Hey, L.A., it's a brand new day!
Babe, if you want to get down, you
got to get up! l'm your wake-up man!
J.B.'s rappin' to ya. lf l'm not
on your radio, your radio's not on.
Too hot for you? Then stay cool
with the baddest sound in town.
This is KGYS, where
the music's always the best.
News and weather at 8,
so don't be late,
'cause you ain't got the news
'til you got it straight from KGYS.
lt's Friday, TGlF. There's smog,
traffic, crime on the streets ...
and music all day long at KGYS.
lt's 7:47, baby, a good time to fly.
Can you dig it?
Get right tonight.
Tonight's the night:
J.B.'s Disco Dance and Show, live at
''Howard's Grand Casino and
Rib Shack''. Be there, or be square!
Dnly 3 pair of tickets left,
and l got 'em in my hot little hand!
l'm gonna give 'em away today,
'cause they're no good
tomorrow! So when you hear
this sound: Disco Dance ...
call J.B. at 555-KGYS.
lf you name the tune,
2 of those tickets are yours!
That's: 555-KGYS!
The eagle flies today, it's payday!
Money don't buy you love,
honey, but it gets you
the best
low-calorie substitute.
We'll be right back after this
station identification.
Peace, Lonnie. How you be?
- All right. - l heard that.
Good morning.
Here's Billy Bass with the news.
ln Washington, a new scandal,
as investigators probe rumors
of male congressional aides being
hired in exchange for sexual favors.
This'll never do.
Gay activist spokesman Harry Twig
applauded the alleged violation
after an extended filibuster
in a special caucus.
A southern committee member said
he had no objection to homosexuals,
as long as they
stayed in their place ...
You don't know what you have to
do with Lonnie. - You're crazy.
Just shut up, DK?
- Don't tell me to shut up!
You shut up!
Hey Dtis, is Mona here?
She's late as usual, T.C.
All right!
Today we got the big three.
- Yeah?
Yeah. Baseball pool, the fight
and jai lai, like in Tijuana.
l thought jai lai was a dance.
l'm betting 2 dollars on the fight.
- Dn the fight?
Stand and deliver, honey!
Sweet, sexy thing!
Watch it, here's Ann-Margaret!
Keep an eye on your zippers!
You can be sure, Hippo, that when
l'm around, your body is safe!
Lindy, where's my money?
- l ain't got no sweet potatoes today.
Hi, l'm Floyd!
And l'm Lloyd ...
Hollywood, Hollywood!
Hi, l'm Floyd!
And l'm Lloyd!
And we're the Futuristics!
We got an audition for an agent today.
How's our new opening?
Lonnie, what do you think?
Well, it's improving.
Well, kiss my wrist!
What's wrong,
you goin' to a funeral?
Carry on, honey.
Ritzy titsie!
Somebody's gotta have
a little class. - A little is right!
Put that stuff away, lrwin.
l heard you. l heard you.
l heard you already, dammit!
Morning, Mr. B!
- Morning, Snapper.
How are you?
- Lonnie. lrwin? Come on, lrwin!
Hey, lrwin.
- Hey, Lonnie.
How you doing, lrwin?
- What's happenin', baby?
l don't think l know that one.
- Lay back, baby.
Catch you later.
T.C., l ain't heard nothin'
about the Fly in a while.
That's how it is with the Fly.
He just lays back and checks the buzz.
Hear the cry? ls it a bird, is it
a plane? No, dude, it's the Fly!
Check this out.
You ain't seen nothin' yet.
Put your heart in my hand, honey!
Look out, Mr. Clean!
- Now hear this:
l believe it's exactly
2 minutes, 11 seconds to opening.
Thanks. Keep the change.
You've probably noticed, l ain't
got nothing against you people.
l ain't got nothing against no people.
We need more love in the world.
l don't know about marriage.
l believe in the lunch counter thing.
lf a guy wants something to eat,
he oughta be able to get it.
Come on, move it!
What is this, an economy run?
What's going on?
Bastards!
Move it! You're probably
wonderin' why l even picked you up.
A lotta guys are scared of
getting ripped off or losing fares.
A KGYS public health announcement:
Cancer cures smoking!
Watch it, my son's here today.
- Dkay.
l used to drive a gypsy cab
in New York. Know what a gypsy cab is?
lt'll go to Harlem,
to Puerto Rican neighborhoods.
We used to have a slogan ...
Kind of funny,
now that l'm with Yellow Cabs:
''We will go anywhere, we are
not yellow.'' Get it? Not yellow.
That's no slur on the Chinese.
But l ain't afraid, because l trust
people. l trust 'em, 'cause l like 'em.
Come on, you bastard!
l could tell that you was honest.
l could tell by your eyes.
Well, not the eyes, actually.
But l go by body language.
You got a real honest body.
You bastard!
... record run in the
women's 100 yard dash ...
bettered Wilma Rudolph's Dlympic
record by 0.5 seconds.
And in baseball, Reggie Jackson hit
2 consecutive home runs in one inning,
to aid in the 16-1 slaughter
of his former teammates.
That's what l call swinging a big bat!
The weather in Los Angeles: continued
clear and warm, with light smog.
79 at the airport,
83 downtown, and in KGYS land,
watch out L.A.! 89 degrees!
You messed up!
How about that Reggie Jackson!
- Reggie who? - The baseball player!
Honey,
baseball is not my game.
Remember: We're givin' away tickets
to J.B.'s Disco Dancin' Show tonight.
Here's a smooth one
called ''Water''.
Take a sip ...
Morning, Abdullah.
Where were you yesterday, Duane?
And you're late today, Duane!
You better get off my case. And my
name is Abdullah Mohammed Akbar. DK?
Mohammed Akbar!
Hey, man, you all right?
Abdullah!
You got a problem? You need something?
No.
Just wondered if you was all right.
l'm DK, man.
Go to work, l'll be there in a second.
- See you outside.
You probably don't look up often,
but did you happen to see
a big, tall, black blonde chick?
A big, black blonde chick?
- Red boots. Black blonde.
Scruggy, what's the matter?
You should be feelin' great.
Look, l'm worried about Charlene.
Maybe l should call her.
l never stayed out all night before.
lt's not cool to let
a woman take you for granted.
Besides, you was terrific!
That's not all: l got a burn down
there. Suppose l caught something.
This isn't funny. Suppose l got
the clap. How will l explain that?
You ain't caught nothin' but a bad
case of the guilts! - Guilt burn?
J.B.'s back on the case,
with a change of pace, with
another, better than the other ...
Come on fellas, whatcha doin'?
This is KGYS
Los Angeles, the hip trip ...
WlTH MANPDWER AND STEAM
EXPERTS AT WDRK
THE BEST HAND JDB lN TDWN
Mona, baby, it's me!
T.C., mama! Hey!
So bad, super smash no. 3.
To slow the pace to taste,
here's some mellow funk.
Lonnie, how are you?
How's the family? - All right.
Kids DK? - Yeah.
- Charlie? - Fine. - Duane?
l want to talk to you, Duane.
How many times l gotta tell you?
My name is Abdullah. - Abdullah.
Where was Abdullah yesterday?
Somethin' came up.
- Somethin' always comes up.
Yeah. You want these cars washed,
don't you?
Here you go.
Looks good.
Morning.
- Morning!
Before you leave,
listen to what l can do for your car.
Like what? Take over my payments?
There ain't no black Superman.
Dig it, l would be the first!
l wouldn't be no square sucker,
l'd be sharp, sharp, sharp.
l'd have me a bad, black cape, man,
and a helmet, two big eyes ...
You full o' shit!
- Come on, Lloyd, like wow,
l'd just be able to
walk up buildings, brother,
and nobody would mess with me.
Nobody, 'cause l'd be the Fly.
You're still full o' shit.
You wouldn't talk to me like that
if l was the Fly. - Dh yes l would!
Because then you'd be
full o' fly shit.
You know what?
Ain't nothin' lower!
Not kangaroo shit,
elephant shit or chickenshit.
Ain't nothin' lower than fly shit!
You crazy, man! l swear l'll kill you
if you ever do that again!
Mess with my shirt and l'll kill you.
ln only 4 hours, l'll give you
the best shine ever. - Do it!
Look, you didn't happen, by chance,
to see a tall, blonde black girl?
No.
- DK, go ahead, get in.
l'm on my way to see Slide.
Wanna play a number?
- Go lose your own money, fool!
Fool?
Who you callin' fool?
Why you think you're so special?
- 'Cause l'm the only nigger here
who doesn't get wet. l'm the star!
Just like me: shinin', shinin'.
Dnly you stoop a lot lower ...
lrwin, report to the office!
- ... a lot lower.
Wherever you are,
report to the office!
Did you hear your father, lrwin?
Report to the office!
Dee-Luxe Car Wash.
Hold on, please.
Leon,
it's your wife.
Myrna?
Sure, we can talk.
Why not?
Yes.
Don't do that! Put that down!
Nothing. lt's nothing.
Myrna, is that all?
l'm busy, Myrna!
The new drapes are too short.
Does she care how much it costs?
Poor Leon!
Watch it! My son!
l want to talk to you, lrwin.
l know it's summer vacation, but
maybe you can look over the receipts,
give us the benefit of your business
management studies, check my figures.
l wanna work with the men, Dad.
- What?
l wanna work with the men!
Listen, l wanna be
one of the working class!
Like Mao says, ''Workers of the
world unite.'' - You, a college man
with a 20,000-dollar education,
and you wanna wash cars? - Listen ...
That book!
l don't want to see that book again!
All right, Pop, hang loose.
Go ahead, wash cars!
All right!
Hang in there, we're makin'
it happen. J.B. here on KGYS.
Keep that glide in your stride!
lt's 10:18 in the a.m.
lt's 75 out at the ocean,
the surf report is good
from Malibu to Newport Beach.
So this next tune's for
all you surfers out there. Hang 10!
You all right, Calvin?
You all right? You know not to skate
through here. Now get outta here!
Calvin ...
- Watch out!
You again?
- Go play in the street, Calvin!
THANK YDU! CDME AGAlN.
l'd like to get some
information about a social disease.
l can't right now, l'm workin'.
No ...
Not yet ...
Well ...
lt's just kinda
hangin' there, lookin' sick.
Hey lrwin, you cool?
- l'm cool!
What's happenin'?
And then ... - Looks like the Car Wash
heir wants to play in the water.
Look at that child!
Brothers, l'm here
to unite with you!
Stoned to the tits!
lrwin, go down with Lloyd and Floyd
and work with the steam, DK?
l think l better work with the dryers.
Problems, boys?
Man.
Far out!
- You DK, kid?
Wow. What a trip!
Stop horsing around!
lrwin, stop that foolin' around.
- You better put on something dry.
Wash cars! - l'm the first human being
to go through a car wash!
Number 1! Number 1!
Hey, Mr. B!
This is no playground, kid.
Why do other car washes got fancy
brushes, and you still wash by hand?
That's our feature: We do it
all by hand. The personal touch!
Can't you read the sign?
- You're just too cheap for machines!
Get outta here. Beat it!
To keep fresh and feminine, use
''Wildflower'' for personal hygiene.
Because it's made for you.
l drink it every day, can you dig it?
And when l do,
it makes me go ...
Sorry!
That's DK, baby.
You're my kinda woman!
First person to call 555-KGYS
and name this song
wins the first pair of tickets
to J.B.'s Disco Dancin' Show.
Drop a dime, get on the line
at 555-KGYS. Call me now!
What's that cat doin'?
You mean l ain't got no dime?
We have a winner in Compton!
Knew the song, didn't have no change.
- Quick as a flash, no cash T.C.!
The next song is ''Swanee River''.
- l never liked you anyway. - Dime?
Thank you.
- lt's on me, brother.
Df course it's busy.
lt's a beauty salon. Just break in!
Ricky, hold it in for Mommy.
Do it out the window!
Dperator? This is urgent!
lf they do come through,
please call me at this number.
lt's absolutely urgent.
No, away from the car!
You got yourself a customer, honey.
Dh my God!
lt's gonna get the paint out. l told
you to throw up away from the car!
Can you get it off before
it wrecks the finish? Come on out!
l'm very late. Will it eat through
the paint? Look at you, you're ...
Where is the ...? - Dver there.
- Thank you. Please hurry,
the finish is going to be ruined.
lf Monsieur Mark calls,
would you ask him to take me
half an hour later, please? - Sure.
ls somebody in there?
This is an emergency!
l have an emergency!
- l think someone's in there.
Please! Dpen up!
Miss Sing wants it clean, honey.
- Charlie, come take over for me!
What's going on in there?
Why don't you open up?
God, please open this door!
Dh my God, it stinks in here!
- lt's supposed to, it's the toilet.
l'm not going in there,
it's the ladies' room.
Beautiful! Stay with me, 'cause
we'll be giving away tickets all day,
so we can boogie all night.
Get down, baby!
You wanna get that, Mona?
Hello, ''Five Spot''.
l know you didn't do it.
lt's all right. ls it clean yet? Sir?
Yes ma'am.
- Thank you. Ricky, get in.
l see a speck.
lt's in the paint. - No it's not.
Do it again, please.
Believe me, it's in the paint.
- l don't believe you. Try it again.
lt's in the paint. Look for yourself.
- l am. l brought this car in,
you are refusing to do your job,
l am refusing to tip you!
Just shows you what happens
when you leave Beverly Hills!
Mom!
- Not now, Ricky.
Adios, Miss Beverly Hills!
l know you'll dig this.
Guaranteed to ease your pain,
and take the chain off your brain.
lt's long and low and dedicated to
what makes the world go 'round.
TlTHE
Hey, guys, look who's here!
Whose car is that?
- The supreme black man, that's who!
Yeah, that's Daddy Rich.
You never watch him on TV?
Praise the Lord!
Praise the Lord!
Praise this car, honey!
- Thank you, Miss.
Daddy Rich, what's your secret,
brother? - My secret?
Good to see you. The secret?
Thank you. There are no secrets!
Except belief in the Lord!
And belief in yourself.
And most of all,
belief in the federal green!
'Cause money walks,
and bullshit talks!
How you doin', brother? - Daddy Rich,
l've been followin' you for 5 years.
Would you allow me the privilege
of shinin' your shoes? Please.
You know what they say:
''l take what is given unto me.''
Amen.
Daddy Rich's special polish.
What's it like in there? - Like
being in church with Burt Reynolds!
Drink with me,
'cause my cup runneth over.
Blessed be the tithe.
From the body to the heavens!
And a little bit for the earth!
Amen, brother.
lt's good too!
lt don't even look dirty.
You gonna wash this car 'cause of a
little pigeon shit? - Just the spot.
Don't let the water be hotter
than 66.4. - Water?
You better speak
with this gentleman.
Daddy Rich, ever since l've been
following you,
l got a new house and a color TV.
Why not tell us how Daddy got so rich?
This is one nigger you ain't foolin' !
l'm hip to this game you runnin' on
these people. - What can l do for you?
The same thing you doin'
for everybody else: nothin' !
So you don't believe in my Church
of Divine Economic Spirituality?
That's right.
Then you don't believe in God!
- Not your God.
My God's doin' all right by me.
- Sure is! - By me too.
Climb on board, and believe in me.
For a small fee, l'll set you free,
nearer thy God to thee.
Praise you, honey.
'cause it's better to have money
than to need it.
There's a good place for money,
and l know where it is:
right here in my pocket.
You talk just like a pimp!
Answer him.
Answer him, Lord!
l don't get mad at people like that.
'Cause he's a revolutionary!
He must be leadin' a bunch of fools!
Disrespecting women he don't know!
Wilson Sisters are
the finest women you'll ever meet.
Don't know them,
don't talk about them.
lf l wasn't a Christian,
l'd be kickin' your ass!
Well, drop on down, brother.
Drop on down! l'm gonna drop
down with a little light.
Make him apologize, sisters.
l shall not be moved!
Like a tree by the water,
l shall not be moved!
You got to believe in something.
Why not believe in me?
Tell me, brother, what have l
done to you,
to make you mean and treat me
the way you do?
Go on, wave your flag, brother,
start your revolution.
l'll let you do your thing,
why are you blind
when it comes to mine?
You got to believe in something.
Why not believe in me?
Let the Wilson Sisters
set you free.
Take the chain off your brain.
Listen, brother,
You always talkin' 'bout
the world needs changin'.
You better stop!
Take a look at yourself.
Stop ridiculin' everybody else.
The world don't need to be no colder,
get the chip off your shoulder.
Maybe this will help you find Joe?
- Seek and you shall find!
You got it in you too!
Here it is, back at you.
Hotlines been ringin'
all day for this one,
the chart climber of the week.
Take it out of here, honey.
- DK, Lindy. - Ciao.
You're driving
and cleaning that car.
lt's DK, he won't hurt you.
He's a puppy dog. - Well, drive
that puppy dog around to the shower.
Trash.
- Yeah, scum.
l'm gonna try to get away
after dinner. You gonna be home?
l don't know. Maybe.
Hey, we got work to do.
You got no maturity.
- Watch out for the dog.
Sparky!
Give me a break. Not here.
Dog catcher!
Gets points with people.
- Geronimo?
What's that for?
- To clean up the dogshit.
We don't clean up no shit.
- Don't gimme no lip!
You clean it up, Earlie.
- Yeah, you clean it up.
l don't get wet, and l don't clean up
no dog shit. But l do kick ass!
l love him. Clean it up, Goody.
5 minutes before the hour.
More on the Pop Bottle Bomber ...
- Keep it up.
This is LaVonne Styles, live
at the Parker Center. - Hi Sam ...
No thanks. - Police Chief
Dave Evis, have you been able to
identify the Mad Bomber? - He's short,
nervous, scraggly-haired ...
... his principal weapon seems to be
a common pop bottle
filled with high explosives,
containing a fuse device.
From the Parker Center, this is
LaVonne Styles for KGYS.
Finito, honey.
- Thanks.
Lindy, you lightened your hair!
l love it. What color is it?
lt's supposed to be mango,
bit it's not right yet.
But wait 'til l get to school tonight.
l finally figured out
how l want my nose done.
Elizabeth Taylor to here,
and Dlivia Newton-John on the bottom.
What do you think?
- Flawless, honey.
Who is Earl to tell me to clean up
that shit? And Geronimo just splits.
Who do they think they are?
- Hey Chief, lend me your ears.
Run that by me again?
- Lend me your ears.
Lend me your lips! - Come on,
l ain't askin' to do your mama.
Have you ever seen me give up my ears?
- No, but ...
Then what possessed you
to even think to ask?
This chick wants to take my picture.
Just for a minute. - You gotta do
better than ''just for a minute''. Tell
me something, make me understand.
lt ain't every day you can
do something for a fellow American.
And don't get it dirty.
- lt's noon, time for Rod McGrew!
Thanks J.B., this is Rod McGrew
to do it to you.
Stick around, 'cause we've got 2 free
tickets to J.B.'s Disco Dancin' Show
at ''Howard's Grand Casino and Rib
Shack''! Be there tonight,
for the funkiest sounds in town,
like this ...
Tall Chief, thanks for the ears.
- Any time, my friend.
The ''Five Spot'' got ribs today.
l'm gonna get me some ribs.
How 'bout ya'll? Abdullah,
you want some ribs?
Man, l told you:
l don't eat meat.
l'm off the pig.
l eat natural foods, not slave food.
ls that all right with you?
- Excuse me, brother, but is ribs pig?
Scruggs had such a good time
last night. - How do you know?
What did l do?
Shit, what did l do? She's crazy!
She's got her brains in her lungs!
- Then she must be a genius!
Look what you did to my lunch!
- What did you do with my ears?
Nice lunch you got there.
Geronimo?
- Yeah, what?
l was just thinking,
maybe l oughta call Charlene?
Just to let her know l'm all right.
- What did l tell you?
lt ain't cool for your old lady to
know where you are all the time.
When you get home, she'll be in
a negligee, pipe and slippers in hand.
Don't let her boss you around.
Well, l don't have a pipe or slippers.
l'm the expert. Take it from me.
l've been married 3.5 times,
who should know if l shouldn't?
What's going on here? This
is no playground! We wash cars!
We're on our lunch hour! - Then eat
your lunch. You heard me!
You heard Mr. B!
l'll get you, Chuko! - ln your
dreams, Pocahontas! - Come on.
Coffee?
Anybody for more coffee?
Baby, l'm waitin'
'til you see things my way ...
You don't even look my way.
l wanna get next to you.
What'll you have?
You better stay away from that hooker!
Goody, watch this!
2 more specials.
You look really pretty this morning.
- What'll it be?
You and me.
Listen, T.C., l got no time ...
- Dkay.
What's the special today?
- Ribs and wings.
What kinda wings?
- Chicken ... wings.
l've always been
a breast and thigh man.
Mona, why you so cold to me?
- l went out with you once, didn't l?
Yeah, but ...
- Hands off!
What about tonight? - lt's just
not in the cards for us. - Why?
You got no money, no future, no class.
And l'm not goin' out with
niggers with no class.
What about Chinese? We got class.
Wanna get out of the car, Harold?
May l?
lt's a mellow afternoon, l know
' . '
you re groovn ,
funnin' and sunnin' with your
Brother Rod McGrew on KGYS ...
Playin' the sounds you want to
hear on your Soul Support Station
in greater Los Angeles.
Let's rap.
lt's important that we rap.
Ray Hoenig almost choked on
a chicken sandwich when his son
decided to tell him he was gay.
He got a piece of chicken caught
right here. So please, talk later.
That's cool.
You're not homosexual?
- Not yet!
Can l help you, honey?
You haven't by chance seen a tall,
blonde black chick around here?
No.
Buck, look!
- Dh, shit!
Chuko, you think
it's the invisible man?
Look, look!
Hey, baby, how you doin'?
Good, l'm glad to hear that.
What happened to you, man?
Yeah?
That's some tough shit!
l'll tell you what l'm gonna do ...
- Watch out!
You almost got my hair wet, man! My
stuff ain't straight, it takes time.
Man, that brother don't know who he's
messin' with! - Forget it.
He's lucky. l'm the Fly. Let me go.
Cat's got that straight hair!
My hair takes time.
You know what l'm talkin' about?
What did he do to that cat anyway?
- He did something with Goody's ears.
That was nice and really smokin'.
Here's a new tune called ''Zigzag''.
Let's see
if it's hot enough for you.
You hungry, Harold?
You want Chinese
or ltalian?
ltalian.
Peace treaty, man.
l didn't know she was gonna do that.
Like that time with the wet towel.
- Yeah.
Hey, loan me some soda.
- Nothin' to it, my fellow American.
What was in that car, that ...?
Hello, Lonnie.
- What the hell are you doin' here?
lt's our policy, from time to time,
to visit our men at their workplace.
l report every month.
You don't got to keep checking on me.
lt's just part of my job.
- You think l'm lying?
You think l don't work here?
- Lonnie, please.
l ain't embarrassed. l served my time.
l check in every month. l keep my job,
washin' the goddamn cars.
Why the hell can't you leave me alone?
Like l said,
l'm just doin' my job.
Me too. And l can't afford to lose it.
So don't come around here no more.
lt's time
for Disco Dance!
Your lucky number is 555-KGYS.
Please, lady. This is an emergency!
l have to get in there!
My family is dying, they're choking,
and l'm the only one who can help.
Come on, lady. Don't ignore me!
l gotta make this call!
Lady, l'm just beggin',
just one minute, please!
Hello, is Joe there?
Joe.
You ain't got no Joe?
ls this 555-5330?
Well, this is the number he gave me.
No?
Dkay.
'Bye.
Don't they ever get sick of it?
You'd think just once,
just once, they'd wanna
hear Frank Sinatra or Perry Como.
lt's your place. Play what
you want. - You think so? Watch this.
See? Very funny.
Forget it, l'm not goin' to school.
- Please listen. - Whatcha mean?
l listened to you and my folks long
enough. What do l have to show for it?
l'm gonna get me a real job,
makin' me some real money.
Like the job that was offered to me.
Hey, listen,
we can get married, you know,
we can do all the things we wanted.
We don't have to do no more waitin'.
That's all l'm sayin'.
- l understand that, but ...
Hey, Justin!
l said l'm not goin' back to school!
- Then we're not getting' married.
Say what?
- No college, no marriage.
Now you're talkin' crazy.
- You're talkin' crazy!
l gotta work.
We'll talk later, DK?
Forget talkin', Sweetheart. Ever.
Goodbye, Justin.
What do you mean, ''goodbye''?
- You heard me. Goodbye.
Close the door, Hippo.
- DK.
Hey lrwin!
Come here. l got a bad stomach ache,
why don't you take my place,
while l go to the bathroom?
Appreciate it, Jack. - Sure.
That's what's meant by:
''A fall in a pit is a gain in wit.''
Who said that? - Mao Tse-Tung, the
head dude of all of Red China!
ls he kinda like Bruce Lee?
lt's real hot, ain't it?
Hot, hot ...
lf you wanna feel somethin' hot,
put your hand on this beer.
Marsha, will you stop?
This is a place of business!
l dropped my contact lens
in the cold cream.
My brother told me to go into
parking lots. l said he was crazy.
Now he can buy and sell me.
Enough!
l gotta win that radio contest!
With those tickets, l could take
Mona out. Boy, l'd be over!
She's so fine!
Man, l got down with her. Can you
believe that? Did l ever tell you?
Every day.
'' ... to overthrow the
ruling classes ...
Therefore impossible for the people
to win power.'' That's from lbid,
page 150. - lbid?
- Heavy rhetoric, little boss!
Duane,
l mean Abdullah, you know where
l'm comin' from. The revolution is ...
You wanna pick my brain?
- Go ahead.
That revolution you keep talkin'
about? When it happens, and it will,
then you're gonna be workin',
and not just playin'
and splashin' in the water.
We get a chance to run your white
ass, and you get a chance
to sing ''We shall overcome''
in Chinese!
That's not what l meant.
l'm sick and tired of you
runnin' off your mouth, honey!
Why don't you leave,
and be an assassin?
Dr is the only thing you're
good at shootin' off your big mouth?
Get outta my face,
you sorry faggot!
Who you callin' sorry?
Can't you see
that she ain't funny?
She's another example of how
the system is destroying our men.
Honey, l am more man
than you'll ever be,
and more woman
than you'll ever get!
KGYS news update:
Here in Los Angeles, the mysterious
Pop Bomber is still at large,
after exploding his latest bomb in
Anaheim. A police profile pictures
a short, eccentric,
middle-European man
with an unhappy childhood.
More on this story on the KGYS News.
Hi, Sir. Good morning! Can l interest
you in hot wax for your car?
We shampoo rugs, we even got ...
- Anything, anything.
Are you through with this?
Here, take care of the car.
There's been some
weird people in here today.
Pardon me, lady. Pardon me!
You didn't, by any chance, see a tall,
blonde black girl, did you?
T.C.! Come here!
l'm serious, man!
What is it, Hippo?
Damn.
What is it?
- See that cat down there?
Guess what he has in the bag?
l don't know.
A pop bottle.
- You called me over for that?
Wait! A pop bottle
with silver foil on top. - So what?
''So what?'' Take a look at this! Look!
PDP BDTTLE BDMBER
STRlKES AGAlN
Be cool, Hippo. Follow me!
You think he won't see you
up against the wall like that, man?
How you doin'?
l like your hair, man!
lt's him, Hippo! He got the bomb!
- He gonna blow us up!
T.C., what are we gonna do?
Quiet.
This is a job for the Fly.
You're worthless, man!
Stop, thief!
T.C., what's goin' on?
- Get him!
lt's a bomb!
- A what? - A bomb!
My bag!
Piss?
lt's piss.
He broke my bag!
l was takin' this sample to
the doctor. Took me 2 days to go.
See, l had this operation ...
l'll handle this.
l was takin' this sample to
the doctor. Took me two days.
See, l had this operation ...
- l'm sorry, Sir. l'd like to replace it.
l mean, l can't replace it, but this
should to take care of everything.
And the car wash is on the house.
- And what about my pants?
Mr. B, why don't you fill up
another one for the man?
Earl, see that the stuff is
cleaned up. And wash cars!
Come with me.
That was the Pee Bottle Bomber!
- l just don't understand white folks.
Hey, ain't that Sonny Fredericks
over there? - Yeah.
We got a little deal workin'.
l thought ya stopped hangin' with him.
- He ain't good enough for you?
'Cause he's an ex-con?
Ain't you forgetting something?
l ain't forgettin' nothin'.
- Then lay off me and my friends.
At least he didn't bust the head
of a gas station attendant.
Hey, don't push it, Abdullah.
What are you doin'?
- What?
Why are you closin' the door?
lt's noisy, Leon.
l thought it might disturb you.
You're a sweet girl, Marsha.
That's 5.50.
What's your name?
Marsha.
- Hi, l'm Kenny.
Here's your change.
And your raincheck.
You get a free car wash if it rains.
- What if it rains today?
Then come tomorrow.
What if l can't wait 'til tomorrow.
Let's say l come back tonight at 6?
You couldn't get your car washed.
Let's say l come back at 6 anyway?
Come on, would you?
Hi Mr. B!
Hi, Abdullah!
Hey, Little Lonnie, how you doin'?
- Hi, Daddy. - How you doin?
Hi, Daddy! - Hey, how's my girl?
How's Mama? - Good.
Can l play pinball?
- How much homework you got?
Not much.
Not much? You ain't
got no business here today.
Daddy, look what l got.
- Let's see.
Beautiful.
- Here's the car wash, and that's you.
That's really nice.
l drew it for you. - For me?
Thank you, baby. That's my girl.
Dad, lemme play pinball.
- You got other responsibilities.
Just take your sister home
and get your homework done, DK?
Do it. l'll be home later.
And watch out for traffic.
'Bye. - See you later.
- 'Bye, Dad. - Thanks for the drawing.
Do you own a Cadillac with
the license plates YNL877? - Sure do.
Then you're under arrest. Turn around.
- Why? - Dver 37 parking violations.
l gave my sister-in-law the
money this morning to pay it off.
ls there any other way, Dfficer?
l woulda brought the check myself ...
- Tell it to the judge!
... but l had to go to work!
Slide, you goin' to the slammer?
Call my sister!
- Better not check his locker!
See you on visitin' day!
- Call my sister at the May Company!
l guess all debts are cancelled?
- No they aren't!
Back to work!
Come on, wash cars!
Call her!
What's the number of the May Company?
- Which one? - No idea, any one.
Will you come on?
l gotta go home, turkeys. See ya
tomorrow. - Don't do us no favors!
Go to the ''Bluebird Car Wash''
and give them your business.
Calvin!
You okay?
- Made ya look!
Little creep!
- Boy, watch where you're goin' !
He got it that time,
but he had it coming!
He's a pain in the ass!
- Mr. B, my money!
What money?
Hey, you firing me?
We'll talk inside. - l don't need your
stinkin' office! Fire me right here!
You were out yesterday, twice
last week. l need somebody ...
Now l'm warning YDU. l'm gonna
burn this place ... l don't need your
slave job? You think you're the boss?
You ain't, and l'm gonna git you.
l'm warnin' you, understand?
l'm gonna git you! - Everybody
back to work! l'm sorry, Duane.
My name's Abdullah, you ...
Come on!
No problem, brother,
you know what's up.
- Come on, now.
lt's all right. - Come on.
- Watch your ass, nigger. You hear?
Watch yourself!
- lt's all right, come on ...
Where's the aspirin, Marsha?
- lt's in your drawer.
Mr. B,
l'm sorry about Abdullah. l mean,
he's really wired up, you know.
l wish you'd give him another chance.
- l've given him 1000 chances.
The man is just confused ...
Lonnie, not now. Please!
Every week l try to talk to you,
every week you say ''Not now''.
l've worked here for over a year.
When's it gonna be?
l don't wanna talk about Duane.
Let's don't talk about Duane, let's
talk about me. l need more money.
l can't make it, l got 2 kids.
- ''Bluebird Car Wash'' is ruining me!
You got a big lot here. lf you
organize it right, you could make
twice as much ...
- Lonnie,
l know you got ideas ...
Don't l always pay you extra
for opening and closing?
lt's time to get back
in the music groove.
But first: Disco Dance!
Dutta my way!
Girl, please! No!
- l got an important call!
Come on, answer it, answer it!
''Born to Love''! The answer is
''Born to Love You''!
My name is Theodore Chauncey Elcott,
l work at the ''Dee-Luxe Car Wash''.
Dig, l'm gonna pick up the tickets
after work at 6. Cool? Beautiful!
We got a winner at the
''Dee-Luxe Car Wash'' in Los Angeles.
lt's Theodore Chauncey Elcott ...
- T.C.'s gotta stand for something!
l always thought
T.C. stood for Tough Chit!
l'm gonna try to get away later.
You gonna be home?
No, l'm going to
visit my sister tonight.
Well, maybe tomorrow?
Yeah, maybe.
Watch it, Marsha.
Hey, guys,
l just wanted to say it's been
really far out hangin' with you.
lt's been nice
hangin' with you too, man.
Good luck.
- Come back sometime. Good luck.
Lonnie ...
l didn't know where you were.
We'll talk about that stuff tomorrow.
We'll sit down and talk about
all the things on your mind.
You got my word.
l promise.
Scruggy, you gotta
help me pick the next race.
Charlene!
l told you, man, l told you!
- l was just gonna call you!
What's this? What are you doing?
Later, brother!
l was gonna call you.
l didn't mean to stay out last night.
Dne minute before 6. News, weather,
then weekend music, stay with us.
ls Loretta gonna pick you up?
Everything straight?
She's coming.
Hey, ya'll, it's quittin' time!
- l'm the boss around here.
l get to say when it's quittin' time.
- Well?
lt's quittin' time!
Thank you. Now for our
next impression: James Brown!
Brothers, l'm tired,
but l'm clean!
Who's got my ''Swahili Sheen''?
You know you got it.
- No, really, l don't.
Why you always hassle me? You
know l got a date! Come on!
Come on, brother!
The Fly flies again!
Triumphant after the Pop Bottle Bomber.
''lt's a bomb!''
You're just jealous
'cause l got the tickets.
Too bad you're goin' alone.
Here, honey,
l'll show you how.
We'll see who you takin' out tonight.
Where's your radio, brother?
l ain't never seen you without it.
l broke it.
- What, did you sit on it? - Yeah!
Charlie, hurry it up!
- Lonnie, you want a ride?
No thanks, Charlie
l gotta close up.
We'll wait for you.
- That's all right.
Try not to leave the locker room
too messy. - Will you listen to this?
Ding dong, fool is gone ...
We'll see you on ''Soul Train''.
- Good luck. - Thanks
l got a date!
Go ahead. l'll check out the register.
- Thanks, Lonnie.
You clean it up!
No congratulations?
l'm the big winner, and the
whole city knows it. How about that?
l won the concert tickets,
l'm gonna go pick 'em up.
T.C., l'm tired and busy,
and l've had a date ...
You listen: Ain't no prince gonna
come in an sweep you off your feet.
l'm your prince. No one digs you
as much as l do. You know that.
But unless you treat me different,
l'm not comin' 'round here no more.
And if you don't wanna go out with me
tonight, l'll find somebody who will.
T.C.?
l'm gonna be off in an hour.
Come back then?
That's what l wanted to hear!
The Fly flies again!
'Bye.
Here's the bus.
Loretta.
- Listen, l've been thinkin' ...
Let's not talk about it. We'll just
sit down calmly and discuss it.
No, 'cause l want you ...
- Next week. A deal? - A deal.
Move over, l'm drivin' !
- All right.
ls somebody out there?
Say, Abdullah, whatcha doin' here?
But l'm glad you come back. l'm having
a talk with Mr. B in the morning
to straighten out this mess.
- l didn't come here to talk, Lonnie.
l came for the money.
You gonna have to use that piece.
l am?
l forgot you was Mr. B's house nigger.
First you protect him, now his money.
l don't give a shit about his money.
l'm protecting you.
That's chump change!
What, you gonna buy a revolution
and solve all your problems?
- Give me the money.
We both know the jails are full
of young men just like you.
ls that what you want?
Come on, give me the gun.
l don't wanna kill you.
You don't have to.
Give me the gun.
Come on.
Come on, man.
Don't make me do it.
- Gimme the gun
Aw, shit.
lt's all fallin' apart, man.
- Come on. - lt's all fallin' apart.
lt's all right.
lt's all fallin' apart.
l know just how you feel, man.
l don't know, man. l don't know.
l know l'm not crazy, but every day
l have to come here
and watch this clown show,
sometimes ...
l just can't take it.
l know.
l know.
lt's gonna be all right.
We'll work it out. Together.
J.J. Jackson, the Prince
of Darkness, comin' to you at night,
'cause you know it's right.
The best no. 1 sound in the west:
''Car Wash''!
Dig the players on the session:
Blowin' on steam guns: Floyd and Lloyd,
Darrow lgus
and DeWayne Jessie.
Dn the vacuum: Hippo,
James Spinks,
and Lindy, Antonio Fargas.
Dig the Pointer Sisters and
Daddy Rich, Mr. Richard Pryor.
The taxi driver is George Carlin.
Dn shoes: Clarence Muse.
T.C. is Franklyn Ajaye and Mona
is Tracy Reed.
Duane, l mean Abdullah,
is Bill Duke. Lonnie: lvan Dixon.
Dn the bottle: Henry Kingi,
on burrito: Pepe Serna.
Geronimo is Ray Vitte,
Scruggs is Jack Kehoe.
The man with the mummy,
that's Garrett Morris.
Justin and Loretta:
Leon Pickney and Ren Woods.
Dutside, ''Miss Beverly Hills'':
Lorraine Gary.
lnside: Lauren Jones.
From left to right:
Leonard Jackson, Sully Boyar
and Professor lrwin Corey.
The hit on the head:
Richard Brestoff.
Dn make-up: Melanie Mayron.
Arthur French is Charlie.
And on skateboard:
Michael Fennell.
THANK YDU. CDME AGAlN!