# Come along
# Come along
# There's a full moon shinin' bright
# Come along
# Come along
# We're gonna hit St Louis tonight
# Spend your money
# Lookin' at the chorus line
# Spend your money
# Win it on the number nine
# Take your sweetheart
# Even though she's never been
# If she's worried
# Tell her that you always win
# Come along
# Come along
# There's a full moon shinin' bright
# Come along
# Come along
# You're gonna win a fortune tonight
# Hear the whistle
# Lady Luck's about to go
# Is she smiling?
# Maybe yes or maybe no
# Now's the time when
# Nights are filled with sweet romance
# Don't be bashful
# Step on up and take a chance
# Come along
# Come along
# There's a full moon shinin' bright
# Come along
# Come along
# We're gonna hit St Louis tonight
# Come along
# Come along
# You're gonna win a fortune tonight
Boss, they just stopped a customer
from betting a roll of these. Why?
- Why? Because it's Confederate money.
- Money's money, ain't it?
Blackie, I don't know
what I'd do without you.
- You'd manage.
- Thanks.
Escort the gentleman gently to the deck.
Then kick him down the gangplank.
No more bets.
- Seen Johnny? It's nearly showtime.
- He made his daily bet. He went thataway.
- The rabbit's foot didn't help?
- Help? He lost that too.
OK. New shoot. Come on out.
Johnny?
12 straight times he drew cards to 12,
on account of today is the 12th.
- He didn't even win once?
- With me dealing?
- Hey, piano player.
- Yes, Mr Braden?
- Tonight, play the notes as written.
- I'll use both hands.
And if Johnny is late again,
I hope he can dance with a broken leg.
That's what I like about you, Boss.
Always ready with a pat on the back.
Place your bets!
- You seen Johnny?
- Look under the nearest pair of dice.
- Don't you even say hello to your wife?
- Hello, Wife.
Peg, how can I get Johnny
to give up gambling?
Easy. A bullet in the head, poison in his
coffee, a fatal knife wound. Nothin' to it.
Where were you?
I lost you at the blackjack table.
A guy told me about a gypsy fortune-teller.
She's got a hot cup of tea leaves.
I'm a coffee man, myself.
What became of your astrologer? She
couldn't read the stars on a cloudy night?
- You gotta have faith, Cully.
- And money.
- What did you lose tonight?
- How much did I have?
That's what you lost last night.
You're holding your own.
Seven years' bad luck.
- It was already cracked.
- OK. Only five.
- Be over before you know it.
- Aw...
Hey, five. That's a hunch.
Loan me five bucks.
- I can't afford you.
- Put the five on number five.
- I'll lose my job if I'm late.
- I'll lose confidence if I pass up a hunch.
Hello, Johnny.
Hello, Johnny.
Say goodbye, Johnny.
They're wearing mittens out there tonight.
- They just don't appreciate talent.
- No.
Onstage for "Petunia".
- Always brings me luck.
- You need a new horseshoe.
# I've got a gal
# Oh, what a pal
# The apple of my eye
# We're something rare
# A peach of a pair
# But her dad won't let us meet
# And I could die
# I love Petunia the gardener's daughter
# Ooh, how that gal can kiss
# My eyes are blue as bluebells,
each cheek a rose to see
# How I dance when she plants
her two lips on me
# He's as daffy as a daffodil
# He loves to kiss me all the time
# Tonight I'll steal into her garden
# And make Petunia's two lips mine
# She makes other girls
look just like weeds
# I wanna be his clinging vine
# Tonight I'll steal into her garden
# And make Petunia's two lips
# My ever-lovin' two lips
# Make Petunia's two lips mine
- What were those signals?
- What signals?
- Between you and Cully. I'm not blind.
- Oh, those signals.
- He just made a little bet for me.
- Can't you lose fast enough alone?
- Where are you going?
- To have my head examined.
You can't help it if you're in love.
You're born losers, both of you!
- What's the matter with her?
- She's crazy about the wrong guy: Me.
I am a loser.
But, if I had 20 bucks, I could be a winner.
I hate myself for asking, but how?
This gypsy fortune-teller, everybody
who takes her advice is hittin' it rich.
- So how come she lives in a wagon?
- It's loaded with gold. You got 20 bucks?
Lucky for you, it just so happens...
You are the lowest person that ever lived.
- Peg, my sweetheart, you've missed me.
- You're not what I've missed.
- No?
- No!
I've missed the $50
I hid in my winter lingerie.
I never could keep out of your...
Ow! Oh! You didn't have to stab me.
I should've listened to my mother.
She said you were just like my father.
I could never drink that much.
Don't you dare say one word
about my drunken old man.
- Where's the money?
- I lost it, Peg, all of it. Honest.
- He loaned me the last five dollars.
- You stay out of this.
Convince me. Take off your shoes.
- My shoes?!
- Off!
Love and trust -
that's what makes a marriage great.
See? I could never lie to you.
Well, there's a $10 lie.
- Now, how did that get in there?
- I wonder
Goodbye, gypsy.
Hello, Zolita!
Business is awful.
Why don't you have a talk
with your crystal ball?
Maybe these are two live ones.
What shall I promise them?
A long journey or sudden wealth?
As long as it costs you nothing,
give them both.
Ah, gentlemen!
You have come to the right place.
The one, the only, the incomparable...
Zolita.
The kid's got problems. Keeps breakin'
mirrors and walkin' under black cats.
Yes, my son.
You look troubled - deeply troubled.
It's worse than that.
I can't break my losing streak.
- Oh, you are a gambling man.
- Every cent I make.
I could sure use some motherly advice.
Mother Zolita can only interpret, my son.
Perhaps the tea leaves
will forecast failure, perhaps success.
I am merely a princess with a rare gift,
handed down
from generation to generation.
- Didn't I tell you she was great?
- She hasn't said anything yet.
The leaves are ready to speak.
No lemon?
The tea leaves have spoken.
If you do not mind! I work alone.
What do they spell, mother?
How lucky you are! The wheel of fortune
has stopped at your number.
- Wheel? That's roulette.
- And I see a dice table too.
No blackjack? This boy plays all games.
And a new woman
is coming into your life.
A beautiful young redhead.
It can't be a redhead, princess.
My girl's a blonde. Take another look.
Now I see a blonde.
Oh, but she has been bad luck for you.
The tea leaves say
you will have good luck with the redhead.
I know better. I married one. Take
the advice of a 20-year loser: No redheads!
He must not defy the tea leaves.
- How will you explain her to Frankie?
- We'll just use her to make a bundle.
You're gonna pass off a beautiful redhead
as a good-luck piece? Good luck!
- If I may be so crude...
- Oh, sure.
Please. The princess never
soils her royal hands with money.
Ten dollars? When the tea leaves promise
a beautiful redhead, it is twenty dollars.
It's a lot of money for a cup of tea.
That's a gypsy. Takes all your dough
so you can't take her advice.
Minor problems like that
I cannot solve.
- Maybe Braden will give you an advance.
- I'm already in for five weeks' salary.
That you lost right back into his pocket.
Braden's got a nice little thing goin' there.
Ever know a gambler who couldn't
promote a little bettin' money?
- You also need chesay.
- Chesay? Who's that?
Chesay is gypsy good luck.
Lazlo!
# Drink a cup of gypsy luck
# Just keep it up
and then you just say "chesay"
# Swallow once,
then swallow twice
# Goes down so nice
Just say "chesay"
Hey!
# What's in the drink
to chase the devil away?
# Lightning, I think
# So just say "chesay"
# Chesay, chesay
brings you good luck night and day
# Chesay, chesay
That's the gypsy way
# Trouble is my middle name
though it's such a crying shame
# I try and try
There's nothing I can do
# But I'm feeling kinda strange
Feel like things are gonna change
# Time my lucky star was shining through
# Chesay, chesay
brings you good luck night and day
# Chesay, chesay
That's the gypsy way
# Drink a cup of gypsy luck
# Just tip it up and then
you just say "chesay"
# Swallow once,
then swallow twice
# Goes down so nice
Just say "chesay"
Hey!
# What's in the drink
to chase the devil away?
# Magic, I think
# So just say "chesay"
# Chesay, chesay
brings you good luck night and day
# Chesay, chesay
That's the gypsy way
# Chesay, chesay
brings you good luck night and day
# Chesay, chesay
That's the gypsy way
# Chesay, chesay
brings you good luck night and day
# Chesay, chesay
That's the gypsy way
Chesay!
Have you seen Cully?
He's been missing for an hour.
- Have you tried the Lost and Found?
- No. I'm afraid they'll find him.
I always know where to find Johnny -
In the casino, losing his shirt.
Well, with the way the other girls look at
him, you're lucky he isn't playing around.
Know what I'd do
if he ever did me wrong?
- Shoot yourself?
- No, him!
Bang, bang, bang!
One last request before I cross
the great footlights up yonder.
Like what?
Would you loan me 25 bucks
so I can pay Cully what I owe him?
- Cully loaned you 25? Where'd he get it?
- Between my nightgown and petticoat.
Do you know how much
you owe me already?
Who's counting?
- You sure this money's not for gambling?
- Word of honour.
And may you never kiss me again.
He sounds sincere.
What would you do, Peg?
What any woman with an ounce
of pride or self-respect would do:
Give him the money.
Greatest little bank in America.
- Two greatest little banks in America.
- Shame you don't have an account there.
Five... ten...
...fifteen... twenty... twenty-five.
- That makes us even.
- I didn't think Frankie'd give you a dime.
- What have you got left to play with?
- Oh, I'm broke.
But I got a rich friend who will loan me...
Five, ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five.
- Better count it to be sure it's all there.
- What for? I trust you.
Now all we need is a beautiful redhead.
Nellie! Nellie Bly!
Hello, Blackie.
Hey, you look great!
How did New York treat you?
They didn't believe my billing:
"The Singing Queen of the Riverboats".
- How's the action?
- The boss never had it rollin' in so fast.
Money isn't everything, but it never
made a man look less attractive.
- Put those in my old room, Mac.
- Does Mr Braden know you're back?
No. I want to surprise him.
Is he in his office?
Don't surprise him now. Go in and win a
few bucks till he spruces up for you, huh?
- Who is she?
- Oh, that's not nice.
Has Mr Braden ever cheated on you?
Well, has he?
Still protecting him, aren't you?
Why not? Who baled me out
and got me a job?
And who made a gentleman out of me?
OK, OK. Go ring the fire bell.
Tell Braden I'll meet him in the casino
after I pretty up for him.
Are you really going to
make me a star, Mr Braden?
It's not me that'll do it, Mitzi.
It's your talent.
- I do have talent, don't I?
- You're loaded with it.
Hey, Boss. You got one girl too many.
Nellie Bly just came aboard.
When you've got a message
like that, whisper.
Nellie's in the casino, waiting for you.
She doesn't know about you and Mitzi.
It's happened to me again?
I don't get my name in lights?
- You don't have the talent, Mitzi.
- But a minute ago you said...
The only woman who ever gave me
bubbles like that champagne is back.
And she's funny.
She thinks three is a crowd.
Why, you...!
Ooh!
Hi, Mitzi.
The boss in a bad mood again?
Bad? He never felt better.
His favourite girl came back.
I thought you were.
I just found out
I've been understudying the part.
In my next life I hope I'm not a girl.
I could never go through that again.
- 26, black, even.
- Let's try another table.
- All blondes. I can't go against Zolita.
- You're too darned particular.
- The gypsy said a beautiful redhead.
- Then we're wasting our time here.
- Seven blondes. Not one redhead.
- Seven.
- That's a hunch bet if ever I heard one.
- I'll tell the gypsy on you.
- Place your bets.
- On seven.
- Oh, no, lady! That's the kiss of death.
- I'm sorry.
- Off seven.
- Hold it. Maybe that's your lucky redhead.
- Are you?
- The action's over there.
No more bets.
Seven! A winner. Red.
35 times 20...
You would've won 700 bucks!
If she can do it once, she can do it again.
- Are you a real redhead?
- I'm a real everything.
- What's your lucky number?
- One. One at a time.
One it is. Would you mind
giving 'em your magic touch?
Just for luck.
- You better get the bottom one too.
- Place your bets!
By this time tomorrow,
this ship should be the SS Johnny.
- What's your name, Lucky?
- Nellie Bly.
- Welcome aboard.
- That's it! Bly!
I need a name to rhyme with "eye" for
a song I'm writing. Now I got it. Nellie Bly!
- You'll be famous in a song.
- I've tried every other way.
I don't even have to look.
I know it's gonna be number one.
One, red.
- Maybe that gypsy knew something!
- Maybe? My future just got here!
One hundred...
- two hundred...
- Place your bets.
...three hundred...
- It's the break I've been wait...
...four hundred...
- Hey, where'd she go?
- What about these chips?
- I'll be right back.
Nellie, it's been a long year.
You never looked better.
You have. Who's been
keeping you up nights?
Who can remember names?
- What kind of a kiss is that?
- We are not starting where we left off.
I like a girl who remembers
the good things in life.
I thought you came back
because you missed me.
I wasn't good enough for Broadway.
I'm big in the small time
and small in the big time.
You'll always be my star attraction.
What about the girl last week?
And the girl before her and before her...
- A man gets lonely.
- Lonely enough to get married?
- Not marriage again?
- My mother recommends it highly.
Your mother doesn't know me.
What would you do
if I got big eyes for someone else?
- Nothing.
- Nothing?
I might arrange to have his neck broken.
But, outside of that, nothing.
- Come here.
- Hey, Boss.
A customer wants to raise the limit.
- How's he doing?
- Big loser.
Losers we always accommodate.
Don't shuffle the cards. I'll be right back.
- Hey, you can't do that to me.
- Hello again.
- Do what?
- Disappear.
You and I meeting tonight was
no accident. The gypsies sent you.
Gypsies? Who believes in them?
I do. A fortune-teller told me a gorgeous
redhead would come into my life,
the luckiest thing
that ever happened to me.
- I'm a gorgeous rabbit's foot?
- You don't know how badly I need you.
- Tell me more.
- Oh, hello, Boss.
- I finally found my good-luck charm.
- Did you, now?
I'll break every casino on the river
before I'm through.
You're through now.
Didn't you tell him who you are?
- I don't even know who he is.
- Allow me.
Johnny... my number one girl, Nellie Bly.
How about that?
She means a lot to both of us.
She's private stock -
all 120 pounds of her.
Weren't you due on stage
five minutes ago?
Ten.
- Forget it, Nellie. He's spoken for.
- Yes, but I'm not.
To show you how worried I am,
let's go hear lover boy sing.
# Wise men have known
women can't live alone
# So a woman should understand
# That what every woman lives for
# What every woman lives for
# Is to give her love to a man
# He may not be the kind
you find in picture books
# A real-life hero
with dashing handsome looks
# He may not be the guy
that you've been dreaming of
# But that won't stop you
from giving him your love
# So, dear, can't you see
that it was meant to be?
# It's part... part of our destiny
# Cos what every woman lives for
# What every woman lives for
# Is to give her love to a man
# And I hope that man is me
Hey! Johnny likes her.
Maybe it'll be one big happy triangle,
and I'll come out on the right side!
What is this? You wouldn't talk to me
last night and won't today. What did I do?
Who smiled at Nellie Bly last night
like she was the only girl in the world?
Who is she?
- D'you really wanna know?
- I really wanna know.
- Where do you think I got this?
- You robbed a bank.
- 700 dollars, and I owe it all to her.
- You owe it all to me.
I got nothin' but admiration
for a man who pays his debts.
Now we're even,
give or take a few dollars.
- When I win, I lose.
- Who hates you up there?
If you see her again - and my advice is:
Don't - thank Nellie Bly for me.
Somebody page me?
Anybody I haven't met yet, I'm Nellie Bly.
I'm Mitzi. Last week's kisses.
You might
get him back on the rebound.
Rebound?
I'm the original rubber ball.
- Looks like Mitzi's got her hands full.
- Looks like you have.
- Hello, everybody.
- Hello.
- I hear you wrote a new number.
- It's the one I told you about.
Frankie, this is Nellie.
Shake hands and come out fighting.
- I just might do that.
- Your claws are showing.
And they scratch.
- I hear you're Braden's girl, off and on.
- I'm nobody's girl.
Let's keep it that way.
Could we stop wasting time
and rehearse?
- You written lots of hits?
- A trunkful.
- Wait till Joe hears this one.
- Joe the deck hand?
Joe Wilbur, the music publisher
from New York. He'll be here next week.
It's money in the bank if he likes it.
Money you can keep.
- For how long?
- We own half the song.
On account of the title
- "Frankie and Johnny".
At least the billing is right.
Let's hear it, Stephen Foster.
# Frankie and Johnny were lovers
# Oh Lordy, how they could love
Uh... just play it.
# Frankie and Johnny were lovers
Time they got married.
# Oh Lordy, how they could love
Blabbermouth.
# Swore to be true to each other
# This story has no moral
# Hmmm
# This story has no end
# Hmmm
# This story only goes to show
# That there ain't no good in men
# They'll do you wrong
# Yes, they'll do you wrong
# Frankie and me, we are lovers
# Oh Lordy, how we can love
# Swore to be true to each other
# Just as true as stars above
# Frankie, I'm your man
# I'll never do you wrong
# I knew that I was a winner
# When a new gal caught my eye
# But I couldn't two-time Frankie
# For that chick named Nellie Bly
# I'm Frankie's man
# I wouldn't do her wrong
# Baby, leave me here to gamble
# I'll be home before dawn
# Don't wait up for me, honey
# And don't you worry while I'm gone
# Johnny, you're my man
# Now, don't you do me wrong
# Johnny, he wasn't too lucky
# He was a loser that night
# So he tried to change his luck
# With a gal who wasn't right
# He's Frankie's man
# But he's doin' her wrong
# Frankie,
I don't wanna make you no trouble
# Honey, I don't wanna tell you no lie
# But...
# I saw your sweet man, Johnny
# He was messin' round
with that Nellie Bly
# Well, if he's your man
# Then he's doin' you wrong
# Frankie went back to find Johnny
# But she wasn't lookin' for fun
# In her sweet, dainty little hand
# She was totin' a 44 gun
# To shoot her man
# Cos he was doin' her wrong
# Frankie looked into the barroom
# And right there, in front of her eyes
# There was her sweet man, Johnny
# Making love to that Nellie Bly
# He was her man
# She caught him doin' her wrong
Johnny?
# Frankie, I beg you, don't shoot me
# They'll put you away in a cell
# They'll put you
where the cold wind blows
# From the hottest corner of hell
# Johnny, you're my man
# But you're doin' me wrong
- Mr Wilbur...
- Shh.
# He was her man
# But he done her wrong
- Did I write a hit, Mr Wilbur?
- You know what's good about this song?
- The words?
- The music?
No. Them.
You ought to be on Broadway.
You didn't like the song?
It's fine for their act.
I might even publish it.
But a hit? I know one when I hear it.
You're just saying that because
you don't want to give us an advance.
- Shut up, sweetheart.
- No advance, no song.
- Back in the trunk it goes.
- Nobody pushes me around. Forget it.
- How big an advance?
- Talk to my business manager.
Well, now, Mr Wilbur! Um...
- $300 and the song is yours.
- $100.
- Oh. Let's just split the difference. $250.
- Let's not quibble about it. $200 it is.
- Were you serious about Frankie and me?
- I've seen better, but not very often.
- Isn't Johnny great?
- Isn't she wonderful?
All you need is new costumes, new
arrangements and new special material.
Here's my card.
- Look me up when you get to New York.
- Thank you, Mr Wilbur.
- We're on our way!
- Goodbye, riverboat! Hello, Broadway!
# We never got discouraged
# We never had a doubt
# Cos sooner or later
# Talent must win out
# Look out, Broadway, we're comin' fast
# Now we're gonna see
our names in lights at last
# No more hot dogs at Sloppy Joe's
# We're gonna dine on steak and wine
at Delmonico's
# Rich or poor, it's great to have dough
# That's one thing we know
# Lots of fun, lots of laughs
# Signing cheques and contracts
and autographs
# We're off for N-e-w Y-o-r-k
# Look out, look out, Broadway
# I wanna see all the hustle and bustle
# Maybe I can get a date
with Lillian Russell
# I want to go out with Diamond Jim
# Yeah, if he gives you a diamond
what will you give to him?
# Blow the trumpets and beat on the drum
# Big town, here we come
# No more cheap hotels
and one-night stands
# We'll knock Tin Pan Alley
flat on its pan
# They'll see that we've got class
with a capital K
# Look out, look out, Broadway
Look out!
All we need is enough money
to get to New York - a lot more than 200.
- Don't look at me.
- OK.
I'll win it in the casino
with a beautiful redhead beside me.
- If you mean Nellie...
- Nellie who?
Just remember this:
If she's in, I'm out. Good night!
You would've hated New York anyway.
We'll get there.
Peg? Our half?
Frankie's half of our half.
Where's my half of our half?
- Guess.
- What am I, a memory expert?
I got a brand-new rabbit's foot,
a horseshoe from a Derby winner...
and the lucky cricket Frankie gave me.
Now all you need is a new lucky redhead,
and I know the perfect spot to find one.
Blonde.
Another blonde.
Brunette.
Blonde.
Heaven only knows.
Brunette.
Your guess is as good as mine.
Looks like somebody cornered the market
on redheads. Let's give up for tonight.
With this money burning
a hole in my pocket? Nah.
- We could trap a blonde and dye her red.
- I'm waitin' here for the real thing.
Jackpot.
Watch the old master go to work.
- Hello, Eloise!
- Hello, Charlie!
Wait a minute.
You're not Charlie. You're Jack!
- That's right, Eloise!
- Eloise? I thought you said Abigail.
Pardon me, "old master".
Are you alone, Abigail?
Practically. Boyfriend passed out
about an hour ago. Can't hold his liquor.
And he's letting a lovely lady like you
drift around by her little old lonesome?
Who's lonesome? I got you two.
Whoops.
She's no gentleman.
- Here we go!
- Place your bets.
- What number do you like?
- 13. That's my lucky number.
On account of I got 13 letters in my name.
A- b-i-g-a-i-I. 13.
Lady, you could stand
a few lessons in arithmetic.
- Does it have to be 13?
- If you don't bet 13, I'll cry.
No more bets!
13, black!
- Whee! Yippee!
- You did it! You did it!
- What number do you like now?
- 13! I like 13!
- Again?
- 13. Bet it all.
Let it ride on 13.
13!
- That gypsy knew something!
- Didn't I tell you?
Let it ride! Let it ride!
- Bet it all.
- All of it?
- You can't hit 13 three times in a row.
- Don't tell me you're a cheapskate?
The lady said let it ride. OK?
The limit's off.
- All of it goes on 13.
- No, no, no, no, no!
On 31.
- Don't you mean 13?
- I don't like 13 any more. I am fickle.
All right. All of it on 31.
He could use a little help.
The winner - 13!
Abigail, don't just lie there.
Say something.
Who moved the table?
Frankie? Did I wake you?
That's pretty sad music.
Sad? It's a dirge.
I almost won five thousand dollars.
Five thousand?!
Why didn't you quit
when you were ahead?
- Ask me an easier question.
- All right, I will.
Why do I have to love a riverboat singer
whose life is one great big roulette wheel?
Don't you ever win?
That's two questions.
But I can only answer the second.
# I wave no magic wand
# I own no lucky charms
# How then can I explain
# An angel in my arms?
# Must be beginner's luck
# What else can it be
# When someone
wonderful as you loves me?
# I wave no magic wand
# I own no lucky charms
# How then can I explain
# An angel in my arms?
# Must be beginner's luck
# What else can it be
# When someone
wonderful as you loves me?
Aren't you rehearsing?
We're an hour from New Orleans.
And less than 24 hours from being rich.
I'm dead broke. Peg went through
my pants last night - with me in 'em!
- I don't need any money from you.
- You don't?
Braden gave me an advance.
If I can just get Nellie to meet me...
- Nellie?
- She's the right redhead, Cully.
- I can win with her.
- You can get your head broken.
Frankie and I belong in the big time.
Frankie told you to keep away from Nellie.
Just one hot spin of the wheel
is all I need, with Nellie beside me.
I'll come visit you in the hospital.
# Down by the riverside
# Down by the riverside
# We'll hear them play and keep that beat
# Down by the riverside
# Down by the riverside
# Down by the riverside
# Let's get together, what a treat
# Down by the riverside
# Down by the riverside
# Strike up the band
# Start the parade
# Don't let that grand old rhythm fade
# Just play that drum, play that number
# When the saints come marchin' in
# Shake tambourines
# Play that cornet
# That trumpet horn you won't forget
# Your heart will hum to that number
# When the saints come marchin' in
# The cymbals clang
# Just pound that beat
# Sounds like a hundred marching feet
# It's fun to join in that number
# When the saints come marchin' in
# See banners wave
# Oh, hear that ring
# We all feel prouder than a king
# Cos everyone,
everyone loves that number
# When the saints come marchin' in
I don't know about you, but I killed 'em.
- The audience loves us.
- What's not to love?
See you at the Colonial House. Peg and I
have to pick out our costumes for the ball.
- What are you going as?
- Lady Godiva. What else?
Lady Godiva?!
That sure ain't fair to New Orleans.
Let's hope she gets a long wig.
Ah!
You're sure there'll be nobody
at the ball dressed like me?
Madam, in my shop we specialise
in one-of-a-kind costumes.
Let's face it - you're adorable!
How can any man resist you?
My problem is just the other way around.
Allow me, my dear.
Thank you.
Little Bo Peep has lost her sheep.
I don't blame 'em for running away.
How do I look?
Oh, honey! If I were Louis XV,
I'd make you queen.
Well, I'll get our clothes.
Ah-ha-ha!
Are you sure I'll be the only
Madam Pompadour at the ball?
My dear lady, this is a one-of-a-kind
costume that I imported from Paris.
Well, Little Bo Peep
is ready for action. OK?
Ah, charming! What Madam Pompadour
would have given to look like you.
Her head. Or was that Marie Antoinette?
Is this a good night
to go out with the wrong man
so the right man'll ask me to marry him?
Well, for that, any night is the right night.
Especially on Mardi Gras night.
Harry, give me a hand. We still have
ten Madam Pompadours to get rid of.
Guess who.
Nellie? I thought
you'd changed your mind.
Nellie?! Why, Johnny, you...!
Frankie, I... I knew it was you.
I was trying to make you jealous.
- Convinced?
- That was a guilty kiss if I ever had one.
- Let's go.
- Go where?
You know Braden's holding open house
in suite 309. Come on.
- I promised to wait here for Cully.
- Cully and who else?
Just Cully. I swear.
With the left hand?
All right, I'll meet you there. Suite 309.
Frankie?
Remember how to do that
after we get married.
Well, I fooled her.
Watch it! I'm not gettin' any younger.
- Did you find Nellie?
- Braden set her up in room 306.
She said to meet her there.
Can't I talk you out of this?
Not a chance. Go up to 309
and keep Frankie busy.
I promised to do a number with the band.
Last year's model.
# Everybody, listen to me
# Put a smile on your face
# There's no reason to be gloomy
# This world's a wonderful place
# So let me sing, get happy
# Shout it out
# Yeah, get happy now
# Shout it out
# Well, now, there is no doubt
you've a lot to shout about
# Give a yell, life is swell, shout it out
# While there's good food you can taste
# While there's music, life's no waste
# While there's great things happening
# There's no end to the joy life can bring
# I said come on, get happy
# Shout it out
# Yeah, get happy now
# Shout it out
# Well, now, there is no doubt
you've a lot to shout about
# Give a yell, life is swell, shout it out
# As long as there's someone
you can love
# As long as bright stars shine above
# You've got no reason to be blue
# Think what it means
when your dreams all come true
# I said come on, get happy
# Shout it out
# Yeah, get happy now
# Shout it out
# Well, now, there is no doubt
you've a lot to shout about
# Give a yell, life is swell, shout it out
# I said, now, there is no doubt
you've a lot to shout about
# Give a yell, life is swell, shout it out
# There is no doubt
you've a lot to shout about
# Give a yell, life is swell, shout it out
# Shout it out
Respect. Respect for Father Time!
- Frankie! Where are you going?
- Frankie? It's me.
- Mitzi!
- Oh!
- Nobody loves me.
- I love you.
- You're dressed just like Frankie.
- That's why I'm leaving.
I caught Braden kissing me when
he thought he was kissing Frankie. Hmph!
I hate Nellie, but I'm gonna
tell her what's goin' on.
- Why tell her?
- I want her to be as miserable as I am.
Happy... happy...
whatever it is we're celebrating.
- That calls for a kiss.
- Go away, old man.
Old man?! It's me!
Go away, old man.
Happy... happy...
- How about a kiss for the boss?
- Remember? I'm Johnny's girl.
- Johnny? Where do you suppose he is?
- Where do you suppose Nellie is?
Hello, everyone. It's me - Cully.
- Hey! You and Mitzi are wearing...
- I thought you were meeting Johnny.
- Where is he?
- Singing. Singing with the band.
He never sounded better. His vibrato...
His vibrato had better not be
in Nellie's room.
- Where is it?
- Right down the hall. 306.
Let you know if we're both wrong.
Hold it, pedal pusher.
- Where is Johnny, really?
- Not with Nellie, if that's what you think.
- That's what he thinks.
- Shut up, Blackie.
I didn't open my mouth.
Would Nellie two-time you?
Would Johnny? They'd be crazy!
Fill it up, Blackie.
Come in, Johnny! Be right with you!
Get up!
- Who are you?
- You know darn well who I am!
Hey! You'll never believe it,
but you and me and Nellie are triplets!
Mitzi!
What are you doing here?
First you gotta tell me where I am.
Well!
As one Madam Pompadour to the other...
Why did you say "Come in, Johnny"
when I knocked?
Because I was expecting him.
Any objections?
If I start to pull your hair out,
I'm not going to stop at your wig!
Johnny thinks I'm his Lady Luck. He just
wants me to go to the casino with him.
What else does he have in mind?
Well, that depends on
how much he wins...
or how much I want to lose.
Attention! I want attention, please!
Wouldn't it be funny
if Johnny made love to me
when he thought
he was making love to Nellie,
only it turned out to be you!
- She's not as dumb as she looks.
- Five'll get you ten.
No, wait a minute. She has a great idea.
Put on your mask.
What do you have in mind?
A little masquerade.
But first, what's the real reason
you're going out with Johnny?
- To come between us?
- Of course not. To make Braden jealous.
Jealous enough to ask me to marry him.
- You really love him!
- As much as you love Johnny.
Good. Now, let's hear you say:
Johnny, do you suppose I could
come between you and Frankie?
Johnny, do you suppose
I could come between you and Frankie?
Johnny, do you suppose I could
come between you and Frankie?
- That's amazing!
- And convincing?
You sound more like me than I do!
Now walk.
You've got to be born
with that. But I'll try.
That's good!
Nellie?
- Nellie?
- Come in, darling!
- Sorry I'm late.
- I'll be with you in a minute.
I have to get a handkerchief.
Tonight's the night. I can feel it.
That roulette wheel's gonna light up.
- So will Frankie if she finds out about it.
- Oh, she'd kill me.
Yes, she would. Just like in the song.
Ready or not, here I come!
We'll live it up tonight!
- Now we'll prove the gypsy was right.
- We'll do more than that, won't we?
You're for me, Nellie, all the way.
Nellie! Nellie, where are you goin'?
Nobody'll talk to me any more.
I've been abandoned.
- But Johnny isn't with Nellie. I told you.
- Then why wasn't she at my party?
- Don't go bruisin' your knuckles, Boss.
- I don't need any nursemaids.
Who's there? Identify yourself.
Mitzi?
Come in, honey!
What are you doing here? Where's Nellie?
I'm here because I'm here...
alone... by the world forgot.
I said, where's Nellie?
Her? Oh, she went out with Johnny.
I knew I was right.
She's cheating on you,
he's cheating on Frankie...
Why don't you cheat on somebody?
I have been taken.
I haven't!
- Well, two can play that little game.
- Two like me and you?
I just love games!
Welcome home.
Watch the wig! It's rented!
- Who was that?
- Must've been Frankie.
- What was she doing here?
- How should I know? It's not my room.
- You worried about Braden?
- You worried about Frankie?
What she doesn't know
won't hurt her, will it?
Chips, please. Lucky ones.
You stand right over here,
where you were before. That's it.
Frankie's cricket, for insurance.
How can I lose?
Got my lucky girl with me.
- What number do you like?
- Two. Like in Frankie and you.
Why not? It rhymes.
Spin it real pretty.
- A winner. Two, black.
- How about that! I can't miss with you!
- Pick another number and we'll be rich.
- How about playing your age? Five.
- Five it is. Who wants to grow up?
- You're over the limit, sir.
Then raise it.
- The limit's off, sir.
- So is your hand.
- My hand?
- Off the magnet button.
- Or shall I say it loud and clear?
- We run an honest wheel.
The two of us are gonna see to that.
- Place your bets, ladies and gentlemen.
- Don't be chintzy. Bet it all.
- On the five?
- And cover all the corners.
- You really know the game.
- I used to go with a gambler.
I'll surround that five so it can't get away.
Broke again, but just for a minute.
"We run an honest game," remember?
- Five.
- Cash me in, will you?
- $10,000. Didn't I tell you we'd do it?
- Yes, you did.
From now on, it's me and you, Nellie,
in every casino.
Are you with me?
Why not?
It can't be. No two women kiss alike.
"It can't be" is right! "From now on,
it's you and me, Nellie. Are you with me?"
Well, maybe she is, but I'm not!
- What happened?
- He won and I lost.
And it's just the way I want it!
We're all washed up!
- I don't believe you.
- No? Have a ball.
I might just be in the mood.
- You sure murdered 'em tonight.
- Yeah, right through the heart.
Frankie! You came back.
Nellie! What are you doing here?
Maybe the gypsy was right.
Maybe we were meant for each other.
Gee, it's great to be number one again.
Hold the thought.
What about your plan
to make Braden jealous?
It backfired. He switched to Mitzi...
so I'm switching to you.
- I could do worse.
- I doubt it.
You're still a loser, winner.
I owe you seven weeks' salary, plus...
Oh!
It was only champagne, honey.
He's all yours, Mitzi. What's left of him.
- Back to 306?
- No. Back to Frankie, if she'll have me.
Gypsy or no gypsy.
Well! Alone at last.
OK, so I got the money
for Broadway. So what?
- You sure Frankie walked out on you?
- I can still feel her farewell message.
- Sorry to interrupt the party.
- Frankie!
Look!
Look. This is our big-time bankroll.
- We got it made!
- "We"?
Sure. The gypsy was wrong.
I don't need a redhead. I need you.
You're my Lady Luck.
You're the family banker.
You know what I think of this money,
or any gambling money?
I'll show you.
You wouldn't!
You would.
Money! Fifty-dollar bills!
Lady, you won't believe it,
but some nut's throwin' his money away!
I believe it.
Giddap. Come on.
- How disgusting!
- Money! Dropping out of the clouds!
Money?! Let me in there!
Get out of my way! Let me in there!
Hey, folks! Folks?
- The money flying out of that window...
- Money? What money?
- I accidentally dropped it.
- I didn't see any money. Did you?
No!
I don't guess you did, did you?
Hey, kid. Did you see the money
flying out the window up there?
- No, sir. I didn't see any money.
- OK.
- Got change for a fifty, mister?
- No, I ain't got change for one.
# Oh, I'm really feelin' mighty low
# No, no, no
# I got no place that I can go
# So I got some blues to sing
# And oh, so much remembering, woe
# Black cats, keep away from me
# Take my advice
# Go shinny up a tree
# I've got hard luck
# The hardest kind of luck you'll find
# I ain't lyin'
# I've got the bluest kind of blues
# And it's drivin' me right out of my mind
# She's gone
# Said toodle-oo
# I kissed her goodbye, and my money too
# I've got hard luck
# The hardest kind of luck you've seen
# I mean
# The way I'm runnin' lately
# My lucky number is thirteen
# Where do I belong?
# Everything I do is wrong
# All wrong
# Wrong as can be
# Who's stackin' all the decks?
# Lady Luck has got the hex on me
# Permanently
# Shove off
# Boy, I'm warnin' you
# This thing I caught, you know,
could be catchin' too
# I've got hard luck
# The hardest kind of luck there can be
# Yes, siree
# I guess hard luck always chooses
# Natural-born losers like me
How long have we been drinking?
Since last night.
How's your head? The one
I opened the champagne bottle on.
You really launched me.
But you did knock some sense into it.
You found out that
it's really me that you go for?
No! It's Nellie.
But Nellie went bye-bye!
How could she run out on me...
with Johnny Nothing?
Women! Whoever invented them?
Come in!
- Did you find 'em?
- Couldn't find 'em anywhere.
- I turned New Orleans upside down.
- How does it look that way?
You want me to throw her out?
It's no bother.
Two more drinks and she'll float out.
Looks like no Johnny, no Frankie,
no Nellie.
But you've still got me.
Charming, lovable, talented Mitzi.
The girl with a past...
and no future.
You should've done
what my father did to my mother.
- What was that?
- Marry her.
You should've married Nellie Bly.
Maybe. But I hated to spoil
such a beautiful friendship.
What a world. Everybody's split up.
You and Nellie, Frankie and Johnny,
me and...
and anybody.
If anybody cares, I'm back, and I'm sorry.
Nobody cares.
# Please don't stop loving me
# You were born just to be
# In my arms
# In my arms
# Please don't stop loving me
# Your lips were made just to be
# Kissed by me
# Kissed by me
# When I'm with you
# I don't know
# Day from night
# Wrong from right
# You're my world
# That's all I know
# I love you so
# I won't let go
# Please don't stop loving me
# Darling, you'll always be
# Mine alone
# Mine alone
- Who is it?
- Frankie.
I'm sorry Johnny and I
missed the show last night.
- What about tonight?
- You've still got the show for two months.
But only because
you paid Johnny in advance.
Can I count on two months?
If I don't shoot him for real
in the "Frankie and Johnny" number.
Hey, there's a thought!
Come on, Mitzi. We got an act to do.
I love him. He loves Nellie.
There never should've been two sexes.
Hey, Boss. Wouldn't it be nice
if Frankie shot Johnny, like she said?
No such luck.
No. I've got enough nerve now.
Before I do it,
- would you tell me something, Pete?
- Before you do what?
Can a gal get away with shootin' her guy?
- What girl? What guy?
- You don't follow too good.
This is him.
This is her.
Her shoots him
for two-timin' her with her.
Now, does her get away with it?
Or does her...
get it in the neck?
I'd say not guilty,
but of course I ain't no judge.
Thanks, Pete. You're a real pal.
Do you think a girl
should believe a man like Johnny?
No woman should ever believe any man,
but we always do.
- Are you ready to forgive him?
- Not a chance!
Frankie, honey.
Yes, Johnny, dear?
Remember, in a situation like this,
always do the honest thing: Lie.
- It's me, the reformed gambler.
- Come in, reformed gambler.
She's playing hard to get.
You missed me.
The kid's got a great arm.
Hey, Eddie.
Do you think a girl
could get away with murder
just because she's beautiful
and got nice legs?
Not if I was on the jury.
She'd have to have a nice figure too.
Like Frankie's? Is that what you mean?
If my wife had a face, legs and figure like
Frankie, I'd give up work and stay home.
Frankie says you've been
hitting the bottle over me.
- Was she telling the truth?
- Nellie!
- You are just in time.
- Just in time for what?
I wanna propose a merger.
A merger like two companies...
or a merger like two people?
A merger like marriage.
- How about it?
- Ask me again after the show.
I want to play hard to get, for a change.
I forgot Frankie's gun.
All right, folks,
here we go. On stage.
- Frankie, you gotta forgive me.
- Why?
- Because Johnny loves Frankie.
- Well, I'll tell her if I see her.
# This story has no moral
# Hmmm
# This story has no end
# Hmmm
# This story only goes to show
# That there ain't no good in men
# They'll do you wrong
# Yes, they'll do you wrong
# Frankie and me, we are lovers
# Oh Lordy, how we can love
# Swore to be true to each other
# Just as true as stars above
# Frankie, I'm your man
# I'll never do you wrong
# Johnny, he wasn't too lucky
# He was a loser that night
# So he tried to change his luck
# With a gal who wasn't right
# He's Frankie's man
# But he's doin' her wrong
# Frankie,
I don't wanna make you no trouble
# Honey, I don't wanna tell you no lie
# But...
# I saw your sweet man, Johnny
# He was messin' round
with that Nellie Bly
# Well, if he's your man
# Then he's doin' you wrong
# Frankie went back to find Johnny
# But she wasn't lookin' for fun
# In her sweet, dainty little hand
# She was totin' a 44 gun
# To shoot her man
# Cos he was doin' her wrong
Blackie, who do you know
who can marry us right away?
- You and who?
- Nellie and me.
Johnny Nothing
was really nothing in her life.
How about that! Hey, Boss,
things are workin' out just like you...
What's wrong?
I was only doin'
what I thought you wanted me to do.
What are you trying to say?
You know the blank cartridge
Frankie shoots Johnny with?
What about it?
It ain't blank. I put in a real bullet.
Frankie is gonna shoot Johnny dead.
You stupid...
- Sorry!
- What's the matter with him?
# He was her man
# She caught him doin' her wrong
Johnny?
# Frankie, I beg you, don't shoot me
# They'll put you away in a cell
# They'll put you
where the cold wind blows
# From the hottest corner of hell
# Johnny, you're my man
# But you're doin' me wrong
Don't shoot!
- Close the curtain!
- What's the matter, Mr Braden?
That was a real bullet.
Johnny, don't die!
Please don't die! I love you!
You can gamble all you want!
- You really mean that?
- I want you any way you are.
Baby, you got me.
But that gun was really loaded.
I did feel something.
Looks like a bullet dent.
But who put the bullet in the gun?
Let's just say a misguided friend.
I'm asking again:
Do you wanna get married?
What have I got to lose?
I think I'll give him the air.
# Everybody come aboard
the showboat tonight
# We're gonna dance till the morning light
# We'll have fun the whole night long
There'll be jokes and song
# Forget your troubles, forget your strife
# You'll have the best time of your life
# Hey, everyone, let's go on with the show
# Way down by the levee
# The boat's at the bank
# Bring money to spend, you're welcome,
my friend, just walk up the plank
# Everybody, come aboard
the showboat tonight
# Look around at the happy sight
# We'll guarantee that you'll have a ball
Come one and all
# What a great night you've got in store
# You'll wanna keep coming back for more
# Hey, everyone, let's go on with the show
# What a great night you've got in store
# I'll bet you'll wanna
keep coming back for more
# Hey, everyone, let's go on with the show