- Legs,
- Pudding,
-Legs,
-Pudding,
-Legs! Legs!
-Pudding! Pudding!
-Legs,
-Pudding,
-Legs,
-Pudding,
-Legs,
-Pudding,
Come on, legs are really important,
I'm not saying that legs aren't important,
I'm saying they're not
as important as pudding.
-Okay, you're insane.
-Not really.
Without legs, pants would be like,
"Duh! Now what do we do?"
Objection! Pants can't talk.
-Why are we swinging?
-I don't know!
-Okay, this random debate is over.
-I won.
No, we're gonna let
the iCarly viewers decide who won.
Fine. Everyone at iCarly.com,
look at the homepage
and vote on what you think
is more important,
-Legs...
-...Or pudding.
If you don't vote, you don't care.
Random dancing!
-Okay, later!
-Pudding!
-Legs! Vote now!
-ICarly.com.
-Bye!
-Ciao!
And we're clear.
Good show.
Okay, let's go downstairs
and snack it up.
You coming?
You guys go ahead.
I got some tech stuff to wrap up here.
You wanna play on the swing?
-Will you push me?
-Yes.
Freddie:
In five, four, three, two, ,,
l know, you see
Somehow the world will change for me
And be so wonderful
Live life, breathe air
l know somehow we're gonna get there
And feel so wonderful
lt's all for real
I'm telling you just how l feel
So wake up the members of my nation
lt's your time to be
The brighter side of every situation
Some things are meant to be
So give your best
and leave the rest to me
Leave it all to me
Leave it all to me
Just leave it all to me
-Any votes come in yet?
-Give me a sec.
-You know legs are gonna beat pudding.
-Don't bet on it.
-Who wants a snack?
-I'm good.
Hey, toss me an apple.
-Red or green?
-Red.
'Cause green apples always taste...
Sorry, I put a little
too much heat on that.
-Did you see what she did?
-You should've asked for a muffin.
-Bring up the votes!
-Okay.
Looks like we already got
around 12,000 votes,
and legs are ahead of pudding by about 20%
-Ha!
-Idiots.
-Oh, hey, we got a v-mall.
-Who from?
I don't know. Someone in England.
-Cool.
-Play it.
Greetings, iCarly.
My name is Theodore Wilkins,
I'm the vice chairman
of the iWeb Awards,
an international competition
which seeks out the best web shows
on the Internet,
And I'm very pleased to announce
that our committee has nominated
iCarly in the category of Best Comedy,
Whoa!
We're nominated
for best comedy web show!
I know. I speak British.
The iWeb Awards would like to fly
the iCarly team overseas,
so that your show can compete
at this year's live competition,
All expenses paid, of course,
-This is insane!
-They're gonna fly us overseas!
-I just hope it's not France.
-How come?
-Why?
-'Cause it's full of French people.
-Oh, yeah.
-True.
If you accept your nomination,
please click on the "Accept" button
in the lower left corner of this v-mail,
-Click on it!
-I'm clicking.
Your invitations, passes,
and travel itinerary
will be sent off to you tomorrow,
Congratulations, iCarly.
We'll see you at the iWeb Awards,
All right.
Okay, this is the biggest thing
that's ever happened to us.
-Ever.
-By far.
Check it out. Way more people
are voting for legs than pudding.
Told you.
All I know is you can't do this with legs.
-Uh, you have a little pudding on your...
-I see it.
You sure you don't mind if I hang
at your place till dinner?
Yeah, it's fine, but don't you think
you should go home
and be with your mom?
-What for?
-'Cause she's in bed with pneumonia.
I'm not a doctor.
-Excuse me, Lewbert?
-What?
I'm busy trimming my wart hairs!
Yeah.
I was just wondering if I got a package
yet from the iWeb Awards.
No! Now quit upsetting my wart!
Are you sure?
'Cause this guy in England said
he was gonna send it like a week ago.
To you, too!
Hey. Hey. You think Freddie's home
from school yet?
Yeah, he got a ride. Why?
Bet you he's looking
through his peephole,
waiting for you to get home.
No, he grew out of that.
Uh-huh.
'Sup?
I was not looking out my peephole
waiting for you to come home.
-I know you weren't.
-Good.
-Peeper.
-What?
-Okay, why is it dark in here?
Because...
I made this!
Why?
It's for jogging at night.
This baby puts out over 19,000 lumens.
It can light up a football field.
-For how long?
-Until this battery runs out.
I got it out of a Prius.
Oh, hi, Mrs Benson.
Mom, what are you still doing here?
I thought you left for your pottery class.
I tried to, but my Prius wouldn't start.
Anyway, I forgot.
This package addressed to iCarly
came yesterday...
-Yesterday?
-I'm sorry, I meant to tell Freddie...
Oh, just give it.
-Is that from the iWeb Awards?
-Yeah!
Come on, what country are we going to?
Canada.
Canada?
Just kidding! Tokyo!
We're going to Japan!
All right.
-Freddie, you can let go now.
-Oh, right.
Sweet!
You know, I took a year
of Japanese in college.
A little brush up,
I'll be speaking Japanese like a
Japanesiologist.
Freddie, I'm not sure I can Allow this.
-Here we go.
-Mom.
It's just Japan.
Right, which is why I worry that...
You know the Far East can be very...
Look, just because I can't think
of anything right now,
doesn't mean Japan isn't fraught
with danger.
-Come on, lady.
-It's okay.
I'm going with them, so it's not like
they won't have a responsible adult
making sure everything goes smooth.
Put it out! Put it out! Put it out!
Please, please, please, put it out!
Put it out!
So, I'll make sure
everything goes smooth in Japan.
Freddie, you're not going to Japan.
You're coming home with me
to take a bath.
-But...
Wait!
Why don't you come to Japan with us?
-What?
-I don't wanna take a trip
across the world
with that mess of a woman!
Come on, Mrs Benson. It'll be fun.
What's that?
I think I hear Tokyo calling Toki-you.
Come with us to Japan. You love sushi.
I suppose it would be nice to try
a California roll from where it All started.
Wait, hang on. Little problem.
-What?
-Three plane tickets.
Good.
I mean, "Oh, no."
Here, let me see.
Okay, great, these are first class tickets.
I can just trade these
for five coach seats and we're All set.
All right.
But if we're All going to Japan,
there's lots of preparation to be done.
We'll need passports, fresh underwear,
a voltage converter for your night light.
I don't need a night light any more.
So you're sure the night light
will work in Japan?
We'll make sure.
Man, she's a piece of work.
Put it out, put it out! Get it! Get it!
Why does this keep happening?
L know,
Oomp, if l had a haircut like yours,
l would be embarrassed, too,
So this is Henri P'Twa
and his poodle puppet, Oomp.
Okay, fine, eat your puppy food!
That's the "comedy show"
we're competing against?
One of them.
That poodle puppet eats like a pig.
My goodness, Oomp!
L think you eat like a little piggy!
No, Bad dog!
No, Oomp, bad dog!
-Uh-oh.
-Maybe Oomp should be neutered.
This is my show!
Hello,
-Excellent,
-Thank you.
How are you today?
-Wait, what?
-I'm sorry,
The pain helps you learn,
But I didn't say it wrong!
I was asking you to repeat it!
-Who are you yelling at?
-Him, the Japanese Learning Wizard.
He teaches me Japanese phrases,
and if I don't say them right,
he shocks me with this collar.
I hate it!
-So take the collar off.
-I can't!
It's magnetically locked
until you get past Level One.
How are you today?
- ...what?
-No, no, no.
The pain helps you learn,
The pain is melting my throat!
So, what's with her?
Oh, she teaches you how to speak
Swedish. I bought her when I bought him.
-Why, 'cause she's hot?
-Well, not just 'cause... Yes.
Okay, so what's this other show
we're competing against?
It's a Japanese web show
called Kyoko and Yuki,
They're Japanese?
Great, then they'll have
a home court advantage.
Just put their web show on.
No one's paying you to look pretty.
No one's paying me at All.
-Just click the thingy.
-Okay.
Kyoko and Yuki,
Just teach me
how to play this guitar!
You are the worst student
l have ever taught!
Why do you play the guitar so badly?
L don't know!
-Well, just try!
-Okay!
-Play better!
-I'm trying!
Okay, they're kind of funny.
-Definitely.
-Well, yeah, but you guys are funnier.
Thanks. We just have
to come up with something
totally hilarious to do at the competition.
Okay.
How about you and I play
two kids at a birthday party,
trying to break open a piata?
And let me guess,
Freddie plays the piata?
Yes.
Why does every idea you have
involve hitting me with a stick?
Come on. Let's watch them a little more
so we know exactly
what we're up against.
Well, I'm not worried.
Kyoko and Yuki aren't that funny.
Oh, no! A bee!
-I've seen funnier.
-We'll beat those guys easy.
All right, they're hilarious.
Okay, okay, turn it off!
All right, let's face it,
Kyoko and Yuki are really funny.
-But...
-They're really funny!
So is iCarly,
-We're gonna win that iWeb Award.
-Right.
And even if we don't win, I mean,
it's still an honor
just to be nominated, right?
Yeah, and win or lose,
we still get a free trip to Japan.
Whoa, whoa. I don't wanna hear
this "or lose" talk, All right?
-But I just meant that...
-Saying "or lose" is like giving up.
Carly, when Miss Briggs told us
we couldn't pick the kids
to be in the talent show,
-did you give up?
-No.
And what about the time
those cops were chasing me
and yelling at me to stop running.
-Did I give up?
-No, you kept running.
And, Freddie, have you ever given up
your hope that one day Carly
might love you?
-No.
-Well, you should.
Anyway, we are gonna beat
Kyoko and Yuki
and win that iWeb Award.
You're right. We just got to come up
with the funniest iCarly bit
we've ever done.
-Yeah!
-Absolutely!
-Good. Let's get to work.
-Right.
You guys start. I'm gonna go take a nap.
Hello, how are you?
You are one fine mama jama.
I'm sorry,
Yes.
Hey, Socko,
you talk to your buddy the pilot?
No way, yeah?
He can fly All of us to Japan?
Socko, who's better than you?
Okay, Ryan Seacrest is awesome,
but so are you!
Yeah, text me later.
So, you wanna come to Japan with me?
I'm sorry,
And now,
The Adventures of Melanie Higgles.
I'm Melanie Higgles!
Space cheerleader,
Oh, yeah! Uh-huh.
Oh, yeah, oh, yeah. Uh-huh.
Melanie Higgles.
Oh, yeah! Uh-huh.
What's up? What's up? What's up?
Come to the dark side
of space cheerleading.
No way! Get outer my space!
Oh, yeah!
-Come to the dark side.
-No!
Grow!
-Get out!
-Join me!
-No way!
-You know you want to.
-You're super annoying!
-Come to the dark side!
-Give me an "ow"!
-Ow!
-Give me an "ow"!
-Ow!
-Give me an "ow"!
-Ow!
-Give me an "ow"!
-Ow!
And we're clear!
-So what'd you think?
-Hilarious. It's awesome.
-See?
-We've got our bit
-for the iWeb Awards.
-Yeah, we do.
-So what's next?
-Well, if you guys are interested,
I went online and found All kinds
of interesting facts about Japan.
Well, tell us.
Like when was Japan formed?
What's their economy like?
How does their culture differ from ours?
What are their major exports?
-Are they a democracy?
-How strong is their Navy?
What are the popular foods?
Does Japan have universal heath care?
They don't wanna know.
Sam, maybe you wanna come help us?
No, thanks.
I wanna get my heel really smooth.
Yeah, well, thanks for getting your
nasty foot dust All over our couch.
My mom is a nut case.
You're just now figuring that out?
-Just a few more, Freddie.
-No.
You need to be vaccinated.
But you've already given me 11 shots!
Yes, you're halfway done. Come here.
-No!
-Freddie! Come on, now.
I have a spatula.
Hey, we got to be at the airport
in 45 minutes.
I better finish packing.
-What are those, snacks?
-Uh-huh.
Fat Cakes?
These are low fat Fat Cakes.
For who?
The heath conscious Fat Cake eater?
-Just help me pack.
-Okay.
Just one last shot, Freddie.
Come across the hall
and I'll give it to you at home.
No, let's just do it here
and get it over with.
Um, this one doesn't go in your arm.
Well, then, where does it... Oh, man.
We'll meet you down in the lobby
-in five minutes.
-Hurry!
No, no, Mom, I don't want a shot.
It's gonna hurt so bad,
I'm gonna pass out.
-Okay, we ready?
-Let's see.
Pack suitcases. Done.
Turn off heat. Done.
Keys in pocket. Done.
Crumple list
and toss casually in trash can.
Close enough.
-Do you have the plane tickets?
-We don't need tickets.
Socko says we're gonna be
the only people on the plane.
-You got us a private jet?
-No.
-Better?
-No.
Come on. This way. Keep coming.
Oh, watch where you step.
So, your name is Freight Dog?
Yeah. And this is my pepperoni.
Well, thanks for letting me smell it.
This is your aeroplane?
Yep.
Wow. This is almost as nice
as a gas station men's room.
Thanks.
What are All the possums for?
That's my cargo on this trip.
Anything anybody wants transported
overseas, I fly it.
Are the possums safe?
No, ma'am, they're full of disease.
Okay! Let's fly!
Wait.
Where's the restroom on this plane?
Oh. Here you go.
If you guys fill that one up,
I got more buckets in the back.
Excuse me. I am not going to do
my business in this bucket.
-I am a lady.
-Oh, right.
Sorry. Here.
-That poor bucket.
-Yeah, you have no idea.
-This is insane.
-I know.
I can't believe I'm flying to Japan
on a cargo plane surrounded by possi.
-Possi?
-What is possi?
It's the plural of possum.
No, it's not.
One possum. Many possi.
That's so stupid.
It is not.
I'm having anxiety.
Okay.
-Are you cold?
-Little bit.
Maybe we should snuggle
close together,
-you know, to keep warm and...
-No.
All right.
Hey. Look at me with a possum.
Sam, don't eat him!
I'm not gonna...
I'm not gonna eat him.
Sam, be careful with that thing.
You don't know where it's been.
Like we know where Sam's been.
How's everybody doing?
Shouldn't you be flying the plane?
What do you think this rope's for? See?
-We get it!
-Freight Dog!
Hey, why are you taking All these
possums to Japan, anyway?
Oh, they're not going to Japan.
They're going to Korea.
Possi are the most popular pets
there now.
But wait.
Socko said you're taking us to Japan.
No, I'm taking you over Japan.
-Over!
What?
Here, hold my pepperoni!
-Oh, may I?
-Yeah!
Welcome to Japan!
We should be over Tokyo
in about five minutes.
That's when you jump!
I recommend using a parachute.
Who wants one?
Goggles! Get your goggles here!
Can't go up without your goggles.
Here we go, ma'am.
Take one for yourself!
Here you go, son!
Okay. Thank you!
We're parachuting into Japan?
Can someone hand me the pink bucket?
If you guys wanna land in Tokyo,
you better jump in the next two minutes!
I am not putting on this parachute.
I would rather go to Korea
with the diseased possi.
How could your friend Socko
not have mentioned
that we'd have to jump out
of the plane into Japan?
He might have mentioned it.
He said Freight Dog could drop us
in Japan.
I didn't realize
he actually meant drop us.
We got to get to the iWeb Awards,
so let's just jump.
Guys, there's no way my mom
is jumping out of this aeroplane.
I know how to make her jump.
No chance. She's been afraid
of heights ever since...
O-M-G!
I'm coming, Freddie!
Pechanga!
Okay. Who's next?
Ladies first.
All right.
Oh!
Hold my hand?
Ready?
Shouldn't we count to three first?
Nope! Just scream!
-When?
-Now!
Good job!
Brother!
You got to jump now!
Right.
Sorry. My friend here
is just a little nervous.
Hello,
No! I didn't mean to turn you on!
I'm sorry,
Good job!
-That was insane!
-I know!
-We're in Japan!
-I know!
Where's a sushi bar?
I can't get out of this
psychotic parachute!
Stupid thing.
I can't believe we were forced
to jump into Japan.
When I see Spencer, I am going
to tell him in no uncertain terms
-that I...
Here I come!
Mom!
Come on. Are you All right?
What happened?
-Are you All right?
-Are you okay?
Yeah!
Whoa! Whoa!
That was intense!
Hey, your collar broke.
Oh, yeah! At least now
I don't have to worry about...
I think Freight Dog threw our luggage
out of the plane.
What makes you think that...
The Fat Cakes are okay.
Hey, did anybody see
my red backpack come down?
Okay, I think that's everything.
What happened?
-Finally.
-The front desk is right over there.
-Thank you so much.
-Thank you so much, Officer.
I don't know what we would've done
if you hadn't found us.
Oh. You would have slowly starved
in the wilderness
until you All perished
and were eaten by wild animals.
-Right.
-Well, thanks so much.
-He was nice.
-He was weird.
I took his handcuffs.
-I'll go check us in.
-Haven't you done enough?
-I'll do it.
-I'll go with you.
-Hi.
-Hello. Welcome to Hotel Nakamura.
-May I help you?
-Yeah, we're checking in.
Oh, honeymoon couple?
No. My name's Carly Shay.
We have reservations
through the iWeb Awards.
Yes, let me check and see
what room you are in.
This is a catastrophe!
You must speak with me now.
Excuse me, but we were here first.
I was supposed to have
a separate room for my poopit.
-Your poopit?
-What's a poopit?
-Poopit!
-Puppet?
Okay.
Look, I've had a really tough day
which included jumping out
of a cargo plane full of possums
and wandering in the Japanese
wilderness for seven hours, so I'd...
I cannot share a room with this poopit!
-Sir...
-I got this.
Oomp!
Can I please check in?
Yes, the iWeb Awards have provided
you with a double suite.
-I hope you find the rooms to your liking.
-Thanks.
-Thank you.
-Cool.
-Okay, we're All set.
-Awesome.
Finally.
-Ah! Enjoy your honeymoon.
-Stop saying that!
Oh, nice.
-Cool room.
Check it out.
This is so exciting.
My first pee in a foreign country.
Have fun.
-I've got to crash.
-Me, too.
So, how are we going to split up?
Maybe the boys in this room
and us girls in the other one?
No!
Wouldn't you rather share a room
with your sweet son, Freddie?
Freddie needs you.
-Guys...
-No, Freddie, they're right.
Thanks a lot.
-Hey, where'd Spencer go?
In here!
Look, they leave you these
cute little candies in the bathroom.
I am loving this hotel.
You know they have 24 hour room...
It's soap.
Carly.
Someone's knocking at the door.
Someone's knocking.
I'll get it.
Wake up!
-Who is it?
Kyoko and Yuki.
-Kyoko and Yuki?
-Our competition?
Who are Kyoko and Yuki?
The kids who star in one of the web
shows we're competing against.
What are they doing here?
-Hi.
-Hello. I am Yuki.
Kyoko. Welcome to Japan.
Yes!
Thanks. Come on in.
-Hi.
Hi.
Hey.
I'm Carly, and that's Sam and Freddie.
- Oh, of course.
- We know.
-We love your web show.
-Hey, we love yours.
-Yeah.
-It's awesome.
Oh. And this is my brother, Spencer.
I ate soap.
We just woke up.
At 3:00 in the afternoon?
We slept through breakfast and lunch?
Fat Cake.
What are you guys doing here?
Well, we found out that
you were staying at this hotel...
And we wanted
to welcome you to Tokyo.
Please accept this expensive gift basket.
-Cool.
-Thanks.
So, your trip here was good?
Yeah, the plane ride was pretty insane.
Till we had to jump out.
You jumped out of your aeroplane?
Some jumped. Some were pushed.
We know it sounds weird,
'cause, well, it was weird,
-but we're fine.
-We are.
Some of our luggage fell to its death.
-Drowned in a lake.
-I thought the soap was candy.
Well, if some of your luggage
drowned, as you say...
Would you like us
to take you shopping?
-Shopping?
-Do we have time?
Oh, yes. The iWeb Awards
do not start for five hours.
Plenty of time.
Freddie? Freddie, look at these
wonderful robes the hotel gives you.
Oh, hello.
Could we get a few extra towels
and some unscented toilet paper?
They don't work here, crazy.
They have a web show that got
nominated for an iWeb Award.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
Oh.
They want to take us shopping.
Ooh! I'd like to go shopping.
Oh, well, we would love for you
to join us.
But for the grownups,
Yuki and I have arranged
traditional Japanese
seaweed massages.
-Massages?
-I could use a good rubbing.
Here. Our cousins work at the spa
just down the street.
You will have
a wonderful massage there.
-Awesome.
Well, thank you.
So, shall we go shopping?
Sure, just give us a little time
to shower and get dressed?
-Of course.
-Freddie,
make sure you put on a fresh pair
of anti-bacterial underpants.
Mom.
So, are you nervous about
the competition tonight?
Sure, a little bit.
What, don't you feel All confident
wearing your anti-bacterial underpants?
At least my underwear doesn't have
"I heart Las Vegas"
written across the butt.
You looked in my suitcase?
I did not look in your suitcase!
Hey! There's nothing wrong with
wearing underwear that fights bacteria.
-Yeah.
-Or that was purchased in a casino.
Yeah.
You guys are hilarious.
Just like on iCarly,
well, your guys' show
is really funny, too.
-Thanks.
-Thank you.
Aw! Who brought
his little junior camcorder?
It happens to shoot in high-def.
He told you.
Yuki, weren't we supposed
to turn left back there?
I know where I'm going.
But I think we passed the turn.
I'm driving, okay?
Don't be obnoxious.
And this is real seaweed?
Wow, I feel like a gigantic
spicy tuna roll.
So, you're both cousins
of Kyoko and Yuki.
-Yes.
-Well, my Freddie is very excited
to be competing against them
in the iWeb Awards.
-So is my sister. You ever seen iCarly?
-No.
Well.
-There. You are wrapped.
-Cool.
-So now what?
-Now, we go to see a movie.
-A movie?
-And then maybe go
for some Italian food.
Perhaps some Eggplant Parmesan.
-Wait, we don't understand.
-You will soon.
But when are you gonna unwrap us?
When the iWeb Awards are over.
After Kyoko and Yuki have won.
-What?
-You guys are kidding, right?
Are you kidding?
I don't think they're kidding.
-We've been set up!
-Yeah.
I don't think those Kyoko and Yuki kids
are as nice as they seemed.
The children! We have to warn them!
Relax. This is just seaweed,
how strong can it be?
Fight! Fight, Spencer!
Spencer?
Seaweed can be very strong.
Why don't you just admit that
you are lost?
-Hey, guys...
-I am not lost!
Why must you disrespect
everything I stand for?
-Hey!
-Kyoko.
-Yuki!
-You guys!
Look, we don't even have time
to shop any more.
The iWeb Awards start in two hours.
So let's just head back to our hotel,
so we don't miss it, okay?
Yeah, we don't want that French moron
with the poopit to win by default.
-They are right.
-Yes.
We should get you back to your hotel,
so we can All make it
to the iWeb Awards on time.
-Thanks.
-Thank you.
We are heading back to the hotel, right?
'Cause it looks like
we're in the middle of nowhere.
Okay, we're lost.
I knew it.
I am sorry we spoiled
your welcome to our country.
Oh, come on,
you didn't spoil our welcome.
Why did we stop?
-We're out of gas.
-And now the welcome is spoiled.
You didn't get gas?
Yes, I got gas! Then we drove very far
in the wrong direction,
and now gas is gone!
And the iWeb Awards start
in an hour and a half.
Well, ain't this sweet.
The five of us are gonna
miss the awards,
so Frenchie and his poopit are gonna
win best comedy show on the web.
Can't you guys just call your parents
or someone to come pick us up?
We don't have cell phones with us.
Okay, then, I'll just call Spencer so...
Your American cell phones
don't work in Japan.
You have ruined everything.
I told you when to turn, but you refused!
What about the time
you left my bicycle out in the rain?
That was nine years ago!
I'm still upset!
This is bad.
What are we gonna do?
I'm so hungry.
This is impossible!
I can't believe we're trapped
by seaweed!
-Seaweed.
-Yes!
-Seaweed is edible.
-So?
If I can't break my way out,
maybe I can eat my way out.
It's working! Try it!
I can't! We Bensons have short necks.
Well, don't worry,
I'm gonna have us out of here fast!
This is serious! Why are you laughing?
Something about Japanese arguing
cracks me up.
They're leaving the van.
Why are they leaving the van?
They're fighting!
-Spencer?
-'Sup?
-What are you doing?
-I'm eating!
-Eat faster!
-I'm eating as fast as I can!
I'm out! I'm free!
You're naked.
What happened to our clothes?
Oh, those rotten masseuses took them.
Towels. Don't look!
Don't worry.
Okay. I'm good.
All right. Now chew me out of here.
I can't. I'm full.
Well, use that sword on the wall
to cut me out.
-Spencer!
-What?
Your towel fell off.
Oh, my God!
Hey, hey, hey, give me your camcorder.
Why are you recording this?
To put on iCarly.com.
Kids love violence.
Uh-oh. Yuki's got her now.
You almost kicked me in the head!
We have to make this
look like a real fight.
No problem.
Come on, Yuki! Get up
and show her what your foot tastes like!
Freddie, you're a boy.
Get in there and break it up. Come on.
-No, I don't wanna. I don't wanna.
-Come on, break it up.
-I'm not gonna. I don't wanna.
-Break it up.
-Go. Go.
-Okay. Fine, I will.
Guys! Guys, seriously!
Just break it up, this isn't...
Freddie!
Okay, that is definitely going
on iCarly.com.
-Okay, my towel is on.
-Nice. Let's go.
What's the matter?
Those massage jerks locked us in here.
What? No way.
It's bolted from the outside.
We've got to get out of here.
There's an air vent!
So?
I'm gonna climb in there,
crawl through the duct to another room,
get us out of here.
Okay.
Be careful.
Wow, it's so dark in here.
You see anything?
No, it's so dark in here.
Wait, I see a light!
Oh, good, it probably leads
to another room.
Yeah, I'm heading toward it right now.
What's wrong?
Just threw up a little seaweed.
Well, are you getting any closer
to the vent?
Yep. Just a few more feet.
Getting closer to the light.
There, I can touch it!
-Good! Can you get out?
-I think so.
Yeah! Hey.
-Spencer.
-I didn't know.
-Be careful.
-I got it.
Help! Can't anybody hear us?
Shut up!
-Let's go!
-Come on.
My eye look okay?
Yes.
-For real?
-No.
It's All black and... Ew! It's throbbing.
All right, this fight's getting old.
That's how we do it in Seattle.
-No problem. We had a little incident.
-Pardon us.
-No need to stare. Arigato,
-Don't blame America.
Oh, my God.
The pain did not help me learn!
Ha! I'm wearing a second towel.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I can't believe Kyoko and Yuki
tricked us like that.
It's Freddie's backpack.
And it smells just like his face.
You know, that seaweed
must be awesome for your skin.
Look at me, I'm glowing.
The children have been kidnapped
by evil Japanese web comedians!
What are we gonna do?
Seriously, I'm glowing, right?
I'm really sorry Sam had
to get physical with you guys.
I'm sorry your foot had to get
physical with my eye.
I'm sorry I haven't eaten anything
in four hours.
-Sam...
-Well, listen to my stomach.
I don't want to listen to...
Oh, my God, it sounds like Chewbacca.
Doesn't it?
It is we who owe you an apology...
For ruining your trip to Japan.
And any chance for either of our web
shows to win at the iWeb Awards.
To apologise, please Allow us
to present you with a special gift.
-Why a gift?
-It's a Japanese tradition
to give someone a gift
after you cause them trouble.
Oh, that's so nice. Where is it?
It is in our van.
Yes. We will both go get your gift...
While the three of you stand there.
You guys don't have to give us anything.
Don't disrespect their traditions.
Is it expensive?
It is very special.
-Just stay right there...
-...And we'll be right back.
Hey, I thought the van ran out of gas.
I don't think we're getting a gift.
Maybe they're driving somewhere
to get it.
No, they did All this on purpose
so they could ditch us
and then go win the iWeb Award!
So they're definitely
not giving us a present.
No!
I feel like we've been walking
for nine years.
I can't believe I got a black eye.
Ahhh! It's still throbbing.
Yeah, yeah, so is my head
from All your yapping.
How long till the iWeb Awards start?
Less than half an hour.
There's no way we're gonna make it.
Not possible, zero chance.
Hey, that's the spirit.
I'm just being realistic.
Look, I'm sure Spencer
and Freddie's mom
are doing everything they can to find us.
And anyway, aren't you the one
who gave us
the "only losers give up" speech?
I don't know.
I don't listen to the things I say.
Well, you did, and you were right,
so let's not give up now.
Well, what are we supposed to do?
I don't know. But it's not helping
for you guys to keep talking about
how hungry and miserable you are.
We All know that your eye
is black and throbbing,
and we All know you're starving,
so let's forget that stuff
and try to think positively, All right?
Maybe Spencer and Freddie's mom
will find us in time,
and maybe they'll bring eye ointment
and cheeseburgers.
I just think if we try to keep
a positive attitude,
then maybe we'll...
I'm depressed.
Excuse me, we have an emergency.
Excusez-moi, I am in the middle...
-I don't have time to talk to you.
-You don't have time to talk to me?
We don't know where they are...
Why am I arguing with a poodle
with a mustache?
Here. He's yours if you run away.
Oomp! Oomp, come back! Oomp!
Come back.
Listen, my little sister
and her two friends were kidnapped
by evil Japanese web comedians,
and we don't know where they are,
-so if you could please call the...
-Oh, my God!
-What?
-The chip! In All this confusion,
I completely forgot about the chip.
-Chip?
-What chip?
As soon as Freddie
was old enough to toddle,
I had a locater chip put in his head
by a questionable doctor in Venezuela.
You chipped Freddie?
Oh! I chipped him because I love him.
You mean a locater chip,
like a GPS kind of thing?
Yes! But you can never tell him.
I won't. I won't. How do we find him?
With this.
AUTOMATED VOICE:
Welcome to Global Net,
Please stand by
while we locate Benson, Fred ward,
That is insane!
Come on, come on,
come on, come on.
-Come on.
-Come on.
-Come on.
-Come on, come on, come on.
-Come on, come on, come on.
-Come on, come on, come on.
-Oh, it's blinking!
-Blinking!
-You guys hear that?
-No. Hear what?
Benson
Fred ward, located, 12,7 miles northeast,
-Got him!
-Ha-ha!
Don't worry, Freddie. Momma's coming!
Spencer's also coming!
All right, what is going on?
-What do you mean?
-What's the problem?
I don't know. It's like I can just barely
hear this faint beeping,
like in the back of my head. It's so weird.
You're so weird.
We're All weird. Let's keep walking.
Come on, come on, come on.
Benson
Fred ward is 2,3 miles due east,
All right, we're getting closer!
I am so glad I had that GPS chip
installed in Freddie's head.
Uh, driver, I'm very uncomfortable
back here.
Is there any way
we could open the sunroof?
Yeah, sometimes it opens
if you push very hard.
Okay. Watch your heads.
Okay.
Come on, you little sunroof.
I need to unbend my spine.
There you go.
Okay.
Hey, cool, we're in a tunnel.
Echo!
Oh, no. No!
-What?
-I lost Freddie's signal.
Probably 'cause we are in a tunnel.
Unable to locate Benson, Fred ward,
Here, see if you can get
a signal out there.
Sorry.
Connecting to satellite,
Locating Benson, Fred ward,
I got the signal! No worries! It was...
Oh!
I still don't see
why we have to carry Sam.
Yeah, why are we carrying you?
We're taking turns.
If we ever get lost in Japan again,
I'm gonna carry you guys.
- Yeah.
- Whatever.
-Mr Wilkins.
-Yes, Rolph?
The iWeb Chairman and his family,
in the VIP room, All taken care of.
Excellent.
And were you able to get me a hot dog?
Oh, yes, sir. Right.
Wonderful.
Have All the nominees checked in?
Almost. One of the teams in the comedy
category hasn't shown up yet. iCarly,
Strange.
-Bite?
-No, thank you.
I can't believe you dropped my GPS unit!
The cab hit a bump
and it flew out of my hands.
Well, you should have gripped it
more firmly.
I'm just a person!
Well, now, how are we gonna find
the children?
I don't know.
Maybe we should pull over
and ask those muddy hobos
if they've seen them.
Driver, pull over next
to those muddy hobos.
What's a hobos?
Wait! Those aren't hobos!
Those are the children!
Hey! You guys! Carly!
-Pull over!
-Carly!
-Spencer!
-Are you okay?
-What happened?
-Oh, my gosh.
-Are you okay?
-I'm okay. I'm okay!
I was so worried about you guys.
-Freddie!
-Mom!
Oh, you're All muddy!
Freddie!
-Mom? Mom? Please stop. Please stop.
-Disgusting, honey.
No, no, no. It's okay. Mom!
-You're filthy. Filthy.
-Hey! Hey!
Hey!
Did anyone bring food?
Mom. Mom, I don't think baby wipes
are gonna do it.
All right, I'll sterilise you later.
-How'd you find us?
-Mrs Benson had a chip...
Chippewa!
She had a Chippewa Indian
show us the way.
Is that a black eye?
-Yeah, but I'm fine. It's okay.
-Oh, Fred ward!
No, Mom, you're man-handing me!
Stop. I can't breathe!
The iWeb Awards!
Freddie, Freddie, how long
until the iWeb Awards start?
-About five minutes.
-Oh, man.
But the comedy shows go last.
Well, come on, let's try and make it!
Yeah, let's go.
Hurry up.
We're gonna run out of time, guys.
We only have a few minutes left.
-We gotta go. We gotta go.
-Sorry, honey.
There's room. There's room for All of us.
Okay, I'll sit after you.
You're sitting on me!
Okay, everyone in?
Not really!
Seatbelts on!
Wait! Wait!
No, no, no, stop, stop!
Spencer!
Spencer! Why are you on the ground?
-Just being lazy.
-Well, come on. Come on.
-Hurry. Get up. Come on.
-I'm going! I'm trying!
-Come on, guys, let's go.
-Get the thing. Get the thing.
I'm getting the thing.
I'm getting the thing.
Go, go, go, we're gonna be late!
Everybody, let's go. In! In!
No time.
Five seconds until show.
- Ready camera one.
- First shot up.
-And we're live.
-Go one.
Welcome t
the International iWeb Awards,
coming to you live from Tokyo, Japan!
-The International Web Commission, ,,
-Here we go.
...invites you to watch and vote
online for your favourite web stars,
Now, please welcome your host,
Victor Price!
Thank you. Thanks so much.
Thank you. Okay, settle down.
Settle down now. Settle!
You know, there are so many reasons
why I'm standing here on this stage,
coming to you live from Tokyo, Japan,
hosting the iWeb Awards.
The main reason? well, the Oscars,
they didn't want me, so...
No, no, I'm kidding.
This is actually a huge honor for me.
- Hi! Hey!
- Excuse us!
-We're iCarly,
-From America.
As in the United States of.
We're supposed to be competing
in the iWeb Awards competition.
It's not our fault we're late.
-You can blame Kyoko and Yuki.
-They kidnapped us.
Then ditched us
in the middle of nowhere.
-With no snacks.
-Or a proper restroom.
I wasn't speaking Spanish.
Come on, let's just go in.
-We are performers!
-We're nominees!
One of the teams
we're competing against
tried to cheat by getting rid of us!
-What?
-It's nobody's birthday!
You're so random!
-Ready one. Go one!
One up.
We have a little something special
for you. Are you ready?
Okay, okay. All the way from America,
here they are, Good Charlotte!
Don't you have tickets or passes
or something?
Yeah, they were in our suitcase
that Freight Dog dropped into the lake.
Here, let me talk to the guy.
Okay. Maybe I didn't say that quite right.
Did you understand any of that?
I'm not sure, but I think he called us
dirty street monsters.
Look! We're missing the show.
We need to go inside!
Okay! When I say "now, "
everybody scream and run inside.
-He can't stop All of us.
-I don't think that's a good...
Now!
All right!
Just forget it.
That is fake hair!
What'd I say?
Next up are the nominees
for best cooking show,
I can't believe they won't let us in!
We came this close
and now we finally got here
and we're still gonna lose by default.
-So now what?
-I don't know.
Why don't we All go back to the hotel
and pack up?
No! Do you not get that iCarly
is really important to me?
And to them? This was a big deal for us.
Whatever, let's just get out of here.
No.
I'm going back over
to those security guards.
But they don't speak English.
I'm going to distract them.
When I do, you All run inside that door.
-Now! Come on! Let's go!
-We're coming.
Go, go, go, go, go!
Pechanga!
Okay, that's enough shaking!
The onions are ready for action!
Has the American comedy show team
arrived yet? iCarly?
No, sir, they haven't checked in.
Shame.
Well, go on and mark them as a forfeit.
Let them know in the booth.
Yes, sir. Control booth,
we have a change in the line-up.
-See anyone?
-All clear.
-Let's go!
-Come on. Come on.
Hi. I see you found your hair.
Oh, Oomp, you cannot be in love
with a pussycat!
You come from different worlds!
Ow!
-Okay.
-Mom.
-Freddie!
-Pushy!
None of us speak Japanese.
Oh, good, he's got
a Japanese-English dictionary.
-Okay, he's looking up something.
This is progress.
He's gonna say something.
Hello.
-Hello.
-Hello.
Thank you. Thank you!
Okay, we're gonna have to skip
the web show from America, iCarly,
because they were not able
to make it here tonight,
so up next for best comedy,
please welcome a hometown favourite
from right here in Tokyo,
Kyoko and Yuki!
Look.
Great, we were supposed to go on
before them.
Those are the Internet delinquents
who tricked these children and us.
We were sea-weeded
to massage tables.
We're supposed to be out there!
Lasagne.
Kyoko and Yuki cheated!
That's how I got this black eye.
These kids are nominees.
Why does your soap look like candy?
I have a
bladder infection.
Can't you guys go get someone
that speaks English?
Forget it. These dough-nut holes
can't understand anything.
We have to communicate
with these guys.
-We can't.
-We can't with words.
-Let's act it out for them.
-Act what out?
Everything that's happened to us
since we got to Japan.
Do it!
-Okay, you wanna know what happened?
-Here's what happened.
We do a comedy show on the web.
You know, a show on the Internet.
Comedy. Like...
See? Comedy!
You're eating too fast!
You're eating too slow!
-Turn the cob!
-I'm not ready to turn it!
Turn it!
And then All five of us
got on a horrible aeroplane.
Aeroplane.
And the plane was filled with possi.
Many possums.
-Poosoom?
-Possum!
-Poosoom. Poosoom.
-Poosoom. Poosoom.
So Freight Dog said
we had to jump out of the plane!
-Jump!
-Jump?
-Jump!
-Jump.
-Jump! Jump! Jump!
-Jump! Jump! Jump!
Yes. Yes.
We had to jump out of the plane!
-We lost the graphics.
-No video feed to the big screen.
-Try to fix it. Camera four.
-Four up.
-Jump?
-Jump.
-What's going on?
Who are those girls?
-Kill the big screen.
-I can't.
I don't know where the video feed's
coming from.
- ...with his parachute...
- Parachute!
His feet hit Freddie's mom in the head
and knocked her down.
-Kind of like this, ,,
-Wait, you're not gonna, ,,
Wait, those are the girls from iCarly,
Isn't that the stupid security guard
from outside?
-Go find out where they are.
-Right.
And when we were checking
into our hotel, this French guy...
-...who's also a nominee...
-...Kept butting in with his stupid puppet.
And he was all,
-"This is my poopit,"
-Stupid?
"Look at my beautiful poopit."
"I need a separate room for my poopit."
This isn't fair!
ICarly forfeited.
These girls are a crack-up.
Go eat your lengthy corn.
Hey, I found
where the signal's coming from.
-should I shut it down?
-No way. The audience loves them.
And we thought Kyoko and Yuki
were fighting for real.
So Sam broke up the fight
by flipping them.
Sam?
The video feed's coming from
the utility room by the control booth.
Back in a flash.
And while we were with Kyoko
and Yuki, my brother...
-...and this lady...
-...They couldn't help us
'cause they were getting massages
from Kyoko and Yuki's cousins.
-Massage?
-Massages.
Massages.
See? Massages.
Massages.
And the next thing we knew,
Kyoko and Yuki jumped in their van
and ditched us!
Which made us very sad.
Here you are.
Yes, finally.
Hey, it's the iWeb guy from the v-mall.
-And he speaks English!
-Sweet English!
Indeed.
Get him some cranberry juice.
ICarly people, come with me.
And even though that wasn't exactly
how we planned for the show
to go tonight,
we're very glad to have the performers...
Wow, good crowd.
Wait, so when do we perform?
And why was that funny?
You've already won.
-Huh?
-What do you mean?
The winners of the iWeb Award
for Best Web Comedy Show,
iCarly!
Oh, my God!
-But how'd we win?
-They didn't even see us perform.
-Yeah, they did.
-How?
A little Freddie techno-magic.
Oh, my God!
-Yes!
-Go, Freddie!
-Can I touch it?
-Yeah, let's do it!
-We didn't do anything!
-You can't do this to us!
-We were in the show!
-We're performers.
Stop it. No, you can't do that. No! No!
Stupid poopit!
-I feel seasick.
This is horrible.
- The worst.
- No kidding.
You guys didn't wanna
go back on Freight Dog's plane,
and this was the best transportation
Socko could get us.
Well, Socko should stick
to making socks.
Don't they have any food
on this boat?
Oh, wait, I've got a whole bag
of Japanese candy.
- Awesome.
- Finally.
- This is soap.
- Oh, yeah.
L love iCarly. This cake is for you,
lt says,
iCarly, Carly, Sam and Freddie,
And then, it says, you
rock!
Peace out,
Bye,