|
Da nao tian gong (The Monkey King: Uproar In Heaven) (1965)
The Monkey King: Uproar in Heaven
Adapted from Journey to the West The King is back! The King is back! Children, gather and practice! Bring me my sabre! I don't have a single good weapon. How can I give you good training? Such a disappointment. If the King wants to find a good weapon, it isn't very difficult. But are you able to dive into the sea? What? The sea? I can fly up to Heaven and burrow into the deepest ground. There's no place I can't go. Then it will be easy. There's a passage under the waterfall leading to the East China Sea Dragon's Palace. Once you are there, you won't have to worry about finding a good weapon. Really? Then I shouldn't worry anymore. Children, wait here a moment. I'll be right back. Halt! Where did you come from? What are you doing here? So it's General Turtle and General Shrimp. I need to see the Dragon King. Please tell him quickly. Quickly bring me to the Dragon King, or you'll have a taste of my fist. I'll go, I'll go! He's escaping, he's escaping! "Dragon Palace" Ma-Majesty... There's a demon monkey barging into the palace. Then drive him away! Hi, old neighbour! What are you doing here? I'm old Sun from the Mountain of Flowers and Fruits. It's just that I'm looking for a perfect weapon. I see. That's no big deal. General Shrimp, go and fetch him a spear. Heh heh, it's not even a weapon. Then fetch him the 1800kg halberd. Heh heh... It's light, too light. Too light? Ok, I've got something heavy for you. I wonder if it's too heavy for you. Guard! Bring the 3600kg halberd, and let him try it. It's still too light for me. Fetch me something heavier. Hey, you are unbelievable. I can't really find anything heavier for you. Your Eastern Sea is so huge... and yet you can't find me a perfect weapon? Please have a look. What's this? This beauty has a great history. It was left behind by a god to calm the sea. If you can remove it then it will be yours. It's truly a treasure. A treasure indeed, a treasure indeed. Too bad it's too thick. If only it could be thinner... Ahhhh!?!? A bit more. Golden-ringed Wishing Staff. Weighs 18,000 lbs Shrink, shrink, shrink! Thanks a lot, old neighbour! This treasure is used to calm the sea, you can't take it away! You said if I remove it, it's mine. Did you not mean what you said? You stole my sea's treasure! The Jade Emperor will hear of this! Your majesty, the monkey Sun Wukong outrageously made havoc in my Palace, and robbed me of my Gold Cudgel, which is used to calm the sea. The monkey is a demon, that will cause us great trouble if it's not severely punished. I hope that I'll win the support from Your Majesty. Where is the wild monkey from? That's a long story. He's a Taoist monkey born 500 years ago. He can subdue tigers and dragons, move mountains, and empty seas. Your majesty, you can't take it lightly. I can't believe it. Which Heaven general would like to vanquish the monkey? Your majesty! In my opinion... we can give him a minor position in Heaven instead of vanquishing him. We'll restrain the monkey here in Heaven, and it will be easy for us to capture him, if he commits crimes. Mmm... What's so special about it? Yeah, what's so special about it? Don't get in the way. Transform! My King, there's an old man coming from the sky. Bring him here, quickly! OK, I'll go. Who the hell are you? What are you doing here? I'm from Heaven, and I'm here to see your King. Nobody can pass without the King's order. Hey, listen! here comes the order from the King. The King ordered to bring the old man forward. Eh... That's more like it. I'm 'Spirit of Planet Venus' from Heaven. The Jade Emperor asked me to take you to Heaven. To Heaven? What for? The Jade Emperor offers you an official position in Heaven. Official, is that interesting work? Heaven is the place where we gods live and is completely different from here in the Mountain of Flowers and Fruits. In Heaven, everything is resplendent and magnificent and is decorated by exotic flowers. There is the Milky Way made up of stars, and there are bridges of rainbows. It'll be such a pity if you don't pay a visit there. Fine, then Old Sun will pay a visit to Heaven with you! My King, we want to go too. Take us with you. Can we go to Heaven too? Why not? I'll go and see what's Heaven is like first. You stay here and practice. If Heaven is really nice, I will take all of you there. Yes, all of you should stay here and practice. I will take you there next time. Eh? Where's your King? Our great King has already flown 54,000 km. You better hurry. Wait for me! "Heaven's South Gate" Where did you come from? I was invited by the Jade Emperor. Stop wasting my time and let me enter. Do you have an invitation? The Jade Emperor invited me to Heaven. Why are you so aggressive? Now step aside! Don't make me angry. Or else... Don't fight, don't fight. Old man, why did you trick me? Why aren't they letting me in? This is your first time here, they don't recognize you. Step aside! This is the earth sage. Under the Jade Emperor's orders, I invited him to Heaven. Go ahead. "Palace Hall" Please wait a moment. Wait for me to announce you're arrival. Your majesty! Sun Wukong has arrived in Heaven. Please enter the hall! Please enter the hall!! Please enter the hall!!! Where did he go, where did he go? The monkey is here! So you weren't a dummy? Ha ha ha... Hurry and greet the Jade Emperor! Hurry, hurry! Where is the Jade Emperor? Where? Up there. Hurry and go pay your imperial respect. Kneel down! Your majesty, this is Sun Wukong, the earth sage. He doesn't know the rules of Heaven. Forgive him, Your Majesty. Forgiven. Wu Qu Xing! Here! Check if there are any vacant positions. Yes, Your Majesty. Give him a small position. Your Majesty, the stable is missing a keeper. Appoint Sun Wukong as Keeper of the Imperial Stables. You may leave. Hurry and give your thanks. What does the keeper do? As Keeper of the Imperial Stables you will manage all the Heaven horses. Your position is the highest at the Imperial Stables. Hurry and express your gratitude. Congratulations my King. Congratulations my King. My King, stop playing, stop playing. Stable... What are you doing? Get up, get up! Will the stable keeper please examine the Heaven horses? How can you keep the horses like this? Horse General! Here! The Keeper of the Imperial Stables is your subordinate. You must keep a close eye on him. You must be cautious. Understood! Since you came here the Heaven horses have been very happy and comfortable. You must have put in a lot of effort. Horse General is here! Will the stable keeper go and greet him? Horse General? It's Cow General! Ignore him! Horse General... Why didn't the new stable keeper come and greet me? He... is grooming the horses. Move! What's this? Who released the Heaven horses? How dare you come here and cause trouble? How dare you, demon head? The Jade Emperor appoints you to look after the horses and you release them? If a single horse is missing... mind your head. Who do you think you are to come and discipline me? I was ordered by the Jade Emperor to watch over you, demon head! Now be good and listen! hahahahaha Shut up! The Jade Emperor didn't invite me to Heaven to have someone look after me! How dare you? Do you have any respect for the Jade Emperor? Troops, capture him! Who has the guts to capture me? Go to hell! Somebody help! Help me! Tell your old Jade Emperor that he doesn't respect me. Tell him to watch out, I'm not one to be pushed around. Your Majesty! Something terrible just happened. The Stable Keeper injured the Horse General, ruined the Heavenly Stables, left through the Southern Gate, and went back to the Mountain of Flowers and Fruits. How dare that demon monkey? He broke the laws of Heaven. We must bring him back for a trial. It was rashness of the Horse General that ruined our plan. Let me settle it, trick him back to Heaven, and watch carefully over him. Hold it! Your Majesty! Old Venus always wants to settle. He's loosening Heaven's laws. We should not put up with the savage monkey anymore. Allow me to bring him back for trial. You shouldn't dispatch troops so hastily. Then should we allow the monkey to climb all over us? Then may I ask, King Li, what are you planning to do? The monkey mocks the Heavenly Majesty. If we don't punish him severely, others may follow his example. The world will be in havoc! What a great point! I'm convinced. News! Your Majesty! The Stable Keeper put up a banner at the Mountain of Flowers and Fruits declaring himself 'Great Sage Equal of Heaven'. How dare he declare himself Great Sage? God Chu Ling! Yes! You go attack the front line. Understood! Who are you? Hurry and give me your name! Hahahahahahahaha You're just a small monkey You can't withstand a hit from me. Demon monkey sure is ferocious. Nezha the third prince is coming. What kind of joke is this? You hair isn't even fully grown. I, The Great Sage, won't fight you. Who are you to declare yourself The Great Sage? Eat this! Tell that old Jade Emperor of yours to grant me the title 'The Great Sage'. If he doesn't, I will turn the Heavenly Palace upside down. Don't get too excited. I will wipe out your Mountain of Flowers and Fruits! Only if you have the guts to come. I, The Great Sage, will be waiting for you. Your Majesty, your servant is here... I went to capture the demon monkey. But the monkey's sorcery is mighty. Nezha and the Mighty Magic Spirit are incapable of victory. Your Majesty, you must send more troops. With this many troops you can't even defeat a single monkey?! You still require more soldiers. The monkey is really powerful. Old official already said that the monkey knows 72 transformations. His abilities are indeed not small.. Your Majesty, he boastfully calls himself the Great Sage Equal of Heaven. If we don't accommodate him, he plans to attack the Heavenly Palace! Please send more troops to vanquish the monkey, Your Majesty. No, No... That demon monkey seems invincible. Let's beat him at his own game. What about acknowledging the fake title of 'Great Sage, Equal of Heaven', so we can restrict him in Heaven. It's not a bad idea. But I think the monkey will cause more trouble once he gets used to life in Heaven. To stop him from causing more trouble, the only choice is to get rid of him. Mmm... Ah... Your Majesty, there should be no more fighting. It's much more feasible to restrict him in Heaven. I think we should follow Great White Planet's advice. We'll make him the keeper of the Queen Mother's Peach Garden and tame him. Should he cause more trouble, it would be easy to capture him again. Reasonable choice, Your Majesty. I'll go and trick him to Heaven again. King, we've captured a spy. Bring him over here! My Great Sage. Oh, it's you. What are you doing here again? Great Sage, I'm under the Jade Emperor's order to invite you... What does Jade Emperor order? I don't accept this method. This, this, this Last time it was Horse General who wrongly accused you. Jade Emperor has already punished him. Punish him good, that's how it should be. The Jade Emperor appointed you 'The Great Sage' and invited you to Heaven. Old Jade Emperor appointed you The Great Sage! The Great Sage! Your Jade Emperor is already beaten. I'm already The Great Sage here at the Mountain of Flowers and Fruits. I don't need him to appoint me. I'm not going! Go back! Leave quickly! The fruits and flowers of this mountain are quite flourishing. The landscape is pretty good. It has always been good. It is good... but compared to the Peach Garden in Heaven... it doesn't even come close. What Peach Garden can compare to the Mountain of Flowers and Fruits? The Queen's Peach Garden is the most godly landscape in the world. The most beautiful landscape, nothing can compare to it. This fruit can only... I couldn't lie to you again. Great Sage, the Jade Emperor grants you to look after the Peach Garden. Such a great place, could it be that you don't even want to go check it out? Wait... Let me think about it. Fine, I'll go with you to check it out. Congratulations Great Sage! Old man, where is the Peach Garden located? Look this way. That sparkling sunset glow is the Peach Garden. Well, I'll take a look. "Peach Garden" Oh, it's The Great Sage. I'm Tu Di, the God of Earth, here to greet The Great Sage. Good, I'm here to examine the garden! Great Sage, I'll lead the way. Great Sage! Great Sage! Great Sage, it takes these trees 3000 years to blossom and 3000 years to bear fruit. One will never age if one eats from it. What, eat just one peach and never age? Yes, yes, yes... Eat one and never age, never age. Great Sage, there's more up ahead. This, Great Sage, takes and 6000 years to bear fruit. If one eats it, one can become a god. This is a great place to be. Let me have a taste. Great Sage, don't! You mustn't! Why not? Great Sage, you can't. These are the Queen's peaches used especially for the peach banquet. You can't eat them now, Great Sage. Then when can they be eaten? Wait until the peach banquet and for a 9000 year old peach. Then Great Sage can eat joyfully. When will that be? Hurry up and check! Great Sage, these peaches... These peaches are extraordinary. I know, 9000 years to blossom and 9000 years to bear fruit. Right is right. I'll go check it out myself. You go drink something. I'm here to accompany you. It's OK! Why wait until the banquet when I can eat it right now? The goddesses are here. I didn't come to greet you, please forgive me. There's no need for formalities, it's OK. Quickly bring us to the garden. Goddess, I can't right now. Why not? The Jade Emperor appointed Great Sage to look after the Peach Garden. Please wait, I'll go ask for his permission. What Great Sage? Who cares who he is, we don't need his permission to go there. please wait... you cannot go... please... please... Oh well, I'll wait until the Great Sage returns to report this. How come there's so little of the Holy peach this year? Maybe someone has picked them. Who would dare do that, unless it was you? It was you, it was you... Sisters, come over here. There's a big peach here. Where? Who are you? We're here to pick peaches according to the Queen Mother's order. Who are you? Oh, you are sent by Queen Mother. I'm the Great Sage, Equal of Heaven. What are you picking peaches for? To make preparations for the Peach Banquet. Interesting, interesting. Which Gods will be invited for the Peach Banquet? The Supreme Lord Lao. The Goddess Guanyin. Celestial beings from the eight upper caves, from the eight middle caves, and from the eight lower caves. Mm-mm... who else? There are so many of them. All the celestial beings are invited. Even the Dragon King of the Eastern Sea is invited. Shut up! Why wasn't I, the Great Sage Equal of Heaven, invited? What Great Sage Equal of Heaven? Never heard of you. You are just a monkey tending the Peach Garden Why would the Queen Mother invite you? I see. So this is why they tricked me up to Heaven. Damn Jade Emperor, you keep mocking me over and over again. I'll never forgive you. Let's go, sisters. Hurry. Stop! Freeze! Old Jade Emperor, you keep mocking me, the Great Sage, Equal of Heaven. But I'm going to sit on your throne today, here in the Peach Banquet. Old Jade Emperor, come over here and fill my cup with wine. Queen Mother, give me the peaches. The Jade Emperor has acknowledged your title of 'Great Sage Equal of Heaven'. What Great Sage Equal of Heaven?! Never heard of you. Old Jade Emperor, the Great Sage has no seat for you. Queen Mother, the banquet can be more exciting. Give me the wine. Children, come, come. Come have a drink. Heh heh, there are so many exquisite things here. They are too good for the celestial beings to enjoy. I'll take them to my boys in the Mountain of Flowers and Fruits to make the children happy. Old Jade Emperor, nobody dares to offend you. But Old Sun will offend you today. Going back to Mountain of Flowers and Fruits... "Dou Shuai Palace" Why am I here at Supreme Lord Lao Zi's palace? Hehe, it's nice and quiet here. I'll go and have some fun. Old man. Old man. Where did the old man go? Old man. Elixir Pill Room? Today Old Sun will look at Supreme Lord Lao's pharmacy. "Jade Emperor's Golden Elixir" It's the Golden Elixir Pill for the Jade Emperor. Let me have a taste. Heh heh, Jade Emperor. There's no Golden Elixir Pill for you this time. I'll go have a wine party with my boys in the mountain. Great King, the King is back. Great King, great King. Come on, come on Children, the Immortal Wine and Holy Dishes are sent by the Jade Emperor and Queen Mother. Let's happily eat them. Come, come. This is the Queen Mother's peaches, eating them will let you live long and not grow old. This... This is intolerable! That Sun Wukong is so savage. He ate the magic peaches. And when he learned he wasn't invited to the Peach Banquet, he attacked the Jade Emperor and Queen Mother with a torrent of abuse. The savage monkey is... uncontrollable! How dare that monkey! Your Majesty, we must punish the monkey severely. Here comes Supreme Lord Lao Zi. Your Majesty! At ease. Your Majesty, Sun Wukong ate up all of the Golden Elixir Pills I made for you. He's now back in his mountain. Please capture the monkey and punish him severely. Please dispatch the troops right now. I announce you the captain of 100,000 Heavenly soldiers to capture the monkey. Yes! You're a savage monkey to ruin the Peach Party and eat up all of Lord Lao Zi's Golden Elixir Pills. Yes, I did them both. So What? You committed 10 crimes and yet you're not begging for forgiveness! What can a small god like you do? How dare you talk so much rubbish? Come on, go! You, wait in ambush in the mountain front. You, wait in ambush in the mountain back. Never let the monkey escape. Here is my order, MeiShan Brothers. Go and help Erlang capture the monkey. There can be no delay. Your Majesty, let me, a poor monk, aid Erlang. Go How despicable to stab me in the back. It's not very heroic. Humpf! You damn monkey. Now you know what comes around when you rebel against me. Heh heh, old Jade Emperor! You are so despicable as to stab me in the back! I'm curious to know what you will do to me next. Damn monkey, you are faced with imminent disaster, and still you dare say things like that? Now execute the monkey! Shoot the arrows! Shoot the arrows! Ah.. What can we do to kill the monkey? Your Majesty, I'll take care of it. Come. Put the monkey in the knitting needles furnace. Monkey, how do you like it in the furnace? Too hot, too hot. Don't bother, there will be more heat. Come, quickly blow the fire. Yes Sir. Hey, monkey, how do you feel now? It's much cooler, very pleasant in here. Ah!?!?... Heh! Okay, I made it too cool and too comfortable... I'll make it hot for you. Monkey, how do you feel now? Are you still feel comfortable? Ah? Ha hahaha hahahahaha! The monkey has been burnt into ashes. Put out the fire. Open the furnace. The monkey must have been burnt to two knitting needles and seeds. My Great Sage! My Great Sage! Hahahaha... Hahahaha... "The Great Sage, Equal of Heaven" |
|