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Getting Schooled (2017)
Well hello, little lady.
Lemme guess. Detention, right? Yeah. Totally bogus. Um... I've-I've gotta pee really bad. Kids today. I used to love detention. Pick up chicks. Some of them had to pee also. Someone stayed up too late watching MTV. I got places to be. Not. Like where? Take a bath? Hold that, Princess. Stop it, stop it, stop it! Ouch! Gag me! Oh, my god. Who's that, y'all? Who are you? Call me Mr. Roker, tough guy. Everybody sit. Boy, girl, boy, girl. And girl. Close the door. Mike swank? Yeah? Just say "here", meathead. Here. Hillary Miller. As if! Here. Rusty Boone? Yo. - Shelly Hinson. - Here, sir. Julie Moore. Aren't we a fine looking bunch? From the looks of you, I imagine you already know the rules. No talking, keep to yourselves, and no one, and I mean no one, leaves this room without my permission. I can do this standing on my head, man. Don't make me have you prove it, son. You ladies enjoy... and I'll be back in a bit to check on you. How's it going, Princess? Ugh, gross me out! Why don't you just leave her alone? Mm-hmm. That's what I thought. Because you don't mess with the bionic man. Loser. Retard. Dork. Homo. Ooh. Bet she'd do me if I put her in the school play. What's this world comin' to? So what's your story, Princess? Story? Yeah... like, your story. I think the burnout means why are you here? I'll tell you mine if everyone else tells theirs. Come on. What's your damage? Maybe I don't like handing out my dirty laundry to strangers. Aw, come on, we're all friends here in detention. Yeah, just like a championship team. Come on, as if it's that personal. Get real. Okay. You go first. Okay, so, me and my gal pal Brittany were, like, totally going to Blaze out of class and stand in line for R.E.O. Speedwagon tickets... Flamers! Uh, r.E.O. Is totally proper! Anyway... We got busted by that science guy pulling out of the lot. Totally lame-o. Can you relate? I can relate to what boner smokers those guys are. R.E.O. Homowagon. What about you, four-eyes? My name is Shelly. - Ooh. - Okay. Let's just say I had a little run-in with someone who was... Touching my property. Property? Like, they touched you where you pee? Sorry. Don't have a heart attack. Will you just let her talk? What was it? My Rubik's cube. Whoa! Those are so... zeeked. Huh? Bunk? Ill? Mung? Uncool. Not more uncool than R.E.O. Whateverwagon. Wait. So you raged on some scumbag for touching your blocks? It's Hillary, right? Mm-hmm. Go shut the door. Ugh! Where'd you go? Get your tires rotated? Stupid. So you're a real go-getter, huh? You gonna roll me over to the office, Mr. Roboto? No... but I am gonna roll all over you. Shut up, Geekette! Don't you people have anything better to do on a Saturday morning than sit here with a cripple? Don't you have friends? The freak doesn't. Meet the only friend I need, Jocko. Bring me the knife, Mr. Boone. Why don't you come over here and get it? Ugh. I hope you brought a spare tire. Seeing that you all have an obvious learning disability, I'll write the rules on the board. Oh! It hit him right in the face! Yes! Dumbass. - Oh, my god. - Mister? Mr. Roker, are you okay? Mister? Oh, shit. Is he breathing? Mr. Roker? Shit. I think I hear him breathing. It's actually more of a wheeze than... Shit! - Sh... - You tried to kill me! You gook bastards! No! Let him go! No! Killer! Damnit, I'm not touching him! Rusty! Let him go! She just hit him! Thanks a lot, Bimbette. I don't wanna touch you, dweeb! We got trouble. He's got trouble for sure. You think they're gonna believe us, or a teacher in a wheelchair? They? What do you mean by they? Police. Parents. Society? We just assaulted a teacher as far as they're concerned. He said we tried to kill him. No, you assaulted the teacher. You tried to kill him! And we watched, asshole! It's called being an ass-cessory, joystick. I'm not gonna get busted for this. This is hellacious. My dad... will kill me for real if this messes with me starting the next game. Don't have a cow. Let's tie him up. What? What? We can talk to him when he catches snap. Uh... He tried to friggin' kill me. It's a fantastic idea. Where are we gonna get rope from? Fine, okay... Yeah. They're boys, they can do the rope stuff. I don't... it's not... I'm just the idea person. Well, I was a girl scout. Let's go Jocko, get some rope. So... What do we do now? Wait until he wakes up. Reason with him. Did you hear that major crazy shit he was talking? Man, we're all in more trouble than I wanna even think about. Hell, I'm not even supposed to be here. I'm the good kid. I ought to be home working on my science project. Uh, just say no. I should be out buying my prom dress. Instead I'm stuck here with you posers. Can it, miss America. Everybody had something better to do today. I could be out busting heads on the field. I could be home right now. What would you be doing? Crimes. What was he yelling about, anyway? Probably gibberish. I think part of it was Vietnamese. How the hell would you know? Uh, whatever. What's he doing in that wheelchair anyway? Ladies! Come on! We need to figure out what to do before he wakes up. Uh... too late. Uh... hi. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. It's just that... Do you remember what happened? Shelly's gonna take a look at you. I don't want to. Do it... or I'll call the police myself. Okay, don't have a cow. Just give me two seconds. What the hell are you doing? Hey! Hey! Just go! Shelly! I'm gathering my chi. If I watch this am I gonna be a flamer? Yeah. Fuckin' do it already! - Okay. - Come on! Do it! It's a little bruised. You have to press around it. Gag me. Do you wanna do it? Are you okay? It hurts further back. Be careful. Further back. Oh, barf me out! What is wrong with you?! Gross! You're a dick, man! - He bit me! - You're in time out, speed racer. Get the door. Move! Come on! It's like shark teeth. God, you're heavy. Shut up! Stupid kids. Ah, ouch. It hurts. Okay. So now we add taking a hostage to the list of offenses. Oh, it's "we" now? Yes, we. We... Let's just figure this out! I've been thinking about this. Oh, here we go. The men are talking. We need to make sure no one gets in here until we figure this shit out. We need to call the police. We are totally innocent. They're not gonna believe us! At least not until Mr. Roboto comes to his senses. What's your big idea, then? We gotta lock down the school. Lock it down? No one can see him. He's in the closet. What if somebody walks in and he starts shouting? What then, huh? I can't believe this, but... I agree with a kid that wears a leather jacket. Any volunteers? - Mm-mm. - All right. Jocko, I guess we... Uh... I'll take Julie with me. You just watch that door. Fine. Hey, why don't you come up here with me? I think he's gone insane. What are we gonna do? Follow the plan. Lock it down. Every door and window? That's impossible. Nothing's impossible. Man, you are a mess. You're so pretty. You think they know? They would never... I love you. I love you too. Aw, young love. Kinda takes me back to my youth. 'Scuse me. You guys have a hall pass? - We really have to go... - Yeah, we gotta go. Look, we just gotta go. That's all. Kids of today. You just wonder what's going through their minds. You know... Probably sex... more sex... sex again... Did I say sex? That's included: Sex. We can't let them catch on. Yeah, they'll rag us to death, but... I don't really care what anyone thinks. I do. You can't be seen with an outcast like me. What if your dad... You two look like you've been boinking. Ugh! Grotesque! Ha ha! Nobody's getting in here today. This place is locked down like my offensive line. Boo bam! - Ta-da! Mr Roker's wallet, anyone? Look what we have here. Mr. Roker's rsum. Mm... Couple of private security contract jobs. Hm. No teaching jobs. Fucking queer! Veteran card. Couple of tours in Vietnam I'll bet. That's where the gibberish came from. Gnarly. Know what that card is? He was in black ops! What does that mean? Oh, Jesus Christ. That means he's a bad, bad man. I wanna call my parents. What if we just tell him what we know? - Read it to him, outcast. - What? Why me? I think the sound of a woman's voice might rush the blood from his head to his... What? Uh, Mr. Roker, we know you were in the, um, black ops. You were also in Vietnam. Do you remember? Mr. Roker, do you remember this? You think he's dead? There's only one way to find out. We gotta open that door. Hey, hey, hang on a second! If he comes after us, man, I'm totally gonna sack him. Fuckin' a. Come on. Watch out, Princess. Ready? - Yeah, yeah. One... - Sorry. - One... two... three! Shit. - Where's the beef? - - Oh, my god, guys. What's wrong? What's it say? How did he climb up and into the ceiling? - What's it say? - - What's it say? "Game on. You die." Oh, my god. Is, uh... everything okay, there, mister, uh... - Roker. - Roker. Um... I'm, uh... watching detention. I-I don't feel so well. What's the matter, buddy? I'm not sure. I know... I threw up... I... wonder if I could borrow a mop. I got plenty of mops here, but... it's my job to clean up. I can see you're eating. Hey, I... I won't tell. Very considerate of you. Don't wanna take your job... but I will take your life! Little bubbly? Huh? Huh? Drink it down. There you go! I wanna go home! The pigs are gonna be all over me for this, and I ain't going down alone! I guess the mall maggot is going to sit there and bawl? Why don't you just leave her alone? I'm tired of you opening your mouth... - nobody was talking to you, outcast. - I'm talking to you. I'm not an outcast! - Why don't you turn your head... - I'm not gonna turn around. - ...And cut yourself a little bit, huh? It's none of your concern, so shut up! Oh, you don't talk all year and now you are gonna turn around and bitch at me? I'm gonna bitch at you all I want! Let's not be afraid. Fear is the mind killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. Just let her go with it, man. And when it has gone past, I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone... There will be nothing. Only I will remain! Wow. Righteous speech. I knew reading "dune" would come in handy at some point. Is that blood on your head? I don't think I can take it anymore. Take what anymore? War, you gook! You and your kind followed us for three days in the bush while we were trying to find the rest of our company. Listen! You are going to listen. We found evidence of 'em. Our provisions were running low. Some of the men turned to... You know what I mean! You commanded your... little yellow bastards to kill them, and... It all started when we ran across this... this little village... that had been napalmed hours before. For miles it was all anyone could talk about. That smell... It was enough to drive some of the... weaker mean insane. One of my men... rushed up... To a smoldering body... didn't hesitate for a second... After that it was a frenzy. I'm not finished... general. When we got back to base... some of the men were arrested. They were found cooking human flesh. Oh, I don't have to tell you... taste. It was in 'em... It was in 'em, all right. Like their conscience laid bare. I have walked through the valley of the shadow of death! And it smelled... delicious! You're gonna tell me where my men are, general... now. Let's hunt that mental fuck down. Yes! Yes! He wants blood? Let's give it to him, man. Fuck yes! Attention, students. All of you little brats are gonna pay. I'll be wearing your ears as a necklace before the final bell. That is all. Let's get out of here! Come on, come on, guys. No fake. We have to go... - hey, hey, hey! Chill out. All right? We just gotta make sure lieutenant lunatic doesn't get in here. We have to find something to block the doors. Duh! Let's go! Get the cabinet! Forget the cabinet! Move the trash can! That's never gonna hold, moron! Shut up! That has wheels, asshole! - Hit me again. - Get the goddamn... Hit me again, bro! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! How's that? Mega-touchdown! Just what we needed he-man! Ow... ow... Just kidding! You suck! How are we supposed to get out? As long as he can't get in, I don't give a shit about getting out. I am not your b.F.F. Ah! I can get it for you. I can get you all the money that you need. I don't care about those little brats. Just let me go. Let me go! Promises, promises! Hey! Could use a smoke. Hey, you can't smoke that in here. You have to go to the smoking area. Get real. I think that is the least of our problems. You smoke dicks, I smoke cigs. Ha! You want one? I want to get out of here. You've made that abundantly clear. Ooh, abundantly, huh? I could be like you... if I wanted to. Yeah, right. What's your score on your sats? A lot. I bet mine was higher. Bet you were just high when you took it. - He was. I was there. - Come on. Humor me. That's pretty good. Yes? So? Why don't you humor us? Bullshit! Bullshit, and I'm calling you out right now. Whatever. Ah! What are we betting? What? Nothing. How 'bout the Princess let's me French her? And if I win, you have to apologize to all of us for being rude! Yes! If you scored a 1500 on the sat, I'll let you bag me. No way! No way! Let me see that shit! Fuckin' a, dude! Are you serious? You want some gum, Princess? Damn! So, do you want some privacy, or...? Let's just get this over with. This is actually happening right now. You said anything I wanted. You're not a liar are you? - Fine. Texas thunder light would make this a lot easier. Yeah, let's get some privacy. - How is this happening? - Later days and better days, suckers! What?! What does that even mean? Oh, oh my god. Is it safe in here? Listen if you're scared... We don't have to do this. You think you're so bad to the bone. I think it's bogus. Preppy girls do it best. Say it. Prove it. This has been brewing a long time. Get real. Get bent. Just between us? Oh, yeah. Principals don't belong here on Saturday! That should bleed you out soon enough. Listen, this is a long time coming. To be continued? In your dreams. Tease. There's somethin' out there, man. Let's go check it out. Rusty, let's go! Shit, dude, you see that? Oh, shit! Oh, my god! Close it! Fuck dude! - Shit, shit. - That's janitor Dan! - Dude, that's fucked up, man! That guy was cool! Let's go tell the girls. Let's go. Okay, he is officially batshit to the Max! He butchered janitor Dan! My balls are in my throat, man, and that tells me we gotta get the shit out of here. Can we go home now? I'm with her! Let's bail! - Yes! - Guys, this is not a good idea! I have a very bad feeling about this. Guys! Let's stick together. God, please! Somebody help us! Hillary, you can't do this. We gotta chill and keep moving. Come on! It doesn't matter. We're all going to die anyway. We will if you don't get up off your ass! Oh, shit! Boogie! Guys! Damn! You're bohunk, man! We didn't do all this! Who, then? My guess is g.I. Joker. Hey, where's Julie? - Julie? - Julie! Where's Julie, man?! - Wait, wait! - Come back! Wait! No, no! Oh, god... Ah... How could we just leave her? I can't! I can't! I gotta go back! Mike! Ain't happening, bro. We gotta stick together. Nobody said "we", wuss! Wait, wait! Wait! No! We're sticking together. Fuck. Julie? Julie? Mike, I'm in here! Mike! Julie? So... here we are. Where is she? Wouldn't you like to know? Mike! Why don't you go see if she's okay?! Man, why don't you go fuck yourself? Aah! Soldiers today... No respect for the enemy! Oh! Oh! Oh! Where'd the tough guy go? Huh? Mike! Mike, I'm in here! Mike! Thank you, sir. May I have another? Mike! Mike! Are you okay? I see the breadcrumbs worked. Big ol' honkin' breadcrumbs. Come on let's get you outta here. - No! No, no, no! Somebody help! Somebody help me! Mike, please! Mike, I love you! Mike, please! Mike! Mike! Oh, my god! Why?! Why?! Why, why, why, why?! No guts, no glory! Right, little man?! You're not half bad, now! I'm sorry, Julie. Look the only way we're gonna getting out of here... is if we kill Roker. We-we know that right? We see what rushing away from the group gets us. He saved my life. And lost his. Look, we all have skills. We need to use them. You are smart. He's strong. Hillary is... well... Hillary is a gymnast, captain of the cheer squad and a black belt in tae Kwon do. What's your skill, Julie? My skills are bogus. All I know is we need to get the hell out of here... and the only way is over Mr. Roker's dead body. I am a cheerleader. I'm not gonna kill anyone! I'm gonna to call the police! The only phone is in the principal's office. What about the fire alarms, did you ever think of that? I didn't think so. Hillary, chill out, all right? We gotta wait. - Hillary! - Hillary! - Hillary! - Hillary! Hey! Hillary! Yo, rusty. We need a plan, okay? You've got one minute to plan before I go after her. You know this is crazy. I'd do it for you, too, Julie. You just can't go on a wing and a prayer. If that's all I got... It's righteous. Rusty! Rusty, no! Rusty! He's the only guy that really ever cared about me. I loved him so much. He wanted to tell everybody. That was the kind of guy he was. But if his dad ever found out he was dating someone like me, a freak, he would've killed him. And now he's dead and I have to go into the world and pretend like I never knew him. Like I never fucking knew him. Bite me! Gross me out! Ew. Oh, oh! Chuh, like, what am I, a hacker? Shelly will know how to use this. Ew. How did you get so far out in the back country? Hmm? You are so kirked out! What's a pretty little thing like you doing conniving with the enemy? You won't get all of us, you know. Somebody's gonna get out and when they do, you're going down. Oh. What's daddy's little girl gonna do now? Daddy's little girl is gonna party Hardy on your ass! Roker! Not bad for a squaw. You're messing with the spirit club now, loser. Ow! Gag me. Die, slant-eye. Hillary! Ah! Fuck! Hillary! Hillary! Where could she be? Hillary! I just can't let rusty be alone like that. Like me. S-stay here. Not a problem. I'll be back. No, no. No, no. You showed me something today that... I never knew existed. That son of a bitch! Rusty? He killed her. I wanna kill the fucker. Rusty, we have to go. That son of a bitch! Good bye, Hillary. I'll never forget. Preppy girls do it best. Rusty! We gotta go! Come on! Come on! Let's go! What happened? Hillary's dead. You know earlier, when... she was saying that she wanted to be out shopping for her prom dress? I thought "how typical... Princess wants to go shopping for a prom dress." Why do we do that? Why do we have these... misconceived ideas of one another? If this wouldn't have happened, then we wouldn't be talking like this. I don't want to be like that anymore. Me neither. So, how the hell do we kill the psycho? Any ideas? We have to find something to arm ourselves with. I got this. Julie... What do you got, Shelly? Uh... Let's go get this fucker. Let's go. Who goes there? Rusty? Julie? I said... who goes there?! Shh! Why didn't you answer me?! Shut the fuck up. We're supposed to keep our location secret, ass munch. Let go of my shirt. Well then stop being such a chicken shit! Deadweight. I'm not a chickenshit. Not even scared. Come on guys. We have to stick together or we're dead. Okay? Are we good? He needs to apologize for his last remark. All right, shit. You're not a deadweight. Hmm. And apologize for my shirt. All right. I'm sorry I messed up your shirt. I'm sure your grandpa would be mondo-pouty I wrinkled his shirt. Hey. Hey, Julie! Hey, Julie, where you going?! Julie, come back! I'm sorry! Rusty and I, we're-we're fine now. Look! We took a major chill pill, all right? This is how this is gonna go. You, stop with your whining and get on with your traps. And you, stop with your third grade crap and get onto that hallway and guard it. I'm gonna take the other end. If we don't stick together we're gonna be... frickin' road pizza by the end of the night. Shelly, you have fifteen minutes to come up with something spectacular. Amaze me. All right it's all clear. Oh shit! What is that? It's a compound I made using general household products, we should set it up in every hallway and if he tries to get us we can throw it on him. It'll neutralize him. All right cool, but we're gonna need more buckets to put at the end of each hallway. Hand me that rat poison. Go get those buckets. Hey, Shelly. Henderson... You're gonna be all right. It'll be okay. I just need to... take a look. What? Let's hunt this bastard down! Our best bet is to drive him into one of the traps. What? We'll have to split up to do that. She's right. We're gonna have to come at this asshole from all sides. It's do or die time, shel. Let's crush this fly! For Mike, for Hillary. Roker! Here, let me help you with that. Shh. Better run, Poindexter! I'll have your goddamn heart on a platter! Run! Test. Aah! That's better! I'm looking at you, little lady! Uh, this one goes out to all you spoiled little pieces of shit out there. New wave, baby! Don't be such a spaz! Whatever. Please... no. I'll do anything. You're not giving up now, are you? Bud?! We didn't do anything! Come on, soldier! There's no use crying about it now. Hey, slant-eye! On second thought... Let's jam. Oh, you little... bitch. Score! You really got your head in the game. Nighty night. You bitch! What did you throw on me?! Oh, god! Die! It's over? It's over. That's all it took? That's all it took?! That's all it took? That's all it took, asshole? That's all it took? That's all it took?! Oh, shit! I'm outta here, asshole! You need to watch your language, young lady. Hey! You're gonna end up with another detention next week! Attention, student. I'm coming for you. I can hear you, Julie. You crazy son of a bitch! What is wrong with you?! All we wanted to do was get out of here, but you wouldn't let us! And now I'm stuck here. Nowhere to run. Time to die, Julie. That is all. You know earlier, when... she was saying she wanted to be out shopping for her prom dress? I thought, "how typical... Princess wants to go shopping for a prom dress. Why do we do that? Why do we have these... misconceived ideas of one another? If this wouldn't have happened, then we wouldn't be talking like this. I don't wanna be like that anymore. I'm not gonna do this anymore. Julie! I smell you. I smell you! Where are you, you bitch? Huh? You're in my jungle now. Understand? I'm gonna fuckin' devour you. You dink bitch! What you did to me... That was mind control! Julie! Hear that?! It is the sound of nothing. No chopper's coming for you! You're in my jungle. My jungle! You don't get to outta here, bitch. Oh! Oh, my boyfriend Mike is dead! He cut him in half! That's nothing compared to what I'll do to you! I'm gonna end you. After what you did to me and my men! They were my men! Good men! I'm gonna wear your ears for a necklace. I've got some 556 for your fucking teeth... and then I'll devour them and shit 'em out... on your cold fucking corpse! You understand me?! You dink! I'm gonna take my blade... and I'm gonna bury it deep into you, you bitch... like I did to your boyfriend, Mike! Thieves, the dinks... I'm comin' for you! Shit. Oh, my god. Where?! I can't see. Where are you?! There you are, slant-eye! As if! Well, since we are up here... let's have a little lesson in gravity. Why are you doing this?! Get back here! For all my men lost to the likes of you! We're just kids! Scum! It's 1983! They're all gone now. I'm just a kid! Please! Please! Ong Thanh, loc ninh... dak to... Mekong delta, tam quan, thom tham Khe, Khe Sanh! They're all gone now. Ghosts! Please... Please! No, no, no! I live surrounded by ghosts! No! No! Help! Help me! Little girl? Please. No. I'm an American hero. Why did you do it? Why?! You tried to kill me. You are the enemies! We were just stupid kids! But you are right about one thing, Mr Roker. We are enemies now! And gravity... Is so righteous. No! Sometimes I can't help but imagine... what their lives might have been. Hillary... she would be a news anchor... or a rich socialite... helping the disadvantaged. Rusty? He'd probably be running around with the other hooligans... but then again... this might have changed him. I could see him turning a new leaf. Maybe becoming a cop. That would be ironic. Shelly? Who knows what amazing discoveries... she would have made. How the world will suffer without her. Mike. He'd be winning the big football game... and I'd be at the sideline cheering him on. We all would. Sometimes when it's quiet... and I'm all alone... I pretend that... we're married and that we have two children. Living... in a safe suburb somewhere. But that's all gone now. Look. That's the girl that lived through the murder spree. Wow. I can't believe she came to prom. Hey, back off, slick. Bogus. |
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