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Do You Like My Basement (2012)
Hello.
I'm Stanley, Stanley Farmer. I am a filmmaker. Oh, my God, baby, what's wrong? Baby? Just tell me what's the matter! Oh, my God! Yeah? Chad, rent was due yesterday dude! Can you try and have it for me today please? Yeah, sure. Hey, asshole, I already told you I don't get paid till tomorrow! I heard that, you little prick! You know when the goddamn rent is due but, every month it's the same shit. Hey. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'll get it to you tomorrow, the latest. I promise. Okay. Just make sure you have it for me tomorrow night, latest. Yep. Hello? Hi Chad, this is Stanley... I called earlier. Oh, yes. Hi Stanley, thanks for calling, I just walked in. So I saw the footage you sent me. I was wondering when you could come along for a chat? I can come over today if you want. Today is perfect. How is 4:00? 4:00 works for me. Are there sides or is it a cold read? Actually I just want to get a sense of you, yourself, rather than a reading. So I'll just be asking you a few questions, okay? Of course, sure. It sounds great. Where are you located? Chad? Hi? I'm Stanley, I'm guessing you couldn't find the address? I just moved here so I inverted the numbers, I am so used to saying the old address. Anyway, pleased to meet you! Oh, you too. I didn't understand what you said just now, but it's okay with me. Please, come in. Take a seat. So I am making a reality-style horror film. Okay. The premise involves a man placing an ad which asks the question: "Do you like my basement?" Like this. And? People see the ad, call up to see if they can spend the night in the basement, some out of curiosity, others, more importantly, to try and win the thousand dollars, but of course terrible things happen to them once they're left alone down there. And that is where you come in. Okay. Excellent. So, first I would like us to go through a scenario beginning with you on the phone calling me in response to the ad. Do you mind I f I ask a quick question first? Sure, go ahead. Is there pay for the people who get cast? Yes, there will definitely be pay for those that are cast in the film. Okay, great. I'm sorry, I just wanted to be sure. Okay, let's imagine the phone is ringing. Hello? No, I say hello. You're calling me. Oh, I'm sorry. Please go ahead, that was... Okay, the phone is ringing. Hello? Hello, I'm calling about the basement ad? Yes? Well, I'm interested in learning more about the deal. The deal is simple. If you can spend a night in my basement, I will give you a thousand dollars in cash. And... what kind of basement is it? That's for you to find out. Well, what do I have to do? Can I ask your sexual orientation? Excuse me? I want to know if you prefer girls or boys. I like boys. Is this still part of the conversation? It's all part of the conversation. Is that what you wanted? That's fine. Could you wait here for me until I call you down? Sure. Ooh, this is creepy. I'm glad you think so. So I've always loved musical theater and that's why I'm here in the big city. And you think you have a good enough singing voice? Oh, my God, yes. The people on Broadway can't touch me. Uh-uh. Sing me a song. Really? Go ahead. I may be able to use a song somewhere. Great. So this is actually a song that I wrote when I was in a band in Atlanta. A glam rock band. I was born on a mountaintop Never saw the sun Never saw the sun Loved the earth and kissed the stars And danced in the rain And I saw you standing there Alone in the world and I thought boy... Okay, okay, good. That's enough. Please sit down. That was good. Thanks, Chad. Now, can you tell me something personal about yourself? Something personal about myself? Wh... I'll give you an example. When I was six years old, I received a large, red, plastic, Formula One racing car for Christmas. It cost my parents an arm and a leg back then and they thought I would cherish it. I had, in fact, asked for a toy robot, one that showed pictures of the moon on the front, but they ignored my request and bought me this car, which I had to sit inside of and pedal to make go. It was the most disappointing moment in my life. I understand. When I was a kid, my favorite thing to do at Christmas was to help my mom bake cookies for Santa so he and the reindeer could have a snack after delivering our presents. One Christmas, my mom burnt her mouth on a cookie hot out of the oven. I laughed 'cause I thought she was joking, and she slapped me hard in the face. It was the first time she had ever hit me. My father broke up with her shortly after that Christmas. We never made cookies again. Chad, tell me, how could you make that story better, when reciting it? Slap my mom back? Now tell me, what you are willing to do to get this part? I'll do anything. I can be at rehearsals. I have a day job, but my dedication is next to none. I'll be punctual. That's all fine, Chad. But what are you willing to do beyond the normal requirements to get the role? I'm not sure I get what you mean. It's simple. Are you willing to go beyond the normal requirements to get this role? Is there something specific you want me to do? Chad, how would you feel if the inside of this basement were to be the last thing you saw while you were alive? Well... That would be horrible. Just horrible. Okay. Let's leave it there. Well, goodbye then. Goodbye, and thank you very much for the opportunity. I know I froze down there, but I just got thrown by the atmosphere. I've never been to a casting session like this before. Well, Chad, there's never been a film quite like this before. Have a good night. Uh, Stanley! Stanley? Hi. I was actually wondering, would it be possible for you to tell me now if I got the part? I feel like I didn't get it. Well... You didn't have the reaction to the questions I was looking for, so, I'm afraid not. I can do so much better. And I just got... I froze. You know, I dropped the ball and I'm sorry, but if you let me come for a callback, I promise I won't let you down. Okay... When I do callbacks, I'll let you try again. I'll have looked at the other guys by then, anyway. Goodbye now. Thank you so much, thank you. Have a great night and, uh, it was a pleasure! Hello, this is Sylvia, leave a message. Sylvia this is Dr. Schumann. This is now the third time you haven't shown up for your appointment without canceling. I'm afraid I can't keep you on any longer as a patient. Tell your mother I said hello. Silvia. Stanley? Yes, please come in. So you're shooting the audition beginning with my arrival? Yeah, so we need to go through to the living room please, just around the corner. Take a seat. Thanks. Can I just say that I'm a little uncomfortable. One with the camera, which I'm sure I'll get used to, but mostly with the fact we seem to be alone in your apartment. Ah. I actually don't need anyone else here for the auditions and it helps create the atmosphere I'm looking for. Hmm... I can't say anymore than that, apart from I am not a psychopath, which would mean nothing if I was. I really am just a filmmaker trying to do something unique. You don't have to feel like you need to stay. Really, you're free to leave. I suppose it would help if I knew what the film was about. Of course. And I'm one of the respondents to the ad? Exactly. I love it! It's so fucked up. So can I take that as a yes? You want to stay and complete the casting session? Yeah. I'm sorry, I just got freaked out a little bit, this being New York City and all. Why do you love it? Apart from it being "fucked up?" Well, it's corny and hokey but it's also pretty sinister, I guess. This is London, Stanley, the Tower of London. It's where they used to behead people and put their heads on spikes. Ben, shut up. Don't tell him stuff like that. Here, get Stanley, look at him. What's the matter Stan, eh? Ben didn't mean that. I was only kidding, matey. They didn't really do that. Look, do you wanna have a go, eh? Be the cameraman? I wonder if he's ever seen a video camera before. With that lot, you're kidding. Yes, it's me. Your Auntie Helen. Film something else now, Stanley. Look at all the boats out there. Okay, that's enough now. Oh, leave him be. It's probably the most fun thing he's done in his whole life. So you can juggle and fence among other things. And you can do a BBC British accent? Yes! It's probably not as good as yours. So this is the basement where it everything happens? Yes. And you're not going to kill me at all? That's correct. Not going to lock me up and throw away the key? Nope. Okay. Sylvia, tell me. What attracts you to a role in which you will be tortured and subject to discomfort, pain, psychological terror and real fear? I love horror. I love it... Always have. On my first sleepover ever, we watched "Halloween" and almost wet ourselves. And do you think watching that kind of film makes you capable of producing real fear? Well, I think I've studied fear enough dramatically and know how to convey it. That's exactly what I am getting at. You see, I think studied and replicated fear doesn't sell. What I'm looking for is real fear... Hmm. Well, I can only show you what I have in my repertoire, I'm afraid. But I'm willing to try everything! You have a great attitude. So how do you feel about being handcuffed to this hook here? Ahh, you see, you already have the perfect expression of real fear on your face now. Do you see what I am getting at? Oh, my God, yes. This is exactly what my mother and many therapists warned me about. Don't go into the basement alone with a stranger. And most importantly, don't let that stranger tie you to the beams in the basement. Jesus Christ. If you try and kill me, I'm gonna be so upset with myself. And you. I mean, you have that wonderful English accent. I mean, you eat crumpets for breakfast and drink tea at 4:00. You couldn't hurt me if you tried. Could you? I couldn't have put it better myself. Shall we? If you'd be so kind. Why, they could have been made for you. There, you already have the perfectly frightened expression. Okay. So Silvia, now, is there anything specific you're particularly afraid of? Well... I guess being alone and helpless with some sort of maniac. Something like this but in the dark. So, let's see how you convey that on screen. How do you mean? Stanley! Stanley, where are you going? Hello? Hello, Stanley? Stanley! This isn't funny! Come back here and let me down! No! Oh, fuck! Stanley! Stanley! Fuck! Help! Hello! Help! Help, help, help! Help! Help! Sylvia? Help me. Help me! Nicole, where you at, girl? Call me! Andrew is mad at me for you not showing up for work yesterday. I can't get hold of you or Frank. And you know what day it is tomorrow! Call me, please! Excuse me? Excuse me. Sorry, I wondered if you would be kind enough to answer a few questions. Depends what the questions are? Well, the questions vary. I'm making a film and I'm trying to do some research for material. Okay, what's the film about? It's a horror film. And I wanted to ask you if you had ever been really, truly frightened and if you had been, what was it that made you feel that way? That's an interesting question. And I can tell you, yes, I have been really frightened and for a damn good reason. Really, that's fantastic. Would you like to tell me about it? Please... We can we take a seat over here? I'm Stanley by the way. Okay, I'm Nancy. So are you going to use this in the film? It depends on what it turns out to be. That's the beauty of random material. So, you're filming now, should I start? Please. Just out of curiosity, what are you are going to do with the film? Oh, I'm not sure yet. It depends on the ending. Would you like to begin? Hello, Frank and Nicole are not here right now. Please leave a message after the tone and someone will get back to you then. Nicole, I'm standing outside your door right now and nobody is answering and I'm starting to freak the fuck out. I'm going to the police if you don't call me, you understand? Hello, can I help you? I don't know. My name is Valerie and I'm looking for my friend Nicole. She lives here. Nicole, ah, hmm. What you mean "hmm"? Nicole unfortunately had a family emergency. I'm just subletting the place in the meantime. It was all rather last-minute I'm afraid. Why are you filming this? I'm a filmmaker. Nicole was kind enough to let me use the apartment for a project. Really? You know, I made a couple films myself. They're online right now. Check them out, ValerieYardGirlFilms.com I will, most definitely. So what kind of emergency was it? And she didn't even call to let me know. Frank went with her too? Frank... Yes, they... They left together. I'm... Look, I'm-I'm just in the middle of something right now. Is there a message I can give them? I'm sorry, what was your name? Stanley. Stanley Farmer. I never heard her mention your name. And I known Nicole my whole life. I don't really know her that well. Some friends of mine put me in touch with her. Huh... And this filming business. This is all fucked up, too. Anyways, I'm probably gonna go. I'm sure she'll call me and let me know what's happening when she gets time. You said her mom was sick? Family emergency of some sort. Okay, then. I best be going. Good luck with the filming. Hey, Stanley, you wouldn't mind if I just came in and used the bathroom real quick. I gotta pee real bad and it's freezing out here. Of course. Do you know where it is? Yes, thanks. I just realized you have an Australian accent? It's English actually. Huh. I like that, the way you say "actually." That's just like the motherfucking queen! Stanley. I know something is going on here. My best friend in the world suddenly disappears without saying a word and then some crazy English talking motherfucker is in her house filming me? Get that camera out of my face! Look, I don't know what you want me to say. I'm telling you the truth, all right? I want to know what is going on here, and if you don't tell me right now I'm coming back with my homeboys and they gonna fuck you up 'til I find out what is going on here. Tell me you didn't just punch me! Oh shit! Fuck! You motherfucking inject me? You think you can fuck with me? I'll kill your ass! I ain't no fucking victim! Shit! What the fuck you do to me? Shit! What'd you do to me? Oh, God! Please, let me go! Oh, God, please help me! Stanley? It's Auntie Helen. Auntie Helen. Hi, how are you? Great, now that I can finally speak to my only nephew. I just wanted to see how you're doing out there. Yeah, no, I'm... I'm fine. Everything's... Everything's going good. It's a great town. You sound exhausted. Did I catch you on the hop or something? Yeah, something like that. So, come on, tell me. How many films have you made? Are you in LA yet? No, not quite yet. Things have been pretty slow of late. But I'm actually doing something of my own right now. Oh, that's great. Your Mom says hi, by the way. Stanley? She said hi, and to send her love to you. Yeah, yeah... Okay, okay. I'm sure you're okay for friends. All of yours out here miss you. Said to send their best. That's nice to hear. I've met a lot of people out here. All of them are awesome. Because you know if you wanted to, you know, you could always come home and live with me and Ben again. You like Ben, don't you? I know you like the pub at the end of the street. I do like that pub. I'm just in the middle of something right now and you know, when it is finished, I know it's gonna make me. There hasn't been anything quite like this before. And you'll hear about it. And if it doesn't work out, then maybe I'll think about coming home. You promise? Yeah, I promise. Okay. Well, you take good care of yourself and I do miss you. I really do. I miss you, too. We both do. Bye, now. Hello, we are here for the film. Splendid. Do come in. I'm Stanley. I am Manami. This is my daughter, Kumiko. Pleased to meet you. Pleased to meet you both, too. Please come through. Can I get you anything? No thank you, Mister Stanley. So Mister Stanley, can tell us what the film is about I'm sorry. I'm laughing at your serious expressions. They are very concerned. This is a no-holds-barred horror film. Mister Stanley, is that why you advertise "no pussies"? Kumi! Correct. "No pussies" would indicate a certain amount of... balls, to be anatomically precise. And you can just call me Stanley, there is no need for the "Mister." So, Stanley, what is the film about? The film is about a man who advertises a reward for people who can spend the night in his basement. So something happens to them when they stay? Exactly. What happens to them? Something happens to them. Mister Stanley, I would like to know what happens to them. For me, it would help me understand the film more. Yes, but what I want is a spontaneous reaction, so whatever happens is played as authentic and the reaction from you will be real. I understand. So this will allow for a more improvised reaction? Exactly. I understand. Ahhh... So it is like a reality horror? Oh, very much so. Oh, I am very excited now. So how do we begin? Well, we could go down to the basement and begin now, but I'm not sure it'll work if your mother is there with us. Will she be okay to stay up here? I don't think the atmosphere will be right if she comes down. You need to feel isolated. I can go and come back an hour, Kumi. How about if I make you a cup of tea and you can stay right here? Okay, I will stay. Better put the kettle on then hadn't I? We'll have to wait for the water to boil. My name is Frank Delacourt. I'm 36 years old. I work as a finance adviser for Woolams and Gaskin. What do you want from me? Continue, please. Let's talk about your relationship. Oh, please... She's a good woman. Don't harm her. What would you say is your favorite thing to do together, say on a special Saturday night? What? Voila. And something to read. Thank you. What kind of tea is this? Oh, it's an English brew. So I should let you know, you may hear some screaming which will sound rather like Kumiko here is being murdered and sliced into small pieces, but she will in fact be just acting. Huh? Mom, it is okay if you hear me make a scream or like I am in pain, just ignore. We can do a few takes, so she gets used to hearing the sounds. I will be okay. Okay. I'll leave this camera here. I have another one set up in the basement. Shall we? Yo, man, what you filming? Just a little project of mine. Can I have six prepaid phones please? What is it, a film? Yeah, a feature film. I'm gonna be in it? If you want to be. I'll be in it if you make me rich off all those royalties. Sure. All right. Let me know when it comes out. I definitely will... Thanks. All right. I am ready. Excellent... Let's begin. Something the matter? It smells bad here. That, my dear, is all part of the physical experience. Now, I want you to close your eyes and let your mind go dark. Let the inky depths of the blackest night into your mind. And imagine that you are confined to a very small space. Keep your eyes closed but imagine you have opened them but it remains dark, and you realize that you are inside a coffin. A very small, tight, claustrophobic coffin. I want you to feel the coffin around you and choke on the putrid stench of rotting flesh as you realize... it is you who is about to experience death next. Kumi! I'm acting! It's okay! Well, that was pretty convincing if your mother's reaction is anything to go by. Okay, I have a slightly different scenario now. I'm going to blindfold you and I want to see how well you react to actually being in the dark. Oh. This will be frightening for me. What are you doing? Wandering around... Wandering... around. Wandering... Wandering... Wondering... ...how you will feel.. ...when you can't talk ever again... because your tongue has been removed? Oh, excuse me? Did you say something about my tongue? Hello? Hey, Stanley, this is Chad. I don't know if you remember me, but I auditioned for you a few days ago and you said you would be having callbacks this week maybe. Yes, Chad, I do remember you. And I am having callbacks, as a matter of fact. Are you available tomorrow night? Yes! Can you be here at 6:00? Yes! Okay, this is my bike, the four-by-four of New York City. Okay, so it's my last delivery and I'm going home. Delivery? Hey, buddy. Where you going? 15F. Let me see that. 15B. This says 15B. There is no 15F. Go ahead. On your left on the way out, okay... Left! Si, seor, si, seor. He puts the ads where? Like in a newspaper? Well, no, on the notice boards of bars, clubs, cafes, coffee-shops, maybe on the street. So, what I would like to do is for you to come up with a character like yourself who sees this advert, meaning, what kind of person do you think would be attracted to an ad like this and who would you make him? Form the character you want to play in your mind and remember that we'll be continuing the casting session with you in that character when you choose him. And can I stand? I just wanna... Go ahead. So this character, he's desperate, no? He's is in the street, because he's illegally... He's illegally in the country and he lost his job and he has no money, and his mom is sick. So he can't pay the rent so he's out on the street and he goes to the homeless shelter. And in the homeless shelter, he meet people and they give him drugs, right? And he want the drug, so he's walking one day in the street, you know, and he really want the drug and he's really cold, so he goes into a coffee shop and he see your advertising. He see your advertising and he's like, man, $1,000 for one night in a basement? Like, facil, I can do this. Is he brave? Brave like a lion. You think you are ready to begin? Yeah, I think so. Raul, do you have a big family in Honduras? Oh, you mean like in the real life or in the... in the movie? In real life. Oh, yeah. Four brother, three sister, my two grandmother and my father and mother and a lot of cousin. And what made you come here? It's America. Everybody want to come here. Aren't you a little old to be a delivery boy? Well, I do all sort of things. I am a dishwasher, I am a cleaner. You know, I need to work to make money to send back. My family depend on me. How would you feel if you knew you were never going to see your family again? No, I can't even think about that. My family mean everything to me. I send them money every week. You know, I'm going back to Honduras, like, in a year. I'll be back. But you also want to act? Yeah, man. I always wanted to act. Like, since I were 4 years old, my mom said, you gonna be on television. I love to act. Good... So let's begin. Swing your legs up on the bed. I'm going to cuff you to the bedhead for the first part of this scene, okay? Yeah... So we already... We already in the basement then? Exactly. So, Raul, you think you have the cojones to stay the night in the basement huh? Yeah. Do you believe in ghosts, Raul? No, I don't believe in ghosts. Do you believe in demons? I don't believe in demons. Do you believe in the devil, Raul? No, I don't believe in the devil. So you don't believe in the devil, Raul? Do you believe in evil, Raul? What? So, do you believe in evil? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I believe there is evil. Hey, hey, hey! What are you doing, man? Raul! Hey, hey, hey! Hey, come on, man! Stop... Mister, please, please, please. Please stop... Stop, stop, stop! Mister, please... Please stop, stop mister! Oh, thank Christ! Excuse me? I am Otto, maintenance man for this apartment building. I been trying for to get in here for three days. I'm sorry, now just really is not a good time. No, no. You are the one that called about the AC and the mold in the bathroom ceiling, yes? Hi, Stanley! Hello, Chad. Listen, I am in the middle of making a film. It really is inconvenient right now. It's fine with me if he needs to work. It's not gonna to spoil my focus. Listen, the landlord says I must do the job, okay? Today is Friday. I must get the work done today. For God's sake... All right, all right, come on in. What was your name again? Otto. So you are making film in here, yeah? Oh my God! You look ready. I am so ready. Thank you so much for this opportunity and nothing, nothing is going to throw me this time. Okay, well, look. Let me just get Otto sorted out and I'll brief you, okay? The chap downstairs already in the basement, he's a real talent. He's getting into character now. The AC is down by the window over here, yeah? Down here, right, by the window? So I can leave you to it? Yes, yes, no problem. I take care of everything. Do you need extra, no? Extra? Extra, for your film, yes? No, thank you, we already have our cast. Look, if you could just try not to make too much noise and get on with what you're doing, we're gonna be downstairs in the basement, okay? Okay, boss, you got it. Okay, so as I was saying, Raul, the actor you're working with is fantastic. He will not break character no matter what you throw at him. So just go with this, whatever happens. Okay. Just let me take a second to get ready. Is he downstairs already? Do you have something on your face? Yeah, Raul is already downstairs, and this time, we're using a little gore effect to get the realism I'm looking for. Basically, he is at the point where he desperately wants to get out of the basement. He is going to try to convince you to help him, but you are intent on winning the thousand dollars, so you're gonna do everything it takes, everything you can, to stay in the game. So I want you to stick with this, whatever happens. Do you think you can do that, Chad? Absolutely. And let me say, thank you so much again, I'm so grateful... Okay, okay, okay. So let's begin. You go down first. Who's that? Who's there? Help me, man! Help me, please! Help me... Sir! Come! Get me out of here, please! It's gonna be okay. Hijo de puta! Don't worry! Hijo de puta! Chad? You gotta help me. Help me, please. Please get me out of here! Tell me, is this a scene you can handle? I can handle anything. Fucking loco! What the fuck are you doing? Fuck! We just have to stick together and we can get out of here. What about you, Raul? Stop fucking filming me, motherfucker! Look what you did to my fucking leg! Sir, you gotta help me. Help comes in the morning. Right now you just gotta listen to me. Oww, fuck! Keep it together. What the fuck, man? Look at me, please I'm begging you, look at me, look at my leg. Get me out of here. I need to go to a hospital. I need to go to a hospital! Yeah, you need a hospital. Look at me, man! Look at my fucking leg! Fucking help me, man! What the fuck are you doing! Just keep it together. You hang in there, pal! Fuck you! Stop fucking filming me! Aww! Fuck, fuck! I'll kill you! Fucking fuck! Listen to me, you little bitch! You shut your fucking hole! I will figure out a way out of here! Dios mio, sacame de aqu. Por favor, Dios mio! Fuck, ahh! Ahh! You hang in there, pal. You hang in there. Fuck! Look what he did to my fucking leg! I sorry interrupt. I need paint for bathroom ceiling. You know where it is? Yes, it's downstairs, the eggshell white. I'll get it. You can stay here, I'll bring it to you. He is okay? Yes! So, let's continue? Fuck you. Fuck me? No, fuck you, pal. Fuck you! Listen man, you need to help me, please. This guy is fucking crazy, man. Look at my leg, he put a fucking hole in my leg. Listen to me. There's no movie, he's gonna fucking kill you. He's gonna fucking kill you. Por favor. Maybe, but I ain't going down without a fight. I need that money, man, and I'm willing to do whatever it takes, anything to get it. No money. Hello, Wadjka? Otto? Guess what! They are filming down in the basement on job I am in. What... Who? Anyone famous? No, some English guy, look like Hugh Grant. It's a low-budget, you know, like Corman. But you know, maybe they put me in the movie, huh? Don't be ridiculous. You act like a prize ham in the Brezno fair. Look, you need to fucking help me, please! What's that? Wadjka, I'll call you right back. Fuck! Don't be stupid man! Look at me! - Please! - Help comes in the morning. Right now, you just have to wait. We have to stick together! Fuck together, man! That fucker drilled a fucking hole in my... Fuck you, hijo de puta! Fuck you! And fuck you! Jesus, Otto, look, we are trying to make a film and I have a deadline. Can you please go back to work and let me finish what I started? Everybody is okay? I am sorry, very sorry. It sound like someone is dying down there. Then I'm doing a good job, aren't I? Fuck! Yes, yes. Very good job! Are we doing the scene again? Nope, we're moving on. I just need to grab some props. All this going on, I can't get nothing done. Hello, Wadjka? Otto, what was that noise? I got frightened. Oh, it was nothing. It was the actors downstairs filming. It's okay. You are an amazing actor, you know that? I mean, I wish... I hope one day I can reach your level of performance. Really, it was fierce. Like, just so incredibly fierce. Ahh! Stanley? Stanley? No, no, no no! Otto. Wait a minute, something is not right. Otto, don't go down there! Mister Stanley? Hello? Hello? Hey? Chad! Come on, Chad, come back. Chad! Chad, come back. Please, man. Come back... Chad. Chad, come here! Ahh! We're going home. Chad, Chad! Chad... Aghh! Chad, Chad... I just want to say... thank you to all those people who helped make this film possible. First and foremost my parents. And I could never, ever have done this without you. My drama teacher, Mr. Pitt, Auntie Helen and Uncle Ben, you... I really do love you both so much. You are both stars! And to all you filmmakers of horror with big breasted amateurs, you are the people who made me realize this was possible. Look at the realism I have captured! I know what real fear is, and it's been a long time coming. There were times, times I thought I would never be able to continue. But to all you budding young filmmakers out there... When darkness is rising all around, and there seems to be any choice left but to pack it in, give it up and get a proper job... "When you are going through hell... keep going." That's what I have done, my friends. That is what I have done, and only by going through hell have I produced such... a masterpiece. Thank you all. Thank you all so very much. 9-1-1 operator, what is your emergency? Hello? Hello? Hello! Police department, is anybody down here? Let's check it out. Damn, it smells bad here. Sean, we got live ones down here. Check the back! Holy shit! Holy fucking shit! Check the back! I checked the fucking back, okay, I can't see shit. Did you check the fucking back? Yeah, I checked the fucking back. Don't move, just don't move, okay? This is fucked up, John, this is real fucked up! Shut the fuck up and stop acting like a fucking rookie! You said you can't see shit, how do you know it's clear? Let's call for back up! Just everyone just shut the fuck up, okay? Just shut the fuck up and let me think, okay? Let me think, let me fucking think! What the fuck is this shit? Shit! Oh my... Oh, God! Oh my fucking God. Oh, God. Oh, my fucking God. Oh, God. Oh, my God. |
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