Today is a good day to die.
- What's happening?
- It's crack! Get some help.
So many crack-heads,
we don't have time for anybody else.
- What have we got?
- Some kind of hemorrhage.
- Blood pressure?
- 90 over 60 and dropping.
- Any vaginal bleeding?
- What's he saying?
- No money. Probably a street abortion.
- It's probably her uterine artery.
- Come on! We gotta open her up.
- The O.R.'s are full. Maybe 10 minutes.
That's too late. Get her under.
- Who will do the surgery?
- I am.
- You can't!
- Just do it!
- You're going to get us all fired.
- Get him out of here!
Fifteen years on the job,
and you'll get me canned in one day.
- You're crazy!
- Here we go.
How we doing?
Forceps!
Where is it? Clamp!
- Get it, babe.
- You got it.
All right, I got her!
- Dave, get out of here. Now!
- I tried to stop him.
Labraccio! What the hell
do you think you're doing?
Randall Steckle,
Diary of a Surgeon.
I'm not a surgeon yet.
Randall Steckle,
Diary of a Surgeon To Be.
Wimpy. Randall Steckle,
Making of a D...
Randall Steckle, Forging of a Surgeon.
No. Pretentious.
Randall Steckle, Genesis?
Randall Steckle,
Genesis of a Young Surgeon.
Brilliant!
Morning.
Nice work.
Keep it up.
Suddenly, even though
I was in a coma...
Suddenly, even though
I was in a coma...
I saw myself...
like from above, looking down.
Ralph, my husband,
was crying.
And the doctor was saying
I was dying.
And I saw myself in the bed
and everything.
And I started to float
out into the hall...
and then into this tunnel...
toward this light.
And it was the most beautiful light
I ever saw.
And I heard this voice.
And it was the most beautiful voice
I ever heard.
And it said...
"I'm going to take your baby...
but you are going back."
And I woke up,
and there was Ralph...
and the doctor.
I was legally dead...
for four and a half minutes.
But I didn't see no tunnel...
and I didn't see no light.
I did.
And it was so beautiful!
I was in this garden.
And this tunnel and light...
and this guide...
and a chariot and music.
Terry, I think they better
get you off medication.
Thanks.
- What's up?
- Good morning.
- There's trouble in ER. Watch your ass.
- Thanks.
Why are you always asking the patients
about death?
I'll be late for class.
Thanks, Edna.
The spoils of arthritis.
Some rather resilient
inflammatory tissue here.
Trying to sever...
Come on, damn it.
We are now beneath the transverse arch
of the foot...
the cuneiforms,
the metatarsals...
Brilliant, Dr. Steckle.
Be sure to bring all that talent
with you tonight, okay?
Nelson, about tonight.
Because I like you as much as I do,
I have to decline on moral grounds.
Isn't there enough atrocity in the world
without your own horror?
Horror?
It's ignorance we fear.
Since when did truth and knowledge
become a horror?
Especially to a scientist
and a genius like yourself.
Good morning, Manus.
How you doing?
Fine.
I've been meaning to ask,
are you dating anyone?
- Identify.
- Costodiaphragmatic recess.
Is it offensive
if I make conversation?
Sometimes it's nice to open up.
Like Lenny here.
He's open.
- Identify.
- Pylorus.
I've heard all the rumors
and nicknames about you, Rachel.
I'm sure you're a very warm woman.
Not the least bit frigid or repressed.
- Identify.
- Your brains.
Good.
Want to come to my place
where we can do more serious thinking?
Excuse me, Dr. Hurley.
I need a word with Dr. Manus.
Sure.
I said no.
I've already got Steckle and Hurley,
two of the top GPA's in the school.
All you need to do is handle
the injections and the IV.
Forget it. I have no interest
in watching you kill yourself.
I think you do.
Good morning, class.
Today's exam will be scaled.
Three A's will be given,
five B's, ten C's...
and the remaining four
will get D's and F's.
Once again, as in life...
you are not in competition with me,
yourself or this exam...
but with each other.
Piece of cake.
There are others here who would like
to make a name for themselves off this.
Seems a shame that the people
with the ability don't have the nerve.
We'll be there.
Speak for yourself, Joseph.
It'll be dramatic.
You'll cry, faint, puke at best.
But then what?
Frankly, I don't think
you have the balls.
You just bring the equipment.
I'll bring my balls.
Did you hear about Labraccio?
It's a four-month suspension.
It won't even affect your scholarship.
Forget it!
I'm outta here.
You're the best student
this school's ever had.
They don't let a guy like you walk away
from medicine. Besides, you were wrong.
Goddamn it, she was dying!
I saved her life.
What would you have done?
Why take it personally?
Of course they'll make you an example.
They have to protect their insurance.
They'll ask you back next term.
Doesn't matter. Given
the same situation, I would do it again.
I know.
That's why I need you there tonight.
There are a few people I would like
to kill, but you are not one of them.
I don't want to die.
I want to come back
with the answers to death and life.
I can get there with the others.
But I need you.
I need you to bring me back.
Please.
I'm sorry. I can't do that.
Great. Why don't you just walk away?
Go climb a mountain.
I don't understand you. You burned
your career today on a stranger.
Now you're turning your back
on a friend.
I'm real sorry about
what happened today. I really am.
What are my chances of making it back
without you?
So don't do it.
What if it works?
Hi.
I don't want to be buried on Saturday.
It costs $150 more
to be buried on Saturday.
Mrs. Amsler,
you're doing much better.
Leave a message after the beep.
Dr. Hurley, I know you're home.
Don't be late.
Don't forget the camera.
What camera?
The bed.
Thank God he called a specialist.
No lectures.
Why did I expect that after
you got engaged you might grow up?
Did it dawn on you
I'm trying to work things out...
recording adventures
before a life of monogamy?
It never dawned on me.
But the words "pussy marauder"
do pop into mind occasionally.
What the hell are we doing here?
This is good-bye med school,
good-bye career.
Chill out. $10 says he doesn't do it.
Shits his drawers and we're out of here.
Not those lights!
Security will come running.
Set up over the grate.
I got the boiler going.
- You really gonna do this?
- Just humor the man.
Take me down with nitrous, sodium
pentathol and a refrigerated blanket.
I've got chilled D5W in the cooler.
When my body temperature hits 86 degrees
you'll hit me with 200 joules.
The electric current will stop my heart.
When the heart is dead...
take the mask off.
Where's Manus?
Shut the door.
I'm going to draw 20cc's.
You handle the injections.
When the EEG flatlines and
the brain is dead, I'll be exploring.
Give me 30 seconds.
Put the blanket on to warm.
Take me up to 93 degrees slowly.
Inject 1cc of adrenaline.
At one minute, Joe,
come in with the defibs...
and bring me back to life.
With brain damage.
Resembling in many ways
a Cabbage Patch doll.
Not with a body temperature
of 86 degrees.
Dr. Manus,
will you handle the injections?
Wait a minute. Quite simply,
why are you doing this?
To see if there's anything out there
beyond death.
Philosophy failed.
Religion failed.
Now it's up to the physical sciences.
I think mankind deserves to know.
You're doing this for mankind?
This letter absolves you
of any responsibility just in case.
This isn't for mankind.
This is for Nelson.
Why do I see you on 60 Minutes...
sandwiched between Andy Rooney
and a commercial?
Tonight, a young medical student who
dared to experience death and come back.
- Fame is inevitable.
- That's the wrong reason.
It's the right idea.
Dr. Hurley, electrodes.
Come on, Joe.
Don't you want to be
on 60 minutes?
Rachel, how about a little nitrous?
At least I get to go out
with a laugh.
Get the blanket.
We're all professionals.
I'm sure this will go smoothly.
If you die, can I have your apartment?
It's a joke. It's a joke!
One minute.
Don't be late.
Start filming.
We'll have a complete record
of the experiment.
Promise me you'll go through with this.
One kiss good-bye?
I'll see you soon.
This letter does not mean shit.
Please, let him sleep it off.
He'll have a wet dream
and think he went to heaven.
- Good idea. Good night, Nelson.
- Now I know why I'm here.
I've expressed myself clearly
for the record. Good night.
Steckle's right.
Are you willing to risk everything?
Med school, your future
for Nelson's fame?
- Someone's coming.
- Oh, shit!
- Is he dead?
- He's only sleeping.
Talk some sense into these people.
- I'll do it.
- What?
- You taking over?
- I've got nothing to lose.
- Just his life!
- I can get him back.
Just stop his heart.
One minute, bring him right back.
Don't think I couldn't have.
Clear.
What are you doing?
- Systole.
- You are killing him.
It's called murder.
No wonder you got tossed.
This is not the shit I want
on my transcript.
Please, don't.
Don't do any more.
I did not come to medical school...
to murder my classmates,
no matter how deranged they might be.
Flatline.
They're getting smaller.
He's dying.
Brain death.
Now it's real.
Start filming.
Let me defib him.
He's dead. Isn't that enough?
Let me try to bring him back.
Just watch the door.
Excuse me. I don't want to ruin
anybody's evening...
but are we in a room
with a dead man?
- Oh, my God!
- One minute to go.
Start filming.
- Thirty seconds to go.
- Let's heat him up.
Twenty seconds at 89, 90.
Standing by with sodium bicarb and Eppy.
I'm charging the paddles.
Charged.
Monitor the EKG.
- Body temp 93 degrees.
- Here we go. Clear.
- What have we got?
- Not a goddamn thing!
Up me to 300.
Charge.
Clear!
Begin CPR.
- 2-1,000.
- Bicarb and Eppy in.
Bag him. 4-1,000. 5-1,000.
Breathe.
- Look. Not a goddamn thing!
- 5-1,000. Breathe!
- 98 degrees.
- Hit him again.
Nothing.
Got him!
- 02 up. Help me.
- More Eppy.
In!
REM.
We got REM.
Nelson, can you hear us?
Welcome back.
Nelson, you crazy motherfucker!
You did it!
Jesus Christ!
That's some bedside manner.
You're gonna make one hell of a doctor.
Suck me.
Can you recall a specific emotion...
or sensation, heat or cold,
anything like that?
You can't break it down into specifics.
They say you see a tunnel
with a light at the end.
No. But there is something out there.
It's comforting.
- Can you imagine how big this is?
- You walked on the moon, buddy!
He could use some air.
You guys could get him some fluids.
- Thanks for saving my life.
- It was so much fun.
Let's get that blood pressure going.
Are you all right, wise one?
I feel like a highly-tuned instrument.
Can you hear the traffic
on the Lakeshore?
Underneath that there's a hum.
It's the street lights.
All right.
Even fainter,
I can hear a dragging sound.
It's getting louder.
I not only hear it,
I can feel it.
Well, your prognosis is excellent.
You'll look great on 60 Minutes.
It's bigger than that.
By the time you're through with it,
I'm sure it will be.
You're not buying any of this,
are you?
You forgot.
I'm an atheist.
- You all right for a few minutes?
- Yeah.
- How's he doing?
- Physically he's stable.
He's talking like Lazarus
back from the dead.
That's what we did.
We brought him back from the dead.
- What we did was get lucky.
- I would like to go next.
- Forget it.
- Me, too. Seriously.
- Why shouldn't we all get famous?
- That's not what this is about.
You'll be famous.
They'll build monuments to you.
Little stones about this high.
"Rest in peace."
Like it or not,
I'm going next.
I'm willing to go
- 1:30.
- Are you two crazy?
Or are you so tragically competitive
that you'd bid with your lives?
That's it.
Not a bad price to pay
for fame and glory.
Die to be a hero if you want,
but don't die to be a celebrity.
Champ?
- Someone should stay with him tonight.
- I have class in three hours.
I will.
You okay?
I'd like to go home.
Are you okay?
You were hyperventilating.
Your blood pressure will rise
in the next 14 hours.
Cardiovascular vessels will constrict,
increasing your blood supply.
God, you're beautiful.
Get some rest.
I bet 24 hours ago you didn't think
you'd be spending the night here.
You were lucky last night, Nelson.
Don't push it.
I want to wish you two
the best of everything together.
I know you'll be healthy,
wealthy and happy in your wealth.
Hello.
May I speak to Anne Coldren?
- Hello.
- Anne?
Hi. I have been thinking about you
all day. How are you?
- Counting the days to Thanksgiving.
- Me, too.
I've got to transfer to a school
closer to you or get a faster car.
Maybe we should have gotten married
last summer.
My mother wasn't ready yet.
Honey, you're the best.
If anything
should ever happen...
- Joe, what's wrong?
- I don 't know. I'm tired.
I'm not making sense.
I should go.
- What's the matter? You're scaring me.
- It's okay, honey.
Nothing's wrong.
I love you.
Bye.
Ah, there.
It's a boy.
Nothing.
Starting CPR.
- CPR, adrenaline and nothing!
- 1:45.
What's going on?
Come on, Joe!
- 3-1,000.
- Let me try.
- Breathe!
- We're running out of time.
- Let me try!
- I'm doing everything I can. Breathe!
- Let him try.
- Nelson, step back.
Got him! 02.
CPR successful.
Hurley lives.
It's okay, Joe.
- It was great.
- Here it comes.
- Just let him talk.
- Define "great."
I don't know.
It's not thinking about the past
or the future.
It's difficult to explain.
Maybe impossible.
Dying is funny that way.
Nelson's right. There definitely
is activity beyond death.
Absolutely.
The experience was strange.
It was almost erotic.
He's dead and he gets laid.
Wait a second.
What do you mean, "erotic"?
I don't want you to think it was
casually, wantonly sexual by any means.
That never would have occurred to me
in a million years.
It was friendly.
There was something vaguely feminine
guiding me.
This could be the conquest
of our generation.
The last great frontier.
First you had...
the sea, then America.
Then the West, the moon.
Mr. Leary, drugs,
the inner journey.
Miss MacLaine, and our former
First Lady, the outer journey.
- But this is ours.
- We did have disco.
We have found something worthwhile
to upstage those fucking baby boomers.
Watch your mouths.
I found something.
Let's not forget that.
I came back from the dead tonight.
Doesn't surprise me.
We had Elvis in here last night.
Pay when you're ready, okay?
Did you find it difficult at the end,
getting back?
Not that I remember.
But you remember everything else?
You guys are full of shit.
I'm not buying any of this.
I probably wouldn't buy it either
unless I'd been there.
- What about it?
- You're an atheist.
You've got nothing to lose.
I'm going next.
Wait a minute.
Nobody...
is going next.
There's no answers here.
You saw what you wanted to see.
- Give it up. It's getting too dangerous.
- Who the hell are you...
We can't turn back now.
I'm going further. 1:50.
Two minutes.
- Whoa, you just said...
- I changed my mind. Two minutes.
- 2:10.
- 2:20.
Well, looks like
we found a winner.
Enjoying yourself, Nelson?
Joe...
was there anything negative
about your experience?
Anything negative at all?
No. Nothing.
Good.
Hold on.
- Was that your idea of chivalry?
- Absolutely not.
Maybe trying to show me up.
What makes you think everything
is always about you?
Because nobody seems to want me to
go under. I don't need your protection.
There seems to be a lot of speculation
about what you do need, Manus.
Does there? And what did you decide
in your infinite wisdom?
I decided that when someone
as smart and driven as you are...
and incredibly beautiful...
it makes the rest of us
very nervous.
Why'd you change your mind?
I'm the skeptic, the control
on this experiment. I should go next.
If there's nothing there,
I won't convince myself there is.
Then there's no reason for us
to go any further.
How do you explain the similarity
of death experiences all over the world?
People from different cultures
and religions...
all seeing the same things
in the same order.
I don't know. Maybe there's a chemical
or hormone released from the brain...
at the time of death
that makes it more palatable to us.
No, you're reaching.
What if you go
and there is something out there?
Well, then you can kill yourself
for as long as you want.
I'm not going to kill myself.
I'm glad to hear that because
I haven't known you for long...
but I might miss you.
Why this obsession with death?
It's not an obsession,
it's an interest.
It's a personal interest.
Good night.
Can I drive you home?
No, thanks.
I didn't take your money.
You gave it to me.
I got your toaster.
Too many appliances make you love me.
Right, Nelson?
Because in the end,
we all know what we've done.
Champ?
Come on, boy!
Come here. Champ?
Come here, boy.
Come on. Champ!
What are you doing here, kid?
You all right?
You okay?
Are you lost?
Halloween morning.
Rotting pumpkins.
Burning leaves.
Black cats mating like rats
in the alley.
It was as...
It were as if we felt no fear.
As if we were already dead...
and had nothing to lose by dying.
Or perhaps it was because
we lived life so well...
and loved life so much...
that we imagined ourselves immortal...
overwhelming the powers that be with
the force of our passion for science.
Or maybe we were just fucked
in the head.
I'm Joe Hurley.
You're Terry, right?
I heard you had
a near-death experience.
I don't want to talk about it.
Wait a minute.
I had a near-death experience also.
- You did?
- Yes, and I need somebody to talk to.
This thing changed my life.
First of all,
they didn't believe me.
What the hell do they know?
We were there, right?
Tell me all about it.
But if you have class...
maybe we can get together some night
and discuss it.
All that day,
I knew something was going to happen.
I've always had premonitions.
Once my aunt was supposed
to fly in from Las Vegas.
Why'd you do this to me, Joe?
Shit!
Trick or treat!
I don't know. It's Halloween.
There's a full moon.
Don't you think we're pushing it
a bit?
- Sorry I'm late.
- What happened to your face?
Some very big guys.
It doesn't matter.
- Let me look at it.
- I'm fine.
- Where have you been?
- I don't feel well.
- What happened to you?
- Enough. Worry about your camera.
Nice outfit.
- You ready?
- I'm ready.
Who are you supposed to be,
Boner Man?
Just hurry and get back.
You can buy us breakfast.
- Nelson?
- What?
Don't let go of the rope.
Hoka hey.
See you soon.
- 86 degrees.
- 200 joules charged.
Clear.
Flatline.
What hangs in the air palpably?
Is it hope, fear,
the musky fear of death?
- Shut up.
- No, you shut up.
What if he didn't make it back?
Would you miss him, Rachel?
One minute.
- 90 degrees.
- Let's give him another five seconds.
- What?
- Why not ten?
We have time to decide.
Are you serious?
I trusted you, Joe.
Stations.
You're blocking our view.
- No kidding around. 2:10.
- Who's kidding?
- What's going on?
- 92 degrees.
Get it!
Come on.
This is my lab.
Charged.
Clear.
Three, six, nine
The goose drank wine
The monkey chewed tobacco
on the streetcar line
The line broke
The monkey got choked
They all went to heaven
in a little rowboat
- Breathe.
- Sodium bicarb and Eppy in.
What comes next?
- Knock it off!
- 5-1,000. Breathe.
Clear.
Come on, Dave.
That's it!
That's not it. He's stuck in V-fib.
Charging again. 300.
- You're hot.
- Try lidocaine.
- At 2:45, atropine.
- Not yet. Clear.
Come on, Dave.
Increasing defibs to 360.
Charge. Clear.
- Go to lidocaine!
- He won't hold the heat.
Three minutes.
Starting CPR. 1-1,000.
- Atropine in.
- Keep filming. I'll bring him back.
- 5-1,000. Breathe.
- You lied to me, Joe.
Lost him.
- Lidocaine push.
- Somebody do something.
- Got him!
- 02 standing by.
- One milligram Eppy in.
- That sounds good.
That was close.
That was way too close.
Okay? That was too close.
Hoka hey.
- What did you say there?
- Hoka hey.
It's a war cry from the Sioux Indians.
Very macho. It means, today...
Today is a good day to die.
So was it, Dave?
Was today a good day to die?
I don't know if I was dead.
I may have felt something.
Like a dream...
or just a bunch of stuff
stored up inside my mind.
You were brain dead.
There was no mind.
But some electrical current's
still circulating through my body.
It would have shown up on the EEG.
You were dead.
Tell us what happened.
It's hard to verbalize.
It's like being paranoid
without the fear.
Like being watched.
It was probably just you guys
standing over me.
Who could be watching?
- The dead.
- I didn't say that.
But the skeptic did feel something,
didn't you? I'm going again.
No way!
I've been bumped twice!
Bidding starts at four minutes.
Labraccio went for 3:50.
That was a mistake.
We almost lost him.
Anything under four minutes.
Would be redundant.
No one is going for four minutes.
- Five minutes.
- I'm next or I'm out for good.
Without her help,
five minutes will be hard enough.
- But without me...
- Or me...
Count me out, too.
Well, mutiny at last.
I trusted you,
all of you...
with an idea so simple and brilliant,
you get one in a lifetime.
- Give it a rest.
- You give it a rest!
None of you had the foresight or balls
to do any of this until I did it.
You want to go next?
Be my guest.
Fuck the rest of you!
This is my idea.
You're just tourists.
I would've gone 3:30, maybe 3:40.
I still might.
But, Joe, 4:25 is crazy.
We're pushing the five minute mark.
Dangerous! Zucchini land!
You're a shit, Joe.
You said you loved me, Joe.
I love you, Joe.
Skelator?
Are you listening to me?
Thanks for staying.
I'm on early shift at the hospital.
You seem fine,
so I'll see you later.
Wait.
- About tonight.
- Don't try to talk me out of it.
Why are you doing this?
Look, I've lost people
that are close to me.
I want to make sure they've gone
to a good place. It does seem trivial.
To tell you the truth, it's the best
reason I've heard yet for going.
There's something I didn't tell you
about last night.
I had this feeling that if I had gone
any further...
that there was something out there
protecting me.
You know, something good.
So you don't need to go under.
Does the atheist now believe in God?
I'm trying to tell you...
that I don't want you to do it.
Just think about all I'll have
to talk about...
when you bring me back.
I'm dying.
Don't lie to me.
You've put up a great fight.
Sometimes we just have to let go.
That's what the voices say.
What voices?
They say, "Have you done enough?
Have you told everyone you loved them?"
I have. I have.
It's okay.
They're friendly voices.
They're just telling you
what you need to know.
What?
That you have someplace to go.
Do you believe that?
I do.
Yes, I do.
Hey, Fellatio!
Got a match?
Well, I do!
Your face and my ass.
- Your breath made of buffalo fart!
- Do I know you?
You don't know jackshit!
Butt-wipe! Needle-dick! Cock-bite!
Jack-off! Limp-wrist!
Corn-hole! Banana-breath!
Shit-bird! Bird-turd! Turd-face!
Kiss-ass! Brown-Nose! Macho wimp!
Limp-dick! Fart-face! Tire-merchant!
What's the matter?
Gonna cry? Crybaby Davie.
Cry, cry, cry!
Shit-face. Rat-turd.
Ass-licking son of a bitch.
How'd it happen?
I was playing hockey.
- About last night.
- It's okay.
No-show Labraccio.
This really isn't like him.
It's his way of trying to stop me.
It won't work. I'm ready.
I don't think it is a good idea
to do this without David.
- We don't need Dave.
- Can you do this?
Can you trust me?
No, but let's do it anyway.
Nitrous on.
See you soon.
- How long has she been under?
- 1:20.
We're bringing her back.
Click that blanket to warm. Body temp?
- She hasn't been under long enough.
- Do it.
- We said 4:25.
- Just do it!
Don't expect hugs and kisses
for this.
Waiting for body temp to rise.
Aborting fourth experiment. Why, Dave?
Ask Dr. Death.
- 90 degrees.
- What's going on?
Nothing. Bringing Rachel back early.
That's all.
- That's all?
- Don't start now! Think about Rachel.
Joe's right. 91 degrees.
Let's be ready.
I told you not to go in there!
I told you not to do that!
It's your fault!
- Nothing!
- Take me up to 300.
- You're hot.
- Clear.
- Come on, Rachel.
- Not a thing. 2:05.
- You're hot.
- Come on, Rachel.
- Got her!
- You don't have her!
- It's okay, we'll get her.
- Step me up to 360. Clear.
What the hell is going on?
What'd you do to me? I had her.
A fuse. Short.
Maybe a circuit.
- Joe, you charged the battery, right?
- Shit!
Starting CPR.
Bag her.
- 3-1,000. 4-1,000. 5-1,000. Breathe.
- No pulse.
Begin. 1-1,000.
- This is not working. Joe, take over.
- I got her.
She's been under four minutes.
We're moving to Bretylium.
It's the only way.
- It's our last chance.
- Don't. You will fry her.
Please don't.
You bring her back.
Come on.
Lidocaine in.
Come on, Manus.
Come on back to us.
I got something.
I hear something.
O2. O2.
She's back.
- Why did you stop us?
- Something strange happened on the EI.
- That's why you stopped us?
- There was this girl. Winnie Hicks.
I was in elementary school with her.
We used to make fun of her.
I was on the train.
I heard someone call me names.
I turned, I swear to God,
and she was standing in front of me.
- Still only 10 years old.
- Maybe it was an hallucination.
Maybe you fell asleep,
thoughts triggered by submerged guilt.
I was not asleep.
I've seen odd things from my past, too.
I thought it might be brain damage.
In your case, it probably is.
I'm getting this on tape.
- Shut that off. This is personal.
- Go ahead, Joe.
I've been haunted by images of women
I videotaped without them knowing.
They're all members
of the Joe Hurley video library.
What?
What about you, Nelson?
Who's come looking for you?
I think his name's Billy Mahoney,
an eight-year-old kid we picked on.
- It was no big deal.
- No big deal, huh?
Then tell us what happened
to your face.
Sometimes the little fella
gets carried away.
Wait a minute. Wait.
I can understand...
Dave nodding off and pervert here
having flashbacks.
This guy physically touches you? It is
not hallucination and is not possible.
This whole lab's not possible.
Or is it?
- This is too weird.
- Weird? We've experienced death.
Somehow we brought our sins
back physically, and they're pissed.
When did you know about this?
I had my suspicions after Joe went.
- Before we went? You didn't say a word!
- That was wrong.
I thought we were doctors, scientists.
You call yourself a scientist?
It is reckless and unethical for you
to withhold findings from us.
Rachel Manus may have the answers
to life and death.
Five minutes. Imagine that!
She was under for five minutes!
If she walks out of that ladies room
with those answers...
the whole world will worship her.
Just like you do.
You should've told us.
- You wouldn't have done it.
- We would've had a choice!
We're fucked.
You all right?
I'm okay.
I said I was fine!
You guys gonna watch me?
Come on, Billy Mahoney.
Come on.
Give me your best shot.
I dare you.
I fucking dare you.
Things from our past?
They want revenge?
I don't know.
I'm not exactly sure how it works.
But if you see anything...
talk to me about it.
Whatever it is,
tell the doctor.
I'll be in the living room
if you need me.
Is it people who we've...
hurt or wronged in some way?
Did something happen tonight?
Want to talk to me about something?
Try to get some rest.
- How is she doing?
- I think she's hiding something.
- Like what? Heebie-jeebie stuff?
- What did Nelson do to that kid?
How the hell am I supposed to know?
It's important
we keep each other informed.
I'm sorry. You guys take off.
I'll stay with her.
- You okay?
- I'm fine. I'm sorry.
We're gonna get you, Billy Mahoney!
I'm sorry!
Stop, Nelson!
- How you doing?
- I'm late. I'll see you later.
Wait a minute.
Where are you going?
I have to talk to her.
I've got to stop her.
Talk to who?
Good morning, Rachel.
I wanted to tell her
the voices were wrong.
There's nothing beautiful
out there.
Losing them is part of our work.
But I was wrong.
Crybaby, cry!
You look like
you're enjoying the day.
Yeah, right.
Don't you remember me, Joe?
Yes, of course.
Are you a model?
- You could be.
- I've got to go.
I'm not picking you up.
I just picked you out.
- Mind if I buy you a drink?
- No, thanks.
- I'll call about being my study partner.
- Fine. I'm in the book.
Hey, gorgeous.
- How are you?
- What are you doing?
Some crazy girl...
I know you, don't I?
Would you like to?
We don't have to do anything.
We can just lie together.
Hold each other in our underwear.
I'll call you.
I promise.
I'm tired of playing the field.
We can stop whenever you want.
It'll only make
our relationship better.
I've never felt like this before.
I'm tired of playing the field.
- Of course I respect you.
- You can stop whenever you want.
I need you to show me
that you love me.
You're not real!
Anne, is that you?
Is that really you?
You sounded so upset on the phone.
I was worried.
I took the bus down.
What a great surprise!
How long have you been here?
Long enough to see your tapes.
Oh, my God!
You know...
you'll think I'm leaving you
because you slept with those girls.
It was a stupid game.
They meant nothing to me.
I wish they had meant something,
because if you were honest...
if you had cared for any of them,
I could have fought that.
I loved you. But to film all those girls
without them knowing it.
To have so little respect.
Those women trusted you.
What kind of marriage can we have
when you have no understanding of trust?
Please!
- It's not what you think.
- Yes, it is.
Hello. Is this Mrs. Earl R. Hicks?
This is a strange question.
Do you have a daughter Winnie, about 26?
You do? Great!
My name is David Labraccio.
I was in school with Winnie.
We went to S.B. Butler together.
My parents still live there.
Fine.
I wanted to get in touch with her.
I was wondering...
Right.
Okay. And do you have
an address for her?
Great. Thank you, Mrs. Hicks.
I appreciate it. Bye.
Jesus!
Looks as bad as it feels, huh?
Want me to take a look?
I just want to know
how Rachel was doing.
She didn't come out of the bathroom
with the answers to life and death.
I gotta go.
- Where are you going?
- Bensenville.
- Could I go?
- It's a two-hour drive.
Look...
I don't want to be alone.
Today we are going to remove
the left kidney...
and dissect the lower intestines.
Remove the ascending colon
from the transverse colon.
Proceed to the sigmoid colon
and on to the appendix.
Remove the appendix,
taking note of the blood supply.
Where the hell
do you think you're going?
You okay?
I would be if everyone would
stop asking me if I'm all right.
Are you crazy?
Is she getting the heebie-jeebies?
I'm spooking.
Getting us kicked out of med school
won't get Anne back. Get to work.
I'll handle this.
Back to work or suffer the consequences.
Fuck it.
- This must be it.
- Looks like Winnie did well for herself.
She's probably not going to remember
who you are.
It's worth a shot.
You coming?
Listen, if anything happens...
if you need me,
just honk the horn.
Ring, ring, ring.
- Dave, you should've sent a letter.
- Hello!
Anybody home?
Is your mother at home?
Coming.
Go in the house, baby.
Yes? Can I help you?
Yeah. I think you can.
You're Winnie Hicks, aren't you?
- From Clairemont?
- Yes.
I'm David Labraccio.
- We went to S.B. Butler together.
- Really?
I was a little smaller then.
I drove from the city.
That's my truck.
Hello. I'm nice.
He's nice.
We're both fucking lunatics.
Can I come in, please?
Thanks a lot.
I've got to hand it to you.
You've got guts.
This is great!
It's beautiful.
Looks like you've done well
for yourself.
It isn't medical school.
But I never liked school, anyway.
Wasn't very good at it.
I'm surprised you remember me.
I do remember you.
I also remember the way
we treated you back then.
You were shy, and I was a real jerk,
and I'm sorry.
I wanted to say I'm sorry.
What are you talking about?
That was so long ago.
I don't remember what you could've done.
Let's not dredge up all that stuff.
Sherry, go in the house.
However we made you feel,
it was wrong.
I mean, we were wrong.
Go on.
I have a family now.
I haven't been that ugly little girl
in quite some time.
You were never ugly.
Why did you come here?
David, help!
It was just kids.
I know how kids are.
It didn't mean anything.
Listen, I didn't mean to come here...
Winnie, are you all right?
I'm fine, Ben.
Everything's okay.
I'm sorry if I made you feel bad.
I didn't want to hurt you again.
I'm going to go.
Thank you.
Are you sure?
Thanks.
Shit!
Help!
Help!
Nelson, stop it!
Nelson, stop, stop!
- Stop it!
- Where's Billy Mahoney? Where is he?
There is no Billy.
It's just the two of us.
We're all alone.
Let it go.
Where the hell have you guys been?
- She freaked. We stayed with her.
- How you doing?
I'm fine.
Fine for somebody who keeps running into
her father who's been dead for 20 years.
Death is beautiful?
What a bunch of crap.
How you doing, Nelson?
You okay?
'Cause I'd like to thank you
for the nightmare.
Hey, you guys were all so eager
to jump on my coattails.
Well, welcome aboard.
You withheld information.
That's lying.
Oh. I'm sorry you're so upset.
You think you're the only one
who risked something?
I always felt there was something
unnatural about this.
- You didn't risk a goddamn thing!
- Screw yourself!
This is not going to help.
We're in this together.
No, we're not.
- Wait.
- Isn't she strong? So independent.
When I get into trouble,
I don't drag everybody down with me.
Drag everybody? Come on!
What happened to you? You got caught
with your videotapes down?
And you swore at a little girl
on a playground. Oh!
And now you're having bad dreams
about your daddy. I'm really sorry.
You don't know anything about me.
You never have.
But Dave does, doesn't he?
Come on, they're your sins!
Live with them.
I do.
Do you want to see death?
Take a good look.
It is beautiful.
You've already hurt yourself.
You want to hurt her, too?
Do you?
Help him find Billy Mahoney.
- How will that help?
- Goddamn it! Just help him find Billy.
Don't leave him alone.
Why do we want to find Billy Mahoney?
Because...
young Dr. Dave thinks he's solved
our karmic problems.
Atonement, gentlemen.
Atonement?
Wait a goddamn minute.
Jesus, you're always
running away from me.
Why don't you talk to me?
My father shot himself
when I was five.
And you feel responsible?
There was a door in our hallway
I wasn't supposed to go in.
Kids always feel responsible.
You could not have been the blame.
You said it yourself.
People we wronged want revenge.
I don't know if this will help,
but going to see Winnie Hicks today...
I don't know how to explain it,
but it lifted...
Somehow just asking for forgiveness...
Winnie Hicks is alive.
My father's dead.
Your father is in a good place.
He wants you to let him go.
Then why is he back?
- Here.
- Where the hell are we?
We should get your face looked at
at a hospital.
Come on.
This is a shortcut.
I can't believe
I remember all of this.
Holy shit!
The neighborhood's falling apart.
Nelson, give me the keys.
Step on a crack
Break your mother's back
Olly, olly, oxen free!
Last one over is a rotten egg.
Come on, boys,
salvation just ahead.
This is a graveyard.
- Where the fuck are you, Nelson?
- This isn't funny anymore.
It never was.
- Where the hell are you?
- Right here.
This is where Billy lives.
Wake up, you little shit!
You got company!
Want to know how
I knew he was here?
'Cause I put him here.
Billy Mahoney!
Stop, Nelson.
No, don't do it!
Please stop.
I was taken away from my family
when I was nine years old.
I was sent
to Stoneham School for Boys.
I thought I'd paid my dues!
It was an accident.
Let's go home, okay?
Dave's right.
I can still make amends.
How?
Joe, I gotta borrow your car.
Nelson, wait!
Oh, my God.
Hello?
What?
Where?
Ah, Jesus. All right.
Hold on a minute.
Nelson freaked out.
Joe and Steckle are stranded.
You be all right alone?
Are you sure?
Daddy.
Sweetheart.
I'm sorry.
Will you forgive me?
Will you ever forgive me?
Oh, my daddy!
Billy Mahoney died 17 years ago.
Nelson feels responsible.
- Jesus Christ! Any idea where he went?
- Something about making amends.
How can you make amends
with somebody who's dead?
- Would he try to flatline without us?
- That would be suicide.
No, it's Nelson.
Where are you?
David's trying to find you.
I wanted to say I was sorry.
Please tell David...
I'm sorry for getting
any of you involved.
No. You don't understand.
None of that matters now.
Everything matters.
Everything we do matters.
That's why I'm going under again.
Wait.
- Good-bye, Rachel.
- Tell me where you are.
- I really am sorry.
- Please wait.
- We're paying for our arrogance.
- Save it, Randy.
Good thing I didn't flatline.
My 350-pound baby-sitter would chase me
with a pastrami sandwich I stole.
Okay, Billy Mahoney, come on.
I'm gonna catch you!
Oh, God!
Body temp down to 78.
- Potassium. He used potassium!
- Christ!
Electrodes!
Calcium in.
- Nothing.
- Go again.
- Clear!
- Nothing.
Up to 360. Clear!
Nothing.
I can't hear anything.
- He called. It's been over nine minutes.
- Nine minutes?
Let's intubate.
- Breathe!
- Damn! The trachea's too tight.
Try again.
Come on!
Stop, Billy!
Stop, Billy! Stop!
Get him!
Eppy in!
- Breathe!
- Nothing.
- 88 degrees.
- Get 4 milligrams of atropine ready.
- All right. Atropine intratracheal.
- This is a truckload.
This has got to work.
Come on back, Nelson.
Come on, come on, Nelson.
Come on.
- He's been dead 10 minutes.
- Bretylium!
- No, he's not in V-fib.
- He's dead.
- Eppy intracardial!
- No, Rachel!
Just do it!
Stop! Don't!
Don't do it, Billy!
I'm sorry!
Starting CPR!
It's been 12 minutes.
He is dead!
- Forget about it. We lost him!
- No, you son of a bitch!
Dave, stop it!
Let him go.
We're all responsible for this.
- Maybe we deserve this.
- No. It's not fair and it's not right.
I'm sorry, God. I'm sorry we stepped
on your fucking territory!
I'm sorry!
Isn't that enough?
Apparently not.
I'll call the police.
I could hear it in his voice
on the phone.
Nelson felt he deserved to die.
Bullshit!
It was a mistake.
He was just a little kid!
And he doesn't deserve to die!
Come on, Nelson!
Come on, Nelson.
Come on, come on.
Charged! Clear!
Wait!
Oh, my God!
I got a pulse! We've got him!
- We've fucking got him!
- Nelson, pick up the beat!
Easy, easy. Don't rush him.
Oh, my God.
Come on, Nelson, pick up the beat.
Don't rush him.
That's it. That's it.
There we go.
Hail Mary, praise Jesus,
all that stuff.
Thank you, Jesus.
Hi, Nelson.
Don't talk.
I've got to get this on tape.
He said...
it wasn't such a good day to die.
Thank you.