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Christmas Wedding Tail, A (2011)
Isn't Christmas beautiful?
The decorations, the ornaments and my favorite-- gingerbread! Yum! My name's Rusty. And I hope you're in the mood for a good old-fashioned Christmas tail, 'cause I've got one. This wasn't just any Christmas. Yep, that's me-- Rusty Campbell. No, that-- that's not me. Over-- move over-- yeah, that's me. Look at you, Mr. Handsome. And that beautiful babe next to me-- that's Cheri. Watch it, buster. What? I'm telling the story here. Seriously, folks, isn't she the most beautiful bride you've ever seen? Your owner's not so bad either. Do you, Jake, take Susan to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for as long as you both shall live? Oops, getting ahead of ourselves here. If you want to hear this Christmas wedding tail, we've got to go all the way back to the beginning. ? It's Christmas time of year ? ? Everybody swing ? ? Yeah, it's Christmas time of year again ? ? And the trimming's on the tree ? ? 'Cause everybody here loves Christmas ? ? Here we go, let it snow, ho ho ho ? ? Well, it's Christmas time of year ? ? With the presents under the tree ? ? Yeah, it's Christmas time of year again ? ? There's a stocking there for me ? ? Does everybody here love Christmas? ? ? Yeah, here we go, let it snow, ho ho ho ? ? Here we go, here we go, ho ho ho ? ? Here we go, here we go, ho ho ho ? ? Here we go, here we go, ho ho ho. ? It was early October and Susan had taken me to the dog park for some quality bonding time. Little did I know my life was about to change forever. There's got to be something available, Pat. There's got to be something available, Pat. No, Susan, listen, you've got to be patient, okay? There's got to be something. You hear that? That's not sleigh bells. That's the sound of crickets. Towards the end of the year, none of the major museums are hiring. None of them? Relax. Don't get your bloomers in a bunch, okay? A curator with your qualifications is gonna get offers. It's just gonna take some time. Well, I hope so. Maybe something back East, let me get out of California altogether. Don't worry, you will. But in the meantime, do me a favor. You know how those small towns are-- they suck you in. And next thing you know you're running a little coffee shop or something.. Don't worry. I'm a city girl. The small town is not for me. That's when I saw her, her tail floated through the air like a cloud. I just love a woman with a sense of style. -- Rusty! Is everything okay up there, Susan? Rusty, Rusty. You go get 'em, Sue. You go get 'em. All right, all right. Pat here. How can I be of service? You need a job, huh? Well, you came to the right place, buddy. I'm going into a tunnel. Oh my gosh. Oh look, I'm losing you. Don't touch my fish. They're poisonous. - Hey there. - This is an A and B conversation, so why don't you C your way out of it? My name is Rusty. I'm Not Interested. At least tell me your name. If you don't tell me, I'm going to have to guess. Foo-Foo? Pookie? Tawana? Not even close. Rusty, got you. Cheri, I leave you for a minute, and already you've made some friends here. Cheri. I loved the way it rolled off the tongue-- or the way it would have rolled off the tongue if I could actually speak. It was love at first sniff. Everything okay? Lana, what are you up to? Oh, it's okay. I think they just got away from us for a second. - It's good to see you, Jake. - Thank you, Reverend. How are you? - I'm great. Thank you for asking. - Good. Listen, I've got to run. Hey, Susan, do me a favor. - Will you tell your mom I said hi? - I will. See you guys later. Come on, let's go, Lana. Come on. Hi. Rusty, you cannot run away from Mommy like that. You about gave me a heart attack. Okay, easy with the Mommy stuff. I'm with a lady here. Oh, it's okay. They've got great security here. It's really not a problem. Besides, it looks like they like each other. "Like" is a strong word. - Yeah. - This is my Cheri. Yes, I said Cheri. And my name is Jake. Cheri. Wow. I'm Susan and this is Rusty. Hey Rusty. How are you, buddy? Well, it's nice to meet you guys. I haven't seen you around though. Are you new? Yeah, we just moved up from LA. Oh, a city dog, huh? I should have known. Really? That's a big change. Why the move? Um, lots of reasons. Mostly my mom has an antique store over in Los Olives. Gussied Up-- maybe you've heard of it. - I have. - Yeah, I'm just helping her out. Well, I hope your mom's working you hard. Oh yeah, she's a slave driver. In fact, I'd better get going. - Okay, sounds good. - Okay. Nice meeting you. Okay. Come on, honey. Hey, you know, if you want to actually do something fun, I work at a winery. Bridle wood-- maybe you've heard of it. No, I haven't. If you would like, I could give you a personal tour. Maybe Friday at 5:00, 1:30 or 2:30... ...or 4:45-- whatever works for you? As I sat there watching for what felt like an eternity, all I could think about was, "The next words out of her mouth could define my romantic destiny." Oh, you can be so dramatic. Sounds like a plan. Sounds good. Nice meeting you. All right. It's been a pleasure meeting you, madam. Oh, believe me, the pleasure was all yours. Bye. Come on, Cheri. I love it when a plan comes together. That night I could barely sleep. She was all I could think about-- her gorgeous hair, the way her hindquarters shook when she walked. Hey, there might be kids watching this. It turns out I wasn't the only one bitten by the love bug. You met someone? What's his name? Does he have a job? Mom, it's no big deal. We met at the dog park. Hey! Dude. - Hey man. - You just about gave me a heart attack. Sorry. I was just cleaning this. So did you get this whole thing cleaned? I cleaned it. It's clean. - Hey. - What? - I meta girl. - What? Yes, at the dog park. She's beautiful. She's even got a little dog that can hang out with my little Cheri. - Here's the kicker. - What? She's not from around here, just moved into the area. And I told her I worked at a winery. I invited her over for a little tour. He offered to show me around the winery where he works. The winery? He works at-- does he own the winery? You told her you work at a winery? You should say, "I own a winery." - That's what I say. - I don't know. Details. I guess I figured new town-- new start. Maybe it's time to get back on the horse. Did you say anything about the kids? Well, no. It was this fast. It was like, "Hey, our dogs like each other. You want to come to the winery?" It was that fast. I didn't get a chance to talk about the kids. Are you crazy? You didn't say anything about the kids? A single mother of three boys-- some men might find that intimidating. Wait wait wait, don't you watch "Oprah"? Sensitive guys are in, dude. Says the guy who thought "The Notebook" was a comedy. Look, you don't know anything about him. Just don't get hurt. I won't let myself get hurt, Mom. Okay, I have to go pick up the boys. What time do we open anyway? Two hours ago. Okay, Rusty, let's go. Come on, let's go get your boys. Wait a second. So you don't actually work at a vineyard? You own this vineyard? I actually inherited it when my folks passed away. it's beautiful. It is beautiful. I've actually had a lot of offers from people to buy this place, but I can't imagine anyone else managing it. And half the people that work here have been here since before I was born. Whoa. Watch your step. - Here, hold on to my arm. - Thank you. What about you? What was your business back in LA? I was a curator at the California Museum of Art. - Really? - Yes. Wow. What happened? Budget cuts. My department got consolidated. So here I am. Ouch. Where are all the grapes? The grapes have already been harvested. They've been barreled. They're fermenting. And we'll bottle them by Christmas. Oh, Christmas. I love Christmas. Yeah, me too. It's the time of year I can remember my whole family being together. Mm. Yeah. - Are you hungry? - Yeah, I'm starving. That's good, 'cause I had the chef make something special for us. - Shall we? - We shall. Let's do it. All right. - There it is. - There you go. Oh, that smells delicious. Sir. Okay. Wow, thanks, Frank. It's a special mixture of black truffles, sausage and oyster stuffing in one stunning chicken. Okay. Or I'll be right back. - That's Frank. - Yeah, he's a keeper. He's my boy. He's my boy. Speaking of chicken, did you know that the longest recorded flight of a chicken was 13 seconds? No, I did not know that. I am an encyclopedia of useless information. Well, if you're speaking of poultry, did you know that Donald Duck's middle name was Fauntleroy? - Fascinating. How about this one? Cookie Monster's first name-- Sid. Sorry. Yeah, food. That was very impressive. Wow. Well, I guess we know our children's programs here. Apparently. - Hey, I actually wanted to talk-- - You know, there's something I wanted to tell you. Sorry, you go ahead. Go ahead. No, I insist. - I have three boys. - I have two children. What? Really? I can't believe you just said that. You don't know how worried I was to tell you that. No, I was worried that you were-- not that you were gonna say, but I was" I didn't want to say it too. I'm-- Can I show you pictures? Yes, please. This is so great. I had no idea. - Really? - Yes. - Why would you lie? - I know. - Oh. - That's my youngest. That's Emma. She's seven. Oh, I bet she loves ponies and Barbies and-- More like spiders and frogs and snakes. You know, anything that slithers or spits venom-- she's probably got it. Still, she's adorable. She's a cutie. And this is my oldest, just turned 11, loves anything with a ball or a puck. Oh, he's so handsome. What's his name? Her name is Madison. It's a girl? She wanted to join the rugby team. I had to draw the line somewhere. I hope I'm not scaring you right now. No no, not at all. In fact, here you go. The one on the left is Logan. He is going to be the first nine-year-old with his own four-star restaurant. - That's amazing. - Well, maybe he can help me out 'cause I can barely boil a pot of water. The one in the middle is Josh. He is gonna be the next Mark Zuckerberg. Is he really? I don't know where he finds the time to study though. He's always tinkering around on his computer. And who's this little guy on the end? Oh, that's my Ryan. He's too young. He doesn't know what he wants to be. He's a snappy dresser. Yeah, that's a new phase. He actually hasn't said much since his dad passed away. I'm sorry to hear that. Yeah, the psychologists say he will talk when he's ready. Well, after my wife passed I had a really hard time wanting to talk to anyone about it, so I get what he's going through. It's a lot of emotion and pain to deal with. Yeah, so much, you don't really know what to do with it. Exactly. It's so hard. I can only imagine how hard it must have been for the boys. Well, they're lucky to have a mom like you to help them through it. Yeah. Well, that was kind of amazing. That was great. It was really fun. We should do it again. Okay. Wow, you have frogs here. Yeah. - Till the next time then. - Okay. What can I say? My little Rusty was an excellent matchmaker. Why don't you tell them what happened next? Once things got rolling between them, things moved pretty fast. And Jake and Susan grew closer and closer. Finally it was time for the kids to meet. They seemed to have a great time, didn't they? You're going down, sister. You wish. No one beats Madison. Hike the ball already. Come on. Hike. Oh yeah, it was classic. Yes! Oh! - Yes yes yes! Nice job. Let's go back. Fire guns. Guns ablaze. Guns ablaze. Guns ablaze. - Loser. - Daddy! Everyone started spending time together. ? Angel rubbed her eyes ? ? She turned away ? ? She thought that her mind had gone astray ? ? But the little man gently touched her ? ? Said, "Girl, I'm on your side..." ? - I'm supposed to put all this in here? - Yeah. - All of it? - All of it. Yeah, that's good. That's a whisk. - Do I mix it up here like this? - No no. Okay. This is important. I have to be able to impress Susan. - No, you should-- - I don't know anything about cooking. Okay, thank you. - Bend down a little bit. - Press "on"? - Press the "on." - Uh-huh. Okay. That's not funny. That is not funny. And everyone was having the most amazing time. ? There he goes, Whoo! ? Best of all, I got to spend more time with my beloved Cheri. Those were good days. Yes, they certainly were. And before you knew it, the Christmas season was here. ? Deck the halls with boughs of holly ? ? Fa Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia ? ? 'Tis the season to be jolly ? ? Fa Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia ? ? Don we now our gay apparel ? ? Fa Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia ? ? Troll the ancient Yuletide carol... ? Jake decided to invite us all over for Thanksgiving dinner. - I didn't take it though. - Yes, you did. You guys, slow down by the pool. I don't want anyone-- oh gosh, don't get hurt, please. Oh, this is so beautiful. I don't need anyone getting hurt before the meal. - I know. Thank you so much. - I didn't take it. Give it back. Hey, it took all day to make that oyster stuffing. Oh! - My computer. - Oh, I'm so sorry. Oh boy. What is going on over there? I told you not to take Bridget out of the cage. Wait, who's Bridget? Bridget's the mouse. There's a mouse? Where? - Over there. - Bridget! - Where? - Oh, here it comes. Here it comes. it's coming over here. Oh! I would like to show my thanks to this young chef right here for making these peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Logan, Well, you know, we would be eating oyster stuffing right now - if you didn't bump me over. - Guys, guys. - All right, guys. - How about something-- what is something you might be grateful for, young man? Okay, we haven't heard anything out of that side of the peanut gallery. - Oh, Dad. - Yes, ma'am. - I'm thankful for sports. - Lovely. Oh, cooking. Collecting bugs. Collecting bugs" lovely. What about you? I'm thankful for computers. I'm thankful for computers too. - I'm thankful for bacon bits. - Oh yeah, those are nice. And what about you, Mama? I'm thankful that my daughter has been looking a little happier lately. Aww. Thanks, Mom. I am. I am very thankful as well. In fact, I'm so thankful for how this group has come together so lovingly, I have something very special that I would like to ask your mother. Susan, can you stand up for a second? I think he's gonna do it. Do what? What are you doing? Susan Davis, you have made me happier than I have been in a really long time. I think my daughters can attest to that. And I don't want to stop feeling that way for the rest of my life. Susan Davis, will you make me the happiest man on earth and marry me? Yes, I will. - I love you. - I love you. Well, Cheri, looks like you're stuck with me. Come here, big guy. Ryan. - I'll be right back. - Yeah, it's okay. Hey, buddy. What are you doing over here? Hey, look at me. I know that you're sad, but nobody could ever replace your dad. Jake-- he cares very much about you and your brothers. What are they even talking about? I have no idea. And you dad will always be very special to me. But just think about it-- wouldn't having a man around the house be kind of cool, like maybe some sisters running around? Look, everything's gonna be okay, 'cause you know what? Us getting married is not about just us. It's about having a family. I promise everything's gonna be okay. You'll see. Okay? Let's go eat. Hey. Well, you think the little man's gonna be okay? Yeah. I know he's gonna love you. He just needs time. You know, we don't have to have a huge wedding. No, I think we should. I think it would be good for them. - Okay. - Do you have a date in mind? Yeah. I was thinking Christmas. You're kidding. No. You said it always reminded you of family. Hmm? I can't think of a better way of celebrating the two families coming together. Besides, the kids will be off of school. Everyone's gonna be in town. It'll be perfect. Hmm? - I love you. - I love you too. Oh no. Yeah, they'll be great together. Of course with less than a month to go, things were bound to get interesting. Are you-- are you crazy? - What is the big deal? - We're not getting any younger, come on. Well, are you sure you're ready for this? Of course I'm ready for this. She's sweet. She's smart. She's super motivated. He's considerate and caring, charming, funny. Well, I think the kids needs a male figure in the house, you know. She's gonna be a great influence on the girls. - It'll be perfect. What did the kids say about it? I mean, Ryan didn't seem too happy. How are the girls taking it? 'Cause I'm not taking it very well. Well, it's not gonna happen overnight, that's for sure. Do you know what? I think in the long run it will be the best thing for them. Well, what about me? What about what I want? When you said you were gonna get back on the horse, I didn't expect you -to jump into the Kentucky Derby. - Mom. I don't get it. I don't get it. You just did the whole marriage thing and now you're on the Sea of Tranquility. And there are tons of fish in that sea. And you are talking about settling down when you should be getting down, man. I mean, what's the big rush? Look, we could spend eight months planning this thing out... Or we could just not dwell on it and just get married. Do you watch television? Do you know what a bridezilla is? I do not. All they want is perfect. Please educate me. They want perfect flowers and a perfect dress and perfect perfectness-- perfect perfect. You know what? Perfect perfect-- we're not 25. We don't need some ridiculous wedding. We've been through this already before, both of us have. We don't need that. We just want something simple... And no nonsense... - Intimate... - Little wedding. At least let me handle the music. That's good. We're so good, dude. We have our own Facebook page... - Frank. - ...My space page. We're huge in Germany. No. Come on, man. We just played the Renaissance Faire. And all the knights in the crowd were like, "Arrrgh, thou art fine minstrels." But they didn't sound like pirates when they did it. No. I'll give you a massage. This is a no. - But I love you. - I love you too. This is tough love. No. As long as you're happy, I will support you. - Thanks, Mom. - I'm scared, but I'll support you. Come on. Don't forget, if it wasn't for me, none of this would have happened. I may have the mental capacity of your average two-year-old human, but I couldn't help but notice that the girls weren't exactly thrilled with the idea that their father was getting hitched to this woman. - Hi. - Hi. - May I help you? - Yes. I'm getting married. Congratulations. And my goodness, what beautiful-- - oh honey, honey. - Swing swing. May I say what beautiful daughters you have? They are lovely. Well, you are gonna make a beautiful bride. I mean, my goodness, you have lovely bone structure. And we can find something to accentuate your gorgeous blonde hair. Let's try something on. Okay. You look splendid. - I think it's a little long. - No, it's perfect. You put some heels on-- just right. Yeah. Oh. - I think it's a little too long. - Yeah. Well, what do you think? You look like Tarzan's wife. This is one of my most popular designers. She still looks like Tarzan's wife. Oh. Okay, this is a brand-new one. It just came in today. Now it's floor-length, which is a must, I think. It's got a corseted bodice which shows off your figure perfectly. It's got full support and a neckline that is gonna make that groom's heart flutter. - I think it's a little too sparkly. - I like it. It's pretty cool. Speaking of flutter, is this in dollars? Honey, you can't put a price tag on the most important day of your life. Yeah, but this is a down payment... - it's okay. - ...on a house. We don't need to go to college. Do you have something on sale maybe? I do have some stuff in the back. You're welcome to fish through. Follow me. She shoots. She scores. Hey puppy. Hi. Did you miss me? Oh, you are a good boy. - Hello. - Hi sweetie. I made Santa sugar cookies-- your favorite. Oh yeah, those were my favorite when I was, like, 10. Oh, then I supposed it was Santa and his elves who ate them all last year? Okay, maybe I had a couple. - How did it go at the dress shop? - It was interesting. - Yeah? - Yeah. Okay, that's an understatement. And the girls? I think the girls are about as excited about the wedding as the boys are. Did you really expect otherwise? It's a big change for them. You can't expect them to fall in love with you overnight. I know. They just want to feel safe and secure. They want to know they can count on you. Well, they can. I know, but they need to learn that. Right now they're just probably feeling totally invisible, like they don't have a say. They want to be appreciated and encouraged, you know? I mean, everyone works at their own pace. So just give it time, sweetie. - I'm gonna get that. - Okay. - I'm just gonna-- - I guess you don't like them any more. - Huh-uh. - I'll do crudites, you know, tonight. Hello? So how are things out in the boondocks? Fine. Yeah? Well, I've been in the office all day, busting my hump for you. And I got you an opportunity that I think is gonna make you flip. Oh? Chief Curator of the New York Museum of Contemporary Art. You got nothing! Take that. MOCA? That's right. Isn't that crazy? - That's unbelievable. - Yeah, it's wild, isn't it? The last curator took a similar position at the Louvre. Take that. And here's the luckiest part of all: They're gonna be in Los Angeles tomorrow conducting interviews. Wait, tomorrow? Tomorrow. Isn't that crazy? I was able to call in some favors and pull a few strings and I got you a prime 11:30 slot. Am I good or what? I'll be there. So seriously, I'm asking, am I good or what? Just say it. Um... Okay, I am personally sending you an email... with all the details. Done. Okay, thanks. Wow. Here we go. Come on, she's kicking your butt, tubby. Come on. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. MOCA? Oh my-- Oh, come on, people. Hello. - Hey. - Hi. Where are you? I'm running some errands. What's up? Well, I was just calling to remind you about the coordinators this afternoon. That was today? Okay, what time? 3:00, my office. You know what? I might be a few minutes late. I have to go pick up the kids. Okay. Sounds good. I'll see you then, honey. Bye. I'm actually very traditional. I was thinking white folding chairs and, um-- and some white-- um... I'm highly allergic to dogs and I keep sneezing and it makes me very sick. Yeah, well, I'm allergic to your perfume. Now I'm gonna make your wedding fabulicious. Now I was thinking for decorations, it should be leopard. Rrow! We would have horse-drawn carriages and runners down the aisle. You know what? Let's lose the horses. I think that sounds a little much. Rusty might get jealous. Yeah, my cousin has this great restaurant. The meatballs there are to die for, literally. Be quiet for me one minute, please. I just want to feel the energy of your dogs. Awkward. My energy is creeped out. We'll have a wedding scene look like Santa's workshop. Oh ho ho ho! Well, it's on Christmas, isn't it? Yeah-- no. Yeah, he's going with it. Ho ho ho ho ho! Oh, at the wedding we can tell you how to do everything. We can do "Drop It Like it's Hot." And then we could do booty shake, booty shake, booty shake. Brownies-- brownies for all of your guests. I'm liking this vibe. I really like that. And what's nice about hay bales is they also double as a toothpick. 'Cause you get that meat stuck in there. You just need a little toothpick. You get it out of a hay bale and you just do-- it's perfect. Little elves dancing around the tables. Your poodle can stay because it's hypoallergenic. Of course I am. But the other dog has to go. Do I need to state the obvious? No, I don't think so. Your dogs" they're telling me that they love granola. Running man, running man, running man, running man. She can do a running man while she's coming down the aisle. - Like that? - That's awesome. Everybody has a hootenanny good time. They come on in. They leave. They're married. Well, maybe they don't last long, but it doesn't matter. The wedding was the most fun part of it. See, this is great. We're learning about each other right now as well. Now if you need a preacher, I can be your preacher. I got a Bible for it. Yeah, hello. Wow. If you need a pastor-- ho ho ho-- Santa Claus is licensed to do weddings. So I'm detecting a real-- real Christmas theme here to the wedding. You guys need extra security? 'Cause I know a couple guys. - Really? Really? - That's good. No, that's good. - Well, you know. - Really? I will not come to the wedding if that dog is there. Okay. Lady, I won't come to the wedding if you're there. The way we see it, the bride should be married like a queen and treated like a queen-- with the exception, of course, of a subsequent beheading. Thank you. Lots and lots of doves flying overhead during your vows. Can you train these doves not to poop? No worries. Yeah. Aside from the hippies and the yogis, I would say that went pretty well. Personally I'd go with the Santa Claus guy, because that way there'd be presents at your wedding. I know someone at the dog park-- Pepe. He could probably be an officiant at your wedding, but I'd have to see if his papers are in order. Well, this is where we live. Hey. Are you too busy to give your mom a kiss? How was school? Fine. I'm learning how to make Emeril's fish soup. I need to get the spice portions correct. Mm-hmm. - Can I make it for dinner tonight? - You know, you have homework. - But Mom. - Sorry, it's a school night and you need to get ready for bed so we have time for your multiplication before, okay? You left early this morning. Oh yeah. I had some errands to run before it got too late. How were the coordinators? You know, I think we're gonna end up doing it ourselves. Well, it's your wedding. I saw your letter about the rent. Oh, don't worry about that. Of course I'm gonna worry about it, Mom. You said things were bad, but you didn't say they were this severe. Things have been a little hard since your father died, but I'll be fine. Do not worry about it, okay? Okay. Where's Ryan? He's over there. I caught him looking through Paul's things earlier today. You go on upstairs and rest. I'll make dinner. Okay. Hey, buddy. You all right? How was it today? Did you play soccer at lunch? -- Where are you guys going? - I don't have it. - Josh. So while the idea of a Christmas wedding day might have sounded fun and special, they were about to learn it presented one teensy little problem. I heard back from the Congregational Church, the Baptist Church and the Presbyterians. They're all busy with their Christmas services and the restaurants are closed. - Something's got to be open. - Yeah, there is-- Chang's House of Dim Sum and Donuts. - Oh, I love their shrimp toast. - I love their crullers. So this is our only option? Yeah, and for $150 it'd better be a good one. Ay-yi-yi. - No no no no no no. No no no. No dogs allowed. Oh, we have an appointment. Jake Campbell and Susan Davis. - We had an appointment with Howard? - Hank. Hillary Spaulding. And no animals are allowed on the premises. No dogs? Ouch. Oh. I assure you they'll be well-behaved. Clearly this lady does not know us. - Yes, I know. - That's what they all say. But I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "I can leave a nice little present on the fairway." Yeah, too late. And won't the greens keeper just love that? We were actually hoping that the dogs could participate in the ceremony. Yes. See, they're the reason we met. So no dogs" no ceremony. No $150 a plate. Well, then welcome to the Los Olives Country Club. Pleasure. If it's a nice, quiet, romantic ceremony that you're looking for, I believe you've come to the right place. But let me show you some options. I'll get another golf cart over there. After you. - Thank you. - Thank you. And if you lift a leg, you're done. I think this lady needs a few days in obedience school. I really think you're gonna love the facilities, yes. The banquet facilities are world class. Our chef is world-renowned. And you're gonna love the catering. Hey, Rust, what are you-- what are you thinking of me hitching up with your mom? Is that all right? Oh, there's a bridal suite too, if you need to get ready beforehand. It's fabulous. It's so pretty. Isn't it pretty, honey? Yeah, it's gorgeous. No, you're not gonna see anything like it for miles around, I assure you. Oh my, is that what I think it is? Ignore him, Rusty. He's just a stray. it's another dog! Let's get him! - Rusty, no. Get back here. - Whoa whoa whoa. - Oh. - Oh. Why are you guys chasing me? Just get him. Hey. - No! - Guys, wait up. Now I got you. - Aha! Now I'm gonna chase you. - Don't chase me. Rusty, listen to me. Stop it. I'm gonna get you. I'm gonna get-- whoa! I know. Goodness. - You guys both go sit. - Okay, just go. - Sit down. - Stay. Relax. We'll talk to you later. I can't believe she's gonna let us have the event at the country club - after all that. That was madness. - I know. I know. Wow, there's nobody here. - Is it always this quiet? - Yeah, it's a ghost town. I remember when my mom and dad opened this place, there were antique stores up and down the street. Now they're all tasting rooms. - Oh. We're the enemy? - Mm-hmm. - Look out. - Hi. Crazy lady carrying blankets. She's behind on her rent. - She's cuckoo. - Is she really? I don't know how much longer she can keep this place going. You just gotta figure out how to get some butts in this place. How do you do that? I have no idea how to sell antiques. Well, then why don't we get them in here some way you do know, I don't know, like-- - oh. - What? What oh? Do something you know. Do something you love. You are a genius. Do something with Christmas. - That is a great idea. - Oh, heads up. Heads up. Oh. - Oh. hi. - Hi. Oh, sorry. Hi. I didn't know you guys were here. Hey, do you need a hand? No. Okay, here we go. That day they got to work on a plan to grab the tourists' attention. The new family came together and chipped in to make sure it was perfect. Oh, I just love a man who's handy. I built a birdhouse once with my own two paws. ? It's Christmas time, it's Christmas time again ? ? The stockings are hung and the tree is trimmed ? ? The sounds of the season are ringing on in ? ? it's Christmas time, it's Christmas time again ? ? Well, me and my baby by the mistletoe ? ? Boy, don't you know? ? ? She'll be so happy ? ? When Santa comes tonight ? ? it's Christmas time, it's Christmas time again. ? Go. Go. - Here you go. Merry Christmas. - You'd better go. ? A-one, two, three, four, one ? ? Silent night ? ? Holy night... ? Well, they do have a certain je-ne-sais-quoi. ? All is bright ? ? Round yon Virgin ? ? Mother and Child, Holy Infant... ? I know they're your friends, but no. Uh-uh. ? So tender and mild... ? - Wow. - Oh no, he's coming at me. ? Sleep in heavenly peace... ? Oh brother. ? Sleep in heavenly peace. ? Well, at least we're getting the worst out of the way first, - I think. - You think? Ja. Hello. Testing. Is the micro-- - No. - Uh, no. Go like this. - No. - No. ? Here comes the bride, here comes the bride... ? I didn't even know that note existed. ? Jingle bells ? ? How I love you, oh ? ? Jingle bells ? ? How I need you... ? - Make it stop. Make it stop. - I can't breathe. Make it stop. ? On a one-horse open sleigh ? ? Over the fields we-- ? ? Laughing all the way... ? - Okay, that's it. - .' Jingle bells... .' Wait, they're gonna do a Journey medley. Don't you want to hear that? - Susan, come on. Honey, they're not-- - No. No, I'm done. That's it. Having sampled the highlights of the Los Olives indie music scene, it was time to move on to the next element of the wedding. And after her delightful picnic with the Campbell girls, Susan thought it might be a good idea for her boys to spend some time with their new stepfather. - Who's hungry for cake? - I do, I do, I do. I want to try some cake, Whoo-hoo! Do we have to? Joshua Edward Davis, get out of this car right now. Okay, come on. Wow. And you two are staying in here until we're ready to go. And if you're good, I'll get you a treat on the way back. I had to admit, more and more I was really liking this guy. Ryan, don't you want to come see some wedding cakes, honey? Okay. Let me handle this. Hey, buddy. So you're not so thrilled about your mom and I getting engaged, huh? I get it. I think my daughters would agree with you. And I know that you're missing your dad. Right? I want you to know I miss someone a lot too. Madison and Emma's mama was a really special lady and I miss her a lot. I really do. But your dad-- I'm not trying to replace him. I couldn't. It'd be impossible. What I can do is I can help him. I can help him take care of you, take care of your brothers and help look after your mom a little bit. And one thing I'll guarantee you is that I won't leave you. He said that too. Hey. What do you say, let's go in and get some cake? ? Joy to the world, the Lord is come... ? Wow, it smells good in here, right? - Yeah. - What do they have here? - Ooh. - Whoa. Bakery. Come on. I think over here maybe. What do you think? My heart cries out for the piece of fondant on display here. - He is nine, isn't he? - Yeah. - Hi, folks. How are you? - How can I help you? Good. We're getting married. Congratulations. Have you thought about what kind of cake you might like? Not really. I mean, we're here. It's about as far as we've gotten. Flavors? - I was thinking angel food. - Like a red velvet. - Okay, lemon coconut. - Raspberry cream. Or-- Or lemon raspberry coconut cream. Okay, I think we have some work to do. Why don't I go get us some books to look at? Thank you. Good. All right, we're gonna rock-paper-scissors for this. - All right, you're on. - Red velvet. What are you? Um, lemon. - Hey, where are you going? - I smell something. Can't you just wait patiently? - Hold on. - Is that-- is that-- is that tiramisu or a cappuccino torte? You are going to get us in so much trouble. - Is it gonna look good? - Or taste good. All right, here we go. Here are some samples for you. Now I'd like to explain each of these in detail, if I may. First of all, we have the-- oh, not-- Just wait. Wait wait just a second. Okay, this is the sour cream fudge with swirled marble. I find the sour cream fudge particularly playful. Food Network. We have the vanilla French butter cream. If you could just wait and let me explain. That's good. This is-- this is not gonna be a helpful-- - They're hungry. Sorry. - Right. I just want-- - Guys. - There's a detail that should-- Rusty, get back here. - I just want to get a closer look. - Maybe they got samples in the dumpster. Oh, that's disgusting. Come on. isn't that the most beautiful thing you've ever seen in your whole life? You're only three. Yeah, but that's 21 in dog years. - That didn't go so well. - Okay, can I try some? - Come to Rusty. Oh. - Rusty! What was that? Oh gosh, that's so good. What was that? What is-- what is-- what is going on?! What? How did you get in here?! You get out of here! Get out of my bakery! Get out of here, you! Argh! Furry, mangy, pile of fleas, you get back here! Are those your animals? Do you have any idea what they have done to my kitchen, to my cake? They've ruined a $2500 cake! Okay, you get to go upstairs and go to bed. Go to bed. Hi. Everything okay? Oh yeah, other than the fact that Rusty ran through the kitchen of the bakery and destroyed everything, everything is great. Hey, it's Pat again. I have some fantastic news. Call me immediate-- - Pat Blake. - Hey, it's Susan. Susan, what have you been doing? I've been waiting here in my office all day for you to call me back. I was out walking the dog. I thought you'd like to know that I had a very interesting conversation with Mr. Bob Martinez over at MOCA. And? Are you sitting down? I am. - You got the position! - You're kidding me. No. He said you're by far the best candidate for the job. That's incredible. I-- Chief Curator, New York City. It's exactly what you wanted. Yeah, I don't know what to say. How about "Yeah"? How about, "You're amazing, Pat. And nobody else could have done this for me, Pat." Listen, they're sending the contract over right now. I'm gonna have the lawyers take a peek at it. All I need from you is a commitment to start on the 1st. I'll even book your flight out on the 26th. Oh, that's the day after Christmas. Well, you want time to get settled or organized or whatever you do. The kids probably need a school to go to. Right, yeah. Of course. What's the big deal? It's just it's short notice is all. Well, when you live life in the fast lane like you are, Susan, you gotta hold on tight. This is exactly what you've been waiting for. I want to hear a celebration. I want to hear excitement. I want to hear jumping for joy. Are you even jumping? No, I am. I've met someone. Actually I've more than met someone. I'm engaged to be married. What? Why'd you go and do something silly like that for? Yeah, it just happened on Thanksgiving. We are going to be getting married on December 25th. Listen, can I give you a little piece of advice? Because I've been married four and a half times. - Half? - It was an annulment. It was a stupid Vegas thing. Whatever. I know a thing or two about marriage. Listen to me. This whirlwind-romance- spur-of-the-moment stuff is fake. it's not real. It doesn't exist. It's a movie. Do you understand? It feels pretty real to me. Fine. Then get married to Mr. Mayberry and spend the rest of your life living in a small town working at your mom's shop, because that's what you're gonna be doing if you marry this guy. That's gonna be your life. Or go to New York City, the job of your dreams-- running the second-biggest art museum on the East Coast. You deserve this position. And I would hate to see it go to somebody else, Susan. I know. Yeah. Listen, give me 24 hours to think about it, okay? You got 12. Marriage. Disgusting. You know, you were made for that job. Yeah, you can tell him that I'll give him another 5% off, but tell him that I know that he knows that I know that he's already getting a good deal. Yeah, you guys are our best customers. Don't worry about it. Hey, let me call you back. To what do I owe the pleasure? Welcome. - How's Rusty? - Grounded. I'll bet. Can we talk for a minute? Sure, yeah. Let's go inside. It's getting chilly out here. New York? Yeah. I've been wanting something like this. It's a tremendous opportunity. MOCA is one of the biggest museums in the country. How did they find you? I mean, who hires someone without an interview? - You interviewed. - I did. It was the day that we met with the coordinators. L-- they were in LA and I went down. You went down to LA for an interview? I didn't think anything would come of it. - And you didn't tell me? - No, I didn't-- I didn't want to worry you. I didn't-- Oh yeah, so you just lied about it. That's so much better. Okay, wait, did you never think that I was gonna work again? Of course not, but I thought these were the kinds of things we could discuss... - Yes, we are. - ...that we could be open about them. That's what I'm doing. I'm here talking to you about it. I want you to come to New York with me. I can't just leave here. This is the only home that my kids know. Their friends are here. Their school is here. I understand, but they can make new friends. That's what kids do. This place has been in my family for 40 years-- 40 yea rs. There's nothing more important than family. And besides, I thought we had a good thing here. What about your mom's store? What about that? 'Cause she took pity on me and gave me a place to live? I mean, I have worked my entire life, Jake, ever since I graduated from high school. I put myself through college. I got two master's degrees-- to end up here? This is not me. This was never meant to be permanent for me. I am not a small-town person. You have this. You have the winery. What do I have? What defines me other than mom? Wife? I didn't mean that. Jake-- No, I know exactly what you mean. You know, when I told everyone that I wanted to marry you, they said, "Slow down. You're moving too fast. You don't know her well enough." And I told them I knew exactly who you were and that you were exactly the person I've been looking for since my wife died. I guess I didn't know you at all. Jake. You know, I'm just gonna go back to this place that can do without me, okay? ? You can't control ? ? The way of the world, so ? ? Live in the moment ? ? With love in your heart... ? Unfortunately, no one knew what to do, but they couldn't shake the feeling that they'd rushed into this and maybe it was a mistake. I worked my whole life for this job, you know? I know you did, baby. You'd think he'd be more understanding. I hate to say it, but I told you so. I know. I know. it's like when we make a bottle of wine. First you've got to cultivate and grow the grapes. Then you've got to check the sugar content to make sure you're harvesting them at the right time. Then you ferment them. You age it for months, and then you bottle it. You'd think maybe he would see what a great opportunity this is. Well, he lives here. His kids' home is here. And then, and only then, you know you have the perfect bottle of wine. I thought I had the perfect bottle. Have you thought about staying? Of course, but-- But what? It's good money, Mom. If I took this job, I wouldn't have to worry any more. Well, it sounds like you've made up your mind. It's not my decision. She's the one leaving. Have you told her how you feel? Of course I have. I want him to come. I haven't been this happy in a long time, but I can't just pack up and leave all this to go out East. I'm not gonna do it, Frank. I can't. I'm gonna call Pat. I'm going to accept the position. ? Never forget ? ? This bliss ? ? Mark this day ? ? With a kiss... ? -- .' It doesn't get .' ? Better than this ? ? I can't imagine ? ? Better than this ? ? I can't imagine... ? Mommy? Yeah, baby, what's up? You two should be together. You think so? Everything's gonna be okay. Don't worry. I love you, Mommy. I love you too. Come on. ? Never forget ? ? This bliss ? ? Mark this day ? ? With a kiss ? ? It doesn't get ? ? Better than this ? ? I can't imagine ? ? Better than this ? ? I can't imagine ? ? Soon all of our memories, frozen in time ? ? Get lost in the shadows of days gone by ? ? But you never forget when the timing is right ? ? So mark this day ? - .' With a kiss .' - .' All of our memories .' ? Frozen in time ? - .' Mark this day .' - .' Get lost in the shadows .' ? Of days gone by ? - .' With a kiss .' - .' But you never forget .' ? When the moment is right ? ? Mark this day ? ? With a kiss... ? Yes, I will. It really hurt to see her like this. I knew how much Jake meant to her. I also knew how she felt, having to move back in with her mom at that age. Independence is important. But she wasn't the only one upset. I know. I don't know what we're gonna do. - Hey, Daddy. - Hello. Love you. Hey, sweetheart. - Daddy. - Yeah? What's gonna happen to Susan? Mm, have a seat. Let me talk to you guys for a second. So Susan got a really nice job opportunity and she's moving to New York. Why does she have to leave? It's complicated, honey. I thought she wanted to be our mommy. I didn't know that it mattered so much to you two. It did to you. And we want you to be happy. And now Cheri doesn't have Rusty any more. See? Hmm. Come here, give me a hug. - Love you guys. - Love you, Daddy. We're gonna be okay. - Yeah, you too, come here, girl. - Yeah, come here. - Come on, honey. Yeah. - Good girl. We had five days left, and there wasn't a moment to lose. Cheri and I had to come up with a plan, and fast. - Rusty. - Come on, Rusty. Come on, Rusty, stop playing around. - Stop playing around. - Rusty, come back! - Mom's gonna kill us. - Not if we catch him first. Rusty! Rusty! Rusty, come on, get back here. Rusty, come back! Rusty, Rusty! What's she doing? Now you have got to come with me. It's important. Why is she even here? There's no dogs allowed in the tree house. I think she wants us to follow her. I guess that's why she's barking. Here, you go first. Cheri! - Cheri! Rusty! - Cheri, get over here! So what are you doing here? Following Cheri. What are you doing here? I don't know. Rusty brought us here. Right, your dog just happened to bring you here at the same time we're here? - He did. - Are you calling us liars? Maybe. What are you gonna do about it? You're the ones moving to New York anyway. It's not like you couldn't come. Please, if she really cared, she wouldn't go. Then you shouldn't make it sound like it's all her fault. Quiet! Stop arguing. He's right. It's not about whose fault it is. It's about what we're gonna do about it. My mom loves your dad. And your dad loves her. So the question is how are we gonna make sure that they still get married? I think we need some extra help on this one. Let's go. Emma was right. It was time to bring in the big guns. And there was only one person in the whole town who could possibly fix the situation. Okay, guys, it's safe. Come on. Okay, so what's the plan? One of us has got to go over there and tell him what we want for Christmas. - The wedding. - Exactly. - So how do we pick who does it? - Okay, we've got one shot at this. Who's the one person he can't possibly say no to? - Me? - Just trust us. Well, hello, children. What are your names? Look, I know you're not the real Santa, but that's okay. Your secret's safe with me. But I do know that you're his helper, so I was wondering if you could ask him a favor. Well, Santa's pretty busy this time of year, but I'm sure he can do something. What's your favor? Well, my brothers and I and the girls over there-- we'd like to get our parents back together for Christmas. They were supposed to get married Christmas Day, but now they're not. Can you help them? Hmm. Well, that's a lovely Christmas wish. And don't you want something for yourself, say, a video game or a bike? No, this is all I want. Can you help? Well, it's a pretty tall order, but I'll tell you what: Elf Herbert, bring me one of those flyers, please. This is Elf Herbert. Thank you, Elf Herbert. You get them to come to this and Santa's gonna see what he can do, okay? Okay. Now you make sure you get them there by noon. Got it. And you kids, you all have a wonderful Christmas. - Merry Christmas, Santa. - Merry Christmas. Now on your way. Santa's got work to do. Merry Christmas, children. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Oops. I'm coming, I'm coming. - Ho ho ho! - Welcome all to the annual - Ho ho ho! - Welcome all to the annual Los Olives Christmas Fair! Girls, what do you want to do? I want to go to the stage, Dad. You want to go to the stage? You want to listen to music? - Yeah, come on. - Let's go over, come on. - Okay. - Come on. Come on, we're gonna miss the performance. All right, all right, we're going. We're going. I mean, like, isn't this something? They do it every year. They've got music. They've got games. I even think they have a couple of reindeer over there by the petting zoo. - What about dogs? - Somebody pet me. Okay, let's get this over with, come on. Uh, you know, I know things are difficult right now. But promise me you'll try to have a good time -for the boys' sake. - I promise. Okay okay. - Hey, Jake, you made it. - Hey. - Can we go play? - Yeah, I'm gonna look around. - Okay, all right. Don't go far. - Yeah, come on. See you later. Bye. What are you doing here? You're looking at the main attraction. We go on in five. Stop it. Are you playing here? Just because we weren't good enough to play at your wedding doesn't mean that we're not good enough to rock this house. - How are you, gentlemen? - Hey, Father. - Reverend, how are you? - Good to see you. Frank, do you have a moment? I just need to speak with you. - Lead the way, Padre. - Excuse us, Jake. - Uh, yeah. - I'll see you in a little bit. ? Tra Ia Ia Ia Ia ? ? La Ia Ia Ia. ? Thank you, everybody. Thank you. We're gonna play another Christmas carol for you, but before we do that I'd like to make a dedication to two very special people in the audience. Jake, Susan, this is for you. ? Silent night ? ? Holy night ? ? Allis calm ? ? All is bright ? ? Round yon virgin... ? Well, it looks like they want us to dance. I'm not sure that's a good idea. Come on, it's Christmas. ? So tender and mild... ? You know these past few days that we've been apart - have been kind of hard. - .' Sleep in heavenly peace... .' Don't. it's okay. No no, I-- I have to. ? In heavenly peace... ? I feel like I'm all alone. I feel like I'm missing a huge piece of me that I-- I feel like I've just lost it. But I didn't lose it. Not yet. It's still here. I don't want to spend any more of my life without you. And I'll do anything to prevent that. Look, the girls are miserable and Cheri is crying every night. Yeah, the boys have been pretty upset too. I didn't think it would be this hard. I miss you. If you want, we'll go to New York with you. You know what? I'm kind of starting to like it here. What about your job? There'll be other jobs. There's only one you. Susan Davis, will you still marry me? Yeah. Yes. Are you guys gonna get married or what? You'd better. It's Christmas. Do it. You guys. You guys. Hey, Jake, we haven't rocked out in a while. Get up here. Come on, get up here. Let's do this. All right. ? Jingle bells, jingle bells ? ? Jingle all the way ? ? Oh, what fun it is to ride ? ? In a one-horse open sleigh ? ? Jingle bells, jingle bells ? ? Jingle all the way ? ? Oh, what fun it is to ride ? ? In a one-horse open sleigh... ? Guys, come on. ? Dashing through the snow ? ? In a one-horse open sleigh ? ? O'er the field we go ? ? Laughing all the way, ha ha ha ? ? Bells on bobtails ring ? ? Making spirits bright ? ? What fun it is to laugh and sing ? ? A sleighing song tonight... ? Are they really gonna sing the whole thing? I think so. ? Jingle all the way ? ? Oh, what fun it is to ride ? ? In a one-horse ? ? Open sleigh. ? ? The first Noel the angels did say ? ? Was to certain poor shepherds ? ? In fields as they lay ? ? In fields where they ? ? Lay keeping their sheep ? ? On a cold winter's night ? ? That was so deep ? ? Noel, Noel... ? - Pat Blake. - Hi Pat. it's Susan. Well, it's about time. Where have you been? I've been holding MOCA off all day. I re-read your contract though and I gotta tell you, you're getting a heck of a deal. I would like you to tell them, "Thank you very much for the offer," but I'm going to pass. Susan, I'm sorry, hold on. We must have a bad connection, 'cause it sounded like you just said you were passing. I did. Okay, Susan, I want you to listen to me. I know how these small towns are. They get inside of you like one of those parasites-- when you go to a country, and they say "Don't drink the water" but you drink it anyway. 'Cause that's what's happening here, Susan. I need you to be rational. Everything you've ever worked for, I'm getting you-- New York City, MOCA. This is the big time, honey. I know. You're right. It is everything I've been working for, but I've been working for the wrong things. I get it. it's the money. You know, I had a feel-- okay, you just give me a number and I'll go back to them and I'll get you your money. Family is the most important thing. An expense account? A company car. A company car. No, a longer lunch, of course, so you can spend time with your family. - No, not interested. - You tell me what you're looking for. I will go back to them. I promise I'll get it. Not unless they will move the museum to Los Olives. That could be difficult. Thanks, Pat. Bye. I gotta check this Los Olives out. Do not put your butt on my couch! Of course now there was the challenge of putting everything back together at a moment's notice. And if there's one thing Jake and Susan loved, it was a challenge. The country club gave away the room for a Christmas party. Guys, guys, settle down for a second here. The caterer's booked. The officiant went to Maui. And our florist has been booked by a charity event, which is kind of irrelevant, because it's too late for them to get the flowers that we wanted anyway. Okay, well, what about the cake? She said something about a restraining order and then hung up. And the tuxedo guys is closed until New Year's anyway. We can just wait. We don't have to do it on Christmas. We can call a justice of the peace. Look, I promised my bride-to-be a Christmas wedding. And that is exactly what you're going to get. You're sweet. I promise, All right. Hey hey hey, guys, guys. Finally the big day had arrived. - Merry Christmas. - Santa came. Come on, wake up. We've got to go open presents. - Come on, come on, Mom. - Come on, Mom. - Rusty. Rusty. - Where's Grandma? - Come on, Rusty. Come on. - Five more minutes. - No, now. Come on. - No, come on, now. - All right. - Rusty wants you to. You are crazy, boys. - Move it, move it, move it. - Come on, go go go. - Look, Santa came. - Nice. Oh my gosh. Yay! Here we go. - Oh boy, a bone. - That's mine, yep. Merry Christmas, girls. - Come here, honey. - Cool. This is awesome. - Sweet. - Daddy, it's my bunny. Aw, look at that. it's the bear you always wanted, but you never got it for Christmas. This is. How did you know I wanted it? This is for me too. - I got a frog. - A frog? - Look at it. - What? ? 'Tis the season to be jolly ? ? Fa Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia Ia ? ? Fa Ia Ia Ia Ia ? ? La Ia Ia ? ? La. ? My client does not even get out of bed for less than 250K per year plus stock options. That's his bare minimum. Take it or leave it. - Excuse me, sir. - Excuse me, excuse me. Sir, I'm sorry, you're gonna have to get off the phone. The ceremony is gonna begin any minute. - We're gathering the-- - I will. I'm going there. - The bride comes right through here. - Excuse me. Thank you, Reverend. Yes yes, thank you, thank you. I'm off. I'm off. I'm off. Go. Are you still there? Oh, yeah yeah yeah. Of course I'm always in my office. Yes. Deal or no deal? - Deal? Deal? Deal? Deal? Done. - Excuse me, sir. - There you go. Relax. - Please take your seat, sir! What side is the bride's family on? Thank you, Your Honor. - All right, are we all ready to go? - Yes. - How do I look? - You look beautiful, Mommy. You look great. And I just want you to know that I'm willing to share my room if I have to. Oh, you're the best. Are you okay? I'm just so very happy for you. Oh, thank you. - I love you. - I love you too. - Okay. - Okay. Let's get going. We mustn't keep people waiting, must we? Fly fly fly. Come on, let's go. - Yes, we can. - I love you. - Reverend. - Jake. Come on, hurry up. Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in the presence of these witnesses to join Susan Davis and Jake Campbell in holy matrimony. I looked forward to this moment since the day I first laid eyes on her. I knew Cheri was the girl for me and part of me actually wanted to pinch myself just to make sure it was actually happening. Of course without opposable thumbs I couldn't really pinch myself, but still it was too good to be true. But that's not all that came over me that day. It had been a long time since I saw Susan smile like that. I knew that just as much as Cheri and I were destined to be together, so were they. If I had tear ducts, I would cry. May I have the rings? Do you, Jake, take Susan to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for as long as you both shall live? I do. And do you, Susan, take Jake to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, for as long as you both shall live? I do. By the powers vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Jake, you may now kiss your bride. I know her. Ladies and gentlemen, may I present Mr. and Mrs. Jake Campbell? ? When the Christmas lights ? ? Are twinkling ? ? And the glistening snow ? ? Has fallen ? ? Sleigh bells keep... ? Nice service, Rabbi. I couldn't help but notice your sparkling personality and a winning public speaking ability. And I said to myself, "Pat Blake--" that's me-- "that guy needs a headhunter." Check it out. Give me a call. We'll do beautiful things together, me and you. Why, thank you so much. I believe this belongs to you. Oh, germs. And I do have some people I need to say hello to. Well, you do that. You say hello to them. Do your thing. - Thank you so much. Lovely meeting you. - It's great to meet you. ? For a Christmas dance with you... ? Logan's cooking went without a hitch. Several guests, well, acknowledging they'd never had a marshmallow peanut butter fudge wedding cake before, said it was the best they'd ever had. He even had a small non-chocolate version for those of us who are chocolate-intolerant. Finally there was the garter toss, a bouquet toss, and it was time to go. You know what that smell is? Money. Right, that's the smell of money. I see this place. I see why Susan likes it here. 'Cause that valley is pure. And you know what that valley needs? - One thing. One thing only. - No. Exactly. Condos. All over the place-- condos. Get rid of the green stuff. Oh man. We're gonna like living here. All right, you've stood by me enough. Please. Please. ? We could trip the light fantastic ? ? In the clouds where reindeer frolic... ? And so that's the story of the Christmas wedding. Everything worked out in the end. The family came together. And, as it turned out, Los Olives was in need of someone with a little bit of art knowledge. And here we all are-- two parents, one in-law, three boys, two girls... And two dogs. All living under one roof. And I suppose you're expecting me to say "They all lived happily ever after," right? - But they did. - Yeah, they do now, but not at first. Someday I'm gonna have to tell you the story of what happened when they all first moved in together. - Oh, and the family honeymoon. - Yeah, who could forget? Trust me, folks, you don't want to miss that one. ? And the glistening snow ? ? Has fallen ? ? Sleigh bells keep ? ? A perfect rhythm for ? ? A Christmas dance ? ? With you ? ? A Christmas dance ? ? With you ? ? With you ? ? With you. ? |
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