I do want our readers to feel
that this is really your story.
So I thought I'd ask you a few questions...
and if you'd just answer them
in your own words...
Yes, I see. All right, ask away.
Let's start at the beginning, shall we?
I had a terribly ordinary childhood,
I'm afraid.
Born at an early age, and all that.
Fell off lots of bicycles,
ate too many cream cakes...
A normal childhood, you know.
This is me, age six.
Probably a piece of chewing gum
stuck under my hat, only you can't see.
I do remember...
I was always the sort of child
who got picked on to do things.
What a darling little baby he is.
Joseph is actually my older sister, Felicity.
I told everyone she had grown the beard
especially for the part.
Felicity, poor thing, was not amused.
You must be very proud of her, Mrs. Scott.
She's a darling.
She's going to go a long way.
You can see that.
Yes, I think she is.
This is me, age 20.
I don't know what I was wearing.
Terribly Chelsea, I thought I was.
Really, I suppose I was
as square as an ice cube with it.
- Try that one over there.
- Right you are.
- Me, on the telly?
- It won't take a minute.
How fascinating.
You must tell me what to do.
Could you come this way?
I hate convention. You can't breathe.
You have to break away.
But isn't the breakaway of yesterday
the convention of today?
Then you have to break away again.
Just for the sake of it?
Isn't that conventional?
The way young people live today...
the way they dress, dance, talk...
It's more conventional
than what they're trying to escape.
Would you say
the way I dress was conventional?
Your dress is in the height of fashion,
and your hair is...
She's fine. We'll use that. Very good.
How conventional are we
in matters of public taste?
The London skyline is constantly altering,
and yet young architects...
Thank you for letting me see
the finished product.
- It's a very good program.
- You really think so?
I thought I looked ghastly,
but it was a super program.
I thought you looked super,
and the program looked ghastly.
What's more, I'm right, too.
No, I thought you looked
frightfully lean and intelligent.
I am frightfully lean and intelligent,
not that it helps.
- You must lead such an interesting life.
- Being a professional question mark?
- It's better than being a professional bosom.
- What's that?
You should try posing for Brides sometime.
I did once. It was a disaster.
A complete disaster.
Is this yours?
Yes, as a matter of fact, it is.
This one.
What do you think I am? Go on, get in.
There's so much junk in it,
though I keep on chucking things out.
- Have an icy drop.
- I'd love one. Thank you.
- One, two...
- Thank you.
Oh, dear.
We just sort of began to meet.
He had tickets for this,
or he thought I might be interested in that.
It was really mostly mental, to start with.
There was nothing deliberate about it.
We didn't know what we were doing at all.
- You're a thoroughly rotten shot.
- Thoroughly rotten target.
You couldn't miss a dickey bird.
Buried treasure.
Heads, we do. Tails, we don't.
We do.
How I'd love to live here.
- We'd have to do an awful lot to it.
- We'd have to do everything to it.
Yes, you're right.
Do you know these cottages
are being carefully rehabilitated?
At great expense.
And will emerge as unique
cottage-type homes of distinction.
- Do you want to live in such a home?
- I wouldn't mind.
With a yellow front door
and a carriage lantern?
- Absolutely lovely.
- Ghastly! I really do believe...
I do.
- You are a fantastic girl.
- Why?
I don't know. You just are.
It should be so easy to be happy,
shouldn't it?
- Should be the easiest thing in the world.
- Should be.
I wonder why it isn't.
Maybe it is.
Is it all right for Wednesday?
It's all right for Wednesday.
I hate this furtiveness. It's so corny.
- It's so embarrassing.
- What do you want to do, then?
I don't know.
I do know.
I don't know.
I know.
Wife.
Husband.
Come on, darling.
It's so boring.
Come on, darling. You started it.
It was your idea to learn the language
for our holiday.
Yes, and all we'd ever be able to say was,
"What a lovely view!"
I'm getting on with it.
All right, you get on with it.
Of course, I loved him dearly.
He was one of the nicest boys in the world.
It's just that
he was so desperately immature.
Marriage had been sort of foisted on him,
poor lamb.
He just wasn't ready for the responsibility.
He tried nobly, but he hadn't really got
the faintest idea what it was all about.
Mr. Southgate, you have the reputation
of being something of a lone wolf.
Is this a protest against the establishment?
It's true I have always preferred...
to be a mouse that walked by itself...
rather than a member of a group
of literary lions...
always licking each other,
washing each other behind the ears...
and biting each other.
And, as you know,
they're behind bars in a cultural zoo.
- They won't let you print that?
- Yes, they will, if I fight.
- And will you fight?
- He fights.
Something else.
Now that you've moved down here
into the country, into virtual isolation...
Robert had marvelous tact,
incredible maturity, sensitivity.
He had got this funny old bloke
spouting his head off.
Fascinating. I'd never met anyone
like old Southgate.
Suddenly one felt madly in, you know.
I mean, to think...
this is the one of the great writers
of the century, and here I am.
It was extraordinary.
I don't really remember much anyone said.
But that wasn't really the thing.
The thing was they accepted me.
- I'm just dying to read your books.
- They're mostly out of print.
- Do you mind if I help myself?
- Please do.
Thank you.
- It's been fabulous meeting you.
- You a truth-teller?
- Yes, I think so.
- Is she?
- I know she is with me.
- You consider yourself a very lucky man.
Yes, I do.
Gosh, that's marvelous.
I'm glad you like it. I'd rather have done it...
than written half my stories.
Probably only took him half an hour.
I should like you to have it. Both of you.
- We couldn't possibly. Absolutely not.
- Please.
- It's yours. It belongs to you.
- I'm 78 years old, more or less.
Besides, I'd much rather you left this place
with this under your arm...
than that recording of antique birdsong.
Thank you.
Just one moment, please.
I have a call for you.
Go ahead, lpswich.
Estelle.
- How are the children?
- Fine.
I shall have to stay the night.
I'm staying with him, actually.
- All right.
- Say I'm sorry. Give them my love, will you?
And tell them I'll see them tomorrow.
Bye.
Okay, your go now.
If I can get some money out...
- Euston, 4614.
- Go ahead, Southampton.
Tony? Hello, love. I'm still in Southampton.
What a bore.
I know, darling.
It's just as much a bore for me.
Okay, see you tomorrow. Bye-bye, darling.
Thank you, sir.
Wait till we get these on.
Funny pair, that Mr. And Mrs. Gold in 409.
I suppose you've done this sort of thing...
- hundreds of times before.
- You're wrong.
I've never.
Not exactly my line, either.
I just happen to love you. I told you.
It is real, then?
It's the first time I've felt real for a long time.
Me, too.
Me, what?
Me, too.
Go on.
Look, how jazzy! Every three hours
we can call for refreshments.
Welcome.
The thought of breaking up
someone's family...
was absolutely repellent to me, honestly.
If anyone had told me
I was doing anything like that...
I would have been horrified.
I've always regarded families...
as "unbustable," you know?
Over there, a spare divan...
and pictures of Cambridge.
Very convenient door through there,
leading to bedroom.
- A picture reproduction of clown.
- Glass is cracked.
A mirror with gilt ormolu frame. One clock.
Seems to have stopped.
I'm sure it only needs winding.
Through here, you've got your hall.
The gas meter's there.
Through there to the kitchen.
Three stairs up here to the bathroom.
Large cupboard there.
Very useful for leaving one's coats.
And then, in the kitchen...
we have the gas cooker, put in
by the last tenants. So it's relatively new.
Your books have arrived.
And your records.
- Are these yours?
- Yes.
Hello, my darling.
... it doesn't intrude on you,
because it's been dead for so long.
It has properties
of a beautifully laid out corpse.
You know, you don't worry about it.
It's always there...
Darling?
Sorry. Are Liz and Willie on or off
at the moment?
- I don't know. I have no idea at all.
- What shall I put?
Just put, "With best wishes"
and leave out, "To you both."
"Love, Robert...
"and Diana.
"Kiss, kiss."
- Happy Christmas.
- Cool Christmas.
Happy Christmas!
The most gorgeous Negroes
you've ever seen have just gone upstairs.
- What on earth's going on up there?
- They're having a diplomatic reception.
Would you like to have
a diplomatic reception?
What a good idea!
I can't get them to go.
Make them. Force them to go.
How?
- I don't know. Can't you force them to go?
- I don't know half of them.
Oh, dear. I just wish they'd all go away
from our little place.
Why did we ever have this party?
I don't know, but I wish they'd all go.
My friends seem to get on very well
with your friends.
Your friends are so pretty.
Yours are so intelligent.
I couldn't have been happy
if I'd kept Robert from his children.
I was absolutely insistent, rain or shine,
he went and saw them.
I couldn't have forgiven myself
if he hadn't done that, you see.
I've never really been the jealous type.
Where the hell have you been?
- I told you I had to go and see the children.
- Till this hour?
Did you see her?
Her?
- No.
- I don't know whether I believe you.
What makes you think she wants to see me?
- Perhaps you want to see her.
- Perhaps I do.
Why don't you tell me if you want to
see her? If you're still in love with her?
Lord.
Look here. No, listen.
I love you. Honestly.
- Robert, you won't leave me, will you?
- Leave you?
If only you knew.
I'm so frightened sometimes.
What do you mean,
you're so frightened sometimes?
- What are you frightened of?
- We're so happy.
Shall we get married?
Get married and finish all this?
Darling, I'm so happy as we are.
I don't want anything to change.
If we got married...
there'd be so much bitterness and
unhappiness for everyone, wouldn't there?
Darling.
Good evening.
An American statesman recently said...
that Britain was a country
which had lost pride in itself.
Have we so much to be ashamed of,
I wonder?
Let's find out.
What are you ashamed of in Britain today?
- Can't think of nothing.
- Nothing?
The traffic. It's a bit congested...
That's the worst thing,
as far you're concerned?
Some people don't work hard enough.
I work hard in Bristol. I do it for one person.
Her name's Margaret Robins.
I've got the photograph on me.
Everyone these days
wants something for nothing.
They don't want to put anything out
for what they're striving to get out of this.
Talking as a Londoner, I think...
how rife homosexuality has become,
in London itself.
I would say again, in retrospect,
that a few years back...
Again, two or three years ago...
that you were very blatantly approached
by different people in different places.
Really?
It does, sort of, still...
- You say it's worse?
- It has become worse over a period of time...
- but you have to live with it.
- I suppose so.
- Try that London number again?
- What was that number again, sir?
- Flaxman-2249.
- One moment, please.
Morphy Richards refrigerator,
gift of Mr. Charles Glass...
Number 81.
- Here.
- Mr. David Rodney Barlow.
Holiday for two in the Bahamas,
gift of Mr. Samuel Goldstone...
Number 68.
Yes, me. But I've just come back.
Normally I never did charity work.
It's usually terribly draggy.
But Robert was away, and Miles Brand
happened to phone the same day.
After all, he had chosen me
for the Honeyglow girl.
Miles didn't mean a thing in my private life.
I didn't attach any importance to it.
- Still admire yourself as much as ever?
- Carlotta.
How lucky it is
you're a man after your own heart.
I thought I could smell prussic acid.
I put it down to the weather.
Must make a change
from putting it down to expenses.
How savage we are tonight.
Somebody's husband
gone back to his wife?
If he had,
you'd have been there to greet him.
- Leftovers aren't exactly my diet, darling.
- I thought you were always in the market.
That remark was young when you were.
- Miles, Mr. Glass.
- Excuse me.
I suppose the main attraction
was Charles Glass.
Mr. Honeyglow, himself.
He's a terrible sweetie.
Do you know Charles?
Eighty-two.
Sean, my dear fellow,
I hear you're making a new movie.
How the hell do you know that?
I take a great interest
in your squalid career. I have to.
If you're shooting full-length epics...
you won't want to do commercials
for the Glass Group.
Says who?
After all, a lie can be shot with integrity
just like anything else. Who's the crumpet?
You've been most kind. Thank you so much.
Now, ladies and gentlemen, a few words...
from the president of the charity
we've all been assisting tonight.
Pray, silence for
the Right Honorable Basil Willet, MP.
A man of few words,
and all of them long ones.
You were splendid, Diana.
I want you to meet Sean Martin.
This is Miss Diana Scott.
- Hello.
- How do you do?
Would Mr. Glass say a few words?
I doubt it, but I'll ask him.
Would you excuse me?
I want to say just this:
No matter how much public money...
we, the government,
devote to good causes...
there will always be a place
for private generosity...
like yours, ladies and gentlemen, tonight.
Never have I seen so many hearts
so obviously in the right place.
I'm sure I have no need
to bring to your attention...
the plight of our brothers...
of every creed, race and color...
in every far-flung corner of the Earth...
who at this very moment
are suffering the humiliation...
degradation, shame...
of the agonies of malnutrition.
Of course, I'd love to make a film someday.
But so much is important:
The right director, the right script...
You think a good director
makes a difference, do you?
It has been known.
- This is my wife, Sybil. Diana Scott.
- Hello.
I think he managed that
very well indeed, don't you?
Here she is. Diana.
I was half afraid you'd walked out
in protest against my speechifying.
Not at all.
They've got something for us upstairs.
Crisps and Pepsi-Cola.
I'm afraid I haven't seen
one of your pictures.
So little time when one's in politics
to do anything except try and stay here.
I must say that Bruce Rolford
lost 27,000 last week.
Actually, to refute his exaggeration,
good evening...
- it was only 21,000.
- Is that all?
- Miles, how are you?
- Well, Your Grace. And you?
- Absolutely splendid.
- I'm delighted.
It was said of her great-grandmother...
that the only cabinet members
who weren't her lovers...
were those who had reason to believe
they might be her father.
Yes. Poor Elspeth.
She's got a lot to live up to.
- Lf it isn't the Lord Grant.
- My dear Miles.
Like your black boys, John. I suppose
I can't wrap one up to take him home.
I wouldn't advise you to try.
They're all numbered. I wouldn't try
and change your luck if I were you.
- I think everything's laid on...
- Would you like to see the library?
Only one way to preserve a library today.
That's to build a gambling den around it.
"This royal throne of kings
"This scepter'd isle
"This earth of majesty
"This seat of Mars
"This other Eden, demi-paradise
"This fortress built by Nature for herself
"Against infection and the hand of war
"This happy breed of men, this little world
"This precious stone set in the silver sea
"Which serves it in the office of a wall
Or as a moat defensive to a house
"Against the envy
"of less happier lands
"This blessed plot, this earth, this realm
"this England"
That's the Glass house.
What's this supposed to be?
It's known familiarly
as three couples taking their pleasures...
with a fourth looking on.
Charming.
Would it be locked?
One has a key.
One would.
- Is this you?
- My secretary.
Do you go into sporting?
Yes, I do.
- Do you?
- No, I don't do anything.
What is it?
Do you have parents?
I can't imagine you with parents.
Yes, I have.
Two of them.
- Imagine if...
- What?
...it took three.
- Took three?
Sexes to make a child.
Very entertaining.
Everything would be different, wouldn't it?
Quite different with three sexes.
Haven't we got enough problems with two?
- Is this where the Glass millions are stored?
- Millions? No.
Don't tell me it only contains
a pint of milk and a book of stamps.
Leave me my illusions, please.
It's mainly papers.
- Important papers?
- Very.
Do open it. I should love to see
an important paper. I never have.
Wouldn't you, under any circumstances?
If someone made it worth your while,
really worth your while?
Have you ever been afraid, really afraid?
- What's an important paper about?
- All sorts of things.
- People you're about to take over?
- Could be.
And people we're interested in,
one reason or another.
Don't people know
when you're interested in them?
They know, sometimes.
Well, then?
- But they don't know how interested.
- No, I suppose not.
- That's not so easy to tell, I suppose.
- One hopes not.
I wish you'd open up.
I can't do that.
- Sorry.
- What for?
I seem to be leaving
most of your tires on the road.
Enjoy yourself, with the compliments
of the Glass organization.
- Don't you possess anything of your own?
- Only the things I can't replace.
Of course I told Robert about Miles.
It didn't mean anything, after all.
I was always absolutely honest with Robert.
I just had to be.
And heavens, there's nothing wrong with
somebody helping you with your career.
Miles was just madly helpful.
He knew absolutely everyone.
He was just so madly helpful, that's all.
We just wanted to have a look at you.
Yes. We just want to take a look at you.
Have a look.
Would you look toward the street?
That's right. Now the door.
That's right. Now I want you to look at me...
but keep your neck the same angle.
What do you think?
She's all right. She's fine.
- Has she enough profile?
- Sure.
She'll be standing up most of the time.
Excuse me, but I don't even know
what the film's called.
Jacqueline.
- The book?
- Yes.
What part would it be?
Jacqueline.
So much for me. That's me lot.
What?
There was a bit later, when I was picked up
by the ambulance, but that's been cut.
Tough.
From now on,
it's just about who did me and why.
You two make a round back.
Roberts, will you help me?
- Yes?
- My name's Martin. Inspector Martin.
We've been expecting you. This way, please.
What a party. What a wake.
What a bunch of zombies.
You hated the movie?
- Didn't you? If you did, say you did.
- I did.
- You didn't?
- All right, I didn't.
You did. Then, I must say...
never been so insulted in all me days.
Me first title role.
- Robert, what did you think of Miles?
- Absolutely crazy about him.
- Seriously, what did you?
- What can I say?
- You think I've been a fool?
- No, people do what they want to.
- You are jealous.
- Who knows what I am?
- You're the one I bed with.
- At present.
I hate you. What a thing to say!
What do you want me to say?
You know as well as I do what you're up to.
Don't be jealous. There's no need.
Anyway, this is the finish.
- Of what?
- Me and showbiz.
Why?
It so happens I'm pregnant.
You're angry?
Are you pleased?
I'm pleased.
You should have told me sooner.
I would have carried you.
- I can't hear any ticking.
- You won't for some months.
- You never know.
- Yes, you would.
- Are you pleased?
- Lf you are.
- What shall we call it?
- Jacqueline.
But, of course. Jacqueline.
- Shall I wear it to Pat and Marge's?
- Darling, it's much too soon for that.
Oh, yes. Just for a giggle.
Please. I'll have this.
I hadn't really thought
about what it meant, you know.
It seemed lovely.
But then I realized it was going to be
the ruination of my career...
messing up people's lives. ;
mine, Robert's, everybody's.
I just began to realize
I couldn't go through with it.
Heather was lovely. She was terribly nice.
Because she'd had
a miscarriage herself recently...
and she sort of knew the ropes on that.
Thank you.
If you could be here on Friday
at 11:00, that would be best.
Bring overnight things
and skip breakfast that morning.
Thank you.
How do you feel?
I don't want anything to do with sex again
as long as I live.
How do you feel?
Empty.
- When are they going to let you out?
- Anytime.
They've got lots of eager ladies.
They're queuing for the bed, it seems.
I can believe that.
I'm not going back to the flat.
I see.
You don't, but it doesn't matter.
All right. I don't.
My sister came to see me.
I'm going down with them...
to the country.
- Jesus, honey...
- Don't touch me.
- I just wish that...
- It's no good wishing.
I'll probably stay at the flat for a bit.
If you want me, that's where I'll be.
Don't forget to feed the fishes.
Poor little things.
You're dead.
Are you really dead?
- Dead-ing. You'll never catch me.
- I will.
I've got "Trouble at Number 10," darling.
What have you got?
- I've got "Plurality in the Test Tube."
- Nasty.
Don't point guns, William.
I've told you about that before.
I don't want her to get too tired, Alec.
Come on, William, that's enough.
Leave Aunty Diana alone.
Come on, darling, don't be tiresome.
Come on, come and sit down here
and play with your comics.
Darling, come and sit down.
We don't want to get you tired out,
you know. Come and relax.
Have a comic.
Pity you missed the daffodils this year.
They're absolutely lovely.
- Would you like crispy?
- Just a bit, but no fat.
Here you are, lvor.
- Changed your hairstyle, I see.
- Good. You like it?
They have a new Hungarian, he's a refugee,
who does it nicely.
Gives it volume, which is what I like.
Do start, Rupert, don't stand on ceremony.
Is this mine, darling?
- It's yours.
- Thank you.
- The lawn looks good. How do you do it?
- It's that new Stay-Green.
What about that plastic sprinkler
I recommended?
- Useless. Couldn't get it through the hose.
- Really? I'm awfully sorry.
This will turn into
one of those frightful gardening talks.
I know it's therapeutic,
but you really must stop it.
All right.
Saw your film at our local fleapit.
- Sorry we didn't see more of you.
- Sadly, we missed the beginning.
Best part. You were stunning.
You liked my black lingerie, did you?
- Ivor's been after me to buy some.
- Really, is nothing sacred?
Not much.
See what your type of picture does
to our suburban morals?
Honestly, you were jolly good.
Thank you.
- Rupert makes films, too, you know.
- How fascinating!
Honestly, I thought
we'd made a solemn pact.
You must tell me all about it.
It's something I had to do
for the war house. A training film.
A training film?
How to Service an Armored Car.
A star vehicle, no less.
Hadn't thought of that.
Nothing like yours, of course.
- Alec, may I have the horseradish, please?
- Mommy.
Whatever are you doing up at this hour?
I haven't had my chocolate or anything.
Really, William, you are being so boring.
I thought we discussed all this...
- But I haven't had my...
- Now, don't start your sniveling.
Don't worry, Felicity,
I'll find him his chocolate.
Would you, darling? Thank you so much.
You know, she's absolutely brilliant
with children.
Quite marvelous.
I do apologize. I'm so sorry.
What was actually wrong
with Diana's original husband?
Tony Bridges?
Too young.
- Rupert's the right age.
- And steady.
Bridges was steady.
Yes, but he was too young.
Rupert's the right age.
- Do you think he...
- I think he did.
- Do you think she did?
- I think she did.
Alec, you've got your elbow somehow...
I wasn't aware. Sorry, dear.
What I shall never understand...
is how you and she...
Same parents, same background...
Yes, I know. She's odd.
This chap of hers in London...
- is that all finished now?
- Yes, no question of that at all.
Completely finished.
I'm back.
- Like that?
- I had to.
It was so boring, I could've screamed.
- You came in the train dressed like that?
- No one noticed.
What a funny girl.
One day I'm gonna have to
bail you out of a clink...
for indecent exposure.
- Would you?
- Of course I would.
- Want some coffee?
- No, I don't.
Sorry I spoke.
Would you rather
I went up to the office and worked?
I don't know.
Something about a typewriter.
I'm sorry.
Here. Come on.
Why don't you go and do something?
Try that audition. It's your sort of thing.
Have a try.
Just go and have a go.
Take the car, and don't crash it.
"I want to dance. I want to dance!
That's what you'll never understand.
"I don't want to think. I want to dance!"
- Your name, please?
- Diana Scott.
Would you like to wait over there, please?
Tell me about yourself,
what you've been up to recently.
Done six months at Bournemouth Rep,
playing leads and things.
Some television.
Z- Cars, Avengers. Season at Worthing Rep.
Couple of Edgar Wallaces at Merton Park.
Thank you. Thank you very much.
Next, please.
Miss Joy Green, please.
Miss Joy Green, thank you.
- Miss Green?
- Yes.
- You've gone over that speech on the sheet?
- Yes, I have.
Right. Thank you.
- "I want to dance."
- Louder, please.
"I want to dance!
"That's what you'll never understand.
I don't want to think.
"I want to dance."
- Hey, that's my meter.
- Sorry.
Sorry? I should think you are sorry.
Go on, get out of it. Women drivers.
- Look who's here.
- Your secretary told me you'd be here.
- Hope you don't mind.
- Mind? Not at all.
How are things?
Flat.
Skol!
Nice place. Had it long?
Not too long. It's convenient.
The firm owns it. Came to us by mistake.
Nice mistake.
One tries to see
that one's mistakes usually are.
I always feel
as if there's one more corner to turn...
and I'll be there.
- And so you will.
- Then there'll be another.
That's the attraction of corners.
I do love Robert, you know.
Why not?
My goodness, what a bit of luck.
- You're a clever girl.
- My lucky day.
- What the hell are you doing?
- What the hell am I doing?
Sitting in the dark?
Admiring the view.
Good for you.
Sorry I'm so late. The car got towed away.
Did it?
Bloody meters.
- Had to go miles to get it back.
- Poor you.
I would've been back sooner,
if it hadn't been for that.
Where did you have to go?
I don't know.
The taxi took me. I just know it took hours.
Did you have to pay? I mean, to get it out?
You always have to pay
to get a car out, don't you?
What sort of day have you had?
Quiet.
What kept you?
- Told you. I had to get the car...
- I mean so that you overshot the meter.
I didn't go to my audition.
I went to my agent instead.
And I think I've got a job coming up
in Paris soon.
What's that for?
Getting the car out.
Where would I be without you?
Of course, Miles was the perfect guide...
because he knew Paris
on every possible level.
You know, the tourist level...
then he could take one inside and
show one how sophisticated people live.
We went to a fabulous wedding, I remember.
Chloe Campbell, the film actress,
had remarried Toto Damiano.
You know, the American manganese heir.
And afterwards, we went on
to the most extraordinary place with them.
There were astonishing people.
Terribly sophisticated
and sort of emotionally inquisitive...
which is a marvelous thing, really.
- Are you English?
- Yes.
She's beautiful. She lives in England?
- Yes.
- Yes?
- And how are you?
- Okay.
One of yours?
I thought I recognized the rivets.
You're improving.
Miles, I love you. You're such a...
Billie, if I didn't know you were a man,
I'd be very shocked.
Diana, darling,
I want you to meet Billie Castiglione.
He's one of the best sculptresses in Paris.
He's dying to do your bust.
I'm going to kill that man, I am.
You've got a beautiful head.
Wonderful bones.
- Truly.
- Thank you.
It's very hot in here.
She's got an interesting head.
Un peu de home movies.
Music, please.
- This is going to be fun.
- What is it?
It's kind of a truth game, sort of.
- Come. You play with me.
- No, I don't know how to do it.
You mustn't be shy.
Everybody's doing it. Come with me.
When the music stops, the cradle will rock.
That's the truth game!
Why, Diana Scott, how you've changed.
Why, darling, it's only because
I've had a little too much sun ray.
I don't understand.
Is he pretending to be me?
You're home and dry.
I don't understand francais.
How many times?
Relax. Don't be frightened, it's fun.
Will you come on a cruise with me to...
Only if I have the top berth.
What would you do
to be in my next film, Diana?
I don't know the name for it,
but I'll definitely do it.
- Why is he doing this?
- It's fun.
Miles. My dear fellow,
I'd know you anywhere.
Tell me, do you love Diana?
No.
- Is she good in bed, Miles?
- I haven't noticed.
I am.
Bravo.
Does she love you?
Like a prisoner loves a jailer...
'cause I carry a big bunch of keys.
Oh, shut up!
Miles, my love, have you ever been in love?
Yes, for as long as I can remember.
With myself.
Tell me, Miles...
if you could be anything in the world,
what would you most want to be?
A pimp in a royal whorehouse.
Will Mr. And Mrs. Harper
please contact the General Enquiry desk?
- There you are.
- Thank you.
- Is this all your luggage?
- Yes, it is.
- Have you read this before?
- Yes.
- Have you anything to declare?
- Only her lunch.
I have a personal call from Paris
for Monsieur Robert Gold...
Western-7655.
I just couldn't help myself.
I mean, all I wanted to do, really,
was not hurt Robert, you know?
That was the main thing.
I kept thinking to myself, you know,
Miles would sort of burn itself out...
and that meanwhile all that mattered
was trying to make sure nobody got hurt.
That was the main thing.
Taxi!
- Good luck with Robert.
- Goodbye.
- Is he really a crook?
- Most certainly is.
He's just served five years. I've done
an interview with him for Sunday's program.
It's already in the can.
And Number 24, Man's Head in a Bucket.
The strongest echoes of Grunvald.
He's got a fantastically lean
and hungry look.
- Is it true he's so tremendous in bed?
- I'm afraid I didn't get around to asking him.
- Alex, darling.
- Diana, sweetie.
- How terribly to see you.
- Terribly to see you.
I say, isn't this awfully!
Come and meet Ralphie
before he disappears.
For another five years.
In the great tradition of silent screams...
Goya, Gogol, Guernica, that tradition.
Roughly what I said in the interview
I did for the program on Sunday.
- Tremendous fire.
- I'm with you. Tremendous fire.
And a furious lyricism one so seldom finds
in white chaps these days.
Quite so, yes.
A cobbler's all that is,
one man responsible...
Ralphie, dear, I've got someone here
who's dying to meet you.
- Ralphie Riggs, you must meet Diana Scott.
- How do you do?
I do so admire your work.
I think it's wonderful.
Thank you very much, I'm sure.
Come and meet the agents. Steps.
You got here. I'm so glad.
- Blasted artists.
- Don't say that, he's tremendously talented.
When did you get in?
This afternoon. I'm exhausted.
- This afternoon?
- Yes.
- Naturally, of course.
- Yes, naturally, of course.
Look at him. Don't you think
he's tremendously talented?
- And the job? How did that go?
- Tremendous fire.
- What job?
- The job you went to Paris to see about.
I had to do a test for Raoul Maxim.
He's a tremendous talent, Raoul.
There's no one in England
to beat these French directors.
Tremendous fire.
- Yes, I think so. Tremendous.
- And you went down well?
Like a dozen oysters, I think.
- Taxi!
- We're not taking a taxi.
- Why not?
- I don't take whores in taxis.
What do you mean?
That's what you are, isn't it?
A little whore, isn't it?
You've been back from Paris
two days already.
If you don't want me knowing
what you're doing...
don't leave your ticket and passport
lying all over the place.
I knew you'd get the wrong end of the stick...
Your idea of fidelity is not having
more than one man in bed at the same time.
You're a whore, baby, that's all.
Just a whore.
And I don't take whores in taxis.
Now what?
- A pound's not enough.
- What do you mean?
- Wait a minute...
- Don't you give me, "Wait a minute."
A pound's not enough!
- Don't be a...
- Don't you lean on me.
It was kinky before, and it's kinky now.
And a pound's not enough.
Makes a lot of promises.
Typical, when he's had his way.
You're not worth
more than a bloody quid, anyway.
I'm an honest working girl.
5 in the Walworth Road,
that's about your bloody mark!
You crumb!
You greasy crumb!
5 in the Walworth Road?
- What were you doing in Paris?
- Working.
- Hope you got more than 5.
- I should think I did. I wasn't with you.
- Fine. Help yourself.
- Quelle largesse. I'm impressed.
You bitch. You filthy little bitch.
Enjoy yourself.
You've got no right to call me anything.
- I have every right to call you everything.
- Have you? We're not married!
At least, not to each other.
I can't believe anyone as trivial
and shallow as you can cause so much pain.
Blameless Gold.
If you really want to know,
I've stuck it out as long as I can.
- And just about as often as you can.
- You're so faithful and loving, aren't you?
Look at this place, this rattrap.
I'm not going to be a prisoner any longer.
- So you're the prisoner, are you?
- Yes!
Prying in my life,
looking in my handbag, spying on me!
Quickest way of getting to know you.
You never intended to stay here!
You've done nothing with this place!
Look at it!
- Books. My God, how I hate books!
- Stop that.
That gets to you, doesn't it?
Anybody touching your books!
They matter to you more than anybody.
What the hell are you doing?
- Don't be so melodramatic.
- Excuse me.
You're not going.
It just all seemed so unnecessary,
these dramas.
I couldn't help feeling Robert had been
desperately unreasonable about it all.
After all,
we were supposed to be adult people.
One just had to take a grip on oneself,
that was all.
I just knew the only possible hope...
was just to fling oneself
absolutely madly into one's work.
It was either that, or the old gas oven.
One, two. Happy.
Better. The happiest girl in the world, now.
That's it. Good.
I want a happy girl. Better. Brighter.
Laugh. Good.
Swing your hair around suddenly.
That's it. Good. Lovely. Again.
Good. That's it, darling. Done.
Think lovely thoughts. Brighter. Come on.
Forget it, we've all been through it.
For Christ's sakes, smile, love!
All right, that's it.
All right. Sorry.
It's all over now.
You're doing good. Marvelous.
Listen, darling. Drink your booze.
Drink this, love. Come on.
- Malcolm!
- Gonna be a happy girl?
You're gonna be happy.
'Cause you really are a very pretty girl.
Very good.
Could we have a look at that again?
Thank you so much.
The question is, is she overexposed?
Sorry. Have the public
seen too much of her face?
How can they see too much of this face?
- We do get continuity of image.
- Good thinking.
- Buy her then, do you, Kurt?
- Definitely.
She's got a sort of Aryan quality.
She'd go down extremely well in Germany.
How about this for the Happiness Girl?
Kurt, you must have a look at this.
- For the German territory, I'm happy.
- There it is.
We want you to be the Happiness Boy, Kurt.
Gentlemen, please.
Very well, then. We're all agreed.
Diana Scott...
hereinafter known as the Happiness Girl.
For you. The man who turned the tide
at Monte Carlo.
Darling, bless you.
Can I help you, madam?
Yes. Do you think I could see
some peaches in brandy, please?
Certainly, madam,
if you'd just come this way.
- Have you got a larger size I could see?
- Yes, madam. Just wait one moment.
Brandy. Expensive,
but I think they look far too expensive.
It looks delicious to me...
I am not with you.
I have never seen you before.
You're in this up to your navel.
We can't stay here all day, you know.
Thank you, madam.
No, I did want them in a bottle.
No, thank you very much. We'll forget it.
Thank you, madam.
These look very nice.
What about these prawns?
They look delicious.
Did you see that?
I could have sworn
that man was following us.
He was!
- Outrageous!
- Oh, dear. Robert!
Rule Britannia! Britannia
Oh, my dear!
- Ting-a-ling, shop's open.
- Ting-a-ling, shop's denuded.
Honestly, you are outrageous,
and I would like you to know...
that we have only paid for
Smoggin's Shrimps.
What's that?
The Happiness Girl contract, already?
Oh, dear, my husband wants a divorce.
My husband, Tony. He wants a divorce.
Granted soon as asked, I'm sure.
I hate this flat.
You've got your escargot, then.
Have an avocado strangled with prawns.
Have a bit of smoked salmon,
stuffed with caviar...
matured in fine English gin.
For what you are about to receive,
may the Lord make you truly thankful.
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
Why is life such a piss pot?
- I have the answer to that.
- Have you?
It's the bomb, lovey. It must be.
That's right, it's the great, big...
The great, big, nasty bomb!
Let's face it, dear.
Darling's life is a great big steaming mess.
I love you. No one else does.
- No one else does.
- Poor you.
I'll tell you what I'm going to do with you.
I may be filming in Italy next month.
Italy? Fabulous, darling.
I'm very glad for you.
And if I do...
I'm going afterwards
on the most wonderful holiday of my life.
And you're coming with me.
- I am?
- You are.
To hell with them all!
We're going to have a ball!
Have a ball.
To hell with them all!
"Ashes to ashes.
"Dust to dust."
Yes, there's nothing dreamier
than Cupid Chocolates.
Those fairy-tale centers
take you out of this world...
into a land of make-believe come true.
- Cut it.
- Cut it.
- How was the view?
- Not bad, could be better.
- Listen, l...
- I'm a bit worried about the caress.
Could he caress her this time?
The jingle does say:
"The one you love to caress."
It's talking about the girl.
We'll try that.
Darling, this time
would you let him caress you?
Would you let him touch your cheek?
- I caress...
- No, he caresses you.
- All right? Please don't break it up.
- Come on, boys.
Let's try a take for the Prince.
Good afternoon, sir.
Hello. How do you do? Excuse me...
don't you think the house would be
much better seen from this angle, here?
Yes, sir, but you see,
it's a question of the lights.
The lights.
Scene 2, take 3.
Action.
"Yes, there's nothing dreamier
than Cupid Chocolates.
"Those fairy-tale centers
take you out of this world...
"into a land of make-believe come true.
"As those fairy-tale centers
melt in the mouth...
"they'll melt the heart
of the one you love to caress.
"Fairy-tale chocolates..."
He is the Pope Urban.
One of my father's many ancestors.
Should popes be ancestors?
The call came late in life. He was
an ancestor before becoming a pope.
I don't see much resemblance.
He was better-looking
when he was younger.
- Who is she?
- My mother.
She was very beautiful.
Was?
She died two years ago in a car crash.
How awful.
- Very awful.
- Here you are.
- I've ordered some tea.
- How marvelous.
Curzio's been giving me
some of the family history.
Oh, yes.
Excuse me, I must go.
I have a long way to drive.
But I hope we will meet again.
- I hope so.
- Goodbye.
- Till soon, then.
- Till soon.
He's a nice boy, Curzio.
Yes, very.
- It's so beautiful.
- I'm glad you like it.
- There's nothing like this in England.
- Thank you.
But England has the most beautiful
country houses in the world.
Have a chocolate.
No, it's different here. There's a sense of...
eternity.
A sort of peacefulness.
It's almost religious,
if you know what I mean.
Yes?
It seems to make life easier to bear.
But you don't have any problem
in bearing the weight of life, do you?
I don't know about that.
On you, it must weigh very lightly.
For me, it's different.
I recently lost someone, too.
Not like you did, but...
I don't much care
to go back to England just now.
- You have a family?
- Not like yours.
Not that supports one, gives one strength.
You have God practically in the family.
Every man is alone, in the last resolve.
And I more than most men.
Perhaps not, in some ways.
- They're beautiful.
- Yes. Like their mother.
They are. They really are lovely.
Now you must excuse me.
I swim with them every day.
It's a duty which is also a pleasure.
- Excuse me, will you?
- Of course. Thank you so much.
I don't think I'd ever in my life needed
a holiday quite so much as I did then.
And Capri was ideal.
I just wanted peace and quiet,
and just to get away from everything.
Campari?
We are not complicating our holiday
with any disgusting sexcapades.
- Brother and sister, till death us do part?
- Done. Share and share alike.
- Everything split down the middle.
- Absolutely.
- Now, tell us what's new in London.
- Nothing much.
I'll tell you who I did bump into
the other day. Robert.
- My Robert?
- The same.
- And?
- Seemed okay.
- Alone?
- Me or him?
- You think I care who you were with?
- Charming.
- Do you care who he was with?
- Not particularly.
- What was she like?
- Blonde, 21...
and extremely well-appointed, as they say.
It's okay. He was alone.
- He wasn't.
- Swear.
- You rotten...
- Thing, you. I know.
- Happy holiday.
- And you, principe. And you.
Look! What a dream!
I was just thinking how nice it'd be
if we could live here.
I could do without sex.
Don't really like it that much.
I could just feel...
complete.
Mal, let's buy this place. It can't cost much.
It'd be marvelous.
I want it more than anything
in the whole world.
Happy, girl?
- Morning.
- Morning.
Traitor.
Why the harsh words?
Harsh word. One is sufficient.
Darling, really.
"Brother and sister, till death us do part."
I happened to be passing,
so I thought, "Why not drop in?"
Why not, indeed?
- I've been thinking about you a lot.
- That's nice.
- And what you said.
- Did I say something?
Yes, about Italy.
- How much you like it.
- I simply adore it.
Curzio is very taken with you, you know.
He's very young.
He recognizes a certain quality in you.
- I expect he'll get over it.
- I don't think so.
He was very much in favor
of my coming here.
As a matter of fact,
he persuaded me to come.
- Why? I'm afraid I don't understand.
- To propose to you.
But why couldn't he have proposed himself?
I mean, it's all ridiculously childish, but...
Curzio approved that
I should propose to you, since...
it is I who wishes to marry you.
I see.
There is no point
in not saying what is in one's heart.
No, really, Principe.
I'm staying here until tomorrow.
Will you think it over?
I thought about it all last night.
I hardly slept at all, Cesare, thinking.
I know I can't give up my life.
You understand?
If you ever change your mind,
I shall not have changed mine.
I am very sorry I gave you a sleepless night.
I too had one. Goodbye.
Goodbye, Cesare.
Bye-bye, Principe.
When they bury
Walter Southgate tomorrow...
there will be buried with him something of
the regional tradition of English literature.
Nowadays it is London
which more and more devours the talents.
"London. That damn jam factory...
"boiling out the goodness from writers."
As Southgate once said to me.
A certain flinty integrity has gone.
Perhaps forever.
Good night.
And that's all from us for this week.
We'll be back with you again
with another program in a fortnight's time.
Till then, good night.
Ice?
Where did all the young flowers go?
Proceed. Amuse me.
I wondered if you knew Southgate had died.
Could I...
What's going on?
I think you'd better go.
Get out of here, will you!
Just get out of here!
I thought you'd gone, too.
You bastard.
You really are, aren't you? A bastard?
- Would you like some tea?
- Tea?
To calm you down.
You seem a bit hysterical.
I asked you to go. Why haven't you?
Because I've stayed.
- What is it?
- Nothing.
You're afraid of something?
I get the feeling you're afraid of something.
What's wrong?
Wrong?
Nothing.
I didn't ask you to leave Robert, you know.
You never asked me to do anything.
As long as you realize.
As long as you realize I just hate your guts.
As long as you realize Robert's the only one
I ever loved! As long as you realize that.
When you've finished...
as long as you're convinced,
you don't have to persuade me, my darling.
Are you afraid I'll kill myself?
Has that ever happened to you?
Who was she, Miles?
Put away your Penguin Freud, Diana.
- Who was she?
- And your crystal ball.
It's late.
Poor Miles.
You can't risk feeling anything, can you?
- I shall survive.
- Of course. As long as you remain impotent.
My impotence, my darling,
makes a pair with your virginity.
Impotent in every way, except in bed.
Don't underestimate me, my dear.
I can also be very effective on the phone.
I'll say good night.
Life's full of "if onlys," isn't it?
You know, if only, if only.
If only Robert had come half an hour later,
the whole thing might've been different.
I sort of felt it wasn't any good...
but I just had to go
and try and find him again.
I remember thinking,
"I bet he'll be at that funeral."
"The days of man are but as grass...
"for he flourishes as a flower of the field.
"For as soon as the wind goeth over it,
it is gone...
"and the place thereof
shall know it no more.
"We commend unto thine hands of mercy,
most merciful Father...
"the soul of this, our brother,
Walter Southgate departed.
"And we commit his body to the ground...
"earth to earth, ashes to ashes,
and dust to dust...
"in the sure and certain hope
of the resurrection to eternal life...
"through our Lord Jesus Christ...
"who shall change the body
of our low estate...
"that it be like unto his glorious..."
- Miss Scott?
- Yes.
- Lesley Page, Union Standard.
- Yes.
- I didn't know you knew Walter Southgate.
- Yes.
- We were considerable friends, actually.
- When was this?
About two years ago.
He found out
how much I admired his work...
and, sweet man,
he invited me round to see him.
Which was your favorite book?
All of them.
As a matter of fact,
I may be filming one of his books in Paris.
Really?
Yes, I was talking to Raoul Maxim,
French film director.
Yes, Robert.
Who's Robert?
Who is that? Malcolm, is that you?
I rang to congratulate you.
I just read the paper about the film.
Who is that?
That is Diana Scott, isn't it?
Yes, it is. Will you tell me
who is speaking, please?
Please, who is that speaking?
Come on, now. We met at a party.
For God's sake! Who is it?
For Christ's sake, stop mucking around.
Tell me who's speaking.
I just felt I had absolutely no one to turn to.
No one to turn to.
Nothing to fall back on, you know.
Suddenly, there was someone who
understood, who really cared about me.
Didn't want anything out of me.
He was so terribly understanding,
Father Chapman.
Do you know him?
He's Monsignor Chapman now.
He's a terrible sweetie. Terribly human.
I suppose I've always believed in God.
There just has to be a God, doesn't there?
You know, somebody who understands.
Just has to be.
I really took it very seriously, you know.
I knew I couldn't go ahead
with my marriage...
unless I was really serious about it.
It isn't every day
that we have a new English princess.
But it happened last week
at the ancient home...
of the Prince Cesare de la Romita...
when our own Diana Scott
became the bride...
of this famous Italian prince
and bobsleigh enthusiast.
Everyone was there. Old family friends,
the people from the estate.
My goodness, how happy they were
to find themselves with a mistress again.
The Prince, who stems
from one of Italy's oldest families...
has been married before
and has seven children.
It isn't every princess who finds herself
the mother of seven on her wedding day.
Simple family meals are something
the Princess is determined to maintain.
She intends to supervise
all the family cooking...
and she is a regular and welcome visitor
to the kitchens.
The Princess has always loved country life.
She herself comes from Sussex.
And she and the Prince aim to spend
plenty of time in the open air.
The Princess hopes to be a friend
to all sorts and conditions of men...
not least, those less fortunate
and less gifted than herself.
Princess Diana is radiantly confident...
that she can make
a real and meaningful contribution...
to her new family and to her new country.
We wish auguri,
good wishes in her new language...
to a new Italian princess, who will, to us...
always remain a British one as well.
- Are you all right, my darling?
- I'm fine.
- Did you understand what I said to Palucci?
- Enough.
I'm sorry, but I must go to Rome.
My meeting is tomorrow morning.
And tonight?
I'll go and see my mother.
You know I must go and see my mother.
Next time you must come with me,
but just now Rome is not amusing.
Yes, I know.
- Lf you need anything...
- It's all right. I have plenty to do.
I'll be back on Thursday, probably Friday.
So take care of yourself.
- Bye, darling.
- Bye-bye.
Say good night to your mother.
Quickly, now.
Good night.
I'll send the car for you at 12:00.
Enjoy yourselves.
Thank you.
- My husband's mother?
- Yes, Principessa.
Have you her phone number?
The Principessa had the instrument removed
some years ago, Principessa.
So my husband
is not obtainable at all tonight?
One could send a telegram, Principessa.
That's the only means
whereby you can get in contact?
That is so, Principessa.
Thank you, Signor Palucci.
- Are you a resident in this country?
- No, in Italy.
- Did you buy presents while abroad?
- No, just personal luggage.
- No perfume?
- Nothing at all.
- You realize that perfume is dutiable?
- Yes, I haven't got any with me.
No, it's just all personal.
You've bought nothing at all,
no cigarettes or spirits?
I've got nothing to declare.
Hello.
I didn't know whether you'd come.
I was always easily seduced...
especially by telegrams.
I hoped you would be.
- You look older.
- You don't.
Come on, I hate to stand here.
This is a miracle.
We're still a couple.
I thought maybe, after all this time,
something would have changed.
It hasn't.
We are?
Aren't we?
Thank God, it's never too late.
Two people really belong to each other.
Doesn't matter what happens.
This time, darling,
let's get somewhere in the country.
Away from all this London racket.
Somewhere quiet, where you can write.
We've both learned our lesson
and won't make any more mistakes.
I know we can be so happy.
We're not going back to anything,
you know.
This was just for old times' sake.
Porter, please.
- What are you doing?
- Porter, will you get London airport...
and reserve me one seat
on any flight this afternoon to Rome?
- That's right.
- What the hell are you doing?
- Princess de la Romita.
- Would you spell that?
- R-O-M...
- Robert, put down that phone!
Give me that phone!
What are doing? Stop it!
You are going back to Rome.
I'm not going back to Rome. I'll cancel that.
Give me that phone!
Get up, and get dressed.
You bastard!
You just used me.
You used me. It's a moot point. Get dressed.
My God, I hate you.
It's not true, Robert.
I love you. You know I love you.
What are you doing?
Please, I've come all this way...
Get dressed, and I'll take you to the airport.
I've come all this way because I love you.
Don't throw it away. I need you.
- Please, it was such a...
- Will you get dressed?
Just give us one more chance, I beg of you.
Let's spend a week together.
- It won't hurt to try a week.
- I don't have a week.
I don't see how you can throw away
something that meant so much to us.
It doesn't put me off, you know.
Being vile to me doesn't put me off.
It puts me off.
- It disgusts me.
- What does?
To hear myself.
To hear the way I want to treat you.
I don't want to feel like this
a moment longer than I have to.
We can't just go like this.
You'd be surprised.
You're in love with someone else, is that it?
- Going back with your wife?
- On the contrary.
She wants to divorce me
to marry someone else.
- Well?
- Isn't that good news?
If there isn't anyone else,
what are you going to do?
I'm going to a small American university...
to read, to lecture...
You'll hate it.
I shall like it. It's what I want to do.
- I shall write.
- What will you write about?
I'll write about you...
about myself,
about my wife and my children.
They played quite large parts, you know.
I played the largest part.
Certainly the most dramatic.
- Robert, stop the car.
- No.
- I won't go to Rome.
- You're going to Rome.
- I'll kill myself.
- All right, kill yourself.
- I will, I swear I will.
- So, do.
I didn't say I wanted to go with you.
If I can't be with you,
I don't want to be alive!
Like hell.
It's true!
All lies are true at the time.
Porter.
Yes, madam?
Get my suitcases in the back.
Announcing the arrival
of British Overseas Airways...
Flight 262 from Lagos and Frankfurt.
What actually is the purpose
of your visit here?
Don't know how you even found out
I was in England.
Any special reason?
My mother hasn't been very well.
I came over to see her.
And no other reason?
Isn't one's mother enough reason?
Are you happy in Italy, Principessa?
I'm as happy as anyone could possibly be.
Are you likely to
resume your career soon, Principessa?
I have a family now.
That gives me all I could possibly want.