Mister Professor!
Breakfast!
These cigars...
everything smells.
The old man is coming!
Sit down!
Angst! Come here!
Rub that out!
- But, Mister Professor...
- Be quiet! Sit down!
Now, let's see
what else you learned.
Hamlet, Act III scene 1.
Edmund!
Na, na, na?
To be...?
To be, or not to be.
To be, or not to be...
That is the...
Halt!
Wrong!
You are evidently dissatisfied with the
accepted pronunciation of the verb "the"!
The!
The.
The!
The.
The.
The.
The.
Say it out loud now.
Goddamn lazy bum!
Sit down!
Copy books!
Now, gentlemen, write
the verb 'the'!
Two hundred times!
Stempel!
Sit down!
We will talk about this later!
Inside!
Sit here!
Sit down!
You too!
My best pupil!
Mister Profess..
Quiet!
Look at me!
Where did you get those photos?
I,... I don't know.
Speak in English!
And don't lie to me!
Where did you get those photos?
Someone must have put them
in my books.
So,.. so, and you want me
to believe that?
At night?
Do not go where at night?
The whole class go every night
to the "Blue Angel".
Where?
The "Blue Angel".
"Blue Angel"?
"Der Blaue Engel"?
Leave now!
We'll talk later!
Here!
Come here, Lola!
Here's the cash!
Guys, tonight
I'm gonna get a man
A man, a real man
Stop!
Stay where you are!
So, how did you like my bedroom?
So you are...
the artist Lola Lola?
Sorry, you'll have to talk my language...
What?
You are the actress Lola Lola?
Police officer, huh?
But allow me, my name is
Immanuel Rath...
professor
of the local school!
Then you ought to know enough
to take off your hat!
I must ask you to stop undermining
the morals of my class!
So, you have nothing else to do?
After all, professor,
you can't blame the problem, can you?
As a man of honor,
I'd better leave...
I'm compromising you.
If you behave,
you can stay.
Catch!
Well, professor, how do
you like me now?
Ha, hold your horses.
I, huh,...
where's my hat?
If you don't want to drink,
can leave!
What fruit are you
hanging out with now?
Professor?
Of English and Literature!
Doctor Immanuel Rath!
A real professor.
True professor.
Not a professor like you...
I am delighted to meet one of
the town's eminent personalities.
Why didn't you call me?
Am I the manager here or am I not?
Call you why?
Out!
Out to the stage!
Pull up your pants!
Marvelous plan!
How dare you!
I came here to fight for us!
You are harboring my students!
Students?
Yes, you are harboring
my students!
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Stay where you are!
Stop! Stop!
Stop! Stop!
Where did you leave
your hat this time?
Please, sit down.
And he didn't say a thing, huh?
Not a sound.
He's afraid of us.
I love you.
Nonsense!
Now he's so sad.
So sad.
You stupid fool!
You ruined the whole number!
Didn't I tell you to keep the kids out?
That'll do.
He's coming!
Who?
The professor!
No, no, gentlemen.
Not through the bar!
Into the basement!
Good evening, Professor!
What a pleasant surprise!
Come in, Professor!
I knew you'd come back.
They always come back to me.
I,... I only need to exchange, huh...
I forgot my hat and...
I must have completely confused it.
And you didn't come on my account?
Please sit down!
I hate it the way
Here!
How do you like my eyes?
You don't like them, huh?
Oh yes, still... beautiful.
Your temper seems to have improved
since yesterday.
I'm afraid I was
a little, huh,...
...excited
Hmm, you had scared me to death!
Pardon!
Be careful, Mister Professor,
don't let one over.
Now you're entirely a mess!
Steady!
Come on! Let's go to work!
You know,...
...you know,
you're not at all bad looking...
O, poor baby!
Poor baby!
Mama's little pet, oo,...
Did I hurt you?
Nein, euh... No.
Feel a bit better?
Ja, euh... Yes.
Mama's little pet...
Why are there no drinks
being served?
He must be rich enough.
What?
Yes, yes, yes,...
You cannot continue like this.
There's a sailor
out there and his wallet is bursting.
Why are you telling me?
Send Guste!
Are you crazy? It's for you!
Nothing doing... I'm an actor!
Not a champagne cooler!
You have to
a conception of your profession.
Good evening!
my dear.
Thomas, captain of the John Thomas.
Just came in form Calcutta.
From my cargo!
Leave me alone!
Get out of here!
Are you crazy?
He ordered champagne.
But I'm not going to have you...
Uncivilized brute! Get out!
Is it your papa?
How dare you molest this lady?
Do you have a subscription
to "this lady"?
But Professor,...
Silence! Shut up!
I'll take care of this.
Out! Out!
But Professor! Who do
you think you are?
Miserable procurer!
You have no right...
How can you throw out this customer?
This man ordered champagne!
I'll pay for everything!
Get out!
He called me an uncivilized brute.
They want to throw me out of here...!
I only performed my duty.
Now, don't get excited, Professor.
They didn't stay very long.
Here's how...
Cheers!
Excuse me, Professor,
but the police are here.
The police?
I think you'd better beat it, Professor.
I hope they get along
down there...
The gentleman claims
he was assaulted here.
I can't understand a word.
What did he say?
He claims someone hits somebody.
He wanted to kill me...
kill me!
Who did?
Where is he then?
Where is that rascal?
Disappeared!
Arrest this one, officer.
He attacked me on the stage!
Sure. Leave me alone
with that nonsense.
Where are you hiding,
you rascal?
What is it you want?
You devil!
I wasn't even here.
I've finally got you.
Get out of here!
Your time has come!
Get out of here.
You too!
Brats!
That's him!
He wanted to kill me, officer!
Arrest him!
Excuse me, Professor...
He insulted me.
This man wants
to press charges against you.
Very well!
I will press charges, too!
What do you mean,
"press charges"? Arrest him!
- Be quiet!
- Nobody'll make me shut up!
We'll see to that.
Off to the police station!
He tried to kill me.
" Uncivilized brute", he called me!
I won't put up with this!
I assume you realize
the consequences
of this incident for you.
Take that cigarette
out of your mouth!
Do you hear me?
Away with that cigarette!
Confess!
What did you come here for?
The same as you, Professor.
Get out!
You haven't heard
the last of this!
Fine job, Professor!
Here, have a drink!
"Garbage"!
Miserable wretches!
You haven't heard the last of this!
You haven't...
For God's sake,
what's wrong, Professor?
I'll be all right.
I'm better already.
Those hooligans!
You've chosen a fine profession!
You shouldn't get so upset.
Damn that bell!
What's going on here?
The place is half empty already!
Quit complaining!
Who brought the Captain in?
All right, get going!
Come on out, Professor.
And listen.
It'll make you feel better.
You gave me quite a punch...
but I'm not the kind
to bear a grudge.
Professor, I'll get you
some special medicine...
from my personal pharmacy.
Put this behind your necktie!
You really think this will help?
Of course! It'll put
some marrow in your bones!
Really?
Was it delicious?
Yes.
Now you're presentable again.
Come with me.
Why?
Come out with me.
For which reason?
Don't you want
to hear Lola sing?
Ladies and gentlemen!
It gives me great pleasure to present to you
our guest of honor,
Dr. Immanuel Rath,
Professor of the local high school!
Pleased to meet you, Professor!
Falling in love again
Never wanted to
What's a girl to do?
Can't help it...
Love's always been my game
play it how I may
I was made that way
Can't help it...
Men flutter to me
like moths around a flame
and if their wings burn
I know I'm not to blame
Falling in love again
Never wanted to
I just can't help it...
Falling in love again
Never wanted to
what's a girl to do?
Can't help it.
Love's always been my game
play it how I may
I was made that way
Can't help it
Men flutter to me
like moths around a flame
and if their wings burn,
I know I am not to blame
Falling in love again
never wanted to
what's a girl to do?
can't help it...
"DO RIGHT AND FEAR NO ONE"
Professor!
Breakfast!
Morning, Immanuel!
Gute Morgen, huh,...
Good morning.
Breakfast, Professor!
Come on, darling.
The coffee gets cold.
Sit down.
Do you always snore, sweetheart?
I think I drank a little bit
too much last night.
Really? I wish I had your capacity...
One?
Two?
Three.
My, my... Sugar daddy...
Good?
Wunderbar... Marvelous!
See? You could have
this every day.
Why not?
I'm still a bachelor.
I have to go to school.
What did you say?
The school!
Hold still!
Here you are.
To remember me by...
Aren't you going to say goodbye to me?
Give me a kiss.
Do you love me?
Don't you?
Yes, yes! Sure, sure!
See you!
Morning, Professor!
Good morning.
Sit down!
Good morning, Professor!
I'll have you all put in jail!
Miserable brats!
Leave the classroom!
I'm sorry, my friend,...
...but you've left me no choice.
I must request your resignation.
Hello, Professor!
Don't you have anything to do?
Why did I ever marry you!
I've asked that myself.
Why are you standing around?
You know the way now.
Hello!
Awfully nice of you to
come and say goodbye!
My dear Miss Lola...
I...
Oh! What beautiful flowers!
Thank you!
Don't be so sad...
I'll be back next year.
Young Miss Lola,
if you permit me...
...to offer this too.
And may I also ask you to be my wife?
Wife?
Yes.
Oh, you're so sweet!
I hope you realize
the importance of this hour.
Ladies and gentlemen!
I will permit myself...
Won't you be quiet
for just five minutes?
Now the tears are going to be turned on.
Exactly like my own wedding.
If I had only had known you then...
instead of this 'magician'...
perhaps I'd be the wife
of a Professor instead of...
Now he's going to
Sit down!
And shut up!
All your wailing won't prevent me
from giving the professor...
a demonstration of my art.
Mister Professor,...
I will now commit myself...
to extract a few eggs
from your nose.
You see I have nothing concealed in my hands!
Attention please, Professor.
Watch me closely.
Sweetheart, let me have my suitcase.
You'll never make a living that way.
What's this?
Postcards, milord.
Of Mrs. Professor...
We sell them by the carload.
As long as I have a penny,
...these postcards will not be sold!
Pick them up anyway.
They may get dirty.
How's the business?
Two postcards...
Cheap crowd!
Cheap crowd?
He's got dirt.
Let him better take a shave!
You'd better look.
We're not at school!
You can't blame him.
You might get yourself cleaned up.
Anyway, you have no cause
to call the house a cheap crowd.
They give us a living,...
Yeah...
...a living...
...a fine living.
If you don't like it,
you can go.
I can go... I can go...
I'm through
I know I'm through!
I can't stand it anymore!
Get me my stockings.
Quickly, quick!
My curling iron!
It's too hot!
Well, Professor,
how are we today?
How about a cigar?
Havana...
You seem to be in an especially
good mood today, Director.
I am!
But you should be, too.
Leave him alone.
Stop making fun of him!
Be quiet!
Your husband is to become
a big attraction!
Here. Contract.
Settled by wire.
And where?
In the "Blue Angel"!
- "Blue Angel"?
- Yes.
Back to your old hometown.
Think Professor.
Professor Immanuel Rath!
Never!
I won't go back!
You'll change your mind.
I'll never change my mind!
O really?!
For five years you've supported
that good-for-nothing...
and now that he can make a living,
he says no.
Stop it! He'll go.
I won't go!
Tomorrow morning. 9 o'clock.
We leave!
I can't go! I won't go!
I can't go...!
Don't get excited.
No! No!
Do with me what you want...!
That's something I won't do...
You won't have to go...
No! No! No!
I won't go!
I won't go!
Never!
Personal appearance of
Professor Immanuel Rath
Gentlemen!
Please go home quietly!
Everything is sold out!
This is the most important moment of
your whole career.
If everything goes well,
you're a made man!
Gala in Berlin,
perhaps London,
Tinsel!
Hippodrome, New York!
That's enough!
You want to get him all worked up!
We're at the "Blue Angel".
Don't be a killjoy!
And what do you think you're doing?
Do something useful...
Where's the nose?
The nose?
Yes, the nose!
Where did it go?
Chairs... more chairs!
Chairs! Are there any more chairs?
Standing room only!
Don't get excited, Mister Professor!
Don't get excited!
Be calm! Please! Oh, wonderful...
He's right.
Keep cool like I am...
Just don't get excited!
Don't let yourself get nervous!
Just watch me!
You'll be alright!
Great night for you!
Put it over!
When I see a beautiful woman,
it is a moi.
That is my reputation.
What's wrong?
Why the long face?
Every time I feel good
you stage upon the action!
A little domestic affair?
Ahh...!
Don't be sad!
Be like me!
Adelbert Mazeppa,
the strong man.
Better say goodnight,
that's your third cue!
A little drink?
Voil!
Your husband is very crazy.
He's mad!
Where are you hiding?
What's wrong with you?
Come on stage then!
Lola, come down!
I will not go on!
What's wrong with you now?
You can't cut a month of business!
A minister first class...
What happened to you?
Are you mad?
You've got to go on!
Put on his wig!
What do you say?
You don't want to go on?
- Of course...
- Are you crazy altogether...?
- Leave it to me...
- I won't have any of this stuff...
Go out!
And quickly!
Where's the professor?
I can see,
Ladies and gentlemen,
that no further
introduction is necessary...
I will not try your patience any longer...
I have the great honor
to present our beloved
Professor Immanuel Rath!
Come on, come on...!
Ladies and gentlemen,
may I introduce...
August,
my best student!
My dear Ladies and Gentlemen,
You can plainly see that I receive
no external aid whatsoever,
but work only with my two hands,
my ten fingers...
What I now show you,
my dear Ladies and Gentlemen,
...is an ordinary top hat.
without secret door,
without double bottom.
This hat...
my dear Ladies and Gentlemen,
I will now put upon
the head of my August,
and will permit myself to
draw out a living pigeon!
My dear Ladies and Gentlemen,
I know that you think
the magician has already
clipped the pigeon into the hat...
Oh no.
Nothing what you thought.
Please. Empty...
Empty. All empty!
Another proof that the hat is empty...
I have here an ordinary field dagger...
One...
Two...
Three...
Four
My dear Ladies and gentlemen,
do not be startled by the gun
what you now see in my right hand.
Hopla!
And now has my August
This is disgusting!
Call the police!
Mr. Sorcerer,
My eggs are all gone...
Would you lay a few for me...?
Why... Of course, Director.
Of course I can. With great pleasure.
My dear Ladies and Gentlemen,
I will now permit myself
to extract a few eggs from the nose of...
...my August.
Gather your wits together, August!
You were once a professor!
Perhaps you're under the impression
that August has the eggs hidden in his hat.
Quite wrong!
Another pigeon...
The eggs!
Where are the eggs?
Very good,
ladies and gentlemen.
at once, our model's
prompt service.
One... two... three...
An egg!
Where's
your "Cock-a-doodle-do"?
An egg!
A good, fresh-laid egg!
Please!
Lay more eggs!
Lay more eggs!
If you don't crow this time,
I'll break you!
Once more.
One... two... three...
An egg! We think it's a real
good, freshly-laid egg!
Crow! "Cock-a-doodle-do"
Your "Cock-a-doodle-do"!
"Cock-a-doodle-do"
I'll break your neck!
"Cock-a-doodle-do"
Cock-a-doodle-do!
You idiot!
Don't you touch me!
I didn't do anything...
Get on with your number!
On to the stage...!
Was that necessary?
Falling in love again
Never wanted to
What am I to do?
Can't help it...
Love's always been my game
play it how I may
I was made that way
Can't help it...
Men flutter to me
like moths around a flame
and if their wings burn
I know I'm not to blame
Falling in love again
Never wanted to
What am I to do?
Can't help it...