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Come to Daddy (2019)
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Dad, it's me, Norval. Uh, I got your letter. Your letter asking me to come and see you. Well... here I am. It's me. Norval. - Mm. - Okay. Jesus Christ. I never thought I'd see you again. Well, you wanna come in? Yes, please. Welcome to my house. I like it. You don't. I do. Why? Uh, it's like a UFO from the 1960's. A UFO from the 1960's. Yeah. A UFO from the 1960's. Exactly. That's brilliant. Yeah. When did I last see you, son? I don't know. Oh, come on. How long's it been? A long time. A long time, yeah. Too long. Too fucking long. God damn. Yeah. Mm. Yeah. Let's get you unpacked. Hey. Let's get a picture of us. You know, a selfie photo? You can show it to your mom when you get home. Oh. No, no. You gotta get the sea in there. - Come on, here. - Uh, careful. That's a limited edition gold phone, designed by Lorde. Lorde? never heard of him. It's real gold. There we go. How about that, huh? Okay. Smile. Oh, shit. - Well... - Fuck. Well, I should've never had that second beer for breakfast. There are only twenty of those phones in the world. Yeah. No. Now there's nineteen. So, how's your mother? Not great, actually. Oh? She ever talk about me? Not really. You live with her? Yeah, it's a temporary arrangement. You don't feel embarrassed about that? Living with your mom? At your age? I don't know. I've had a rough few years. She helped me get me back on my feet. It's complicated. You sleep with her? What? Do you share a bed with your mom? No. Yeah. - Wine? - No, thanks. Oh, go on. Have a drink with your old man. I... I don't drink. No? Why is that? I've had what's called "alcohol dependency issues". Yeah? And that is, uh... It's when you're dependent on alcohol. I nearly... I wrote a note, I ran a bath... I came close. Really fucking close. Anyway, here I am. I survived. Mm-hmm. Hmm. Mm, wow. Tempted? No. So, Dad... what do you do? For work? I'm retired. What did you do before you retired? I realize I know nothing about you. Boy. Your mom, she really doesn't talk about me, does she? I was a limo driver. Yeah, I drove a big black limousine. With a fridge in the back... real leather seats. It was an award-winning limousine. I've been in a few limousines myself. I'm in the music business. Okay. I'm fairly big in the music business. Oh, I bet you are. What are you? A singer or something? Well... I'm not someone you can pigeonhole, if I'm completely honest. Do I DJ? Yes. Do I produce blazing beats? Yes. Do I tinkle the ivories? Yes. Do I promote high-profile events pertaining to music and the performance of music? Yes. Okay. I'm close to some pretty big names. Substantial names, actually. I count Kendrick Lamar and Chance the Rapper among my closest allies. Anyone I've actually heard of? Uh, Elton John is a close friend. His real name is Reginald Kenneth Dwight. Elton... Reginald discovered me. He saw me DJing at a nightclub. It was a gala event, and I was the DJ. He signed me to an exclusive deal. We inked the deal that same night. Elton... Uh, Reginald... ...he's a great man. You could say he's like a father to me. No offence. Boy, I'll tell you. It's a small world. I just happen to be a close friend of Reginald's too. - You are? - Yeah. - You're lying. - I'm not. - You are. - I'm really not. No. Reginald and I, oh, we go way back. Really? I was his personal limo driver for 10 years. Yeah. We spent a decade together. Reginald and I, driving, drinking, talking. We became close friends. Now, what are the odds that you would be close friends with him too? Yeah. Small world. - So, anyway... - I'll tell you what... What? Let's call him. - Reginald? - Yeah. It'll blow his fucking mind. Are you kidding? Brian and Norval, his old pals just happen to be father and son, oh. - Incredible. - Uh, I don't know, Dad. It... It's late. He goes to bed early. Bullshit. He's a card-carrying night owl, and he never shuts up about it. He told me to never call him after 8:00. Well, he told me to call him any time, night or day. Dad, please, don't call him. Please. Don't call him, Dad. Please! You don't really know Elton John, do you? Do you? Uh... No. I... I don't really know Elton John. As a matter of fact, neither do I. But I'm glad we've established that you're full of shit. Just so you know, if you want to impress me, I like fight stories. You ever been in a fight? No. I have. I once accidentally kicked a guy's ear off. I didn't mean to, but the fucker flew off. I could see right into his skull. Night. Jethro. Well, what you want me to do? Oh, fuck you. Let me talk here. No, come on. That's not... You know we can use him as fucking leverage. We've got some collateral. Oh, I have your permission? Well then... Shit. Wait a minute. Dad, can I ask you something? Why did you ask me to come here? You sent me a letter asking me to come. But... now I'm here and you seem like you'd rather I wasn't. It's like you regret sending that letter. Maybe I'm wrong. Am I wrong? I've got to take a crap. Then, let's go for a swim. Mom. Hey. Yeah, yeah. Okay. How are you? Oh, that's great. I don't know. It's harder than I thought. He's not how I imagined him. Not at all. Uh, I don't think he sees many people. Maybe he's not used to having people around. I'm sure it will get easier. Yeah. I mean, who knows. Maybe we'll end up being best friends. No, he's fuckin' dead. He's dead. Well, he's fuckin' dead. No. I don't want to be a fucking babysitter. Mm. Dad. Dad? Yeah. I need to know why you sent that letter. Give it a rest. Dad, I came all this way. No. I don't want to discuss it. This is hard for me too, you know. Fucking drop it. I don't want to fucking drop it. What did you say to me? - I said... - You said? I said, I don't want to fucking drop it. You watch how you talk to me, boy. You asked me to come here. Here I am. Yeah? - And? - And... you have some explaining to do. Like what? You walked out on us when I was five. Thirty years later you ask me to come and see you. Here... here I am. I came here because I assumed that at some point you were going to explain yourself. I don't have to explain myself to you. I disagree. Do you? Yeah. What the fuck are you gonna do about it? What the fuck are you gonna do about it? Hmm? I know what's happening. Yeah? Trust me. You got no fucking idea what's happening here. I think I do. Oh, fuck off. You wrote that letter when you were drunk. You probably don't even remember sending it. Fuck off. You're a drunk. That's all you are. A useless drunk. - You can't handle your booze. - You can't handle being a dad. Oh. I've been trying so fucking hard to like you... but it's impossible. You're impossible. Fuck off. You fuck off. No! You fuck off! You're a rat fucker. You stuff rats up your vagina. You dress like a woman, yeah? You dress like a cunt. - Please, don't call me that. - Then why? You're very cunty. - Don't say that. - Oh! Well, I call a spade a spade, and a cunt a cunt. And you, sir, are a certified cunt. Did you really think that I would be impressed with your fucking Elton John story? Only a cunt would think that. Cunt! - Cunt! - Please, don't push me. Oh, yeah, what? What? - I'll leave. - Oh, no. No, you're not going anywhere. I think I might just go. Yeah. Well, you'd get lost in the woods and die. And they'd find a rat skeleton inside your pelvic bone where your vagina was. You'd love that, wouldn't you, Dad? Oh, fuck. You'd love it if I was dead. Oh, God. Fucking damn it! Dad! What the fuck are you doing? I believe the correct term is filicide. Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Come on. Oh, come here, you little rat fucker! - Come here. Come to Daddy! - Please, please don't do this. I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry. Where's the fucking gratitude here, huh? I thought you wanted to die. I... I didn't. I don't. No, no. Please, Dad, don't do this. Die! No. Dad? Dad? Mom, it's me. N... No. L... Listen to me. It's Dad. He... He's... I... I think he just died. H... He just fell down. He just fell down and stopped breathing. We... we had an argument, and... and he just died. Friday? Um, okay. I'll see you Friday. Okay. Yep. Okay. I... I'll do that. Coroner's office, please. My dad's just died. And there wasn't any, like, um, struggle and stuff? No. No. Like I said, he... He seemed fine. And... And he said his chest hurt. He fell down... Do you promise you're telling me the truth? No. You can't just nod. You've got to say it out loud. I promise I'm telling the truth. You know something? I believe you. You don't have raisin eyes. - What? - Yeah, I'm kind of breaking the fourth wall here, but, uh... I got this theory. Bad guys have eyes that look like raisins. You know, small and dark, you know? But you don't have raisin eyes. No. I... I don't. Ooh. Tell you something, though. Your daddy... he did have raisin eyes. Come to Daddy. That's just my hallucinations on the subject of bad guys and their eyes. Yeah. Coroner will take it from here. Yeah, I'm... I'm sorry about your dad and stuff, you know. Take it easy, I guess. Drink lots of water. I can burp on command if that might cheer you up. No, that's okay. Okay. I don't think I liked him. Really? He called me a rat fucker. Amongst other things. Good thing he's dead then. Is that a really bad thing to say? I don't know. Yeah? Sorry. So, I'm gonna take him away, embalm him, drain the blood from his body, inject him with a preservative, so he doesn't go off, and then bring him back here. What? Oh, there is a storage issue in town at the moment from the flooding. Did you hear about that? No. He'll need to be here while your family makes arrangements. He'll be in a black bag. You won't have to look at him. Has anyone ever told you... Told me what? You have kind eyes. No. No one has ever said that to me. Never? Not that I remember. Well, you do. They're big and they're kind. The... the cop who came told me I... I didn't have raisin eyes. What are raisin eyes? Fucking idiot. Raisin eyes? I know. If you have any questions just call me. Thanks. Hello? How are you holding up? I'm fine. I never really knew him. So, it's hard to feel sad. Sad enough to actually cry real emotional tears. But... he is my dad, so... I feel something. I just don't know what. It does get easier. Yeah. Look. I... I better get back to the office. Yeah. This might sound really weird, but... you should talk to him. What? It helps, you know? When my husband died, I remember just yapping onto him for an hour. All the things I wanted to say when he was... Was here. I'm sure there's things you want to say to your dad, too. Not that it's any of my business. You can tell me to shut up, if you want. No. It's okay, really. I have no filter. I like it. Are you gonna be okay here? I hope so. Yeah, definitely. When your mom gets here, we'll make further arrangements. Take care, Norval. Who's there? Is someone there? Hello? Who is this? Mom? Is that you? Shut up. Shut up! Shut up! Woo-hoo! I'm not listening! Hello? Gladys? Yes? Who is this? Guess. Mister Greenwood? Bingo. Is there a problem with your father? There's a lot of problems with my father, but that's not why I'm calling. What can I do for you? Good question. I need you to come over. Mr. Greenwood, are you... Shh. Don't think. Just come over. You're going through a difficult time. - We had something. - No, we didn't. - I know you felt it too. - No, I didn't. We owe it to ourselves to explore this. The smartest thing you could do right now is jump in your car and... Please. - Please, please just come over. - No. I... I can't be here alone. We... We could just sleep together. - No. - Just next to each other. - No. - Fully clothed if you wanted. I... I just... I just need you here. Hello? I'm sorry, but I have to go. No, no, no. - Don't go. - Please don't call me outside of office hours. Goodbye, Mr. Greenwood. Fuck! Oh, God. Oh, fuck. Who's doing this? Are you doing this? Are you? You think it's funny? Well, fuck you. You're a coward, that's all you are. A dried-up, dead, leathery coward. I'm glad you're dead. You disappear when I was a kid, and then you try to kill me? And now you're fucking with me from beyond the grave? Are you? I wouldn't be surprised. You think I'm a cunt? That's hilarious. You're the cunt here. So, fuck you. You hear me? Fuck you! Fuck you! Cunt! I have to tell you something. I'm afraid it's gonna make me sound like a bad person. Mom. No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. No, no, no. Norval? Norval. Who are you? You came, you came. Norval, my boy, you actually came. Come over here. Come, come here, help me out. Norval. Come on. Get me out of here. Where's that fucker gone? - They're here. - Who... who... who's here? Close the fucking door. Look at me. I'm your dad. The next 90 seconds are gonna change your life forever. They're coming to hurt me, and you're going to kill them. - I can't. - You're going to hide. And when they're down here, you're going to beat them to death. There's a dumbbell on the floor. You take it, and use it as a weapon, and you bash their fuckin' brains in. What? No. No, no, no. Please. If you don't, they'll kill us both. Hide! How's it hanging, Brian? Huh? Looking good. Feeling good, huh? Viddy this. This, Brian... this is a pen. Not just any pen, it's a pen smeared in extrement. My extrement. Extrement is the scientific word for poo. It's excrement, not extrement. I'm gonna stab you with this pen, Brian. And obviously it's going to hurt. But then the science kicks in. So, the extrement that's on the pen is gonna go into your wound and it's gonna give you an infection that's gonna kill you if you don't get help quickly. How's that for a ticking clock, Brian? How's that for excitement, Brian? Are you excited? Because I'm excited, Brian. Now... why don't you tell me what I want to know... And when this is all over, I'll get you to a hospital. I already told Gordon everything. It's gone. All of it. Shall I tell you how I know you're lying? How? Because when you said that, you looked up to your left. - Oh. - And that's the number one indication when somebody's lying to you. Yeah, I know these things because I've read articles on body language. All right? This is difficult for me too. So what do you say we just get this over and done with as quickly as possible, shall we? No, no, no. - Shall we? - No. Here it comes. Are you ready? - No, no. Come on. - Oh, yeah, yeah. No, no, no, no. God damn it! It stings. The first one stings, doesn't it? Mind you, so does the second one. Fuck! Now! Fuckin' kill him! - Fucking kill him! - What? - Are we not alone, Brian? - Come on! Do it! Come out, come out. Wherever you are. How the fuck are you still alive? Fucking kill him! Fuck this shit. You were supposed to kill him. Gordon! Oh, no! No, no, no! Gordon! What happened to the man who was up there? He tried to stab me. But then he had a heart attack. He died. Good. I'll be back. And I'll be back with a little friend that I want you both to meet! My guess is his little friend is Dandy. Who's Dandy? - The hunchback. - The what? You have to release me. You ever picked a lock before? Once, in school. What happened? I didn't get it unlocked. But I... I found the key in my bag, so it was okay. Oh. Uh, smash the shitty pen. Go on. Yeah. Now, take that long thin bit. God. Now... Now, jam it into the lock. Work it in small circles. Who was that man? His name is Jethro. He's my best friend. Then why is he stabbing you with poo pens and chaining you up in your basement? He has his reasons. After I left your mom, I ended up living in Bangkok. Me, Jethro, Gordon, who you've met, and Dandy. We were misbehaving in a small-time fashion. Until we decided to do one last score. Sail off into the sunset, all that. What did you do? Oh, we kidnapped the daughter of Thailand's richest man. We were supposed to split the ransom between us, but I stole it. I ripped my best friends off. Understandably, they want their share. They think I have stashed it somewhere. Fact is, it's all gone. Every last cent. Where? You ever stop for a moment and wonder why you grew up in a Beverly Hills mansion with an unemployed mother? My entire life has been funded by... A kidnapping. Sorry to change the subject, but this isn't working. You're going to have to dislocate my thumb, I'm afraid. What? You take my thumb and you bend it all the way back. Quickly, come on. On the... The count of three, okay? All right. One, two, three. Just fucking do it. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Did that work? Oh, God, Jesus. Okay. Let's see what we can do here. Right. Thumb wasn't enough. You're gonna have to try the index finger. What? - Come on. - No. I... I can't. Please. I abandoned you as a child. Consider this your revenge. Channel all that anger. Come on. Oh, fuck! Ooh, hoo, oh, hoo, baby. Oh, God. Fuck. You're gonna have to carry me. We have to get as far away from this fuckin' house as possible. I'm not made for this. You want to be tortured to death by a hunchback? Wait! Wait! Put... put... put... put... put... Put me down. Put me down. Whoa, whoa. I need some water. Get me some water, will you? - Okay. - Okay, hurry up. You're missing an ear. - You know that? - Mm-hmm. Gordon kicked it off. Well, shall we go find it? They... they can sew it back on. Not gonna be possible, I'm afraid. Why not? It's just not, okay? Why? I ate it. You... you... You ate your own ear? He made me. He gave me a choice between my own ear or a shot-glass of his semen... like some kind of Japanese game show or something. And I chose the ear. He was starving me! Um, but semen contains more protein and nutrients than an ear. - Ears are just cartilage. - Look! The semen was yellow, okay? I'm not defending my choice to you. Let's fucking go! Can I go to the toilet? Number one or number two? - One. - Be really fucking quick. You really showed me how to play the game Sh... Dandy! Dandy! Don't you touch my son! Don't you fucking touch him! Norval! Come on, Norval! It's you or him! Do what you have to do, son. Kill the fucker! Kill him! Son. Are you okay? Norval? Please tell me you're okay. Hey. What happened in there, you know... it's... it's... It's always... I mean... What I'm saying is it's... Come on. We've got to go. We've got to go! - Who was Ryan? - Huh? Gordon had a tattoo on his neck. "R.I.P Ryan". Oh, Ryan. That was Gordon's son. Slashed his wrists in the bath. Sad story. He was a decent kid. Hide! My little friend can't wait to meet you, you fuckin' wank-stains! Shit. We have to get the fuck away from here. Wait! Dad, wait! I just realized something. - What? - Me and mom's address is written on my luggage tag. - If he finds it... - Fuck. What do we do? Fuck! You're gonna have to kill him. I'm not a murderer. You just killed somebody literally five minutes ago. I'd gladly kill the fucker myself, but look at me. If you don't go in there and kill him, we'll never be safe. You're part of this now. So is your mother. He has a flaming crossbow. I have nothing. I wouldn't last a second. You hide in the trunk of his car. You follow him everywhere. And then when he's alone, when he's vulnerable... Dandy! Not Dandy! You fuckin' killed Dandy too. Go! This is an important announcement for Norval Greenwood of 91622 West Linden Drive, Beverly Hills, California! You and the rest of the Greenwood family are now officially fucked! It's official! Precious? Yeah, yeah. My name's Jethro. I'm a mate of Dandy's. Yeah. I was the guy sitting in the corner watching. Yeah. Look, listen. Could you meet me at the hotel for a session? Like, I'm really stressed. Please. As soon as you can. Oh, you're an angel. Fuck. Shit. Hi. - Are you a prostitute? - Excuse me? Whatever he pays, I'll triple it. All you have to do is leave the door open a little when you leave. Listen, Precious... How in the fuck do you know my name? Get the fuck out of here before I tear your nuts off. Oh, shit. Hey, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Oh. Okay. How can I help you, sir? Uh, I'd like to rent a room, please. Ah, no, no, no, no. The whole motel is booked out, what with the geology conference in town. - Geology conference? - Yeah. It's really a swinger's convention. I shit you not. I have a whole motel full of flabby sex people, just doing whatever they do. But, um, we do have one family unit available, but it's, uh, further down the road. - I'd prefer a room here. - Yeah. I bet you would prefer a room here. But as I already said, there are geologists in every room of the motel, bar none. The one that is available is a family unit some distance away. Now, would you like to rent said family unit? Or do you want to keep doing what we're doing here? - Maybe later. - Okay, maybe later. Bye now. Hey. Yes? I thought I might let you know there's a suspicious woman lingering by a car out there. A suspicious woman? Trust me. Yeah. She's legit. Okay. So, you're clearly some kind of sex freak. But I am intrigued, I'm not gonna lie. I'm serious. Incredible body. All right. Full disclosure, I'm gonna put all my cards on the table. I'm what's known in medical circles as a titty-holic. All right? So, naturally my next question to you is does she, like... Let me stop you right there, and say that if this woman were shopping for bras, she'd be found in the area designated Double D. Okay, well, sir, I will just be right back. Give me a minute, I'll go and investigate. I'll get to the bottom of this. All right. Huh? How do you like that shit, you limp-dicked fuckface? Really get aggressive now. Really pull. - Harder! - Fuck you. Use the red one. Come on. Oh. So, you like that, huh? What did I say? This is private business. Now, fuck off! Uh, listen, Precious, my fight isn't with you. Agree to disagree. Hold him tight for me, Precious. Now, you are going to die here. And I'm going to L.A. So, do have any little message for your mommy? Tell her I love her. I'm gonna specifically tell her that you don't love her. Bastard! Get... ...fucking in! Oh, bugger. That was supposed to go in your ear. - Sorry about that. - Oh! Oh, no, no, no, no. Ah, shit. Hey. No, no, no, no. Hey! I think you killed him. You killed him, you big tonk twat. You just fuckin' squeezed the life clean out of him. I watched you. Do you know something? Sod this fuckin' sad-sack situation. I'm out of here like Vladimir. You are a cold-blooded psychopath. I'm a psychopath? You're a muscle-bound prozzie who gets lonely men into headlocks for cash! And let me tell you something else, sweetheart, there's been this invention called deodorant. You should try it sometime. All right? Jesus! Oh, fuck. What the fuck? Fuck. California, here I come Right back where we started from I got that California itch I'm gonna kill your momma and leave her in a ditch Yeah. Better go tell her Jethro's coming for her Yeah. I'm, like, an accessory to murder. This is... Oh, shit. This is, like, oh... It's, like, a life sentence. Hi. Listen very carefully, Norval. This is very important. So, it's vital that you listen carefully. Right? Your mother is a prostitute. That's how your father met her. He was a frequent flier. You think her name is Jacqueline. But her real name is Annie. I fucked her. I fucked her in an abandoned factory to be precise. But I lost my erection. Because from certain angles, she reminded me of Michael Heseltine. Michael Heseltine... if you're wondering... is a British politician from the 1980s. Arthur! Dear Son. It's me, your Dad. It's been a while, hasn't it? It's fair to say, I've not been the world's best father. In fact, if someone were to accuse me of being a shit excuse for one, well... I wouldn't have much of a defense, would I? But I want that to change. Maybe you'd rather shit a razor blade than have your old man back in your life. But if not, here's where you can find me. I hope to see you soon, son. And I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive your old man. With love, always, your father. I have to tell you something. But I'm afraid it makes me sound like a bad person. I never let Mom get over you. Every man that came along, I drove them away. She had so many chances to be happy. And I never let her. I always thought you'd come back. And then we'd pick up where we left off. Why did you write to me? Dad? Why... why did you write to me? Fuck this shit! |
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