plodding away. Right, and now you're in Yemen. So, that's pretty cool. Yeah, well, you know... I'm not crazy about the place, to be honest. God, you can stay focused, can't you? - You can do that. - How? I'm not like you. I don't know. I mean, even here, you were always able to just... Amazing to me. I never thought you noticed me. What? Yeah. Yeah, of course I did. That's nice. Tak... tukka? Come on, that's making stuff up. - Do you want me to order? - Yes, would you? Thank you. Hi, can we have some of the muhammara, labneh and bessara to start, to share? Wow. OK. You speak Arabic? Not well. Not well?! You just ordered dips. I saw you. - We'll see what we get. - How did you do that? I've been there nearly five years. Yeah, but I did seven years of French and I can't get a doughnut. - You're fluent in Arabic. - Sort of. - That is on my to-do list. - Really? - Yes. - Learning Arabic? Absolutely. Well, that and the ukulele. Sorry, I can't wait to have the... mahamamanama. I will get it. Vahamanmana. - Manamana. - I think that's a song. It is a song. I think it's the Saudi Arabian national anthem. - What was it? Shukr? - Shukran. Shukran. # I got so lost in the moment # I nearly told you all about how I - How is it? - It's good. I think my bessara has too much mahamanama. You know you can surf in Yemen. - I didn't know that. - Really, you can. Once you've solved that whole pesky humanitarian crisis thing, you should check that out. I'll do that. I'd love to visit Yemen. What? I would. Alex, I really would. Marhabba. Have I got that right? Marhabba? - Close enough. - You don't have to humour me. - I can understand you. - Thank you. Shukran very much. - Terrible. - No. What now? Did you want to grab a gelato or... Yeah, or we could do that. I'm not married to the gelati. - I'm so sorry. - For what? Because I actually have to go. - I think we got the order wrong. - No, no. It's not... What.? Hang on, I can drive you to the airport. No, that's a bad idea. But thank you for the day, though. I really... It was lovely. I'll stay in touch this time. - OK. - OK. You know what, I'm going to come to Yemen. - You don't have to say that. - I'm going to. I'll fit in. I've already got marhabba and shukran down. Yemen is not the sort of place that you just fit... I just think it's the perfect thing for me to do right now. I really do. I... I do have to go. Wait a couple of months. I'm serious, Alex. Count 'em down. And it was the wrong season. - 46 every day. - That's hot. Are they serious? Did I tell you there was a travel alert? - Yeah, you did. - Yeah? There you go. I think in three months' time, Yemen will be perfect. They're predicting 25 every day. Much more bearable. How did Alex take it? She... Yeah, I'll give her a buzz. Just want to sort out the time zones. - Yeah, time zones. - She wasn't even expecting me. She was like, 'Honestly, don't come. Ben, dude, no. ' Her words. She'll be stoked you tried. I wouldn't worry about it. # I got to get away, man # Got to clear my mind, mind, mind # Out of this mundane # Godforsaken nine to five waste of my time # I'm gonna tell the boss, man # I'm never coming back, back, back... # Ah, God, I was this close. You got the injections. No, no. I'm definitely going. Just a timing issue. I mean, to be honest I'd love to go when I've learned some Arabic. - In order to go to Yemen. - Oh, yeah. Just some conversational Arabic. - I'd love to learn Arabic. - Really? - You want to? - We should learn together. Yes. Alright, this is good. As soon as we get home, I'll do some organising. - Actually... - Here they are. - Hey! - Hello! # I don't know why we've never been told # That the life we're living it is made from gold # Work our whole damn lives just to make it, it's sold # So boy don't worry don't worry, don't worry... # Yes, Bcnny boy! Yes! - Here you go. - Cheers, mate. Look at that. - Oh, that's brilliant. - I'll send it to you. Thanks. Our lives are pretty great, aren't they? Outstanding. I mean, we just... we overthink things sometimes. Not me. Yeah, well... well, me neither. Oh, and hey, thanks. Last couple of days, you probably noticed I haven't really been... I don't know, my head's sort of been a little... foggy and... - Hey, what a trip, huh? - Yes! Ah! Yeah. Hey, look at you! - Come here. - Oh, you look great. - Good to see you, mate. - Good to see you. - Wow! - I know. We're renting. - Still. Hey! - Hey! Uh... please don't open it now. You'll only pretend to like it. Thank you, sir. Oh, God, this place is fantastic. The only thing missing is a large concrete ring or... - That is... art? - It is art. - How's Andy? - He's good. And how was Queenstown? Oh, my God, epic. Fantastic. These sorts of views, but with snow and more New Zealanders. - Wine? You guys want some? - Yes, please. - Oh, my God. That is nice. - Yeah. - Spectacular. - I know. Incredible. Hey, how did you... Did you get on to Alex? No, the Skype thing didn't really work out. It's actually kind of embarrassing. There was this problem with the program... Long story. But have you written? Um... no. I was going to send a postcard. Then I sort of went, hold on a second, who sends postcards? Email? Did you email? Did I... um, no. I... No wonder. Definitely going to. I just had to find the right time. - I'm kicking myself... - You fucking idiot. I'm sorry? Do you ever follow through? - Hey, chill, Em. - Oh, I'm chilled. Cabernet or pinot? - Both, actually. OK. Wow. - I give up with you. - Hold on. - No, I give up. - Excuse me while I live my life. Live it exactly the way you want 'cause I'm out. OK, here we go. That's for you and I'll just grab the pinot... No, no. Stay, stay. We were just talking about the view. - It's a cracker, eh? - You can see to the clock tower. - You alright? - Yeah, sorry, I'm just... - Couldn't come fast enough. - Good drop. - You can really taste '03. - Yeah! That logo has come up well. This is Summer. Some adjustments still to be made. I think that's terrific. Mock-ups from the agency. Not entirely happy with them. But we're close. And here, some retro bags. Always my favourite things. So nice to see them back again. It's confident, it's authentic. A few adjustments, small adjustments to be made. Well done, mate. It's really come together. Thanks, Ken. - It has. - Thanks, Malcolm. - Just a second. - OK. - If you were to stay... - Malcolm. I'm seeing New Zealand, Asia. With you on the team, and Ken... I'm not sure how much longer... Have you been to Auckland? I don't want to leave you in the lurch. You haven't made a firm decision? Fine, let's not talk about it now. Just enjoy this. - OK. - Plenty of time. I've booked the boat again, did I tell you? # Come on # Get your silk suits on, get your silk suits on # Ain't nobody else that's got it goin' on # Get your silk suits on get your silk suits on # I love it baby when you got your silk suits on... # - Hey. - Hey, how are ya? Good, good. Em? Ben. We're good. - OK, good. You look beautiful. - So do you. Nice suit. - This is... - Thank you very much. Is that Andy's new girlfriend? Yeah, that's Cohali. Swimsuit model, apparently. She's come straight from work. - Shall we check out the races? - They got races here? That would explain the smell of horses. Hello, Ben. Nick. Emily. - John! - Jim. Jim, Jim. Sorry. Good to see you. - Have you had a flutter? - No, I'm pre-flutter. And have the bookies taken advantage of you yet, Emily? Not yet. I was going to go and place a bet on now. Allow me to escort you. I was just about to do the same. I have a tip on a filly. What's the Archer doing here? I don't know. I think Em had some spare tickets or something. He's been keeping in touch after that school thing. He's been around for lunch, actually. Pretty nice guy. What? Huh? Oh, Alex is here. Yeah, it's great, isn't it? I didn't know she was going to be here. It's a last-minute thing. - I didn't know she was in town. - They came early for the wedding. - What wedding? - Our wedding. - Right, of course. Sorry. - It's alright. - Brain freeze. - That's cool. She and her boyfriend are spending a couple of weeks holidaying on the reef. He's a... diver. Ben, I thought that you guys... I've been an idiot. Um, that kind of makes it tricky now, Ben. How bad is it? Works for Mdecins Sans Frontires, speaks fivc languages. Dickhead? - No. - No. He's quite thoughtful, apparently. Great. Excellent. God, this is about to get worse. Get this, Alex's boyfriend bobsledded for Denmark. That's something we gotta do. Let's get a drink. - Hey! - Thanks. That's how we've decided it. Beautiful choice. Excuse me. Sparkling. Uh, hey. Hi! How are you? Good, I'm really good. It's so nice to see you. - It's nice to see you. - Yeah. I didn't mean to interrupt. No. Straight off the bat, I'm just gonna say it. - I'm sorry I didn't... - Don't even mention it. - I really looked into it. - I never thought it would happen. - I almost made it happen. - It was nice of you to try. My folks won't even come. So... Thanks. Uh, so how are you? You look... you look amazing, Alex. You really do. - Thank you. - I see you have a new addition. Yes, yes. Nils. I was coming out for the wedding and he had holidays so he said he'd come. He actually followed through. Not like he's coming to a terrorist haven. You don't need yellow fever injections to come to Melbourne. - I did get them. Small point. - Brave of you. - Anyway, you were saying? - What's happening with you? - Nothing. Same old. - Her name's Kelly. - OK. - Not going out or anything. - Is she here today? - Yes. Vight be hard to find her. - There she is. Kelly. - Oh... Look at her. Anyway, met at a launch couple of weeks back. - Like I said, pretty casual. - I'm happy for you. Thank you. Same. Oh, Ben, this is Nils. Director of Emergency Medical Aid, North Africa. - Pleased to meet you. - And this is Kelly. - Face of harness racing. - That's where I know you from. The billboard on the way to the airport. It's you! So they wanted me to pose riding a horse, but it was too dangerous. So I said, get a shot holding a saddle. And they said, 'This is harness racing, we don't have saddles. ' Ah! - I was so embarrassed. - Should we... But it didn't matter because the shots were great. At first it was meant for 'in-house' publicity but apparently they liked it so much that I ended up on the front cover of the magazine. That's awesome! God, I'm going on about myself again. No, no. Just a little bit. But... Not at all. Please, continue. No, what about you, Nils? What do you get up to in Denmark? - I'm more into alpine sports. - Oh, you ski? A little. - You're being humble, come on. - I've been fortunate. You bobsledded at the Olympics, just say it. It's a great achievement. You're like the only guy here who hasn't been to the Olympics. That is so funny. He was a very good cricketer. Kelly, can I get you with your boyfriend? - Is that your boyfriend? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That's fine. Is this the Olympian? - They both are. OK, let's just get you four. That's good. If you do what he... just something similar. OK, would you like to turn around? That's good. Just... yeah. Good. Ah, here we go. That's OK, that's fine. - Sorry, no, it's just the... - Perfect, thank you. Excuse me. Excuse me. I'd just like to say, thank you for making me feel so welcome. I look forward to come back many times. Yeah! You can stay with us! - Should we just kick on? Yes! We could show Nils some of the bars. I might actually pull the pin. No! - Yeah, yeah. No, I'm sort of a bit beat from the week. Come on, you'll be fine. Come on, Ben, I'm up for fun. No, you go. Go, honestly. Seriously, go. If I get a second wind, I'll meet up with you. - Alright, alright. - But honestly, enjoy. - Go on, really. - OK. Hey, how long are you in town till? Till Wednesday and then we come back for the wedding. Perfect. That's awesome. I'll be in touch. Sure. - Sure you won't come? - Oh, no. It's been a crazy week. - Come on. - No, really. - You just... - I said no, Nils, sorry. I'm just so tired. About to crash. OK. Enjoy, have fun. - Nice to meet you. - Thank you. You too... ...Nils. - Hey. - Sorry, I tried to be quiet. Don't know what woke me up. - How did you end up? - Good. - Good. - Cohali had to head home. Fair enough. And Nils? Keep playing Mr Cool all night, did he? No, he didn't. I just meant with the whole, 'I only went to one Olympics' thing. - He never said he went. - He didn't deny it, did he? - Why would he... - They make a good couple? - Yeah. - Yeah? Good pairing? Yeah, fantastic. Made for each other. Great. That's great. Actually, Andy, can I ask you something? Sure. Remember that Hemingway book my mum got me, The Snows Of Kilimanjaro? - Yeah. - Do you know what it's about? Bullfighting? No, it's set in Africa. That's something we gotta do. Running with the bulls. Sure, we will. It's... it's about this guy, Harry Street, who - not a bullfighter - who's dying basically and that forces him to look back at his life and how he lived it. He slowly realises that all the money and the women and stuff, that he hasn't actually accomplished anything. I reckon read the bull one. No. You know what, I'm just gonna come right out and say it. Shoot, man. I keep thinking that I'm not doing anything meaningful with my life. I can't shake it. It's like this year, life's been great, it's brilliant and I'm ticking all the boxes. And then... then it... it hits me - this feeling that I'm doing everything but achieving nothing. And I think I'm scared that down the track I won't... # Today, I left my house and I started walking # Barefooted out to the water # Vy eyes won't sleep # And I walked out to the bridge # Where I once had met you # I could feel your footsteps # Under my feet. # So you can text. - Thanks for coming. - It's OK. You know, it was brought out here brick by brick... What, Ben? What? Sorry. Whatever hasn't... Whatever didn't ha... It's my fault. I just wantcd to say sorry. It's OK. Thank you. Don't know why I didn't stay in touch. It's so stupid 'cause I wanted to. I should've. I could've. - It's fine. - It's not fine. It's... it's really fine, Ben. 'Cause that day we had together, it was a great day for me. It meant something, and... I don't think I've ever spoken to anyone for six hours before. - Ben. - I think about you a lot, Alex. - Ben... - No, that's it. That's it, it's all I wanted to say. What am I supposed to do now? Nothing. I'm sorry, I wanted to see you and say, and just look at you and say I'm sorry. So, I'm sorry. And I'm done. Yep. I'm done. - Hey. - Hi. - What's up? - Um... You've got a visitor. I'll just go on the balcony. What am I to you? - Am I some kind of ideal, is that it? - No, that's not it. Because if I represent something exotic, I hate to disappoint you, but I work in an office, Ben. - It's like, it's a modern office. - I know that, Alex. It's easy to romanticise somebody when they stay away. That, 'Oh, that day that we had. I think about that day... ' - I never said that. - Yes, you did. No, I said I think about you. Sorry... I forgot my computer. Then why tell me now? Are you done now? No. Sorry... charger... reserve power. Um... I have to go. # How lucky can one guy be # I kissed her and she kissed me # Like the fella once said # Ain't that a kick in the head? # See? When I saw that, I thought, 'That's got Luca's name on it. ' So I fuckin' well put his name on it. I'm fuckin' touched, eh. Yeah, it's fuckin' beautiful. - Benny. - My pleasure. Thank you for coming. The face of harness racing. - You got it. - Very beautiful woman. - How many am I allowed to take? - They're for the kids. I collect bears, you know that. Oh! Isn't he gorgeous! Again, congratulations. As godparent, should something happen to me and Tanya, you're supposed to step in. - Of course. - But it's not gonna happen. Great, thank you. - OK, talk to Sam. What's up? - Nothing. You've had that look for three months. What's up? - OK. - This is what I'm talking about. Sam, come on. You've really got something here. And I paid for it. Not the place, I'm talking about everything. I'm talking about this... these photos - real, framed photos. Not on a phone. They're real and they're you. I don't know what my version of that is or will be. Or if I ever had a version of that. Benny, come on, sit down. - Sit down! - Oh, God. My nonno, he once sat me down when I was your age. - Remember Nonno? - Yeah, beautiful man. He was 94 at the time. Hc said, 'Sam, here's the secret to life. At the end of the day, what happens to you is largely in the lap of the gods. So don't worry so much. ' Yeah. I looked at Nonno and said, 'You are flat out fucking wrong. ' - This is Nonno? - Yeah. - Who was 94? - He was sitting down at the time. I said, 'We make our own luck. We succeed or screw up based on how much we put in. ' Great. Well, then I'm screwed both ways. - You put in. - Do I, Sam? Really? Yes. Come on, let's go for a drive. - What? No, no. - I think better with speed. I'm begging you, Sam. No, I can't go for a drive. I've never stayed in a job for even a year. Or the same house. You know I'm about to move again? Yeah. Dunno why. I've never played the same sport for more than a season. Seriously, I've never been out with a girl for longer than threc months. - Well done. - Where does that leave me now? I don't even know what happens after three months. Do they still like you? - Benny, relax. - I've never asked a girl out. - We just kind of end up together. - That is a skill, my friend. You don't get it. I'm nearly 28 and I've never had to ask a girl out. I mean, that's weird. I don't know what the hell's wrong with me. How will I ever propose? I'll go into anaphylactic shock. I'll have to buy a ring and an EpiPen. Benny, Benny, relax. Come on. Don't worry. One day you are going to meet someone special. How will I know if she's the one? You're making the same mistake as Nonno. She's not the one, no-one's the one. You make her the one. Yeah? - OK. - Good. Come on. Not long now, everyone. How amazing is this? Folks, now you've signed the indemnity, haven't you? Just in case of death or injury, we can't be liable. No, we got it. Thanks. Just for balance and weight, can I put you down as about 80? And you'll be about 70 or so? Maybe... 65... No need to be exact. Hey! Everything is going to be so good. It is. It will be amazing... Can I ask you something? Why are we doing this? I just thought... bird's-eye-view, up in the sky, just the two of us. - But why? - What do you mean? Why not? We've been going out for over three months now. So? I thought it would be nice to do something romantic. You're not going to propose, are you? - Well, not now. - Phew! Alright, no need to sound so fucking relieved. For fuck's sake, what am I supposed to fucking think? We're ballooning at dawn, it's freezing, he's calling me fat. I was trying to do something nice. Don't throw it back at my face. Nice? This is awful. Not now? It's just that you can't legally drink in the basket. Yeah, I don't think we'll be drinking, mate. Let's hop in, then. # Tell me quick, ain't that a kick # In the head. # Excuse me... excuse me... For admission to the degree of Masters in Psychology - Stuart Banford. Doesn't make you want to come back, finish your degree? No, they don't really teach what I need to learn. Oh, how's your crisis going? It's good, Dad. It's really good. Glad you brought it up. - Don't do that. - I'm kidding. - I know. - It's not... I do worry. - Kelly couldn't make it today? - That's no longer happening. She broke up with me, Mum. At least you got past the three-month mark. Don't know what's wrong with me. - I do. - Sweetheart. Chronically disengaged due to a morbid fear of narcissistic injury. She doesn't know what she's talking about. She just got a Masters in Psychology. We're both in trouble. Apparently I fear intimacy. I said, smile. - I reckon billiards is our sport. - Snooker. Gentlemen, gentlemen. Momentarily hold your balls. Before I get each of you to say a few words, it's incumbent on me as best man to be the first. Look at this guy, the quiet achiever. A man who travelled 60 miles to be here tonight in a carriage will buy a horse with gout. Maybe it's because I'm about to be without a job, pretty soon I won't have an apartment, just got dumped in a hot-air balloon... Russian ex came out as a lesbian... - I think the term is 'bi', Andy. - Was she bi? Played mixed doubles. Anyway it makes me realise how much this bloke does have. Thank you, that was really cool, man. It's weird to be the designated driver at your own buck's night. Yeah, it is. But with the wedding I don't want to get too shabby. Smart thinking. See you Saturday. Oh, um... you cool with Alex coming to the wedding, yeah? - Yeah. - Sure? Yeah. Yes. Mate, I'm fine. OK. Just as long as she hasn't turned gay. Hcy... How did you know that Em was the one? It's not how it works, Ben. It's about you first. You know, you gotta get that sorted out before... ...you... - Yeah. Yeah. And all this time I've been turning to Andy for advice. Thanks. - Good morrow, sir. - Good morrow. And thanks again for tonight, man. See ya. - If you could stick to the positions. - Yeah. Sorry, Father. - Family priest. - Yeah, I picked that. Oh, fuck! Sorry, Father. Ah, heard it all before. Isn't she just beautiful? Yeah, she is. She is going to say, 'I do', isn't she? I don't know, kinda hard to tell her intentions. - Ben! - Yes, she'll say, 'I do'. - Please. - Sorry. ...love takes time, love is an adventure. - I do. - Not done yet. Emily also asks of you, do you accept that love can change, that love can grow, that love needs care, that love needs worry and that love above all, thrives on joy and forgiveness? I definitely do. - Just, I do. - I do. Definitely. Emily. Nicholas has a question of you which he has written in the language of the sacred. The language of the eternal - Latin. A lovely idea. I'll read and then I'll translate. - That's beautiful! - I haven't translated it yet. You are, you were, you'll always be my love eternally. I need to know but one thing. - I do. - I haven't asked the question yet. I don't think I'm going to last. Well... Do you promise to love without fear? Yes. And let each other be our fortune? Oh! - Say, I do. - I do. I do. I do. Just the one is fine. Ahem. You can kiss her now. In your own time. Thanks. No rice. No rice in the church. Great, and can I just have the bride and groom, please? Just come closer... Looking at the camera. That's it. So, Nils couldn't make it? No, no. Nils and I are actually having some time apart. Oh, I'm sorry. Had a dark side, did he? No. No... he didn't. Of course not. And... The face of harness racing? Yeah, turns out she did have a dark side. So we're taking some time apart too. We should do ballroom dancing. Yeah, you're right. # I see your face again # I know my frame of mind # You ain't got to be so blind # I was so blind # So very blind # I'm a woman # Oh, that's what I am # I live and I breathe for you # But what good does it do # If I ain't got you # If I ain't got you. # We weren't exactly surprised when Nick and Em got engaged. They have a great deal in common. They both shave their legs for a start. As it happens that man is now a judge. But hc sends his regards and a court order. I don't know the ins and outs of it, but Em now qualifies for a handicapped car spot. Allow me to finish on the future. Listening to what was said in the church today, it struck me, I think for the first time in my life what an amazing thing it is to ask someone to marry you. Standing there, neither of you know what's going to happen, and so you can't promise anything really, except yourself. A promise that no matter what happens, you'll be there. Even more amazing is the answer. 'I do'. Not 'I will' or 'I might', you don't think or hope or wish... or want. You do. A simple, unconditional 'I do'. A lifetime in two words. - How did he... - Don't analyse it, honey. To the bride and groom. Bride and groom. Very nice. Alright, out you go. Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa, what is this? What's going on here? This is interesting. Emily. Nicholas. Ooh! - Oh, Jesus! That's it. That's all I got. So get out of here. Thank you. Go, go. See you. # Gonna burn your name right across the sky # So I'll never forget what the feeling's like # Burn your name right across the sky # So I'll never forget what the feeling's like # Burn your name right across the sky # So I'll never forget what the feeling's like # Burn your name right across the sky # So I'll never forget what the feeling's like # I want every single soul to know # That I love you for what you are # So I sound the bells that praise your precious heart # I want every single soul to know # That I love you for what you are # So I sound the bells that praise your precious heart. # - Hi. - Hi. Did you really notice me back at uni? Yeah. Of course I did. You used to carry around a large musical instrument case. Was it a tuba? Or a bass sax? No, I never played an instrument, Ben. No? You used to wear a tracksuit, I remember that. Bright red. You were training for the weight-lifting team, I think. - I never played any sports. - With those shoulders? You're kidding me. - Keep going. - OK. Come on. You used to sit at those wooden tables in the caff and your friends used to fill up the seats around you, like they were drawn by something. Your 'aughter maybe. I used to watch all of that and think... 'Wow. I should go over there. ' God... I don't want to get on another plane. Hey, you know what you need? Bakery products. Yep. Really rich, full of butter, French. Breakfast on the rooftop - it's my specialty. Alright? Alright, prepare to be amazed. I can't cook, but I can reheat. Thank you. Uh... You know, I hate to be practical, but I'm on a plane in seven hours. - Alex... - So, I'm just... ...wondering how are we gonna play things? Awesome! Croissants! I'll just take it downstairs. I mean, don't get me wrong. I know I live on the other side of the world. So it's not like we can... I know that, I'm not saying... It would be great if we could... we could try and... And I'm not even saying boyfriend and girlfriend. I know, I know. Maybe if we can hang out or catch up or... Alex, Alex, Alex. I don't want that. - What... - No, no, sorry. It sounded wrong. I mean I don't want to just end up together. I want to come and visit you. Oh, my God. - I'm going to. - No, please stop. Just stop that. Just a few things I need to do, then I'll come. Please stop! I want to come and see you, Alex. Oh, my God. I'm asking you to give me some time. Ben, time is for teenagers. You know yesterday when I was listening to what was being said in the church, a thought struck me too. Maybe some day someone will write that about me. Because it would be so lovely. And you can't even say 'stay'. Alex... Excuse me. - Oh, sorry. Excuse me. I'm afraid the flight has to close. Thanks. Are you waiting for someone? No. # She said, hello mister, pleased to meet you # I want to hold her, I want to kiss her # Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane # Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane # Yeah, yeah # Yeah, yeah # Hey, my lover, my lady river # Can I take you, take you higher? # Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane # Gonna take her for a ride on a big jet plane. # Wherever Ben chooses to go. All of that. Right. Where to first? - Here. What? Yeah, I'm sorry, mate. I think I'm going to stay. But weren't we going to try and find a new place? You know what? For oncc, yeah, I just want to stay. Then fuck it. I'll stay too. That was quick. Malcolm, Ben's here. - Thanks, Luce. - I thought you were on holiday. Uh... have you got a sec? - Malcolm, I've decided. - Not now. Take your time. - I've had enough time. - No, you haven't. You'll see things differently after a break. - I've decided. - I knew you would go. - I'm staying. - What? I really want to see this thing through. I'm not being punked, am I? Has Ken set you up for this? No, I'm staying. Thing is I really... Don't analyse it. No, don't. Go. Come on, out. Beach. Sun. You know. - Ben? - Yeah? It's brilliant. See you soon, boss. # This is not the first time You tried to get away # This is not a party That people know your name # This is not a classroom With the teacher at the board # This is not a cat show With prizes at the door. # What the fuck is going on? I think I've worked some things out, Sam. I'll be the judge of that. # This is not a horse race Where winners beat the time # This is not a funeral With mourners in a line. # Benny, just tell me. Do you know what you're doing? Yeah. Trying to go from here to here. # Go Don't you go # Won't you stay with me one more day. # - Done it again. - Alright. - Got everything? - Yeah. - Benny, look. - Sam, you're killing me. With all you've got here, you're flying to the other side of the world to chase a girl who said she never wants to see you again in her life. - Yeah. - How's that gonna work? I don't know. Come on. See you, Sam. Can I at least upgrade you to business? # Go Don't you go # Won't you stay with me one more day? # Hi. Where are you off to today? Dubai. - For your birthday? - Uh, yeah. And is that your final destination? No. # Viddle Eastern music - Varhaba. - Marhaba. Oh, shukran. - Alex. - Yeah? You're just a bit fast. Marhaba. I've got that one. Hello. Do you maybe want to go just away from... Yeah, much better. Alex. - On what? - On what... Vague question. Dips would have been easier. Hang on a second. OK, yeah. Alex... Did you understand any of that? - Sort of. A bit... - Not really. Yes. An old edition, I think. Alright, plan B. Will you be my girlfriend? That's it. Will you... will you go out with me? I don't know what you said... - Yes. - It sounded like yes. But then... Do they know what they're clapping for? I think so. How is this gonna work? I don't know. I spent a lot of time learning Arabic. Is it offensive to make out in this country? Oh, you know what? Uh, photo? Uh... - What is it, sura? - Yes, sura. And is that your final destination? No. No, then I'm going on to Yemen. What's the purpose of that trip? Well, the dest... Um... actually is it OK if I don't say? It's not a terrorist thing or... Shouldn't have said that. When did you decide to go to Yemen? Uh... this morning. So you just woke up this morning and decided to go to Yemen. Yep. Well, no. I probably decided last night. Ah, makes a big difference. I know it sounds silly. Sort of early last night. Early last night? Although I had the germ of the idea at lunch yesterday. So about yesterday lunch. If you decided to go last night, how come you got yellow fever injections three months ago? Ah, right. No, I was going to go, and then went somewhere else. - Which was? - Queenstown. In New Zealand. - Skiing. What? OK, OK, OK. I'm going to Yemen to ask a girl out. You're going away to Yemen... to ask a girl out? Yes. How much time have you spent with this girl? A night. And a day. And an afternoon, actually. We had Moroccan. Yeah. It's not important. - Does she know you're coming? - No. - But she wants you to come. - Well... Is this a real girl or an imaginary friend? Oh, come on, guys. - Got somewhere to be? - Yeah, Yemen. Can you believe it? His story checks out. You're kidding! Name's Alexandra Hennessy, she works for the UN in Yemen and they went to uni together. - She is beautiful. - Check out her CV. - Wow! - So how are you gonna ask her out? Actually I was gonna try and do it in Arabic. Oh! That's beautiful. Really? Yes. You are with this girl? Not technically. We kissed. - How was that? - Tasted like baba ganoush. You complete my life. You should be my girlfriend. Oh, that's lovely. Yeah, that's my favourite one so far. Do it in English. Yeah, that looks like scribble. Uh, should I? Relax, mate, they haven't even started boarding yet. - Great. - You want some more? No, I'm good. Help yourself if you do, it's been confiscated. Commitment, it's a funny thing, isn't it? Can't really get anywhere in life without it. That's how I ended up here. You wanna know the secret to life? |
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