Folks are blessed who make|the best of every day
Living by|their own philosophy
Everyone beneath the sun|must find a way
And I have found|the only way for me
I don't believe in|frettin' and grievin'
Why mess around with strife
I never was cut out|to step and strut out
Give me the simple life
Some find it pleasant|dining on pheasant
Those things|roll off my knife
Just serve me tomatoes|and mashed potatoes
Give me the simple life
A cottage small|is all I'm after
Not one that's spacious|and wide
A house that rings|with joy and laughter
And the one you love|in sight
Some like the high road
I like the low road
Free from the care|and strife
Sounds corny and seedy|But, yes, indeedy
I like the simple life
Life could be thrilling|with one who's willing
To be a farmer's wife
Kids calling me Pappy|would sure make me happy
Give me the simple life
Some find it pleasant|dining on pheasant
Those things|roll off my knife
Just serve me tomatoes|and mashed potatoes
Give me the simple life
Nina, come on. They're gonna|be here any minute.
Okay. We'll be right down.
Father of the bride.
I never thought I'd say this, but that|whole experience Pas a piece of cake...
compared to the roller coaster|I've been on this past year.
I admit it took me a while|to recover from the wedding,
but eventually life got back|to normal, which is exactly|the way I prefer life to be.
After the dust settled, I began|to realize what a lucky guy I was.
I had a wonderful home|filled with memories,
and completely paid for;
a wife I love just as much|as the day I married her;
a daughter, independent,|self-sufficient,
married, working, happy;
a son blossoming|in the middle of middle school;
and a son-in-law|gainfully employed,
and very often,|out of town on business.
Life was sweet.
I felt for the first time|ahead of the game.
Then it dawned on me.
I was a mere five years|away from freedom.
Soon I'd be a father with one kid|married and the other off in college.
And that started me|thinking.
What was I gonna do|with all that free time?
Anything I wanted.
Maybe I'd take up|fly-fishing,
travel to exotic places,|climb Mount Everest.
I was feeling|on top of the world.
And that's when|they lowered the boom on me.
It was like that old joke:|''All those who think they have|it made, take one step forward.
Not so fast, George Banks.''
It was about a year ago|when it all started.
Well, nine months ago|to be exact.
I was on my way home from work|on a perfect fall day.
The leaves were golden.|The air was crisp.
And I couldn't help thinking|what a charmed life I was leading.
Yep, I was a happy man.
Hey, hey!
- Hey, Dad, you hear the news?|- What news?
- I don't know. She wouldn't tell me.|- Matty, phone!
- Got it!|- Who wouldn't tell you?
- Hey.|- Hi, George.
Do you think it's|what we think it is?
What? What? What is it?|Somebody tell me what's going on.
Bryan called and said|to be here at 6:00 sharp,
that he and Annie have|some important news to tell us.
This is one of those moments,|George. I can feel it.
Oh, my.
Hi, honey. Oh, don't worry,|okay? I'm sure nothing's wrong.
- How do you know?|- Well, I, I know.
- Oh, you know?|- No. I don't-- I don't really know.
I just know nothing's wrong.|Now, come on. Come on inside.
- Can I fix you a drink, George?|- No, thanks.
Nina, you don't think Annie's|been transferred back East, do you?
No, honey. Something tells me|this has nothing to do with work.
George. George. You sure|you don't want a glass of wine?
'Cause she always said|a transfer was a possibility.
And I, for one,|would hate it if they moved.
Really, George? You?
Well, they live|far enough away as it is.
Dad, they live|a mile from here.
Well, you know, with|the traffic and everything.
Oh, there they are. I just--|I just don't wanna hear|the word ''Boston,'' that's all.
I mean, you know what's|gonna happen, don't you?
First, they're gonna promise|to come home for long weekends.
Then it'll be a week every other summer.|Next thing you know, we're strangers.
We're just names on|a Christmas card list.
We'll be those relatives|out in California.
Bummer Man, he delivers.
- Hello?|- We're here.
- Hi!|- Hello!|- Hi!
- Good to see you.|- Good to see you too.
- Hey, Dad.|- Hi, son.
There she was, my Annie.
Every time I saw her, I had to remind|myself she was a married woman.
To me, she still seemed|like a kid playing house.
- Hi!|- Hi, Mom.|- Hi, hon.
- How are you?|- Good!
Are you feeling all right?
Of course she's feeling all right.|Look at her. She never looked better.
- Hi, Dad.|- Are you okay?|- I was a little late.
So, any news at work?|Any-- Any news? Any anything?
- No, everything's great.|Same, but good.|- Same.
- Busy.|- Busy.
See?
- Hey, Dad.|- Hi.
George. Sorry, George.
As long as the big news wasn't that|my daughter was moving 3,000 miles away,
her husband could call me|anything he wanted.
In spite of myself, I had|actually begun to grow somewhat|fond of Bryan MacKenzie.
Those hors d'oeuvres|look so great. I'm starving.
Mm-hmm.
So what is it, Annie?|What's the news?
- Well, don't you wanna eat first?|- Come on. Tell us. What is it?
- I know what it is.|I got it. I'm positive.|- What?
You bought a house, right? A place|you can remodel a little closer to home?
- A house? Is that it?|- Well--
Well, no, no, no, no.|A house is fine.
Oh, yeah, of course,|a-- a house is definitely good.
That's the big news? A house? Man, I|thought you guys were gonna have a baby.
- Oh, get outta here.|- Us too.
I know. Me too.|That's what I thought.
That's what|we were hoping for.
- Well--|- Tell 'em.
Your wish came true.|I'm gonna have a baby!
- We're pregnant!|- Oh!
- Congratulations.|- Oh, this is so--|- Thanks.
I never liked|that Bryan MacKenzie.
Not from the moment|I laid eyes on him.
Here my little girl was playing house,|and he had the nerve to--
- George.|- What do you say, Dad?
Congratulations.
You too.
Congratulations.
- Oh!|- Grandpa!
''Grandpa''? First that runt|steals my daughter, now he|makes a grandpa out of me.
The baby is due July 26, and I like that|'cause that's a good even number.
Of course, it is|going to be very hot.
But I'm sure she's not|gonna mind. Oh, God. Oh, George.
Can you believe the same doctor|who delivered Annie is going|to be delivering her baby?
- Oh, honey. It's so amazing.|- Yeah.
Oh, George!|I have a great idea.
What if Franck did|the baby shower for us?
- Franck?|- As a favor, honey. George.
What? I thought|you liked Franck now.
- I never actually said|I liked the man.|- Yes, you did. Yes, you did.
When we were at that party|with those people from whatcha-callit,
- you were just raving on about him.|- All right. Well, maybe it slipped out,
but I didn't mean it.
Nina, get a grip.|I'm not gonna go into hock...
to give Annie a baby shower.
I just finished|paying for the wedding.
Oh, now my stomach hurts.|Where'd you put my Tums?
All right, honey. Okay. Okay, okay.|It was just a thought. Calm down.
What's the matter with you anyway?|You didn't say a word during dinner.
- You're acting as if|you're not happy about this.|- Who's acting?
Oh, I see. You're not happy that your|daughter is going to be having a baby?
That's right, Grandma.|I'm not.
- Why?|- Well, for starters,|they can't afford a baby.
- Oh! Oh.|- Babies cost money.
And the older they get,|the more they cost.
I mean, they didn't plan for this.|They don't have a nest egg.
They-- They|barely have a nest.
How are they gonna fit a baby|into that shoe box they live in?
Really, George. They have more money|than we had at their age.
Also, what do they know|about raising a kid?
Annie's just a kid herself. I|mean, she graduates college and|marries the first guy she meets.
And now to get saddled with a baby|even before her career takes off.
Why must I always be the only|feminist in this family?
You know, I just|realized something.
I'm four-foot-six.|I don't shave.
I don't have a job,|and I'm gonna be an uncle.
Is there somethin'|weird about that?
Finally, someone|who thinks like I do.
Oh, yeah,|a 12 year old.
Hello? Oh. Sally!
Oh, Sally, hi. I have|the best news. Guess what.
This is so exciting.
I'm gonna be a grandmother.
- Poor Nina. The woman was|obviously living in denial.|- Yeah. I know.
- I, for one, wasn't ready|to be a grandfather.|- I know. Yeah.
What was so grand|about it anyway?
George? Oh, he's thrilled.
- Grandfathers wore|cardigans and hearing aids.|- In fact, um, I was just|telling him that...
-I wore baseball caps and running shoes.|-the same doctor who delivered Annie--
Sure I may have been a little|out of shape, but I was still young.
And I could prove it.
Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!
Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!
Oh, yeah! Come on. Come on.|Come on. Come on. Come on.
- Whoa.|- Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
You better|take it easy there, Pops.
Oh! Ow!
Oh, hang on a second.
- You got the list?|- I got it right here. Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine. Shoot.|- Okay.
- The following men are older than you:|- Go.
- Paul McCartney;|- Yeah.|- Rod Stewart;|- Yeah.
- Jack Nicholson.|- Jack Nicholson?
Oh, by eight years.|You're much younger than Jack Nicholson.
Well, you can't get any cooler than Jack|Nicholson. That's a good one. Go on.
- Okay. Mick Jagger;|- Yeah.|- Robert Redford.|- Really?
-Mm-hmm. Bob Dylan; Warren|Beatty; and Bill Clinton.|-Really?
- But only by 31 days.|- Hey, younger is younger.
- Oh, when the saints|- Hi. Here's what I'm thinkin'.
- Go marchin' in|- I wanna look younger.
- You know, I think maybe|something, you know, in here.|- Oh, when the
- Saints go marchin' in|- Like the hair, it's really too square.
- I'm just kind of-- you know.|- I want to be
- A little stickied up,|you know. Kinda hip!|- In their number
- Easy.|- When the saints go marchin' in
Oh, when the sun|refuse to shine
Oh, when the sun|refuse to shine
I still wants to be|in their number
- When the sun refuse to shine|- Young, right?|- Oh, totally.
- It's bitchin'.|- Oh, when the saints
- Go marchin' in|- Bitchin'.
Oh, when the saints|go marchin' in
I'm going to sing|as loud as thunder
Oh, when the saints|go marchin' in
Hi.
Hi.
Well, hi.
At last
My love has come along
My lonely days
Are over
And life is like a song
Oh, yeah, yeah
At last
- The skies above are blue|- Oh! George. George!
- George, what are you doing?|- What are you doing?
- Oh! Oh, George.|- Hey, what do you think?|Can you tell the difference?
Can I tell the difference? What|did you do? ls it-- Is it permanent?
It is if you want it to be. The new,|permanent, young and improved...
- and stronger, I might add,|George Stanley Banks.|- I
- I love you|- I look like the guy|you married, right?
- Kind of.|- Hey, don't kid yourself.
It makes you look|younger too, you know?
- Hey, where's Matty?|- Matty's eating at Cameron's.
Huh. All alone. Hmm.
Just you and me|at the old house.
- May I ask you what|possessed you to do this?|- To call my own
- I found a thrill|- Just wanna look the way|I feel, that's all.
- Oh. What?|- Ava loved it.
- Who's Ava?|- Oh, just the girl|who did it, that's all.
She said it took years|off my face.
You know, Nina,|you're very beautiful.
- Oh. George.|- You are so very beautiful.
- Really?|- Yeah.
Thank you, honey. Oh!
- My. What's in the bag?|- Oh!
I got you something totally great.|I found it at Victoria's Secret.
- Oh, God, George.|- I opened a charge|for you there, by the way.
Huh? What-- What are you--|Are you crazy, honey?
-I'm not-- I'm not wearing that.|I am a grandmother, okay? I--|-You're-- You're--
- You're not my grandmother, are you?|- No.
- For you are mine|- Well, George, what's|gotten into you, honey?
Hey, can't a man make love|to his wife without something|having gotten into him?
Well, what do you mean,|make love?
What do you think I mean?|Hmm?
My, my, my. This is|a new and improved George Banks.
Hey, hey, hey. Didn't we just pay|900 bucks to have this roof fixed?
I swear to God, this house|is starting to fall apart.
First, the heating went, then the gas|thing broke and the plumbing froze.
I don't know, sometimes I, I|think I would just like to wash|my hands of this whole thing.
George, what is it?|What-- What are you thinking?
- I have a brilliant,|beyond-brilliant idea.|- Uh, yeah?
- I say we sell this dump.|- Right.
- I'm serious.|- George, what? Are you crazy?
Honey, last year you said|you wanted to be buried in the backyard.
Now you're telling me|you wanna sell the place?
Nina, listen. Matty's|in school every day 'til 6:00.
You're at work. I'm at work.|You know, let's get rid of it.
Let's not be so by-the-book,|you know. Let's-- Let's be|adventurous. Let's loosen up.
I don't know. I mean,|if we sold the place, then|we won't have room for the baby.
What ''we,'' kemo sabe?|It's not our baby. lt doesn't|need its own room in our house.
- Well, what about Matty?|- Oh, like Matty wouldn't|love living at the beach?
The-- Oh! The beach?|Mr. Sunscreen?
Please, George. I mean,|now you wanna live at the beach?
Hey, you're the one who always|said that one day before you're|old you wanna live by the ocean.
- I know, but--|- I'm telling you,|this, this leak is an omen.
You know, we could sell|this place in a second.
I mean, it's the Leave It To Beaver|house that everybody wants.
You know, we'd have enough money to buy|a condo. You know, we could get a boat.
We could travel. And I could get|that Harley I always wanted.
Harley? Honey. Oh, George. This|has been a very big day for you.
First your hair,|and then this, uh, thing.
I just-- I think we should|think about things, okay?
Okay. But will you|think about it, really?
- Well, will you wash that stuff|out of your hair, really?|- Yeah.
Okay, I'll make ya a deal.
- Okay?|- Mm-hmm.
If one more thing goes wrong with|this house, we'll put it up for sale.
You have my word on it.
As luck would have it, termites|attacked two weeks later.
So we decided to give it a test run,|see if we got any nibbles.
Four weeks went by|and not a single nibble.
All right, here we go.|Here we go. Here.
- Check.|- Ball in. Come on. Let's go.
What are you doing? What are|you doing? Hey! Where you going?
- Spin move.|- Whoa! Hey! What? Hey!
- Come on. No. No!|- Yes!
Then one Saturday morning,|we got a bite. A big bite.
George, I'd like you|to meet Mr. and Mrs. Habib.
Hello. How do you do? Nice to|meet you. This is my son Matty|and his friend Justin.
- We like house very much.|When you can move out?|- Excuse me?
The Habibs would like to buy|the house, George. It's exactly|what they've been looking for.
Yes, when you can move? We need|house a week from Wednesday.
And my wife wants|flower dishes in kitchen.
- You sell, we pay top dollar.|- For the house, top dollar?
Dishes. For the dishes. For the house,|we pay what you ask and no more.
But we need house a week|from Wednesday or no deal.
Gee, that's, uh-- That's ten days|from now. That's kinda quick.
We've lived here 18 years.|I don't know if we can get every--
Excuse, please?
Uh, you explain that I pay big money|if he sell now. Very big bonus.
Mr. Habib is willing|to pay a generous bonus...
for whatever inconvenience moving|too quickly may cause you, George.
Dad, you better|discuss this with Mom.
- How generous?|- Would, uh,
$15,000 be generous enough?
- We may be making real estate|history here, George.|- Oh, yeah.
One, two,
three thousand,
four, five, six,
seven thousand--
I shook the man's hand and|promised to be out in ten days.
Careful with the dishes.
Only problem was, I didn't|have the nerve to tell Nina.
Wonderful champagne, George.|Dom Perignon. What are we celebrating?
I know. That's what I was wondering.|What are we celebrating, dear?
Well, it's just the first time|the whole family's been together|since the baby and everything.
- Oh.|- Oh.|- Oh, honey.|- Thanks, Dad. That's sweet.
Oh.
So tell us, have you thought of|any names for the baby yet?
Well, if it's a boy, we like|Cody, Cooper, Riley or Wyatt.
- Wyatt? As in Earp?|- Yeah.
- Y-You don't like it, Dad?|- Well, I like it better than Cooper.
- Or Riley.|- Hey, what if it's a girl?
For a girl,|our favorite name is Chloe.
- Chloe? Ooh.|- Chloe? It's not even American.
Th-Thank you, Matthew. We realize that.|We-- We also like Phoebe and Sophie.
And we're still debating|between Lucy and Fanny.
Y-You're not considering|any family names?
Yes, isn't the first son supposed to be|named after the paternal grandfather?
Well, he doesn't have to be named John,|of course. Any name on my side will do.
We have an Andrew in the family.|A Melville. A Jacob.
Uh, Jake is a great name.
Hey, you know what. They don't need any|more suggestions. Their list is fine.
You're absolutely right, George.|Anything is fine as long|as it goes with MacKenzie.
Uh, wait a minute. I thought the|baby's last name was gonna be|Banks-MacKenzie with a hyphen.
- Wasn't that the deal?|- Would you like to go through life...
with the name|Cooper Banks-MacKenzie?
Kid's gonna sound|like a law firm.
It's an awfully long|last name, George.
Hold on. What are we saying?|You're not gonna hyphenate the|last name? When did this happen?
Nothing's been decided yet, Dad.|It's just that...
we think two last names is a lot|for a little kid to deal with.
And since neither of us|want to forfeit our names,
we've been coming up|with alternative last names.
Your baby's gonna have an alternative|last name? Like, what, Smith or Jones?
- No.|- No, because you can't|make Smith or Jones from|the letters of our last names.
- Right.|- So--|- I don't understand.|What names can you make?
Well, the ones we like best|are Zineman, Zenkman and Mannis.
Oh, my.
Are you telling me I might have|a granddaughter named Sophie Zenkman?
- Yeah.|- Look, look. I have|a simple solution here.
George, Nina. You already have|Matty to carry on the family name.
So, why don't we drop this|Banks-MacKenzie business and...
just go with MacKenzie?
- Or drop the MacKenzie.|- Oh, well, now wouldn't that be silly?
Well, I don't think that's any|sillier than dropping the Banks.
- Well, I would venture|to suggest that MacKenzie...|- Well, I do.
- is a good, solid family name.|- I mean, traditionally, you take--
I mean, the baby's just as much|a Banks as it is a MacKenzie, isn't it?
- Traditionally--|- Dad, say something.
- I just don't agree with that.|- Change the subject.
- MacKenzie is--|- Hey, guess what.|I sold the house today.
- What did you say, dear?|- Nina, I forgot to tell you.
While you were at the market|this morning, I sold the house.
Well, congratulations, Gramps.|Where are you movin'?
Well, we don't know exactly for|sure where yet, but, uh, we're|thinking of maybe the beach.
- We don't know exactly|for sure where yet?|- What?
But, George, we haven't|even started looking.
You sold the house? Dad.
- Why is she crying?|- Well, because I never thought...
they were serious|about selling the house.
I'm sorry, Dad, but I just thought it|was another goofy idea like your hair.
- Hey.|- I never thought you were|actually gonna go through with it.
- I love this house.|- Well, wow!
I guess I just assumed|we'd have a little more warning.
But what do we have?|We have at least 90 days before|we have to move. Am I right, George?
Oh, believe me, Nina, you can jack up|an escrow six months, if you need to.
- Matty, what's going on?|- May I be excused?
No. No, sir.|You may not be excused.
- George!|- The guy paid me $15,000 extra|to be out in ten days.
The guy paid you $15,000 extra|to be out of the house in ten days?
- I hope you took it, George.|- He did.
- And he threw in Mom's favorite|dishes just to close the deal.|- George!
Nina was less than thrilled|about our abbreviated escrow.
But being the great woman|that she is, she went with the flow...
and even allowed me back into|our bedroom for our last night|at 24 Maple Drive.
And since we had nowhere to|live, she also arranged for us|to stay at the MacKenzie's...
- while they took a Caribbean cruise.|- Honey.
Honey, are you sure you don't|want me to take your picture by|your favorite part of the fence?
No, no, I'm fine.
Oh, okay-- Oh. Whoa.
Hey, Nina, are you okay?|I mean, you don't look so good.
I know. I don't|really feel so good.
I-I just didn't think I'd get|so emotional about this whole thing.
I don't know.|I feel kind of dizzy.
You guys, these are from the tree|that we carved our initials...
- in out back.|- Oh!
- Here. Here.|- Oh!
Oh, Mom, did you get|a picture of the tree?
- Oh, just a roll, honey.|- Okay.
- Oh.|- Hey, Matty, what's that?|- My doorknob.
I want to keep a memento|from my room.
- Oh!|- Oh!
Hey, what are we,|the Schmaltz family?
Come on. No more tears.|We're on to bigger and better things.
I mean, who needs|this old shack? Look at it.
Dad, there's one more thing|we have to do before we go.
I'm not gonna dig up|that parakeet from the backyard.
That's not|what I was thinking.
How many times do you think|we've played out here?
About a thousand.
- I remember our very first game.|- Me too.
- I remember you were four.|- Here you go. Here you go.
You had a red ribbon|tied in your hair.
Dad!
Look, Dad,|I can dribble. Watch.
That's my girl.|That's my girl.
Hey.
Sorry to interrupt.
Oh, uh, hi.
- You got the key, George?|- Yeah, I-- Uh, I have it right here.
Uh. I got it.|I know I have it.
Oh, uh, Mr. Habib,|this is my daughter Annie.
Uh, she had her wedding here|at this house.
Ah, yes. The key?
Oh, yeah. I got it.|Somewhere.
Did I give that to you?|Ah, okay. Oh, sorry.
So, well, here you are.|And, uh, here you go.
- She's all yours.|- Good luck, Banks.
Uh, you too.
Well.
- Ah, what perfect timing. We were|just about to depart ourselves.|- Hi, Nina.
- Are you-- Are you in a hurry?|- Oh, not at all. No.|We have plenty of time.
- Oh, thanks so much.|- Welcome. Come on in.
- Oh, it's our pleasure.|- Welcome. Welcome.|Make yourselves at home.
- Come in, please.|- Are you sure?|- Where's Matty?
- Oh, he's sleeping at a friend's.|- I'll tell you what. The dog food's...
- all in the refrigerator and marked.|- That's nice.
- Uh, uh, you remember|the dogs, of course?|- Yeah. Yeah.
- Fortunately, they forgot you.|- Oh.
Come here, you angels.
I'm gonna miss you guys.
- See, George? They're|completely harmless.|- Mm-hmm.
Get ahold of yourself. Now, listen,|I want you to pay attention...
to your Uncle George and|your Aunt Nina now, all right?
Bye, fellows.
Oh, all right.|One more kiss, you maniac.
- John!|- Wow.|- All right.
- We're off.|- Well, good-bye.|- Oh! Oh.
- Oh, well.|- That's what the limo was for.
- Help yourself to anything|you see. We'll call you.|- Got the tickets, honey?
- They're all yours.|- Thanks.|- Okay, bye-bye.
- Enjoy.|- Thanks so much.|- I've got everything, sweetheart.
And when you get through with|that limo, send it back for us.
Oh. Oh, George.
Honey, do something.|They look sad.
Hey, guys.|Don't worry about a thing.
- Uncle George is here--|- Oh, George.
All right. Now, just take it easy, guys.|He's not gonna hurt you.
- Cute. Cute.|- Well, as it turned out,|the dogs did remember me.
Hey, puppy, puppy, puppy.
It was going to be a long night.|Just the four of us|in the old MacKenzie mansion.
Hey, listen to this. Luxury|beach condo. Marina views.
Stroll along winding streams|past lush landscaped gardens.
Honey, are you sure you didn't|pack the Pepto-Bismol?
Why? You still feel sick?
I can't seem to shake this thing.|I just don't feel right.
You just need a good night's sleep.|That's all. Tomorrow--
- Oh.|- Tell 'em to get off.
Okay, come on, guys.|Get off. Let's go. Off.
Come on. Off.|Come-- Oh, forget it.
I gotta-- I gotta lay down.|Just come on. Let's move over.
That's a good dog. Oh!
What am I supposed to do?|Sleep standing up?
I don't know, honey.|Just push 'em off.
All right, boys. Hey, come on, come on.|Now, now, fun's over. Let's go.
Come on. Get off the bed.|Off the bed. Now, come on.
Come on. I-I don't|wanna have to get tough.
So just come on. Let's go!|I mean it. Amscray!
Off the bed! Come on! Off!
- Oh.|- Get your filthy paw|off my wife, you good--
Oh, forget about it. It's their house.|Let 'em have the bed.
I'll-- I'll go stay in one|of the other seven bedrooms.
Oh, but, honey, I don't|wanna be left alone in this|big room. I don't feel good.
Fine. I-I'll sleep|on the floor. Huh?
Thanks.
Oh, I know. I have an idea.|What if after they fall asleep,|you just lift them off?
Oh, yeah, of course. I'll just|lift 'em off. What are you, nuts?
- Could you hand me a pillow?|- Yep.
Oh, I'm so naive.
Oh, I know|what's wrong with me.
What? What's|wrong with you?
It's so obvious. I don't know|why I didn't realize it before.
Honey, I'm going|through menopause.
Oh, Nina. You can't be going|through menopause. My mother|went through menopause.
Well, exactly,|and probably at my age.
George, I have|all the symptoms.
I'm late. I'm weepy all|the time. I'm hot and dizzy.
- Don't be silly. We're still so--|- But, George, honey, we're not.
We're not as young|as you think we are.
Just because we're getting|older, it doesn't mean that|we're old. This is the '90s.
Growing old isn't what|it used to be. Well, it's true.
Women my age are doing Geritol ads|and Fixodent commercials.
- Nina.|- They are.
And guess who I saw on|the cover of Longevity magazine.
- Guess.|- Barbara Bush.
Peggy Lipton.
From The Mod Squad?
This is reality, George.|Do me a favor, will ya, honey?
Stop acting like|this isn't happening.
- Oh, do I have to?|- Yes! Yes.
George. George. You haven't been|the same since the day you|found out Annie was pregnant.
Now, I know you, and I know it takes you|a long time to work these things out.
- But I miss the old George.|- Must you use that word?
All right. I miss the adorable|George Banks I used to be married to.
Honey, you got me worried. I don't know.|You dyed your hair. You sold our house.
- What's next, a 19-year-old girlfriend?|- Nina!
Well, men do those kinds|of things, George.
They don't wanna grow old with their|wives, so they get-- I don't know.
New wives. Young wives.|Just--
- Nina.|- What, honey?
- What?|- I may dye my hair, and I may|wanna move to the beach and...
- Yeah?|- I may hate the idea that|I'm gonna be a grandfather,
but never for one millisecond|of one day...
did I ever not wanna spend|the rest of my life with you.
- Really?|- Really.|- Really?
And I'm sorry|I've been such a jerk.
- Oh, that's okay. I'm used to it.|- Yeah.
- Good night.|- Good night.
The doctor didn't give you|any indication of why|he wanted me to come with you?
-No.|-But he didn't say there was|anything to be concerned about?
No. I mean, I assume this is|absolutely routine. I don't know, honey.
I've never been through|menopause before, you know.
He probably just wants to tell us|what to expect un-- well, unless--
- Unless what? What? Unless what? What?|- Well, unless...
something showed up on my|blood test that was too horrible|to tell me over the phone,
and he wanted you here for|support in case I flipped out.
- You know, and he just, like--|- Nina, well, what did|the man say exact--
- Well--|- What were his words?|- Just that...
he thought it would be wise for us|to come in together as soon as possible.
That's all.|Okay, here we are, honey.
I'm sure I'm gonna be fine.|I hope.
I'd never seen Nina|so unglued.
I wasn't used to being|the calm one.
I didn't know what the doctor|was about to tell us.
But nothing, absolutely nothing,|could've prepared me for what|I was about to hear.
- It's gonna be all right.|- I know.
Nina, George.
- Well, we ran a panel on Nina's blood.|- Nina.
- What?|- Whatever it is, I just want|you to know I'm here for you.
- And you can count on me.|- Okay.
We're gonna get|through this together.
- Okay?|- Okay.
So, uh, tell us. Uh, what is it?|We can handle it.
- What's wrong with her?|- Nothing.
Nothing that won't go away|in nine months.
Kids, you're gonna|have a baby.
- Excuse me?|- Nina's pregnant.
- Oh, my God.|- Pregnant?
- And who, may I ask, is the father?|- George!
Don't ''George'' me,|you two-timing Mata Hari.
I swear, we haven't|done it in six weeks.
I haven't just felt myself|lately, but pregnant?
How could this happen,|Nina Dickerson?
Why are you calling me|by my maiden name, you big jerk?
And, what do you mean we haven't|done it in six weeks? What about|that little escapade in the kitchen?
Oh, please. That was|a stupid nothing. I mean, that|was a moment of pure insanity.
Would you like to know|how many moments of pure insanity...
I've delivered|over the last 20 years?
Phil, look at me.|I'm about to be a grandfather.
Things like this|do not happen to men my age.
Come on! Picasso had children|well into his seventies.
Ah, well, you know, Picasso.|I mean, Picasso.
I mean, there-- He's the one guy in|history who had kids into his seventies.
But, you know, he's an artist.|He can do anything he wants.
I'm just-- You know,|I'm just a, a regular Joe.
You know, regular Joes don't|have, have babies at my age!
You know, I was-- I was just|adjusting to being a grandfather!
Preg--
Oh! Oh, my God!
- All right. Here you go, Mr. Banks.|- Oh, I'm all right.|- George?
- Now, wait a minute.|- Here. Let me help. I'll help.|- I'm okay.
- You okay?|- I'm okay.|- Let's see if you got|your sea legs back yet.
- Sorry about that. I'm just, uh--|- The shock.
- I know.|- Anyway, thank you.
- Uh-huh. Bye-bye.|- Thank you.|- I know, honey. Me too.
I just-- God. I can't|believe it, huh? Yikes!
Well, you don't think he could be like,|you know, wrong or something, do you?
I don't think he used a|home pregnancy test, George. No.
Honey, this is definitely like|I'm-- This is happening, George.
I know it's a lot to deal with,|but we'll just-- we'll just|let it sink in, all right?
- Good idea.|- Okay. Mom's the word, huh?
Did she say,|''Mom's the word''?
Oh, man. This was a life curve|I was not ready for.
''Grandmother Has Baby.'' It was like|a National Enquirer headline.
One would have thought nothing on earth|could have topped this moment.
- Wrong again.|- It's the musk oil smell|that scares me.
- Oh, well.|- Oh!
- Oh, my God, the Banks!|- Oh, my gosh.
And my favorite|father of the bride.
- Hi. How are you?|- Hello!
- Great. Wonderful. You|look wonderful. Mr. Banks.|- Oh. Look at you!
- Chop, chop, chop.|Oh, you look beautiful.|- How are you, sir?
Imagine running into you here of all|places. This is our home away from home.
Well, I am always fixing, you know.|A nip, a tuck, a little suction.
You know, I look in the mirror|and I say, ''Hello. Looking sad.''
So I come down here, I valet|park, and bongo, Cher Bono.
So how 'bout you? Nothing is wrong,|I hopes? Your health is good?
- Oh, yeah, yeah. We're--|We're good. We're perfect.|- Oh, yeah, it's good. It's great.
- We're healthy and,|uh, nothing to report.|- Very healthy.
- Nothing at all.|- Great.|- Oh, well.
- Oh.|- Mrs. Banks.
- Huh?|- You forgot your prenatal vitamins...
and all your pamphlets|on becoming a mommy again...
- and the ultrasound photo.|- Oh.
Your baby's first picture.
- Oh, no.|- Baby's first picture? Don't--
- Don't tell me you are pregnant?|- No?|- Yeah. I am.
- Oh, my God!|- I know. I just found out.
Oh, I love that so much! Mother of|the bride and a mommy! Get out of town!
- Oh, mazeltov, Mrs. Banks!|- And guess what.
- What?|- Annie's pregnant too.
- Oh, no!|- I didn't hear that!
Mother and daughter are|pregnant together? Oh!
That is fabulous!|I love that ! That's chic.
- I think I'm gonna faint.|- He did.
This is what I suggest. You must|let me do the baby shower.
- Howard, hands me the book.|Quick. Quick, boy.|- Oh!
No, no, Franck. Not this time.|No more parties. No way. N-O.
You never wants to have fun,|George. And you never change.
Every party has a pooper|That's why we invited you
- Party pooper|- Party pooper
Every party has a pooper|That's why we invited you George Banks
- That's you|- It was on the second chorus...
of ''Every party has a pooper''|that I got woozy again.
Next thing I knew, we|were driving through town.
Nina was glowing.
She looked so peaceful.
Grab your coat|and get your hat
Leave your worries|on the doorstep
- You can't get me!|- Just direct your feet|- Slow down, son!|Whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait, son!
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!|- To the sunny side of the street
Can you hear|the pitter-pat
- Yeah, that happy tune he's whistlin'|- George?
- Nina?|- Honey, I need to know how|you feel about all this.|- Life can be so sweet
- Dad, I want a hot dog!|- On the sunny side of the street
- They don't have any hot dogs!|They don't have hot dogs!|- I don't like--
Don't! Josh! No! No! No!
I feel super about it.|I'm totally up for it.
- You are?|- Definitely.
Oh!
So what do you think? You think we have|the stamina to have a baby?
What do you mean, honey?|For the actual pregnancy?
- Well, I know I have|the stamina for that part.|- Oh, well. That's a relief.
I'm talking about the rest of it,|like the next 18 years part.
But, George, for weeks you've been|telling me how young you are.
- And you've been telling me|how old we are.|- Well, we're obviously|not too old, honey.
Well, Nina, let's be honest. I|mean, just because a man wears sneakers,|it doesn't make him a teenager.
I was completely kidding myself.|When I was working out at the gym, there|were 60 year olds more buff than me.
Oh, so we're too old for this. ls that|what you're trying to tell me, George?
No, it's just that I was beginning|to feel like we were approaching...
that big parenting|finishing line.
Now to be all the way back|at the starting gate?
Not to mention, we will be|like the oldest parents ever|at the starting gate.
I mean, let's face it. Between us,|we're almost a hundred years old.
But don't get me wrong.|I'm into it.
3:00 a.m. feedings and diapers and car|seats and Mister Rogers and vomiting.
- Hi.|- Hi.
Hi, sweetie. Hi.
- Hi.|- Hi.|- Hi, guys.
- Hi.|- Hi.|- Everything go okay?
Oh. Oh.
So what's going on?|What'd the doctor say?
Is that, uh, TV still on the blink?|Because I have time now, I--
- Dad.|- Okay.
- Well, he, uh--|- Mom, you can tell me. I'm a big girl.
Well, honey, as it turns out,|my, my blood tests are fine.
- Good.|- Yeah. And I'm not even|going through menopause.
- I thought you were too young for that.|- Yeah, well, I don't know.
So what is it?|Did he find anything?
Well, actually, he did, didn't he?|He did find a little something.
He did? What?
Believe it or not,|your father and I--
- We're going to have a baby.|- We're pregnant!
You guys!|That is so unfunny.
I mean, can you imagine|if that were true?
I mean, you couldn't be.
You're serious?|You're really pregnant?
I'm due September 4,|Labor Day.
Perfect timing, huh? Labor Day.|You know, we should go now.
- Mom, you're pregnant?|- Well, honey.
It's not something we planned. Sometimes|these things, they just happen.
Who knew? You know,|it was a rainy afternoon.
And, uh, your mom and I were|all alone in the house.
Then, uh, one thing leads to another.|And then the next thing you know, hey.
- Daddy!|- At that moment, I wanted to|crawl under the sofa and die.
You old son of a gun.
''Son of a gun''?|I wish I had a gun.
If it wasn't for this kid|coming into our lives, none of|this would ever have happened.
- It's okay.|- Gee, I don't know what to say.
- That's okay.|- I just never thought we'd both|be pregnant at the same time.
- Yeah, well.|- I'm not crying because I'm|sad, really, because I'm not.
- No. What's-- Well--|- I gotta get a Kleenex.
Annie? Oh.|Annie, don't-- Don't cry, honey.
She's been kind of|emotional lately.
So, our kids will be what?|Not brother and sister. That's wrong.
Oh, no, no, no, no.|Their kid will be your brother|or sister and our kid's cousin?
No, your kid's|uncle or aunt.
Yeah, but our kid will probably|be more comfortable calling us|Grandma and Grandpa...
just like your kid, you know, at|least in front of his friends.
You know, 'cause let's face it.|We're gonna be in our fifties|when he's in preschool.
In our sixties,|when he graduates college.
But, you know, that'll be great|to see another kid in cap and gown,
you know, if we can|still see by then.
Now, at least going to the movies,|that'll be economical.
''One child, two seniors.|Thanks.''
Kid's gonna love spending|his adolescence in a retirement home.
At least he won't have to worry|about us hearing him come in late.
That's right, honey, because|we won't be able to hear, right?
Exactly.
You're so hilarious, George. You're so|hilarious. You're so sensitive.
And I really appreciate you|asking me how I feel about|all this, especially since...
I'm the one who's going|to be having the baby.
You're right.
How do you feel about it?
I know how old I am, George. I've|already been the mother of the bride.
But here I am at the age I am,|and I'm pregnant.
And, you know, I don't|think that qualifies me for|the Guinness Book Of Records, George.
So in answer to your question,|I'm very happy!
I'm happy and|I'm feeling nervous...
and I'm just|very much alone.
Well, anyway,|good-bye, sweetie.
I've gotta go. Yeah.|And thank you so much, Bryan.
Thank you. Thank you.
Do me a favor.|Don't follow me, Banks! No!
I went after her,|but it didn't do much good.
I called her, but she refused|to pick up the phone.
Calling me ''Banks''|was never a good sign.
Fortunately, my daughter was kind enough|to put her old man up for the night.
But I couldn't sleep.
I was worried I wouldn't|have what it takes,
that I wouldn't be the same|for the next one.
- Okay? I miss you.|- Yes.|- Okay.
Okay, gimme a kiss.|Gimme a kiss. I love you.
Bye, Daddy. I love you.
Go up and see Mommy.
I love you, Daddy.
Sorry, Maple Drive's closed.|You'll have to use the detour.
- My house!|- Bye-bye, house.
Bring it back!
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!|Stop!
Stop! Stop that ball!|Stop it! Stop that!
Hey, stop! Stop. Stop!
- Stop! Stop, stop!|- Stop!
- Stop! Stop! Stop.|- Hold, please!
- Hang on, guys!|- You have a problem, George?
Mr. Habib, you didn't tell me|you were gonna tear down the house.
- You didn't ask.|- I didn't ask because it just|never entered my mind.
But since you obviously don't want|the house, I have the perfect solution.
Sell the house back to me! I still have|your check here in my wallet.
- I never even cashed it.|- I don't think so, George.
See, I demolish house, build two in|its place. This a great piece of land.
Mr. Habib, this is not|''a piece of land.''
This is my home,|and I'm gonna be a father again...
and I don't want to bring|my baby home from the hospital|to a condo on the beach.
I wanna drive|down that street,
and I wanna pull|into this driveway,
and I wanna honk my horn--
Yes, yes, okay. I know.
Mr. Habib, please.
You see this pathway?
I laid these bricks|with my own two hands.
I planted this grass.
I-- I built this fence.
I broke that window|with a frisbee!
I painted these shutters.
Don't bulldoze|my memories, man.
I'm begging you.|Sell me back my home.
Boy. For how much?
You wanna make a profit|on something you owned for one day?
Yes!
Fine.
Will $5,000|do the trick?
George, just another day ago,
I turned down profit|of 50,000 on lot.
Now, you want to double that,|I consider selling back.
You want me to take out|a loan on something I owned free|and clear just 24 hours ago?
Well, that is up to you, George.
Your path, your fence,|your memories.
You don't know what you're asking, sir.|I am the cheapest man alive.
Then move aside, George,|'cause I going to level the place.
We go to work!|Come, come! Go, go!
- Commence to start!|- Commence to start!
- All right!|- Stop! Stop!|- Stop!
You win.|One hundred thousand dollars.
Very close shave, George. Yes, make out,|please, to the Habib Group.
- Habib Group.|- Inc.
- Inc.|- Very good.
- Welcome home, George.|- It feels good to be back.
Well, I happy I could help.
Mr. Habib,|just one last question.
Would you mind getting|your wrecking ball off my lawn?
Oh, sure. Anything you say, George.|You're the boss.
- We go. Move out!|- That's right! I'm the boss!
So all you guys,|get a move on!
- Get that dump truck out of here!|- Right away!
- And quit standing on my shutters!|- Sorry.
And all of you guys, just pack up|your stuff and hit the road!
And don't trample the pansies.
I laid those bricks,|I planted those pansies,
I painted those shutters,|I broke that window!
I'm home.
I'm home!
First thing I did|was apologize to Nina.
That is not funny, George.|I'm not gonna listen to you.
Then I told her I bought|the new baby a present.
- That did it. Twenty-four hours|later, we moved back home.|- George!
Before we knew it,|it was spring.
- Here you go.|- Everything was in full bloom,
including the women|in my life.
Hello? Oh, hi, honey.
- Baby's been kicking a lot.|- Annie and Nina were|in their second trimesters.
- There was no denying it now.|- Yeah, I know we can't sing.
The stork was not only on his way,|he was circling the neighborhood.
Still trying|to redeem myself,
I did the unthinkable.
I hired Franck to surprise the girls|with a double baby shower.
- It's a baby shower! Oh!|- Hello, ladies.
What dreams are made of!|Look what I have for you!
- It was picture perfect,|- Oh, my!
topped off by two surprise|guests flown in for the occasion|all the way from Vienna.
- It's a stork!|- Oh, my God.
- After the shower,|- Thank you.
Nina was showing a few of her friends|the new baby's room...
and Franck started giving|decorating tips.
But this is what I suggest.
Firstly, if it were me,|you know,
what I would do is I'd|push those windows out and let|sweet San Marino light fill in.
Therefore, the third trimester|in the Banks family began...
with a remodel of what we|now affectionately called|''the baby's suite.''
I'll admit we got a little carried away,|and it wasn't even all Franck's fault,
although God knows|I tried to blame him.
- Hey! Hey!|- No, no, no, no!
Nina and Annie were doing great,|right on schedule...
and weighing in at 128|and 132 pounds respectively.
Ohh! Oh.
We had everything you'd expect|when you're expecting:
leg cramps, backaches|and cravings.
And the women were worse.
What we didn't expect|one sleepy night...
was an unexpected visitor.
- Oh, hi, Dad.|- You okay?
I'm fine.
Bryan and I got in a fight.
And I got angry and got in my car.|I didn't know where to go.
- Did I wake Mom?|- No, no, no. She's asleep.
So, do you wanna, you know--
Yeah, sure, I can talk about it.|It's not, you know-- It's fine.
- 'Ca-- If you don't wanna, it's okay,|'cause I could just make up the sofa.|- No, no, that's-- it's okay.
Thanks.
- Pretzel?|- No, thanks.
All right.|Here's what happened.
When I was leaving work today,|my boss calls me in, tells me|what a great job I'm doing...
and says I have as much promise|as anyone she's hired|since she's been at the firm.
Then she said the great part. She said|that she's been asked to select...
one person from my level|to be part of a design team...
that's gonna design the new|Boston Museum of Contemporary|Art, and she picked me.
- That's fantastic.|- I know. I was completely thrilled.
Plus, to live in Boston.|I love Boston.
- You have to, uh--|- Move to Boston. Yeah.
I need to be there right after|the baby's born, by October.
- Uh-huh.|- I knew when they hired me...
that this was a possibility|one day, and Bryan knew it too.
But now, well-- I rush home|to tell him the news, and as soon as|I say the word ''Boston,'' his face drops.
I mean, this is the kind of opportunity|everybody dreams about, and we're|talking Massachusetts here, not Mars.
So Bryan doesn't wanna go?
Well, he said that he understood|that career-wise it was great for me,
but with the baby coming,|he figured I wouldn't wanna go.
- Which is--|- Ridiculous.|- Right.
It's like under that mellow,|'90s Gap ad exterior of his...
beats the heart of a 1950s|husband that just expects me to|take a backseat to his career.
- You said that to him?|- Of course.
To which he said I was nuts,|and that all he meant was that|with us having a new baby,
it just seemed like a crazy time|to move to sub-zero weather|and a city full of strangers,
and that I should think|of you guys...
and of his parents, and how moving so|far away would be so hard on everyone.
Anyway, I knew if anybody would|understand how I felt, it would be you.
You were the one that always told me|to go for my dreams, never to settle.
Dad, tell me.|Am I being unreasonable to want to go?
Because if you think I am,|I won't go. I won't.
Ann, you have to go.|This is not the Dark Ages.
We'll still see each other all the time.|You'll just be an airplane ride away.
That's exactly|what I said.
And wasn't Bryan the one|who said you were a gifted architect...
- and he'd move anywhere you got a job?|- Yes.
And wouldn't you move for him if he|was the one being offered the promotion?
In a minute.
Oh, gosh, that must be him.
- Hi.|- Hi.
Hi, Dad.
Um, Annie, I-I realize|that-- that--
Did you tell your dad?
Sorry, George.|I didn't mean to be so lame.
Hey, you guys go ahead.|It's not up to me.
Okay. Annie, I realized|after you left that, uh,
if the same thing happened to me,|you'd come with me anytime, anywhere.
- I would.|- So I wanna do the same for you.
- God, honey, I am so sorry l--|- Oh.
I just don't want you|to ever resent me for this.
Hey, I can work out of Boston|just as easy as I can work out of L.A.
And I don't want you|to ever resent me, ever.
- Okay. So then we're goin'.|- Okay.
The baby has hiccups.
- Oh, yeah.|- Did you feel that?|- Yes.
Boston.
As I watched the kids pull|out of the driveway, I got an|all-too-familiar pain in my gut.
The one I always got when I did|something for one of the kids|that fell under the heading of,
''I did it for their own good.''
And then I thought|about baby number three...
and 25 more years|of moments like this.
And suddenly,|I was tired.
I'll be able to do it again.|I'm sure I can.
All right. lf it swishes,|no problem.
Father of the Year.
Not swishes!|Just goes in! Well.
- Oh, it's frying!|- Well, we made it to July.
The Farmer's Almanac said|it was the hottest month L.A.|had seen in over half a century.
- Did you see it?|- Nina was four weeks from her due date,
- and Annie was two days past hers.|- Howard! Howard!
Franck and his crew were working|around the clock to have|the baby's room ready by D day.
Life was hectic,
- especially once Annie moved in.|- I better go.
Bryan was called to an emergency|meeting in Japan, and since|Annie's doctor assured us...
that the baby was at least|another week away,
-Bryan took the red-eye to Tokyo|and left Annie in our care.|-Bye.
So there I was, living with|two extremely pregnant women...
- during the worst heat wave|of the century.|- Okay. Okay.
Annie and Nina dealt with|the heat by adding extra|air conditioners to the house,
turning our home into|the only igloo in San Marino.
- How we doing, girls?|- Good.|- Dad, would you mind...
- adjusting the pillow behind my back?|- Sure, sure.
- Yeah. George. George.|- Oh, thank you.
Prop that pillow up|under my foot, would you please?
- Here we go. Here we go.|- Thank you, honey.|- Lemonade?
Thank you, yes.|Oh, and George,
- would you please scratch|my left ankle?|- Mm-hmm.
My mission was to keep them|calm and comfortable.
I tied their shoes, massaged their|backs, painted their toenails...
and went to every imaginable|take-out restaurant in the city.
Oh! Oh! Oh!|Gotta go get dinner.
- Matty, hold down|the fort while I'm gone.|- Okay, Dad.
George! Turn the air conditioning up|on your way out. It's stifling in here.
Oh, boy.
Uh, now, you all have|my beeper number just in case.
- Shut the door!|- Shut the door!
Here we go. Here we go.|Dinnertime. Dinnertime. All right.
- Thai noodles with chicken,|white meat only.|- That's me.
- Oh, yeah, Annie.|- And let's see.
- Uh, Taco Grande.|- Mm, honey. Yes.|- Extra rice, no beans.
- Ooh. Mmm. Thank you, honey.|- All right. Uh, lox, bagels|and cream cheese.
Thanks, Dad.
All right now.|Where's Dad's? Where's Dad's?
As the days rolled by|and nothing happened,
the tension mounted.
I found myself watching Annie|as if she were a time bomb.
- Ouch!|- What?|- What?
Ouch. O-U-C-H.
- Oh!|- Hey, good word.|- Honey.
- Ohh.|- That's 20 points.
Every night we laid out our clothes|so we could grab them in a hurry.
We were like firefighters ready|to jump at the first alarm.
Okay. Okay.
I'm hot!
- Good night.|- Good night.
It's about that time.
- George!|- All right, everybody stay calm!|- Okay. Okay.
Now, I've mapped out the|various routes to the hospital.|We can, uh-- Oh, it's just, uh--
What, uh, what time is it?|It's, uh-- All right, it's 11:36. 11:36.
All right.|So that would be 11:36.
Plan ''F,'' uh, route ''B.''
We can be there in 17 minutes.|Annie, don't worry.|We got everything under control.
What is this?|What am I wearing?
My blouse.
- Oh, honey!|- What? What happened?|- Oh, my God.
- Sorry. False alarm.|- Oh, sweetheart.|- Well, that doesn't--|- It's all right.
- Don't worry about it.|- That's okay.|- I'm sorry.|- That's not unusual.
- Are you okay?|- Don't worry about it.|- That can happen.
We'll be back|before you know it.
We got home just|as the sun came up.
The girls fell right|to sleep...
as I headed off to work.
Hello! It's fabric day.
- Hello, George.|- Hi.|- A pleasure to see you.
And oddly enough, knowing Franck was|at the house made me feel better,
although I have no idea|what he did there all day.
Do the baby workout|Make the babies gleeful
Oh, that's good.|That's good!
Little tin soldier|Happy tin soldier
Right. And now|with an attitude.
Hello! Who you?
Get away! I don't|like what you say! Now, leg up--
Uh-oh. Mom! Dad!
- I'll get it. What flavor?|- No flavor. This is it.
Good. I didn't even|get undressed this time.
Where's my chart?
- George, don't forget the suitcase!|- I won't!
Dad, keys!
You'd think I could tell the difference|between labor pains and indigestion.
- Yeah.|- I'm really sorry, Mom. Really.
- Mom?|- I understand, honey.
You know, I think-- Oh, boy,|I think I just gotta--
- I'm gonna lie down here|just for a sec.|- Oh, me too.
I'm gonna go catch|a few winks before I--
Dad, where've you been?|I'm late for camp!
- Camp. Camp.|- Come on!
At this point I hadn't|slept in 48 hours.
Have a good day|at work, George.
Yeah, Dad. Good night.
Ohh.
Hello! Pappala's home!|We got a surprise for you, George.
I'm sorry I can't stay,|George,
but I-- Whoops! I caught a cold|from your house.
Come on, George.|Hurry up. ''Quick-ah.''
I'm too tired|to ''kovick-ah.''
Okay, George, this is it.|The baby suite is finished.
Think of it, buddy.|After today, I'm out of your hair.
- Did we come in on budget?|- Close enough, George. Close enough.
- Now close those eyes.|- Oh, Franck, I'm not|gonna close my eyes.|- Don't ''oh, Franck'' me.
You never wants to have any fun.|Close those eyes.
- All right.|- Drumroll, if you please.
Okay, open up.
Welcome to babyland.
- It's beautiful.|- Thank you, sir.
I mean it.|It's perfect.
Oh, well, coming from you, George Banks,|that-- that means a lot.
A lot.
A whole lot.
And here's the bill.|Ju-Just don't go nuts, George.
Just-Just-Just try to remember, uh, what|you feel right at this minute, okay?
In fact, do me a favor.|Maybe you open it after I leave.
That will be better.
- George!|- He's up here and he loves it!
Oh, well, good!|Honey, dinner's ready.
- She cooked?|- She wants to give you a break.
She's been cooking up a storm all day|in that freezing kitchen.
What's the matter, George?|You look a little pooped.
Oh, I haven't slept in three days.|You know, I try to sleep at work,
but I keep thinking any minute|one of 'em's gonna go into labor|and I'll just end up--
Totally wired. Trust me.|I know the feeling.
And do you know how|I spell relief? V-A-T-S-N-I-K.
- V-A-T-S-N-I-K?|- Vatsnik.
The best sleeping pill in|the whole wide world. I swear by them.
Oh, no, no, no.|I don't take sleeping pills.
Oh, George, you need|your rest. You do.
What if they need you,|and you're walking into walls?
Believe me, I never take pills myself|neither. But sometimes, I need to rest.
So I take a half a Vatsnik,|close my eyes, and I wake up a new man,
refreshed and replenished|and ''roaring'' to go.
Just-- You know what?|Keep them. They're very mild.
- Mild?|- Oh, yeah. No, y-y-you'll|thank me. You'll see.
- George, Franck, dinner!|- On our way. ''Quick-ah.''
I'm so happy that you|like the room, George.
Sit next to me|at dinner, okay?
- Hi, Dad.|- Hey, Matty. How was camp?
- Good.|- Ann, how're you feelin'?
Great. Really energized.|Bryan's coming home tomorrow.
- Don't think we'll see|any action tonight?|- Don't think so, Dad.
- Hey, honey. How're you feelin'?|- Oh, good. Fine.
- Went to the doctor today.|- And?|- And right on schedule.
Three weeks.
Hmm. Well, here goes.
- Dad, what are you taking?|- Well, Dad hasn't been|sleeping so well lately,
so I thought I'd take|a couple of very mild sleeping pills.
Hmm.
Please pass the rolls.
Thanks.
Dad?
- What's he doing? What's going on?|- George? George?
I never saw anything like it.|He said, ''Pass the rolls.''
- By the time I passed them,|he was gone.|- George!
- Georgie, love, what is wrong?|- Oh, my God! George?|- George! George!
- He's not dead, Mom. He just|took two sleeping pills.|- George, baby.
- Are you all right?|- He took them both?|- You gave him sleeping pills?
He said he could not sleep, but|two Vatsnik is like, ''Good-bye,|George, see you next Thursday.''
- George! Oh, my! George!|- I didn't think he would|take them both, you know.
- Look at him! He's like--|- Truth is, I take half|a Vatsnik and I'm a goner.|- Honey!
- He took them both at once?|- Looked that way to me.
Well, at least he'll sleep,|you know. Matthew, help me|get him into the living room.
- Can I help in some way?|- No, no, no. We men can do it.
- On three we lift, Matthew.|- Okay.|- One, two, and we go.
- George?|- Oh!
Drop that boy on me.|Am I moving?
- Oh, yes, you're moving.|- Oh, that's good.|- Oh, dear. Oh, Franck.
- Going down.|- Oh, God, are you all right?|- Am I getting shorter?
- Oh, no.|- Help me, baby.|- Second strength.|- Okay. Okay.
Okay.
- Franck?|- Yeah?|- Is he breathing?
- Yes, breathing and drooling.|- Oh, honey. Oh, dear.
- There you go!|- Oh! Oh!|- Mom?
Oh, what are Vatsnik anyway? I've never|heard of it. Are they prescription?
Not yet. They're from my country.|They're not exactly legal.
But trust me,|there are no funny side effects.|I've been taking them for years.
Oh, yeah. Okay. He's going to be fine.|Don't you worry.
- Um, Mom?|- Well, if he's so fine,|why are you taking his pulse?
- Mom!|- Well, just to check it.|Pulse excellent. See? He's fine.
- He'll just sleep like|a little lamb. Okay.|- Oh, George.|- Nina!
- What?|- Mom, this is it.|I'm not kidding this time.
- Are you sure?|- Yes. I'm gonna have this baby tonight.
All right, Franck. Franck,|we need you to drive us to the hospital.
- No, no! No, no!|- I'm too big to get|behind the wheel, Franck.
Franck! Franck! Franck,|we need you. Could you drive us|to the hospital, Franck?
Huh? Okay. Thank you.
Yes, the hospital.|I'll drive you there.
- I'll take the suitcase.|- Okay, come on. Come on. Let's go.|- I'll be there in a moment.
- Hurry up. Hurry.|- Ladies, not to worry.|We have no problem.
- Good. Then hurry.|- Hey, Mom, can I drive?|- No.
George! Wake up!|Please, wake up!
You're gonna be|a grandpappala.
Oh, George, don't do this!|I am not a husband! I am not|a father! I'm not a 9-1-1 man!
Come on. Rise and shine,|you big white-haired man.
There we go. All right. Look at that.|All right. Okay.
We're on our way! All right.|Now-- oh, now we're clippin'.
Right, left.|Right, left.
Left, right. Right.
We're clippin' along, George.
Oh, no. Oh, George.|We're almost there!
And we move. Okay.|And a running start.
On the Atchison, Topeka--
There! Moving.|Moving, George.
Ohh!
Gee, I'd change this room.
This is not the time|to think about that! Let's get the head.
Okay, okay.|Any day now!
We're on our way!
Look who's up!|He wouldn't miss it for the world.
Franck! Wrong way!
Right turn here.|Right!
How's the maternity|department doing?
I'm hangin' in there.|Just hurry, please.
- George, get ahold of yourself!|- Make a left here!
- Where?|- Left here!|- Left here!|- Oh, right!
Hey, man,|what's with that face, huh?
Is that supposed to be me?
Hey, you got a problem,|loser?
We have no problem with nobody!|Just ''leaf'' us alone!
''Leaf'' you alone?|What are you, a tree?
Yes, I am. That's very funny.|Ha, ha, ha. You're obviously a comedian.
Very good.|Don't nobody look at them.
Hey, that's a nice accent, man.|What planet are you from, huh?
What planet? The planet of not|wanting to die by a drive-by shooting!
Lock the doors!|Quick! Quick!
Where ya goin', man?
You all right?|Now just breathe in and out.
- Yeah.|- Breathe slowly.
Yes, thank you. I will. I'm just not|used to all this hod-rodding business.
- She was talkin' to my sister.|- Oh.
Look who's walking all by himself!|Let's go over here, George.
Oh, George, honey. It's really|happening. This is it. Now, Franck.
- Yeah?|- I'm gonna go upstairs with|Annie to meet her doctor.
- Sure.|- So I want you and Matty|to get George some coffee.
- And then I'll meet you in|the waiting room, all right?|- Of course! No problem! Yes.
- How are you doing?|- I have the chair|for the prostate exam.
- Mr. Lemisch?|- He'll be out in a sec.|He's in the john.
Oakhurst Emergency.|Slow down. Slow down.
Oh, Mr. Lemisch.
- You all ready?|- Oh, yeah.
People, please, we got a pregnant|lady here. Can we get a move on?
- Buddy, we got it covered.|Are you doin' okay?|- Yeah, I think so.
- The contractions are|about five minutes apart.|- Okay, hold on.
This chariot's gonna move.|You gonna need a chair too?
- No, no. I'm fine.|- Annie, see you after?|- Definitely. Bye.
Okay, keep breathing.|You're gonna be just fine.
- Where your father go?|- I don't know. He was just here.
Bring him on in.|I'm ready.
Excuse me!|Do I know you?
Come on, Annie.|Come on.
Keep breathing.|It's almost over.
Almost.
Okay, the worst is over.|Almost gone, honey.
You did it.
- Doin' real good, Ann.|- Thanks.
Look who's back|from the dead.
- Hi.|- Oh, honey.|- Dad, you're up.
Matthew and I are gonna go|to the cafeteria for some Coca-Colas.
So, ju-- You just--
- How're you doing?|- Okay.|- So far, so good.
We called Bryan and he checked out of|his hotel, but nobody knows where he is.
And Dr. Brooks--|Wait a minute.
- You hang on.|- Dr. Brooks's kid broke|her arm at camp...
- so he had to fly|to Maine this morning.|- Dr. Brooks is in Maine?
Yeah.
- Hi, Annie. I'm Dr. Eisenberg.|- Hi.
- Let's see how you're doin' here, okay?|- Okay.
I'll be filling in|for Dr. Brooks today.
- And you're Annie's--|- Oh.|- Parents.
You're, uh-- Y-You're, uh--|Y-You-re-- You're gonna, uh, actually--
Yes, I am. Annie, actually,|everything looks real good here,
so I'm just gonna check now to see what|kind of progress you're making, okay?
- Okay.|- We'll wait outside.
Nina, this is-- this is no good.|We got to get another doctor.|She looks younger than Annie.
- Do you have any change?|- No, George. Anyway,
Dr. Brooks said she's|absolutely fantastic.
- Nina, this is our daughter|we're talking about.|- Hey, I know.
What if something goes wrong?|I mean, how much experience...
- could she have six months|out of medical school?|- Well--
- Did you see the name|on her tag? Megan.|- Yes.
- No real doctor is named Megan.|- Hey.|- I mean, what, uh-- what--
- How many babies could she|have delivered, two?|- Actually, 341.
Not counting the two|I delivered this morning.
- You can come back in now.|- Well, thank you.
Annie's doing great. Now,|the contractions are still irregular,
but they're getting kind of intense,|so it could take just a few more hours.
So just, um, just remind her|now to relax between contractions, okay?
- You're going somewhere?|- Oh, just down the hall, Mr. Banks.
Oh, hey, you're|wearing Sidekicks.
- Oh, don't you love 'em?|They're all I wear.|- Yeah, me too.
Yeah, well,|they're the best.
So when's your baby due,|Mrs. Banks?
- Uh--|- Are you okay?|- Oh, no, I feel fine.
It's just, uh, I have|this funny pain. It's kinda sharp.
- You're almost 40 weeks?|- Mm-hmm. Uh, uh-oh. Here's another one.
Okay, let's go across the hall.|I'll see what's going on.
Oh, no, no, no.|Oh, no, I'm perfectly fine.
- Really.|- I'd feel much better really|if you let me take a look.
- And Mr. Banks can stay with Annie.|- Oh, I'll be right back.
- Okay? Don't worry.|- Okay?|- Honey, fine.
- You okay?|- Mm-hmm.
The doctor seems|pretty together.
- She's young.|- Well, so what? So are you.
Doesn't mean you couldn't|design a skyscraper.
- All right. All right.|- Just tell me when it's over, will you?
Okay, you're doing great.|Just breathe in. And now breathe out.
- Breathe out.|- I can't.
Okay, the worst is over.
- You're sure?|- Absolutely. Coming down, way down.
It's almost over.|Down to nothing. There we are.
Okay. Okay. I'm okay.
That was short, but horrible.
- Annie, can I steal|your dad for a second?|- Yeah.
- You're hanging in there?|- Mm-hmm.
Okay.
- Save my seat.|- I will. Hurry.
- Mr. Banks, your wife is in labor.|- Very funny. Where is she?
She's putting on a gown and getting|hooked up to a fetal monitor.
No, no, no, no. My-My daughter's|in labor. My son-in-law's not here.
And my wife is the solid one|that will--
Are you sure? We have a lot|of false alarms in our family.
Her cervix is already dilated|five centimeters.
Now, the way she's going, your baby|could be born before your grandchild.
Now, I'm okay.|I can handle this. Can you?
Okay. Why don't you go congratulate|Mrs. Banks and I'll check on Annie.
You know, it's pretty cool, actually.|If they both deliver before midnight,
they'll have the same birthday.
Dr. Eisenberg,
these women are my life.
I know.
Nice timing, I know.|How's Ann?
Well, she's doing good.|How 'bout you?
Oh, George, I haven't|packed my bag.
We haven't even practiced|that Lamaze stuff yet. It's just--
Oh!
- You're having a contraction, huh?|- Yeah, I know.
- Yeow.|- You okay?
Just promise me-- promise me you'll stay|with Annie, George. She needs you.
- You know I will.|- Okay.
- Nina.|- What?
We're gonna have|a baby tonight.
I know.
Isn't it just amazing?
You know, we haven't even|locked in on any names yet.
Ah, okay.|Now, I was thinking...
Megan if it's a girl,|and Franck if it's a boy.
Franck Banks. It's got kind of a|continental ring to it, don't you think?
Can't you see him walking around|the house with his little ascot?
George, go check on Annie.
Tell her I'm fine, all right?|Oh, boy.
These contractions are|really coming fast, honey.
But go, go. I'm fine.|And, oh, check on Matty, honey.
And, George? George.
I don't know what|I was gonna say.
Okay.
Okay, hang in there.|A little more.
- That one was a bitch, huh?|- Yeah.|- Hey.
- Pappala, we're getting closer.|- How're you doin'?|- Hi.|- You okay?
- Yes, that's better. Thanks.|- Fine. Good.|- Dad, how's Mom?
Well, uh, sh-she's, uh--|You're not gonna believe this.
- She's not in labor?|- She is, actually.
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God.|- This is some night.
- More ice.|- I'll get it!|- I'll get it!|- No, no, no. I'll get it.
- All right.|- You just, uh-- You just stay there.|- Dad, you should--
- Hold on.|- I got you. I got you.
Go to Mom. I'll be fine.
- The ice man arrives.|- Almost. Almost. Almost. There we are.
There we go. More ice.
Really, Dad, I can handle this now.|You stay with Mom.
Well, she did say she wanted|some ice. I could take this to|her and be back in two seconds.
- How about I find a doctor and get|an update here, okay? Be right back.|- Okay.
- You just-- You just--|- Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere.
- Oh! This is very good.|- Okay.|- Mm-hmm.
- Franck. I need you, buddy.|- I'm here, buddy.
- Anything. What?|- W-Well, I need you to help me.|Can you hang in here with me?
Of course. I will hang in|until I hear those babies cry.
I don't know what I'm doing exactly, but|I will keep doing that. You know that.
- Well, I thought you|could stay with Annie.|- Good.
-And then I could check on Nina.|-Fine.|-Then maybe we could switch.
Yeah. George?
We're bonding here,|aren't we?
- I think we are, Franck.|- Someone's buzzing me|awful bad in here.
Go on. Don't worry.|I'm on the case.
Okay. Oh, George. George?|I think I'm almost there.
Yeah, Dad, don't go too far.|We may need you.
Dad? Dad!
- We're moving her into delivery.|- Okay. I'm ready. Let's do it.
- Dad?|- Baby.
Doctor.
What's going on?|What's wrong?
Nina, your contractions|are really close together...
and the baby's just not handling|it as well as we'd like.
The baby's heart rate has dropped.|Now, we're gonna watch it carefully...
and if it doesn't go back up in a couple|of minutes, I wanna do a C-section...
- and get the baby out.|- Oh, George.
Mr. Banks, I'm concerned|your wife's going to need to|be delivered in the next few minutes...
- and obviously I can't be|in two places at once.|- Right.
Everything's going beautifully|with Annie. Her labor's|progressing very well.
I'd like to turn her over|to the chief resident.
I have complete|confidence in him.
I just feel that it's more important|that I stay with your wife.
- Is that okay with you?|- Yeah, fine.
If the baby's heart rate doesn't go up,|how long does it take to--
Once I get her in the operating|room, I can have the baby out|in 60 seconds if I have to.
We're still okay.
- We're in labor in room number four.|- Okay.
- Get Dr. Wagner up here.|- Right.
- Dad! Is Mom okay?|- She's fine. Don't worry.
- Okay.|- Hi, Annie. I'm Dr. Wagner.
- Hi.|- Hold on. We're almost there.|- Okay.
- Bryan!|- Annie!
Oh. Oh, God.
- I hope he's the husband.|- He is.
- How'd you know we were here?|- Well, I got to the folks' house...
and saw the tray|of uneaten lasagna.
- I'm so glad I made it.|- Me too.
Slow down, kids.|This is our stop.
Dad, if--
- Just go. Go.|- Okay.
I don't see enough of an improvement,|Nina. Let's get you delivered.
- Pat, we're on our way.|- Okay.
- Nina.|- Oh, George.
What if she doesn't|get the baby out in time?
- She will.|- Excuse me.
- Hey, you know what I|was thinkin' about?|- What?
- I was thinkin' about our first date.|- Oh, yeah.
The one you showed up|an hour late for?
- Oh, actually, I wasn't an hour late.|- Yes, you were, George.
You showed up as I was pulling|away from the restaurant.
Well, that's not exactly|what happened.
Actually, I got there on time.|I told you this.
- Never.|- I didn't?
Remember, you told me I'd know|you because you'd be wearing|that red turtleneck?
- Oh, George.|- And I just...
stood in the window and I watched|you walk to that booth in the back.
And you were so|incredibly beautiful.
I was afraid to go in.|And I--
- And I just stood there,|- Excuse me.
watching you sip your water|and talk to the waiter,
and I just fell in love|with you.
George.
And when you left, I watched you|get in your V.W. bug...
and I saw your hair blowing out|the side of the window, and--
and you started to drive off, and I|just got afraid I'd never see you again.
That's when I almost|ran you over.
Thanks for telling me this,|George.
Thanks for marrying me, Nina.
We're ready.
Dad, it's a boy.|We have a son.
Congratulations.|How's Annie?
Perfect.|She's just perfect.
He's so cute.|Seven pounds, nine ounces.
- How's Nina?|- I'm, uh, still waiting.
Yeah. Well, I guess|I-I better get back.
- Go.|- Okay.
It's wonderful.|Give Annie a kiss for me.
I will.
I'm a grandfather.
Mr. Banks?
I have someone|that I'd like you to meet.
It's a girl.
I love girls.
- How's Nina?|- She's excellent. She did beautifully.
Am I nuts, or is this|the most beautiful baby ever born?
She's perfect.
Oh. Would you tell Nina|she has a grandson?
I will. Congratulations.
And thanks.
My pleasure.
Hey. Hey.
Hi, beauty. Hi.
Dad, you gotta see him.
Annie says he looks|just like you.
- Come here, you.|- Boy.
- Oh, that's yours?|- She's a daughter.
- Oh, she's beautiful.|- Say. Say.
It was at that moment, with my daughter|in one arm and my grandson in the other,
that I realized life isn't|gonna get much better than this.
- Oh, there he is.|- Oh, let me see him.
- Ohh!|- Hi, Dad. Mom.
- There they are.|- Oh, my God. They're so sweet!
Hello!
Before we knew it,|two months had passed,
and it was time|to say good-bye.
Have you got the stroller?
I guess we're off.
That's it.
Mom?
- Oh, honey.|- I'll miss you.
- Knock 'em dead, okay?|- Okay, I'll try.
- Let me hug George good-bye,|okay? Can I?|- Ohh. Yeah.
- Hi. Hi. Are you George?|Oh, you're George.|- Can I get a little hug?
- Can I hold him?|- Huh?|- Yeah, sure.
- Okay.|- Yeah.|- All right, honey. Okay.
- Two hands.|- Two hands.|- Two hands.
Yes. Good.
- Well.|- Well, good-bye. Take care.
- Bye.|- We'll call you.|- Okay.
See you, George.
We'll call ya.
Bye, Megan.|Call me, okay?
I may be your nephew's mother,|but I'm still your big sister.
- Here. I got her a going-away present.|- Hey. Okay.
Thanks.
You better get going if you're|gonna get to Phoenix before dark.
Yeah, we better.
Okay, well, remember. If you're|ever up for a 3:00 a.m. feeding,|it'll be 6:00 in Boston.
So, you know,|don't hesitate.
- I'll take him. Oh, sleepy.|- Hey, wait a minute.
I haven't had a chance to kiss|my grandson good-bye yet.
Hey, buddy.
I got ya. I got ya.
We are named well, George.|Don't let the other kids tease|you. It's a good, solid name.
- His last name's not Zenkman, is it?|- No.
Well, good. Hmm? Oh!|Oh, he got me.
Got me. Do it again.|Hey, do it again. Come on.
Oh! He got me.
Oh!
Hey. Yeah, I got ya.|I got ya.
Well, I guess we gotta go.
- Bye.|- I'll take him, George.|- Okay.
- There we go.|- Bye, Matty. Be good.
- Bye.|- Bye, Mom.|- Bye.
- Don't forget to buckle your seat belt.|- Okay, Dad.
- You too, Bryan.|- I will, Dad. So we'll|talk to you tonight?
And it's hard to see out the rear view,|so go slow and let people pass you.
We will, Dad.
- Okay.|- Bye.
- Bye.|- Bye!
Take care!
- Bye!|- Bye!
- Okay.|- ''Okay'' what?
Okay, let's finish|your science project.
- It's not due 'til Thursday.|- Let's get a jump on it then, huh?
I don't look too old|to be your father, do I?
Hey, you're already laughing|at me. What took you so long? Hey.
Bet you can't do this.|I can teach you that.
I can teach you|all kinds of tricks.
How to pass behind your back,|how to sink it shooting backwards.
I taught your big sister.|I can teach you.
Megan, you wanna see the court?|I don't think you've seen it yet.
We got lights and everything.|We can play at night,|one-on-one, just you and me.
Grab your coat|and get your hat
Leave your worries|on the doorstep
And just direct your feet
To the sunny side|of the street
Can't you hear the pitter-pat
Yeah, that happy tune|is your step
Life can be so sweet
On the sunny side|of the street
I used to walk|in the shade
With my blues on parade
But now I'm not afraid
'Cause this rover|has crossed over
If I never have a cent
I'll be rich|as that Trump fella
There'll be gold|where I step my feet
On the sunny side
On the sunny side|of the street