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Before I Fall (2017)
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Maybe for you there's a tomorrow. Maybe for you there's 1,000 or 3,000 or 10. So much time you can bathe in it. So much time you can waste it. But for some of us, there's only today. And what you do today matters. In the moment, and maybe into infinity. But I didn't know any of that until right before I fell. The thing is, you don't get to know. You don't wake up with a bad feeling in your stomach or see shadows move. If you're like me, you wake up 24 minutes and 47 seconds before your best friend is supposed to be picking you up. If you're like me, your last day starts like this. Well, I'll let you know by noon. Well, I can't organize a playdate before... You want something to eat? No. I'm good. Sammy, you like the bird I made you? Morning. Sammy! What? You forgot your gloves! Izzy, how many times do I have to tell you? Don't touch my stuff. Go back inside. It's cold. Hey, sexy. Get in! Okay. I love the sky on mornings like this. Hey. Greasy forehead, window, off. I'm gonna try not to be depressed because I'm single on Cupid Day. That's Valentine's Day to you! Do you have insomnia or something, Linds? Excuse me? It's just cute that you get up before us and get breakfast. Ooh. Did she just call me cute, Kingston? I believe she did, Edgecomb. Mmm-mmm. Al, Linds doesn't do "cute." No. It's not in her lexicon. Lexicon? Nice word choice. Whoo! Come on. Seriously? Okay, this was maybe funny the first bazillion times you did it. It's still funny. It still is. Still funny! Love it. Every time. Yeah, baby! No texting and driving. Don't worry. I'd never let my best friend die a virgin. Ooh! You didn't think we'd forget, did you? It's the big day, opening night. Rob texted me. He said, "I made my bed for you." That is so sweet. Yes. No glove, no love. You hear me? Take it! Take it! Take it! Take it! Take it! Take it! Take it! Shh! Okay, okay... - Watch the road. Oh, my God. - Lindsay! All right. I'm sorry. We're fine. We're fine. You're crazy! We're freakin' fine. Go ahead and say we're through I don't care, I'll just get another you I'll get another dude that look like you I don't need you and you don't need me Give me back my house key You can leave it with my new boyfriend You can leave it on the back back, back porch I don't care, when you leave it leave a message A message, a message, a message You used to never get the message Yeah, I talk shit Yeah, she's talkin' shit Go ahead and say we're through I don't care I'll just get another you I'll get another dude that look like you I don't need you and you don't need me Give me back my house key My house key My house key This could be easy This could be easy This could be easy This could be easy How many roses did you get last year, Linds? Twenty-two. I'm going for 25 this year, though, and more than one of them better be from Patrick. Did I tell you I sat next to Rob, and I had to make him fill out the request form? It was depressing. I'd be happy with 15. I'm not ashamed to admit it. Last year, Matt literally sent me a dozen red roses. Matt, oh, come on. You just spent a whole week crying in the same pair of sweatpants and it got dark. We're not going back there. No, I've told you a thousand times, I'll say it again, you do not need that loser. Honestly. Mmm-mmm. Nope. You got your real baes here. Mmm-hmm. We love you. Come here. Till death do us part. Even then. Oh, get in here. Mmm. All right, bitches, let's move! Sisyphus, not an STD. What's he like? What does it mean when something is described as being Sisyphean? Does it mean pointless? Brave? Late? Uh, sorry, it was an emergency and a tribulation. It was a minor LaserJet explosion. Hope the printer survived. All right, back to Sisyphus. What's his character like? Does he learn from pushing that boulder... Hey. Val-a-gram delivery. Happy Cupid Day. Go ahead. Relax, it's just roses. Aw, no roses for Anna. Is that from your boy? It's from Rob. Yeah. All right, all right. Keep it down. Keep it down, people. It's so beautiful. I'm in heteronormative hell. Okay, okay, let's hope third time's the charm. Okay? Sisyphus. Back to Sisyphus, class. Yo, Sam. Hey. Man. Sam, hey. Hi. Did you like it? Like what? Hey, so, um, big party tonight. Mom is going out of town. Whoa. A huge rager, you know. Why don't you come, yeah? I don't know what my plans are, like, what everyone else ends up doing... So I'll see you tonight. I don't think so. Yeah? You know the address. No. Kent... Smooth. - Did you guys hear about Anna? - You mean bull dyke. Please say she tripped over her nose. Not yet, but her girlfriend saw this Snap that we posted with her and that girl. She straight up dumped her. See? What? This is why I deserve some public recognition, for making shit like that happen. Maybe someone should give me a ribbon. Like the ones that you used to have hanging on your wall, Sammy, remember, from horseback riding? I was, like, ten years old, Lindsay. God, Sam, you were such a nerd back then. Okay, but isn't it weird how that stuff happens? How things connect in strange ways? Like if Lindsay didn't post that Snap... She deserved it. I'm just saying, it's kinda crazy now. I saw this video about chaos in the universe... Listen! How a bird flapping its wings in South America can create a major rainstorm in New York. Like how one person can watch a pretentious video about chaos while three other people actually die of boredom. It wasn't a YouTube tutorial, so you guys wouldn't get it anyway. Owie! Samantha Kingston. - Hi. - Hey, Rob. Did you get my rose? I did. Who are these ones from? Your competition. I want to see. Your competition. Oh, Sam has no competition, Rob. You know it. Okay. Well, neither do I, so I guess we're perfect for each other. So you're going to that thing at Kent's tonight? I heard he's getting a couple kegs. I don't know. Yes! I'll text you later. One more. No, I'm eating! Get out! Go. Bye. You all are too cute. It's gross. Mmm. Oh, you guys! Tonight our widdle Sammy passes into womanhood. I am so proud. Shh! Stop it. I hope you shaved. Oh, my God. Don't forget to pee before and after. Guys, guys, sociopath, 12 o'clock. Oh, God. Does she know what a brush is? No. Norma Bates! Hey, did she get her Val-a-gram? In chem, I was sitting right behind her. What'd she say? Does she say anything ever? Well, what'd she do? She tossed it right after class. She really should appreciate it more. It's probably the only rose she'll ever get. Maybe it had something to do with the card. "Maybe next year, but probably not." That's it, guys! Go, girl. I love it! It kinda looks like you put it on your cheeks. It's the same color. Yeah. That's the point. Mmm. Love it. It's so effing good. Can I post this one? No. Don't laugh at me. Okay. Linds? Were you nervous your first time? I was too drunk to be anything. Don't freak out if it hurts. Especially at first. And don't tense up, because that only makes it worse. Great. That sounds really romantic. Don't worry. It's not like Rob is some random guy. You actually like him. Right. Yes. Everyone wants to hook up with him. Yeah. Tonight, everything changes. That face. Baes! What are you doing? What do you think you're doing? Fart's house is actually kinda nice. If I had known, I would have stopped calling him Danny DeVito all year. Sam and you. Hey, I'm gonna go find Patrick. Will you be okay? What? I'm gonna go find Patrick. Will you be okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mwah! Hey, Sam! You made it. Sam! Sam! Hi! Oh, I am sorry. Let me get that for you. How drunk are you? I'm not drunk. Don't worry about it. Know what? You're the hottest girl in here. The hottest. Okay, look, I'm only gonna be here like an hour, an hour tops. You know? You text me and we'll go. We're just gonna go. Just me and you. Okay. Oh, my... Okay. Sorry. Oh. What happened? Nothing. I'll see ya later, okay? Elody's really embarrassing herself. Elody's a slut. Lindsay's a bitch and a drama queen. I'm rich and have ADD. Baes! Bae! Come on. Oh, get in here, baby! Patrick, will you go get me something a little bit stronger than this beer? What's the magic word? Blowjob. BRB. Thank you. Where have you been? I've been looking everywhere for you. Have you? Yes! Like in Patrick's mouth? Oops. What? Oh, she's so shitfaced! No, you're shitfaced, shitface. I can't believe high school's almost over. Aw. Well, actually, we did it right, you know? Kissed the hottest boys, went to the sickest parties. Do you think we'll remember any of this? I mean, like two years, three years from now? I won't even remember this tomorrow. Oh, my God. What's she doing here? Up. Okay. Hello, sweetie. Is that your first drink? You really should take it easy. You're a bitch! Excuse me? Whoa. You heard me. You're a goddamn fetid bitch just like your mother. It's no wonder Daddy left. Huh? - You're a bitch, too. - What? You're a drunk. And you... You're just pathetic. You know what? We'd rather be bitches than a psycho. Yeah, psycho. Have you noticed that nobody likes you? - Yeah, psycho. - Psycho. Has anyone at this party... - Has anyone talked to you? - I don't think so. You weren't even invited. That's 'cause you're a freak. Go back to the ward. Go home. Go home. Get off me! Get off me! Who are you? You're the bitch! Psycho! Psycho! Get this bitch on a leash! Psycho! You wanna go? Freak, get out of here! Go! Go back to the ward, you psycho bitch! Are you okay? What the hell was that about, huh? I don't know. She just called us bitches... What did she do? In front of everybody. So you attack her? Okay. This is not my fault! You gang up and pour beer all over her? You know what... Who are you? Come on... Do not touch me. You know, your boyfriend's throwing up in my sink. So, you wanna take care of that? Come on. Come on! That was insane. I'm sorry about Rob, bae. Music! Pacific Northwest, my ass. I hate this weather. Do you guys wanna get some food? I really need carbs. You sound like my grandmother. Meh. Here. Oh, I like this song. She called us bitches. I guess we are. What time is it? Did you see that look in her eyes? - I mean, she just snapped. - Yeah. She freaked me out. Sam, you're 20 minutes late! Let's shake it, sister! Sammy, you like the bird I made you? Mommy says you have to get up. It's Saturday. Mommy, Sammy won't get up! Don't make me come up there. Yeah? Sexy lady! What are you doing? I'm so sorry. I had a nightmare, so it's a slow start. Um... What happened last night? Oh. Sorry. I was FaceTiming with Patrick till, like, 3:00. Speaking of which, are you nervous for tonight? What? You, Rob, his flannel sheets? I'm gonna shower. Nope, no time. Come on. It's Cupid Day. Whoo! Seriously? Okay, this was maybe funny the first bazillion times you did it. It's still funny. Yeah, baby! Nice tits! Ooh. I have your present. No glove, no love. You hear me? It goes on him. Sisyphus, not an STD. All right. Keep it down. Keep it down, people. It's so beautiful. I'm in heteronormative hell. Thank you, girls. Thank you. Okay, okay, let's hope third time's the charm. Yo, Sam. Oh, man. Sam, you forgot this one. No, I didn't forget it. What do you mean? The more roses you get on Cupid Day, the more popular you are, right? Thanks for the tip, Kent. Noted. Well, I didn't say the rose was from me. But it is from you, right? Well... Anyway, my mom is out of town... Out of town and you're having a party? Yeah. Do you wanna come? Or... I have to go. Well, see you tonight? Or... Are you nervous? No, no, no, no, no. You don't want to waste the first night you go full womanhood. Okay, you sure they look good? I just really don't want to look like I'm trying too hard, you know? You're fine. Such a weird day. Like how? Just weird. I feel like I'm still dreaming from yesterday, like... Or maybe yesterday was the dream. I don't know... Whoa. You're awake now! No, no, no, no! Sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Don't. Don't do that. Oh, my God, there's so many hot guys here tonight! I'm gonna go find Patrick, okay? What? I'll be right back! Sam! Hey, you made it! Sam. Sam. Oh, I am sorry. Let me get that for you. Rob, I need to talk to you. What? About what? What's up? I'm feeling pranked. Tonight was supposed to be our special night... No, no, no, no, no. Rob? What? I don't feel good. I'm freaking out. It's always something. Can we go talk some... It's always something. Where? Okay, Sam. Okay. I'm gonna fill my cup up first. Five minutes. Can you wait that long? This room is off limits. I was just looking for the bathroom. Sorry. I feel like I'm having Dj vu with you being in my room. Oh, my God, I've been having Dj vu all day long. Are you okay? Yeah. Excuse me. I've been looking everywhere for you. Yeah? In Patrick's mouth, maybe. You seem a little guilty. Were you with Rob, you hussy? Skank. Harlot. Hey, are you guys talking about me? You know what? I think I'm gonna go home. No, no, no! What? You don't have to drive me. It's okay. I'll find a ride. No, we just got here. I'm confused. I thought you were supposed to get it on with Rob tonight. Yeah. Yeah, I changed my mind. Well, at least I'm not gonna be the only virgin. Oh, my God. What's she doing here? Watch this. Is that your first drink? You're a bitch! Just like your mother. No wonder Daddy left. Huh? - You're a bitch, too. - What? You're a drunk. And you... You're just pathetic. Juliet... You know what? We'd rather be bitches than a psycho. Yeah, psycho. Have you noticed that nobody likes you? - Yeah, psycho. - Psycho. Has anyone at this party... - Has anyone talked to you? - I don't think so. - Go back to the ward. - Go home. Go home. Get off me! Go to hell! Freak, get out of here! Get the fuck out! Get this bitch on a leash! Psycho! Psycho. You wanna go? Go back to the ward, you psycho bitch! What do you think people will say about you when you die? Like I care. I'm serious. That we're hot. This shit is morbid, Sam. Hey, watch the road. Hey. We need music. You watch the road. Guys, I'll find a song. I want to help you pick a song. Okay, mom. Guys, wait. Don't elbow me. Just pick something. You're trouble. You always have to pee. 'Cause she drinks too much. That, and she has the bladder of a baby squirrel. The truck. Truck? Watch out for the truck. What truck? How did you... It wasn't a dream. It really happened. Again. Sammy, you like the bird I made you? It's origami. Mommy says you have to get up. Tell Mom I'm sick. You don't feel hot. Stop it. Let go! Mommy, Sammy won't get up! It wasn't until then that I allowed myself to think the worst. Sam? What's this about you feeling sick? I just don't feel good. On Cupid Day? Did something happen? I don't know. Did you and Rob have a fight? No. Mom, go away. Please don't use that tone. I'm just trying to help. I just need to sleep a little bit longer. Please? Okay. Well, I'll let Lindsay know that you're going in late. But I have to be at work by 10:00. Thank you for driving me. Sure. Sammy... Hmm. You'll feel better once you see some of your roses. I don't know. Maybe. Well, you're lucky to be so popular. When I was a senior, I hadn't even kissed a boy. Everyone said my eyes were too close together and that I looked like a fish. Yeah. I have to get to work, honey. I think you're beautiful. Go. Bye. Maybe everything was connected. Maybe a flock of birds could cause a rainstorm and everything done could be undone. Maybe things could change. And maybe I could change them. It's Rob. We're having issues. But it's the day. The note in his Val-a-gram said "Love ya." "L-U-V ya. Luv ya." What is that? We've been going out since last year. Yeah. Well, you know, maybe he's just waiting to say it, like, tonight. I'm not gonna have sex with him just so that he says "I love you." I'm not gonna do that. We go out every weekend. Mmm. I don't know. I wanna stay in. Like we used to. Okay, but the only reason we stayed in was because we weren't invited to any senior parties. I just, bottom line, don't want to have to deal with that today. Okay? Okay. All right. What are you doing? - What is she... - Don't worry. Are you texting... Oh, my God. That devilish grin, though. Oh, my God. What? What? Why did he give me that... What did you say? Relax, I just told him that you got your period. That's a good one. Yes. That's perfect. - You're welcome! - That's a good one. Lock up the knives and babies! Does it smell like pee in here? Yeah, I can smell her from here. Remind me again. Why do we hate Juliet? Are you serious? We don't hate her. It's just she's super creepy with all those weird drawings. Remember Mellow Yellow in the fifth grade? Oh, my God. When Lindsay found out that she peed in her sleeping bag on the Girl Scout trip. Why do you care all of a sudden? You know she should be institutionalized. I was just wondering. That's all. So, we're going over to your house, right? Obviously. Can I borrow something? Always. I got you. Hey. Uh, these came for you in Daimler's class. I know I'm not wearing the appropriate attire, but I promise they're legitimate. Cool. Also, uh, this rose came for you. It's kind of like a painting of a rose. You know, it stands out in front of all the others. Thank you. Hey, I never said that it was from me. But, whoever it was from, they put a lot of thought into it. So... By the way, my mom is out of town this weekend, so I'm gonna throw a big party tonight. Yeah. Did you remember the address? Or do you... Hey, Sam. It was third grade, so you probably don't remember. But do you, uh... You think you'll come? Or... No, I can't. Sorry. Oh, come on. Well, I'm... I could have crutches on call for you, in case you want to climb up the tree... Kent. And play flying squirrel. That was one time. Look, I'm just saying. I'm prepared. I'm prepared. Okay, glad to hear it. So, that's a maybe, or... I don't think so. Well, I'll take that "No" as a "Maybe." So, maybe I'll see you tonight. Oh, God. Juliet Sykes just arrived at the party. Gross. Yeah. The worst. I'm so glad we didn't go. Mmm. Snapchat alert. Rob is totally puking in the kitchen sink. Oh, I want to see that. I wanna see that. Of course he is. I don't wanna see it. It's gross. ELODY: Ew. You kiss that? I can't believe you made this ice cream, Ally. It's literally better than a restaurant's. No, it's true. I mean, you should go to cooking school. Screw college. Thanks, guys. It has no dairy. Oh, you're so full of shit. Thirty-eight. - Okay. - You can shut up now. What? Matt's at the party. Ally, you say "Matt" one more time and I will kill you in your sleep. I will kill you in your sleep. I will kill you in your sleep. 12:39. I wonder what filter Terri uses on her photos. Major Fomo. Such a loser. Ugh, Steve's flirting with a freshman. I love you guys. Aw, Sam... We love you, too. Aw, we love you, Sam. Weirdo. Don't go emo on us. Shit. Where's my phone? Juliet Sykes is dead. She killed herself. But nothing happened to her at the party. How totally insane. Could our rose have something to do with it? Don't be stupid. God, imagine how her family feels. Look, you can't be mean to someone forever and then just feel badly when they die, okay? We all knew she was crazy. God, Lindsay, she was your best friend in fifth grade. Yeah, I remember you used to sleep over at her house. Yeah, well, that was before she became a sociopath, Ally. I'm going back to sleep. I'm going to sleep in my room. I'm going with her. You were friends with Juliet? No one even talked to you in fifth grade, and I don't hold that against you. You never said anything. We made fun of her for all these years... It's not our fault. Go to sleep. I did everything right. And nothing changed. I woke up this mornin' Didn't recognize the boy in the mirror Then I laughed and I said Oh silly me, that's just me Then I proceeded to brush some stranger's teeth But they were my teeth and I was weightless Just quivering like some leaf come in the window of a restroom I couldn't tell you what the hell it was supposed to mean 'Cause it was a Monday, no, a Tuesday No, a Wednesday, Thursday, Friday Then I woke up this mornin' The day starts and ends the same, regardless of anything I do or say. If that's how it works, I'm gonna do and say whatever I want. Oh, no, you're not wearing that to school. My Cupid Day outfit. Yeah, well, you don't want to give people the wrong idea. What idea is that exactly? No, this is not happening. Go back up and change, please. This is my life. I'll do whatever the hell I want with it. Dan, can you just jump in here, please? Look, Sam... That's so disrespectful to talk to your mom... Hey, Sam! Here... I told you not to touch my stuff! That's it! You are grounded! Grounded? I'm already grounded. Samantha! Maybe I was dead and in hell. Maybe I was alive and in hell. But it didn't matter. Nothing mattered anymore. What are you wearing? Funny. Excuse me. Jeez, wake up on the wrong side of the bed or something? For a few days now, yep. Nice tits! What happened to Sam? Uh, someone forgot to take her happy pills this morning. I took mine. Well, I know something that'll cheer you right up. I swear to God, Elody, if you hand me a condom right now... But it's your present. For your special night. Take it. Unless you want to be a walking STD farm. You would know. At least I'm not still a virgin. What the hell is wrong with you? What did you just say to me? What is it? Do you feel like you need to prove to us that you don't give a shit? Is that what it is? 'Cause guess what? You don't need to prove anything. We all know that you don't give a damn about anybody but yourself. We're all pretty fucking clear on that! What the hell is your problem today, Sam? You guys, don't fight. Just drop it. What, you don't agree? Leave her out of it. Why? You're the one who talks shit about both of them all the time. "Look at Elody climbing all over Steve." "He doesn't even like her. Look at Ally." "Oh, my God! She's such a know-it-all." "She just loves the sound of her own voice." "Hope Elody doesn't puke in my car again" "and make it smell like alcoholic." Stop it, Sam. Out. Get out! Now! I'd love to hear what you say about me behind my back. Sisyphus, not an STD. Don't say it. I'm in heteronormative hell. Okay, thank you. Thank you, girls. Thank you. Okay, okay, let's hope third time's the charm. Okay? Sisyphus. Sam! What? You can take 'em. Oh, Sam, you're breaking hearts left and right. Am I breaking yours, Mr. Daimler? What? Your heart, am I breaking it? No. You're not. My patience, however, is at its breaking point. Take a seat. Please. If you insist. Okay. Sisyphus. Sisyphus. Why is our friend Sisyphus still relevant today? Why is the story still relevant today? Don't even think about it. Turn around. That way. Bye. Get this bitch out of here! Psycho! What the hell? Shit. What are you doing in here? This is my bathroom. Nice shoes. Hard to walk in, huh? I can walk in them just fine, thank you. Aw, you need a pair of these. Comfiest shoes I ever owned. Really? All right, your loss. Whatever. You wanna trade? Like, switch shoes? Come on, Kingston. See if I can get in those without... Just get out. Hurting myself. Come on, let's try it. Why not? What? Yeah, let's do it. Come on! Why do you guys hate me so much? I know you know what's written in this bathroom somewhere. It's AC... Equals... BD, right? Anna Cartulo equals bull dyke. Or maybe it's "biggest douchebag." But I reckon that honor definitely belongs to Lindsay Edgecomb. So, is that it? 'Cause I'm gay? I don't know. Isn't that how it always works out? There's somebody laughing, there's somebody being laughed at. Right. Look, whatever. Really. I mean, this whole high school thing's just a blip. I'm not gonna remember any of you. I win. Do you ever feel like you're living the same day over and over again with only, like, a few things being different? Oh, shit, Samantha. You just described my whole life! Hey, what's up? Hey, Sam. Did you have to ask permission to talk to me? Lindsay's just really upset about what you said. You should apologize. Well, everything that I said was true, so... It doesn't matter if it's true. She's Lindsay. She's ours. We're each other's, you know? Just apologize. You're not listening to me. I'm not sorry. Please, Sam? Why do you care so much, Elody? Because... You guys are all I have. Are you still trying to turn her against me? You're the horrible driver. You're the one always criticizing people and hurting people. You're the one who lied about being friends with her and then tortured her for all these years. I just followed along and yet... I'm the one paying for it. Sam, what are you talking about? Whoa. What? Oh, my God. Sam, I haven't seen you in, like, forever. Where have you... Get this bitch on a leash! I love you. Is that what you wanted to hear? Go back to the ward, you psycho bitch! Sam? Hey, are you okay? Obviously, you're crying. But is there something I can do? I'll get you a tissue. Yeah, yeah. Thanks. Yeah. Sorry I'm in your room. I know there's a sign. No. Don't worry about it. The sign's just really for other people, so they don't get in my stuff. It's the first big party I've ever had, so... Why'd you have one now? I figured if I had a party, you'd come. I like your room. Yeah? It's my dad's old den. It must get a lot of light. Yeah. It's like waking up in the middle of the sun. I get to see the old tree. I like it. It's constant. Is that the one we used to sit in? Yeah. Yeah, we did. Do you remember climbing up it? And then you jumped down and sprained your ankle? I was stupid. It was very ambitious. I should go. Hey, hey, hey. Hey. Just stay for a second. Okay? I can drive you home or... I don't want to go home. Okay, well, you can, uh... You could crash here if you want. Not, like, with me. Somewhere else. I'll be somewhere else. Bed completely to yourself. The Kent McFuller master suite. Yeah? Okay. Hey, it's okay. Here. I'm sorry about earlier. Don't worry about that. No, I'm sorry I've always been so mean to you. Don't look. Don't read it. Please? Why? It's... It's something bad. Okay. Your skin's so hot. It's always like that. I wish we could be here forever. Okay, let's try again. We're taking a day off. I think you're just gonna drool around. What is it? And then you're just gonna go through there and then like that. If I was going to relive the same day over and over, I wanted it to be a worthy day. But not just for me. Do the kids at school ever make fun of you for the way that you talk? Sometimes. You can do something about that. You know, you can learn to talk differently. But this is my voice. How will kids even know it's me talking? When I was in the fifth grade, this girl used to sing this song. She smells like manure and she lived in the sewer Samantha Kingston Who did that? Lindsay. How come you're so mean to Mom? I'm not mean to Mom. You drew a line on the floor with nail polish and said she couldn't cross it. Mom and I had a fight, and I was mad at her in the moment, but I didn't... I didn't think that she'd actually stay away. Look at that. That's just the outside, how pretty it was. Oh, my gosh. Look at you guys. - Can you send those to me? - Aw! So cute! Those are beautiful. Remember when you used to come here all the time? I do. Of course. Then your daughter got too cool, so... I'm just kidding. IZZY: Can we go watch the pizza? Okay. Wait, tiger. I'm glad we did this. Yeah. It was really sweet what you did today. Do you think I'm a good person? Of course I think you're a good person. But it doesn't really matter what I think. I mean, what's important is what you think. No, I'm serious. I want to know... Why do you think that I'm a good person? Do you remember when you were a little girl? You used to take turns riding all of the horses in the stable so that none of them would feel left out? Do you remember that? I do. Mmm-hmm. But I was a little girl. It's different. But you have a big heart, Sam. That doesn't go away. One good thing. You just focus on that one good thing, and you see where it leads you. How is it possible to change so much and not be able to change anything at all? I knew I had to do something. Something good. You made it. Oh. Sorry. The room's off limits. No. Forget the sign. It's no big deal. That's really just there for other people, so they don't mess with my stuff. I'm glad you came. Yeah. I had to. I like what you've done with the place. Yeah, this used to be my dad's old den. Now it's the Kent McFuller master suite. Yeah, not so good in the morning, though. It's like waking up in... In the middle of the sun. Yeah. I hope you don't think that it's weird that I'm here with you right now. Sam, um... I once wore Crocs for 365 days straight, so I don't think anything's weird. I forgot about your Crocs phase. Yeah. Why are you always so nice to me? Well, do you remember in third grade right after my dad died? We were in the cafeteria and I was crying, and Phil Howe came up to me, called me a baby, and then smacked my tray right out of my hand, and food went flying everywhere. I remember what we were eating, too. It was, um, mashed potatoes and turkey burgers. And you came over, you scooped up the mashed potatoes right off the ground and you went up to Phil and you smashed the mashed potatoes right in his face. And you then said, "You're worse than a hot lunch," which, at the time, was a really good insult. I mean, I didn't laugh more that day than... I mean... It was the first time I laughed since my dad died and I... Do you remember what I said to you? "You're my hero." Yeah. And that day I vowed to be your hero, too. No matter how long it took. Look, I'm sorry. No, don't do... Don't be sorry. It's okay. Good. 'Cause I'm not really sorry. Shit. Wait. Sam! Hey! Sam, wait, I... Oh, my God, Sam, did you see that? Hey, Sam. Did you see where Juliet went? Juliet, stop! Juliet! Juliet! Wait! Juliet! Juliet! Juliet! Juliet, wait! Juliet! Juliet! Juliet! Juliet! What are you doing? I know what happened back there. Get away from me. And I feel really bad about it, and I know this may sound crazy, but I have a feeling I may be able to understand you better than you think that I could. You hate me. I don't hate you. I know we haven't always been the nicest to you, but the thing is that Lindsay didn't mean anything by it. We didn't know what we were doing. I used to be friends with Lindsay. It was right before her parents got divorced. I used to sleep over at her house. Her parents would be fighting so bad. She was so upset. She was so upset, she started wetting the bed. You remember the name you all gave me in fifth grade? The name Lindsay gave me? "Mellow Yellow." Remember that? You remember the camping trip when I supposedly peed in my sleeping bag? It was Lindsay. Lindsay's the one who peed. When everyone asked what happened, she just pointed her finger at me and screamed, "She did it." Juliet... Please let me help you. It doesn't matter now. Hey. It's like your Val-a-gram always said... "Maybe next year, but..." "Probably not." Juliet. For the first time, when I wake up, I'm not scared or confused or angry. Because, for the first time, I truly understand what needs to happen. I truly understand how to live this day. Oh, thank you. Yeah. Want something to eat? I'm good, thanks. Lindsay's got it covered. Mom? Oh. I love you. I love you, too. What, no love for your old man? I love you, too, old man. Thank you. Thank you. Sammy, you forgot your gloves! What would I do without you? Hey. You are perfect the way that you are, Fizzy. Always remember that. I can't breathe! It's cold! Yeah. What are you doing? Auditioning for a Tampax commercial? Let's go. Yeah, baby! Nice tits! Get in! Yes. You know how I like it. Hey, Elody. What, do I have white stuff on my face? You know why I love you? I love you because you're down for anything. Always. You know I'm a down-ass bitch. You are. Hey, I'm down, too. Ooh. Okay. No, I love you, Ally, because you're curious about the world. And you're passionate, and you are driven. Did someone swallow Oprah this morning? I love you, Linds. I love you because you're the kind of friend that toilet-papers Jason Foster's house for a week straight all by herself just because he said that I was a bad kisser. Asshole. Oh, uh, I think I know why Sam's in such a good mood. Oh. It goes on him. Thank you so much for that. Sisyphus, not an STD. Sorry, it was an emergency and a tribulation. A minor LaserJet explosion. Val-a-gram delivery. Happy Cupid Day. It's so beautiful. I'm in heteronormative hell. I like your boots. Sisyphus fails every time, but he still thinks that he'll be able to push that boulder uphill. He's imprisoned by his own hubris. The only way to escape is to change. Be careful. Oh, man. Sam. Hey. Hey. Um... "You're my hero." You got a secret admirer? Secret? That's not so secret. I don't know what you're talking about. Well, um... Well, hey, listen, I'm having a party tonight. Mmm-hmm. And I was wondering if you maybe wanted to come, maybe? Yeah? No? What's in it for me? What's in it for me? Yeah. And, um, I have something I want to tell you later. A secret. Later? Okay. Yes. Okay. Wait, the "you're my hero" thing, how did you... Thank you for my beautiful rose. I love it. What'd you say to me? This is not working out. Okay, Sam, you can't break up with me. I think I can and I think I just did. I should've picked Elody. What just happened? You guys were supposed to... I mean, you said you wanted to... It's Rob Cokran. He doesn't deserve me. Nonetheless, very shocking. Sociopath, 12 o'clock. Uh-oh. Does it smell like pee in here? Stop. Norma Bates! What? Just don't. But it's Juliet. Exactly, it's Juliet. She has a name and she is a person. Yesterday, you said you were afraid she would bite you if she got too close. That was a long time ago. That was yesterday. Hey, Linds. All right, well, let's do this! Linds. What? How come you never told me about your parents' divorce? Are you serious? Yeah. Why would I talk about something that happened a thousand years ago? Because it happened to you. And you matter to me. I don't know what you're talking about. Come here. Okay? Let's go inside. Come here. You know you don't have to act so tough all the time. Mmm. Don't worry about me, okay? I love you no matter what. Let's get inside. Okay. Move, move, move. Hey, um, you made it. Come with me. What? Okay. What? I believe you owe me a secret, right? I believe I do. Okay, so let's hear it. The secret is yours was the best kiss that I've ever had in my entire life. Um... But we haven't kissed. I mean, not since the third grade. Better get started then. I don't have much time. What was that for? Because I wanted to. I love you. Juliet, I need to talk to you. Just for a second. It's okay. Please? Actually, I kind of have somewhere I have to be. I know what you have planned for tonight and I want you to know that you don't have to do this. Okay? You don't know anything. I know that you have something to tell me. You have something to tell all of us. You're a bitch. I have been a bitch. I have been a bitch. We all have been bitches, and I... I'm sorry. I have to go. Listen to me. I'm trying to tell you how sorry... I am sorry. You said that. I'm sorry, but I have to come with you. Leave me alone! I can't. Sam! Sam! Why did you run away from me? I can't talk to you right now. You've been ignoring me for years, and then you... You kiss me and then go back to acting like I'm invisible? I meant everything that happened back there. That's all I can say, that I meant it, and I wish it hadn't taken me so long. Sam, are you in trouble? You can trust me. You can trust me back. Juliet! Juliet! Juliet! Juliet! Juliet, don't! Wait! Wait! Why? What's going on? Why are you following me? Why can't you leave me alone? You don't want to die. You want the pain to stop. Stop. You stop. You don't know me. You could never understand. You have a choice, Juliet. Not everybody gets that. Sam! Please let me help you. Don't you get it? You can't help me. I can't be fixed. You're not the one who needs fixing. There is nothing wrong with you. Don't let anyone tell you that there is. This is just a blip. Your life will change, Juliet. If you just hold on for one more minute. It's too late. No, it's not. It's never too late. Juliet, stop! Maybe for you there's a tomorrow. Maybe for you there's 1,000 or 3,000 or 10. But for some of us, there's only today. And what you do today matters. In the moment and maybe into infinity. I see only my greatest hits. I see the things I want to remember. And be remembered for. That's when I realized that certain moments go on forever. Even after they're over, they still go on. They are the meaning. Sam? Sam? You saved me. No. You saved me. |
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