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Greetings (1968)
'In South Vietnam,
'communist groups from the North have made their deepest penetration 'into territory of the South so far in the war. 'The enemy used tanks in an ambush today 'against some 200 American Air Cavalrymen 'touching off a four-hour battle near Khe Sanh. 'And this late dispatch from the US command in Vietnam: 'allied troops have killed 243 more Vietcong 'in the vicinity of Saigon, in a battle that is still raging. 'President Johnson told a pro-administration 'labor convention in the nation's capital today, 'that this country will stand firm in Vietnam, 'and at the same time continue to build better conditions in America. 'It sort of took a fellow back to the days of Harry Truman, 'to hear his audience cheer him on with shouts of, "Give 'em hell!" 'as the President defended his record.' 'Now, the America that we are building 'would be a threatened nation 'if we let freedom and liberty die in Vietnam. 'We will do what must be done, 'and we'll do it both at home 'and we'll do it wherever our brave men are called upon to stand.' 'This is the America that we have faith in. 'This is a nation that is building. 'This is a wonderful country that's growing. 'And I hope that you men 'are determined to help us meet these problems. 'I hope you men are determined to see us help get justice, 'not just for ourselves, 'but for all the people of this nation 'and for all the people of the world. 'And I sometimes wonder why we Americans enjoy 'punishing ourselves so much, 'with our own criticism. 'This is a pretty good land. 'I'm not saying you never had it so good. 'But that is a fact, isn't it?' Greetings, greetings, greetings Would you like to go away? Greetings, greetings, greetings Come and see me, don't delay Spend a day or two with Uncle Sam Greetings, greetings, greetings I'm coming to make a small request Greetings, greetings, greetings You'll soon find I know what's best So be my guest, but you do what I say Would you like to go back to bed? Forget about all the things that you've seen and you've read Greetings, greetings, greetings Would you like to go away? Greetings, greetings, greetings Come and see me, don't delay Spend a day or two with Uncle... Spend a day or two with Uncle... Spend a day or two with Uncle Sam... Which one of you niggers is man enough just to take me on? - What happened to your face? - Don't touch it. Oh, gee, what happened? I got stomped by some spades at 125th Street. - Why? - What are you fighting spades for? I'm trying to get out of my pre-induction physical. - So I tried to get my leg busted. - You picked a fight with 'em? - Yeah. - Oh, man! Well, I've got to get out of it somehow. Well, listen, be cool. I can get you out of it. We'll do the same thing for you that I did when I went down there a week ago. Be cool, it's very easy. Er... take your jacket off. Yeah. - Those pants are OK, don't you think? - Oh, yeah, they're good. Tuck your shirt in. All the way around. - All the way. - Yeah. - Get it in there. - Now, pull your pants up. - Pull them way up. - High. No, man. Oh, my penis, man! That's it. Get the belt. - Get it like this. - This is killing me, man! Now let it hang like that. - Got to get the flap down. - That's too blatant. - That's good. - Yeah, that's good. Right, now you need some black lace bikini panties. - Or silk. - Bikini panties, right. That'll be good. When you take pants off, this is really important. Fags, you see, are really Fags are really blatant. I ain't no fag, man! No, you don't understand, we're making you a fag for the induction. - Oh. It's like 'silk-pantsing'? - Right. It sounded pretty strange for a second. You want people to focus in on the crucial area. To scope in on that zone down there. - Take some Kleenex or a pair of socks. - Oh, yeah. Take a pair of socks and just stuff them in the silk panties. Just, er... Just so it bulges. And then what you need is a kind of a fishnet shirt. Oh, yeah, big fishnet, yeah. And then you need like a scarf. Kind of a big, flowing, silk scarf. If you're gonna wear those net shirts, you'll have to shave your chest. You have to shave under your arms. - Your whole body. - Better use Nair. So with the hand on the hip and the wrist, just flop the wrist, just walk right up to the Sergeant, get as close as you can, and seduce him with your eyeballs and say, "Hi!" - Do that. - Hey, fellas, get a load of this. Yeah. And when he talks to the fellas, you turn around and look at the fellas too, see? And give 'em a little sort of wink, a little... Like that, right? Yeah, you got that? And then he'll ask you He'll ask what your name is. - What's your name? - Paul Gerald Shaw. Gerald... I got it! When he asks him his name... This is what you say. What's your name, son? Paul Gerald Shaw. The fellas call me Jerry, but you can call me Geranium. Hey, did you hear that, fellas? What kind of a name is that? What kind of a name is that, son! Oh, my friends think I smell like a flower. Yeah, just like that. And then he'll ask you where you live. Ask me where I live. This is very important. - Alright, where do you live, son? - Oh, I live... around. See, because you've gotta make him believe that you want to live around with him. You want to live around with Sarge. That's really crucial. Then, yeah, he'll turn around to the fellas again, when you say that. Hey, do you hear that, fellas? And then, every time he turns around to the fellas, you turn around them and give them sort of a little... sexy crinkle with the nose and say, "Hi, fellas." - Yeah, do that. Can you do that? - I can do all that. When I get to the end can I say something like... - "Shall I take my clothes off now?" - That's terrific! That's fantastic! - That's beautiful! Really great! - It ain't gonna work. - What do you mean? - It's ridiculous! It ain't gonna work! - Why not? - Because I can't act like a fag! And if they believe me, they'll stick me in the frontlines with the rest of the fags! - What? - Yeah, man! - They don't draft fags. - Wait, wait. I got an idea. I've gotta go down next week. I've got an idea, something that I'm gonna do. - Hey, Lloyd, you be the psychiatrist. - Sure, man. Come in. Reporting as ordered, sir. - Come on, tell me to sit down. - Sit down, son. Thank you, sir. Now watch this... - Request permission to speak, sir. - Go right ahead, son. Well, sir, I don't know why I'm in here, sir. The Sergeant out there, a very nice fella, told me to come in and see you. And there is no reason why I don't want to join the army. I happen to have been doing some work on the outside in a secret organization of which I cannot divulge at the moment, and that's why I haven't joined sooner, sir. - It's just routine procedures. - Oh, routine, of course, sir. But we have the same screening process in our organization, sir. You gotta get that in. Very important. Now, watch. This is very important. Sir, that's no way to run an army out there, you've got niggers, you've got spics, you've got Jews, sir. Everyone knows about the Jews. You're not Jewish, are you, sir? Hey, Paul! You try it, go ahead! Now look straight ahead, you know, real military. - Sir, request permission to speak, sir. - That's it, that's it. Go right ahead, son. I'm not exactly sure why they sent me in here, sir. Cos I'm ready to be a fine soldier, sir, ready to kill me a bunch of commies! Got any personal problems you wanna talk about, son? No, sir, I ain't got no problems at all, sir! - That's it. - He's loud. Now he's gonna ask you what you do, like where you work and stuff like that. - Ask me where I work. - Where do you work now, son? Well, sir, I work at a bookstore and this enables me, sir, to look at all the people, make sure they read right books, and I always try and suggest books like "The F.B.I. Story", sir. But I only do this in the day to earn my meager earnings, to butter my bread and butter. But at night, my true vocation comes out. Now, here you go... You've heard of the New York bowling league, sir? The New York...? You bowl a lot? No, no, no. The New York bowling league, sir? - I'm afraid I don't understand, son. - So now you look around the room. - It's a secret organization, sir. - What do they do? I don't understand at all, son. Well, sir, since it's secret, you probably don't know much about it at all. - The C.R.P.U., sir. - What's the C.R.P.U., son? That's the Civilian Reserve for the Protection of the Union, sir. What does the Civilian Reserve for the Protection of the Union do? We preserve the Union! We're setting up Communication and Weapon Centers all over the country. For the growing menace. Everyday there's more commie bastards and niggers and... ...dirty, undernourished people. Hell, man, that's too real! Like the Chinese restaurants, sir? That's just a plot, sir. You go in there and spend $5 and eat for an hour and a half, and a half hour later you're starving to death. That's a Chinese Communist plot to starve the United States. So I'm going to request that you don't put me in the front lines because as we know there are a lot of Mexican Americans, a lot of niggers, a lot of homosexuals, a lot of undesirable elements, all of the undesirable elements of this country are there. So I request that you put me in the middle, sir, so that when I am shooting at the enemy, I will sort of, accidentally, let my rifle veer a little to the left and pick off a few of those cancerous elements, and then a little to the right to pick off a few more. You see what I mean? You see, hey! And then you say... I just wanna say that if one tenth of the 500,000 men in Vietnam do what I'm gonna do, we could wipe out this yellow peril within a matter of months, sir. You must remember, sir, a few chinks a day keep the Chinese away! That's great. Hey, man... No, man! Look. You're putting him to sleep. Listen, we kept him awake for two days, we gotta keep him going. Wake up, man! Listen, I got a story... I'm gonna tell you a story that is gonna keep you awake for another month! So when you go down there, you'll be a wreck. - Feet up! Hurry! - Come on, man, come on! I'm gonna tell you a story that's gonna bug your eyes out. I went to a mixer at Barnard College, you know, the girl's college attached to Columbia? One of those deals where you pay your 75 cents to walk in. Well, I walked in, man. I've never seen so many ugly girls in my entire life! Valley of the Dogs! It was unbelievable! So I walk up and say, "Hi, my name's Lloyd. What's your name, baby?" And she says, "Joanne," just like that, man. Unbelievable voice. But, what the hell, I might as well give it a try. So I say, "You wanna dance?" And she says, "Sure, I'd love to." Just like that, man. Really unbelievable. So we get out there and I'm doing my funky Broadway. I'm really working my show and she's just standing there twitching. And I say to her, "Listen, baby, I can't take this anymore." Cos I just couldn't stand to look at her. I just couldn't stand to watch her doing that thing. So I say, "Let's go down to the West End and have a drink." She says, "Oh, I'm sorry, but I don't drink." So I say, "Come on, baby, you can watch me drink." We went to the West End, you know the bar there? Double bourbon, man. Wham! Right down the hat. I say, "Hey, baby, what do you want?" She says, "I'd love a glass of milk." Milk! She really dug milk, man. Three glasses. A buck and a half I spent on milk. Milk! Hey, you cats listening to me? Hey, come here! Bring him over here! After I watch her drink all this milk, I thought it was time to get out, cos I couldn't stand it anymore. I wanted to get her up to her apartment. I wasn't expecting much. But when you wanna get into a chick's apartment, you've gotta be subtle, you can't say, "Come on, baby, let's go to your place and screw." You gotta be subtle, you gotta be cool. You've gotta say, "I'd just love a cup of coffee. Know how to make coffee?" "I'd love to make you some coffee. Let's go up to my apartment." So, we went up to her apartment, and she made me this cup of coffee. It was mud, man. The worst coffee I've ever had in my entire life! Unbelievable! I say, "Let's go into the living room and put on a few tunes." And she says, "We can't do that, my roommate's in there." I said, "I don't care about your roommate." So we went in there, and there's this chick, Ethel, from Paramus, New Jersey. Ugliest chick I've ever seen in my entire life. She's sitting there, reading. So I say, "Come on, put on a few tunes." So she puts on a couple of tunes. I sit down on the sofa and leave room for her to sit down next to me. She doesn't do that, she sits next to Ethel on the other side of the room. And then she says, "Hey, Ethel, come here, I've something to tell you." And they have this 8th-grade whispering conference. God! Shades of the past! So, old Ethel, gets up and leaves the room, see. And Joanne comes down and sits next to me. So I figure something's really happening now. Joanne comes back with this can of stuff and she's flipping it up and down. And she starts turning out all the lights, know what I mean? Listen, I don't know if this is scaring you awake, but I'm gonna be awake for the next month and a half! Let's sit down. So old Ethel, she comes back and sits down... I mean, Joanne. She goes to turn off the light. Look at this. Look, listen! She reaches across me to turn off the light, and there's her boob, right there, sitting right... Wham! There it is, right there. Know what I mean? She turns off the light and then she leaves it there. She didn't back off. Just leaves it. Right there, man! And here I am, eye to nipple with this boob, you know. Outta sight! And Ethel sits down on the other side of me, and she's got this can, it's a can of whipped cream. That Ready-Whip stuff. Sprayed whipped cream. Oh, man, it was unbelievable! And old Joanne, with her boob, she just starts working on my chest. She starts undoing the buttons. Well, that's all, man, she's undoing my buttons. And Ethel gets down on the floor and she starts taking my shoes off. She takes off my shoes and my socks. Ethel and Joanne is up here and she's takes my shirt off. And then Ethel starts to go for the pants. Old Ethel, boy, she just sucks right in there to my fly. She unzips my fly. Pulled down my pants! She pulled off my underwear. Just pulled them right off! Oh, God! And then they stood up and took off their clothes, see. So there were the three of us completely naked. So I throw Ethel to the ground... Hey, come on, listen to this! I throw Ethel to the ground, leap on top and Joanne jumps on me. And there I am, in the middle of this bod sandwich, just like a... Ah! And then old Joanne says, "Hey, stop, wait! Cut it! Stop!" And I can't figure out what's going on! We went through all this. I take off my clothes and now they're telling me to stop? I can't believe this. So then they pull out the old whipped cream, see? And they stretch me out and they cover me from head to foot with whipped cream. Just spray it all over me and smooth it out. And then they start to lick it off. Just slobbering the whipped cream off my body. Old Joanne starts up at the neck and starts working down. Hey, come on! Ethel's down by the toes and she's working up, she's getting higher. And they're closing in on the D's in the middle of the chest. And they're getting in there and they're getting closer and closer together! And they get right down there and lick the whipped cream! They lick it right off my crotch! God! Greetings, greetings, greetings Wouldn't you like to go away? Greetings, greetings, greetings Come and see me, don't delay Spend a day or two with Uncle... Spend a day or two with Uncle Sam... Hey... What's that? It's a fake postcard that I made for an art magazine. Can I see? Superficially it's like one of those old fashioned postcards where you get a lot of views inside the other one. You lift the flap and the other things fall out. But that doesn't look like anything. Oh, I see... That's all the same thing, right? I got interested in the idea that... ...in a postcard of that sort, of that scale, it's very difficult to identify any of the elements in the picture. It's almost a question of relating these marks to each other. - You can't tell what anything is. - Yeah. But somehow the relationship of each mark to another tells me that it's people. So you blew it up to see if you could...? I made one or two paintings on this theme, taking large groups of people and then finding out what kind of information there is in there, when you go into it in some degree of concentration. This is like the movie, like "Blow Up". Like the huge... the way the guy blew it up. So I'm told. But I did this about 18 months before. - I did the painting 18 months before. - That's really groovy. - The painting is from this area here. - Yeah. What interested me about that particular frame was that, at the bottom of the frame, you can tell what the elements are. You can tell this is a boy, for example. Although it's just a smudge, it still remains... human, and you can even identify the sex. This you can even identify as a female, the relationship of that figure to that figure will let you know that this is a woman. This must be the mother of this figure. It's like a family group. The woman is sitting in a deck chair. That blob is a head. When you blow it up a good deal further, it looks as it's a dog or something. But it's just the relationship of these marks to those marks that'll tell you what's happening. I'm very interested in the Kennedy assassination, you know. And I've got my whole room wallpapered, practically, with photographs of the assassination scene and the Grassy Knoll and stuff. And this is just like that cos they're all blown up. And you stare and you stare, and when the picture's this big, you can't tell what's going on, you get no information from it. And then you blow it up like this, and you still can't see anything. It's all there, but it's not really there. You can't really see what's going on. Hey! What happened? Did you get out? - They said two weeks. - So you don't know yet? What did the psychiatrist say? Hey! - Well, it came out kind of strange... - What did they tell you? - I don't know if they believed me. - What did they tell you? - Two weeks! - Oh, well, man, you're out then. Cos that's what they told me. That's cool. - What did the psychiatrist say? - He didn't say a lot... - Come on, let's go home. I'm tired. - Let's go celebrate, anyway. Goddamn! Look, this thing I got from Life Magazine, see? It's a blow up and it's the Grassy Knoll in Dallas, just a couple of seconds after the assassination. Everybody's running towards the Grassy Knoll just after the shots were fired. And they're running right towards that guy, you see, that... Right next to the tree there, there's a guy in a white shirt. And they're all running next to him. And you know who that is? - Who? - That's Officer. And this is his buddy down here in the cop uniform running up to help him. That's a white spot that you can see through the tree. No, man. That's Officer. I'm sure of it, see, because all this... I know for a fact that the shots came from the front. What I want you to do is... I got the negative here. You take this and you blow it up, so I see that's Officer and he's got a gun, see? And I can crack this case wide open! You won't see anything but grains the size of golf balls! No, man! I saw the blow up. I know how this turns out, you can't see anything. - It's been blown up so many times. - Well, listen, Tina... - Will you just do it for me? Please? - OK. Look, here's the negative. It's number 69-17. - Alright? - Alright. - It'll take me a couple of minutes. - That's alright. I used to go around with that horrible Cindy Slater. - Yeah. - She was so ignorant. - Why? - Pushing her hair in her face. Chewing gum all the time! Just all of the time, she's chewing gum. It was just terrible trying to grow up with her. Wait, wait! There... - So what happened to her? - She ran off with your boyfriend. - Oh, not my boyfriend. - Wasn't it? - No, it was just an acquaintance. - I heard they became hippies. - Hippies? Me a hippie? - Well, no. You want a cigarette? Alright. Wow... This clearly shows that Officer was in the front and firing from the front with a Russian 6.76mm rifle, causing a neck wound in the President's neck, er... seven-eighths of an inch below the collar button. The Warren Commission just whitewashed it all over, just smeared it all over! But, look! You can see he's got a rifle there. See? Look! See? Look, it's right! See? The world and all its sides are fine When you're by my side I find the things you do a sign Your love's no farce and rhyme You cover me with rain and snow The softer moments sow the afternoon Like winter days turn into years Whose seconds go so loose and so slow Ah, so loose and so slow Ah, so loose and so slow Now, let's go The life we live here goes so fast It often passes by With you, it's sweet till the very last And that's the reason why You cover me with rain and snow It's often warm and so the afternoons Like winter days turn into years Whose seconds go so loose and so slow Ah, so loose and so slow Ah, so loose and so slow Alright, let's play it for the boys... "Fundamental attributes..." They have all these long words. "General characteristics." "Political viewpoints." They really run it down. "Physical appearance..." Do you think I'm unusually attractive or just regularly attractive? I don't know, man. Lie. You know Earlene Roberts, the plump widow that managed the rooming house where Oswald was living under the name of O.H. Lee? You get it? O.H. Lee? Lee Harvey Oswald? Right? - I never thought about that much - Man, it's all jive. "Philosophy of life values." "Had I the ability, I would like to do the work of..." They didn't want to catch him. He just drove right off like that. "It is perhaps too far-fetched to imagine "that they were giving Oswald some kind of signal "although it seems as plausible as any other explanation "to this bizarre incident." And then you see after Mrs. Roberts testified in Dallas, in April of 1964, she was subjected to intensive police harassment. Cops came around and bugged her at all hours of the night and day, and stuff like that. And they called up her employers and told her employers that she was the lady who ran the rooming house where Oswald was. She lost all these jobs, man! She lost four housekeeping and nursing jobs in April, May and June of 1964 alone! - Hi. Barbara Fuller? - Yeah? Hi, I'm Paul Shaw. I have a computer date. May I come in? - You're Paul Shaw? - Yeah. - Oh, my God, I don't believe it. - What's the matter? What a nice house you have. - Any other rooms? - No. - Where do you sleep, on here? - What do you care where I sleep? You walk in here and right away you wanna know where I sleep! I should've known! You really want to get to know me? All you care is where my bed is! - No, I care about other things. - Then, why'd you ask? Oh, I just happened to, er... You asked cos that's where your mind is. It's in the bed! Aren't you worried about your car being double-parked or something? No. It's not double-parked. I don't have a car. - You don't have a car? - No. Then how do you expect to get anywhere? Well, I walk or take a subway or a bus. - A bus? - Sure. What kind of bus do you know pulls up in front of El Morocco? - I don't even know where El Morocco is. - Then where do you expect to eat? - I ate. - You ate? - Yeah. - What do you mean, you ate? What kind of a date doesn't go out to dinner? I spend all day getting dressed, and all you wanna do is rip my clothes off. You're all the same! Walk in, off with the clothes and into the bed right away! Look at this dress. An original Arnold of Alexander's. All hand-sequined, 59.95! And the shoes... Socialite. "The shoe that starts the total look." - You see how they match the dress? - Yeah. Agilon stockings. "Pastel tones to gamble in." Two-fifty a pair! And my Technique girdle and matching bra. Slant seam to lift and mold. And did you notice? Living nails with Faberg glaze. Perfectly shaped and guaranteed chip-free for a week! And what the hell did you do? Throw on a sweater? Er, Lloyd! No, hold on a second. Listen to me, OK? No, just listen a second. Remember I was supposed to go on a computer date? Yeah... No, she was great looking. Yeah. But she's really not ready for me, and I'm not ready for her. And since you're one of my best friends, I figured maybe she'd be ready for you or you'd be ready for her. the President's shirt and tie. "Seven-eighths of an inch..." Now, President's head wound, President's neck wounds. "The autopsy of Bethesda Naval Hospital. "The hole was located approximately five and a half inches "from the tip of the right shoulder joint." Five and a half inches from the tip of the right shoulder... Five and a half... Now the arc, 17 degrees. "Approximately the same distance below the tip of the right mastoid process. "The bony point immediately behind the ear." Right there! Intersection... around the bullet hole. Bullet hole... Bullet went in there. Now... Put the shirt on and line up the holes. Angle of five inches... Ah, that's right! Over we go. Put the shirt on. The shirt... Put the shirt on. Turn over again. Come on, roll over. Roll over. Now... let's show the F.B.I. the street grade and the angle... Everything's wrong. The whole thing is a blatant falsification. I'll crack this case wide open. F.B.I., Hoover, liars... ...cheats, defraud the American public I know what goes on. The President was bumped off. Plots and lying and... cover-up. Man, nobody pulls the wool over my eyes. Not the F.B.I.! No, sir, boy, cos I'm gonna... I'm gonna show them a thing or three. Come on, come on. Come on, this is important. Now... now, five and three quarter inches below the... Five and three quarter inches... Bullet, right there. Now the neck... the bullet went in... A-ha! The holes don't match! The F.B.I. falsified the Bethesda autopsy. They said the bullet went in five and three quarters inches below the top of the collar, but Carico, who's a resident... Come on, this is important! Carico, who's a resident physician at Parkland, said that the bullet went in below the mastoid about five... right below the mastoid process there, see? Now, if the F.B.I. thinks that the bullet hole went in the back by the downward street grade, shot the bullet... 17 degrees, 30 minutes and 27 seconds, the President would've had to be standing on his head for the bullet to go in here and come out here, see? So that proves conclusively, beyond a shadow of a doubt, the F.B.I. was lying, see, they were covering up... Weisberg was right. The Warren Commission's a whitewash. Read all about it! Tells you where to get a gun, where to get an abortion, how to stay out of the army, how to desert the army if you're already in it, how to sneak onto the subway, where to steal food, how to go on welfare. Free legal aid! Right here, man! Hey, ever see a "Rat"? A "Rat" in every room! Scare the shit out of your neighbors! "Rats" right here! New York's new revolutionary newspaper. You ever see "The Rat"? It's out of sight. Check it out. - Is this an ad? - They didn't put it in. But we've been inverting the ads. We've been taking regular ads and turning them upside down. Here, I got some more. Check these, man. These are really out of sight. "The closer you get, the better you look." See, there's a Napalm child, close up. People don't even see this part in the ad at first, this Vietnamese family drowning. "Introducing a unique idea in men's shaving cologne. "Eenie, meenie, miney, mo, catch a nigger by the toe..." That's what they're saying. We're taking this ad and showing it the way it is. And we put a black guy in there with a rifle, cos he's gonna fight. We're gonna have a war right here. - Here? - Right here, man. A revolution. You ever see the Empire State Building? Empire State Building? Around the corner, the Colonial Theater. And across the street, the Empire - something - Mercury dealer. - Empire, Colonial! - What's wrong with that? We live in an empire. We have a colonialist system! A corporate capitalist power elite in the United States! - Yeah, they got it in every country! - No, General Motors runs the world! We'll put these on subways, the posters gonna scare the shit out of people. Take one. It's a "Rat". Pick it up at the news stand. It's 15 cents. - Yes? - Er... erm... er... - Judy Cavendish? - No. I must have the wrong apartment, sorry. - May I help you? - No, no... Where are your books of topical interest? Topical? You mean like current events? Yeah, they're right here. Right in here. You, er... you interested in the Kennedy assassination? Oh, no, no. Was that book that I was looking at about the, er... assassination? Oh, yeah, yeah. Look, it's brand new. - The Kennedy assassination? - Yeah, yeah. It's got all this stuff about the witnesses that died mysteriously. Karate-chopped and murdered and stuff. It's got about all the destroyed evidence, the missing frames and the Zapruder film, and the cut photographs, and it's got the new dope on Earlene Roberts. It's really great... Have you ever seen me before? No, man. Not unless you've been in here. Did you ever wear a black shiny suit? No! - Ever been in Dealey Plaza? - No, man, but I'd really like to go... - New Orleans? - No. No, man. Who's that woman? - I dunno, she's looking for a book. - Does she work here? - No, man, she's just buying a book. - Why's she watching us? She's not, man! She's looking at the book. Look, come over here by the dirty books. - Can you get that out? My wallet out? - Yeah. Take a look at that. - You must be related to Earlene Roberts. - Yes! Earlene Roberts is my aunt. My aunt Leenie. - Then, you know all about this. - I was there! I was there the day that Kennedy got shot. Why aren't you in the Warren Commission? Because I was only there for one day, then I flew back to New York. I was there! My aunt and I were sitting in the living room of her boarding house. We were drinking a Dr. Pepper, and all of a sudden, the news of the assassination came on the TV. We were watching, all of a sudden this guy, who lives in my aunt's boarding house under the name of O.H. Lee... Yeah, I know about that! He comes running in the door and up the stairs to his room. The next thing that happens, about fifteen seconds later, this cop car pulls up, stops right outside the house... - And they honk the horn. - Right! Tit, tit! Yeah, two times. Then they look out like they're looking for something. They look up at the building, 15 seconds pass, no more, and they drive off! The next thing that happens, about ten seconds later, this O.H. Lee comes down the stairs, out the door, onto the street. He looks up and down like he's expecting somebody to pick him up. - A signal. - Right. Nobody's there. He zips up his windbreaker, walks up to the bus stop and stands there. - Yeah, it was a signal. - Yeah, listen, I saw the cops! - I know who they are. I can identify them. - You can? - Yes! - You can crack this case! Who's that woman? - Ever see her before? - No. She's just... She's watching us! Do you know who she is? - No, I've never seen her before. - Yes, I can crack this case. Of course I can crack this case. What do you think I've been doing for five years? Look at this... Dealey Plaza. There's a plastic cast of the pillow that was used to smother my aunt. - Unbelievable! - You see? Why do you think I look so pale? Five years of this! Now, listen. I'm on the verge of cracking this case, but I need that book. - That book has the secret! - Well, go ahead and buy it. I can't! Cash register receipt, finger prints, evidence... - You notice I always wear gloves? - Oh. yeah. - Listen, I can't buy the book. - Well, then, I'll buy it. - No, you can't buy it! - Why not? Because they're watching us. They watch me every minute of the day. They're watching you now. I'm number seventeen. You know about all the witnesses? Sixteen witnesses killed? - Koethe with the karate chop to the neck. - Yeah. - And that dancer? - Hung herself. Right, with her toreador pants in the prison cell? Yeah. They're watching me, I'm number 17. - You're number 18! - What? - You're in this up to your neck, buddy! - They're watching us. I'm not kidding. Listen, I need that book. We can crack this case. - You steal the book. - I can't steal it! - The manager's there. I'll lose myjob! - Steal the book. - Who's that woman? - I dunno, she's just looking for a book. You steal the book for me and then give it to me after work. - What time do you get off work? - Five-thirty. - Where can we meet? - I'll steal the book. Steal the book, right. - Be casual. - I'll be casual, yeah. Oh, this is terrific. Hey! You got it? - Yeah. - Good. Good. - Listen, where can I meet you? - You gotta tell Garrison. - No! You know what happened to Ferry! - Oh, yeah, that's right. Ferry, that's it! Meet me on the Statue of Liberty Ferry, Battery Park, tomorrow at 9 o'clock. - Great. - First ferry. - At the east end... - Right! What are you doing? Greetings, greetings, greetings Would you like to go away? Greetings, greetings, greetings Come and see me, don't delay Spend a day or two with Uncle... Spend a day or two with Uncle... Spend a day or two with Uncle Sam Greetings, greetings, greetings Would you like to go away? Greetings, greetings, greetings Come and see me, don't delay Spend a day or two with Uncle Sam Hi, are you Cassandra Newton? I'm Paul Shaw, your computer date. - You're Paul? - Yeah. Of course. Come in, Paul. You have a nice house, here. What do you know about it? What do you know about anything? You're all over the place. Your mind is flitting around in all different directions. Close your eyes. - Feel the wall? Where is it? - Here. Oh, no. The wall is in you. You are the wall. There's no beginning, no end. It's all one. No, don't look at me. I want you to feel that. Can you feel it? - You, the wall, becoming one - Oh, yeah. Yes, that's good. Oh, no! You're jumping to the result. We've got to start at the beginning. The beginning of all energies. The source! - Do you feel that? - Yeah. That's very good. We've got to raise that energy out from that swamp, away from all those murky thoughts. All that lower force better go upwards with my fingertips. Do you feel it, moving upwards? Branching out in all directions. Raising up through the higher ascendance to the source of all life. Let it open up, through the lotus. Oh, do you feel that? yes, it's good. You are all powerful. You can do anything! No! I'm not ready! - Do you feel that? - Yeah. - Do you feel that throbbing? - Yeah. - Do you feel that rhythm? - Yeah. We two must become one rhythm. One music, one harmony. We're separate now. We've got to be one vibration. One great musical rhythm. One magnificent scale. Let it flow through you and into me, and through you and back. Yes, yes, you're feeling it now. You're becoming one with me. Very good! Very good! Yes, one rhythm! One harmony! One music! Oh, lovely, lovely! Very good, very good! You've achieved the result. I feel you know now, you know. We are one. One great beautiful energy. Now let it bring you forth. Take you to the mother of all energies: the Earth. Terracotta! Let it take you down with it. Let it bring you. Come. Yes, that's good. Oh, you've learned. Come. Let it bring you. Let it bring you forth. Oh, very good, very good. Your source! What's happened to your source? "The ideal, of course, is to see an attractive female "engaged in some sort of sexual activity. "As a group, peepers are persevering optimists. "In this way, they remind one of ardent fishermen, "undaunted by failure, and always hoping that the next time "their luck... ...will be better. "Just as the fisherman will wait patiently for hours, "so will the peeper wait patiently for a female to finish some... "...interminable minor chores before going to bed. "And then, likely as not, she may turn off the light before undressing. "Again, like the fisherman who keeps a list of areas "where fishing is especially good, the peeper, not infrequently, "has in mind a number of particularly likely places to which he returns." Hmm... Seventy-six... "Varieties of offenders. "A classic example is a man who was in his mid-20s when we interviewed him. "Timidity and an overwhelming fear of being rejected "kept him from seeking more heterosexual activity which he strongly desired. "His fear of rejection began, so far as he knows, "with a traumatic event shortly after he reached puberty, "and was experiencing the usual quick and intense sexual arousal "at that period of life. "Circumstances forced him to share a bed with his married sister "and he became extremely aroused and desirous of coitus. "Unable to express his wish, he simply showed her his erect penis. "She rejected him violently "and harangued him at length on how vile he was. "Ever since then, he had felt extremely awkward and hesitant "about approaching females sexually, "and every rebuff was excruciating. "He began peeping regularly." - How are you? - Sorry I'm late. That's alright. We missed the bus but that's OK. Gee! Hey, I want to thank you for helping me out at the book store. Oh, that's OK. I wanted to thank you, you helped me. You helped me because I was doing research at the bookstore, and so... - You don't work at the bookstore? - No, I don't. I don't work. Oh. Actually, I'm working on a project, doing research, and I was watching you there, that's why I was on the mezzanine. 'And I noticed you doing these things and you were so interesting to watch.' Well, I'm studying people and when you took the book, it was amazing. It was just beautiful. It was what I call a private moment. I study people like this, you know. It's like a moment where people are really with themselves and doing things which are a private moment. A private moment? What's that? Well, for example, have you ever been in...? Like, in my apartment, when I walk around, I look into the backyard, I don't intentionally, but there happen to be a lot of windows that are open there, and I see people doing different things, like a man walking around, or a woman, or even a dog, doing different things. As a matter of fact, I was just talking to Clifford James about it. And Clifford agreed with me. You know who Clifford James is, don't you? - Oh, sure. - Yeah. Clifford James of the Whitney Museum, the curator. - Oh, yeah. - You know who he is, sure. Well, we were talking and Clifford's going to build a $2 million wing of the Whitney to house my show, as a matter of fact. And I want to show you what it is. Now this is one of my main projects, here. Now, let's see, where's the... where's the switch? Oh, here. - You hold that like that. - Oh, it's a projector. Yeah. OK, now just hold it like that. Hold it there. Hold it. What happens is, when this goes on, it goes through this window here, and there's a telescope which someone looks through, and they see a private moment in this glazed glass window here. This is a hotel, right? And this is a pawnbroker. It's a very lonely place. And a woman comes home after working, she's very lonely, she's sad, working for nothing. Nothing to look forward to. And the woman I was thinking of for this was, er... was you. - I was thinking of you. - No kidding! Yes. And you know what the name of this is going to be? - You've heard of Pop Art? - Yes, sure. Well, this is called "Peep Art". "The Peepers and the Peeped". - That's great! - Yes. So I would like to use you, because after watching you, you were so fantastic in the bookstore, I'd just like to use you. - Thank you very much! - This is the camera I'll use, right here. - I've had movie experience. - Oh, you have? Last summer, I did a couple films on the beach and they were very good. That's very good. And also I was member of the National Thespian Society in high school. I was recording secretary and I did lots of leads. I did King Lear in Lear. I did the King. "Blow, wind, blow! Crack your cheeks and blow!" That's great. Look, there's a cab coming, we better go! - Let's get started. - OK. Alright, now, is that what a girl would do, a woman alone would do, at that point in the room? Well... Would she get on the bed with her coat on and her scarf? - Oh... Yes, cos I'm alone, right? - Right, you're alone now. Yeah. - I'm tired and I'm alone. - That's it, now... Maybe, don't you think you should take your scarf off and your coat... - Oh, yeah, I'll take my scarf off. - ...before you go to bed? Right. A-ha... Yeah, now take your coat off. Throw your scarf on the floor and throw your coat on the floor too. - Just like this? - You're tired, you've had a hard day. - I don't care if I hang it up or not. - You're alone. It's... Remember where you are. Look... Look out the window and you see the lonely pawn shop sign, and people, it's raining, an old man with a beard and a beat-up coat. This is very sad. You've had a hard day. - Oh! - That's it. - So sad... - No, don't talk! Remember, now, you're thinking all these things. Now I know... Remember this is a beautiful, private moment, and I am someone who is recording this for you and making you see it. Remember what we were talking about? Think all these things. I'm gonna tell you all about this after. At the moment, just think about these things and do them. Now take off your coat and throw it on the floor. Oh! - That's it. - Oh... That's it. Throw it! Ah, that's good. - Now, take your brush. You have a brush? - Yes, I have one. No, don't talk to the camera! Don't talk to the camera. Don't look at it! - Oh, I take my watch off first. - Right, take your watch off. - Well, here it is. - That's it! Take your watch... - Now, listen, get your brush. - Yeah. Now come and look out the window and look quickly. - The camera's running out of film. - I'm so alone. - Come and look out the window. - Oh, alright. - Get your brush. Right. - I'll take my shoes off. Take off your shoes. That's it. That's it. Now kneel on the bed and look out the window. - And comb your hair. - Oh... Ah... that's it. Now look at the window. Look at yourself in the window and pucker up your lips and go... like that. That's it. That's it, yes. That's it, that's it. OK, now, don't you think you're hot? Don't you want to go to bed now? - Oh, I'm tired. - Yes, you're tired. - I'm tired and alone. - Shouldn't you take off your dress? - Sure. Take it off. - My dress? Remember, this is a private moment and no one is watching. And this is one of the beautiful moments, so don't worry about it. Just take it off. No one cares. I don't care. I'm just recording this beautiful moment to show to you later. Now, go ahead. That's all. That's it, take it off. - That's it. That's it. - Oh! And when you take your dress off, just throw it on the floor. - You're tired, you wanna go to bed. - I have to unbutton it first. - There's a lot of buttons. - Ah... Yeah, that's it. That's it. That's it. OK, now take it off. That's it, take it off and throw it on the bed. - Hurry up. We're running out of film. - I wouldn't throw it on the bed... - What? - It would get wrinkled. - Hurry up. - OK, I'm unbuttoned. - That's it. You shouldn't talk, though. - Oh, I'm sorry. Throw it. That's it. Now, throw it wildly. Wildly. That's it. - Now lie down, lie down. - Lie down? You're so fatigued you can't even take the rest of your clothes off. - So tired. - That's it, that's it. No, lie down. That's it. Lie down and close your eyes. - Hold it, we ran out of film. - OK, I'm sorry. - So let's start again. - Alright. Now, you're very tired. You wanna go to sleep. Now, is that the way you'd go to sleep, Linda? - You mean, is this the way I sleep? - No, right? That isn't the way you sleep. No, I don't have anything on when I sleep. Of course, you wouldn't have clothes on, right? - Alright. - So? Take them off. That's alright. Remember... You must remember that this is a beautiful moment. - And don't feel ashamed in front of me. - Alright. This is a recorded moment. That's it. That's very good. - Very good. - Oh! - Yes. - What do I do with the slip? Just throw it away. Throw it away. Now, let's do this a little faster. Yes, that's it, throw it away. Take off your stockings, that's it. - Oh... - A-ha! Yeah. Hmm... That's it. Very good. Very, very, good. Very imaginative. - Oh, thank you. - I can tell you have studied acting. Yes! OK, take that one off now. That's it. - Yes. - My hip bone is sore. Very, very good. Now take off your panties. We have to hurry. There's not much film in the camera left. - I'll take off my garter belt, first. - Alright, take that off. Yes. Yes. That's it, throw it away dramatically. - You're tired, it's lonely. - It's late. You have to get up early tomorrow morning, so you wanna get to bed right away. You have to start another dreary day at work. - Oh, it's so late and I'm so alone. - That's it. Now take off your... - Yeah? - Now, yes, alright, go to sleep. Now lie down, that's it, go to sleep. That's it, sleep, dream. Dream. That's... What are you doing, coming in through my window? ...ask a soldier why a person would choose the army as a career. This was a captain in the 1st Cavalry Division. And, primarily, our idea for this story was to follow him and his company wherever they went. And, er... it was like playing soldiers. It's pretty rugged out there, and it's hard. A lot of the times, as far as photography is concerned, my problem... Exposure, if you decide to grab something in a hurry, sometimes you guess. If the sun is out all the time, you're just lucky, it's more or less an even exposure. There's an incident later on in here, where we captured three Vietcongs, and I think I had 72-55 in the camera at the time. And when they went to search these prisoners, they brought them into a dark area of trees, and I said, "Bring 'em out in the sun." Beautiful. It's beautiful. It's beautiful and easy to get and everything. Yeah. - How'd you get it? - In a cigarette package. - Really? - Yeah. Just go down to the corner and yell, "Papa-san!" Yeah. - "Papa-san." - What is "Papa-san"? Everybody, all the guys are called "Papa-san". It's just like "Hey, man" in the United States, they say, "Hey, Papa-san." Anybody, man. Anything that's got a male vital organ, you call "Papa-san". They're stoned all the time... They're so happy. They get high and they say, "Now this is Utopia." - They smoke grass? - They chew nuts. They smoke grass, they shoot heroin, they get laid, everything. What do you think? They're people, man! They eat and drink. Well, they eat when they got it. They even eat when they don't got it, cos they go and steal it. They're wiped out so they're corrupt. Break into army places and steal things, sell them to people that'll shoot at them tomorrow... They sell them to the VC, bullets and stuff that they steal from us, who are there to fight for them, sell it to Charlie, get money, go out and buy rice, and then tomorrow, the bullets come back at them but they don't care cos they're all high. Everybody's all drugged with the fact they're going out again in a few days. Before you know it, you're gone anyway. Besides, all the cats are... ...wiping each other out, literally. - Literally? - Literally. You spend most of your time in the field? Yeah, mostly. There's this one cat... I don't even believe this. - He had his own private-owned pistol. - You're allowed to have your own pistol? Yeah, you can, but you have to register with the army. You can leave the States and get over there and... This chick wants to get laid. You can get so hung up on her. That's the same one. Oh, yeah, the pistol. So this, er... this guy came back in and went to this company party, and they had W.A.C.s there. There's a few W.A.C.s overseas. He was digging this broad and this broad was digging him, and along comes another cat. The other cat starts digging the broad and this guy felt so possessive that this was his woman, that he went and got his pistol. And he put it around like Wyatt Earp, tied it to his leg. And he says to the other cat, "Here I am." And the cat says, "Oh, yeah?" He goes back and gets his pistol and ties it on! And they stood there and went... boom! Cat got it through the neck, man. Paralyzed from the neck down, and then five days later, he died. They played Wyatt Earp, man, yeah. - Brought to you by Wheaties. - Did you see that? Yeah, I saw it happen. There's nothing I could do. Cos I'm not gonna take a shot through the neck for these cats. I was stoned anyway. Like cats There are so many young people Wandering to and fro Amusing each other with good lies Theyjust don't know where to go So many things to do, to hear So many places to go So little time, little time to know... The Lexington Avenue train goes by It always reminds me of your eyes If I were wise, I'd go away and stay there... Beautiful girl, huh? Yeah, she is. I noticed you watching her the last few minutes and, er... You've got a good eye, I'll say that much. You like girls? Sure... yeah. You know her? No. Well, not really. I... As a matter of fact, I met her at a party, but I don't really know her. - So you met her at a party? - Well, I didn't... - Actually, I didn't really meet her. - You didn't go up to her? Alright. - She's a good-looking girl. - Yeah, I know, she's really nice. Very nice. You'd like to bang her, huh? Hey! You can't kid me, I know. You're a regular guy, I'm a regular guy. - You like art? - Sure I like art. Yeah? You like things like that, huh? You know those things there? That's not easy to make, you know. It takes years of experience, putting things on top of each other. - You gotta go to school for that. - I know. It just doesn't come. I know, I happen to be an artist. - Oh, you are? - I mean, in my own way I'm an artist. - What do you do? - I, er... I do films. - Oh, really? - I make films and... write the script, yes. I, er... Do you go to movies? Er... sure I go to a lot of movies. - You do? - Yeah. What do you do for a living? Er... well, actually, do you know what Bookmasters is? - On 64th Street. - I've passed by there once or twice. Are you kidding? They have a beautiful collection of books. - Yeah, they have good books there. - Beautiful books. I got a book there a couple of months ago. I was trying to get it for six months at another place. Couldn't get it. "The Horny Headmaster". You know that book, right? By Richard P. Long. - No... - You're kidding? You should read it in your lunch hour. Beautiful book, it'll give you tremendous insight. Beautiful. - Gorgeous looking girl. - Yeah. I think she goes for you. What do you think of that? - How do you know? - I could just see. She's trying to avoid you, but there's something in her look that leads me to believe that if you went up to her... You shouldn't be so shy. You gotta go out, meet people. - Are you always that shy? - Well, yeah. You should go out, you should go to the theater. - You go to movies? - Sure. You do go to movies, yeah? That's beautiful. Cos I think they're a very good expression, a good outlet. Hmm... Ah, it's beautiful this time of year. It's my favorite weather. Makes you wanna go out. - What do you make, 75-80 a week? - I make even less than that. - Really? - Yeah. I've got something for you. A picture called "The Great Dane". It's about this beautiful, black, Great Dane, that just sucks right on this beautiful, gorgeous blonde. Eats her up alive. Gorgeous. Screws her... Everything! Such taste, know what I mean? Beautiful taste. It's not disgusting or anything like those... You know what I mean? You do. You're a regular guy. I've got this other one I'm telling you, forget about her. See this other one's called, "The Delivery Boy and the Bored Housewife". You follow me? Do I have to tell you any more? "The Delivery Boy and the Bored Housewife". I can't even describe to you that one. They usually go for a couple of hundred, know what I mean? I'll do three hundred. - Excuse me... - Ain't she gorgeous? Beautiful. Five dollars. Five dollars, OK? I carry them around in Coke boxes. - Things go better with Coca-Cola - Yeah, right. There's nothing that goes better with Coke than these, boy. - Five dollars a roll. - Five? Sit down with a bottle of Coke and these, and you have yourself a time like you never had. What do you say? "The Great Dane and the Bored Housewife". - Five dollars apiece. - How good can it be? How good can it be? I'll tell you how good it can be. Take a look at a couple of... just a couple of 'em. Go on. Nobody's looking. I'm looking, go on. Go on take a look. Don't hold it up. Take a look, just take a look. Nobody's looking. I can't see unless I put it to the light. Can I put it to the light a little bit? It's very good. It looks good. Looks good? What do you mean? It is good. What do you...? It's perfect. Where could you get this for five bucks? - Let me have five bucks. - Alright, look... Here's five dollars, give me the film. Thank you. Thank you. Bye. What are you doing down here? You gonna be inducted? - Talking to me? - Yeah, I'm talking to you, son. You like to sit like that on US property? Stand up. Attention! Stand at attention. Take that cigarette out of your mouth. Stand at attention. Come on. Attention! Stand at attention! That's it. Put your hair back. Come on, put your hair back. Back! That's it. Make a man out of you in the army. Come on, follow me! Hup two, three, four... I went there as a right-winger and I thought I'd get out this way. An extreme right-winger. I said I'd kill all these chinks every day... Well, I asked to see the psychiatrist, and he told me, "You're just a little overzealous, that's all." That's what he told me, "You're overzealous." And I said... Because, I told him terrible things, I said I wanted to kill fifty Chinese a day, if I was over there, I'd kill as many as I could, and I started swearing and showed him an arm band of a secret organization, a rightist organization that I belonged to, that I said I was the secretary of. And he didn't say anything, he said, "Well, don't worry about it." Cos he probably thought they could swing me in the other direction, kind of moderate... even it out, even me out. That'd even me out, alright. So could you take pictures of me, cos I need it for a passport? I'm trying to get out of the country. I'm not gonna stay here and do this... That way, a few months, a few weeks would pass and... - You're not feeling patriotic, huh? - No. - Well, why is that? - I don't know. Well, listen, I'll tell you what, I'll take your picture because... - No, no, not when I'm working. - Oh, that's good. Do you want a...? How'd you like to wear a hat? How am I gonna take your picture if you don't cooperate? What is this? You got on too much clothing. I can't take your picture. What's on your shirt collar, what is that? Loosen the tie. That's it! You do that and I'll take your picture. Fantastic. - You got great possibilities. - What am I gonna do? I can only stay out of the country a few months before they catch up with me. - I think you're terribly photogenic. - You do? Yeah. And I might be too, but I haven't decided. - Listen, erm... this is all too... - Oh, yeah. Listen, it's not going to be as bad as all that over there. I'd do just about anything for a boy in a uniform. This is Raymond Tuttle, your Vietnam correspondent, just off the Doc Trang supply route. The trucks you hear in the background are bringing United States supplies to our troops just below the DMZ. Behind me, in a seemingly tranquil swamp, is hidden a highly seasoned squad of Vietcong snipers, who's mission it is to shoot American convoy drivers, in an attempt to halt the smooth flow of supplies to our front lines. To counteract this threat, the United States has deployed a highly trained tactical group, whose mission it is to seek and destroy this enemy. I am with one of the members of this elite force today. - Private Jon... - Jon Rubin, sir. 1st Division, Special Forces, 2nd Air Cavalry... Well, what are you doing here, Private Rubin? Er... what am I doing here? - I don't know. - I mean in this particular area. Oh, well, in this particular... Search and destroy, sir. You seek out the enemy and destroy them, is that right? Yes, sir. For example, this whole area is heavily infested with Vietcong. - Vietcong? - Yes. For example, just looking at these bushes over here, the clump of trees... I would say that there are at least ten VC there. Ten VC in those bushes there? Except the only problem is you can't shoot there. I wouldn't. I mean they tell you to, to shoot at anyone, any oriental. But I just can't, cos perhaps there might be our allies, you never know. - I see somebody over there. - You're right. Private Rubin has now got the Vietcong in sight. He's got his... finger on the trigger. He's sighted down his scope. A white piece of cloth... Hanging up a white piece of cloth. It seems to be a kind of white... ...pants or something. Let me... Private Rubin is advancing up on the enemy. We're going to follow him. - Alright now, keep low. - Get down. Very quiet. Quiet, quiet. Keep that soundman down. Private Rubin has spotted his enemy again, down the scope. Oh, wait. Those aren't just any pants, they're women's pants. Private Rubin has just spotted a pair of women's pants. - It is a woman. - It's not the Vietcong, it's a woman. No, it's a VC, except it's a woman. Er... well, what do you do in a situation like that? Gonna have to kill her anyway. It's a VC, so his orders are to kill her anyway. She's in his sight, and I think Private Rubin is now going to shoot the VC. She's gonna be out of his sight... I think there might be more of them. Now, stay here. Everyone be very, very quiet. Stay here, don't make a sound. Keep the camera on her. Hey! Alright, up, up. Come on, up! Up! Over here, stand here. Right here. Here, up! Back! Ever been in a room? Do you speak English? You speak English? Do you speak French? Parlez-vous franais, huh? There's a window... You know a window? Fentre, huh? Smile. Smile. Pick this up like this. Good. Let me see. Sit, sit, sit. Alright now, you're sitting alone in your room, as if you're alone. Nobody's watching. Take off your shoes first. Take them off. Smile, smile. Smile. At the camera. You yawn. That's it. Just undo it. Open it up. That's it. 'Very good.' 'I'm not saying you never had it so good, but that is a fact, isn't it?' Greetings, greetings, greetings Would you like to go away? Greetings, greetings, greetings Come and see me, don't delay Spend a day or two with Uncle Sam Greetings, greetings, greetings I'm coming to make a small request Greetings, greetings, greetings You'll soon find I know what's best So be my guest, but you do what I say You do what I say... Great American welcome machine Is scantily colored in army green La-la-la la-la-la la-la La-la-la-la la-la la-la Greetings, greetings, greetings... |
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