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Carter & June (2017)
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(skateboard rasping) (rock music) (crickets chirping) (ship honking) Hey. [Man] What's up, man? Good? Yup. So how do I know these guys? You know, know my right. Would know these frat boys'd be better if they weren't too pussy to the try a real drug. What do you mean real drugs? I fuck like a beast when I'm on that meth, brah. That's good to know, because? All right, here they come. Frat boys, huh? [Man] These look like the fuckers I know. What's up? Don't tell me, I'm trying to guess what frat you guys are in. How about fuck your mama, that's what frat we're in. Hey, where Bobby at? Bobby's my little brother, fuckhead. Well relax, dude. Bobby's the one who made the deal with us so we're wondering where he is. Now you make the deal with me. Okay. Listen man, you wanna do business or you want to stand around and look tough? Come on. Let's do business. Got the cash? Give me the molly first. All right. It's okay? (sirens sounding) Fuck, cops! Fuck, man, run! Run, run, run!! Come on, come on, come on! Everybody run! Pleasure doing business with you gentlemen. Mr. Jenkins. Perfect timing as always, Eddie. The fuck is this shit? What, this? Sugar. Here, you can have it. Give it to Linda, maybe she can make a pie with it. Don't talk about my wife, asshole. We're not friends. If you ever let me run up on a bunch of skinheads again without a warrant, I will beat your ass. Sorry, what did you say? I was just thinking about your wife's pie. Fucking smartass. Motherfucker! Fucker, what the fuck, man!? (screaming over each other) What the fuck wrong with you, huh? Fucking cheat me, huh, cheat me? How dare you cheat me, huh? Fuck you, Carter. I don't trust your ass. The fuck did you get nunchucks, man? Jesus fuck. Goddamnit. (light rock music) Never have I had a rational mind and never have I been rational inside My gut, my heart and my head That's the way they've always been (car revving) You're early. What are you doing here, Tom, I have until six o'clock with him. You wanna fight about the difference between 5:45 and six, then you can lawyer up. Hey buddy, you have to go, okay? (boy whining) I know you don't want to go. No, it doesn't mean I don't love you. (boy whining) You're only acting like this because you know I can't afford the custody battle. [Dad] You can't, can you? Feeling not ashamed of what's inside of me And I will never Hey, what you say, Dolores? Carter, where's my 200 bucks? Next week, promise. Is he around? He's in his office. Cool, I'll just go say hi. Wait at the bar. Spot me a Jack on the rocks? You need to quit trying me, Carter. You just think you're so damn cute, don't you? [Woman] Hi, Carter! Hi, darling. Hey you guys ever get that raccoon out the house? [Woman] No. Oh fuck. I need you to understand this is a simple business. But you can make yourself a damn fine living provided you can convince the hard dicks who come through here that if they give you enough money, you might fuck them. See that's the common misconception about the strip business it's not about tits or ass or pussy, it's about the possibility of pussy. It's a con, pure and simple. These hard dick mouth breathers will buy you cocktails and cocaine and throw as much chit at your coochies you can catch under the pathetic misguided conception, maybe tonight might just be the night that you go home with them. That is of course, and this is the important part, so focus. You never actually fuck them. Hmm? The second you do that, the power flips, it's all over. And they won't even buy you a plan B pill after that. Now I'm telling you this because I think you could be one of the great ones. You've got the look. Do you have some daddy issues? Of course you do, who doesn't? That doesn't mean you can't make some cash. I'm talking real cash like Bennigan the money from back in the day, not the bullshit Applebees crap. That's only working three or four shifts a week. Spencer, what the fuck? What kind of nonsense are you filling my baby's head with? Oh I'm merely offering her some fatherly advice. Lord knows your daddy's not doing it from prison is he? Come on baby, let's go get you a cheeseburger and some soda pop. You come back when you're ready honey, I'll still be here. Fuck you Spencer, she's just a little girl. That you brought to a titty bar. Carter's here. Is he now? Oh that bitch better have my money. I had your money in my fucking hands. That little prick smacked me in the head and he took it. No. Yeah, can you fucking believe that? I mean Jesus Christ? Whatever happened to honor among thieves? So he struck you? Oh right here? Yeah, yeah, right, oh fuck! Your poor choice in partners is not my concern. At least when you worked with June you had one functioning intellect between the two of you. It's funny you mentioned June because I think she's finally starting to come around. Really? (slapping) Ow, goddammit. Think I give a fuck about your couple's counseling? Okay, okay, okay. Here. I've made you a lot of money in the past and I'll get you the rest by tomorrow. I'll come up with something, I always do. One day more and you will pay me every cent you owe me, do you understand? Now you made me late for my luncheon. I hate tardiness. Albert, bring the car around back! Is that a new ring you got? Feels like a new ring. Remember. Tomorrow by noon. Hey! Do you work here? Sadly, yes, that is my cross to bear. I wanna know what the hell we're supposed to do with this damn funny money here. They didn't tell us we can't change it back for real money if and we want. And they say it don't work in the bar nor the buffet neither! Now surely both of you been in the country fair. It's the same principle. That's bullshit. (tense music) (laughing) I just lit that cigarette. (bashing) (groaning) (bashing) See now they, just accosted me physically. You have accosted my finances. You care hazard a guess which one offends me more? I will never understand the allure of a titty bar buffet. Why the fuck are you still here? Go, steal something. Albert, where the fuck have you been? (phone ringing) Caitlin, long time no talk. Carter honey, I'm gonna be quick about this but how would you like to help me steal half a million dollars? (mumbling) you serious? I never joke about money. Spencer got me a job working at a bank. [Carter] Spencer, he's involved in this? He planted me there a couple months ago to scope the place out and, now he's gonna make his move. What do you need me for? Spencer wants to move me to Shreveport after the heist and this pussy I'm working with wants us to start a life up there together. As far as I'm concerned, married life ain't for me. I need a man who's a pro who I can trust. You help me with the plan, and the other half is yours. You want me to double-cross Spencer? Well yeah problem is, it's never that easy. Whatever, you want the money or not? Yeah, okay, all right. Meet me at Dino's? No, no, handsome. We'll discuss this at my place. No, no, no, no. Not the dungeon. I told you, I'm not really into that. Who you talking to? Um, just one of my clients. He wanted to tell me his wife is out of town. I'm thinking about a Pecan farm in Monroe, baby. Yeah. [Albert] Mr. Rabbit, can I ask you a question? You already have. Does this look real to you? Jesus Christ, Albert, get that thing out of my car. I bought it for 20. I wanna know if they ripped me off. Well I don't know. Why don't you go on to a field, pull the pin and if it blows your half brain Cajun ass to bits you'll know it's real. Well that's not very nice. What gray fuckery is this? This is the way you told me to go. Well does he just expect me to walk? [Albert] We could drive up if you like. Ah fuck it, I'll walk. [Albert] You sure? That's fine. I just wish the prick bastard had told me. I'd have worn different boots. Well fuck me. (mumbling) Keep talking. All you have to do is distract homeboy enough for me to sneak in and switch the envelopes and then hit the silent alarm if everything goes down and we'll let the cops come in and they'll get rid of the competition. Think you can handle that? What if to distract him, he takes me into the vault and rapes me? Okay, whatever, Caitlin, whatever game you have to play, just distract him somehow. Just keep him out of our way long enough. Trust me. Once I get a hold of a man's junk, I can make him do anything. It's like my superpower. I know, okay I believe you. But in the meantime, we need to come to an understanding. Wait, what are you? Hang on, you said whoah, you said you were gonna give me a light spanking. I didn't say spanking. I said paddling. And who said anything about light? Oh, fuck! (smooshing) (gun firing) [Spencer] Hello, boys. You know the drill, Mr. Rabbit. Are you kidding? This is my favorite part. Ooh, careful, that's a 38. Pull! (gun firing) Cockeyed piece of shit. Pull! (gun firing) Goddammit! Reed, what the hell are we doing out here? I thought we were having a proper lunch. I'm famished. Boy, you look like a goddamn Mardi Gras float. Well I dressed down for you today. Nobody will respect me as the Commissioner of the Force if they knew I fraternize with, well, people like you. Vegetarians? Pull! (gun firing) Son of a bitch! Yes, they did get away from you, didn't they? Well, you think you can do better? Well I could give it a go. Get him a gun. [Man] Yes sir. Thank you. Pull. (gun firing) You keep both eyes open when you fire a shotgun. The trick is to not overthink it much like most things in life. Just a little friendly advice. Shut up and give me my damn money. Looks like you're about 10 grand short here. It's a slow week at the club. You'll get the rest of your money by Monday. I better. You got no idea how much it cost to be respectable at this day and age. Oh I know buying you and your boys cannot be cheap. You damn skippy it ain't cheap. These things looking the other way when you're unloading the shipment. And do I need to remind you that longshoremen are union? And so are the truck drivers that look the other way when some whiskey falls off the back of their truck? I'm well aware of the sway you feel you hold over me, commissioner. I feel, do I? We'll see how much sway I have when you start applying for your permits for that new titty bar down on the corner. I got friends everywhere. You have friends? Or you have dirt on friends? Same thing. So, that'll be ten K by Friday. And if you want the permits for those girls to show their tits at your new club, you're gonna give me a downpayment on your new bar by Monday. 5,000 and a case of scotch do the trick? Try 150, smartass. But I will take that case of scotch. You son of a bitch, you're serious. Oh, my, yes sir. 150 by Monday. Get, go on. Say hi to dad for me. My papa never cheated on my mama! And he never sired no bastard queer son! Never! Pull! (gun firing) (knocking) This is bad timing. You are absolutely the last person I want to see right now. I just, I need five minutes, that's it. No. I have a job lined up right now that can solve all my problems! [June] You're my problem, Carter! I can help you get Ethan back. I mean it. Okay, so let me get this straight. Commissioner Reed has a private safe at a bank with a shit ton of money in it. Correct. And Spencer's gonna rob it using a hired gun and an inside man. [Carter] Correct. And how do you know this information? From Caitlin. Freaky Caitlin? How does she know? She's the inside man. And how did you get her to trust you? Eww. Those vaults require two keys. The first key is easy. But the second key, Is a client of Caitlin's. She made a copy. I always thought she was too clever just to be a stripper. Yeah, she's clever. She's also fucking insane. She's gonna cut my dick off if I fuck this up for her. June, just look at this smug bastard. He's just begging us to take his money. I don't know. I mean I'm desperate but, this is, This is a big score. You don't know exactly how much money is in that safe but there's enough for Spencer to take a big risk. I can't do it without you. So what's the plan? (light rock music) [Carter] The plan requires a briefcase with a false bottom. One antique clock, and perfect timing. Yes? Hello, Mr. Freely. Freely. [Mr.Freely] How may I help you? It's my understanding that this is the only bank in New Orleans with a class four vault. My client, Mr. Germain Bubli would like to rent a box for 48 hours. Well, we have a very secure bank vault room complete with magnetic locks. Excellent. That's precisely the degree of security that we expect. But our private banking services require an account balance of at least 100,000 dollars. (laughing) Mr. Freely. My client is in possession of a unique artifact. Very rare. You're going to want to see this. Right this way. In here is where we keep our cash reserves and our private boxes. And as you can see, this vault is absolutely impenetrable. Pardon the construction. [Carter] Of course. Rest assured, there will be zero compromise to security. You said Marie Antoinette owned it? Yes, and Napoleon. No, no, no, no! (speaking in foreign language) Your breath can contribute to oxidizing the metal. Of course. Merci. Well, all of our boxes here are on a two key system. The red key is for the client. And the blue key, which is kept by bank management. (rock music) (guns cocking) Do you think this will be sufficient for your needs? Let's go, everybody down, get out! (people shouting) What in Sam Hell is? Excuse me for just a moment. I'll be right back. (speaking in foreign language) To the minute. Just like old times. I think you telling him not to breathe on it really sold it. Don't even think about it! Get down on the ground! Now get your ass over here! Get down, hurry your ass up! Let's go, hurry up! Get down! (men shouting) You, get your ass up, let's go. Get up, get your ass up! No, no, please! No, no, please! Please don't hurt me, no! Don't shoot me, don't rape me. Please, I'm a virgin! Shut up! Relax. Please don't hurt me! Please don't hurt me, please! Please don't hurt me! Hey, hey, knock this shit off and open the fucking box. There's only half a mill here. Hurry, hurry, come on. There's an extra three million in the cash reserve. Baby you're out of your fucking mind. Spencer said... Do you want your pecan farm in Monroe, baby, huh? Yeah? Come here, come on. Take it off. (guns firing) (woman screaming) (gun firing in background) Lord almighty. Oh, fuck, goddamnit! Shots fired in New Orleans Bank And Trust at the corner of Common and Crondolette. [Man On Radio] Roger that, we're sending SWAT. Wait for backup. What the fuck is happening? I thought these guys were pros. (hyperventilating) Police, freeze, nobody move! (guns firing) (gun firing) (gun firing) Ah! (gun firing) There's one more in the vault. Roger that, I'm going in. (gun cocking) Police, nobody move! (gun firing) Oh, dear lord. (breathing heavily) (retching) If I distract the cop, can you get the keys from Caitlin. You sure? New plan, follow my lead. Hello? Who is that? We're hostages, behind the tarp. [Carter] Hey we're coming out, do not shoot, okay? [June] There's two of us and we're unarmed. All right, here we come. What is that? On the table now, now! Okay, okay, briefcase. (breathing heavily) Who are you? We heard the shooting and we hid behind the tarp. We saw everything. I killed her! I killed a hostage. That's not what we saw. What we saw was a horrible killer come and try to rape that poor innocent girl who definitely didn't want to be raped. And when she resisted, he shot her and you, you saved us from being next. That's true. That's exactly what I saw too. (sirens in background) Thank you so much for saving us! Thank you so much for saving our lives. It was so scary. Oh, I'm so sorry, are you, oh, oh, that looks awful, are you okay? [Cop] Yeah. Twitty. Are you okay? Yeah, code four, I'm okay. I'm okay. (slow blues music) (snapping) What do you mean they're all dead? I thought these fucksticks were supposed to be professionals. Dirty business robbing banks. Sometimes it pays, sometimes it doesn't. How the hell am I supposed to pay the prick Reed back by tomorrow? I don't have that kind of cash. Use the downpayment on the new lease, I guess. Fuck that! I'm not giving that asshole my future. (clanging) Tell Albert to pull the car around. Shouldn't you be swinging on a pole or some goddamn thing? So how's this gonna work? Did you happen to take a look at what type of gun the cop was carrying? A standard issue Glock, why? Glock, 40 caliber to be exact. Did you happen to see what type of gun the would be robber was carrying? Remington 45 ACP 1911 style, very high end. Okay. Very different bullets, very different holes. Ah, holes are important. Here, he's turning, don't lose him. We are witnesses, though. I mean you think it's gonna be that easy just to waltz back in there? The manager on a gurney and a big hero cop leading our way, piece of pie. I love pie. [Man] I was under that 711 sign. And that's when the lord came to me. Oh, is he gonna come to me? Oh, not yet baby. When he came to me I was on the drink. I was on the drink. Mhmm, I was on the pipe. I was on the pipe. Mhmm I was on my knees. Oh god, mama, Jesus, Mary night! Then he came to me and he said Lucas, the world is full of sin. Oh, it is so full! And you, as a sinner can lead the other sinners! Oh you lead them baby. You lead them now! (howling) Thank you Jesus. Thank you. (panting) And so, what else did God tell you? That he wants me to start a church. A church for sinners where it's okay to sin so long as you ask the Lord for forgiveness when you're done. [Both] Forgive me Lord. You know, a cool church. Yeah, but don't all churches do that? Like ain't they all for sinners? But they judge you. Why in this church, Oh shit, Jason's home. I got it, I got it. Honey, baby. Where you at? Oh sweet Lord almighty, Jason, what happened to you? I committed the worst sin there is. Adultery? Or, no, not that bad. Murder. We need to get back in there before Reed empties the safe or changes locks. Follow my lead. Always do. So, you saw my Jason kill that innocent girl and you all just lied about it? Well, listen, it was an accident, we all know that. It could happen to anyone, right? It could have happened to anyone. [Carter] But it's what you do now that matters. We wanna help you, Jason. We wanna help you make a wonderful thing out of a terrible thing. It's all terrible, all of it. No, it could be much, much worse. True. All the medical examiner has to do is take a look at the ballistics of the gunshots and your career would be over, you would be imprisoned for the rest of your life. Would you say that second degree murder and witness tampering would land one in Angola? [Both] Angola? I certainly would. She would. Or very big men will do very bad things to you. They hate cops in Angola. Tell me about it. [Carter] Officer Twitty. Young, handsome, fit, Officer Twitty. But, there's another way. [Carter] A better way. A better way. A way in which we would all profit. And all we need is five minutes alone in that vault. You don't even have to do anything, Jason. You just walk us in there and 100,000 dollars of it is yours. We'll even talk to our friends at the coroner's office and everything. I hear you Lord. You do realize that that's stealing, right? Well if it helps, don't look at it like stealing. Look at it as blackmail. I'm a police officer. I'm sworn to uphold the law. Well technically, you're also sworn not to shoot innocent people in the face. Hey, you two get the heck out of my house, right now! Now Jason! It is not Christian like to shout at our guests. Sit down. Sit! Now, is this 100,000 American Dollars? (sighing) Think he'll do it? There's two types of women in this world. Those who would never give a trucker a rim job in the bathroom in exchange for cash and cocaine, and women like Darlie Mae. That chick? Trust me, I know her type. She's in there right now leaning on him, promise. All right. So, where to? Home. Separate homes. I was just thinking. No, don't think. Tomorrow's a big day. All right. Listen, if all goes well, maybe, just maybe, we can go have one drink. Open the door. I'm gonna hold you to that. [June] Yeah, I bet you are. A drop of something cheerful, darling. Okay, they're gone. Baby, I don't know if I can do this. Yeah but that's an awful lot of money. I know. I got an idea. How about you go and wash up and then we can have some dinner and we can pray over it? And then maybe if you're good later then we can fool around. Sound good, sugar? I love you. You too, babe. Is he gone? I just sent him for a shower. We gotta talk about this. You gotta make sure he gets that money. The Lord told me. He talked to you again? While I was in the closet. He made all this happen so that we can start our own church! Our church? I'm gonna make you my Tammy Faye! Who? Just make sure he does it, okay? Okay. Now go. Gimme a kiss, gimme a kiss. (light rock music) Hey when you said Twitty was young, fit, handsome, Officer Twitty, how... (mumbling) Oh shit. (siren sounding) The usual. I act drunk and belligerent, call you a retard until the cop feels bad enough to let us go? Oh, you're out of practice, baby. He was waiting for us. [Jane] Seriously? Wait a second. Oh, it's just Eddie. Who's Eddie? How you doing, Eddie? Hey man, got to bring you in. Questioning and charges? Pick him up at Eighth and Maple. Gretna. Let's go. Eighth and Maple and Gretna? That's not police headquarters. Here we are. You mention our little arrangement, Aw come on, I didn't get this far by being stupid. That's debatable. Well. Mr. Jennings. I'm Detective Lieutenant Duke Johnson. How you doing? (siren sounding) Look familiar? It's hard to tell with the bullet wound to the head. Let me see if I can help you. Her name is, was, Caitlin Jackson. She worked at a bar called the Rabbit Hole. At the same time your girlfriend Miss O'Malley was there. I don't know if you've ever been to the Rabbit Hole sir, but a lot of girls work there. Two months later, she got herself a job working at the very bank that you and Miss O'Malley walked into this morning. Until she got her head shot up by a notorious bank robber from Miami. I mean, what are the odds? People still play the lottery. What were you and Miss O'Malley doing at the bank this morning? Depositing a check. And you and Miss O'Malley didn't know a bank robbery was gonna happen? No, sir, I had no idea. Probably would have picked a different bank. See it's pretty coincidental that a known felon and his felon girlfriend showed up to a bank robbery and left unscathed. Eh, number one, neither of us were ever convicted of any of those things so we're not technically felons. And B, she's not really my girlfriend. That's good. Say, Eddie, let me get a moment with him alone. Yes, sir. I appreciate you, Eddie. See the uniform guys didn't take it seriously. Well see these people didn't even go for the cash reserve. They were looking for something. What do you suppose that is, Mr. Jennings? Ah, that I couldn't tell you. I absolutely think you could. You have any idea why I brought you down here today, Mr. Jennings? I'm gonna give it a shot. You wanted to bring me someplace intimidating that let's me know your full force has a police lieutenant but isn't full of cops with big ears and even bigger mouths. That's why you had Eddie bring me down here because Eddie knows how to keep his mouth shut. Am I close? You're not as dumb as I thought you were, Carter. I'm sorry. You asked daddy for a band aid? I know. I know, it's gonna be okay. You're a big boy, okay? All right. Okay. I love you, I love you. Okay, bye. (tense music) Hey, did they know anything, what happened? Just a shakedown. They dragged out Caitlin's body. They still think the robber shot her. What else do they know? Less than they think. [June] Plan's still on? Yeah, plan's still on. Okay. Get me home. (bottles clanking) Oh, shit. Oh hey, what's up? You guys aren't working? Not at the club. Oh. (upbeat music) (mumbling) Why, you in a hurry? Where are you going so in a hurry, huh? I wonder why. Mr. Rabbit. You are stupid to even realize how much trouble you're really in, aren't you? Uh, no? Did we or did we not have an appointment today at noon? We did, I'm sorry, I just, (bashing) And have I not made my position on tardiness perfectly clear? Yes you have. I know you're kinda sick of hearing this but I swear I had the money in my hands. I have to take this. (bashing) You may speak. Oh, I don't know Sebastian. Why don't you rob a liquor store, pawn your shit but get me my money at your fucking thumbs. And why don't you tell everyone else who owes me money that now would be a very, very appropriate time for them to make themselves right with me. That's a lovely home. It's your shithole, right? So where were we? This time this plan is gonna work, I swear to God. Oh, okay, I'll bite, tell me. I can't give you specifics but by tomorrow afternoon, I'll pay what I owe you, I'll pay you double. Triple, I'll pay you triple. What do you have to lose? If I fuck up, you can still kill me tomorrow. But if I'm right, 30,000 dollars is a lot of dough. It's at least worth 24 hours. Well unfortunately events have conspired against me, now I find myself without many options. Against my better judgment I will give you one more chance. One more day. But if you fail, I know, fucking dynamite. Oh not only am I gonna shove a stick of dynamite up your ass and when you are gone, we'll break both of June's legs. And tell her it's because you put her life up as collateral. Are we clear? We're clear. You have a lovely evening, Carter. Not the fucking car, man! (booming) (somber rock music) Hey Twitty, nice going, man. Who's the man? (phone ringing) Officer Twitty? Detective Duke Johnson. Detective. Internal Affairs. Thought you were taking the day off. Well I just came by to get a clean uniform. Grab my SWAT gear out of my cruiser. Got it, got it. So let me talk to you for a moment. Uh, okay. So I read the report. Listen, is there anything else I should know, officer? Um, Well um, those guys that I shot, had they been arrested, would they have gone to Angola prison? Probably. What's Angola like? Oh, Angola ain't no place to be. Know what I'm saying? Well don't worry. A good shooting is a good shooting. We just have to investigate, you know, a matter of procedure. Yeah so what happens now? Well, firstly I prefer you not to shoot nobody else. (laughing) I'm just kidding you man. It's just a little Internal Affairs humor. But seriously. Don't shoot nobody else. Yes sir. Here's my card if you think of anything else. Take care of that ear. (tense music) Hey, sorry. Is it cool if I just iron my suit real quick and get changed? Where's your car? It was running a little hot last night so I didn't wanna take any chances. I'm sorry, Faustus, I think I need to change the battery on my hearing aid because it sounded like you said Canadian dollars. Fuck you! You borrow US dollars, I want US dollars back, you greaseball! (phone beeping) I have another call. Please do not make me come up to St. Louis. I hate the midwest. Hey Maury, thanks for getting back to me. Now listen, tell the bank they are going to get their money. I just gotta settle up with you know who and I gotta do a couple things you do not wanna know about so can you cover for me, baby? What? They can do that? Fuck! How much time do I have? Fuck! Fucking bankers are worse than I am! Hey baby. What you doing in here? I was thinking, baby. Maybe we should just tell Internal Affairs what really happened. No! No, we can't do that. This is the Lord's plan. But the Lord, You know what the Reverend Jenks says. What? He talks to God. Really? That's right. And God told him that it's okay to sin as long as you ask for his forgiveness. He's starting his own church. A really cool church. I just don't wanna sin, baby. Let me show you something. You see what you're experiencing right now? Mhmm. That's lust. And lust is a sin! But you're my wife. Exactly. If you lust after your wife, it ain't a sin. Stealing, though a sin it may be is not a sin if you use the money to start a church. It cancels itself out! Your conscience is clear, baby. Now, go rob that bank for the lord. Oh. I love you. I love you too. Three different kinds of greens? Wow, yeah green's a very creative color. Yeah, you can draw me some grass and then an alligator. Okay. You be good. I love you. All right bye bye. Bye, baby. You ready? Yeah. Just give me two shakes of a cocktail. You sure he's gonna go through with it? Angola. Rock and rollah. You look good. Wow, you look professional. Let's go. Agent Scully and I gotta interview Bigfoot later. Uh. [Carter] The name of the game is trust. [Jason] Trust? [Carter] First you're gonna have trust us that this isn't our first rodeo. Second, you're a hero cop. They're gonna trust whoever comes in with you as legit. [Jason] But how do I trust you guys? [Carter] You can trust that we want the money. [June] If we stick to the plan, everyone can profit. [Carter] Step one, we follow you in and you introduce us as FBI agents. Good morning. Tell me your name. I'm Anita Turner, I'm the bank manager here. Hi, Miss Turner. I'm Officer Jason. I know who you are. [Carter] Step two, you tell the acting bank manager that we have to examine the vault. While that's going on, you distract everyone by signing autographs and shaking hands. [Jason] And what about y'all? What are y'all gonna do inside the vault? [June] After checking to make sure the security camera is still disabled, Each of us will have our keys. Shit. We open the safe and carefully switch out the decoy envelope for the real thing and wallah, [June] We're all rich. [Jason] Well what happens if other cops come by? [Carter] We've got that covered. [Jason] What if Commissioner Reed shows up? [Carter] Trust me, that's never gonna happen. Morning! Heard you guys had a little trouble here yesterday. Yes we did, sir. It'd have been much worse had we not had this brave gentleman right here. Well done, Officer. Twitty. Officer Twitty, well done. Now Miss Turner, if you don't mind I'd like to get to my safe. - Yes sir. - Uh. Shit! It's Commissioner Reed. Oh, Commissioner, you're running for Governor this year, right? Uh, maybe next year son, but if you'd excuse me, please? Well, well, if I could just, Why don't you call my office on Monday? We could always use a good cop like you in our outfit. Just stay in character, we'll be fine. Who are they? [Anita] FBI, they worked on the safe. [Jason] Well. Thought the FBI finished yesterday. Well we we're just, we're looking for, Bigfoot. I mean Angola. Ervin suggests this is the work of a ring hitting up banks along the south. They're known as the Bigfoot ring. The evidence indicates that they originated in Angola prison. Hmm. [Jason] That's what I was trying to say. Did you find anything? Not yet, but we will. But you're leaving. Exactly. [Jason] Nice to meet you, commissioner. [Carter] Yee hoo! What the heck is that? We've been had? Relax, Alfalfa, they're bearer bonds. They're untraceable, they're as good as cash. This is easily half million. Sweet Lord Almighty, we're rich! We did it. We did it. Wow. There's photographs in here. Of what? Weird shit. Shady meetings, politicians with hookers and fucking cocaine and weird sex. And there's Caitlin! Oh, disgusting. [Jason] What? There's a monkey. It's gone. It's all gone. What's gone? All of it! Dolores, any word from Carter? Not yet. But Peaches wants to talk to you about Cookie Stardust. What? Why can't you deal with that? I tried but she won't listen to me. She said you're the rabbit and this is your hole. Takes a stripper named Peaches to sum up my life. Fine, send them in. Goddamn idiot. How many fucking times do I have to tell them that I cannot sell any more of these piece of shit AKs? How many fucking times? I need Glocks, goddamnit! [Dolores] Nine mil, or 40 cal? Stop ignoring us! Why did you need to fire Cookie Stardust? It's not fair. Because she started to show. And nobody, nobody normal, wants to see a pregnant stripper. Why can't she retire like Jay Z or Eminem and come back in a year? See that's called a sabbatical. (phone ringing) Hold on. Albert, please do not waste my time unless you're calling to tell me you have the money. I don't care. Hold on. Okay you see, when you leave a job for a year or two and you come back, that is called a sabbatical. When you leave a job and go to Florida to play golf until you are dead, that is called retirement. There is a difference. Jay Z and Eminem do not know that but now you do. Know what? Okay, the class is over. Get back to work. I don't care. If he doesn't have the money, pull his gold teeth out of his fucking skull! That means she can retire for a year and come back, yes? If you mean can she take a sabbatical, sure whatever, get the fuck out of my office now! All right, you heard the man. Get out there and shake something. I don't care if you don't have any pliers. Use a hunting knife or a crowbar. Improvise like I taught you! Dipshit! Are you really gonna let her just up and leave like that and then come on back? Oh please. A fortnight after I give away her shift these girls won't even remember the name of, Cookie Stardust? Cookie Stardust. No. Oh bless you Dolores, you are my rock. Besides I do not have time for stupid stripper shit now. Call Albert's cousins. See if I can unload this shit on him. I need cash, fast. Oh, also, the ice machine is broken again. You need to make three more cases of Jack Daniels fall off the back of a truck. And the men's bathroom has gone down. (phone ringing) That's Reed. Of course it is. Get out. Hold please. [Reed] How dare you put me on hold, you cock sucker! Oh relax, your money's on its way. That's not what I'm calling about you bedazzled fuck. I just lost something much more important. Go on. Who's the dude with a bike who just looked like he just fucked a light socket? Oh that, that's Reverend Lucas Jenks. He's our personal pastor. He's starting a church for sinners. [June] He's come to the right place. [Lucas] Amen. Ah, yes! Woo! Yes! Check it out, good as cash. Well congrats, man. You're rich and you're not gonna get raped to death in Angola, so that's a win. (laughing) Well this money isn't for us. It's for the Lord. That's right. Mhmm. All right. Some cocky piece of shit goddamn redneck had the gall to clean out my safe! And you will be calling me why? You're going to find them and you're going to exact retribution on my behalf. Well if they're local I can find them but what's in it for me? Fuck you! You get to stay in business, that's what's in it for you. Okay then, 10 percent of whatever I recover would be fine, thank you so much. You are such a giver. Sucking dick make you deaf, boy, huh? I said fuck and you! Really? 15 percent, why you are so generous. 15 percent. But listen here. There are photos in that envelope too. Ooh, what kind of photos? Let's just say if those photos go wide, we both go to jail. Boy, you fuck me. So help me god, I will ram a SWAT team so far up that hole of yours you will spit cop! You do have a way with words. I'll call you when I know something. Dolores! Okay, this is what we do. I want guys on the street asking questions. And Gill? Yeah. I want you to follow that cop Twitty everywhere. [Gill] Consider it done. Who's handling the investigation? I believe Detective Johnson is. Johnson, shit. Motherfucker's been dying to put me in jail. Someone stole the bonds from Reed that I was gonna steal. Turns out, Reed was keeping something else in that safety deposit box. That little bitch Caitlin must have been planning on double-crossing me this whole time. Still, it had to be a two person job. Dirty business, stealing. Well, can't convert the bonds till tomorrow. There's really nothing left to do tonight. What do you think? Hootenanny? Hootenanny. (country music) I wanna go where my country girl goes Like where my green grasses grow I feel at ease with my country girl, yeah She knows how to groove me I'll take you back bout a year before She's on earth (slow country music) What if I told you I was pregnant? (laughing) That's a little fast, you know, biologically speaking. Just testing you. I was never very good at tests. But you're very clever. (laughing) You'd be a great father. Oh, come on. [June] What? That's crazy. You're so good with Ethan. He's a great kid. I'm nobody's father. I don't even know what the fuck that word means. I never knew my dad. I'm in love with you. And I love Ethan. And when I see you guys together, it's fucking, it's amazing. No kid should have me as a dad, it's not fair. Yeah. [Lucas] We need the rest of the bonds. For the Lord is good. And his love endures. Psalm Chapter 100 verse five. We already have 100,000 dollars. I mean isn't that enough to start a church? Of course, I think it is. But this ain't me talking, Brother Jason. It's the Lord telling me what's what and all I'm doing is passing along the word. Think about it this way, honey baby. They're bad people. And they're gonna do bad things with that money. They are. We're gonna use that money for good. We will. Mhmm. Brother Jason? The Lord needs you. He needs you to go get that there money so that we can build us a hot damn, forgive me Lord, awesome church. That's right. (light music) (motorcycle revving) [Gill] Ain't no way an honest cop can have a wife that hot. Hey Carter? Carter? (knocking) Only you would forget your keys after leaving. Whoah. Where's Carter? What the fuck are you doing? The Lord's spoken, June. We need the rest of that money for our church. What? You're trying to steal money I need to get my son back for Jesus? Don't listen to her lies. I'm not lying. This is important, June. God told him! What am I supposed to do? Wait. Hey, what are you doing, what are you doing? I'm just turning on the light. Turn yourself in. Confess that you shot the girl. Go to jail and pray for forgiveness. The Lord don't want him to pray. He wants the cash! And I don't want to have to hurt you, darling. But those bonds belong to God. Now give them to me! Give me the money, June! It belongs to the Lord now! Okay, okay. Over there, you asshole. I'm rich! I mean Jesus is rich! You are taking the only hope I have of getting my son back because your wife and this fucking bullshitter told you to. This is wrong, you know that. The Lord will anoint you with everlasting life. What does that mean? Where's Carter? I don't fucking know, he's gone. He's gone? You guys are literally the stupidest people I've ever fucking met and I'm from Oklahoma. I got it, I got it. You just tell Carter he better not follow us. This money belongs to God now. Amen. Whoah, whoah. Oh shit! (bashing) (gun firing) Hey, I'm an officer of the law. You're all under arrest. One more word out of you, you're gonna be just another dead dirty NOLA cop, do you understand me fucktard? Yes or no? I got this one trying to run out the back, boss. You're Spencer Rabbit. Yeah, no shit. Mr. Rabbit, my name is Reverend Lucas Jenks. Perhaps you heard of me. You are the talk of the town, Reverend. [Jason] Hey, that's not yours. All right, little girl. Where are the photos? What photos? The photos that are supposed to be with the bonds, don't be a shithead! I don't know, maybe Carter has them. All right, well where the fuck is Carter? Baby girl, you have officially gotten on my last nerve. Let's all move this melodrama down to the hole, shall we? Come on! [Lucas] Mr. Rabbit, I'd like to talk to you about a business proposition for the Lord. How about setting up a church down in either uptown or in the bywater. And now, there's some circumstances that I'd like - to talk to you about. - Oh shit. I have good news, I am in possession of the bonds and the photos. However, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to restructure our deal. Boy, if you fuck me, It's going to go something like this. In addition to the 15 percent of the bonds, I'm gonna stop paying you to move my shit through your pores. And you are personally going to see to it that all my permits go through. It is either that or these photos go wide. Fuck you very much. You don't have the photos. Oh it's classic power play, my dear Pepper. Don't call me that. I have proprietary value, it'll be as worth as the photos. You, my dear sweet girl. Get in the car, bitch. Gill. Where the fuck are you? I know Spencer Rabbit's involved, you moron. (car starting) Get whatever you need but I need you to do this cleanly. This cannot be connected to me. Shoot! Okay. Lord, give me a sign. What should I do? Fuck! Oh! Mysterious ways! Commissioner, we're here. Remember, bonds are important. But the most important thing are the photos. You do what you have to do but we can't have witnesses. Once you know the photos are on site, eliminate everyone. (sighing) June? June?! June! They're gone! Gone! Spencer took them. He left a note. (phone beeping) (phone ringing) Spencer Rabbit, how may I help you? Spencer, it's Carter. Oh good evening, Carter. I'll cut to the chase. I assume you have the photos. What photos? I am not in the mood. Good. I give you June, you give me the photos. Do we have a deal? Listen, I want the cop and the douchebag too. I'm sorry, is this the saint Carter Jennings? He's an honest cop, Spencer. I got him into it. Eh. Hey look, just promise me you won't kill him until I get there, yeah? Okay, I tell you what. I promise you I won't kill the cop. Fuck! (laughing) Every fucking time. Jesus fuck. (tense music) Pepper, Pepper, Pepper. I always thought you were too smart to be a stripper, but apparently you are too dumb to be anything else. This is all your fault, you realize. Excuse me, Mr. Rabbit. To finish what I was saying, the Lord's... I hear those words come out of your mouth one more time, I'm gonna bash your fucking skull in. Whoah, whoah, whoah. Take it. Okay. You need a gun. Thank you, thanks Darla. I just, I'm not really a gun guy. Fine. (snorting) So you think that just by giving Spencer the envelope and hoping that he gives us our people back, that is our best option? I do, yeah. Spencer's a businessman. I know the Lord packs a lot of firepower but you and me going in there with nothing but a gun and my smile, it's suicide. Would you die to save June? Well if I don't have to, why... Would you die to save June?! Yes, yes, yes, I would! Absolutely! If I had to, yes! Fine. We'll try it your way. But if he doesn't give us what he swore by God to give us, we're gonna take him back. Darla would you point the gun someplace else, please? (exhaling) Spencer, we go way too far back. My credit with you is good. Oh my sweet girl, how do I make you understand this? You know in the movies when some asshole starts talking about the first time they kill someone and how it felt so wrong and you never forget your first kill and all that sort of bullshit? It's not the case with me. The only thing I remember from my first time is I got paid 500 dollars to do it and I got pissed off 'cause the motherfucker bled all over my Levi's jacket and I had to throw it out. Pappy Melbourn used to send me out, it's long before your time. He used to just write down a name, hand the money to one of the other boys and say into the thin air, send the faggot with the knife. If he didn't want somebody dead he'd say send the faggot with a hammer. I'd be standing right there, he never once spoke directly to me. Apparently I made him uncomfortable. But he sure as fuck appreciated my work ethic. So yes, Pepper, we have known each other a long time and the truth is I do like you. So please hear me. And it's gonna sound like a cliche but remember cliches exist for a reason. It's not personal. It is just business. Business? You can't do this! I am a police officer! (bashing) Now, Mr. Rabbit. You're a businessman. And as a businessman I am telling you this is a great opportunity for you to make some real money and find forgiveness. I'm telling you, it's a cool church. The Lord forgives, Brother Spencer. Even someone like you might find... (bashing) (screaming) Well now, I did warn him. Oh shit, that's not gonna come out. Darla, stay with me. It's gonna be fine, Jason is okay. (gun firing) Goddamnit! Oh shit, I just bought this suit. [Gill] Hello, Nancy. Is that supposed to be some type of slur? The Commissioner needs his files tonight. (coughing) And I looked, and behold was a pale horse. And his name as sought on him was Death. And hell followed with him. And the power that was given unto them was to kill with the sword. What are you doing? He asked for my help retrieving his property and then he sends his goons to shake me down. I'm getting so sick of this shit. Shut your goddamn mouth, faggot! (gun firing) I do not like that word! (guns firing and bullets ricocheting) Take that! (screaming) (gun firing) Don't do this. I'm sorry, Jason. Oh shh. I'm gonna start that church, okay? You're a good man, Jason Twitty. I love you. [Jason] I love you. (sobbing) Make a run for it, boss. I'll cover you. How do you even know that thing's gonna work? (tense music) [Gill] Ah shit! (booming) Give me the files! Wait, okay, okay, okay! Give me the fucking files! Spencer, let's talk. Don't fucking fuck with me. Freeze! Drop the weapon, Spencer. Drop it now! Fuck! That's evidence. Put that in the bag. I'm gonna do what I should have done from the start. You. I am not a dirty cop! Listen officer, surely we can come to some sort of agreement. (bashing) [Carter] Baby. Don't, don't, don't fucking touch me. Hey! Fuck you, Carter! I'm sorry, okay? I can't believe I fell for it again. Hey, what's going on? You left me, what's going on. What are you talking about, I didn't leave you, no I didn't. I woke up and you were gone! I went to go make copies of the photos so that we could have some leverage in case the shit hit the fan. You left a note. I left a statement. It was a goodbye note, Carter. It didn't say goodbye. It said I don't deserve you. Because I don't. You're the best thing that ever happened to me. I know I fucked up in the past. I've been an idiot. It'll never happen again. You were really willing to take a bullet for me? I'd have taken all of them. Fuck. When this trunk opens, you get behind me and you stay there, okay? I love you. I, I love you. Detective Johnson? No, it's your guardian fucking angel. Get your ass out of that trunk, come on. Come on. You too. So, uh, I get a call from Officer Twitty saying that he want to turn himself in for the murder of Caitlin Jackson and for aiding in a bank robbery. I can explain that. I thought you were gonna call me when the job was done. I mean that was the deal, right? Yeah, no I was. But I was, you know, I was a little jammed up, If you know, why haven't you arrested him? He's a criminal. Quiet, Junior. What about your oath? What about justice? [Duke] Justice? What's that? Drop gun. Don't have no serial numbers. And what's in that bag is gonna help me be police superintendent. So you can exercise justice right here, right now. Wait, wait, wait. We have a deal, I got you Reed's files. That's murder. Do you have any idea how many people this devil has killed? Shit people ain't gonna be surprised if he turns up dead. Shit, you might even be a hero. And these two, a dead thief and a dead stripper, shit, ain't nobody gonna miss them. Three less things we gotta worry about. Jason, Jason, come on. [Duke] Fuck three less things we gotta worry about. Oh fuck that, this isn't funny! Do it. Jason. Come on, do it! Boy please. Your casefile's sitting on top of my desk. I end up with a bullet hole in my head, guess who they're gonna look for first? Well stop being such a little bitch and just do it. Not the face, you asshole. (clicking) (clapping) Good to know a little coaxing will do what needs to be done. I don't know how I feel. You did good, kid, you did good. Mr. Rabbit, witnesses will testify that you were nowhere near the Rabbit Hole when that shit went down. And after Commissioner Reed goes to jail, you're gonna pay 10 Gs a month to my new protege. Wait. He'll take his cut and give me the rest. Oh isn't that the story of my fucking life? What about us? That deal we made in the coroner's office still stands, Mr. Jennings. You're free to go. All right Junior, let's roll. You need some rest, and I got a coverup to stage. Take care of that fool. Have a good night. Come on. Carter, be a dear and come unlock these so I can kill this motherfucker. Listen, I'm sorry. [Spencer] Oh, you are sorry? I am, I'm sorry about everything. I just, I did what I had to do, you understand. Hmm. Oh fuck, oh look, I owe you 30K, right? How about I give you 50, and yeah, we call it a day? Well. Well 50 does sound wonderful, how's about this instead? You keep the 50, give me the rest and I never see either one of your faces again? It's that or I take all the money and slit both your throats. You're handcuffed and bleeding. Choose wisely. You are smarter than you look. You son of a bitch. (laughing) You are such an asshole. It's gonna take you a minute to find those. But when you do, you can unlock yourself, drive yourself home. Happy hunting. What's the matter? You ever heard of honor among thieves? You fucking swamp coyote! So you made a deal with the cops? What if I told you you no longer have a custody problem in any court in Louisiana? Seriously? Oh my god, that poor kid. (light country music) I wanna go where my country girl goes Like where my green grasses go I feel at ease with my country girl yeah She knows how to groove me I take you back bout a year ago She was born of earth fire and water She stays alone in a house by a waterfall There by herself there I wanna go where my country girl goes Like where my green grass is growing I feel at ease with my country girl yeah She knows how to groove me I said goodbye and she sailed away Man you can tell that she loves me Hope ain't no need to my life Even in the way I told him My soft ship shining I wanna go where my country girl goes Like where my green grass roots are growing I feel at ease with my country girl yeah She knows how to groove me I'll take you back out a year ago She was born of earth fire and water She stays alone in a house by a waterfall Lives there herself on there I wanna go where my country girl goes Like where my green grass roots are growing I feel at ease with my country girl yeah She knows how to groove me (rock music) Nashville you can play the jack of diamonds Tulsa, you can draw the ace of spades New York City, the king of clubs Music and the arts New Orleans got those wild wild hearts Real cool chick from OK City Full of fire and twice as pretty Why is nothing going right for you It's time to try your luck down in New Orleans Figured you have not that much to lose Queer old Cajuns, saints and sinners Let's hit Bourbon street for dinner Mardi Gras can't be that far away Alan Tussant, Doctor John Fats Domino, Louis Armstrong If you ask them they would surely say Nashville, you can play the jack of diamonds Tulsa you can draw the ace of spades New York City, the king of clubs Music and the arts New Orleans got them wild wild hearts |
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