[ Woman ]
~ Raindrops on roses ~
~ And whiskers on kittens ~
~ Bright copper kettles ~
~ And warm woolen mittens ~
~ Brown paper packages ~
~ Tied up with string ~
~ These are a few ~
~ Of my favorite things ~
[ Duke Narrating ] We were somewhere
around Barstow, on the edge of the desert...
when the drugs
began to take hold.
[ Duke ]
I remember saying something like:
I feel a bit lightheaded.
Maybe you should drive.
~ [ Continues ]
- Hmm?
- Suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us...
and the sky was full of
what looked like huge bats...
- [ Bats Screeching ]
- all swooping and screeching and diving around the car.
- And a voice was screaming:
- Holy Jesus, what are these goddamned animals?
- [ Grunting ]
- [ Rock Continues ] ~ Come on, baby ~
- Did you say something?
- Hmm?
Never mind.
It's your turn to drive.
No point in mentioning
these bats, I thought.
The poor bastard'll
see them soon enough.
~ Baby, I'm startin'
to feel human ~
- ~ Ohh, ohh, yeah ~
- ~ Hey, hey, Feel with me, baby ~
- [ Grunting ]
- ~ 'Cause I feel it comin' on ~
~ [ Continues ]
- [ Screeching Continues ]
- Fucking pigs! Flying!
[ Grunting, Murmuring ]
We had two bags of grass...
five sheets of
high-powered blotter acid...
a salt shaker
half-full of cocaine...
a whole galaxy of multicolored
uppers, downers, screamers, laughers.
Also a quart of tequila,
a quart of rum, a case of beer...
- a pint of raw ether...
- Shit!
two dozen amyls.
Not that we needed all that
for the trip...
but once you get locked into
a serious drug collection...
the tendency is to push it
as far as you can.
The only thing that really
worried me was the ether.
There is nothing in the world more
helpless and irresponsible and depraved...
than a man in the depths
of an ether binge...
and I knew we'd get into
that rotten stuff pretty soon.
[ Radio: Female Newscaster ] A House
subcommittee report says illegal drugs killed...
last year...
- [ Tuning ]
- ~ One toke over the line Sweet Jesus ~
One toke, man!
[ Singing Along With Radio, Slightly
Behind ] ~ One toke over the line ~
~ Sittin' downtown
at a railway station ~
~ One toke over the line ~
- One toke, you poor fool?
- ~ Sweet, sweet Mary ~
Wait'll you see
those goddamned bats, man.
~ Mine ~
[ Radio Continues ]
~ One toke over the line ~
- Let's give that boy a lift.
- What? No!
- ~ [ Ends ]
- Wait!
We can't stop here.
This is bat country.
Hot damn! I never rode
in a convertible before!
Is that right? Well, I guess
you're about ready then, aren't ya?
We're your friends. We're not
like the others, man. Really.
No more of that talk, or I'll
put the leeches on you. Understand?
[ Gonzo Giggling ]
Get in.
How long could we maintain,
I wondered.
How long before one of us starts raving
and jabbering at this boy?
What will he think then?
This same lonely desert was the last
known home of the Manson family.
Would he make that grim connection
when my attorney starts screaming...
about bats and huge manta rays
coming down on the car?
If so, well, we'll just have to
cut his head off and bury him somewhere.
- 'Cause it goes without saying that we can't turn him loose.
- [ Muttering ]
He'd report us at once to some kind of
outback Nazi law enforcement agency...
and they'll run us down
like dogs.
- Jesus, did I say that, or just think it?
- Jesus, did I say that?
Was I talking?
Did they hear me?
It's okay. Just admiring
the shape of your skull.
- No, thanks!
- Maybe I'd better have a chat with this boy.
- I have asthma!
- Perhaps if I explain things, he'll rest easy.
All right, listen.
There's one thing you should probably
understand- Can you hear me?
Good.
I want you to have
all the background.
- Aah!
- This is a very ominous assignment...
with overtones of
extreme personal danger.
I'm a Doctor of Journalism.
This is important, goddamn it!
- This is a fucking true story!
- [ Gasps ]
[ Gonzo Shouting ]
You fucking-
- Get your hands off my fucking head!
- [ Grunting ]
- Now, now, now.
- Our vibrations were getting nasty. But why?
Was there no communication
in this car?
- Had we deteriorated to the level of dumb beasts?
- [ Giggling ]
This man at the wheel
is my attorney.
He's not just some dingbat I found on
the Strip, man. He's a foreigner.
I think he's probably Samoan.
It doesn't matter, though, does it?
- Are you prejudiced?
- [ Whimpers ] Hell, no.
I didn't think so.
Because, in spite of his race,
the man is extremely valuable to me.
- Oh, shit. I forgot about the beer. You want some?
- No.
- How 'bout some ether?
- What?
Never mind. All right, let's get right
to the heart of this thing.
- Twenty-four hours ago we were
sitting... - ... in the Pogo Lounge...
of the Beverly Heights Hotel,
in the patio section, of course...
drinking Singapore Slings
with mescal on the side...
hiding from the brutish realities
of this foul year of our Lord, 1971.
[ Muttering ]
Cops were goin' apeshit-
Perhaps this is the call you've
been waiting for all this time, sir.
Perhaps.
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Mmm! Really. All right.
Yeah? Oh, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Okay. Bye.
- That was headquarters.
They want me to- - Ahem.
[ Coins Clatter On Ground ]
[ Whispers ]
Thank you.
They want me to go
to Las Vegas at once...
make contact with a Portuguese
photographer named Lacerda.
He'll have
all the details.
All I have to do is check into my
soundproof suite. He'll seek me out.
- What do you think?
- Sounds like real trouble.
You're gonna need plenty of legal
advice before this thing is over.
Oh, yeah.
As your attorney, I advise you to rent
a fast car with no top.
And you'll need
the cocaine.
Tape recorder
for special music.
Acapulco shirts.
Get the hell out of L.A.
for at least 48 hours.
- Blows my weekend.
- Why?
'Cause, naturally, I'm
gonna have to go with you.
We're gonna have to
arm ourselves to the teeth.
Well, why not?
I mean, if a thing's worth doing,
it's worth doing right.
This is the American Dream
in action.
Wait!
Shit, we'd be fools not to ride this
strange torpedo all the way out to the end.
Indeed.
We must do it.
What kind of story
is this?
It's the Mint 400...
the richest off-road race for motorcycles and
dune buggies in the history of organized sport.
It's a fantastic
spectacle...
in honor of some
fatback grosero...
who owns the luxurious Mint Hotel
in downtown Las Vegas.
At least that's what
the press release says.
As your attorney,
I advise you to buy a motorcycle.
How else can you cover
a thing like this righteously?
Well, we're gonna have to
drum it up on our own.
Pure Gonzo journalism.
[ Tires Screeching ]
Shit!
[ Tires Screech ]
[ Duke ] Getting hold of the drugs
and shirts had been no problem...
but the car and tape recorder were
not easy things to round up at 6:30...
on a Friday afternoon
in Hollywood.
Sounds beautiful.
Great. Hang on to it.
Fuckin' A, the gentleman has
a major credit card!
That's right, man. Don't take any guff
from these fucking swine.
I just got through
saying that.
Do you realize who the fuck
you're talking to? Do you?
Be over in 30 minutes.
[ Duke ]
We're gonna need a sound store.
- [ Gonzo ] We won't make the nut unless we have unlimited credit.
- We will, man.
You Samoans
are all the same.
You have no faith in the essential
decency of the white man's culture.
[ Duke Narrating ]
The store was closed...
but the salesman said
he could wait if we'd hurry.
- [ Horns Honking ]
- [ Sirens Wailing ]
But we were delayed en route when the
Stingray in front of us killed a pedestrian.
We had trouble again
with the car rental agency.
Mr. Duke, we're all settled. If I could
get your John Hancock, you're on your way.
- Yeah.
- You're gonna be real careful with this car, right?
Oh, yeah, man.
Of course.
[ Tires Screech ]
[ Panting ]
Holy smokes!
You just backed over a 2-foot concrete
abutment, you didn't even slow down.
What, were you going about, uh, oh, I
don't know, 45 miles an hour backwards?
- There's no harm done.
- Oh?
I always test the transmission that way,
the rear end for stress factors.
- Boy, this is really a nice pen, man.
- Hey, uh, listen, you-
you fellas haven't been,
uh, drinking, have you?
- No. Not me.
- Oh. Well-
- We're responsible people.
- [ Engine Revving, Tires Screeching ]
Damn it,
you've got my pen!
Goddamn hippies!
We spent the rest of that night rounding
up materials and packing the car.
Then we ate some mescaline
and went swimming.
Our trip was different.
It was to be
a classic affirmation...
of everything right and true
in the national character...
a gross physical salute to the fantastic
possibilities of life in this country.
But only for those
with true grit.
And we are chock full
of that, man.
Damn right!
My attorney understands this concept,
despite his racial handicap.
- But do you?
- [ Giggling ]
He said he understood, but I could
see in his eyes that he didn't.
- He was lying to me.
- [ Gonzo Screams ]
Ohh! Aaah!
Aaah! Aaah!
Ohhhhh!
Medicine!
- What?
- Medicine!
Medicine? Oh, yeah, medicine!
Right. Right here.
- [ Shrieking ]
- Don't worry. This man has a bad heart.
Angina pectoris.
But we have a cure for it.
Here you go. All right.
Big whiff. Big whiff.
Big whiff, sonny boy.
- Ah. There you go. Much better.
- [ Sighs ]
- Now for the doctor.
- [ Groans Loudly ]
[ Squealing ]
What the-
What the fuck are we doing out here
in the middle of the desert?
Somebody call the police.
We need help.
- We need help. We need help. We need help.
- [ Horn Honks ]
[ Laughing ]
The truth.
Truth?
We're goin' to Vegas...
to croak a scag baron
named Savage Henry.
- It's true.
- Why? Because I've known him for years...
but he ripped us off.
- [ Duke ] And you know what that means.
- And you know what that means.
- Right? -
No. - Mm-hmm.
Savage Henry...
has cashed
his check.
- Cashed his check.
- And we're gonna rip his lungs out.
- [ Hammer Clicking ]
- And eat them. That bastard won't get away with this.
I mean, what is going on
in this country...
when a scum sucker like that can get away
with sandbagging a Doctor of Journalism?
- Hey!
- Thanks for the ride!
- Don't worry about me! [ Giggling ]
- Wait a minute!
Come back
and have a beer!
Shit.
Fuck. I'm gonna miss him.
- Move over!
- Did you see his eyes?
We have to get out of California
before that kid finds a cop.
Scoot over,
you fat bastard.
- We had a real freak on our hands!
- Oh, shit.
[ Duke Narrating ] It was absolutely
imperative that we get to the Mint Hotel...
before the deadline
for press registration.
Otherwise we might have to
pay for our suite.
[ Screeches ]
Jesus! Did you see what God
just did to us, man?
God didn't do that.
You did it.
You're a narcotics agent.
I knew it.
That was our cocaine,
you fucking pig, swine, whore!
You'd better be careful.
Plenty of vultures out here that'll pick
your bones clean before morning.
- You fucking whore.
- Hee hee hee.
Here's your half
of the sunshine acid. Eat it.
Yeah.
Great.
How long do I have?
As your attorney, I advise you
to drive at top speed...
or it'll be a goddamn miracle if we can get
there before you turn into a wild animal.
- [ Muttering ]
- ~ [ Rock ]
~ Yeah, yeah ~
- ~ [ Continues ]
- Are you ready for that?
Checking into a Vegas hotel
under a phony name...
with intent to commit capital fraud
and a head full of acid?
I sure hope so.
[ Duke Narrating ] Thirty minutes.
It was going to be very close.
~ [ Continues ]
~ Well, she's all
you'd ever want ~
~ She's the kind
I'd like to flaunt ~
~ And take to dinner ~
[ Man On P.A. ]
Welcome to the Mint Hotel!
~ Well, she always
knows her place ~
~ She's got style
She's got grace ~
- ~ She's a winner ~
- [ Horn Honking ]
~ She's a lady ~
~ Whoa-whoa-whoa
She's a lady ~
Hmm? Mmm.
~ Talking about
my little lady ~
- Come on, take the ticket. We're busy here.
- ~ And the lady is mine ~
Come on, take the ticket.
Take it.
Take the ticket.
- ~ [ Continues ]
- I need this. Right?
I'll remember your face.
[ Duke Narrating ] There is
no way of explaining the terror I felt.
- ~ [ Continues ]
- [ On P.A. ] Attention, all Mint Hotel guests.
Will the owner
of a green Pinto...
Minnesota license plate
TGO432-
[ Duke Narrating ]
I was pouring sweat.
My blood is too thick
for Nevada.
I've never been able to properly
explain myself in this climate.
[ Man Chattering ]
[ Duke Narrating ]
Okay. Be quiet, be calm.
Name, rank
and press affiliation.
Nothing else.
...hamburger stand.
She was a waitress about 16 years old.
They chopped her goddamn head off right
there in the parking lot...
and cut all kinds of holes in her
and sucked out the blood.
They were after the pineal gland,
I think. Yeah.
- No. How's your mama?
- [ Duke ] ignore this terrible drug.
Yeah.
Pretend
it's not happening.
[ Grunts ]
[ Shouts ]
Hi there! Uhh-
My name?
Uh... Raoul Duke!
[ Muttering ] On the list.
Freelance. On the list, then?
Total coverage.
Uh-huh.
I have my attorney...
with me...
and I realize that his name
is not on that list...
but we must have
a suite!
[ Muttering ]
Must have that suite.
What's the score here?
What's next?
Your suite isn't ready yet...
but someone
was looking for you.
Aah! No! We haven't done
anything yet!
- I can handle this.
- [ Muttering ]
This man suffers
from a bad heart.
But I have plenty of medicine.
My name is Dr. Gonzo.
Prepare our suite at once.
We'll be in the bar.
Aaah!
[ Grunts ]
[ Woman ] I don't know about you,
but I'm startin' to feel that drink.
[ Chuckling ]
[ Growls ]
Hey, beat it.
Beat it. Go on.
[ Woman ]
I like the way you did that.
Aaah!
[ Whimpering ]
Come on.
Come on. Come on.
- What's that?
- Come on, come on. Let's get some peanuts.
That's one thing
that's good for you. Peanuts.
Ohh! Jesus!
- Two Cuba libres, beer and mescal on the side.
- You got it.
- [ Man ] I'll bet you're a Libra.
- Mmm.
[ Wild Laughter ]
[ Woman Moaning ]
Who's Lacerda? He's waiting
for us on the 12th floor.
Room 1250. Lacerda.
[ Duke Narrating ]
I couldn't remember.
- The name rang a bell, but I couldn't concentrate.
- [ Gurgling, Bubbling ]
Terrible things were happening
all around us.
[ Groans ]
Buy us some golf shoes...
otherwise we'll never
get out of this place alive.
Impossible to walk
in this muck.
No footing at all.
~ [ Continues ]
[ Woman On P.A. ] Mr. Roger Pratt,
please call the hotel operator.
~ How can I bear
to see your heart break ~
~ To see your heart break ~
~ Over me ~
~ [ Continues ]
[ Growling, Roaring ]
- ~ [ Continues ]
- [ Growling, Roaring Continue ]
I was right in the middle
of a fucking reptile zoo...
and somebody was giving booze
to these goddamn things.
It won't be long now
before they tear us to shreds.
[ Growling,
Roaring Continue ]
- ~ [ Continues ]
- [ Muttering Gibberish ]
[ Muttering, Roaring Continues,
Volume Increasing ]
- Please!
- [ Muttering, Roaring Stop ]
- Tell'em to get out their fucking golf shoes!
- [ Growled Gasps ]
Jesus God Almighty,
look at that bunch over there, man.
They've spotted us.
[ Gonzo ] That's
the press table, man.
We're gonna have to sign in
for our credentials.
Okay?
Are you ready?
- Hmm?
- Are you ready?
- Come on, hurry up.
- Wait! Don't leave me!
[ Boy ]
Two club sandwiches...
and, uh,
two more club sandwiches...
one, two, three, four
shrimp cocktails...
- Hmm? Hmm?
- and nine fresh grapefruit.
- [ Rumbling ]
- Vitamin C. Need all we can get.
- Four chicken-
- There's a, uh...
big machine in the sky,
some kind of...
- Quart of rum.
- well, electric snake coming straight at us.
[ Gonzo ]
Shoot it.
Not yet. I want
to study its habits.
- [ Boy ] You motorcycle people sure
are hearty eaters. Rumbling, Explosions ]
I need the cart.
I need to return with the cart.
Thank you, but the cart needs to
go back with- I'll be back!
- You bastard.
- I've been hit, man!
I leave you alone for 3 minutes and you start
waving that goddamn marlin spike around...
yelling about reptiles.
- What are you talking about?
- You scared the shit out of those people.
They were ready
to call the cops.
- Yes, sir, you were lucky I came back in time.
- Don't come fucking near me!
Explosions Continue ]
- Leave me alone.
The only reason they gave us press
passes was to get you out of there.
- [ Knock On Door ]
- Oh, God! What's that?
That scene straightened me
right out, man.
- Is it the door?
Explosions Continue ]
- [ TV Newscaster ] As the bombing
continues in Laos- - Just a minute.
- [ Knocking Continues ]
- Holy shit.
Oh, my God.
[ TV Newscaster Continues ]
Hi. I'm, uh, Lacerda,
your photographer.
- Duke?
- Mm-mmm.
Back there.
- [ TV ] It looks as though the
North Vietnamese may- - Duke? Duke?
Hi!
[ Laughs ]
Lacerda.
Your photographer.
You're not Portuguese, man!
Hey, too bad you guys
missed the bikes checkin' in.
Oh, man, what a sight!
- Husquavarnas, Yamahas, DMZs. Machine
Guns Firing, Volume Increasing ]
Kawasakis!
- Maicos. Pursang! Plane Engines
Roaring, Volume Increasing ]
- Swedish fireballs.
Volume Decreases, Quiets ]
Couple of Triumphs.
Here and there a CZ.
All very, very fast.
Very.
[ Chuckling ]
What a race
it's gonna be.
[ Chuckling Continues ]
Yeah.
I'm gonna let myself out.
We know what
you're up to, man.
Hmm?
[ TV Continues: Explosions,
Helicopter Blades Whirring ]
I'm gonna tell you-
He's lying to us.
I could see it in his eyes.
Eyes?
- [ TV Newscaster ] Late battle
reports indicate- - Panic now, Charlie.
[ Muttering ]
Turn this shit off.
The racers were ready
at dawn.
Very tense.
In some circles the Mint 400
is a far, far better thing...
than the Super Bowl,
the Kentucky Derby...
and the Lower Oakland Roller
Derby Finals all rolled into one.
Slow down!
This is a restricted area!
This race attracts
a very special breed.
- [ Mutters ] Fuck off.
- All right.
It was time to get grounded,
to ponder this rotten assignment...
- and figure out how to cope with it.
- Whoa!
It was time
to do the job.
Those of us who had been up all night
were in no mood for coffee and doughnuts.
We wanted strong drink.
- We were, after all...
- [ Gunshots ]
the absolute cream
of the national sporting press.
Pull!
We were gathered in Las Vegas for
this very special moment in sport.
- When it comes to a thing like this, they don't fool around.
- [ Gunshots Continue ]
[ Snoring ]
- It's, uh, just beautiful.
- [ Chuckling ]
[ Croupier ]
Money plays. Money plays.
Kill the body, the head will die.
Ali-Frazier fight.
- Crazy shit.
- A proper end to the '60s.
Ali beaten
by a human hamburger.
- Both Kennedys murdered by mutants.
- Hey, they're startin'!
Oh, shit, they're startin'.
Let's go!
[ Man On P.A. ]
Ladies and gentlemen...
welcome to the start of the
$50,000 Mint 400 Desert Race...
with a purse of $50,000
going to the winner...
of this grueling, gut-wrenching,
dust-eating...
in-your-face
motocross extravaganza!
And there they go!
We've got
rooster tails goin'!
We're here to spit
in your enemy's eye!
There they go.
[ Mutters ]
[ Man On P.A. ] All right, our second
group of ten is getting in place.
- Kawasakis, Triumphs, Maicos.
- [ Engines Revving ]
We're ready to go. It's the green flag,
and they're off!
Another great start with a lot of dirt
happening on this hill!
All right, here we go with
the third group. And they're off!
Number 45 riding
in the number-four position...
is choking
as the dust flies!
You'd better wet those bandannas
you got stretched over your face!
[ Cheering,
Engines Revving ]
[ Duke Narrating ] There was something
like 190 more bikes waiting to start.
- Gimme a beer, man.
- They were due to go off, ten at a time...
every two minutes.
There you go, buddy.
[ Blows Nose ]
[ Sighs ]
- Goddamn it. What day is it? Saturday?
- Shit.
- More like Sunday.
- Ahh.
Hello! Anyone?
Have you seen the race?
By 10:00 they were spread out
all over the course.
- Ohh!
- It was no longer a race.
Now it was
an endurance contest.
The idea of trying to cover this race in
any conventional press sense was absurd.
- Hey! It's pretty great, huh?
- What?
Come on in!
[ Shutter Clicking ]
I'm just gonna try different
combinations of lenses and film...
until I find something
that works in this dust!
[ Helicopter Blades Whirring ]
- What the hell?
- [ Machine Gun Fire ]
That's fucking machine guns.
They're firing at us. Machine guns!
- [ Gunfire Continues ]
- It's a goddamn war zone! Get us out of here quick!
- [ Lacerda ] Yeee-hoo! - Quick, man!
We're gonna be killed, for fuck's sake!
What the- Oh, no.
Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God.
Where's
the damn race?
Beats me, man.
We're just good, patriotic Americans
like yourself.
What outfit
you fellas with?
Oh. The sporting press.
We're friendlies.
Hired geeks.
Uh... yeah.
- Let's go.
- Yee-ooooh!
- Good luck, gentlemen.
- [ Machine Gun Fire Resumes ]
- Get him!
- Freaks.
- Take me back to the pits.
- No! No, no, no. We have to go on.
We need total coverage!
It was time, I felt, for an agonizing
reappraisal of the whole scene.
You're fired.
Awful jackass.
All right.
- Just drive into the dust!
- I never wanna see you again.
Just drive
into the dust!
Huh? Ohh.
The race was
definitely underway.
I had witnessed the start.
I was sure of that much.
But what now?
What comes next?
~ [ Pop ]
Put on the radio.
Turn on the tape machine.
Roll every
goddamn window down.
- ~ It's not unusual ~
- Let us taste this cool desert wind.
~ To be loved by anyone ~
- ~ [ Continues ]
- Ah, yes. This is what it's all about.
[ Duke Narrating ]
Total control now...
tooling along the main drag
on a Saturday night in Vegas.
Two good old boys
in a fire-apple red convertible...
stoned, ripped, twisted.
Good people.
Hot fuck.
That sounds heavy.
- Twenty-nine cent hot dogs.
- Mmm.
What are we doing here?
Are we here to entertain
ourselves or do the job?
Do the job, of course.
Here we go. Crab louie and a quart
of muscatel for $20.
- ~ It's not unusual ~
- As your attorney, I advise you to drive to the Tropicana.
Guy Lombardo. He's in the Blue Room
with his Royal Canadians.
- Why?
- Why? Why what?
Why should I pay my hard-earned dollars
to watch a fucking corpse?
I don't know about you...
- but in my line of business it's important to be hip.
- [ Tires Screech ]
What do you think
you're doing?
This is not a parking area!
You've got to move your car!
You can't park your car here.
Excuse me. Sir!
- What?
- You can't park- Hey!
You can't
park your car here!
Is this not
a reasonable place to park?
Reasonable? You're on a sidewalk!
It's a sidewalk!
- This is not a parking area!
- Debbie Reynolds?
- You can't park on the sidewalk!
- Seems like a hot ticket.
Drove all the way from L.A.
for this show.
We're friends
of Debbie's.
~ [ Orchestra ]
- Okay, bye.
- We'll see you later.
- [ Duke Narrating ] This was Bob Hope's turf.
- ~ Strangers in the night ~
Frank Sinatra's.
- ~ Exchanging glances ~
- Spiro Agnew's.
The place fairly reeked of high-grade
Formica and plastic palm trees.
Clearly a high-class refuge
for big spenders.
~ [ Continues ]
- It's started. Is she on stage?
- She is. Sold out.
Sorry, sir. Full house.
I'm sorry, sir.
We drove all the way
from L.A. for this show.
- There are no seats left at any price.
- Fuck seats!
- We're friends with Debbie. I
used to romp with her. - Mm-hmm.
~ [ Continues ]
- Are you prepared to go to court?
- Well, that depends.
I wanna talk to you
for a second.
- Your attitude constitutes a breach of faith.
- Uh, hi.
In Nevada,
that's illegal.
- What's your name?
- My name? Tony Pizzacata.
[ Gonzo ]
Tony Pizzacata.
[ Tony ]
What, may I ask, is your name, sir?
[ Gonzo ]
It's on my driver's license.
- I think we might be able to squeeze you in, sir.
- Ohh!
- Thank you kindly.
- You'll have to stand in the back.
After a lot of bad noise
he let us in for nothing...
provided we would stand
quietly in the back and not smoke.
~ [ Continues ]
[ Announcer ]
Ladies and gentlemen...
the Desert Inn is proud to present
the one, the only...
the incomparable
Miss Debbie Reynolds!
[ Backup Singers ]
~ Ooh, ooh-ooh ~
[ Debbie Reynolds ]
Good evening, ladies and gentlemen!
It's wonderful to be here
with you fabulous people!
Whoa!
Let's rock and roll!
~ Sgt. Pepper's
Lonely Hearts Club Band ~
- What the hell's going on?
- [ Giggling Hysterically ]
- Get'em out!
- Come on, get outta here!
- Aah!
- Get'em out.
- ~ Ooooh, ooooh ~
- Out. Get'em out!
- ~ Ooooh, ahhhh ~
- [ Laughing, Giggling Continue ]
Shit! We wandered into a fuckin'
time capsule there.
Scumbag!
I'll find where you live and burn
your house down, you piece of shit!
- What happened?
- Oh.
- Ohh.
- One of these days I'll toss a fuckin' bomb in that place.
[ Stifled Giggle ]
~ [ Circus ]
- [ Tires Screech ]
- Oh, wait. You see that?
This is the place, man.
They'll never
fuck with us here.
Where's the ether?
Mescaline's not working.
Oh.
There we go.
Right.
[ Mumbles ]
Yeah. Why not?
[ Groans ]
Yeah.
[ Inhales ]
Mm-hmm.
[ Duke Narrating ]
Ahh. Devil ether.
It makes you behave like the village
drunkard in some early Irish novel.
Total loss of all
basic motor skills.
Blurred vision,
no balance, numb tongue.
The mind recoils in horror...
unable to communicate
with the spinal column...
which is interesting because you can actually
watch yourself behaving in this terrible way...
but you can't control it.
~ [ Continues, Distorted ]
You approach the turnstiles
and know that when you get there...
you have to give the man two dollars
or he won't let you inside...
but when you get there
everything goes wrong.
Some angry Rotarian shoves you and
you think, "What's happening here?"
- You hear yourself mumbling:
- Dogs fucked the Pope. No fault of mine.
~ [ Continues, Distorted ]
Ether is the perfect drug
for Las Vegas.
In this town they love a drunk.
Fresh meat.
- Come on, buddy. Come on.
- Holy-
So they put us through the turnstiles
and turned us loose inside.
- ~ [ Drum roll ]
- [ Announcer ] Ladies and gentlemen...
boys and girls...
- visitors of all ages...
- ~ [ Cymbal Crash ]
- ~ [ Circus ]
- the Bazooko Casino Circus proudly presents...
the Flying Fellinis!
[ Together ]
Ooooh-whoop!
~ [ Continues ]
Oh, my God!
Whoop!
[ Inhales ]
[ Snarling ]
[ Wolverine Snarling ]
~ Mm-hmm ~
[ Snarling Continues ]
Whoa!
Excuse me.
- Get out of my way, you-
- [ Elephant Trumpets ]
A drug person can learn to cope with
things like seeing their dead grandmother...
crawling up their leg
with a knife in her teeth...
but nobody should be asked
to handle this trip.
Bazooko Circus is what the whole hep
world would be doing Saturday night...
if the Nazis
had won the War.
This was the Sixth Reich.
Place your bets!
Everyone's a winner!
Step right up and shoot the pasties off
the nipples of a ten-foot bull dyke...
and win
a cotton candy goat!
[ Hooting, Chittering,
Hissing ]
[ Blows Raspberry ]
Step up to this
fantastic machine!
For just 99 cents your likeness
will appear 200 feet tall...
on a screen
over downtown Las Vegas.
For just 99 cents more you can have a
voice message! Say whatever you want, fella!
Oh, they'll hear you, all right!
You'll be 200 feet tall!
[ Duke Narrating ]
The ether was wearing off.
The acid was long gone.
But the mescaline
was running strong.
Good mescaline
comes on slow.
The first hour's
all waiting...
and then about halfway
through its second hour...
you start cursing the creep who burned
you because nothing's happening.
And then... zang!
I hate to say this-
[ Hiccup ]
but this place is getting to me.
[ Hiccup ]
I think I'm- [ Hiccup ]
getting the fear.
Nonsense. We came here to find
the American Dream.
Now that we're right
in the vortex, you wanna quit?
You must realize, man,
we've found the main nerve.
That's what- [ Hiccup ]
gives me the fear.
- Oh, look!
- [ Carousel Horse Groans ]
There's, uh, two women
fucking a polar bear.
Don't tell me
those things.
Not n- [ Hiccup ]
now, man. [ Hiccup ]
This is my last drink.
How much money can you lend me?
Not much. Why?
- I have to go. [ Hiccup ]
- Go?
- Yeah. Leave the country.
- Oh, no. Calm down.
You'll be straight in a few hours.
Just sit the fuck down.
Don't fuck around, man.
This is serious.
One more hour in this town- [ Hiccup ]
I'll kill somebody.
- [ Hiccup ]
- Okay, I'll lend you some money.
[ Gasps ]
Can we make it?
- I wanna leave fast.
- Okay.
Let's pay this bill,
get up very slowly-
I think it's gonna be
a long walk.
Light, sir?
Do they pay you to s- [ Hiccup ]
screw that bear?
What? What?
- What did he say?
- He's drunk.
You'd better take care
of your friend.
Madam, sir, baby, child,
whatever, can I pay-
Here, take this.
That should be enough.
Hey, come on.
Let's go downstairs and gamble.
[ Grunting, Hiccupping ]
You guys
don't fucking give up.
Where'd he go?
Where did he go?
- When is this thing gonna stop?
- Stop?
- Stop it!
- It won't stop. It's never gonna stop, man.
Don't move.
You'll fall down.
Fuck, he's-
Where did he go- Oh.
Come on. Let go.
Quick, like a bunny.
Hop! Hop!
- Come on. Hop!
- I can't!
Oh, you sniveling,
chicken shit bastard!
All right.
Come on-
Oh, fuck! Ohh!
Come on. You fell, you fell.
Let's go.
[ Muttering ]
Son of a bitch. You pushed me.
- Go away!
- Come on.
All right. Stay here and
go to jail. I'm leaving.
Come on, you fiend!
- Step right over-
- Nothing. I want nothing.
[ Gonzo ]
Did you see that?
Some son of a bitch
just kicked me in the back.
Probably the bartender. Wanted to stomp
you for what you said to the waitress.
- Holy moley! Holy moley!
- Cows are gonna kill me.
Bisexuals
are gonna kill me.
Let's get outta here.
Where's the elevator?
Don't go near the elevator!
That's just what they want us to do.
Trap us in a steel box, take us down
to the basement. Here.
[ Gunshots ]
Don't run, man. They'd like
any excuse to shoot us.
[ Gasps ]
You drive.
I think there's something wrong with me.
[ Groans ]
Mm-mmm.
Wrong door.
- Hmm?
- Wrong door.
[ Duke Narrating ] This is not
a good town for psychedelic drugs.
Extremely menacing vibrations
were all around us.
We finally made it to the room,
but the key wouldn't open the door.
- Those bastards have changed the lock on us, man.
- Already?
They probably searched the room, man.
[ Panting ]
[ Whispers ]
Jesus Christ, we're finished.
Move it!
- Watch out! Watch out!
- Aaah!
- [ Duke ] Whoa!
- Bolt everything!
- Use all the chains!
- ~ [ Humming ]
Mmm. That's better.
That's better. Ah.
Where did this one
come from?
[ Muttering ]
Uh, that's Lacerda's.
Yeah. Yeah.
I thought we might need it.
What for?
So we can go up there and blast him
out of bed with a fire hose, man.
I think you should leave
that poor bastard alone.
- He told me he was gonna
turn in early, so- - I knew it.
- He told me he was gonna
turn in early, so- - I knew it.
He got a hold
of my woman, man!
You mean that, uh, blonde groupie
with the film crew?
Shit. Think he sodomized her?
[ Giggles ]
[ Gonzo ]
That's right. Laugh about it.
He's gluing her eyes shut
right now, man.
[ Mutters ]
You goddamn honkies are all the same.
You goddamn honkies
are all the same!
Jesus God Almighty, man,
where'd you get that big fucker?
[ Groans ]
Room service
sent it up.
I needed something
to cut the limes, man.
Limes?
What limes?
They didn't have any.
They don't grow in the desert.
That dirty
toad bastard.
Should've taken him out
when I had a chance.
[ Roars ]
Now he has her, man!
He got a hold
of my baby, yeah.
[ Duke Narrating ]
I remembered the girl.
We'd had a problem with her
in the elevator a few hours earlier.
My attorney had made
a fool of himself.
- I think you look just like him.
- You think so?
[ Conversation
Continues, Faint ]
[ Coughs ]
You must be a rider.
Huh? Huh?
She's, uh,
speaking to you.
What class are you in?
Class?
What the fuck
do you mean?
- What do you ride?
- [ Coughs ]
See, we're here getting
a little footage on the race for-
[ Chuckles ]
a television series.
- [ Chuckling ]
- I thought maybe, um, we could use you.
Oh, use me?
I ride a-
"Mother of God," I thought.
Here it comes.
I ride the big fuckers.
You know? Big ones.
- The really big fuckers. Yeah.
- [ Both Chuckling ]
Vincent Black Shadow.
We're with the,
uh, factory team.
- Bullshit.
- What?
Bullshit.
Uh-oh.
I think there's some kind of ignorant,
chicken shit- Move over, man.
An ignorant chicken fucker
in this town.
You pink motherfucker.
I can show you better
than I can tell you, ma'am.
Got a light? Hmm?
[ Chuckling ]
No.
You don't trust me,
do you? Huh?
- Put the smile away.
- It's okay. I know these guys.
Keep smiling, jerk-off.
Keep trying me.
- You wanna impress her? Well, impress her with me.
- [ Yelping ]
Oh, fuck.
[ Sighs ]
[ Bell Dings ]
[ Gonzo ]
Whoo!
- Whoo! Whoo!
- No, you goddamn freak! Freak!
- [ Jabbering ]
- Oh, shit!
The police will be
coming after you.
- Gimme the key.
- Shh. Shh.
Gimme the goddamn key!
- ~ For your love ~
- Whoo!
- ~ For your love ~
- ~ I give you everything and more ~
- Oh, no.
- Put the knife away.
- I been walking all day.
Come on. It's in my pocket.
Come on.
~ For your love ~
~ I give you everything
I I give you diamonds, I ~
~ Know the place
that will excite ~
- ~ I'll make you feel you'll need me at night ~
- Goddamn it.
- ~ [ Fades ]
- It's serious now, man.
That girl understood, man.
[ Sighs ]
Whew.
She fell in love
with me, man.
Eye contact, man.
Wait.
Ohh!
I should go up there and castrate
that fucker. I'll take the blame, man.
Let's just leave that
weird fucker alone, man. Come on.
Have you made a deal
with him?
Did you put him on to her?
Huh? Huh?
Huh?
All right, look...
you better put that
goddamn blade away, man.
Get your fuckin' head
straight.
I'm gonna go
get the car washed.
[ Duke Narrating ] One of the things you learn
after years of dealing with drug people...
is that you can
turn your back on a person...
but never turn your back
on a drug...
especially when it's waving
a razor-sharp hunting knife in your eye.
[ Bell Dings ]
- [ Chattering ]
- [ Slot Machines Clicking, Ringing ]
[ Man Shouts ]
Whoa!
[ Duke Narrating ]
What was I doing out here?
What was the meaning
of this trip?
Was I just roaming around
in a drug frenzy of some kind...
or had I really come out here
to Las Vegas to work on a story?
Who are these people,
these faces?
Where do they come from?
They look like caricatures
of used car dealers from Dallas...
and, sweet Jesus, there are a hell of a
lot of them at 4:30 on a Sunday morning...
still humping
the American Dream-
that vision
of the big winner...
somehow emerging from the last-minute,
pre-dawn chaos of a stale Vegas casino.
- Twenty.
- We change a twenty.
Thank you.
- Here we go.
- Okay.
~ Spinning the wheel, Spinning the wheel
Spinning the wheel ~
~ Make me rich
Make me very rich ~
Eee-yo!
- That's ten.
- Oh, you bastard!
- Shit. [ Sighs ]
- Sorry.
[ Duke Narrating ]
No, no. Calm down.
Learn to enjoy losing.
~ [ Rock: Loud ]
~ [ Continues, Louder ]
~ [ Continues:
Loud, Distorted ]
Fuck, man, it's a fuckin'
great deluge in here.
Don't touch that. Leave it alone.
Don't fuck with it, man!
- [ Click ]
- ~ [ Stops ]
Oh, God.
Did you eat all this acid?
That's right.
Music!
You better pray to God
there's some Thorazine in that bag.
- Otherwise, you're in bad fucking trouble.
- Put that tape on!
- What tape?
- Jefferson Airplane. "White Rabbit. "
- I need a rising sound.
- You're doomed.
I'm leaving here
in two hours.
Then they're gonna come beat the mortal
shit out of you right there in that tub.
[ Shrieking ]
All right, I'll do it!
I'll do it. I'll do it. Fuck, man.
All right, I'll do it!
I'll do it. I'll do it. Fuck, man.
Just do me one
last favor, will ya?
Give me two hours.
That's all I ask.
Two hours to sleep
before tomorrow.
- This is fixed.
- ~ [ "White Rabbit" ]
It's gonna be
a very difficult day.
I'll give you
all the time you need.
Electrocution.
We don't want that.
- [ Mutters ] Fuck off.
- [ Fart ]
~ [ Continues ]
[ Groans,
Continues Farting ]
[ Tape ]
~ When logic and proportion ~
- ~ Have fallen ~
- Goddamn it!
~ Sloppy dead ~
~ And the White Knight ~
- ~ Is talking backwards ~
- Let's see.
- ~ And the Red Queen's "Off with her head" ~
- [ Muttering ]
- ~ Remember ~
- [ Muttering ] Oh, God Almighty.
- Help! Help! Help me! Help!
- ~ What the dormouse said ~
- Help!
- Shit! He's killing himself!
[ Shouting Incoherently ]
- ~ Feed your head ~
- Don't touch it! Don't touch it!
- For fuck's sake, man!
- ~ Feed your head ~
[ Shouting Incoherently ]
Back, God-
Back, motherfucker!
[ Shrieking ]
- On a roll, man! I need it again!
- What?
When it comes to that fantastic note...
[ Panting ]
when the rabbit
bites its own head off...
I want you to throw
that fuckin' radio...
into the tub with me.
Fuck! You've gone
completely sideways, man.
That'll blast you right through the
wall. You'll be stone dead in ten seconds.
- Fuck, they'll make me explain things. Shit.
- Bullshit.
Don't fuck with me now, man.
I am Ahab.
[ Groaning ]
Jesus Christ.
[ Sighs ]
All right, you weird fucker!
Sit down! Back in the tub!
I'll plunge this
into your fucking throat.
Don't make me use this, man.
All right, man.
Probably the only solution.
- Let me make sure I've got this all lined up.
- [ Tape Rewinding ]
You want me to, uh...
throw this into the tub when
"White Rabbit" peaks, is that it?
Oh, fuck.
[ Panting ]
I was beginning to think
I was gonna have to go outside...
and get one of
the goddamn maids to do it.
Oh, no. I'll do it.
Shit. What are friends for?
[ Groaning, Howling ]
- ~ I think she'll know ~
- You ready?
- [ Groaning ]
- ~ Where logic ~
- Close your eyes.
- ~ And proportion ~
- Yeah, good boy.
- [ Groaning Continues ]
~ Have fallen
sloppy dead ~
- Rabbit! White Rabbit!
- Quiet, goddamn it! You're wasting my time!
[ Slurring ]
Outta here, man! Get outta here.
~ [ Volume Increases ]
- ~ Remember ~
- Okay, close those peepers. Ten...
- [ Howling ]
- ~ What the dormouse said ~
- nine... hundred and eleven!
- ~ Feed your head ~
Fifty-two!
- ~ Feed your head ~
- Hey! Hey!
Hey!
[ Shrieking ]
[ Shouting ]
[ Retching Loudly ]
- [ Vomiting ]
- I need sleep.
[ Coughing ]
[ Retching Continues ]
[ Loud Roar ]
Holy shit!
Mace! Mace, man.
You want this?
You'd do that,
wouldn't you?
- Well, why not?
- You fucking bastard!
Hell, just a minute ago you were asking
me to kill you. Now you wanna kill me.
What I should do, goddamn it,
is call the fucking police!
Boy, are you upset.
There'd be no point, man,
calling the cops.
There's no choice.
I wouldn't dare go to sleep with you
wandering around with a head full of acid...
wanting to slice me up
with that goddamn knife.
Who said anything
about slicing you up, man?
I just wanted to cut
a little "Z" in your forehead.
[ Wheezing Laughter ]
Get back in the tub.
Eat some reds and try to calm down.
Smoke some grass.
Shoot some fucking smack.
Shit, man, do whatever
you gotta do, but please...
I need some fucking rest,
man. Please. Please.
Get out of here,
you pig fucker!
Up! Up!
Well, I, uh-
Yeah.
[ Panting ]
You need to get to work.
Goddamn, what a bummer.
You scurvy
shyster bastard.
- [ Groaning ]
- I'm a Doctor of Journalism, man.
Go on.
- Don't let me keep you up.
- Now-
Don't let me keep you up.
[ Groans ]
- [ Klaxon Blaring ]
- Get in there and clean your shorts!
Clean your shorts, goddamn it,
like a big boy!
Pig!
The acid had
shifted gears on him.
The next phase would probably be one of those
hellishly intense introspective nightmares.
[ Mutters ]
Must get some peace.
- Four hours or so of catatonic despair.
- [ Gonzo Shouting ]
- Damn drugs.
- Aaaaah!
- Mmm?
- [ Shouting Continues ]
Ignore the nightmare
in the bathroom.
Just another ugly refugee
from the love generation.
My attorney had never been
able to accept the notion...
often espoused
by former drug abusers...
that you can get a lot higher
without drugs than with them.
Neither have I,
for that matter.
~ When the truth is found ~
~ To be lies ~
~ And all the joy ~
~ Within you dies ~
~ Don't you want
somebody to love ~
~ Don't you need
somebody to love ~
~ Wouldn't you love
somebody to love ~
~ You better find
somebody to love ~
~ Love ~
~ [ Continues ]
[ Duke Narrating ] 1965.
The great San Francisco acid wave.
~ When the garden flowers ~
I recall one night in a place
called the Matrix. There I was-
- ~ [ Continues ]
- Mother of God. There I am.
Holy fuck.
Uh, clearly I was a victim
of the drug explosion...
a natural street freak
just eating whatever came by.
[ Voice Extremely Slowed Down ]
Does anybody want some LSD?
I got all the makin's...
right here!
[ Echoing ]
All I need is a place to cook.
I decided to eat only
half of the acid at first...
but I spilled the rest on the sleeve
of my red woolen shirt.
[ Voice Slowed Down, Echoing ]
What's the trouble?
[ Voice Slowed Down, Echoing ]
Well, all this white stuff...
on my sleeve...
is LSD.
[ Duke Narrating ]
With a bit of luck...
his life
was ruined forever...
always thinking that just behind some
narrow door in all his favorite bars...
men in red woolen shirts...
are getting incredible kicks
from things he'll never know.
~ [ Pop: Mid-Tempo ]
Strange memories on
this nervous night in Las Vegas.
Has it been five years? Six?
It seems like a lifetime, the kind
of peak that never comes again.
~ Love is but
a song we're singin' ~
San Francisco
in the middle '60s...
was a very special time and place
to be a part of...
- but no explanation...
- ~ We can make the mountains ring ~
no mix of words
or music or memories...
can touch that sense of knowing
that you were there and alive...
in that corner of time in the world,
whatever it meant.
~ Though the bird
is on the wing ~
~ And you may not
know why ~
There was madness
in any direction...
- ~ Come on, people, now ~
- at any hour.
- ~ Smile on your brothers ~
- You could strike sparks anywhere.
~ Everybody get together ~
- ~ Try to love one another ~
- There was a fantastic universal sense...
that whatever we were doing was right,
that we were winning.
And that, I think,
was the handle.
~ Some may come
and some may go ~
That sense
of inevitable victory...
over the forces
of old and evil.
Not in any mean or military sense-
we didn't need that.
Our energy
would simply prevail.
We had all the momentum.
We were riding the crest
of a high and beautiful wave.
- So now, less than five years later...
- ~ [ Continues ]
you can go up a steep hill
in Las Vegas and look west...
and with the right kind
of eyes...
you can almost see
the high-water mark...
that place where the wave
finally broke...
and rolled back.
- ~ Try to love one another right now ~
- [ Waves Gently Crashing ]
~ [ Electric Piano ]
~ [ Piano Continues,
Rock Band Begins ]
- [ Doorbell Buzzing ]
- ~ Want some whiskey in your water ~
- Room service!
- ~ Some sugar in your tea ~
~ What's all these crazy questions
they're askin' me ~
- Good morning, sir.
- ~ This is the craziest party there could ever be ~
What do you want, man?
What do you want?
- Room service.
- Get out.
- ~ Mama told me not to come ~
- You're in the wrong room. Get the fuck out!
- I've got a gun. It's not mine, really.
- ~ Mama told me not to come ~
- Uh, the- the- the bill.
- What?
- Will you... s-sign for it?
- Yeah, I'll get it. Hurry up.
Don't move, man.
Be very still.
There we go.
Say nothing
to no one, man.
~ Open up the window
Let some air into this room ~
[ Duke Narrating ] The decision
to flee came suddenly. Or maybe not.
- ~ That cigarette you're smokin' 'bout scared me half to death ~
- Maybe I'd planned it all along,
subconsciously waiting
for the right moment.
- ~ Mama told me not to come ~
- The bill was a factor, I think...
- because I had no money to pay for it.
- ~ Mama told me not to come ~
Our room service tabs had been running
somewhere between 29 and 36 dollars per hour...
- ~ That ain't the way to have fun, son ~
- for 48 consecutive hours.
- Incredible.
- ~ That ain't the way to have fun ~
How could it happen?
But by the time I asked this question,
there was no one around to answer it.
That rotten attorney of mine,
Dr. Gonzo, was gone.
He must have sensed trouble.
Hmm? Ohh.
A "Z"?
Panic.
It crept up my spine like
first-rising vibes of an acid frenzy.
- [ Bell Dings ]
- All these horrible realities began to dawn on me.
[ Duke ]
Oh, fuck.
Here I was...
alone in Las Vegas,
completely twisted on drugs.
No cash,
no story for the magazine...
and on top of everything else I had a
gigantic goddamn hotel bill to deal with.
I didn't even know
who'd won the race.
- Maybe nobody.
- [ Arguing ]
How would Horatio Alger
have handled this situation?
Stay calm.
Stay calm.
I'm a relatively
respectable citizen.
- Multiple felon, perhaps, but certainly not dangerous.
- [ Whistles ]
- [ Engine Revs ]
- Taxi!
Luckily I had taken the soap and grapefruit
and other luggage out to the car earlier.
Now-
it was only a matter
of slipping the noose.
Hey! Here, take this.
All right.
- Mr. Duke! Mr. Duke!
- Oh, shit.
- We've been looking for you.
- The game was up. They had me.
Many fine books have been written
in prison, huh?
- Sir?
- What?
Um, this telegram
came for you.
Actually, it's not for you.
It's for somebody named, uh, Thompson.
But it says, "Care of Raoul Duke. "
Do you- Do you-
- Does that mean anything?
- Yes, yes, it means a lot. Thanks.
- Yeah, I checked the register for this man Thompson.
- [ Engine Revs ]
We don't show him, but I figured
he might be part of your team.
- He is. Don't worry. I'll get it to him.
- Yeah.
Um, what confused us
was, uh...
Dr. Gonzo's signature on the telegram from
Los Angeles when we knew he was right here.
Right.
You did the right thing.
Never try to understand a press message.
About half the time, we use codes.
Especially with Dr. Gonzo.
See ya.
- Um, tell me.
- [ Tires Screech ]
When will the doctor
be awake?
- Awake? What do you mean?
- Well, um...
my manager, Mr. Heem,
would like to meet him.
It's nothing unusual, um-
Mr. Heem likes to meet
all of our large accounts...
put'em on a personal basis,
you know?
Just a chat and a handshake.
You understand.
Of course,
but if I were you...
I would leave the doctor alone
until after he's eaten his breakfast...
because he's
a very crude man.
Jesus God!
- No!
- [ Tires Screech ]
But he will be available,
huh, maybe later this morning?
Look, the telegram
is actually all scrambled.
It's actually from Thompson,
not to him.
All right? Now, I've got to go.
I've gotta get to the race.
- B-But there's no hurry. The
race is over. - Not for me.
Well, um-
Let's have lunch!
Righty-o, man.
Righty-o.
- ~ Now, the bricks lay on Grand Street ~
- Jesus.
Bad waves of paranoia.
Madness. Fear and loathing.
Intolerable vibrations
in this place. Get out.
The weasels were closing in.
I could smell the ugly brutes.
Do me one last favor, Lord.
Just give me five more high-speed hours
before You bring the hammer down.
Just let me get rid of this goddamn car
and off this horrible desert.
~ Oh, Mama ~
~ Is this really the end ~
- ~ To be stuck inside of Mobile ~
- Oh, you evil bastard.
- ~ With the Memphis blues again ~
- This is Your work. You better take care of me, Lord.
- If You don't, You're gonna have me on Your hands.
- [ Siren Wailing ]
- Pull over! Pull over!
- Hey!
Good morning. How are you?
All right, man. Doing very well.
Few people understand the psychology
of dealing with a highway traffic cop.
Your normal speeder will panic
and immediately pull over to the side.
This is wrong.
It arouses contempt in the cop heart.
Make the bastard chase you.
He will follow.
But he won't know what to make of your blinker
signal that says you're about to turn right.
This is to let him know you're
pulling off for a proper place to talk.
It'll take him a moment to realize he's
about to make a 180-degree turn, at speed.
It'll take him a moment to realize he's
about to make a 180-degree turn, at speed.
But you will be ready.
Brace for the "G"s.
Fast heel-toe work.
[ Siren Continues ]
[ Siren Stops ]
Hi. How are you?
Just what in the hell
did you think you were doing?
I wanna know.
Let me see your license.
Oh, yeah, of course.
There you are.
Oh, my gosh.
It's me.
May I please have that?
I knew I was fucked.
See you have two cases of beer,
a basket of grapefruit...
stack of T-shirts and towels,
light bulbs.
- You realize what you did when you drive like that?
- Yeah, I know. I'm guilty.
I understand that. I knew it
was a crime. I did it anyway.
Shit, why argue?
I'm a fucking criminal. Look at me.
You have
a strange attitude.
Maybe.
You know, I have a feeling
you need to take a nap.
There's a rest area
just up ahead.
I'd like you to go up there,
pull over and get a few hours' sleep.
That's not gonna help me.
I've been awake for too long. Three or
four nights, maybe. Can't even remember.
I go to sleep now,
I'm dead for 20 hours.
What are you carrying
two cases of soap for, son?
I wanna stay clean.
No.
Here's how it is.
What I put in my book,
as of noon...
is that I apprehended you
for driving too fast.
- I advised you to proceed to the next rest area.
- ~ [ Humming ]
Stop!
I advised you to proceed
to the next rest area-
your stated destination, right?
And take a long nap.
Do I make myself clear?
Well...
how far is Baker?
I was sort of hoping to,
I don't know, stop there for lunch.
It's not my jurisdiction.
City limits end 2.2 miles
beyond the rest area.
Can you make it that far?
I'll try.
I've been wanting to go to Baker for
a long time. Yeah. Heard a lot about it.
Excellent seafood.
You know, I'm thinkin',
a guy with your kind of mind...
ought to try
the land-crab.
- Excellent seafood.
- Land-crab.
All right. Why not?
Thanks for the tip.
Look at me in the eyes.
Everything all right?
May I have a little kiss
before you go?
I'm very lonely here.
~ Oh, Mama ~
~ Can this really
be the end ~
I felt raped.
The pig had done me on all fronts.
And now he was going off to chuckle
about it on the west side of town...
waiting for me
to make a run for L.A.
Why, yes, Officer. Of course
I'll take advantage of that rest area.
And I can't tell you how grateful
I am for this break you wanna give me.
Get a grip, man.
If I boom straight for L.A.,
he'll bust me for sure.
No. This was not the time
for a showdown.
This was Death Valley.
[ Loud Grunt ]
Oh, fuck!
Sweet Jesus, it's him.
Oh, my God!
~ [ Nervous Humming ]
[ Engine Stalling ]
Shit!
Come on, you fucking bastard.
Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God.
I've got to go. I've got to-
~ [ Humming Resumes ]
Well, they've nailed me,
goddamn it.
I'm trapped in some stinking
desert crossroads called Baker.
I don't have much time, man.
The fuckers are closing in.
- They'll hunt me down like a fucking beast.
- [ Gonzo ] You sound paranoid.
I need a fucking lawyer
immediately!
[ Gonzo ] What are you doing in Baker?
Didn't you get my telegram?
What telegram, you worthless bastard?
I'll cripple your ass for this.
You brainless scumbag,
you're supposed to be in Vegas.
I rented a suite
at the Flamingo.
You're supposed to be covering the
National District Attorney's conference.
- I made all the reservations. Everything is arranged.
- [ Bird Cawing ]
Now, what the fuck are you doing out
there in the middle of the desert?
Nothing. Never mind.
It's all a big joke.
I'm actually, uh- I'm poolside
at the Flamingo right now...
talking through a portable phone some
dwarf brought out from the casino.
Yeah, I have total credit here. Don't
come anywhere near this place, you bastard.
Foreigners
aren't welcome here.
Well, this is how
the world works.
All energy flows according
to the whims of the Great Magnet.
What a fool I was
to defy him.
I was going back to Vegas.
I had no choice.
I had to get rid
of the Shark.
Too many people might recognize it,
especially the Vegas police.
Luckily, my credit card
was still technically valid.
Now this
was a superior machine.
Ten grand worth of gimmicks
and high-priced special effects.
The rear windows leapt up with a touch
like frogs in a dynamite pond.
The dashboard was full of esoteric
lights and dials and meters...
that I would never understand.
If the pigs
were gathering in Vegas...
I felt the drug culture
should be represented as well.
And there was a certain bent appeal in
the notion of running a savage burn...
on one Las Vegas hotel...
and then just wheeling across town
and checking into another.
Me and a thousand ranking cops
from all over America.
Why not move confidently
into their midst?
- Welcome to the Flamingo Hotel, sir.
- [ Whimpers ]
- [ Grunts, Clears Throat ]
- Sir?
Yeah, hi. Right. Okay.
~ Let me stay in your arms ~
~ I'm addicted to your charms ~
~ You're gettin' to be
a habit with me ~
~ I used to think your love
was something that I ~
~ Could take ~
- ~ Or leave alone ~
- My arrival was badly timed.
~ But now I couldn't do
without my supply ~
~ I need you for my own ~
~ [ Continues Faintly ]
[ Man ] This here model
is one that we had to use...
when we took on them little peckerheads
down there at Kent State.
This baby here-
I'm a police chief
from Michigan.
Look, fella, I have
explained to you.
I have this postcard which says that
I have a reservation in this hotel.
I'm very sorry, sir,
but you're on the late list.
- So your reservation has been transferred to...
- It's okay.
the... Moonlight Motel...
which is just out
on Paradise Boulevard.
We've already paid
for our goddamn room!
It's actually a very fine place of
lodging, and it's only 16 blocks from here.
It has a pool,
sauna, steam.
You listen to me,
you filthy little faggot!
I want a manager down here,
now, now!
Because I'm sick of listening
to your dog shit!
- [ Continues Yelling ]
- I am... very sorry, sir.
- Get off of me! Get away from me!
- Can I call you a cab?
Sure, and I'll call you
a cocksucker!
[ Duke Narrating ] Of course, I could
hear what the clerk was really saying.
Listen, you fuzzy
little shithead!
I've been fucked around
in my time...
by a fairly good
cross section...
of mean-tempered,
rule-crazy cops...
and now...
it's my turn.
So fuck you, Officer.
I'm in charge.
Hey, listen, I really hate to interrupt,
but I wonder if I could slide on through.
The name is Raoul Duke. I think
my attorney made the reservations.
Duke, Raoul.
- [ Bell Dings ]
- Certainly, sir.
My bags- My bags are out there in
that white Cadillac convertible there.
Maybe somebody could
bring it to the room for me.
Oh, yeah, uh, let me get
a quart of Wild Turkey...
- [ Arguing Continues ]
- two-fifths of Bacardi...
- some ice for the room, and let's see-
- You just calm down!
Shit, let's try some lime chunks.
What do you think?
I say okay.
- You don't worry about a thing.
- Now, calm down.
You don't hesitate
to call me- Sven.
All right, Sven.
- [ Bawling ]
- Thank you very much.
- You- You-
- I know, I know, I know.
It's hideous. You're gonna
be fine, though. You're doing well.
I'll see you later.
Wait. Don't touch it.
- [ Crying ]
- Good night. Pardon me. Bye, Sven.
- [ Loud Bawling ]
- Look what you did! Look what you did!
Goddamn you, we wouldn't stay
in this hotel if you begged us!
~ Magic moments ~
~ When two hearts are caring ~
- ~ Magic moments ~
- [ Door Hinges Creak ]
- ~ Memories we've been sharing ~
- Home, sweet home.
- Whoa. What kind of sick shit-
- [ Yelling ]
Oh, shit!
[ Yells ]
- Shit. What the fuck?
- [ Grunting ]
Stop, stop, stop.
Ow! She's biting my leg off!
You degenerate pig. Please!
- [ Grunting Continues ]
- Can't be helped.
- My fucking leg!
- That's "Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds. "
Lucy, be cool,
goddamn it.
Remember what happened
at the airport, okay? Come on.
No more of that, okay?
That's my client, Lucy.
That's Mr. Duke,
the famous journalist.
He's paying for this suite, Lucy.
He's on our side.
He loves artists.
Lucy paints portraits
of Barbra Streisand.
Yeah. Right?
Um, I drew these from TV.
Really.
[ Gonzo ] She came
all the way down-
- What's the name of that town?
- Montana.
Montana. Just to give
these portraits to Barbra.
We're goin' over to the Americana
tonight to meet her backstage.
[ Duke Narrating ]
I desperately needed peace, rest...
sanctuary.
I hadn't counted on this:
finding my attorney on acid and locked
into some kind of preternatural courtship.
Well...
they must have, uh,
brought the car around by now.
So...
why don't, uh...
ou-yay and... I-ay...
o- gay and, uh,
et-gay the...
uff-stay...
out of the unk-tray.
Absolutely. Yeah.
Let's get the stuff.
We'll be right back, Lucy.
- Give me a kiss? One kiss, one kiss.
- No.
- No. No.
- One kiss. Why not?
Okay.
Don't answer the phone.
God bless.
[ Hinges Creaking ]
[ Sighs ]
Well, what are your plans?
Plans?
- The child in the bedroom.
- Oh, Lucy.
I met her on the plane.
Yeah.
She's a religious freak.
I gave her a cap
before I realized-
Jesus, she's never
even had a drink.
[ Duke ]
Well, it'll probably work out.
We can keep her loaded, and then
peddle her ass at the drug convention.
Yeah, she's perfect
for this gig.
These cops'll go 50 bucks a head to beat
her into submission and then gang-fuck her.
We can set her up in one
of these backstreet motels...
hang pictures of Jesus all over the room,
and then turn these fucking pigs loose on her.
Hell, she's strong, man.
She'll hold her own.
Jesus Christ,
I knew you were sick...
but I never expected to hear
you actually say that kind of stuff.
- You filthy bastard.
- Straight economics, man. This girl's a godsend.
Shit. She could
make us a grand a day.
That's ugly, man.
Stop talking like that.
Well, I figure she can do
about four at a time.
If we keep her full of acid, that's
more like two grand a day, maybe three.
[ Sinister Chuckling ]
Hold on, man.
What if I just jump on you
and beat the dog shit out of you?
Would that make you feel any better,
you filthy bastard?
All right,
listen to me.
In a few hours, she'll probably
be sane enough to work herself...
into some sort of towering Jesus-based
rage at the hazy recollection...
of being seduced by
some kind of cruel Samoan...
who fed her liquor and LSD,
dragged her to a Vegas hotel room...
and then savagely penetrated
every orifice in her little body...
with his throbbing,
uncircumcised member.
- [ Woman Gasps ]
- That's so ugly, man.
- Well, truth hurts.
- That's- Argh!
- Yeah.
- Argh! That's argh!
- Argh!
- Argh?
- Argh!
- Argh.
I wanted to help her, man.
Well, you'll go straight
to the gas chamber for this one.
Even if you manage to beat that,
they'll still send you back to Nevada...
for rape
and consensual sodomy.
No, she's gotta go.
Shit.
It doesn't pay to try to
help somebody these days, huh?
[ Siren Wailing In Distance ]
Let's go.
Yeah. Americana Hotel?
I need a reservation.
For my... niece.
Look, I want her treated very gently.
She's an artist and-
Fuck off. She might seem
a trifle high-strung.
She's doing her masters thesis
on, uh...
well, Barbra Streisand.
- It's time to meet Barbra.
- Last name?
I'd rather not say. My brother's
in politics. Yeah, you understand.
I felt like a Nazi,
but it had to be done.
- [ Clapping ]
- Yeah, yeah, righto. Okay, yeah. Bye.
~ Yummy, yummy, yummy
I've got love in my tummy ~
- ~ And I feel like loving you ~
- [ Horn Honking ]
~ Love is such a sweet thing
Good enough to eat ~
~ And it's just
what I'm gonna do ~
[ Duke Narrating ] Lucy was a potentially
fatal millstone on both our necks.
- Hurry the fuck up!
- There was absolutely no choice...
- but to cut her adrift...
- Jesus Christ. Take your time!
and hope her memory
was fucked.
Here's an extra ten bucks.
Make sure she gets there safely.
~ [ Impatient Humming ]
- [ Gasps ]
- [ Sighs ] That's that.
Hey, man, take off slowly.
Don't attract attention.
- ~ Yummy, yummy, yummy I've got love in my tummy ~
- ~ [ Humming ]
Let's find a good seafood restaurant
and eat some red salmon.
I feel a powerful lust
for red salmon.
[ Retching ]
- [ Grunts ]
- Oh, no, man. We're gonna be late.
- We gotta go.
- [ Panting ]
Goddamn mescaline.
Why the fuck can't they
make it a little less pure?
[ Man ]
I welcome you...
to the third National
D.A.'s Convention...
on Narcotics
and Dangerous Drugs.
And now,
without further ado...
the man who will define this cancer
eating at the heart of America...
Dr. L. Ron Bumquist.
I saw these bastards in Easy Rider,
but I didn't believe they were real.
Not like this, man,
not hundreds of them.
They're actually pretty nice people
once you get to know them.
Know them? I know these people
in my goddamn blood.
Don't say that word around here.
You'll get them excited.
- You're right.
- The most efficient way for us to do this...
is for each one of us...
to try and attempt...
to imagine
what it is like inside...
- of the possessed mind of the addict.
- Hmm?
For example...
a dope fiend...
refers to the reefer butt...
as a "roach"...
because...
it resembles a cockroach.
What the fuck are these people
talking about?
You've got to be crazy on acid to think
a joint looks like a goddamn cockroach.
You will notice
that I have distinguished...
four- four distinct
states of being...
in the cannabis
or marijuana society.
They are cool, groovy...
hip and square.
Seldom, if ever-
- Too crazy, man. Too crazy.
- [ Grunting ]
We should get the hell out.
What a fucking nightmare.
If he figures out
what is happening...
then he can rise
one notch...
and become hip.
And then if he can
convince himself...
to approve
of what is happening...
then he becomes groovy.
Groovy.
And then, after that,
he can actually raise himself...
to the rank of cool.
He can become one
of those...
cool guys.
[ Man ]
Dr. Bumquist.
You think the anthropologist Margaret
Mead's strange behavior of late...
could be explained
by a private marijuana addiction?
Good question.
- [ Murmuring ]
- I'm not really sure I can answer that.
But what I can tell you, sir,
is if Margaret Mead...
at her age...
smoked grass...
she'd have one hell
of a trip.
[ Hysterical Laughing ]
One more layer of deviance
to the woman.
This is fuckin' bullshit.
I'll be out
in the casino.
[ Hysterical Laughing
Continues ]
Shut up, man.
Go to hell!
[ Giggling ]
Thank you very much. Thank you.
- Thank you. Thank you for having me.
- Projector, please.
- Excuse me.
- All right.
~ [ Dramatic ]
~ [ Continues ]
[ Male Narrator ]
Know your dope fiend.
Your life may depend on it.
You will not be able to see his eyes,
because of Tea-Shades...
but his knuckles will be white
from inner tension.
And his pants will be
crusted with semen...
from constantly jacking off
when he can't find a rape victim.
He will stagger and babble
when questioned.
- He will not respect your badge.
- [ Woman Moaning ]
The dope fiend fears nothing.
He will attack for no reason,
with any weapon at his command...
- including yours.
- Excuse me.
- Beware: any officer apprehending a suspected marijuana addict...
- Pardon me.
- should use all necessary force immediately.
- Sorry. Pardon me.
One stitch in time on him
will usually save nine...
[ Echoing ]
on you-
Oh, God. Oh, God.
Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.
- Oh, God. Oh, God.
- [ Phone Ringing ]
[ Gonzo Moaning ]
Yeah?
Yes, Mr. Duke, hello.
You have one message.
- Call Lucy...
- [ Retching Sounds ]
- at the Americana Hotel, room 1600.
- Oh, fuck.
- [ Dial Tone ]
- Hello?
- Lucy called.
- [ Retching Continues ]
- [ Toilet Flushes ]
- What?
- Lucy called.
- What?
- Lucy called, man.
- [ Phone Ringing ]
- [ Ringing Continues ]
- [ Metal Gate Slams ]
Those two men in the dock,
they gave me the LSD.
They took me
to the hotel.
I don't know what they
done to me, but I remember...
it was horrible.
- [ Duke Groans ]
- They gave you what?
LSD.
[ Judge ]
Castration!
Double castration!
- Where's my.357?
- Who the fuck knows, man?
- [ Car Horn Honking ]
- You can't leave me alone in this snake pit.
You bastard, what did you do
with my.357?
- This room is in my name.
- Well, tough titty.
Okay, goddamn it!
You're right.
She's my problem. I'll call her,
I'll get her off our backs.
- It's gone too fucking far.
- No, I'll take care of the situation.
- Relax.
- Relax!
Let me handle this.
[ Siren Wailing
In Distance ]
- Where are my shoes?
- The Americana Hotel.
- What did you do with my goddamn shoes?
- Room 1600, please.
As your attorney, I advise you to take a
hit out of the little brown bottle...
in my shaving kit.
You won't need much.
Just a... tiny taste.
Let's have it.
Ah, there it is.
- What is this shit?
- That stuff...
makes pure mescaline
seem like ginger beer, man.
- Adrenochrome.
- Adrenochrome? Hmm.
- [ Phone Rings ]
- [ Gasps ]
[ Rings ]
[ Quietly ]
Hello.
- Hi, Lucy. God bless.
- Hmm?
Yeah, it's me.
Hell, no, I taught the bastard
a lesson he'll never forget.
What? No, not dead.
But he won't be bothering
anybody for a while.
Yeah, I left him out there.
I stomped him.
I pulled all his teeth out.
[ Duke Narrating ]
I remember thinking, Jesus...
what a terrible thing to lay
on somebody with a head full of acid.
But we have a problem.
That bastard cashed a bad check
downstairs and gave you as a reference.
They'll be looking
for both of you.
Yeah, I know, Lucy, but you
can't judge a book by its cover.
Some people are
just basically rotten.
Anyway, the last thing in the world
you wanna do is call this hotel again.
- They'll trace the call, put you behind bars.
- [ Babbling ]
No, I'm moving
to the Tropicana right away.
Hmm.
[ Babbling ]
I'll use a different name.
I'll let you know what it is.
[ Gasps ]
I gotta get off.
Probably have
this phone tapped, baby.
- Yeah, it was horrible, but it's all over now.
- [ Banging ]
Oh, my God.
There's someone at the door.
- [ Squealing ]
- There's someone at the door.
Christ! Hey!
No! I'm innocent!
It was Duke!
It was Duke!
Lucy! Lucy!
[ Yelling ]
I love you! I love you!
[ Screaming ]
Don't put that thing on me.
Aaaah! Aaaah!
[ Screaming Continues,
Echoing ]
Whoo. Oh.
Well-
[ Sighs ]
That's that.
- [ Gurgling ]
- That's the last we should be hearing from Lucy, man.
[ Exhales ]
She's probably stuffing herself
down the incinerator about now.
You know what we need?
We need some opium.
[ Gurgling Continues ]
I remember
slumping on the bed.
His performance
had given me a bad jolt.
For a moment,
I thought his mind had snapped...
that he actually believed he was being
attacked by invisible enemies.
But the room was quiet again.
Where'd you get this?
Never mind.
It's absolutely pure.
What kind of monster client
have you hooked up with this time?
Satanism freak.
I think there's only
one source for this stuff-
the, uh, adrenaline gland...
from a living human body.
- I know. The guy didn't have any cash to pay me.
- ~ [ Dramatic ]
He offered me human blood, said it would
take me higher than I'd ever been in my life.
- I thought he was kidding...
- Oh.
so I told him I'd just as soon have
an ounce or so of pure adrenochrome...
or maybe just a fresh
adrenaline gland...
to chew on.
I could already feel
the stuff working on me.
The first wave felt like a combination
of mescaline and methedrine.
Maybe I should take a swim,
I thought.
Yes, sir.
They nailed this guy
for child molesting.
He swore he didn't do it.
"Why should I fuck with children?"
he said. "They're too small. "
- [ Whining Sound ]
- Christ, what could I say?
Even a goddamn werewolf
is entitled to legal counsel.
I didn't dare
to turn the creep down.
He might have picked up a letter opener
and gone after my...
pineal gland.
- You know?
- Yeah.
- Crazy.
- Why not?
Shit. We should
get some of that.
Just... eat a big handful
and see what happens.
Some of what?
[ Grunting, Sniffs ]
Extract of pineal.
Sure, that's a good idea.
One whiff of that stuff will turn you
into something out of a goddamn...
medical encyclopedia, man.
Beautiful
fucking tits.
Man, your head would
swell up like a watermelon.
- You'd gain about a hundred pounds in two hours.
- Right!
Grow claws,
bleeding warts.
Yes.
And then you'd notice
about six huge, hairy tits...
swelling up on your back.
Fantastic!
You'd go blind.
Your body would turn to wax.
They'd have to put you
in a wheelbarrow.
And when you scream for help...
you'll sound
like a raccoon.
[ Whimpering ]
Man, I'll try
just about anything...
but I'd never in hell
touch a pineal gland.
Finish the fucking story, man!
What happened?
What about the glands?
Jesus, that stuff got right
on top of you, didn't it?
Look at your face.
You're about to explode.
Maybe you could just...
[ Groans ]
shove me into the pool.
Man, if I put you in the pool right now,
you'll sink like a goddamn stone.
You took too much, man.
You took too much. Too much.
[ Gurgling ]
Don't try and fight it.
You'll get brain bubbles,
strokes, aneurysms.
You'll just wither up
and die.
- [ Duke Muttering ]
- [ Man ] They continue killing innocent people!
[ Echoing ] Allowing the hopes for peace
and freedom of millions of people...
to be suffocated.
So tonight, we do.
The great silent majority.
Sacrifice. Sacrifice.
[ Echoing ] Sacrifice.
Sacrifice. Sacrifice. Sacrifice.
Sacrifice. Sacrifice.
Sacrifice. Sacrifice.
- [ Continues Echoing ]
- [ Moaning ]
~ [ Orchestral ]
[ Woman ] ~ I feel the cottonwood
whispering above ~
~ Tammy, Tammy ~
- ~ Tammy's in love ~
- [ Moaning ]
~ [ Continues ]
What kind of rat-bastard psychotic would
play that song right now, at this moment?
~ Tammy, Tammy ~
When I came to...
the general back-alley ambience
of the suite was so rotten...
- so incredibly foul.
- ~ [ Continues ]
How long had I
been lying there?
All these signs of violence.
- What had happened?
- [ Insect Buzzing ]
There was evidence in this room
of excessive consumption...
of almost every type of drug
known to civilized man since 1544 A.D.
[ Coughs, Groans ]
Oh, ah, Debbie.
Thank God.
Oh, Debbie. Hmm? Look.
What kind of addict would need all these
coconut husks and crushed honeydew rinds?
Would the presence of junkies account
for all these uneaten French fries?
These puddles of glazed ketchup
on the bureau?
Maybe so...
but then why all this booze...
and these crude pornographic
photos smeared with mustard...
that had dried
to a hard, yellow crust?
These were not the hoof prints
of your normal God-fearing junkie.
It was too savage,
too aggressive.
- Put your hands where I can see them.
- What? What?
Jesus God, man. Huh?
Put your hands where I can see them.
Put your hands where I can see them!
[ Groans ]
Grim memories
and bad flashbacks.
Get a grip.
Maintain.
How many nights and weird mornings
had this shit been going on?
[ Urinating ]
- Something ugly had happened. I was sure of it.
- [ Retching ]
Who is that? Oh.
Shit, that's me.
- [ Muttering ]
- [ Woman Screams ]
- Help me! [ Shouting In Spanish ]
- What the fuck?
- [ Gonzo Yelling ]
- Oh, shit.
[ Woman Yelling ]
- You're under arrest!
- She must have used a pass key.
I was polishing my shoes in the closet when
I noticed her sneaking in, so I took her.
- What made you do it? Who paid you off?
- Nobody! I'm the maid!
- You're just as much a part of it as they are.
- Part of what?
The goddamn dope ring. You must
know what's going on in this hotel.
Why do you think
we're here?
I know you're the cops, but I thought
you were just here for the convention.
I swear. All I wanted to do
was clean up the room.
- I don't know anything about no dope.
- Come on, baby.
Don't try to tell us you never heard
of the Grange Gorman.
I swear to Jesus
I never heard of that stuff.
Maybe she's telling the truth.
Maybe she's not part of it.
I swear I'm not.
I swear.
In that case,
maybe she can help.
Oh, yes, I'll help you
all you want.
- I hate dope.
- So do we.
I think we should put her on the
payroll, see what she comes up with.
- You think you can handle it?
- What?
One phone call every day.
Don't worry if it doesn't add up.
That's our problem.
Y- You'd pay me for that?
You're damn right
we would.
But the first time that you say anything
about this to anybody...
you will go straight to prison
for the rest of your life.
- What's your name?
- Alice.
Prove it!
- Okay.
- Just ring Linen Service and ask for Alice.
All right, Alice.
You'll be contacted
by Inspector Rock, Arthur Rock.
He'll be posing as a politician, but
you'll have no problem recognizing him.
That's right, Inspector Rock
will pay you in cash...
- $1,000 on the ninth of every month.
- Oh, Lord!
I'd do just about
anything for that.
- You and a lot of other people.
- Come here.
The password is:
"One hand washes the other. "
The minute you hear that,
you say, "I fear nothing. "
- Say it.
- I fear nothing.
- Say it again!
- I fear nothing!
Get the fuck out of here.
Oh, yeah, listen.
Nice meeting you.
Don't bother
to make up the room.
Just leave a pile of towels and soap
outside the door exactly at midnight.
That way we won't have to risk another
one of these little incidents, will we?
- Whatever you say, gentlemen.
- Thank God for decent people.
- [ Duke On Tape ] Say it again!
- [ Maid ] I fear nothing!
Terrible gibberish. Splintered
memories looming up out of the time fog.
- [ Tape Rewinding ]
- Just press play.
[ Duke On Tape ]
This is it, the American Dream.
We're sitting
on the main nerve right now.
Yeah, don't get me started.
The owner always wanted to run away and
join the circus when he was a kid.
Now the son of a bitch
owns the circus.
Ah, man,
a real license to steal.
Oh, yeah. The American Dream
come true, man.
Pure Horatio Alger.
Yeah. Welcome
to the happy place.
[ Grunting ]
Listen, let's get down
to brass tacks here.
How much for the ape?
[ Laughing ]
How much you got?
How much do you think you'd take for the
ape? Just wait here. I'll be back.
- Madness. It made no sense at all.
- [ Tape Rewinding ]
I desperately
needed the facts.
[ Duke Yelling
Incoherently ]
- ~ [ Hard Rock On Tape ]
- What the fuck is going on?
Where's the ape, man?
Where's the ape?
Forget about it.
He attacked an old man.
Bit off the head of the bartender,
then the cops came and took him away.
- [ Yells ]
- [ Man ] Is that your car?
[ Shouting ]
- Somebody stop them!
- You poor fools don't understand.
This car is property of the World Bank.
That money goes to lately.
You can't put on a circus
without a tent.
- The top is completely jammed.
- You're right.
There's something wrong
with the motor.
All right,
who has the story?
- Where are you, you fucking monkey?
- You can't do that!
You people voted
for Hubert Humphrey.
And you killed Jesus.
There was every reason to believe
that we'd been heading for trouble...
that we'd pushed our luck
a bit too far.
Oh, gosh! God.
Right. Uh-
The possibility...
of physical
and mental collapse...
is now very real.
No sympathy for the devil.
Keep that in mind.
Uh, buy the ticket...
uh, take the ride.
[ Weeping ]
Hey, there. You folks want
to buy some heroin?
[ Crying Continues ]
[ Crying ]
Hey, honkies! Goddamn it!
Pull ahead,
will you?
I want to sell you
some pure fucking scag!
Cheap! The real stuff.
I just got back
from Vietnam.
[ Crying ]
Scag.
I want to sell you
some pure fucking scag.
Shit! Fuck!
Now hear me, you bastard!
Pull over! I'll kill you!
- Pull over! Come on!
- [ Tape Audio: Fast Forward ]
Oh, shit. Oh, oh.
~ [ Slow Jazz-Pop:
Woman Singing ]
Okay.
Let's see here.
~ [ Continues ]
The mentality of Las Vegas
is so grossly atavistic...
that a really massive crime
often slips by unrecognized.
North Vegas is where you go when you've
fucked up once too often on the strip...
- [ Shouts ] - and when you're not even
welcome in the cut-rate downtown places.
The North Star Coffee Lounge seemed like
a fairly safe haven from our storms.
No hassles, no talk.
Just a place to rest
and regroup.
I wasn't even hungry.
There was nothing in the atmosphere of
the North Star to put me on my guard.
[ Banging On Plate ]
Two glasses of ice water
with ice.
Two glasses of ice water
with ice.
Two.
She looked line a burnt-out
caricature of Jane Russell.
She was definitely
in charge here.
He did it very casually...
but I knew that our peace
was about to be shattered.
What was that?
What is this?
- It's a napkin.
- Don't give me that bullshit.
I know what that means,
you fat goddamn pimp bastard!
That's the name of a horse
I used to own, ma'am.
- What's wrong with you?
- [ Narrating ] The question mark was emphasized.
You listen to me,
you son of a bitch.
I gotta take a lot of shit in this place,
but I don't have to take it off no spic pimp!
Anybody that knows anything
knows that.
- Go on! Pay your check and get out of here!
- [ Gasps ]
You want me to call the cops?
I'll call the fuck-
[ Duke ]
Oh, shit.
[ Duke ]
Fuck.
Want me to call the cops?
[ Coughs ]
How much is that
lemon meringue pie?
Her eyes were turgid with fear,
but her brain was functioning...
- on some basic motor survival level.
- Thirty-five cents.
- How much is that lemon meringue pie?
- Thirty-five cents.
Whoo! What a waste of talent.
No, honey,
I mean the whole pie.
The whole pie.
- Hmm?
- [ Gasps ]
What, three?
Three? Four?
Five? Hmm?
Five.
I'll be in the car.
[ Quiet Sob ]
[ Gasps ]
[ Engine Starts ]
The sight of the blade
had triggered bad memories.
The glazed look in her eyes
said her throat had been cut.
- She was still in the grip of paralysis when we left.
- [ Sobbing ]
[ Engine Revs ]
[ Tires Screeching ]
It was all over now.
We'd abused every rule
that Vegas lived by.
Threatening the locals, abusing
the tourists, terrifying the help.
The only chance now,
I felt...
was the possibility that
we'd gone to such excess...
that nobody in the position to bring
the hammer down on us...
could possibly believe it.
Fifteen minutes to get
my attorney to the airport...
but we'll make it.
Christ!
No! Oh, fuck!
- Fuck.
- Whoa, shit! Whoa, shit!
Oh, God. Oh, God.
You son of a bitch!
Oh, God.
- [ Gonzo ] You're going the wrong way.
- [ Duke ] The next left.
Go! Fuck!
Take a right here.
Take a right here.
[ Gonzo ]
Goddamn it. We're lost.
What are we doing out here
on this godforsaken road?
The airport's over there.
Goddamn it!
It's over there.
- I've never missed a plane yet.
- [ Tires Screeching ]
[ Horn Honks ]
[ Grunting ]
Hold on!
All right. I'm gonna drop you
right next to the plane.
Fuck you. I'm gonna have to take
the blame. They'll crucify me.
- Right here, right here.
- Ridiculous, man.
Just say you were hitchhiking
to the airport, and I picked you up.
- You bastard.
- Get out.
Hey, hey!
Hey, listen.
Don't take any guff
from these swine.
If you have any trouble,
remember:
you can always send a telegram
to the right people.
Yeah, explaining my position. Some
asshole wrote a poem about that once.
Probably good advice,
if you have shit for brains.
[ Wheezing Laugh ]
[ Coughing ]
There he goes...
one of God's own prototypes.
A high-powered mutant of some kind never
even considered for mass production.
- Too weird to live, and too rare to die.
- Ugh!
~ There you stood on
the edge of your feather ~
~ Expecting to fly ~
We're all wired
into a survival trip now.
No more of the speed
that fueled the '60s.
That was the fatal flaw
in Tim Leary's trip.
He crashed around America,
selling "consciousness expansion"...
without ever giving a thought to the grim
meat-hook realities that were lying in wait...
for all those people
who took him seriously.
All those pathetically eager
acid freaks...
who thought they could buy peace and
understanding for three bucks a hit.
But their loss
and failure...
is ours too.
What Leary took down with him was the
central illusion of a whole lifestyle...
that he helped create.
A generation
of permanent cripples...
failed seekers...
who never understood the essential
old-mystic fallacy of the acid culture:
the desperate assumption
that somebody...
or at least some force...
is tending the light
at the end of the tunnel.
There was only one road
back to L.A.
U.S. Interstate 15.
Just a flat out high-speed burn
through Baker and Barstow and Berdoo.
Then onto the Hollywood Freeway,
straight into frantic oblivion...
safety, obscurity.
Just another freak...
in the freak kingdom.