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Gun Shy (2000)
"GUN-SHY"
Excuse me, Ms. Sieveking? - Thank you. - You're welcome. It's open. Sorry, I'm late. I'm not hungry. You're new here, huh? Sorry. Those foreigners still think I'm sexy. Put it on the table. - What's your name? - Lukas. Lukas. If you wanna fuck me, I'll do it for half price, okay? Okay. You know if Ms. Meffert's there? How should I know? Who are you anyway? I'm doing social service. I deliver meals. I see. Actually. I haven't seen the old lady for two or three days. Yeah, well... I've got a key. Maybe she's asleep. Just leave it here. Ms. Meffert? Could you get something to cut her down with, please? Quick! Let her hang there. She's a goner. What's in here? Ms. Meffert's meal. What's for lunch today? Mashed potatoes, vegetables and a beef patty. Anyway, it seems to smell strange, I come in, and the old guy's shit the bed. I just left the food there... Take care! Yeah, see you. - Bye! - Bye. - Bye. - Bye, take care. Have a nice evening. Same to you. - Enjoy it. - Thank you. Bye. Please, shut the door tightly. - I will. - Thank you. Hey! Hey! HELP ME! Hey, could you open the door? Could you open the door? Sure. Excuse me! Do you live around here? Could I stay at your place tonight? Stay over? Yeah... sure. What d'you think? Which one is yours? I'm sure it's not the black one. I sure wish I'd had one of those when I got started. Candles are somehow too hard. Not even creams will help. Bananas are no good either. I peeled 'em and put condoms on 'em. But they get so mushy in the condoms from all the friction. And that's no good either. Of course, you can use a cucumber. If you leave it lying around for a few days, it feels like a real cock. But then it gets all wrinkly and isn't very erotic anymore. My mother used to buy big pieces of beef tenderloin, and when she wasn't there, I'd sneak to the fridge... and take out a piece, warm it up, punch a hole in it, and then I'd stick my cock in it. That was really nice. Can I use your shower? Sure, but I only have a bathtub. What about water? Water? Sure, I have water. I'll take a bath then. Okay? - Can I use your towel? - Yeah, sure. - Is this okay? - Yeah, sure. - You got an ashtray? - An ashtray? Yeah... somewhere. Thanks. Careful! Sorry. Sorry. Do you really wanna fuck me? No! That's good. What's that? I got scalped once. Bullshit. Really? Yeah. When I was a kid I went sledding with my dad. There was a freight car at the bottom of the hill... that everyone rode under. But not me. I was chicken, 'cause I was too big. But my father really wanted me to do it, so I did. He always said I shouldn't be a coward. The problem was that my head got caught on a piece of metal, and they'd to sew on my entire scalp at the hospital... ...32 stitches. I don't know if you've seen this scar. I was 21/2 and it was the worst winter of the century, I wanted to paint Easter eggs, and the boiler was broken. So there was boiling water, and they had this velour sweater... It doesn't matter. In any case, I was... in the hospital again. Hey. Good morning. Lukas. Want some coffee? I have to get off here. Can I... can I see you again? Can I maybe have your phone number? I'll only give it to you once. 0-1-7-1-2-5-8-7-3-5-4 0-1-7-1-2-5-8... Isabella. Using someone's hair to stimulate them... means you enhance the perception of the nerves and senses. He took new shoes and hit me in the face with the shoes. Come over here and sit down. A customer? Not yet. And then he broke off the heels. He can't stand it that I'm bigger than he is. I'm so lucky you're here. Why don't you open it? Hungry? I have pasta with... No, thanks. I've already eaten. Too bad. I'll have to throw it away. Thanks. Put that crap here. You can find a knife and fork over there in the drawer. Underneath it. Why don't you want to go to the army? Well, that's one answer. I was a sniper. I don't have a bad conscience though. It was wartime. What kind of crap is this? Knuckle of veal in gravy, Bavarian cabbage and potatoes. Is he allowed to eat from the plate? As an exception. What a hungry dog you are! What a hungry dog you are! That's enough, Robbie. Come on. Come to Mommy. My little friend, eh? My little friend. - Hi, is Isabella home? - Yeah. - Who are you? - I'm Lukas. - And you are? - Jonas. - Hi. - Hi. Is Isabella home? I wanted to pick her up. Isabella? Yes, I have a date with her. I see, a date. And who are you? Oh yes, I'm Lukas, Lukas Eiserbeck. Hello. She's upstairs. Hi, Lukas. I'm almost ready. You can wait in my room. Rorschach test. - Do you know it? - No. You take a piece of paper, fold it, unfold it again... And then you drop ink on it. Then you fold it again. Then you unfold it, tell me what you see, and I tell you who you are. It looks... like all the others. Yes! Strange, isn't it? Read this to me. Come on. Places, place, stone, stones... Stones, brake, brake, sports, sports, place... Jonas? - I'll bring you something. - Something nice? Sure. - Bye! - Bye! Sporty, trip, travel, minute... Watch out, you'll hit a tree. Careful, duck! Yeah. Okay. Why are you here? Normally guys do their social service where they live. My father lives here. But you don't live with them. No, my dad has a new family. He doesn't even know I'm here. I wanted to leave my small town and go to the big city. My father left when I was 14. My mother married a few months later, 'cause she was lonely. Yeah. I gotta go. What? Why do you have to go? I just do. Bye! Masks on! That music's giving me a headache. Do we have to listen to that? What kind of fucking music is that? Are you whacko or something? I'm sorry I bothered you. I really didn't mean to. I'll turn down the volume. I've got a better idea; come on in and we'll have a beer together... and I'll make up for it, okay? Come on. You know, every year, I take a 3-week trip to North Korea. Have a seat. You can't imagine what a beautiful country it is. How friendly the people are, how clean the streets are. It's all so fresh, so unspoiled, so... so human. And who do we owe that to? Him! Kim Jong-Il! So, cheers! Cheers! Nice to meet you. These are cassettes of the German program from Radio Pyongyang. Is that a real snake? Yep. Snake whisky. A North Korean specialty. The snakes are bottled alive and spray their venom... in death throes. It's good for rheumatism. And for... yeah, you know... love. The dance of the rice peasant. Planting... washing... love... love... Come here. Look, those windows over there. Everything's dark. Everyone's alone. No one's doing anything. People don't believe anyone anymore, because there's nothing left for them to believe in. Their souls are totally empty. - Good evening. - Good evening. What do you have on your head? That's a night vision aid. You look like a single combat marine. All that's missing is your gun. So what? What're you doing here? Just swimming around a bit. I'm playing the dead man. I've still got this stupid thing on. Lukas, you're all wet. Come on. What kind of thing is that? Oh God, I'll take it off you. Come on in. Calm down. Come on, sit down. Come on, sit down. There... Here you are. No, not there. Here. Come on now. That's good. Hold still. Hold still. Come on. Now... calm down. Calm down, come on. That's good, that's good. You'll warm up quickly, okay? Lukas, is that you? The door was open. Where were you? Who... Who's that man? Would you give me a towel, please? Please? When I was in India I saw a dog that had lost 1/4 of its head. A clean cut right across its head. It was standing in Varanasi in a puddle, drinking. You could see the bones and all, but it drank as if nothing was wrong. 3 weeks later I met an Englishman who also mentioned a dog in Varanasi, that was missing 1/4 of its head. But he hadn't seen it 3 weeks before. He'd seen it 2 days before. You understand? That means the dog lived at least 3 weeks with 3/4 of a head. It must've hurt so much, but the dog couldn't know why. It's just a dog. Sometimes I don't know why it hurts so much. Hi, my name is Johannsen. Police department. Here. Are you Lukas Eiserbeck? Yes, what can I do for you? I'd like to ask you some questions. May I come in? Thank you. Sorry. Sit down. Thank you. Please, sit. You belong to the Germania Rowing Club? Yes, I joined a few weeks ago. Do you have a key to the boathouse? Yeah, sure. I sometimes train early in the morning when no one's there. Could you imagine that someone would steal a boat? No. Anybody can go to the club and rent a boat. Why would anybody want to steal one? That's what I'd say, too. But a boat was actually stolen from Germania. A racing skiff. What do you say to that? But the thief didn't get very far. He crashed into the first pier of a bridge, and the boat sank. So? And then he hightailed it. Or drowned. No, no, no. In that case, we'd have found the body, but we didn't. But... We have a witness who says he saw the man in the boat. So? Yes, it's really strange. Because the witness says that the man rowing was wearing... something on his head that looked like a night vision device. Could I have a glass of water? Yes, of course. Thank you. - Are you ill? - Yeah, I'm dying of cold. Yes, thank you. Now I'm kind of stuck. I mean... Who's going to be rowing around in such lousy weather at night, alone on a river? Wearing a night vision device. Do you have any ideas? No. On the other hand, maybe he wanted to carry out... an assault from the water. There are enough people living on the river... who might have enemies or people who envy them. Who's that anyway? Kim Yong... what's-his-name, the president of North Korea. Yeah? Are you interested in politics? No. Yeah, and he's just standing there, the president of North Korea. Yes. Look at that! That's strange, isn't it? A snake in a bottle of whisky. Someone found it on the riverbank. Do you know where it comes from? North Korea. They put poisonous snakes in whisky bottles. Strange, eh? Hello. Oh, it's you. Did you leave the door open? Yes. - Did you hurt yourself? - Well... - Are you okay? - Yes. Heinrich! Heinrich, how often have I told you, that thing isn't suitable for stairs! Why do you do kendo? You learn not to move your heart. To keep control. Not to run away, even if it sometimes hurts. As a kid, I couldn't sleep for months, 'cause our toilet was broken. My room was right next to the bathroom, and I could hear water splashing all night. I'd lie in bed, convinced that there was a stranger... who never stopped peeing. When I was a kid, I'd always wake up at night. My father was a salesman, so he was always on trips. We didn't have much money, so we had to rent out a room. It really bugged me, 'cos it was mine. So colleagues of my father would sleep in my bed, and I had to sleep next to my mother. And eh... Sometimes... I'd wake up and look through the keyhole, and there, sitting on my bed, was some fat guy in underwear, farting and playing with my electric train. So eh... Once when I woke up during the night I heard noises. My mother was gone, so I looked through the keyhole. I saw my mother in there with a strange man. When my father came home she hugged him as if nothing had happened. I've never told anyone that before. Really? Thanks. - Bye! - Bye! - See you soon? - Yeah. Bye! - Look, here comes Mr. Lukas. - Come on, we have to go. And don't be so sad. Come on, come on. Easy does it. Now come on. Hey, sweetie. You'll see, it isn't so bad there. I don't wanna go to a home. You're so alone here. You'll be with other people there. But all those people are sick. She won't need any more meals. You can't live alone. What about my food and my dog? Hello, Ms. Wessel. Please, sit down here. - I'll take your dog. - Don't take my dog! We have to. It can't go with you. - What about my dog? - Someone'll take care of it. - What about my dog? - I put the food in there. What about my dog? What about my dog? My poor dog! Okay, that's good. I don't want to! My poor dog! It'll be cared for. - My poor dog! - It's Okay. My poor dog! My poor dog! Eat up! - I don't want it anymore! - Come on. I'm not interested. Don't you see? - Going home? - Yes. Aw, come on. Leave me be! Okay? Oh, good evening, Mr. Eiserbeck. What a surprise, running into you. Nice neighborhood, huh? Yeah, I'd like to live here, too, but being a policeman... You know how it is. We earn peanuts. Yeah, nice neighborhood. What are you doing here? Well, you see... I can't get that thing outta my mind. That mysterious man rowing. I was sitting at home in front of the TV and... suddenly I got restless, and I felt I had to come here. Maybe he's planning something, that guy with the row boat. So I came here and... everything's quiet. Nothing special. Then I run into you. How do you think he'll strike? Who? I don't know either. I have to go. Take a look. Those bright windows. An easy target! No problem with a good rifle. I have to go! - Don't you want... - No, I have to go. Too bad. See you next time. Yeah, bye! Dad! - Dad! - Yes, I'm coming. Here you are. Brand new! And here. - Look at this, please. - Don't need any, thanks. Please, buy one. Please, buy one. Here, please. - Another nice one. - I don't need it! I was a parachutist. I parachuted over Crete. Those Tommys... They shot at us as if we were sparrows. They shot me in the air. Underneath my knee, upwards through the bone. That crap got stuck in there somewhere. A fucked-up landing, I tell you. I was lying there... with my face in the sand. And then a scorpion came along and stung me in the eye. - More? - No, thanks. Aren't you hungry? Does he force you? Oh yeah, harder. That's good. Do it harder. Hi, Lukas. We've been waiting for you. This is my neighbor. Have a seat. Nice to meet you. I've heard a lot about you from this dear lady. She told me a lot about you, a lot of very good things. And uh... now... you want to buy a rifle. What a coincidence. That's just great. I have several good rifles for sale. This really tastes good. Eat it up. I'm not hungry anyway. - Can I have a knife? - Yes, here you are. I have an excellent rifle for a good marksman. Really very good. Of course, you'll need a telescopic lens, too. I also have an excellent telescopic lens from Jena. Oh! - Would you like some coffee? - I really would, thank you. And you'll need ammunition, too. Hollow-tip bullets. Familiar with them? Hollow-tip bullets splatter. That's very good. Even if they don't strike the target in the heart... or in the head, the target is finished. Isn't that nice? I can really recommend hollow-tip bullets. Anyway, they're the only ones I have on offer now. CONQUER YOUR FEAR There is an invisible enemy, and that enemy... is fear. Remember your childhood. You're lying in bed. It's dark. Your jacket is hanging on a chair. Together, the chair and the jacket become a monster... which you're afraid of. Your fear increases, and you have to turn on the light. What has happened? It isn't the monster that makes you afraid, no. It's fear that creates the monster! Fear is the monster. The monster lives inside us. We create the monster ourselves, so we can also control it. It is our fear that makes the chair into a monster. Fear alone doesn't exist. Fear cannot exist without us. We know our fear keeps us from being happy. But when something stands in the way of your happiness, then rip it out of the way. Kill it! Cut off the monster's head! Do you know how I learned German? By reading Thomas Mann. Do you like Thomas Mann? Yes. We only had 2 books in our library, "Buddenbrooks" and "Magic Mountain. " I read them 20 or 30 times, and then I was able to speak German. - Hello! - Hello! Have a seat. And then I discovered Goethe. "Above all the peaks is peace, in all the treetops hardly a sigh you sense. Wait, soon you will know silence. " Isn't that excellent? I've brought you everything that you ordered. In excellent condition, really perfect. I have to congratulate you. You've ordered a very nice rifle, and I feel that guns can be just as nice as literature, art, Kokoschka. Well! A beer, please. Shit! Being a good shot begins with the way you breathe. You have to breathe rhythmically. And when you shoot, you hold your breath. Understand? Okay. Inhale, exhale... Inhale... exhale halfway, hold your breath... Let me show you. Give me that. Our target! You take the rifle and push it up tightly against your shoulder. Here. And you pull back here and here, so it's really tight. Put your cheek, your head down in line with the sighting notch and close the one eye. Now do it yourself. Now move your feet apart, in line with your shoulders. Yes! Steady! Move your right foot back a bit. That's good. You can't stand there like you're on the dancefloor. Head down, left eye closed. You see something? Yeah? The sighting notch? Stand steady, without moving. Okay. Okay, and don't forget to breathe. Now! Yes!! Hello! I thought you were Mr. Grinna. He's the hunter around here. But you're not Mr. Grinna. Are you a hunter, too? Yeah, I'm a hunter. A strange rifle. It isn't strange. It has a silencer for wild ducks. Exactly. Wild ducks. And who are you? I'm the shepherd. I look after the sheep. But there aren't any wild ducks now. It's too cold. Too cold. I gotta go. I gotta get moving again. Could you help me a bit? I can hardly walk now. My wife. The Tommys tried to court-martial her after the war. A half year later, she ran off to England with a military judge. I really loved her. That bitch. Know what's strange? Just at the moment when I... pull the trigger, I close my eyes. That was the mistake. There were soldiers who, even after 6 years of war, shut their eyes when they pulled the trigger. It's the fear of shooting. And you... are afraid to shoot. I'm not afraid. So... Thank you for coming, and... don't forget... conquer your fear. Well, what a surprise! You're here, too. Trying to get motivated? Well, that's not a bad idea. It's funny running into you here. I've been thinking a lot about you recently. It was quite an interesting conversation we had the last time... when we met by the river. I feel you're planning something. Of course, that's my job to collect clues. But I know you're planning something. Hey, am I right? Be honest. Yes, believe me, I've had a lot of experience. 20 years of working for the police is a long time. You know, I like you. It'd be best for you if I arrested you. I'm sure of that. But I can't. I don't have anything on you. Excuse me. Heart attack. Where's my boat? Too late. Your oar's already taken. Hey, Lukas! Hey, Lukas! Come back here! What's the big idea? Put that boat back in place! Hello, Isabella. It's me, Lukas. I just wanted to get in touch, 'cause... I've been looking for you everywhere, but you're... actually, you're never there. Maybe we could get together sometime. Call me back. Bye. Hello, Isabella. It's me, Lukas, again. I'm calling, because I have two things to say. First of all... I know what happened. I was there. And eh... And eh... second... I'm going to tell you something, and I hope you'll please call back! I got myself a rifle, and I've learned how to shoot, quite well actually, and I really wanted to kill him. How's your girl doing? I don't know. I don't know what she's doing. I'm sorry, Lukas. You look pale. Do you have a temperature? Bye. Good evening! No boat today? I've stopped rowing. Don't start getting lazy, young man. The water's coming in faster and getting higher every day. You'll see, it'll soon cover the entire surface of the earth, pure and virginal, like on the first day. Maybe we can play the dead man together. Someday. See you. Isabella! Are you coming, too? No, I'd rather go home early tonight. Isabella! You're still awake? Should I read to him? - Yes, please. - No, I'm putting him to bed. Good night! Sleep tight. SkyFury |
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