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Gidget (1959)
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She acts sort of teenage Just in-between age Looks about 4 foot 3 Although she's just Small fry Just about so-high Gidget is the one for me A regular tomboy But dressed for a prom Boy, how cute Can one gal be? Although she's not king size Her finger is ring size Gidget is the one for me If she says she loves you You can bet your boots She loves you If she says she hates you That can also mean She loves you It very well may be She's just a baby Speaking romantically If that's a bad feature I'll be the teacher That's the way It's going to be Gidget is the one for me This summer was the turning point in my life. For 16 years, I'd gone blindly along enjoying myself like a fool who never guesses what's in store for her. Then... Oh, Patti, please... Now, hear this, Francie Lawrence. The day, the hour, and the moment has arrived. Not for me, it hasn't. Aw, gee, Patti, last year and the year before, didn't we all have a ball? I mean, why can't we go on being like that always? Why do we have to spoil it all? Keep your shirts on. She's coming! Oh, be realistic, Francie. Now, ask yourself one vital question. To date, what has your life added up to? Okay, so you're an "A" student. That's parent stuff. Do you know anybody else it impresses? No, I guess not. And as for this king-size fiddle... It's probably a symptom of your whole problem. Well, I'll go get my gear. About her problem, exactly what would you say it is? Well, she's more fish than dish. To put it bluntly, the kid's studied up on about everything but sex, and let's face it, like most of us, she's pushing 17. Oh, not till next month. Oh, listen, B.L., you don't have to go. You've got social security just by wearing Buck's fraternity pin, but take it from me, Francie has got to make it this summer, or she'll be a social outcast. Oh! Oh, hi, Mrs. Lawrence. Oh, hello, girls. So long, Mom. Bye-bye, dear. Have a good time. Sure. Betty-Louise, do you think Francie didn't want to go? Oh, she's just a bit skittish. After all, this is her first manhunt. Her first what? Manhunt! Count them, girls. Six gorgeous hunks of male, almost enough for second helpings. Well, what's holding us up? Well, hey! We're, we're not just gonna barge in on them. Hardly. Please, a maneuver like this takes technique. Hey, check this swing, Lover Boy. That looks like your style. Francie... Peel, girl. Make like you can't see them for sand. We'll have them drooling. Hey, hotshot, check this one. Hubba, hubba, hubba. Hey, Red! Hello, Red! Oh, hey, look at this... Aw... Aw... Did you get the look that doll gave me? I swear it scorched my bathing suit half off. What are you trying to do, spoil the picture? Come on, get with it. This is supposed to co-op venture. My aching back. I wonder what's taking them so long. You know, something's screwy. Well, they're not even looking this way. Maybe they didn't notice us. Hey, remember? Ball! Okay, Babe Ruth, knock it off. Huh? Look, set her straight, will you, before she has us signed up with the major leagues. Hey, Moondoggie, you're not going for that jailbait caper, are you? Hey, kid. Do you see those girls over there? Tell them the man said to take the toy back the nursery. All right? The man said for me to take the toy back to the nursery. Well? Aw, come off it, kids. Those guys just aren't interested. So who needs them? Honey, maybe you need a few hormone shots. Well, if this is a manhunt, I'll take swimming. I'm going to get my gear. Well, let's call today a dry run. I tell you, why don't we go to Santa Monica, but this time without the papoose in tow. Yeah, Patti, all she does is curb our operation. Francie... you've always been a part of a foursome. You can't quit now. You'll be fringed, out in the cold. Now, you know you don't want that. Well, it... it's already happened, hasn't it, Patti? I guess I just don't belong anymore. Really! Letting eligible men see you in an outfit like that. Haven't you any pride? Pride? I guess I'll have to look up the definition of the word again. Okay, so the word's around... I'm for the birds. Help! Help! Help! Help! Help! Somebody, help! Help! Help! Help! Help! Somebody, help! This is it. Now, hold on for your life. We're gonna shoot the curl. You feel okay? I... I guess. Hi. Hi. Hey, Mr. Lifeguard Hero, sir! Nice fishing, Moondoggie, but, uh, what is it? Hey, some pull-out, huh? Yeah, wasn't it? Hey, can we do it again? For your information, you almost drowned. Yeah, you better listen to Moondoggie here, miss. See, this beach is for surfers only. It's too dangerous for dames. Dames? Oh, no, I'm no dame. Oh, well, what do you know? It has all the earmarks of a dame. You better get your monocle, Lord Byron. Those are not ears. It's a dame all right, only kind of a pint-sized version. Maybe she had amnesia? If I just took her up to the... Okay, okay, you guys, knock it off. Win a few, lose a few. Be smart, kid. Why don't you go back to your playmates. Oh, but I haven't even thanked you for saving my life... Okay, so now you have. Go on back to Mama... and run, don't walk. Hey, what are you, robbing the cradle, Moondoggie? Hey, she's a trifle young, don't you think? My hero, sir. I'm so glad you saved me! Artificial respiration, please. Guess I'm getting kicked out... Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey... Oh! You gonna be sick? Are you Stinky? Yeah. Gee, if... if I had one of those boards, I could be a surfer too. I could come down here and surf anytime I wanted to, just like the guys. You kidding? You couldn't even lift one. Hey! Okay, okay. All right! There. That's not the only catch. What? They cost about 75 clams apiece. Even an old used one is $25. All I've got left out of my allowance is 4.50. Hey, but my credit's good! What do you think we're running here, a finance company? But I just got to have one of those boards, I've just got to. What's the matter? Won't the little girls play dollies with you anymore? Oh, them, all they care about is... Forget it. Gee, all I wanted to do is surf. That's all. 25 is rock bottom, huh? Yeah, rock bottom. Okay, I'll bring it. Yeah? When? Tomorrow. A manhunt? Uh-huh. Francie? Our little girl? Our teenage daughter, Russ. I don't care what she is, Dorothy, I won't have it. It's a biological fact, Russ. The female matures earlier than the male. A manhunt... Mm-hmm. My daughter's out traipsing around luring... well, who knows what hoodlums. Dorothy, why did she have to go? Oh, I don't think Francie was eager to. Well, in the name of heavens will you tell me what is this, a place that you escape from? Shh! That's a manhunter? Well, who did you expect, Kim Novak? Hi, Mom and Pop. I'm home. I'm going to give that young lady a good talking to. Russ, don't you dare light into that poor child. I'm not going to light into her, I'm only going to give her a talking to. Growing up is a very slow and painful process for a girl. Well... Darling, do you have a headache? Yes, I do. I think it's the glasses. Oh, come here. Lie down. Oh, Russ, can't you see? She went because she had to. A girl needs love. Well, I love her. She's my little girl, my little baby. I'd do anything for her, and... I have it! Pop, can I get you your slippers? How about a pipe? No, no, no, no, no. How would you like to do your old dad a big, big favor, though? Mow the lawn? No, no. You're all off. Sit down. Uh, Dorothy, you remember Jeffrey Matthews? No, I don't, dear. I introduced you to him at the convention. He smokes a pipe. Oh, yes. Yeah, well, his son is out here for the summer. He's a wonderful boy... er, man. He's a college man. A-a-a real serious student and accomplished musician. Daddy... Now, naturally, Jeffrey would like to think that his boy was dating the right kind of girl. Daddy, how could you? Francie! How could you? How could I what? Oh, gosh, Mom, you know how I feel about dates. But I thought you enjoyed yourself. Oh, that hot-wet-hand-set. Oh, it's so icky! I... I mean, breathing down a person's neck. Well, now, take Dizzy Maynard, for instance. Now, there's a perfectly swell guy when he's helping me dissect snails in a biology class. On a date, ugh, he gets all unglued. Well, he probably was nervous. He was only a mess. Oh, Daddy, I mean, I... I don't mean to be edgy or rude to you, but... Oh, gee, I've got a real serious problem. Darling, why didn't you tell us? Oh, what is it, Francie? Money. Money? I've got to raise a mint in a hurry. Well, how much is a mint? Well, including what I have on hand, an extra... 21.50 would do it. 21.50 is too much. Oh, Pop, please. Oh, Pop, it could mean sheer heaven or months and months of stark solitude. Do you know what she's talking about? No, I don't. Well, you see, what I need the money for is... a surfboard. A surfboard? A surfboard? A surfboard! I mean, I'm a perfectly good swimmer, and, gee, I'd be extra-super careful. Oh, please! Now, honest, surfing is out of this world! You just can't imagine the thrill of shooting the curl! Well, it positively surpasses every living emotion I've ever had! You must admit, dear, she does make it sound attractive. Well, I don't mind learning my daughter enjoys the pleasures of an outdoor sport... Oh, but, Daddy, surfing is very outdoorish! Oh, please? But it's too much money. Oh, Daddy, I'd work like a slave for it. Please? The sound you now hear is your little baby girl, the one you'd do anything for. I would do anything for her, but... Russ, it is Francie's birthday next month. Oh, for my birthday! Would that ever be cool! He's going to do it! Oh, he's going to do it! Oh, you doll, you! Oh, Daddy, you've made me so happy! Honest to goodness, Mama, this surfboard is a gilt-edge guarantee for a summer of sheer happiness. Oh, I'm not so sure, darling, that there are such guarantees. Hi! Uh, remember me? My name is Francie. Aw, Kahuna... Hi, Francie. Hi. Don't mind him. He's a quiet one. Oh, it's just what Moondoggie fished out yesterday. I was looking for Stinky. I... I got the money for my board. Gosh, I can hardly wait to try it out. You done much surfing? Uh, no, not too much. Yesterday was my first. Boy, was it ever exciting! It was like nothing I ever felt before! Whoop! We're on an elevator headed for the sky. And then, zoom! Speeding across the ocean, on top of the world! It was the ultimate! The big kick, huh? Sounds like you're a goner, kid. And what a way to go. Coming out, Kahuna? Naw, I got to brew up my morning java first. Oh, let me do it. I'm a wizard in the kitchen, and, well, besides, I have to wait for Stinky, anyway. All right, wizard, the job's yours. Hey, gee, this is neat. Why, somebody could almost live here. Hello, Mary. We do. Flyboy and me. When I get you back to Peru, I'm going to dump you with the rest of your feathered relatives. You're going to Peru? And I mean it. What? You're going to Peru? Yeah, either there or Hawaii. You know, got to follow the sun. You can't mean... I'm a surf bum. You know, ride the waves, eat, sleep, not a care in the world. Here... You hear that? The sea left its whisper in there. That's the secret to the whole thing. Well... well, how do... Excuse me, I... I don't mean to be nosy. Who's nosy? What do you want to know, angel? My life's an open book. Well, it... it may be awfully naive of me, but when do you work? Oh, yeah, well, I tried that once, but there were too many hours and rules and regulations. Nobody ever consulted me about what flight I was in the mood for. You mean, the Air Force? Yeah. When that Korean bit was over, I knew there was one thing I didn't want in life... chains. And the others? They're all bums too? No... No... No, they just like to surf. For them, it's a summer romance. For me, it's a full-time passion. What'll happen to your future? I mean, doesn't everybody have to have a goal or something? Who said? There's your answer, little one. "Who said." The swells are getting pretty big. I'll see you later. Come on. Hi! How's the water? Gee, you look neat. Hello, Francie. How's it going? I say, there's nothing like this in England, you know. There'll always be a Santa Monica. Hey, now. Hey, what's up? How about that tunnel back there. Did you see it, huh? It was a beauty, a great piece of chop. Francie... have you met the whole crew yet? Waikiki. Aloha. You know Stinky, of course... fastest parking attendant West of the Rockies. When he works. Very funny. Yeah, who works when the surf's good. That's Lord Byron. The beard means he digs existentialism. Hot Shot, big fraternity man, and Lover Boy. He'll tell you all about himself. He sure will. Oh, hey, hey, hey! Oh, oh, oh! Watch it! And Moondoggie, your heroic lifesaver. Oh, we're all friends. Please, no tourists, Kahuna. Hey, Francie's no tourist. She's got a real yen to pick up on surfing. That gidget? A gidget. Hey, wait a minute, fellows. Let me in on the gag too, huh? You see, it's arrived at through osmosis. Yeah. Girl and midget... a gidget. All right, let's have a little respect for a cash customer, huh? Cash customer? Cash? You bring the moolah? Money? Pounds? Pounds? Money? Oh, you nice wahine. Money gidget bringer. What a bundle. Ah, beautiful. Yeah, and warm. Crazy, crazy. Hey, fellows, we're eating again. Aren't we? Aren't we, Stinky, eating? Huh? Yeah, I guess. You guess. You sure do. Hey, maybe we could let the Gidget run delivery service from the hot dog stand. Boolee! Boolee. Oh, I'd be glad to! Gee, fellows, this is the way I like it, the way I always like it. How's that, angel? Oh, you know, just kids horsing around, having picnics. Easygoing stuff. None of that technique business for me. I'll be right back. Yeah, get me a hot dog with the works, honey! Hey, get me a taco! I'll have a hamburger with chips. Any kind of taco fine for me. Get me one of each, and get something for yourself... Hey, Kahuna, what are we starting, a baby farm here? Relax, man. It's like this, man... if you're really serious about making it as a full-time surf bum like me... Oh, you know I am. Well, then you got to learn to take what you can get. Here, I found these on the floor. I guess they fell out of your pocket. As long as it was nothing important. Let's not kid, huh? You know it was my allowance check. Okay, so maybe you think I shouldn't have torn it up. Look, kid, you've got no obligations to me. I admit it's been getting a little hungry around here, but you know the code... Live and let live. Well, you know I buy that, Kahuna. It's not that. It's my old man. He started out on a shoestring and worked his way up to be a big wheel. Yeah... I mean, how is a guy to measure up to someone like him? I just got to walk out. Quit. Only, you see, it's got to be a clean break. It just wouldn't smell right if I kept taking handouts. Yeah... Yeah. Hey, chow! Those hogs. Somebody must have taken seconds. Here. Thanks, I'm not hungry. Oh, but you've got to. It's delicious. Come on. Cut it out, will you? I'm no cruddy sponger. Well, I should hope not. Oh, look, I didn't pay for the eats, just for the board, remember? I... I guess Stinky did it. Come on, try it. And anyway, what if I had? Gosh, I owe you my life. Forget it, will you? The way we see it around here, the Kahuna and me, nobody owes anybody anything. Not if they play it smart. Not if they don't let themselves get involved. Why don't you run along home, kid? Boy, are you a grouch. Hey, kid. It's kind of waterlogged. Yeah, but courtesy of the house, we throw in a free lesson. Here. Come on, doll, follow your coach. Hey, this is the ultimate! There you go. There you are, honey. Flat as a pancake, huh? Well, almost, anyway. Well, now, let me see, can I... can I make you a little more comfortable? No, this is fine. Fine? Fine? Oh, all right. Yeah. Let me see, it's very simple. All you do is dig in, push yourself forward... Just keep yourself in the middle of the board. That's it. That's it, keep pushing forward, huh. Hey, come on, you're tickling me. He'll coach her. Just a minute till I hop on here. There we go. Cozy, huh? Do you like it? Yeah, it's all right, but what do I do now? No hurry, just got to get used to the feel. Hey! Huh. It's pretty good for the first time, huh? Now I'll take her in a little deeper. She's in deep enough already. You've had it, coach. Dissolve. We'll, get him. Come on, Gidge. Let's go out and have little fun, huh? Oh, no. Thanks all the same. So who needs it. Come on, Gidget. Oh, brother, that guy's glands must be working overtime. Listen, Gidge, the kind of lessons you'll pick up around here aren't for you. So if you know what's good for you, you'll take your board and run along like a good little girl, huh? Francie! Shut off that infernal racket. Infernal racket... No wonder they call them the Lost Generation. Glad you had such a good time at the beach. Oh, yeah, it was creamy. Tell me about it. I'd like to hear. What are these boys like? Oh gosh, they're all nice boys. You know, the Kahuna, he's promised to coach me. Kahuna, that's a boy's name? Yeah, well, he's an older boy. In Hawaiian, it means, "Big chief". Hmm... and is he the one you like best? Best? Well, yeah, I guess so. I mean, they're all nice guys. Well, that's good. All except one. Mom? Hmm? There's something I have to ask you. Shoot. Well, do you find that there's anything weird about me? Francie... Mom, I mean, gee, I'm serious. Here I am, almost 17, the same age as Nan and the rest of them. Why don't I like dates? Darling, you like boys, don't you? Well, sure. I mean, well, boys are the most fun, but... well... I mean, I just can't stand when they start smooching and pawing and... Well, level with me, Mom, doesn't that kind of stuff make your skin crawl? Well, it would depend on who. Oh, there it is then, it proves it. I am different. Oh, sweetheart, please believe me, the only difference between you and your friends is you're not a... a manhunter. You're too genuine to pretend anything you don't feel yet. Yet? Someday, darling, you will. It'll all be different then because you'll feel something magic, like little bells ringing in your heart. Oh, gee, you make it sound real nice, but are you sure that's gonna happen to me? I'm positive. Huh. Well, that's a relief. You know, I almost saw myself pickled in a jar at Harvard. Oh, well, stop worrying. Yeah, but when, and I mean, how am I going to know what... what boy, or... When it's the real thing, you'll know it, as surely as if you'd been hit on the head with a sledgehammer. Good night, dear. Good night. Thank you. It probably won't happen to me before I'm middle-aged. Oh, no. Back again? Any objections? You want me to reel off the whole list? Go ahead. Then I might start. Better step on it, Moondoggie, before it bites you. Relax. I invited the Gidge to stay. We can use a mascot around here. Oh, well, in that case, fellows, maybe we ought to initiate her. Go ahead, initiate me. Whoa, she's asking for it. Hey, fellows! Let go! Hey! Hey! Go on down and cut some kelp. Hey, you still want to be a member? Sure! Sure... Okay. Keep cutting. G-gee, fellows, this is g-great fun. I'm glad you like it. What happened? You got tangled in some kelp. Now, take it easy, you hear. You're still on the blue side. Hey, I... I made it, didn't I? I'm a real member now, huh? You crazy tomboy. Yeah, I guess you're a member now. Oh... Are you okay? Sure. I never felt better in my life. If... If I had to, I'd... I'd do it all over again. Yeah, I bet you would. It very well may be She's just a baby Speaking romantically If that's your bad feature I'll be the teacher That's the way it's gonna be Gidget is the one for me... Hey, you know... I kind of like being called that now. What's that, Gidget? Although she's just small fry Just about so-high Gidget is the one for me A regular tomboy But dressed for a prom Boy, how cute Can one girl be? Although she's not king size Her finger is ring size Gidget is the one for me If she says she loves you You can bet your boots She loves you If she says she hates you That can also mean She loves you It very well may be She's just a baby Speaking romantically If that's a bad feature I'll be the teacher That's the way it's gonna be Gidget is the one for me Hey, you don't look very good. I'd better see if I can get one of the guys to drive you home. Moondoggie? G-gee, I don't want to be a drag to you, but I was thinking... maybe you could take me home? Well, uh, I'm... Hi... How's our mascot? Oh, she'll live. What time is it, Kahuna? A little after 5:00. After 5:00? Oh, brother, I got to go. I'll see you later. What jet-propelled him all of a sudden? Oh, you know men. After sunset, they get a little restless. Rumor has it Moondoggie's got a big date tonight. Oh... Hey, don't tell me that Gidget's jealous. Who, me? I never heard anything so ridiculous... Oh, just a passing impression. Oh. Oh... Hey, baby, you really are sick. No, I just feel like I've been hit on the back of the head with a sledgehammer. Moondoggie... Moondoggie... There, there, dear. It's just the fever. Doctor said it was too much sun and water. Just a touch of tonsillitis, but you'll be all right. No, Mommy, no, it... it's something else. Darling, what is it? You kept saying Moondoggie. Well, that's it. He's the one. Oh, Mom. It's all true, just like you said about... about a person knowing when it happens. Mom, but what does a person do about it? Do? Darling, according to Dr. West, you won't be doing anything away from this room for at least a couple of weeks. Oh, a couple of weeks. Besides, one of the advantages of being a young lady is is it's not up to you. It's up to the young man. There, now, try and get some sleep, huh? Don't worry. Yeah, but what if the young man doesn't know you're alive? The young lady be darned. I've got to figure out a plan of attack. I mean, it's... it's perfectly obvious that you get a man through his own interests. Put one foot a few inches ahead of the other, near the center of the board. Yeah? Stop forward or back to meet the changing pitch of the wave. Oh, boy, when I think of all the hours I spent cramming on math and biology... No, I'm to blame. That time I congratulated you for getting straight A's? What a friend. You know, I... I should've belted you one, right then. No, no, no, it's my fault. I should have worked at being an "A" student in both, but don't worry, I've never flunked out on a subject yet, and by the time I shake this crummy tonsillitis, I'm going to be the best female surfer in California! Oh! What's happening? She just got thrown under by a 30-foot wave! Hi. Hi. Not bad for a beginner. Were you really sick, or did you go hire yourself a coach somewhere? No, not a coach, just some books. Some books? Oh, I boned up on a few basic principles... You can learn anything from books, you know. Now make a wish and blow. A wish, uh... Okay... Oh, I did it! Oh, golly, it's beautiful. Uh, where's... where's all your friends from the beach, and... and where's B.L.? Oh, well, B.L. would've broken her date, and, well, as for the crew... I... I guess I'll get them here sometime. I mean, you know what Saturday night means to most fellows. Well, uh... I know what it means in the Lawrence house. Duet time, eh, Francie-girl? Moondoggie! Hey, wait... Put her down, boys. Set her right down. Crowned! Hey! Hip, hip, hooray! Hip, hip, hooray! My turn. That's great! Whoo-hoo! Oh, Moondoggie! Hey, Joanne! This is the kid I was telling you about. She's only been surfing a little over a month. Really? It must be wonderful, if you like that sort of thing. Of course, Moondoggie can tell you I'm not the outdoor type. Then you better get out of the sun before you melt. Oh, ho, ho. Yeah, that's right. Come on. See you at the luau, huh? What luau? Oh, no. You aren't gonna scare our Gidget there. Uh-uh. Honest, fellows, I'd love a luau. When is it? Not for a couple of weeks. But don't give it another thought, baby. But why? Because it's not a coming-out party. And it's not a weenie-roast. As a matter of fact, honey, this luau is not a luau... It's an orgy. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Ha, ha. Will you fellows stop treating me like an infant? Oh... Forget it. You're not the type. So long, Gidge. One, two, one, two, one, two, one, two, one, two, one, two, one, two, one, two, one, two, one, two, one, two... Oh, I'm exhausted. Oh, come on. Don't give up so easily. What's the use? Well, let's see how much progress we've made. Oh, it'll take forever to add even an inch, and the luau's only 10 days away. If I want to be the type of girl to get invited, I have to think of something faster. Francie, I've told you, there's only one way. Oh, I just couldn't. I mean, I'd feel like a man with a toupee. Oh, no. Gee, all my life, I've found the answer to all my problems in these books, but who wants to solve their love life with poison or a dagger? Gee, if I could only make Moondoggie jealous. Jealous of who? Whom. Well, gee, not any of the high school creeps I know. Man, would I give a tidy sum to be... I've got it! How to get to the luau and make him jealous! 20 bucks? Just to take you to a luau? No, I told you, not just to take me. You've got pretend like you're real gone over me. You know, give me the mad rush. Hey, who is this guy you're out to turn green? Oh... no. Well, I don't know. It just sounds like easy money, but... I kind of had some plans of my own at that luau. Just till midnight. Well... Just till midnight, huh? Okay, it's a deal. Oh, great. But picking you up first, that's extra for gas. Oh, that's the last of my allowance again. Hey, couldn't we compromise, you know, meet somewhere? Well, you know the espresso cafe on Wilshire, Portofino? Uh-huh. Yeah, there. A week from Saturday night. Yeah, but you got to square it with the Kahuna first. Oh, don't worry, I will. Kahuna, I want to come to that luau. Baby-doll, what is it with you? Don't you ever give up? Well, not when I want something. Well, it's like anything, you want it bad enough, you work for it, and right now what I want more than anything else in the whole wide world is to go to that luau! Well, Kahuna, you know yourself, it's the bang-up finish to the whole summer! Why, it's like graduation day. I mean, it's the ultimate! Oh, Gidget, Gidget, Gidget... Besides, what's it to the great Kahuna whether I'm the type or not. You said it yourself, the code is, "Live and let live." Oh, it's no skin off my nose what you do, but the rest of the crew might not like it. Oh, Kahuna, they won't care, not if you say it's all right, and besides, I've already got an escort, and... oh, I'll bring piles of food... piles and piles of food. We've got more stuff in our freezer that's practically forgotten, and... and if you ever tasted my mom's cheesecake... All right. A man's got to look after his own stomach. You got any steaks in that freezer? I'll do my best. Gee, Kahuna, I can't thank you enough. You just don't know what it means to me to... Gee, I'm sorry, Kahuna. I know Flyboy was all you had. Kahuna... please don't feel too bad. What? The bird? Hell, when I get down to Peru, I'll get me a bird that treats me with a little respect. Respect. That... That's terribly important to you, isn't it? What? I mean, all the fellows around here respect you. Well, because, you... you're a person who knows what he wants to do and goes ahead and does it. You're so self-sufficient. You don't need anybody. Well, n-now, take me. I... I couldn't live that way because, well, gee, I'd get too lonely. Of course, if I were to lose my only family, or... or at the end of every summer, just when I'd get settled, I had to move on and leave all my new friends... Gosh, if I had a whole lifetime of that, and well, I'd about die. Oh, but of course, you're different. Yeah. Oh, you are. I mean, you'd have to be to be able to turn your back on the way everybody else lives. Well, I mean, everybody in life is... is working for some sort of a goal, or... well, I mean, I mean, you don't have a goal or... Oh, Kahuna, I'm sorry. What's there to be sorry about? I told you myself, I'm a surf bum. There's nothing to be sorry about. No, of course not. Kahuna? Kahuna... could I ask you just one crazy question? Yeah. I mean, I understand how you said in the war you got sick of all the rules and regulations, and, well, about this dream you had that when you got loose there'd be no more chains, nothing but a free life. Is that right? That's right. That's what you said then? That's right. That's what the man said, he... Only what if you could go back to that time in your life, if... if something happened, and you could choose all over again? If I could what? If you could choose all over again. Well, I said it was a crazy question. Cheer up, angel. Don't you know that frowning is bad for the face, beautiful? Besides, you're going to the luau. Oh, yeah, the luau. Gee, Kahuna, thanks. Thanks a lot. Thanks loads. Hey, man. Oh, boy, can't you just feel it in the air? Feel what? The end of summer. Gee, with the guys off signing up for fall semester, the beach is half deserted already. Oh, I tell you, I can hardly wait till we hop that freighter. How soon... Hey, what's the matter? Who said anything was the matter? Well, not me. No, sir. It's just like I wrote my old man, I'm not going back to school. Right now is the whole turning point of my life. Here, you want to read it? Well, why should you. It's my problem. That's right. It's your problem. Look, it's okay. I... I got it handled. You don't need to worry. Look, all I'm thinking about is getting on our way to places we'll see. Yeah. Yeah, the Island of Kauai... see the very place where the natives presented this to the great Kahuna. Presented it? I bought it in Acapulco for 20 cruddy pesos. You better start learning, Moondoggie, there's a price tag on everything. Well, so what. You bought it. Look, I can take a gag. You weren't worried? I mean, you don't have to worry anything's gonna change my mind about going now. I'm going, all right. Yes, sir, I'm going. Boy, will my father be surprised to see he's not the only one. The only what? Oh, I told you, a wheel. Now, wait till he finds out about me... carving out a life for myself, moving around this whole cockeyed hemisphere with guys around me treating me like a king, like you, Kahuna. Yeah. Boy, there's a funny bit. You know, about the only thing my father's afraid of is water. Hey, where are you going? Tell Waikiki I borrowed his car to go into town. What's she doing upstairs? I don't know, dear. Francie! Francie, Saturday night, concert time! What's all this? Francie, you didn't tell us. Tonight must be special. Well, uh, so long, Fran. I'll see you later. So long, B.L., and thanks for everything. Well, I... I guess I should have told you, but I can't make it tonight. You see, the fellows down at the beach are giving a big... a big party. Isn't that wonderful, Russell? Well... Well, what time is the lucky young man going to pick up his glamorous date? Oh, uh, I'm not being picked up. You see, he's meeting me somewhere. Hold it. Daddy, I'm really very late. Obviously, there's some mistake. A gentleman, Francie, always picks up the young lady... Well, this gentleman is different. Well, let him get undifferent fast. Either you call him up and tell him to come here and pick you up, or forget about the whole thing. Forget it? Yes, forget it. Mother, are you going to let Daddy stand there and ruin the whole thing? Francie, a boy only thinks more of you if you... I worked like a dog to get even invited to this brawl! Am I to understand that a daughter of mine would even think of going to a place that she was unwelcome? Go ahead! Go ahead and say all the horrible things you like, but I'm not changing my mind! Oh, Francie, your father just loves you too much to let anyone treat you shabbily. Baby... the last thing in the world I want to do is make my little girl unhappy. Yes. There... You look prettier without tears. Oh, Pop, Mama, I'm sorry. I don't mean to yell, or... or be fresh, or... All right... It's all over now. After all, all I ask is to make sure that the boys my little girl goes out with are worthy of her. Take a boy like Jeffrey Matthews' son... Oh, I am not interested in Jeffrey Matthews' son or his nephew or his dog! Francie! I just want to go, and I'm going! In the name of heavens, what is this? Well, if you must know, it's a bribe. That's how anxious all the fellows are to take out your darling daughter. Dorothy... Dorothy. Francie, really. Oh, that's only the half of it. To get this date tonight, I had to fork over cold cash. What kind of insanity has taken hold of this family? Cold cash, legs of lamb. Do you think this is what the young man of today wants? You're so right. The man I'm after sure does want something else, and I'll see he gets it! Dorothy, I tell you, unless you take that daughter of yours in hand, I'm going to... Russ, she's driving away! She's what? Ooh, ooh! She can't. She can't. I won't let her. I'm going lock her in her room. Hey, Gidge... Gee, you look dressed to kill. Thanks. Who are you out to slaughter? Huh? I said, you look like you're out to hook some guy. Oh, no, I'm just waiting for my date. Okay if I wait with you? Suit yourself. Where's Joanne? I had to stand her up tonight. I'm working. You're not coming to the luau? Oh, sure, I'll be there. That's where my job takes me. You guessed it. Old Hot Shot got tied up till midnight, so I've taken over the... assignment. You have? Oh... Oh, but... but you can't. Why? Why? Well, for crying out... Do you know who that stoop Hot Shot had lined up for the job? Lover Boy! A lady wrestler wouldn't be safe with that octopus, let alone a babe in arms like you. Oh, well, thank you very much, but I can take care of myself. Besides, what's it to you? To me? Nothing. Why should it be? Just a good paying job, and besides, with the plans I've got lined up... I could use some easy cash. I see. Relax. Listen, I can play Romeo as well as Hot Shot any time. You trust old Moondoggie, baby. I'll fake it fine. But, I... Look, it's okay. Hot Shot briefed me on the setup. You want to get a certain guy jealous, right? You don't have to tell me who it is till after we get there. Come on. Got a cute little girl And I call her Cinderella I'm so in love with her I'm the lucky guy That she calls her fellow And she always will I'm sure We can dance all night At the record-hop Dance all night Up to 12:00 We can spend the night Jumping But my head would be A-thumping If I didn't get her home On time I'd lose my love sublime And maybe this head of mine I'm her own Prince Charming And her beauty's so alarming When I pick her up at 8 Cinderella's so fine And she's always mine For a regular weekend date She's real clean When she climbs aboard Her royal coach My hopped-up Ford Then away we fly Cinderella and I To our favorite Drive-in show And at 12:00 It's home we go But we drive home very slow Listening to the radio In the book it says That the clock struck 12:00 And the magic of her beauty Was gone Well, the girls compare But it stops right there 'Cause my Cinderella's magic Goes on I may have to lose her At 12:00 But my Cinderella's beauty Won't ever stop If you want to see She's the one with me She's the one That makes my life complete She's pretty and soft And sweet How can anyone be so neat? Mm-hmm, mm, mm, mm... It looks like every surfer from here to San Onofre turned up. Hundred to one, they never set foot in the ocean. Hey, Gidget, where's that steak? Oh, that's all right, honey. Go have a ball. All right, do you want to spill it now? Who's the poor innocent joker you're out to hook? Do you have ask? Well, let's say I can make a guess, but anyway, I've got a part to play, haven't I? Well, boy, I just hope you're a better actor than student of human nature. What? Practically any fool could have seen, the whole summer long, the one I'm gone on. Kahuna, of course. Kahuna? Well, who else? Why, you must be kidding. He's twice your age. Oh, I know, Oedipus and all that. It's called a father complex. Only, the way I feel about Kahuna... well, it's just not daughterly. You sure could've fooled me. Nobody can help you make him jealous. Take it from me. I know the Kahuna. Look, you weren't hired for advice. Now, do you want the job, or do I have to find someone else? What'll the boss lady have first? Well, I-I-I guess we could begin by holding hands. All right, what next? Well, all we need to do for a while, till Kahuna takes notice, is pretend like we're mad for each other. On the surface only, of course. Oh, yeah, on the surface only, of course. The Gidget stuck on the great Kahuna... Well, I'm no different from any of them... except for one thing. Understatement of the year. Look, when I make up my mind to get something, I get it. I mean it. I'd do anything to get Kahuna. Now, Gidge, you listen to me. I mean, as... as a friend, I've got to straighten you out. Kahuna's okay, I suppose, but for a kid like you... Yes? Well, uh, don't you find the Kahuna on the lazy side? Love makes room for faults. Anyway, I have hopes for the Kahuna. He could make something of his life. Oh, boy, now, that is hilarious. And what makes you such an authority on Kahuna? Because he and I are two of a kind. Aw, Gidge... Look, what I said, it's... it's nothing personal. I mean, a girl like you... you're a real responsibility. You take a guy who believes in no strings attached, a guy like me, even... I mean, if I... if I were ever to, uh, to let myself go... Yes? Well, say, for example, right now, right this minute... I mean, if this... if this weren't just a job for pay... Um, could you put them back? I mean, only because I think Kahuna's looking, and we could make it look real, couldn't we? Sure. Is he looking now? Mm, I'm sure of it. There's no such thing As the next best thing to love No substitute Or facsimile thereof Just try and do without it Go see how far you get Why don't we face it? What can replace it? Nothing They've thought of yet There's no such thing With the very same appeal And nothing like When you fall in love for real Whether it be the real thing This much I'm certain of There's no such thing As the next best thing to love There's no such thing as The next best thing to love No substitute Or facsimile thereof How can we disregard it? How can we not take heed? Just like the inner Craves for the dinner Love is a human need There's no such thing As the next best thing to love Necessity gave A cold, cold hand a glove Likewise someone to cling to When there's a moon above There's no such thing as The next best thing to love Oi! Hey, hey! Hey, Moondoggie, baby. Break it up. Come on, it's five after 12:00. You're off duty. Uh, I hope Moondoggie here gave you your money's worth. Oh, don't worry, he... he gave a great performance. Hey, hey, hey. What is it, little one? What, did you... did you lose Moondoggie? Yeah, I lost him, all right. It's about the best thing that ever happened to me. Oh... Oh, well, I think I'll cut out too. Uh, will you give me a lift? Sure. Where to? A friend of mine, uh, has a shack down the beach. I figured I wouldn't get any sleep here tonight, so I borrowed it. You sure you want to leave so soon? Yeah, I'm sure. I'll wait for you in the car. Hey, Gidge, listen, Gidge, about that money... Forget it. Wait a minute! I'm sorry, but the Kahuna's waiting. We just happen to be on our way to a certain beach shack. Beach shack? Who else is going? Just Kahuna and me. Don't underestimate your performance back there, Barrymore. It sold the Kahuna 100 percent, and you earned every penny of it. Listen, maybe the Kahuna's gone off his rocker, but you, on one of his little private parties? Gidge, you don't know what you're getting into. Well, a girl has to get started sometime, and the Kahuna has always been a great coach. You've been awful quiet, angel. What is it? Moondoggie? Moondoggie? Oh... No, I've forgotten all about him. Okay. Good night, angel. Uh, I suppose, uh, well, you and he talk a lot about your dates and things, huh? Yeah, we're pretty close. Why? Anything I can do? Is there! Oh, well, no, not about Moondoggie. I... I mean, golly, who cares about him, but... Well, look, I was wondering... Well, would it be all right if I came inside for a while? Oh, well, uh, it's a little late, and I had planned on getting to bed pretty soon. Um, all right, angel. If it's that important, come on. Gee... I guess you could call this ones of the major steps in my life. Make yourself at home, Gidge. I'll, um... see if I can scare up some coffee or something. Look. Come on. Oh, young man, could you help us? We're looking for our daughter, Francie Lawrence. Francie... No, I'm sorry... I believe the boys call her Gidget. Oh, Gidge, yeah. Do you know where she is? I don't know. But Moondoggie helped himself to my car to follow her. Follow her where? Well, he said she went with Kahuna to Joe's place. Joe's place? What is that, a restaurant? Could you tell us how to get there? I don't know where it is, but it's no restaurant. It's just some beach shack. Beach shack! Gee, this is a real den of iniquity, isn't it? Yeah... You sure you wouldn't rather have coffee? Well, how about it? How about what? How about one of your little private parties? How about one of my little... private parties? Are you, um... are you sure that's want you want? Well, well, uh, I mean... well, sure. That's what I came here for. In that case, we need the right atmosphere, hmm? Nice, huh? Nice. Ah, the language of love. Oh, um... maybe you'd like to... slip into something more comfortable, hmm? Oh, well... Well, no, I don't think so, no. I've got just the thing. You'd be surprised what the past, uh, tenants have left here. Yeah, there we are. Just right. We'll keep it right there... for whenever you want it. Outside, the ocean. Inside, you and me, and nothing else matters, hmm? Who was it that said, "Suspended in time and space," "your lips on mine, the soft contours of... " I don't know. I did. I just made it up. You inspire me. Oh? Hey... Hey, you... really are sweet. Oh, no, I'm just... just a little... Soft... and sweet... and lovely, and cute... What is it? It's time for you to go home, that's what it is... before I forget it's just a game. All right, now, get out. Come on, beat it. Oh, it's Moondoggie! I could just die. I suppose you'll tell him how you dusted me off. Oh, that'll slay him. It'll really slay him. The two of you can fall down laughing. Come on, open up! Come on, I know she's in there! Come on, open up! Hey, look, pal, I'm a little busy in here. Get lost, huh. Not a chance. This is something I would've never pegged you for. Bringing a broad to a place like this, that's one thing, but the Gidget... What's wrong with the Gidge? Personally, I find her delightful company, and... a very good sport. Hey, you had enough? I'll tell you what I've had enough of... That's the place. Right over there. Right down there. All right, lady, stand back. We'll take care of it. I told Walter the minute we saw that girl go in... trouble. I got an eye for things like this. I can spot trouble through a crack in the blind, and when that other one went banging on the door, I told Walter, "Call the police." No, just a friendly little tousle, officer. There won't be any more trouble. I can promise you that. All right, Matthews, we'll hold you to it. Thank you. All right, where's the Gidget? She's not here. You may as well know, she's scarcely the charmer I made her out to be. I guess you heard her squawking for help, huh? Why you... The party's over, now blow. I'll blow when I'm ready. Get ready. Underneath it all, I always did think you were a little bit of a square. Yeah, well, listen, if cutting corners like you... Bury it. Either a man's got a talent for a certain way of life, or he hasn't. You never really did belong. You just lost a customer. Ohh! Oh, gee, thanks for stopping. You see, I got a flat. Isn't it kind of late for you, young lady? May I see your driver's license please? Oh, my purse... well, you see I left home in such a hurry that... Uh-huh. Where have you been? Oh, just on the road at a friend's house, down the highway. Oh? Well, honest. I mean, I don't remember the exact address, but I can prove it. It was the little white house with a long boardwalk. Can't you get on the radio and notify the prowl cars to be on the lookout for my daughter? You have radios in the cars, don't you? Yes, sir. Sir, if you just calm down a little, we might be able to help you. I'm sorry, sergeant. What's the girl's name? Frances. She's about this tall, blond, and she was wearing a little... Orange dress with some white strings on the front? Francie! Oh, Mama... Where have you been? We found her on the road. She's obviously been to the shack where they'd been drinking beer, had a fistfight... Oh, no! If you ever dare to go out again without... I'm afraid the place you daughter was, it looked like a real brawl. Just a tip, sir. Kids need some supervision, a little parental interest... Thank you. Thank you, officer. I assure you, nothing like this will ever happen again. Frances Lawrence, now, listen to me. If I have to lock you in your room, you will never again go near those beach hoodlums. Don't worry. I never again want to lay eyes on them again. Francie! Hey, Francie, come here! Listen, girl, and please don't get sore because it's been so long, because everything's fixed now. And we've made some real conquests down at State beach. Yes, and there's this one extra guy who says he even prefers tomboys. I'm sorry, girls, but I guess I'm just not interested... and even if I was, last night, my dad was on a real rampage, and he says he's running my social life from here on in. Thanks anyway. Oh, poor Francie. I don't know how she's going to face going back to senior year. With nothing to show for the whole summer! Hurry up, Francie, you'll be late. Darling, what is it? Aw, Mom, the other girls, they don't seem to have any trouble, but me, I'm hopeless. I can tell you right now, I'll probably die an old maid and never have made the step. The step? Aw, Mom, I could perish, I could perish with shame. Last night, after all those hours of concentrated effort, I come home as pure as the driven snow. Darling... you're right. A girl does have to become a woman, but you've got it a little mixed up, Francie. Come here. Grandma's old sampler, remember? Read it. "To be a real woman is to bring out the best in a man." Sweet, but tell it to the boys today. Oh, anyway, it's too late. I just don't care anymore. Oh, Francie! Francie, girl! You have a visitor. Jeffrey Matthews is here! Oh, Mom, do I have to go? Oh, darling, your father's so anxious for you to find new interests, so why don't you go, hmm? Come on. I'll be down in a minute. I know that you and Francie will have a lot in common. She's an accomplished musician. She plays the... Francie, this is Jeffrey Matthews. My daughter, Francie. Uh, Francie... this is Jeffrey. My daughter, Francie, Jeffrey. Hello. How do you do? Uh, sit down, Jeffrey. Francie, won't you... sit down? Well, the weather certainly has been... Oh, this is my wife, Mrs. Lawrence. This is Jeffrey's son, Jeff. Hello, Jeff. Mrs. Lawrence. Won't you sit down, dear? I fixed some iced coffee for you, if you'd like. Uh, Mother, I feel a headache coming on. I think I'll go and lie down. Say, I've uh... my friend let me have his convertible tonight, and... Well, you know what they say about fresh air for a headache. Good idea. I've got the top down and everything. Uh, may, I, uh, call you Francie? Why not... Jeffrey? Go right ahead. Darling, try to be gracious. Bye-bye. Bye. Bye. Have a good time. Wow. Now, look, what kind of a gag is this? Wasn't last night enough? Do you have to come back for more laughs? Hey, look, this wasn't my idea. I came as a favor to my dad. How was I to guess some drip cello student would turn out to be you? Thanks. Hey, wait a minute, wait a minute. Now, figure it this way... it's better than trying to keep up a farce in front of your parents. Anyway, right now, there's one thing I've got to do, and you're coming with me. Come on, get in. What's the idea? Just want to take a last look, is all. Gidge... There's nothing more to say. I'm only here to be gracious. Kahuna, what are you doing? Closing up shop. You know, call of the sea, follow the sun, and all of that jazz. But last night, you never mentioned it. You didn't even say goodbye or... Well, isn't it usual for friends to... He wouldn't dig the word. What's with you two? What's happened? Nothing, except the guy he pictured to be above the whole crowd, he now figures for the gutter. Kahuna, listen... Get off my back, will you? Look, last night, I guess we both said a lot of things we didn't mean. - Who didn't mean them? - Jeff... Like I said, either a guy's got a talent for a certain way of life, or he hasn't. He's taken a job. All that bilge about the free soul, it's fake. It doesn't mean anything if a guy doesn't really mean it. It's a fake and a phony if it's not what you really want... and you don't. But you do. That's right, I do. You don't need anybody. Not a soul. No, just a free life, no chains. Not a one, not a one and a... Okay... so you know. I can't kid anybody. You start a guy like me thinking, it's fatal. So long, Gidget. And you... Just remember, she might be pint-sized, but she's quite a woman. Hey... What did he, uh... what did he mean, "Quite a woman"? Oh, it's just something between the two of us... and my mom and my grandmother. Gee, I... I never figured he'd change. Well, he's not the only one who's changed. I wired my dad this morning, and... and I'm headed back home for college tomorrow, and, uh... Well, I just hope we could part friends. After all, we did have a lot of laughs this summer. Yeah, I guess we did. Hey, what is this? I've never had any trouble talking with girls before in my life, but with you, it's different. Look, you're the one that's been telling me all about this, uh... crazy feeling one person can get about another person. Yes? Oh, what's the use. Moondoggie... Forget it. Moondoggie... Come on, Francie, I'll take you home. Oh, brother, the bigger the are, the dopier they come. Oh, gee, would, uh... would you, uh, sort of wear this till I come back? Oh, boy, would I! Oh, just wait... wait till the girls get a load of this. Honest to goodness, it's the absolute ultimate! |
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