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Bunker of the Dead (2015)
Run! Come on! Run!
Run, Debby! Come on, down! Down! Down! You have to run. Run! They're coming. Come on, Debby. Where's your fucking exit? I'm running out of ammo. We're close! You said that a minute ago. Fuck! There's too many of them! Why don't they attack? Batteries not included? Heil Hitler! No. Fuck it. BUNKER OF THE DEAD This suit is awesome but they'll never let us pass with this. No prob. We'll cover it with a jacket. -Great, man. -Just like Clark Kent. Put some glasses on and everybody believes your someone else. -Whoo-hoo! -Does it fit? Yup, but this stuff is heavy. That's the batteries for the 3D camera and lights. Gives you power for nearly 24 hours. Yeah. Great. You don't have to carry it. You just got to endure it Bruce Lee style. Wah... Come on! Come on! Come here come on. -Come on. Like this, pussy? -Okay. I surrender. Hey, kids. I hope that's just cops and robbers and not what it looks like. You want a free ride? You're gonna be proud of your brother when I'm famous and on every vip list of every party in town. Yeah, sure. Make me proud and let me borrow your car tonight. My car? Of course. Thanks a lot. Now I'm already proud. You like what you see? -Yes. -Cool, but there's something itchy and scratchy on my neck. -Could you...? -Yeah. -Where? -More to the left. -Left. Left. -Left? -Right. -I don't see anything. -But I do. -Nope. Just cloth. Nothing else. Already better. Much better. -Thank you. -Welcome. Well, sweethearts. Then you two have fun with whatever you're up to. See you later. Yeah. Bye. Jeez. She's giving me a hard-on. She's so hot! I need that tape. -What? -Did you just film my sister's tits? You want a copy, too? You just filmed my sister's tits! Chill it, man! We're in the middle of unveiling one of the last secrets of world war ii and you're filming my sister's tits, man! -Man, boobs in 3D! -Give me the camera! -Did you get a signal? -Yeah. What's your ugly face doing on my arm? I told you. That's the live feed from my web cam. That's how we can stay in contact. Cool. Let me have a look. Awesome! I can see myself on TV! Cut it out. -Fuckin' idiot! -Can it play movies, too? Hey! Your sister's movies? Let's go. Look, it's a little bit late. If you wanna change your mind... What? Why? Well, I could do some more research, -improve the suit. -Come on! This is the thing we've both waited for years. The big secret, the conspiracy -the fucking gold! -[Thomas I'm just saying... Then stop saying it! Okay. It's too late now anyway. -What? -The cam. Hurry. Take off your helmet. Hey! Give me... take it off! We are not the droids your looking for. Yeah, right. That'll make me laugh when I'm off duty. What do you two cinderellas want? And why the hell is he dressed like a north Korean spy? We're visiting my dad at the shooting range and my buddy here wants to blow off some steam. Right. Does the old man know you're coming? Affirmative. Here. Should we call him? Nope. It's fine. Make sure you stick to the main road. Don't stop until you get to the shooting range. Copy that? -Stick to the main road and don't stop. -And don't get any stupid ideas. -Never, ever! Yup. Say, the permit, was it real? What do you think? You are the man, man. Stop the car. Stop the car. Here it is. Suit you up and go. Okay. Keys? I got your promise, not a scratch... promise me. Not a scratch... I'm serious. Dead serious. I'll kill you! I'll revive you and kill you again and again and again! -I... -Yeah, yeah. Just watch it. Hey, sicko. Wait up. What? -Here. -The diary? Watch your back. You know me. Exactly. Hey, bubba, I found the inner fence. Are you sure it's the right one? I think so. It looks right. -What about the guards? -Forget 'em. -They're not here. -Electric fence? -Off line. -Are you sure? -Yeah. I checked. -Okay. Then let's do it. God! Let go! Markus, let go! Please! Don't die! Please, Markus, don't die! Markus! Markus? Damn! Fuck... Fuck you, man! You should have seen your face! -I almost had a heart attack. -Someone just shit his pants. I hope you step on a fucking landmine you cocksucker. Yeah, but you would like that. Just for the record, I knew you were kidding. -Of course you did. -You're still an idiot. You're welcome. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! What? What's wrong? -What's wrong? There's a patrol! -What? -Did they see you? -I don't know. Fuck! They're stopping. Don't do anything stupid. Did you hear me? -Quiet. -Markus! Hey, what's wrong? There was a guy on the street. I saw him. Come on. That was just a stupid animal. Bavarian yeti... whatever the fuck they call it. It's wolpertinger. Yeah, wolpertinger. Sounds like a bratwurst. Hey. I don't care. We got a job to do here. All of a sudden, you give a shit? Yeah. It's probably nothing. Of course it's nothing. Just like your girlfriend. She's still better than your right hand. And I have to take a leak. What the...? What? Man! Man! -Man! -Speed this up! Fuck you. Small things have big beginnings. Seriously, man. Dude, I'm off duty in 30. Let's roll. 'Bout time, motherfucker. Next time, bring a diaper! No, no, no, no! What? You have your phone? -Shit. -Great, now we're done for. I come in peace! God! Tell me where to go! No way! Left. Go left. -No, the other left. -You mean right! Shit! Markus! Hey! Stay right there! In your dreams! Shit. My dad's gonna kill me. What a bunch of losers! They're as slow as bubba! What? No, no, no, no. No, no. Don't move. Don't move, baby. Don't even think about it. Sorry about that. Ext time, you'll get a kiss. -Hey! Drop the gun! -Here. Hey, give me a call! The dam. I found it. The dam, bubba. I found the damned dam. Bubba? Bubba! Can you see it? I don't wanna talk to you anymore. Shit. There's a guard. Now stop being a pussy and tell me where the entrance is. It's somewhere at the bottom of the dam. Okay. Piece of cake. Yeah. Just make sure they don't see you again. Roger. Cloaking device activated. Would you please take this seriously? Relax. Stein wrote in his diary about a steam exhaust. -Look for that. -Exhaust. Okay. -Can you see it? -No. It's full of water. You didn't tell me about the water! That's why it's called a "dam." Have you lost your mind? Do I look like a fucking sailor to you? No! Wait! Markus! Hello? Thomas? Thomas, can you hear me? Thomas? Thomas? Thomas, do you copy? Thomas. Thomas, do you copy? I copy! You're alive! Thank god you're alive. -I seriously thought you were dead. -Man, me, too. I'm okay. I'm okay. -Just a scratch. -I lost you for over 2 minutes and the army's looking for you. Where the hell are you, man? I have no idea. I have absolutely no idea but you gotta see this. What... What the...? Holy cow. Isn't that crazy? Look at this shit. This could be the exhaust Stein was talking about. Bubba, this is it. No doubt. Going in now. Be careful. Shit. This is awesome. I'm the first human being down here. I feel like Lance Armstrong. -It's "one small step for"... -Neil. -What? -Neil Armstrong. It's Neil Armstrong and his steps. -You idiot. -Are you sure? Yes, I am. Okay. Okay. I trust you. What's wrong? Dead end. Looks like I have to dive. Set up the hub before you do. I hope those things work. They'll do their job. Trust me. Okay. Then let's see where this is going. See you later! Shit, is the water cold! -Are you all right? -I'm okay. Okay. This... man. This is man-made. -This... -Look at this. We really found it! Yes. This is crazy. Fucking crazy. -Hub up. -Okay, bubba. Up. Okay. Where do you want me to go? The gold should be on the second level. You gotta find a way up. What the fuck? Do you see that? I see it. But what... Wait, that's it! That's what we're looking for. -What the fuck? -What? I wonder what happened down here. But, Markus. That's disgusting! Then stop touching it! God. Just want to see if it still works. After 70 years? Never. Great. Made in Germany. What was that? -Did you hear that? -I did. Maybe it's air shifting or bats. Bats? I hate bats! Hey, by the way, did you actually think about how we can get all the gold out? Let's just find it first. Yeah. Markus? Markus, I'm losing the signal. Hey... Hey, once again hub up. Great. Good job. -Better? -Better. Scheisse! -What? -I saw someone. I didn't see anything. He was right there. A man. I'm sure I'm not alone down here. Sicko, there's no one down there but you. Just chill out. What the...? -There! -Fuck! -You see him now? -Yeah. But I don't know what I saw. I'm not sure that was a man. Maybe the light... Shadows fooled us. Shit. I'm not blind. There's something very alive down here. Sicko, the only thing alive down there is your imagination. But, just in case, be careful. Be very, very careful. Great. This looks promising. -I think you're on the right track. -Yeah. Okay. It doesn't get any higher. And no gold so far. Nothing in here. -Maybe here. -Be careful, man. Smelly! Look at this mess! No wonder we have lost war. Excuse me. I'm sorry. Sorry. Markus. Hey, how much can we get for it on ebay? Two, three hundred bucks maybe? Peanuts. Where's my gold? Did that sound like a bat to you? No... sounded like... Came from downstairs. What are you doing? It doesn't matter. I'm going after it. What? Markus, are you nuts? Maybe it's the army. I don't want to get shot again. Dude, I can't hear you. The army never found this place. There's absolutely nobody down here. -Shit! -There. You see? I'm not crazy. Hey, missus. Hey, hey. Holy shit. Boobs! Fuck! Attacking boobs! I'm running! I'm running! What the hell is that? Stay... Out! You gotta get outta there. She's gone. Find me a way out of here, fatso! All right, run! Don't stop. Just keep going, man. Don't stop. Don't stop, all right! Holy fuck! Get away from me! I will stick my imaginary foot up your ass! I'm sorry, man. How was I supposed to know? No gold, but zombies. Great! -What the...? God. -That's not fair! Don't let him bite you! Don't let him bite you! Would you please stop shouting at me? Fuck! Fuck. Perfect! Hey you, Nazi! Watch this! Nazi, watch this! Markus? Markus, are you there? Markus? Markus! I can't see you! Markus! Calm down. I'm here. Look, you've gotta see this. Zombie on a stick. God, stop it. God in heaven! You are so sick! I am sick? I am sick? You are the one who sent me up here in a fucking nest of Nazi zombies! I'm done listening to your going-up shit. I'm going down to the fucking bottom of this fucked up place. You fat fuck, fuck you! -Yeah, you. -I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'll get you outta here. I promise. I'll get you outta there. Calm down, okay? -You gotta relax. -I am relaxed. But this is really fucked up. Next time, find another Guinea pig for adventures. Come on. Fuck! Fuck! And you stop staring at me! What... What the fuck? I don't... I don't... There... It's coming from behind the door. Run! Run, Markus! No. No more running. Come on, there's more where that came from. Here, take a seat. I said, "sit down." Touch down! Yeah, you made the point. You really like this, don't you? Stop talking and start looking for a way out. You again. Markus? I'm gonna kick your ass Freeman-style. No kissing on second date, bitch. Did you find me a way out yet? I'm on it. I'm on it, okay? These maps aren't easy to read. Look, tanks. What did you expect? It is a military base. Come on, how cool is that? Fucking tanks. Good for you. In any case, we are still in the right place. Man. This is so awesome. Don't touch them. Why not? He looks angry. You touched his tank, your fault. You kidding me? Hey, bubba, you making any progress up there? Hey, you try and stay alive. I'm working on it. Yeah, take your time. I'm busy, too. Okay, sicko, I found you a way out. So, where is it? The air ventilation shafts in the main hangar. And you know the location? Sure... Sounds good. Let me just finish this. What are you... What's that good for now anyway? I wanna be the first German burning down this fucking flag. Yeah, I'm curious how you'll like it when the flames attract dozens of those zombies to your location. Let them come. God. Why? Are you done? Nope. Okay, now I'm done. What about those shafts? You have to find the main hangar. Okay, left or right? Left. Okay. What... Didn't you say the U.S. army didn't know about this place? yeah... Tell me again. No, I won't. Anyway, the main hangar should be in this area of the plant. What the hell happened down here? Give me a closer look. Didn't you tell me to be careful? Yeah... Then give me a "careful" closer look. Yeah... great. I just don't get... -What? -That is not from world war two. That's an m16 assault rifle from the '60s. It doesn't make any sense. Why? Because this base was officially shut down and sealed off in 1945. Hello, there. Come here, my little friend. Yeah. Much better than a crowbar. Forget it. It's too old. You never know. Fuck! The land of the free, the land of the brave, the land of the dead. You fucking losers. You fucking losers. Sicko! God, I'm giving up on you. Stop talking to me, you're just another voice in my head. Come on. How fucking big is this plant? About three square miles. And you sure I'm going in the right direction? If I tell you now, you're just going to blame me later. Fair enough. I think I'll take this way. Could this be where they kept the gold? I don't know. Then where is the fucking gold? Come on. There's no gold in here. It's all gone. Fuck! Wait. Hold on. Could this be... It is. We're rich! Gold! Gold! We found it! Aren't you forgetting something? Is there more? Where? Where? Here? There? I'm talking about Nazis. Zombies. Death. I'm rich. Look, you got your gold, now get out of there. Yeah, yeah, I'm going. I'm going. Okay... Do you hear that? Yeah... definitely one of my friends. There you are. Hey... You're okay? Can you believe that? This fucker tried to shoot me. Hey, there's no other way. You have to get past him. Okay. Wait... Wait, I think I got an idea. What are you gonna do? Are you insane? Can you see? I see... I see you're brain-dead. No, not that. This fucker is mimicking me. And that's good for what? I'm show you. Watch and learn... Bang! Sometimes I even amaze myself. And I'm sure they have pills for that. I'm sure I'm running in circles. This place can't be that big. No, no, trust me. This should be the right way. You said "should." Okay, you're lost. I don't feel amazed anymore. Look these maps are crap. They're too old after all, they're wrong. It's not my fault. I'm gonna guide myself now. You useless piece of shit. Okay, okay, okay. Okay, let's see. Can't be that hard. Forget it. I already did that. There's no map of the interior in this book. What? There's no map you could use in this book, Markus. Then why the fuck did you even give me this useless crap? Did you hear that? Hear what? Come on. Get a doctor. There's someone talking. Talking? Talk about who needs a doctor. There, again. It's definitely a voice. I don't know, man. Maybe it's the venting system we're looking for? Venting system? It's a fucking voice. Okay, what does it say? I don't know. Can you locate where the voice is coming from? No. Hey, a fuse box. Maybe I can get some power down here. Give it a try. Okay. -Markus. -Light. I got light! I can't believe it still works after all those years. Amazing. What the fuck is this? Holy shit. God. This is huge. What? Okay, what's next? Elvis... What was that? Bubba, please tell me you know what this is. Yeah... I know what that is. And I'm quite sure it's something you better stay away from. Looks like someone was very angry. I really wanna know what's inside. No. You don't. Hey, at least it could be valuable. Here's a handle. No! Don't touch it! Markus! Stop me, if you can. Damn it! -Fuck! -I told you, don't open it. I told you, I told you, I told you. Run! Markus, run! Aliens! Man, fucking aliens! I just peed my pants. That's awesome. Awesome, awesome. What... Markus? Markus? Daniels, secure the perimeter. Johnson, handcuff him. And let's get this motherfucker topside. Fuck! Freeze! Daniels, cover me! Fuck! No! What the fuck is it? No! Shoot it! Shoot it in the head! I can't stop him! My god! Daniels, Johnson! No! I can't feel my legs. Fuck, my head. No, no, no! No! What the hell? Can you see this? Hey! Hey! Bubba! Hey! Fuck, fuck! No, not now! Shit. Fuck. Fuck! Okay, okay, okay. Calm down. You are dead. I am fine. You are not. Weapons. I need a weapon. Okay. Yes. Come to daddy. Yeah. That's the real thing. Man, if I survive this shit, I know a fat black guy who's in big trouble. In painful trouble. I'm gonna kick you're fucking fat ass. Bloody bastard. Okay... Man. I have a bad feeling about this. Freeze! Hold it right there! Don't shoot, it's me. Not you again. -What's wrong? -It's him, the German. -Get him in here. -Come on, all right, buddy. Get over here. So you're the pain in my ass? Duke, secure him. Asshole, come on. Don't move. Listen, asswipe, my grandfather killed you Nazi fuckheads by the dozens. And I have no problem blowing your brain out of your German head! Why don't you suck my balls? Psst, hey little one! You in the big helmet. Excuse me, when are we going to leave? -You? -What? Well, shit, sorry! Ma'am... misses... Private... sir. It was an accident, okay? Easy, easy... I'm sorry for your lip, okay? I never wanted to hurt you. Hey, don't lose your head over her. She's like that with everybody. Pms, you know? It's okay, o'Neil. All right... Calm down. That's why she didn't give me a call. Say, what happened here? I had no problem killing all those zombies, how come you army guys got hammered so hard? Man, I don't know. We were attacked by something big, bigger than anything you've seen down here. We tried to give 'em cover, but shit... We didn't stand a chance. Fuck, everything happened so fast. Great. I want bubba back. You okay, dude? What do you think? I can't help you with those, buddy. I'm not in charge here. Hey, come on. We both know you're not down here for me. That's the spirit, boy. I like that. You know, it's all top secret and all but... They said we'd find this "thing" in some sort of carrying container. We got there this thing was empty. And man, the sarge was pissed. Sounds creepy. Taylor, get over here. Yes, sir. Get it off me! God damn it. Fuck, fuck! Man! Man down over here. We need a medic. We need a medic. -Shit is out of control. -Fire in the hole. Where are the other units? We have to get out of here, sir. -It's fucked. -Yes, sir. Copy that. Sir, I lost half of our unit. Request backup and permission to fall back. Hey, can I help you? Hey, hey, can I help you? No. Back off. Are you serious? Yes, sir. -Over and out. -Can't stop the bleeding. -Man... -Sir, what did command say? You step back, soldier. Ladies, we're on our own now. Okay, let's check if there's more creatures down here. I don't want any more surprises. -But we're not enough... -You hear me, soldier. Okay, let's go. Start with this area here. Make sure the hallways are clear. -Yes, sir. Move! Move! -This is suicide. Get to work and shut up. That's an order, soldier. Yes, sir. Not you, you stay with meyers. -He didn't make it. -You stay with... He's dead, sir. Fuck it. Fuckers. This shit is so fucked up. Taylor, get me that German asshole. Yes, sir. Come on, move. Listen, boy. Don't get in our way. And don't act like a fool. Then we'll all get out of here in one piece. Is that understood? No problem. I'm easy. Good. He's all yours. Hey, you better not piss him off. Stay here, keep quiet. -Fuck, shit! -Fuck, shit! Fuck! Get away from him! What the hell. Drop him! Watch out! Watch out! You okay? Yeah. Eat this, kraut. Yeah, I just can't believe this is really happening. What should we do? -Quiet. -Not sure that's gonna save us. Hey, hey, he's still alive. Man, look, he's still alive. Shit, sir! Listen to me, soldiers... Backup's not coming. You have to get outta here, now. Help's on the way. No, no, it's... Run... now, go... They don't want us alive. They... Shit. Fuck! It doesn't make any sense. No. Excuse me! What part of "run" didn't you understand? -Fucking radio. -Shut up! No. Are you fucking stupid? He said run. We have to get out of here. Echo three to echo seven, do you copy? -Hey, hey, listen! Hey! -Stay away from him. Don't touch him. Fuck! Listen, o'Neil. I know what he meant, and he was right. And nobody's coming for us. That's what I've been telling you all along. So won't you please? Look, it makes sense. We need all the help we can get. Hello... Yeah, yeah, wait, wait. I don't like this. We're gonna get outta here. We're gonna make it, buddy. Thank you. Very much appreciated. All right, grab some ammo. Let's get the hell outta here. What about me? Hey! Hello! No. No weapon for you. Okay, great. No gun. Not that I need one. I'm fine, just fine. Pfft, who needs a gun in times like these? Let's move. Watch your backs. -Get over here. -Move it. Hey! Stop pushing me, okay? Hey, quiet, don't talk anymore. Man. All clear. Moving. Clear. -Stay close. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay... Hey, o'Neil. -All clear. -All right. Hey, are we there yet? Come on. Move, move. Cleared. Shit. The main entrance must be around here somewhere. You guys really remind me of a former friend of mine, bubba. Heard of him? Great navigator. Jesus. Contact. What the fuck? Shit! Fuck, fuck! O'Neil! God, who did you eat? You smell like a bag full of shit. Are you fucking kidding me? Fucking great... Brilliant. What? He's got my weapon, you asshole. I'm very sorry for saving your life. You're welcome, but you know, that's how we handle things in Germany. Okay... And... Nothing I haven't already done. How cool! That's how we handle things in the U.S. Amateur. Awesome! Hey, hey, can I have a grenade too? Hey, come on. Just a little one, please. Hey, I promise, I'll only blow up Nazis? Somebody over there. Maybe the backup team. Sir, we have possibility of survivors... It's about fucking time. Possibility of survivors. All right, stay put. Stay quiet. Yes sir, we understand. This is lieutenant Taylor. United States army with two other survivors. Radio was cut off. Hello? This is lieutenant Taylor of the United States army. Anybody there? No, wait... No! No, Taylor! Watch out! Head down, head down. -Hey, -sir, we have two survivors. Sir? Sir? Do you copy? Do you copy? We got two survivors. Get it off, get it off me! Get it away from me! Shoot it! Come on, come on, get down. For once, listen to me. Okay. Sounds safe now. -You go first. -Great. Okay. You asked for it. No, no. Hold. Don't... don't shoot. Stop. What? Don't ask. It's complicated. You gotta be kidding me. All available units, seal the doors. Repeat, seal the doors. Hey, hey, hey! Open the door! Hey! Come on! Come on! Open the door! Hey, fuck! Fuck! Come on! I will burn you! Fuck. What the... Hey! What's wrong? Are you nuts? Okay, please tell me that this is just a military alarm clock. Shit. It's kind of a mini-nuke. In auto mode. What? Five kilotons. Enough to clean up this mess here, but not enough to cause serious trouble on the outside. It's an a-bomb. Come on. You're kidding me. They can't blow up an a-bomb. We are in Germany. Yes, they can. Quit pissing your pants. It's gonna fry us but won't damage the structure. Okay, great. You just got fucked by your own people. I guess they fucked both of us. Yeah... Is that supposed to make us partners in crime or something? Come on. Stop it. Turn it off? No way. No use in trying. Getting out isn't very likely now, is it? Fucking bastards! I'm sorry. Why? It's not your fault. We're expendable. Nobody cares. Yeah, but you wouldn't be down here without me. Okay. Now that you reminded me. It was your fault. Let's wait for the big bang. We won't feel anything so close to it. I don't like that option. Try to live with it. You mean, "die with it." Whatever. Funny how it all ends? Fantastic. -What? -My name is Markus. Debby. I was on my way to go swimming when the order came in. I could be there right now with my friends, you know? What did you say? Swimming, drinking good bavarian beer. -Swimming? -All that stuff. Schwimmen? I know a way out! What? Where? -Downstairs. -You're kidding me, right? Do I look like I'm kidding? Come on, soldier. Let's go. They told us all the passages through here are blocked or something. I'm not talking about the passages. How do you think I got in here? You've got to trust me, Debby. Okay. Lead the way, big boy. Okay. No problem. We can make it in time. And find the way easy. Are you okay? Don't ask. By the way, did I tell you that I love women in uniform? When this is over, I'II Chuck it in. Behind you! Okay. Eat this, Nazi shitbag! And this! And this! It's die-day. -You okay? -Don't I look okay? Just watch your back next time, okay? Yeah, right. You sure we're heading the right way? Sure as hell. There, left. Clear. God damn. Not Paul. -You knew him? -Yeah. Poor bastard. What...! Markus! Markus! Help! Get away from me. Women. Leave them alone for two seconds and... Okay, hold on, Debby, I'm coming. Contact! Now get to the chopper. You okay? You look okay. You can thank me later. Let's go. Markus! What the...? Let go of... let go of my head! Come on, now! What a dumbass. Does this mean I get your phone number? No. Okay. But you know this? It's a once in a lifetime opportunity. Which way now? Left. I really hope the exit is there. I'm starting to get used to you. That's my legendary charisma, you know. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. This looks familiar to me. Yeah. Hey, there. The door. We're almost there. The good thing is, I didn't come across any zombies down here -when I came in. -Let's hope so. We're running out of ammo. Hey, trust me. Hold this! Hold this! Shit! Give me your grenade. Give me your grenade. Shit! Go! Go, go, go, go! Hey. Man, that was pretty close. Yeah, it ain't that easy. What the hell...? No, no, no, no! Watch... watch it! Fuck you! What? Never mind. You know, that was our way out. Fuck! Don't you know another way? No, that's the only one. Shit! Wait, wait, wait. I got an idea. Step back. Watch and learn, soldier. Man, I'm good. -Poser. -Come on. Don't you girls like smart men? Yeah. -Wait. -What's wrong? Wrong place, in the wrong time, pal? You think? Okay. Looks like everything's clear in here. Look for some stairs down. That's the way. Sure. Almost there. Fuck. What? Not... Not again. Run! Run! Go on, run! Run, Debby! Debby, back! There's more. Run, down, down! Debby, run! Run, they're coming! Come on, Debby. Where's your fucking exit? -I'm running out of ammo. -We're close. You said that a minute ago. Fuck! There are too many of them. What? Why don't they attack? Batteries not included? Heil Hitler! No. Fuck it. -He's mine. -Okay. Fuck! Man. Against. Man. Mein. Fhrer! Not fair. Markus! Fuck! Eat this! Debby! No! No! Fuck! Get back here, come on! Come on, you pussy. Come on. You scared? You scared, you little shit? You suck! Drop dead. That's it! That's it! Now I'm really pissed. Yes. Come on, drop dead. Okay. You want me to go Chuck Norris on you? Get back here, you coward. Come on, you coward. Fuck it. Come on, let's go. Come on. Debby? Debby? Hey. Where is he? I'm planning his downfall. Forget him. Move. I almost got him. Come on. This way. Okay. Now listen, Debby. You have to dive as long as you can. -Just don't stop. -What? Debby, you have to go now. Forget it. The bomb will blow up any second. I'm not going to leave you. Watch out. -Call me. -No! Okay, Adolf, you filthy pig. Looks... Like... You Lost again, mein fhrer! Okay, blondie, come on. Come to daddy. Crap. Markus? Markus, come on, man. Come on. You all right? We made it, man. We made it. Step back, soldier. We're here to handle it. I got him. We're good to go. Package ready to be delivered. We're moving out now. Choppers, are you ready for takeoff? What the...? -Doctor, he's awake. -Here. Hold this. What about that fat guy in the car? On the run. He left the car empty. They're searching the area. It's only a matter of time till they find him. I want him contained as soon as possible. Yes, sir. And he had this on him. What's her condition? She's gonna be fine. -Leave us. -Yes, sir. Garbage. You know, history is not written in ink. It's written in blood. I'm going to ask you once. The name of the location of your collaborator? Come closer. Closer. Closer. Last chance. Where is your collaborator? I'm telling you once. Fuck you. And fuck your fucking army. Your choice. No. No! You killed him! No. I authorized myself to execute him. And you. What the fuck? He was recording everything, you morons! Find that fat fuck and bring me those tapes. Yes, sir. Move, move, move, move, move! Fuck! Okay, you can start with the other one. What the hell is this? What are you talking about? "Made in Germany." Crazy. Come on, give it to me. Let's see. Looks like a camera. Say "cheese." You're on can... Shit! What... what? Adolf was fucking blind. Hey, look at the lens, man. Why are you here again? Because I'm a believer. The only person on this planet still listening to you. Hey, and because of your hot sister. Hey, are you sure you got this right? I mean, I can't read shit here, and I am German. Sure, I'm sure. I've been studying it for months. The reichsgold is closer than ever. Cool. And what about those secret weapons, neu schwabenland, aliens, ufos? Bullshit. Nothing but myths. Constructed to deflect the truth about the gold. Yeah, but the website says it's true. I mean, what if it is true? It isn't. None of it. Whatever is hidden in these caves, I'll find it. Sicko. Hey, bubba, when is this suit ready? I need action. Two weeks at least. Two more weeks? Come on. The suit and the camera are prototypes. It takes time, okay? All right. They why don't you stop eating and start working, bubba? Or is it already bubba fat? -Let me explain... -Hey, tell them about your father. What? Tell them about your father, the army, the coverup. -All the cool stuff. -Man. Can you just shut the fuck up? And tell them about your hot sister. Hey, leave my sister out of this. Good. This book is the diary of Jacob Stein. He's a Jewish prisoner with the dachau working the messerschmitt caves in oberammergau. Wait. That's important. I have to capture that. What... What're you doing? Close ups, details... What any good director would do... No, no, no. Hold on a sec. You're not the director. I am. Listen, you're the cameraman, and therefore, you got nothing to say. Okay? Got it? Got it. But this diary is important. Its old. It tells a secret. It's the key to tons of gold. We have to show it, okay? Boobies. Cool. But are you sure this diary is legit? No. I got it on ebay. Of course it is. Hey fatso, what if there's still some secret old Nazi stuff down there, or... or even better, an old community just like those weird Nazis from the moon? Just saying... Okay, I m recording. Okay, great. Now, this is the outer fence. Beyond it, it's all military and restricted and shit. But im working on a way to get you in. Then we II get you to the upper dam. Upper dam. Got it. And if Stein's diary is correct, you II find the secret entrance to the Nazi base there. Yeah! And tons of Nazi-gold. We're gonna be rich, man, fucking rich! They are now entering the tunnel system that was part of the messerschmitt caves. They used the tunnels as storage sites -for the airplane parts. -Okay, cool. And I have to admit they were smart. Real smart. They drove fully loaded trucks into the tunnels. And on the other side they drove out -with empty ones. -Okay. That's how they fooled the allied air surveillance for years. Okay, and they did the same with all the gold? Yes, I think so. Officially the gold was to be transported to Hitler's eagle's nest in the alps. But it was never found. Thomas, its cold and it's wet. -I can t see shit... -We're here, okay? This is the only publicly accessible part of the caves. And here... Wanna know what's on the other side? The gold? Right behind this rock are tons and tons of Nazi gold waiting to be found! -That s the idea. -Shit, man. Great. Take the cam, bubba. Okay. Give me that. Right. Hey, why can't we just blow up this wall? Why... why... Why go all the way around? That's a much easier way to get in. Forget it. The army would be here in no time. And by the way, I'm not a terrorist. I don t have a shitload of dynamite in my basement. Come on, let s go. There s more to see outside. Are you sure it's a smart idea to sneak in a U.S. army base in the middle of the night? Do you see any guards? No, not yet. I cant see a thing. Let me switch on the cam-light. No, the guards would see it. You said there weren't any guards. Over there, no. Over here, yes. I did my research. I've been here with my dad a thousand times. Fuck! Guards! Run! I'm running! Shit. Look, I'm running. The car, get in the car! Run, run, run! Shit! You... You fucking asshole! You goddamn... I just wanted to get you a little workout. Not funny. |
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