1
'
Yudi...
You know...
Nol
Yudi, I love you.
Ohl
I love you.
Huh?
Done?
I said "l love you".
What do you have to say?
Cool?
Baby, wait. Sweetyl
Come on...
Please don't complicate
the situation...
I'm complicating the situation
Where is this relationship
heading, Yudi?
Why does it have to head anywhere?
I mean... wherever it is, it is finel
No?
But...l thought you love me.
I do love... your vibes...
Your... face...
Your... energy...
I'm not getting it now,
but a whole lot of things about youl
I do.
Yudi, why do you
always run from love?
I know you feel something inside.
I... I just know there's
more depth to you.
Actually, that's not true.
What you see is what it isl
There's no depth
and stuff to me... maybe.
I don't think so.
Sorryl
Idiot.
We can still be friends...
All men are dogs. It's true.
And, there are two types of dogs.
One, the pet dog,
Which lives and dies, eating home food
and riding in the backseat of the carl
Two, the stray dog,
Which has no home or address,
eats what it wants,
sleeps where it likes..
The whole city is its homel
But the problem is,
we spend half our lives...
figuring out which type we arel
Yudi...
You know...
I love you.
Umm...
Jerkl
Okay, fine. Me too.
Me tool
- "Me too" what?
Me too...
Okay, fine. Just go.
I don't have a problem
with "l Love You".
It's with the baggage
that comes with itl
99% of stories end at "l Love You".
Do you know why?
It's the beginning of the endl
It destroys everything.
It all goes to crab.
Love looks nice only in movies.
The edit out the extra parts.
And only show comedy, romance, songs.
The hero kisses the heroine.
And what happens next?
Happy Ending?
Hey?
Is that you?
I love you.
Is there a happy ending in life?
If there's one,
then when does it happen?
After love?
After marriage? After children?
After divorce?
After death?
Is death a happy ending at all?l
Actually, there no
happy endings in lifel
There no
happy endings in lifel
we'll down two Yeager bombs each
then order an entire pitcher
and settle down.
Next we go to Edison.
Bucket of Chicken ...and
we start the real drinking...
Then you'll vomit your guts out...
and I'll deliver your body lo your
home and apologise lo your wife...
Correct?
Don't kill my buzz, brahl
I rarely get a chance to get outl
Did you get permission from Gauri?
The application is in process.
Montu, what's taking
so long in there?l
Baby, I've a bit of a problem today...
Montu, don't lie.
You're on the phone, aren't you?
Come, look for yourselfl
What look for yourself?l Come out
fast. You are in there since an hour.
Listen... we'll discuss
the rest when we meet.
Hold on, Montu,
I am getting another call.
Ohl
It's Vishakhal
Why is Vishakha calling you?
I thought you two broke up?
Well
Yudi... cutie... I love you.
Ohl
Cutie...
Oh, you don't have to say anything.
I know you love me too.
I can see deep inside you, babyl
So she doesn't know
you've broken up with her?l
She thinks you're still togetherl
You're gonna die trying
to run away from herl
Montu, will you come out
or should I come in?l
Okay, don't-kill-my-plan-donW-be-late.
Okay, bye.
Hi, Yudi... Culiel
Hey, Vishakha.
Where are you?
I'm... at home...
Perfectl I am coming.
Why?l
To meet youl
Vishakha,
I have an important meeting today.
This is not a good time for me.
Can we meet tomorrow?
Wait for five minutes.
- Five minutes?
I am almost therel
Cutiepie.
Hello.
- Hi.
I am leaving now, I am very late.
Call me later.
I've reachedl
- I've lel
But your car's still here.
- I am taking my cycle.
What? You're riding
a cycle to your meeting?
What kind of a meeting is this?
Hold on for a sec, please.
Yudi...
Hey, kid...
Baby, I need to ask your
permission ten times to go out oncel
I think you love Yudi more than me.
Baby, please don't start that again.
Why don't you go out
with your friends too?
I don't have any friends.
Then... that's not my fault, is it?
No.
You go... party hard...
I'll manage all the chores
around the housel
What's left to do?
- Did you pay the mortgage?
Yes.
- Cable bill? Mobile bill?
Done. And donel
Car servicing?
- Yes.
I knew it, otherwise I would've
never even thought of going outl
And the shelf?
- Huh?
Can I do it tomorrow? Please.
Promisel
Baby, that's done too. It's all donel
Hold on.
Hello.
- Hi Montu.
Yes, Yudi.
- Are you coming or not?
No, I can't come. Sorry.
You know...l am really busy.
No problem, Montu.
No, don't force me please.
It's no use.
No worriesl Just chill. Bye.
You go have funl Alonel Okay?
Without me. Bye.
Okay. Byel
Poor guy was in tearsl
- Cut the dramal And go.
Huh?
No, no. What will you
do alone at home? - Just go.
No, I'll fix this and them.
- I said, gol
Okay-thanks-l-love-you-byel
See this beer mug. This is my wife.
And all these drinks... are the
rest of the girls in the worldl
And this?
- Peanuts?
Pea?l
- Nutsl Peanutsl
Oh Peanutsl
I left all these girls...
and married this beer mugl
Do you realize how
big a sacrifice this is?l
How huge a commitment?!
- Thanks.
But see, Montu. These are all emptyl
And your wife's so fulll
Heymthafs my wife
you're talking aboutl
She's like my sister.
You know, I'm really jealous of you.
- Why?
6 years ago you wrote one book.
And thanks to that,
you're picking up chicks to this dayl
5 1/2, okay?
And what do you think,
I get girls because of a book?l
Of course.
You're no studl - Whatever, dude.
Tell me something, why aren't
you writing your next book?
Why should I put the effort?
What does one want in life?
Fame, money, girlsl
I have everything.
What's the point of
forcing myself to work?
Wowl
You're so clear about your lifel
We've wasted enough time already.
I have to party hard,
and drink harderl
Montu, don't be hectic dude.
Come on, Montul
Montu, that's enough.
Let's go, please.
We still got time, bro.
Keep dancing, keep moving.
It's closing time.
The lights are on.
Just open and close
your eyes repeatedly...
You'll feel like you're in a disco.
Come on, get up.
Gentlemen, if you can exit
towards the rear. Bar's closed.
Absolutelyl
Come on, Montu. Let's go.
Montu, stop dancing around him...
Sir, let's go.
Come on. Come on.
Come on.
Okay. Okay.
Gross, Montu.
Hey Yudi, I can see a French fry here.
Get some ketchupl
Buzz off, Montul
Yudi... Yudil
Heyl That's my carl
Heyl
What are you doing?
- Hey, is this your car?
Yes.
Look, you haven't made
any instalment payments
...in the past 6 months.
And we're seizing your car.
What? You can't do that.
- You got questions, call this number.
Looks like it's been
re-possessed by...Rack Publishingl
For failure to honour your contract.
Sorry, man.
Hey, watch the...
For our newest best-selling author.
Aanchal Reddy.
Thank you.
- Congratulations.
Nice to meet you.
Sir... Sir, you cannot go in there.
Excuse me for a second.
Iam really sorry, Yudi.
- Bastardl
It's been 2 years since
you took an advance
...from the publishers.
And you haven't written a word.
Thank God they took your car,
not your housel
I'll return their goddamn moneyl
What's wrong? No money in the bank?
Fine, let's break some funds.
No funds either?
Nothing?
Look, you WERE a successful author.
But your last book
released 6 years ago.
5 'A.
- Correct, 5 'Al
Royalties stopped 1 'A years ago.
Your books are no longer in stores.
Ballsl It's available at
the bookstore close to my house.
Why would they keep
it if it doesn't sell?
I had them kept there..
Just u make you happy-
- What?
Oh wowl
Take care.
Thank you.
It was nice meeting you all.
I-Ii!
Who is she?
- Your dooml
Rack Publishing signed her after
cancelling your contract. - What?
They've given her a 3-book deal.
- What?
And they're also paying
her double. - What?
Why are you on repeat-mode?
But how? Why?
She's smart. Writes well.
Maybe... even better than you.
And she doesn't have your attitude.
Plus, she writes romantic novels,
which always sells.
She got the contract because of you.
You made her.
I hope you're happy... with your fame,
money and boozel
Girlsl
- What?
Fame, money and girlsl
Not booze, I am not Devdasl
What now?
Read this.
You might learn something.
Crazy Heartsl
Crazy Fartsl
What?
Reay?
- Yeahl
When? How?
- What do you mean, how?
Are you sure?
- Are you serious
I was travelling all of February.
Then how... is it possible?
Didn't you come down
one Thursday for that meeting?
But we don't do it on weekdays.
- We did it that day.
Correct... shit
I mean... so sweetl
Baby, come here.
Baby?
Baby, what happened?
Baby, what happened?
Baby, I am actually really happyl
It's wonderful news. Superb news.
Yayl I am going to be a fatherl
Yayl
Life was such a party.
What happened all of a sudden
Downfall is always suddenl
Are you going to cry?
- What? No.
Good.
But we need money.
We need to do something.
Not us, you...l
Thanks.
Hey Yogi, sit with me.
Talk to me.
About what?
About life.
I'm busy.
Don't do it.
What?
- Don't call Divya.
Why?
Look... men go crazy
between 12 and 4 am.
They over-commit, get sentimental.
Cry and weep.
And settle for anyone.
Basically,
they start thinking from their pants.
Then comes morning,
and they come to their senses.
Next comes remorse.
That they are in more
trouble now than when they startedl
But it's Divyal
- She's your ex, and married.
She has three kids.
Actually, they are triplets.
So, counts as one.
See, Yudi.
You will do what you want to do.
My advice...
...is don't do.
Hello.
- Hi.
Yudi?
- Are you sleeping?
It's 2 am.
- Can you open the door, please?
What?
You're kidding me.
What are you doing here in
the middle of the night?
I'm in a mess.
I'm broke.
Ohl
You need money?
No...l just wanted to
talk to someone.
Where's that girlfriend of yours?
It's a bit complicated.
I mean, I've broken up with her.
But I don't think she's understood.
Did you tell her clearly
or is it all just in your head?
I've given her few hints.
Some things never change.
If I lell her directly,
it will break her heart.
What a thoughtful jerk.
You know what your problem is?
You love the fun that
comes with romance
...but not the responsibility
that comes with commitment.
What's so wrong with that?
I mean all relationships are
fun and exciting in the beginning.
Later, the mystery's dead
once you know each other.
And all the excitement
and romance disappear.
We covet commitment so much
that we ruin what we have.
And what remains?
Fights, battles,
family, her mother's birthday
...his uncle's anniversary,
baby showers..
Then you have three kids.
And that's the end of lifel
Shut up, Yudi.
- Papa, I need to go potty.
Mummy..
- It's called lifel
Whatever, dude.
Couldn't you wait
for me a little longer?
Why are we discussing this now?
I did wail, you know.
A really long time.
Hey, remember..
...our Vegas trip?
- Yeahl
Mad trip, right?
- Let's just wipe that off memory.
And our matching tattoos.
You know, mine's faded a bit.
- No, no, it's okay.
Don't take off your pants. It's okay.
And yours? ls it fading too?
Nol Mine's great.
You still have it, right?
Yeahl
You didn't get it removed, did you?
You got it removedl Why?
What do you mean, why?
If Jason saw it, what would he think?
Yudil
- You could have made up somethingl
He can't read Hindi anyway.
Let me see what you did.
No. - Show me.
- Yudi, just stop it. - Show me.
What is wrong with you?
What the hell is going on?
Hi, honeyl
Who wears pink shorts, dude?
If you break my marriage,
I will kill you. - Okay, okayl
Here we gol
Thanks.
But you really didn't have to do this.
I could've taken a taxi.
- Why taxi?
I am your personal, sexy, chauffeur.
Okay.
I'll be awhile. You go ahead.
It's okay,
I've cancelled all my appointments.
Shall I wait for
you at the coffeeshop?
No, no, please don't wail for me.
Gary will drop me home.
Baby. I can wait for you all my life.
Isn't that a bit too long?
Yudi, forever and everl
So sweetl
Love you.
I know you love me too.
Hi, Yudi. How are you?
How is life treating you?
Cut the bullshit, Gary.
Why did you call me here?
Look, maybe this isn't the best
But this is all you have now.
And I think you should do it.
You got me some shady deal again?
Do you want the car back or not?
I liked your book.
What was the name again?
- Operation Payback.
Yes. Operation Playback.
Payback.
- Yeah, right.
The story's good, tight.
The second half is a bit slow.
You read my book?
- He did.
And explained it to me in two lines.
Good. - Very good.
You see,
I am a single-screen superstar.
And now,
I want to take over the multiplexes.
I want to make a film..
That has everything.
Romance. Comedy.
I want a romedyl
Two birds with one stone.
What?
Classes and masses.
Get them both.
- Great ideal
Writers are such copycats nowadays.
They make a dozen films
with the same successful idea.
Someone's remaking
this hit South Indian film.
Now everyone's working on
the same idea.
That's the business. - But, Sir,
Why don't you sit here
instead of me? - Sir,
No, no, I'll go get a message.
You sit here.
- Sorry, Sir. Go on.
Last night I saw this Hollywood film.
And it just clicked.
I knew then this is my gold standard.
I took the next flight here.
Now, I'm looking for a mixed writer
...who can write a Bollywood
film, Hollywood-style.
Mixed writer? Great idea.
Money is not a problem.
I want to make a film that has
Comedy, flirting and steaminess
Kickassl
Kickass?
- Kickassl
Kickassl
Oh Kickassl
First half, Meet Parents.
Second half, Meet Fuckers.
Mix and match. We have a silver jubilee.
Look, Armaan,
Ji..
Armaan-ji.
These are famous films.
We can't just copy, I mean
We'd get caught.
So what good is he for?
Get creative, man.
So what if we're caught?
It's your neck on the line.
But I'll get you out.
- We will.
Can I tell you something, Armaan?
You spent a fortune coming
here, and you're with the best writer.
Let's get him to write something fresh.
Where are you from originally?
I am from San Francisco.
No wonder.
Listen, do whatever, but
I want a young love story.
- Consider it done.
He'll write a great story and
make you a ladies' heartthrob.
In fact, I say you'll be
the heartthrob of the gents as well.
Control, your emotions.
And, oh yeah, I spoke to
Jennifer, for an item song.
Jennifer? - Our Jenny from the block?
JLo. JLo.
Sorry, my bad. JLo.
Jennifer.
Just make sure the film
is a worldwide blockbuster.
Done, Sir. I guarantee you.
Kickass.
Kickass.
- Kickass.
Sunglasses?
Here you go, Sir.
Superstar. Heroine.
JLo.
Romantic comedy.
Classes. Masses.
Bollywood.
Multiplex.
Single screen.
Kickass.
I am so screwedl
Where do I get this kickass from?
What am I there for?
What do you know about romcoms?
Romantic comedy? Very easy.
First, boy meets girl.
They cross paths, just like that.
They're polar opposites
but complete each other.
Then, conversations.
Hello? But why? Because you..
And then Lovel Lovel Lovel Lovel
But, all boys are doggie.
And all girls are not doggie.
Something goes wrong.
Then comes "l've changed.
I'm completely sorry. I love you".
In the end, everything's happyl
But yes, the boy and
girl should be handsome.
Costumes by Manish (Malhotra),
Abu Jani...
Music by Pritam.
And if you go abroad
to shoot them, great.
That's how you write a romantic comedyl
"And this is the secret
only true lovers share."
"The joy they find in each other,
and the dreams they dare to dream.."
"..is by virtue of the
power of love that engulfs them."
"Consumes them.
And transcends all bounds."
"So her thoughts were exactly this."
"Love me..and free my soul."
"l love you..and I adore you."
"And I do this
because I do not know.."
"..any other way of loving."
"And I am just thankful."
$1 What lheul
Thank you.
Beautiful writing. Beautifull
That last chapter
tears just welled up.
I was really choking.
Thank you. Thank you so much.
I'm the one who wrote it.
But every time I read it,
it still makes me emotional.
It's my favorite chapter.
Mine too.
You've read my book?
- No.
But I will now.
For sure.
- I hope you like it.
Incidentally,
what kind of books do you like?
I like all kinds of books.
Put a telephone directory
in front of me, I'll even read thatl
Have you read this book?
I hear it's really good.
That's a really old book.
It's still on the shelves?
Well, it's a classic.
Classic? Why, there's no depth in it.
He wrote something. And
he just got lucky.
You just said you
like all kinds of books.
What's so wrong with this one?
It's just a one-book wonder.
He wrote something for the heck
of it and it became a hit. By fluke.
My agent said he's totally ruined.
Poor guy's on the streets now.
Should I sign you a copy?
Your name?
- Yu..
Yogi.
Yogi. See you.
Hang on a second.
Half of them fell asleep listening.
Actually, I almost
fell asleep readingl
You know, I don't get it.
Why do people show up at readings?
Clearly, they have
nothing better to do.
If they love books, why can't they
just buy the book and read it at home?
Omigodl I forgot to tell you.
After the reading,
an Indian came up to me..
And said, "Beautiful
writing my eyes welled up..
"..L was choking..
Really choking."
What a pansyl
I know right?
I'm actually writing
all this romantic bull..
Which people are buying..
And getting sentimental,
can you believe it?
I knowl
If anyone hears me like this
That's it. I'll be banned.
Hello. - She's a fraudl
That girl is a fraud. And she
had the gall to criticize my bookl
Yudi, I am pregnant.
She's selling rubbish and she knows it.
Her readers are all a big joke for herl
Man, I am the joke here.
I'm going to read her book..
Throw it on her face and say
"This is nonsense."
I am having an oops baby.
- What?
Oopsubaby.
Oopsl
Congratulations?
Montu?
This is our Wall of Fame.
All bestselling authors.
And here you are.
Got it put up just yesterday.
How is it?
Cool, right?
- Yeahl
What a roguel
Oh..
Ohl
We meet again.
I read your book.
- I see.
Mind-blowingl
The way you've explained love..
And that line, "To gain something,
you have to lose something."
What an original linel
Every page had me emotional.
I sat with a box of tissues
I know who you are.
- Really?
I saw your photo upstairs.
Gary told me all about you.
Ohl
Oh?
I hope he said good things.
He said to me, "You could
be very successful
"Just never Yudi your life."
That ldiotl
Hold on. Did he say
this or are you saying it?
What is your problem?
Why are you following me?
I am writing a romantic comedy.
And I thought I'd read your book.
And guess what I found out
You are a fraudl
- What? What do you mean?
"If anyone hears
me like thisu"
"..l'll be banned."
- Stop it.
"L such am a big writer now.
All of America has read my book."
"My agent says I am No. 1."
"What I didn't know is that agent
...gives this spiel
to all his clients.
By the way, you write well.
But I have to tell you one thing.
Your book readings are so boring..
That people were falling asleep.
I'm sure some even died.
- It's okay.
My books sell.
Yes, but the question
is entertainment.
How do we make your
readings more entertaining?
You don't need to do anything.
I'll manage.
How about some advice from a senior,
super successful writer
to a budding writer?
- No, thank you.
Shhl Just listen.
People aren't there for
your reading skills, you know?
They're there to meet the writer
- see if his personality is exciting..
...all his experiences in life.
What, should I read out my biodata?
- No, but be charming.
Chat with your audience,
crack some jokes.
They'll read your book at home.
So for one hour,
spend 15 minutes reading.
Nonsense your way
through the remaining 45.
That's how you make fans.
One second, who are you?
Best-selling writer, friend,
philosopher, studl Nice to meet you.
Pleasure is all yours.
Yudi-pudie piel
- Aaarrghhl
What are you doing here?
- Giving you a lift.
But...why..
How did you know I'm here?
So I downloaded this app
on both our phones.
Il tells me where you are. Always.
It's called No Spacel
Are you tracking me?
- I love you.
Come on, let's go.
- Where?
Where?
Happy birthday 10..
Oh nol
ls it your Dad? Mom?
You had an appointment today.
- What appointment?
Dentist?
- Oh no, no, I'm fine.
Don't be a baby. Come on.
Pleasel I don't want to go, Vishakha.
Listen-
You've done a lot for my teeth.
But this time, I'm okay. Reallyl
I have to say, this Aanchal girl?
I dig her.
She's just right for you.
Whatever floats your boat, man.
Wowl What a fluke.
- Your birth was a fluke, man.
And Vishakha?
- Oh, yeah.
I've got to break up with her. Again.
This time, I'll do it right.
Here I am,
frikking about to be a Dad
there you are, playing
breakup-patchup.
Nonsensel
You know what she did?
She's put a tracker in my phone.
- What?l
She knows we're at the golf
link right now. - Really?
That is some psycho nonsensel
Why're you not breaking
up with her cleanly?
It's not that difficult.
- It is difficult.
That's why half
the world's like this.
Nonsense manl Not againl
I'm telling you
these clubs are screwed.
Yes, Monlu.
It's all the club's fault.
Yudi cutie piel
Heyl
I ordered your favorite cheesecake.
- Oohl Cheesecake.
Caramel.
So.
So.
Vishakha.
I've been thinking for a while-
Taste this.
How is it?
- Very nice.
Yummy, right?
- So I've been thinking for a while
...we've known each other six months.
- 11l
What?
- We met at Aarti and Adam's wedding.
Ohl You're calculating from then?
- Of coursel Because-
Two weeks later, at Nancy's party,
you kissed me.
Reay?
- Yeah.
I don't think so.
- Yeah.
I musfve kissed you on your cheeks.
- No, no, no, it was a proper kiss.
Let me show you.
- Nol
Okayl I'm sorry,
just get carried away.
Anyway, what I meant to say is
The two of us
The way we..
You like travelling.
- Yes.
I hate travelling.
- Ohl
You like cheesecake, and
you think I love cheesecake
But I hate it.
- Shall I order chocolate then?
It doesn't matter what cake it is.
What I mean is we're different.
You mean..we're opposites?
- Yes, we're opposites.
People say opposites attractl
That happens with magnets,
not with humans.
With humans, opposites attack.
Like India-Pakistan.
- But India-Pakistan are the same.
They both want Kashmir.
Yeah, you know, opposites do attract.
Like that song.
We come together 'coz opposites
attract. Who'd have thought, aahl
I love the 80's.
Okay.
Okay. Let me start over.
We met 11 months ago,
and I kissed you at Nancy's home.
Not cheek-to-cheek, but lip-to-lip.
We're opposites, and
people think opposites attract.
You want me so much there's
not one tooth in my mouth you..
...haven't left alone.
Still, I think we both-
What?
Why're you giving me your phone?
Have I shown you this before?
You know I'm trying to explain
something to you. - Take a look, baby.
Who's the naked ass?
The naked ass is me?l
How? When?
- You're such a cutiel
How did you do this?
- You looked so cute that day..
I'm really sorry,
I couldn't help myself.
Okay Vishakha, you have to delete that.
- No.
If it leaks somehow,
I'll be embarrassed as hell.
Aww.. you're shy.
- Nol
But if this comes out,
I'll be a joke.
I'm a celebrity.
- Chill, baby.
I'm hardly going to
put it up on Facebook.
Vishakha, please. Come on.
Alright. Alright. We'll delele il.
What if my baby's video goes viral?
Please delete it.
I'll watch it at home.
I have a copy on my laptop.
You okay, baby?
You (gibberish) athome?
- Huh?
You have it at home?
Yes. I got everything
backed up.
If you wanted to prance
in the shower,
...you could've at least
locked the door from inside.
Montu, you're stuck
on the wrong detail.
I mean, when I shower,
I always lock the door from inside.
And from the outside, when
Gauri's in the shower.
Montul Focus.
Get me out of this mess.
Walk with me.
You deleted the
video on her phone.
She has a copy of it on her laptop.
And the laptop's at her home. Right.
So, here's the plan.
We'll sneak into her house
and delete that
file from her laptop.
She's leavingl She's leavingl
Where did you call her?
- Arclight Theatre.
So, we have an hour.
Step 1. Successful.
If we get caught,
we'll be thrown in jail.
That may be your hangout spot,
it's not mine.
Every newspaper will carry my photos
...on the front page
And you know how..
...nasty the media can be to
us celebrities if we make a mistake.
Hey, Yudi. Can I tell you something?
You're not as famous
as you think you are.
I mean, this whole office?
No one's read your book.
Hey, Rachaell
Hi. Have you read Operation Payback?
No.
Hey, Rico.
Did you read Operation Payback?
Okay, okay, okay, let's go.
Did you delete that tracker
app on your phone? - Yesl
Step 2. Find the key.
Step 3. Open the door.
Okay Montu, I just realized.
This is a very bad idea.
Shut it, you coward.
I told you. Trust me.
The whole world will talk
about our robbery story forever.
Maybe this is the excitement
I need in my life.
Maybe even spice up my marriage.
Yudi, I need this.
Help me, please.
I thought I asked you for help.
Come onl
I've never been inside a
single woman's place before.
Because you got married
when you were a kid.
So many pillows?l
Why do girls need so many pillows?
Montu, don't touch anythingl
Girls have a strong sixth
sense about these things.
Nol It's asking for a password.
What's her favorite film?
- Love, Actually.
You're her boyfriend,
think of another option.
I Love Yudil
- You egomaniacl
Aah..l
Yudi, look what I foundl
Pink Panther.
What are you doing?
She's my girlfriend.
Whose girlfriend?
You just broke up with her.
Until we don't breakup-breakup,
she's my girlfriend
...and your sister-in-law.
Do I ever have wrong
intentions about Gauri?
As if I get wrong
intentions about Gauril
Why can't Gauri wear
something like this?
I'm sick of those
white and grey vestsl
Montul
She forgot the tickets.
Let me see. Please...
Let me see. Please...
Let's gol This was a terrible plan.
- Stop.
We'll do what we came hereto do.
Are you crazy? What are you doing?
Operation Payback.
Come on. Come on.
Nonsensel It's lockedl
We'll have to jump again.
Watch carefully and repeat.
- No chance.
You jump and
open the door for me.
I don't want the father
of my kid to be a cripple.
Cowardassl
Hi, Aanchal?
- Yudi.
What? Who's this?
Armaan..Ji. Superstar?
Don't you recognize the voice?
Oh...hi, Mr Armaanji.
Armaanji. What's up?
- What what's up?
You called. You tell me what's up.
No, nothing. Nothing.
I just called lo tell you your
scripfs coming along very well.
Totally kickassl
Good, goodl The songs are
superhit already. - Songs?
You can't make a
remedy without songs.
Make sure the song situations
are believable.
No forced songs, understood?
- Yes, of course.
There are two kinds
of superhit songs.
Either you shake it up
at the disco..or in bedl
Wowl This knowledge
has to comes from experience.
And hey,
add a few kissing scenes as well.
The young man should love it.
- The milkman?
Yes, Sir.
I can see why that's important.
The youth, not the milkman.
- Ohl Youthl
lam making a movie, I'm not making tea.
- Yes sir. Absolutely.
Listen, I am at the gym right now.
Tightening up my body.
Call me later.
Listen, we've recorded
a song for our film.
It's a funky song.
I am throwing a party
on Saturday. Do come.
Yes, ofcourse.
This is the basic price list.
Sir, it's $10,000 for six-pack abs.
$10,000 for a new nose.
And $10,000 for the face.
Tell him to do it for $15,000.
When I take off my
shirt in the movie..
The whole industry
will line up here.
He's just struck gold with me.
- Sir.
Hello.
- Hey, Aanchal.
Hey, Aanchall
- Who is this?
This is Yudi.
- Yudi who?
Yudil
Yudi? We met the other day.
I write books.
Well...book.
- Right. Right. Right.
Senior writer,
friend, philosopher, guide. - Stud.
Of course.
- Gary gave me your number.
Just to check up on you.
- Gary?
Yeah.
Hi. Did you give Yudi my number?
- Yudi?
No.
That was so thoughtful of him.
And so nice of you.
I was wondering if you're
getting bored in LA..
Who has the time to get bored,
with all the meetings and readings?
- Yes.
That's true.
What do you do at night?
- What?
I meant, in the evenings,
after your meetings.
If you want to see LA,
maybe I can show you around.
I've been seeing
only LA all these days?
How about we do
something this weekend?
You want to take me out on a date?
- No, no.
What I mean is coffee or something?
Just like that Over the weekend.
Just like that.
I'm sorry, I have
an important meeting on Saturday.
Well, okay.
If something gets cancelled,
call me.
Yeah, of course. Take care. Bye.
Loserl
Don't you have anything to do?
- You don't either.
If you can't scoop
butter with your finger
overturn the can.
- Means?
Gar!!-
No, sorryl
I can't cancel Aanchal's
Meeting on Saturday.
Oh really, then you won't
get your script either. - What?
Aanchal's really busy,
she's working hard.
Don't turn her into a Yudi.
How dare you turn me into a saying?
Don't Yudi your life
That's a Yudi move?
Does your Mom know about
your happy ending massages
with that Roberto?
Why you trying to screw me over?
Stop effing with mel
Then cancel the meeting.
- No, Yudi. I wish I could.
But I can'tl
Cancelled it.
Actually, you know what? For you, donel
- Good.
But you'll have to
hand over my script real soon.
I'll think about it.
It's Aanchal.
Hello? Who's this?
- Aanchal.
Aanchal who?
Whom you wanted to
take out on a date 5 minutes ago?
Oh, heyl Hi.
Sorry, I answered
my phone without looking.
$0..
- Right. Okay.
Anyway, Gary just told me my
Saturday's meeting's been cancelled.
$0..
- So?
So if you're busy it's okay,
I'll call you later, byel
No, no, wait, wait, waitl
Saturday, 9 pm?
Okay.
- Greatl Bye.
Idiot.
- It happensl
Are you sure, it's okay?
- It will be fun, don't worry.
Hop so?
Hi Arman sir.
- Hi.
Hello.
- She is your girlfriend.
My friend Achal.
Okay bye, sir.
Let's go.
Nonsensel
Yudi? Vishakha.
Hi, Vishakha.
- How dare you?
Oh, so you know.
- So it is truel
How could you do this to me?
Vishakha, l..
This was all Montu's idea.
- Don't bring me into it.
What?
- Yes. About sneaking into your house.
Oh my God.
- Your computer? He smashed it.
Oh my Godl
So it was you the other day?
You didn't know?
So what were you mad about?
No wonder
I smell you all over the housel
And I thought I was missing you.
I'm so stupidl
You know what,
I deserve better than this.
I am sorry, Vishakha, l..
Actually, you know what?
You're absolutely right.
You do deserve better.
You should spend your
life with a better man.
I'm not good enough for you.
Are you trying to get rid of me?
- What?
Nol Nol at all.
- For that girl?
What? Which girl? - I know
all about you and that 'writer'.
Ohl
- Oh?
Is that all you have
to say for yourself?
You're cheating on me, Yudi.
You broke my heart.
No, Vishakha, there's nothing
between us. - Don't lie to mel
You're having an affair
with that pseudo, intellectual..
Matching-matching,
rice-plate Reddy, aren't you?
No.. We're just friends.
Nothing's happened
- no kiss-wiss, sex-wax
And anyway
we're not together anymore.
You and I are not
together-together anymore, right?
Are we?
Gimme fivel
- It's not confirmed yet.
It is confirmed.
That's all the confirmation you need.
Beyond this is your judgment.
Come on, gimme fivel
I feel bad for her.
- Gimme fivel
On this sidel
Gimme ten you're free again
- You two are celebrating
You both should be ashamed.
Movel Out of my wayl
Be ashamed.
Now your chapter is over.
My Bab)!-
So I thought, maybe
I could become a writer too.
Wowl
I don't have a cool
back story like you.
It's jusL.
As a kid, I used to watch Dad
He never had time for anyone.
Not even himself.
He was successful, but,
You know,
...l wanted to taste life,
you know what I mean?
I tried starting my own rock band.
But that was hard work too.
That's when I realized I
should be a writer.
How's your life of leisure
working out for you these days?
I'm brokel
I have to work now. No choice.
Trouble is, I can't write.
- You've forgotten how to work?
It's writer's blockl - More like
a mental block, don't you think?
Can I ask you something?
How do you write these love stories?
You don't even believe in them.
- How do you know?
Maybe deep inside, I'm romantic?l
So Yudi's life is just like
a romantic comedy now.
Soo sweetl
Correct. In this big wide world,
we bumped into each otherl
You didn't bump into her,
you stalked herl
We're a nice combination.
She's hot. I'm cool.
She's romantic on the inside,
I'm romantic on the outside.
She's young, l'"1 Y'-"\9-
Shut up, I'm not old.
Okay, young at heart!
Anyway, everything's perfect.
- Actually
This is going too smooth.
Something's going to give somewhere.
- Shut upl
What?
- She could be engaged. Married.
Pregnant.
And if it's a serious film,
she could be terminally ill. - Whal?l
That doesn't always happen.
It does. Almost all the time.
It's a requirement.
Hey, what's up?
- Nothingl
Just thought I'd say hi.
- Okay? Hi, Yudi.
Are you married?
What?
No. I knew it.
Did you call me to ask that?
- No. I just called.
And, you aren't engaged, are you?
Have you seen a ring on my finger?
- No.
You could've hidden it also, like Montu.
- Who's Montu?
What are you blabbering about?
You don't have a boyfriend, do you?
- No, Yudi. I don't have any boyfriend.
I knew ill
Any critical
Uh, you're healthy overall, right?
- What thel
Good, good. Done.
Any more questions?
What?
Okay call you later byel
Well? - You didn't
ask all the questions.
Will you accept her if
she's carrying someone else's sin
...in her stomach?
Shut upl
- Just asking.
So,
situation normal.
- Impossible.
Every story has something
happening right about at this point.
When?
- Now.
Now?
- Almost.
Now?
What happened to you?
This.. was.. a small accident.
Wasn't an accident. It's an allergy.
All this stuff around my face?
These foreigners overdo things.
Give me a few days. I'll be fine.
What do you got?
Write something?
No, l'll.. finish it soon.
I have a new idea.
What's this?
- It's all his genius.
Thing about me is,
...l'm a method actor.
I've done my homework.
I've marked the
best scenes in these films.
Use the ones you think
are right for the script.
This way, no one will ever
be able to tell..
...which film we copied it from.
You mean you watched
all these films
and marked every scene you liked?
- He saw them.
I understood them.
So. Knock yourself out
inserting these scenes.
Armaanji, I think we should
try something different.
What is different?
No matter how different
you try to be..
People watch what they like.
Okay, just give me one week.
I promise you,
your mind will be blown.
He doesn't get it.
He doesn't get it.
Look here.
This look? There's 10 pages
of dialogue coming.
Can you hear them?
Hold ill
Wide shotl
Jimmy, jimmy,
jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, closel
Wide againl Cut to song.
That's how you write scripts.
Sir?
- Not yet.
There was a time when..
...whatever I said
was the script.
If I didn't? Pause.
If I was having an
affair with the heroine?
Pregnant pausel
Screw it. Do your thing.
I don't like interfering anyway.
I'm just sharing these ideas so..
...you don't write a boring script.
- No, no.
It is a romcom.
Remedy.
But it should be a bit hard hitting.
Intense.
Life is hard hitting and intense too.
Do all of that
on your own time.
Sir, I just don't want
the script to be cheesy.
Cheesy?
Understand this truth.
In this world, every boy is na'l've..
...every girl is insecure,
and we're all cheesy in real life.
People go to the theatres
...with their family and a tub
of popcorn. Don't waste their money.
Everything should be spectacular.
And happy.
Let the hero and heroine run
into each others arms.
Let there be slow-motions.
Let there be sunset.
If it rains, let it.
If it songs play, let them.
Why, if they want to kiss, let theml
These days,
the Censors aren't an issue.
People should be happy.
Don't get stuck in your creativity.
Don't give life lessons
for 300 rupees.
There's no more, Sir.
Let's write quietly for one hour.
You write yours, I'll write mine.
I don't have anything like this.
Can I borrow your dolly?
Absolutely not.
That's my lucky charm.
Don't touch it.
Fine.
Can you type a little slower?
You're giving me a complex.
Focus.
I can't do this.
Tryl It hasn't even been 5 minutes.
I need inspiration.
Isn't this enough?
I have an idea.
What is it?
You're off to 'Frisco tomorrow,
right? - Yeah?
Let's drive there.
- Why?
Because you haven't seen
the Pacific Coast Highway.
And maybe I'll find my
inspiration driving.
But my flight and hotel have
been booked. - So?
Get them cancelled.
Think about it.
The coast on one side.
Open skies on the other.
And me, in the middle of it alll
No. I have a reading
day after morning.
I'm not taking any risk.
Baby, I am risk-free.
I come with a guarantee.
Are you sure this is a good idea?
- Absolutely.
We'll head out in the morning,
reach by sundown,
and you can make it for your
reading the next morning.
Come on.
Fine.
- Done.
But we'll start early.
- Absolutely.
Early morning.
Finallyl
You call this early morning?
It's not morning yet.
You've calling me like
a psycho from 6 aml
You said we'd leave early morning.
Early is 11 or 12,
after a nice long breakfast.
What's with all this luggage?
Planning to settle down there?
What? This is just basic stuff.
You should've brought
some porters along.
Don't be such a big baby.
Reay?
Your Highnessl
- Thank you.
Thank you.
Wowl
This is so beautiful!
If this doesn't inspire you..
...you should just quit writing.
You're welcome.
And you wanted to fly alone.
All we need is some background
music to go with this scene.
Sure.
Oh man.
What?
No, this is not nice.
No way
"It's not the flu or feveru"
"He-s justu"
"Down with love."
"Down with love."
"The black eyes."
"The fair cheeks."
"The sultry gaze."
"The enticing gait."
"Why did you break my heart."
"Why did we fall in love."
"Why did you go away.."
"Away...Away.."
"Comeu"
"Shower me with your love.."
Give it to mel
- Stop it Yudi.
"What's behind the veil."
"Behind the veil.."
"What's behind the veil."
"Behind the veil.."
"My heart's behind my veil.."
"Every time I see a girl,
my crazy heart goesu"
"Ole...Ole...Ole.."
"l sway,
dance and sing the song of love."
"Ole...Ole...Ole.."
Aahl Nonsensel
Nonsensel
You Idiot.
Are you okay?
- What happened?
I feel asleep.
- You fell asleep at the wheel?
Hold you, please don't sleep.
- So it's my fault?
Of course.
First, you wake me up
at 6 like some school teacher.
And then happily dazed off.
Nonsensel It's not starting.
Engine must be flooded.
What now?
I'll call AAA.
They'll gel us out of here quickly.
Oh God, we'll be very late.
- No, we won't.
I'll get you there by tonight,
I promise.
Y!
Y!
No, I'm not asking why.
Iam saying Y. My name is Yudi.
Y for Yahoo.
U for Underwear.
U for Unicorn.
What did they say?
It'll lake at least 4 hours.
4 hours?
I can't believe I
made such a huge mistake.
This was such a bad idea.
As long as you had the wind
on your face, everything was fine.
At the first sign of trouble,
it became a bad idea?
I cancelled my nice,
comfortable flightl
If the pilot had fallen asleep
...you wouldn't even get
a chance to argue like thisl
Yudi, you do realize we could've diedl
- Don't be so dramatic.
Whoa, I'm being dramatic nowl
- Of coursel
We should get a lift.
I can't believe thisl
No one wants to helpl
Wait.
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
Take off your shirt.
What?l
Your face can't be seen
in the distance.
You'll need to show your body.
- No way.
Your wish.
Come onl Somebody?
Arch your backl
Stomach in, chest outl
Chest outl
- It is out, Yudi.
You need a sexy pose.
Sexierl
That's good, That's nice.
Nice.
And turn around slowly.
Slowly, slowlyl
Shut up, Yudi.
Okay, it's networking.
Tell you what, take the top off.
What the hell are you doing there?
Get up.
I think you'll do better than me.
Take it off. Why are you covering?
- Are you mad?
Take it off, Yudi. Show your chest.
Stick it out a little bit.
- Yeahl
Nice.
Heyl You need a ride?
No, no. Please go. It's okay.
Thank you.
Idioll
He called you an idiotl
Finallyl
You from India?
Yeah.
Girlfriend?
- Nol We're just friends.
Just friendl
Tell him, Yudi.
I have 'just friend'.
- Yeah?
Shut up, Yudi.
How much longer?
2 minutesl
15 minutes.
20-25 minutesl
Thanks.
So sweet
- The perfect Facebook moment.
Yay, I'm finally marriedl
Hubby and wifey foreverl I love youl
Heart, heart, heart.
At least 15 Comments and 100 Likes.
"What a lovely couple you guys make."
"You guys are perfect
for each other."
What do you think? 3 years?
- Nah. 1 year tops.
First 3 months will be
ruled by hormones.
Next 3 by realization...
and the following
3 by frustration.
By the first anniversary,
they'll be at war.
"Give me my spacel"
"l don't like your motherl"
"What's wrong with my mother?"
"l hate you.
I don't want to talk to you."
"Eff youl" "Eff youl"
Hey, that groom looks..
Just like the hero from
one of your books.
If I ever run into
the hero of my book..
...l'll knock him out.
I don't get it. Every girl talks
about equality and independence.
And yet all of them wanL.
...their prince charming
to swoop in and rescue them.
Complete them.
Change their life.
Doesn't make sense, right?
Then why do you write
those books?
What difference does it make
if I write or not?
Dude, you're a bit offl
What?
You and me, we won't last 6 months.
- 6 months?
We can't last 6 hours.
An whole lifetime
is out of the question.
Perfect.
Cheers to that.
What? Why didn't you
book a room for yourself?
I didn't
Where did you plan on sleeping?
- I don't know.
I don't think that far ahead.
- Yudil
I thought you were on top
of the arrangements.
I handled the travel.
Are you really sure you
don't have any extra rooms?
Sorry, ma'am. We're fully booked.
This has to happen.
Enjoy your stay-
I can't believe I'm forced
to share a room with you.
Come on, we're adults. We'll manage.
I'm an adult,
I can't say the same about you.
So listen. I'll lake the bed
and you take the couch.
You know, I have a bad back.
I can't sleep on the couch.
So I should sleep on the couch?
- No.
You don't have to.
It's a big bed.
We both can fit in here comfortably.
Without even touching each other.
I promise.
No.
This is ridiculous.
I always sleep on the left side.
You're on the left,
just in the other direction.
Hang on a second. This is my room.
Why should I sleep on this side?
- Don't be selfish.
Switch!
Reay?
- Yeahl
Roll over the blanket, Yudi.
Can you keep your
feet away from my face?
You too.
Your feet stink.
- Not more than your face.
Can you..
Aanchal.
Aanchal.
Aanchal.
Aanchal.
Okay, I'm going to
lift your arm in the air.
If you're asleep,
your arm will slay up.
Else it will fall down.
How old are you, Yudi?
Oh, so you're awake.
What do you want?
- Nothing.
I just wanted to apologize.
You met with an
accident because of me.
So I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have
fallen asleep either.
Sorry, I got carried away
and said too much. - No.
It was my idea to drive here.
All I had to do was drop
you here safe and sound.
Driving here wasn't
a bad idea at all.
I really enjoyed it.
Lovely weather, right?
The room's nice too.
So is the bed. So soft.
Should we do something?
Make out?
What? I can't hear you?
I think we should make out.
- I can't hear you, Yudi.
Let's kissl
You didn't have to kick me.
A polite no would've done fine.
Uhh, okay.
Hmm?
Okay.
What okay?
You won't fall in love, right?
I don't fall in love.
Good. - And normally,
I usually say this to girls.
And I can never be so direct.
All I am saying is
...l go back next week
I don't want things between us
So let's not complicate things.
- Nol
Let's just be in the moment.
- Yeahl
You understand, right?
No falling in love.
Just control yourself.
I'm very addictive.
What?
- Should we put on some music?
I'm sorry.
- You have a big nose.
You moved your heacL.
Okay.
Anyway, let's try this again.
Should we increase the volume?
Are you going to talk nonstop?
Nol
Nothing's changed, right?
Not at all.
In fact, you seem more irritating.
Can we sleep properly now?
What, you mean upside down?
My face hurts.
I don't know how many times
you kicked me in your sleep.
Next time sleep on the couch.
Tell me. One second, almost ready.
How do I look?
Like you worked really hard all night.
- Shut upl
Relax. It will be fine.
"To gain something,
you have to lose something."
"Rena knew it boiled
down to just three words."
"But did she have the courage
to finally say them aloud.."
"..to the person who stood
for everything she despised?"
"ln that heartbeat,
she found the courage."
"So her thoughts were exactly this.."
"Love me and free my soul."
"l love you and adore you..."
"...and I don't know
any other way of living."
"Of lovingl"
And I counted 1 yawns,
3 snores and 1 dead person.
A very senior writer,
friend and philosopher
...once said to me,
"People come to book reading.."
"..to know more about the author."
So I'm thinking let's
you and me have a conversation.
Let's just talk. What do you say?
I have a question for you?
- Yes, sure.
How close to your personal
life is your writing?
Have you ever been in love?
Umm. Let's see. Class
3, Class 1, 12, college..
Three years ago. Kiran,
Vikram, Hussain, Kkrish and Andy.
Yes, I have a question.
- Yes.
Why do you write such conventional
and idealistic love stories?
Because, our lives are so crowded
and often, love between
two people gets lost in it.
So I thought there's
one way to save love.
Write it down in the
pages of a book and sell it.
What I am trying to say is that love
nowadays is just a four-letter word
Thank youl
"The heart sometimesmconfuses me.."
"And...l'll be really grateful if..."
"Understand what's
it sayingmand tell men"
"And...l'll be really grateful..."
"l'll be really gratefulu"
"lf you just let
your heart expressu"
"uwhat you could never say."
"Just like I am for
you... You're for me."
"Just like I am for
you... You're for me."
"lf we keep meetingmlike thisu"
"Love might just seek us out."
"The heart's deceptive..."
"Why did it skip a
beatmhearing about it?"
"It's no longer in my control."
"Since the heart's stuck on you."
Let's take a picture?
- Of course.
Patel Value.
"Just like I am for you...
You're for me."
"Just like I am for you...
You're for me."
Yeah, babyl
Yudil
"l'll be really gratefulu"
"First I request... then miss you.."
"l think only about you."
"l don't love you.."
"..still I always
want you around me."
"It's nothing...
yet, there's something."
"Since we met, the heart feels..."
"Just like I am for you...
You're for me."
"Just like I am for you...
You're for me."
"YOI-Fre for mg "
"YOI-Fre for mg "
"l'll be really gratefulu"
So, everything fine or not?
- Yes and no.
Why does this always happen with you?
First, you were confused
about Vishakha. Now it's Aanchal.
Shut up, Montu.
There's no confusion this time.
I suggest you do a full
background check on her.
If she falls in love with you..
...Il will just spell trouble.
- No chance.
She's just like me.
- Like you?
Wowl Then this will be the
best relationship of your life.
Yeahl
If she's so smart, why is
she giving you so much attention?
Let me tell you something.
Girls love projects.
And what better project than me?
That's true.
That's very true.
Aanchal.
Hey, what's happening?
Nothing, I'm free.
- Heyl You're not free, okay?
Do what?
- Have a drink with me.
Done.
We'll meet at 9.
Yudi, don't go
- Bye.
Don't go, Yudil Yudi, what the helll
You know how tough it's been
to get permission to go out
I won't be able to do this
after I become a father.
Please let me go.
Aanchal's leaving tomorrow.
It's her farewell dinner.
Tomorrow on, we're together.
- Fine, go.
I know you don't love me.
- Semi
Vicky, could you keep an
eye on my friend, please?
He's very depressed.
Sweetheart, why so sad?
- Married, thank you.
Almost done.
Just two more minutes.
One more minute.
Yeah. So what were you saying?
So. Suddenly,
in the middle of the jungle
Oh manl
Sorryl
And I left poor Montu alone for this?
Flight details
Almost done.
Done.
So, tell me.
- Forget it.
Oh come on, tell me.
I'm listening. Reallyl
Okay, so suddenly,
in the middle of the jungle,
...a tiger? Or a bear?
Dinosaur?
Okay, let's say it was an elephant.
Suddenly he saw that an ele...
Yudi, my phonel
Yudi..
Yudi, I need the
I'm sorry.
Sorryl
Nol Nol
Did this belong to
one of your ex-girlfriends?
But she's not here.
You can wear them.
No, I don't want them.
Fine, you come out as you are.
I love a naked girl in my bedroom.
What's all this?
Don't touch anything, pleasel
Wowl You wrote these?
Yes. Once upon a time,
I used to be a writer.
Why haven't you completed any of it?
- Couldn't find happy endings.
Not every story needs a happy ending.
Not bad.
You do work hard.
It's bad for my image.
Keep them back, please.
- Fine.
And please don't tell anyone.
Can you play,
or is it just to strike a pose?
Of course. I'm not a total fake.
Really? I wonder.
Actually,
I always wanted to be a rockslar.
Yeah, I've heard that story.
So sing something.
- Now?
No. I feel shy.
Why? Don't know how?
I'm a legend.
The world just never got it.
Reay?
Ready?
Wowl
- I wrote that song in..
Okay, it's Led Zeppelin.
Yeah. But seriously. Anything.
"L was 16...and she was beautifulu"
And I bought this
guitar to impress her.
Very impressed.
- Thank you.
So...was she impressed?
- No.
And I bought this
guitar for no reason.
Funny.
Okay, seriously.
- Seriously.
I don't remember it, but
- BuL.
What are the words?
"It was in one of the drawers."
"It was right here...
but now it's lost."
"It shouldn't have happened."
"My heart's gone missing."
"My senses were a bit dusty."
"That was my only fault."
"Let it bemwhafs gone, is gone."
"It was useless anyway."
"Welcomemmy beloved."
"My heart...
- It's your punishment."
Are you sure you can't stay for few
more days? - I wish I couldl
"Welcomemmy beloved."
"Welcomemmy beloved."
"Welcomemmy beloved."
"Welcomemmy beloved."
AanchaL.
Yeah?
You know?
Yeah?
When are you back?
I don't know.
I have no plans.
Do you have any plans of coming
to India? - Not right now.
But I will, one day.
Okay.
Thanks, for everything.
I had fun.
So I'll see you tomorrow
before I leave, right?
I have to meet Armaam.
Deadlines
You know how it is.
- I know. No problem.
I'll try.
- It's okay.
So bye, I guess?
Bye.
That turned out such an anti-climax.
- It's correct.
We decided not to
complicate the situation.
But you want her to come back.
Why haven't you answered your phone?
Sorry, must be somewhere inside.
What are you doing here?
Where's your husband?
- I left himl
What? For me?
- Shut upl
I'm not leaving until he comes here
and apologizes lo me.
That could take weeksl
- So is that a problem?
That's fine. That's fine.
I'll take your bed,
you take the couch, okay?
Actually, I have a backache. That
bed is specifically designed for me.
Yudi, I've only heard this crap
a few million limes.
Besides, you could sleep on the
floor, it's really good for the back.
So basically, the first time
I feel something for a girl..
And she's leaving.
- Oh my Godl
You're in love with her.
- I don't know if it's love.
That's your problem.
You never accept your feelings.
If you go on like this
...you'll slay alone all your life.
Anyway, can I ask you something?
Can you live without her?
- Of course.
I can live without anyone.
I don't need anybody.
Let me put it in a different way.
Will you miss her if she leaves?
Maybe.
- That's it. It's love.
This is love?
Well, not for the rest of the world.
But for your standards,
this is enough.
Since it's established you're
in love-ish with her.. - But we..
Shhl I think now that it's clear.
You should go tell her.
Seriously, Yudi.
Slop living your life like a comedy.
Live it like a love story.
Kickass line.
I should write that down.
My kick and you're fooll
You're in lovel
Mommy.
- Oh, honey.
Come here.
Come here, honey.
You okay?
Look who's here?
Daddy's herel
Okay, come on,
let's give you your bag.
Come on, honey.
Come onl
- Daddyl
Daddyl
Take care, okay?
Listen, Divya.
I know I hurt you bad.
I never said this properly.
But I'm really sorry.
Can you say that again, please?
I really am sorry.
Its okay, I wasn't any less, either.
You know?
Anyway, come here.
- I'll get crushed.
Come on. Give me a hug.
You take care of yourself, okay?
- You too.
She's leaving.
Aanchal.
- I know.
You think I should
- Yes, I think you should.
The Airport Climax never fails.
What rubbishl
- That's how the world works.
Don't try to change the rules.
Look, no one knows why..
But, the Airport
Climax Scene always works.
But they won't let me inside.
Buy a cheap ticket to somewhere.
I could always call and stop her.
- That'll just kill the effect.
Nonsensel
Sir.
- Be back in a minute, buddy.
Look at that guy.
Driving like an maniac.
And people blame us taxi drivers.
As if the road is
his father's property.
Heyl
Stop the cabl
- Stupid lndianl
Stop the cabl
I'll show you who's
the real Michael Schumacherl
Aanchall
Aanchall
You?
- Tell him to stop.
What are you doing here?l
- Tell that moron to stopl
Careful, you might hurt someone.
- No, madam.
We will win this race.
What is he doing?
- I know him. Stopl
Stopl
- You know this fool?
Yesl Please stop the car.
You could've said this before.
What are you doing here?
I've got something to tell you.
Please don't.
You don't even know what I'm going
to say. - I don't want to know.
You won't even give me a chance?
Don't ruin it, Yudi.
Reay?
- It's easier said than done.
And we don't believe
in all this, right.
No falling in love, remember?
But I can change.
Maybe
I'm not just talking about you.
Iam not ready for this, Yudi.
And I know you aren't either.
Trust me on this.
You'll thank me for this later.
We'll still be friends.
"Boasts all the time."
"But turns out to be a dud."
"Bad luck sent a gift."
"But he was really happy to see it."
"Even after hearing
his doom calling.."
"...stupid fool asks what is that?"
"Bro...you're such a pussycat."
"A big oaf and spoil brat."
"You've no reason to chat."
"Bro...you're such a pussymcat."
What are you doing, Yudi?
What's wrong with you?
That's enough.
Thank you for getting me here, Yudi.
I'm so happy you're
back in your senses.
Your depression made my life boring.
But yeah, how long will
I cry over one girl?
Did I give her a dollar less?
Let's do something wild.
Don't answerl
Ohl
Oh, so what's wrong with him?
- Unfortunately
he's had an anxiety attack.
- Oh my Godl
Hey, Yudi.
- Hi.
What happened?
I'm pregnant.
Shootl
I'm so sorry.
He's dying, isn't he?
He's dying, right?
If anything happens to him,
I'll be all alone.
No, Montu, he isn't dying.
Then what happened?
I'm pregnant with your child.
Oops baby? How?
What do you mean by how?
What's going on? Why are all the women
getting pregnant at the same time?
Is this some kind of flu?
Shut up, Montu. Please.
Now we're really brothers.
My wife and your
Vishakha, are both pregnant.
Didn't I always tell you, Yudi?
No matter how many
girls you fool around with..
...you'll end up marrying her.
Relax, relax, I'm just joking.
Relax.
I love you, Yudi.
You're my best friend.
Please don't diel
- Don't worry.
You aren't wearing anything below?
- No.
So what are you going to do?
Vishakha's pregnant,
I can't abandon her now.
I have to do the right thing.
Let's try to get a hold of your life.
You're going to marry
the girl you don't love..
Because
she's pregnant with your child.
The girl you loved is
now the mother of three kids
and stays at your place
with her kids whenever she wants.
And the girl you love now..
Is treating you the exact same way you
treated all your girlfriends so far.
Karma is being bitchy.
So what's your point?
There's no point.
You're just screwed, that's all.
Idioll
"They say love dwells in every heart."
"Someone just needs to find it."
"You never know when
one falls in love."
"When the eyesmmeet."
"The distance made me realizeu"
"..how close you're to me."
Surprisel
Happy birthdayl Yudi cutiepiel
I got him goodl
Everybody's here.
Thanks.
"Happy birthday to youl"
She's nice.
Okay.
HI.
Montu.
I'm sure Yudi's told you about me.
- Not really.
Ohl
Yudi and I have been
BFFs for 15 years.
Best Friends Forever.
Ohl
I was Yudi's GF.
I'm F now, and will soon be W.
We're very close.
I mean close friends.
Iam pregnant with his child.
HGY-
. H9Y-
Yudi pudie pie.
I love you.
You've never once
said "l love you" to me.
You know what?
I don't want to marry you.
Come on, Vishakha.
- No.
If you're marrying me out of pity,
I don't want any of it.
It's not pity, this is our kid.
- Yudi..
I'm not pregnant.
I'm sorry? Whafil
I lied to you.
What?l
- I know.
I'm having a panic attack again.
But why? Why? - Because
I thought it was the only way.
You'd have never said yes otherwise.
But such a big lie?
Have you lost your mind?
Vishakha, that's just mean.
You're crazyl
You have a right to be angry.
Say what you need to say.
I could've got a heart attack.
I could've diedl
Don't worry. You won't die so easily.
You love yourself too much.
I'll just mail it to you.
- Don't worry about it.
You should go to her.
- And do what?
Tell her that you love her.
I've said it once already.
You want me say it again?
You'll have to say it from the heart.
And prove you really love her.
Prove to whom?
Them.
Who?
- Them. Them.
What?
Prove to the whole world,
the universe
...that you've changed,
and that you love this girl.
But before that, you have
to really change from the inside.
How much more do I have to change?
Change can't be measured.
It can only be felt.
In movies, this is so easy
Music does half the work..
And everything's fine
in a minute or two.
But there's no option
for poetry in life.
The last few years,
I started many books..
...never finished even one.
I was afraid that
Ending should not be bad.
See. I don't like endings.
If I don't write ending
then atleast hope remains.
This time, I'll have to
commit to one story honestly.
S0 what if I fail?
At least I won't be scared anymore.
Oh no. No. No.
You actually wrote the script.
I thought I'd have to
return their advance.
I even got my cheque book.
Remember, don't stare.
Come.
I said, don't stare.
Hello.
What's this?
The script.
Come narrate it to me.
On the beach.
He is convinced he's
unable to finish the book..
Because he can never start it.
Suddenly
Suddenly, he realizes that
silence is the best poem.
And he wrote it down
Cut to widel
A red convertible
enters in slow motion.
And them.
Jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy,
jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, jimmy, closel
He wears his sunglasses,
lights up his cigarette,
A superhit song starts,
That's the hero's reentry.
In high speed, another red
convertible screeches to a halt.
There's this stunning
beauty sitting inside.
Cut to your close. Cut to her close.
Cut to your close. Cut to her close.
He's playing a song for
her on the guitar. Soft musicl
And it strikes a chord
in the girl's heart.
She turns around,
and it starts to rain.
He's wandering around like a madman,
missing her.
Rain continues.
He looks towards the sea and smiles.
Methinks, one day
One day.
Then?
What then?
That's all I wrote.
- What?
Where's the ending?
I haven't found the ending.
I'm going in search of it.
"L found it...
- But I didn't know it."
"Since I knew you..
- I forgot everything else."
"l found it...
- But I didn't know it."
"Since I knew you..
- I forgot everything else."
What do you want?
- Aanchal.
Ma'am. Someone hereto see you.
So, what are you doing here?
Well, I was in the neighborhood.
So I thought I'd just say hi.
Okay.
Hello.
HI.
Are you done with your script?
- Well, almost.
I couldn't find the ending.
That's why I'm here.
- Oh.
I thought you came hereto see me.
I have a few notes.
- Of the climax?
For you.
Me?
You said don't ruin
things by saying it.
So I wrote it down.
I'm a writer, after all.
I need to read what I've written,
...to really understand.
Read it.
"If you want to learn how to swim,
you have to jump into the water."
"How long will I
to sit in my boat scared of.."
Okay, that's rubbish.
It was just warm-up.
It's nonsense.
Read the next one.
They say opposites attract.
It's a lie.
Everywhere, we look
for a reflection of us.
If you ever do find one,
treasure it, keep it safe.
Oh nonsensel
The best line just flew away.
- Sorry.
You know, Aanchal.
I'm not asking you to spend
the rest of your life with me.
Who wants a lifelong commitment?
Let's take a day at a time.
We won't think about the
future or look at the past.
We'll just take care of the present.
And before you know it, we'd
have spent the rest of our lives
AanchaL.
I love
You okay?
Yeah.
Good.
So, I said I love you.
Do you have something to say?
Thanks.
Thanks? Are you serious?
What? - I mean, it was hard
for me to say that l..
"They say love dwells
in every heart."
"Someone just needs to find it."
By the way you didn't
answer my question.
You said lets take a day at a time.
So only today.
We can think about tomorrow later.
Oh really?
Every story can have a happy ending.
If you end it at the right time.
For now, this is The End to my story.
"L found it...
I came all the way
from America just for you.
Even forever seemed like
an hour waiting for you.
Now, no one can separate us.
I love you, baby doll.
Aaand CUTI
Mind-blowing, Armaanji. Superbl
Did you understand what I said?
- Not really.
Come to the van, I'll explain it to you.
Thanks.
They should have casted Aliya.
By paying ten million rupees or so more.
She's a bit old.
Excuse me,
Sir, I didn't write that dialogue.
What is he saying?
First time, right?
- BuL.
It's okay.
Superb, Sir. Superb.
- Thanks.
How was it?
Nice.
How are the dialogues coming?
Kickassl
"Boasts all the time."
"But turns out to be a dud."
"Bad luck sent a gift."
"But he was really happy to see it."
"Even after hearing
his doom calling.."
"...stupid fool asks what is that?"
"Bro...you're such a pussycat."
"A big oaf and spoil brat."
"You've no reason to chat."
"Bro...you're such a pussymcat."
"l wonder what your destiny...
has in store for you."
"Son...you're stuckmin your own trap."
"A little girlmbowled you over."
"And you just held to your bat."
"Bro...you're such a pussycat."
"A big oaf and spoil brat."
"You've no reason to chat."
"Bro...you're such a pussymcat."