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Haunted Castle (2001)
Two days ago, I received a letter
from a lawyer in Europe. It regretted to inform me my mother had died in a helicopter crash. She was returning from her sold out farewell concert in London. Her estate was to be turned over to me, the letter said, but my physical presence was required immediately... Everything had been arranged, a plane ticket to Heathrow, a car waiting... only the timing couldn't have been worse. Last month I released my first album, it got rave reviews in the US and we were just starting our debut American tour. Maybe this sounds a little cold-hearted, but the fact is, she has refused to see me or even speak to me ever since she left home when I was only three. I never knew why... Everything I knew about her came from the tabloids, how she'd become a recluse rock star, hiding out in a castle nobody'd ever heard of. But why did she want to give this.. this place to me? She never returned a single letter I wrote, never helped with the band, even indirectly. And after we worked so hard to finally get our big break now she calls me from the grave... Well, I hope what they say isn't true about curiosity killing the cat Hello? Hello?! Hello, anybody home?! Anybody alive in here? What in the...? Uh... What's goin on here? Okay, this is getting a little weird. Hey... What do you want from me? Whoah, guys. Look, can I help you with something? Fellas? Oooooh... Hey... Watch it!... Listen, I think we have a misunderstanding here. Little help here!! Wooooooo... Little help in here please That felt so good. Huh? What is this? We have an uninvited guest. Let me take care of you, little bird. Now for you, Johnny. Welcome. We've been expecting you... Go upstairs, Johnny. Mr. D is waiting for you!!! Looks like I have no choice. Okay, either I've lost my mind or I'm having really bad jet lag... Now what? Where the heck am I? Wait a minute. I know that voice.. Mother? Johnny, your mother was beautiful when she was young. And she was good, very good, Johnny. You're mother could have been a superstar. She had the talent. But she drove a hard bargain. One of the conditions of her contract was that you were strictly off limits. You were her baby. A rather touching performance really. Anyway I kept my end of the bargain of course. Alas, she could not keep hers. So you've been summoned, and what was once hers I can now offer to you. I know exactly what you're getting at. Really. Enlighten me. I'm having a really weird dream, and I can't wake up. This is better than a dream, Johnny. This is immortality. I can make you the the greatest rock legend of all time. All you have to do is sign on a little dotted line. Now I know who you are. No way! I'm not sign- That's what they all say... at first. You really believe you have talent to make it on your own? That's the dream Johnny. In the real world, you need Mr.D. He can make you everything you ever wanted to be. But we understand if you have some... reservations. Well, perhaps you better look around before you make your final decision. Just to be sure Johnny, You must find your way out. Don't let them get to you. Don't... Who are you? Oh, God! What have I gotten myself into? Interesting place don't you think? Here's the lowdown, Johnny. Centuries ago, music played a relatively minor part in the larger scheme of things within the corporation. It was so difficult to find good recruits, not like politics. We barely met our quotas. Every now and then a client would try to reneg on his deal- Musicians don't read contracts very carefully you know - so we would dig a new cave down here and confine the subject to a life of total anonymity and of course perpetual noise. Drives ya nuts. Long story short, music just wasn't much of a draw. At some point there was even a plan within the corporation to scrap our division altogether. So, fast forward, the Big Idea. It was really my idea but... Not important. At first we wanted to call it Twist and Burn - little too obvious so we settled on Rock and Roll. Business went through the roof. By the time the sixties rolled around our little division was on fuego. Huge growth. Our only problem was space. Let me tell you, when you're dealing with damned souls, storage is always a big problem. So Mr.D. had to come up with a new scheme. This you gotta see. Funny thing about rock stars, the instant they become rich and famous, they tend to think their invincible. Stop living up to their commitments. Even have the audacity to try to break their contracts. But let me tell you, one does not break a deal with Mr.D. But they tried and we build this place all for them. You see we use the deal-breakers to provide entertainment for members of the corporation. Works out rather well. From time to time Mr.D. gathers the troops - a little attitude adjustment party we like to call it - and we have one hell of a good time... Have fun. AHAA... Welcome to our show. If you like the band please applaud as hard as you can. If not... applaud anyway. Turn around Johnny. You must leave this place. I came this far, I might as well see the show. This is not a show you want to see, Johnny. Once they get to you, there is no turning back! Don't do it for me, do it for yourself! But wait, who are you?! Mom? Man, this is getting too weird. Welcome to our show. If you like the band please applaud as hard as you can. If not... applaud anyway. Johnny! What are you doing down here?! I don't know. I just... This place is off-limits. Way off-limits. I HATE this place. Let's get out of here. Opera isn't very popular here, is it? HAAA... you don't know the half of it. Mr. D used to love opera too, hardcore opera fan. Then he got involved with an opera star. Long story, but she left him, broke her deal. Mr. D went totally berserk. Opera is now officially taboo upstairs. Whenever any opera singers break their contract, he gets a little... out of control Never mind. Nothing to do with you, Johnny. Now you must go. Mr. D is getting impatient. The time has come... Good. Come here, Johnny... I want to show you something - your future. You know you have a good voice, but would you like to be a great guitar player as well? I'll make a Rock legend out of you, it would be all yours, everything you ever wanted, let me show you. Yes. Good. Goooood. Good. Johnny? Mom... this one's for you. |
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