MIKE?
YEAH.
OK, MA'AM,
THANK YOU.
NEXT.
HELLO?
YES, SIR, HAVE FUN.
RIGHT THIS WAY.
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
JACKSON, TALK TO ME,
WHAT'S GOING ON DOWN THERE?
I HAVE NEVER EVEN
SEEN THIS PLACE.
WHO TRAVELS
BY BOAT ANYMORE?
A LOT OF PEOPLE DO,
INCLUDING THE GUY
YOU'RE GETTING
READY TO PICK UP.
HIS NAME IS PROFESSOR
IAIN SMYTHE.
RICH CALLED THE SHOTS
ON THIS ONE.
WE'RE JUST ALONG
FOR THE RIDE.
UH-HUH.
THANK YOU, SIR.
I GOT A VISUAL ON OUR
COURIER AND HIS ESCORT.
THEY'RE ALL YOURS.
JUST KEEP IT SIMPLE.
HOLD ON, THAT'S RIGHT.
JACKSON, C.S.A.
SIMON CUSTER, S.I.S.
THIS IS IAIN SMYTHE.
YOU'RE PROBABLY
GOING TO NEED THIS.
ALL RIGHT.
SEE IF I CAN
PULL SOME STRINGS.
PLEASE DO. WE'RE IN
A BIT OF A HURRY.
[OVERLAPPING CROWD CHATTER]
AHH!
AH! AHHH!
TAKE COVER!
TAKE COVER!
Woman: CALL 911!
STOP HIM!
DON'T RUN AFTER THEM!
PROFESSOR, YOU CAN
COME OUT NOW! IT'S SAFE!
PROFESSOR! COME OUT!
DID YOU SEE HIM?
WHERE DID HE GO?
WHERE DID HE GO?
[TIRES SQUEALING]
YOU OK?
YEAH.
HE DIDN'T GE WHAT HE CAME FOR.
FORGET HIM,
WHERE'S SMYTHE?
I THOUGHT YOU HAD HIM.
NO, HE GOT IN THE ELEVATOR
RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.
IT ONLY STOPS HERE,
AND NOW HE'S VANISHED.
BUT AT LEAST WE
GOT THE INFORMATION.
OH, MY GOD,
IT'S MY MOTHER.
SUSAN, NICK...
GRANDMA'S HERE.
HEY.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
WELL, IT'S NICE
TO SEE YOU, TOO.
IT'S FOR YOU.
I MEAN, I WOULD
HAVE PICKED YOU UP
IF YOU WOULD HAVE CALLED!
I AM SO SORRY!
I JUST WANTED
TO SEE MY GRANDCHILDREN,
AND I'M THINKING
OF RETIRING.
- WHAT?
- MM-HMM.
AND I WANTED TO SEE YOU.
OH, LET ME SEE
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE!
[LAUGHS]
GRANDMA! HA HA!
[GASPS] LOOK AT YOU!
IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!
OH, I CAN'T BELIEVE
HOW TALL YOU'VE GOTTEN!
HI, GRANDMA.
HEY, YOU GUYS,
GET HER LUGGAGE, OK?
OH!
OK.
THERE YOU GO.
REMEMBER, SPEED LIMITS
ARE FOR SISSIES.
HOW ARE YOU?
GOOD. WHERE'S JACK?
UH, HE'S INSIDE.
JACK!
POLLY! WELL!
THIS IS A SURPRISE.
JACK. I SEE A LIMP.
WHAT HAPPENED?
DID YOU GET HUR ON THE JOB?
NO, ACTUALLY,
I FELL OUT OF BED.
YOU FELL OUT OF BED?
THINGS HAPPEN.
OH.
GUESS I'M NOT AS
YOUNG AS I USED TO BE.
WELL, UH, COME AND
SEE WHAT WE'VE DONE.
HEY, NICK, WHY DON'T YOU
TAKE THOSE BAG UPSTAIRS?
AND SUSAN, WILL YOU HANG UP
YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S THINGS?
WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO TO GET A
GLASS OF ICED TEA AROUND HERE?
OH, WELL, YOU MUST BE TIRED,
MOM, AFTER THAT LONG FLIGHT.
WHY DON'T YOU GO UPSTAIRS,
I'LL BRING IT TO YOU, OK?
I SAID I WAS THIRSTY,
I DIDN'T SAY I WAS TIRED.
AGENT CUSTER?
THAT'S RIGHT.
FRANK DARNELL, C.S.A.
LONDON WAS
SUPPOSED TO SHARE
SOME VERY IMPORTAN SECRETS WITH US.
WHERE ARE THEY?
IT'S GONE.
THEY'VE GOT IT.
BUT I GOT TO THE CASE
BEFORE HE COULD OPEN IT.
THERE'S NO WAY IN THE WORLD HE COULD
HAVE GOTTEN THAT INFORMATION--
THE INFORMATION WASN'T IN THE CASE.
IT WAS IN HIS HEAD.
THAT'S NICE TO KNOW
AFTER THE FACT.
SHOW ME.
WHERE'S THE BRIEFCASE NOW?
THE COURIER'S GOT IT.
IAIN SMYTHE IS KNOWN IN
ENGLAND AS DR. MNEMONIC,
HE HAS PERFECT MEMORY.
THE BRIEFCASE
WAS JUST A RUSE.
IT'S ALL INSIDE HIS HEAD.
THE INFORMATION
AND CONTACT IDENTITIES
OF 165 OF OUR
DEEP COVER AGENTS
THROUGHOU THE MIDDLE EAST.
HE GOT ON, BUT HE NEVER GOT OFF.
I SAW HIM.
I SAW HIM, TRUST ME.
YOU WANT ME
TO TRUST YOU?
YOU WITHHELD INFORMATION,
YOU MISREPRESENTED
THE MISSION.
MY MISSION WAS TO DELIVER
A COPY OF THE DATA,
I DELIVERED HIM.
IT'S THE 21st CENTURY,
NOW YOU'RE TELLING ME
THAT BRITISH INTELLIGENCE
MAKES THEIR PEOPLE
MEMORIZE STATE SECRETS?
YOU EVER HEAR
OF A COMPUTER?
WHAT IF A COMPUTER'S
HACKED INTO
OR DATA TRANSMISSION
IS INTERCEPTED?
SMYTHE IS
A PROVEN COMMODITY.
HE'S GONE.
THEY GOT ANYTHING?
WELL, THERE'S NO INDICATION
THE HATCH WAS OPENED,
AND THERE'S NOTHING IN THE
ELEVATOR SHAFT, BUT GREASE.
THE LIFT ONLY GOES FROM
THE TERMINAL TO THE GARAGE.
THERE'S NO WAY
HE COULD HAVE GOTTEN OFF.
OK, YOU'RE POSITIVE
HE TOOK THE ELEVATOR, RIGHT?
I TOLD YOU, I SAW
THE DOORS CLOSE ON HIM.
IF HE DIDN'T GET OFF
THE ELEVATOR,
DIDN'T CLIMB OUT OF THE ELEVATOR,
WHERE THE HELL IS HE?
SOON AS WE FIND THAT OUT,
WE'LL CALL YOU.
IN LONDON.
OH, NO.
UNTIL I FIND OUT PRECISELY
WHAT HAPPENED TO DR. MNEMONIC,
YOU AND I ARE SIAMESE TWINS.
I AM STARVING.
AND THAT LOOKS TERRIFIC.
- THANK YOU.
- LOOK AT ALL THAT CILANTRO.
YOU REALLY HAVE TURNED INTO A
CALIFORNIA GIRL, HAVEN'T YOU?
- LOOKS THAT A WAY.
- HERE, GRANDMA.
ALL RIGHT, YOU GUYS,
HOW ABOUT HEARING GRANDMA'S RIDDLE.
WELL, IS THERE A PRIZE?
'CAUSE I'M READY IF THERE'S A PRIZE.
OF COURSE
THERE'S A PRIZE.
ALL RIGHT, THIS ONE
IS A BRAIN TEASER.
JIMMY WALKS INTO A BAR.
MOM, THAT ONE'S
REALLY OLD, OK?
AH, JIMMY WALKS
INTO A BAR AND HE SAYS,
"IT'S MY BIRTHDAY,
POUR ME A NICE COLD BEER,"
AND THE BARTENDER SAYS,
"HOW OLD ARE YOU?"
JIMMY SAYS,
"I'M 16 TODAY."
AND THE BARTENDER
SERVES HIM.
WAIT, BUT HOW WOULD HE...
YOU TELL ME.
I HAVE A CONSULTANT THA I BRING IN ON TOUGH CASES.
I TRY TO USE HER
VERY LITTLE, THOUGH.
WHY, IF SHE'S SO GOOD?
WELL, THE TRUTH IS
I PROMISED HER HUSBAND
I WOULDN'T INVOLVE HER
TOO MUCH-- LONG STORY.
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
HELLO?
HEY, IT'S ME.
OH, HI, FRANK.
HAVEN'T HEARD FROM YOU FOR A WHILE.
WHAT DO I OWE
THIS PLEASURE TO?
THERE'S A VITAL ASSET THAT DISAPPEARED
INTO THIN AIR, IN BROAD DAYLIGHT,
RIGHT IN FRON OF 2 TRAINED AGENTS.
DISAPPEARED INTO THIN AIR?
WELL, THAT'S
KIND OF INTRIGUING.
YOU KNOW WHERE
TO MEET ME, RIGHT?
[SIGHS]
YOU SURE KNOW
HOW TO PLAY ME.
ALL RIGHT, I'LL BE THERE.
ELBOWS OFF THE TABLE.
ALL RIGHT YOU GUYS,
AH, UM...
LET ME GUESS,
YOU GOTTA GO TO WORK.
YEAH, UM...
MY COMPANY'S INVOLVED
IN THIS BIG LAWSUI OVER A PATEN FOR A NEW GAME,
AND, UH, I HAVE TO TURN
IN MY RESEARCH NOTES
BEFORE THE ATTORNEYS GO TO
COURT TOMORROW, AND, I...
YOU'D THINK THEY WOULD HAVE
THOUGHT OF THAT A LONG TIME AGO.
- YOU'D THINK.
- YEAH.
JACK, COULD YOU
SERVE DINNER, BABE?
YEAH, SURE.
MMM...
THERE SHE IS.
THAT'S YOUR SUPER SPY?
THE SOCCER MOM?
YEAH, WELL, LOOKS
CAN BE DECEIVING.
HI.
THIS IS THE CONSULTANT I WAS
TELLING YOU ABOUT-- JANE DOE.
JANE DOE,
VERY MINIMALIST.
OH, WE TRY
TO KEEP IT SIMPLE,
TECHNICALLY,
I DON'T EVEN EXIST.
AH, THIS
IS SIMON CUSTER.
HE'S OUR COLLEAGUE
FROM LONDON.
OH, MI-5 OR MI-6?
7-- TECHNICALLY,
WE DON'T EXIST, EITHER.
SHALL WE GO?
- THERE YOU GO.
- THANKS.
- SO TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED.
- THANK YOU.
SMYTHE WALKED INTO AN
ELEVATOR AND NEVER WALKED OUT.
DO YOU HAVE
VIDEO FOOTAGE OF THAT?
IT'S READY TO GO.
IT'S NICE TO BE BACK.
IAIN SMYTHE IS AN OLD FRIEND
OF MINE FOR MANY YEARS.
THE ONE THEY
CALL DR. MNEMONIC?
THE MASTER OF MEMORY?
YOU'VE HEARD OF HIM?
YEAH, I BOUGHT HIS BOOK
FILE IT AND NEVER FORGET.
- ANY GOOD?
- I CAN'T REALLY TELL YOU.
WHY IS THAT?
WELL, I DIDN' REALLY READ I 'CAUSE I FORGO WHERE I PUT IT.
HELLO, I'M
DR. IAIN SMYTHE,
YOU MAY ALSO KNOW ME AS DR. MNEMONIC,
MEMORY EXPERT.
THIS IS HIS
LATEST INFOMERCIAL.
ABOUT MY NEW BOOK,
FILE IT AND NEVER FORGET.
SHOW ME
HOW HE DISAPPEARED.
OK, THIS JACKSON MEETING SMYTHE
AND CUSTER AT THE TERMINAL.
YEAH, I JUST LEF 'EM FOR A SECOND TO GO CHECK ON CUSTOMS.
YOU SHOULDN' HAVE LEFT 'EM AT ALL.
CAN YOU ISOLATE THE CAMERA
THAT SHOWS THE ATTACK?
SURE.
OH...
WE HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE
TO I.D. THE THIEF YET,
BUT JACKSON DID
RECOVER THE BRIEFCASE.
YEAH, BUT THE BRIEFCASE
WAS EMPTY BECAUSE
WHATEVER DR. MNEMONIC WAS CARRYING,
IT WAS IN HIS HEAD.
HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?
WHY ELSE WOULD YOU
HIRE A MEMORY EXPER FOR A JOB
ANY COURIER COULD DO?
SMYTHE HAD MEMORIZED
THE NAMES, LOCATIONS,
AND FALSE OF IDENTITIES
OF 165 BRITISH OPERATIVES,
EVERY UNDERCOVER AGENT IN THE FIELD,
AND THEIR LOCAL CONTACTS.
THAT'S QUITE
A FEAT OF MEMORY.
THIS GUY MUST HAVE BEEN
SOME SORT OF GENIUS.
ACTUALLY, MEMORY ISN'T ALWAYS
INDICATIVE OF INTELLIGENCE.
THERE ARE SAVANTS WHO CAN
MEMORIZE AN ENTIRE PHONE BOOK,
AND STILL NOT BE ABLE
TO TIE THEIR SHOES.
SMYTHE'S NO GENIUS,
BUT HE CAN BE TRUSTED WITH SHOELACES.
IT'S TRUE HIS MEMORY CAN BE
SOMETHING OF A PARTY TRICK,
BUT IT TO ME IT'S STILL SAFER
THAN ANY ELECTRONIC ENCRYPTION.
AT LEAST IT WOULD HAVE
BEEN IF YOUR PEOPLE
HAD BOTHERED
TO DO THEIR JOB.
HEY, WE GAVE YOUR PEOPLE
EVERYTHING YOU ASKED FOR.
IF YOU'D HAVE BEEN
STRAIGHT WITH US,
WE WOULDN'T BE IN THIS MESS.
- NOW, LOOK--
- HEY, HEY.
OK, WE CAN
ASSIGN BLAME LATER.
BUT RIGHT NOW WE HAVE
A PUZZLE TO SOLVE.
ALL RIGHT?
NOW SHOW ME
WHERE HE DISAPPEARS.
YEP.
THE ELEVATOR HAS ONLY 2 STOPS-- THE
MAIN TERMINAL AND THE PARKING GARAGE.
YOU CAN GET ON ONE,
OUT ON 2, OR VICE VERSA.
THAT'S-- THAT'S
YOUR ONLY CHOICE.
CAN YOU SHOW ME
THE PARKING GARAGE.
THE SECURITY CAM'S MOUNTED
ON TOP OF THE ELEVATOR.
PANNING, SCANNING.
NOW HOLD IT.
FREEZE IT RIGHT THERE.
GO IN TIGH ON THE LICENSE PLATE.
WELL, THOSE ARE
DEFINITELY CALIFORNIA PLATES.
THAT NARROWS IT DOWN
TO ABOUT 30 MILLION OR SO.
STILL CAN'T READ THE PLATE.
JACKSON,
CAN YOU CLARIFY IT?
IT'S GONNA TAKE SOME TIME
WE GOTTA PROCESS IT.
WELL, STILL
NO SIGN OF SMYTHE.
YEAH,
NO PRINTS, NO FIBERS--
NO SIGN THAT THE ELEVATOR
HAD BEEN MESSED WITH AT ALL.
YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES,
WHAT YOU DON'T FIND
IS AS IMPORTAN AS WHAT YOU DO FIND.
WHAT ABOUT THE BRIEFCASE?
NOTHIN'. IT'S CLEAN.
SHOW ME
THE TERMINAL CAMERA.
OH, GOSH, IS THERE
ANY OTHER CAMERA?
I NEED A DIFFERENT ANGLE
ON THE ACTION.
WH-WHOA, WAIT.
GIVE ME
TEN FRAMES A SECOND.
AND ZOOM IN.
THERE YOU GO-- STOP.
THERE'S YOUR ANSWER.
HE WAS KIDNAPPED.
YEAH, RIGHT UNDER
THE C.S.A.'s NOSE.
ALL RIGHT, SHOW ME
THE GARAGE CAMERA AGAIN.
THE THIEF MAKES THE GETAWAY
WITH SMYTHE IN THE TRUNK,
WE'VE BEEN OVER THIS.
WE DON'T HAVE MUCH TIME.
I'M MORE WORRIED ABOU THE CHEMICAL INTERROGATIONS.
HE'S GOT THAT INFORMATION IN
HIS HEAD, DRUGS ARE THE KEY.
MORE LIKE KNOCKING
THE DOOR DOWN.
I'VE SEEN THIS BEFORE,
IN SOUTH AFRICA BACK IN THE EIGHTIES.
IT'S NOT PRETTY.
- NO, IT'S NOT.
- SO, WHAT'S OUR NEXT MOVE?
THE BALL'S
IN THEIR COURT.
HONEY, DO YOU LIKE
MY HAIR LIKE THIS?
I GUESS.
WHY?
EVERY TIME MY MOM SEES ME SHE
PUSHES MY HAIR OFF MY FACE.
WELL, MAYBE SHE'S AFRAID YOU'RE
GONNA GET ZITS ON YOUR FOREHEAD.
[CHUCKLES]
LIKE I'M 12.
TO HER, YOU STILL ARE.
YEAH, I KNOW.
PARENTS SURE KNOW HOW TO
PUSH YOUR BUTTONS, HUH?
THEY INSTALLED THEM.
[LAUGHS]
YOU LOVE YOUR MOTHER, YOU JUS LOVE HER BEST ON A DIFFERENT COAST.
I THINK YOUR
HAIR LOOKS PERFECT.
MMM...
I THINK YOU'RE PERFECT.
[LAUGHING]
I DEMAND $50,000,000
IN TREASURY BILLS.
DID YOU INCLUDE THE NEWSPAPER
IN THE VIDEO THIS TIME?
YES...
I PUT IT NEXT TO
THE GOOD DOCTOR'S FACE.
EXCELLENT.
AND IS TODAY'S DATE
CLEARLY VISIBLE?
YES.
ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY SURE?
YES.
WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
OUT.
YOU CAN'T GO ANYWHERE,
THEY KNOW WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE.
[VACUUM CLEANER WHIRRING]
MOM.
MOM!
AAH!
[VACUUM CLEANER TURNS OFF]
YOU SCARED ME.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
WELL, THE KIDS
WEREN'T HOME FROM SCHOOL.
I GOT A LITTLE BORED,
SO I THOUGH I'D CLEAN UP.
CLE...
MOM, MY HOUSE IS...
AHH. LOOK,
I APPRECIATE THE THOUGHT,
BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO
GO THROUGH THE TROUBLE, OK?
IT'S NO BOTHER.
LOOK, I STRAIGHTENED UP
YOUR BOOKSHELVES,
BUT HAVE YOU EVER
GIVEN ANY THOUGH TO ALPHABETIZING
YOUR CD COLLECTION?
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
I HAVE TO GET THIS.
BUT, PLEASE,
DON'T SHAMPOO ANYTHING
TILL I GET BACK.
HELLO.
HEY, IT'S ME.
WE GOT A RANSOM DEMAND.
Jack: LUCY, I'M HOME!
[DOOR CLOSES]
OK, OK.
I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.
ALL RIGHT.
HEY, HONEY.
[CHUCKLES]
YOU GOT TO GET ME
OUT OF HERE, OK?
HEY, POLLY.
HI, JACK.
- YOU READY?
- FOR WHAT?
AHH, SHE DIDN'T FORGET,
SHE'S JUST TRYING
TO WEASEL OUT OF IT.
QUARTERLY TAX RETURNS.
WE'RE DUE AT THE ACCOUNTANT'S
IN HALF AN HOUR.
REALLY?
WHEN WILL YOU BE BACK?
I DON'T KNOW.
OK. I'LL FIX
THE KIDS A SNACK.
OH, WHERE DO YOU KEEP
YOUR FLOUR SIFTER?
MOM, WHY DON'T YOU
JUST TAKE THEM FOR PIZZA?
WHY DON'T YOU TAKE THEM
TO THE SANTA MONICA PIER
- AND STUFF THEM FULL OF COTTON CANDY.
- YEAH.
DO THEY STILL HAVE
BUMPER CARS
AT THE SANTA MONICA PIER?
[LAUGHS] YEAH.
ALL RIGHT.
YEAH.
HAVE FUN.
YOU'RE A GENIUS.
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?
I DON'T KNOW.
MAYBE GO WATCH THE GAME
AT IZZY'S.
THE THINGS I DO
FOR NATIONAL SECURITY.
[CHUCKLES]
Man, on tape:
DON'T BOTHER TO TRACE THIS.
IN 30 SECONDS
THIS THING IS TOAST.
WE HAVE MNEMONIC.
IT'S 50 MILLION U.S.
OR HIS INFORMATION GOES
ON THE MARKET,
AND YOU CAN SAY GOOD-BYE
TO YOUR PRECIOUS OPERATIVES,
NOT TO MENTION
THE GOOD DOCTOR.
WAIT FOR MY INSTRUCTIONS.
GOT TEX ON THE VOICE ANALYSIS.
AND ON THOSE
BACKGROUND SOUNDS, TOO.
NOW, THIS CAME IN
ON E-MAIL.
IT BOUNCED FROM SERVER
TO SERVER ABOUT 30 TIMES.
IT'S GONNA TAKE US A FEW
DAYS TO TRACE THE I.S.P.
THESE PEOPLE
ARE PROFESSIONALS.
IT'S IAIN SMYTHE.
WE HAVE TO CONSIDER
THE POSSIBILITY
THAT THESE PEOPLE
MAY BE NEGOTIATING
WITH OTHER PEOPLE THAN US.
MR. SMYTHE KNOWS
THE IDENTITIES
OF COVERT OPERATIVES
ALL OVER THE MIDDLE EAST.
I CAN ONLY IMAGINE
HOW MUCH THE OTHER SIDE
WOULD BE WILLING TO PAY
FOR THAT INFORMATION.
LONDON'S TRYING TO PULL
THEIR AGENTS OUT OF THE FIELD,
BUT SOME OF THEM
ARE SO ENTRENCHED.
THEY GOT WIVES,
CHILDREN, FAMILIES.
IT WOULD BE DEVASTATING.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[WHISTLE BLOWING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
COME ON, YOU TWO.
[PASSENGERS SCREAMING]
[LAUGHING]
MAYBE THIS IS
GOOD NEWS.
IT'S A D.M.V. REPOR ON THE CROWN VIC
THAT ALMOST RAN OVER
AGENT JACKSON.
THE CAR IS REGISTERED
TO AN ALEXANDER JENCKS.
HE LIVES IN EAST L.A.
OH, LOOK.
THE CAR WAS STOLEN
3 DAYS AGO.
I COULD GO TALK TO HIM.
Woman: JENNA, WE NEED YOU
IN THE CONFERENCE ROOM.
[GUNSHOTS]
THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE.
HERE. LET ME TRY.
[GUNSHOTS]
WHOO!
ALL RIGHT.
WAY TO GO, GRANDMA.
THANK YOU, BROTHER.
HEY.
- CAN I HELP YOU?
- I HOPE SO.
ARE YOU ALEXANDER JENCKS?
YES, I AM.
AH, WELL, I AM
AGENT JANE DOE, C.S.A.
AND YOU REPORTED A GOLD
1992 CROWN VICTORIA STOLEN
3 DAYS AGO.
RIGHT OU OF THE YARD HERE.
WHAT A PAIN.
WHAT, DO YOU GUYS NEED A
SEPARATE REPORT OR SOMETHING?
UH, NOT EXACTLY.
I WAS JUST WONDERING
IF THERE'S ANYTHING
THAT YOU THOUGHT OF THAT YOU
FORGOT TO TELL THE POLICE.
ANYTHING,
ANY DETAIL AT ALL.
SORRY.
WISH I COULD
HELP YOU OUT.
I'D LOVE TO GE MY WHEELS BACK.
[CHUCKLES]
I'M SURE IT'S A PILE
OF SPARE PARTS
IN TIJUANA BY NOW.
YEAH. WELL, MY HUSBAND
SWEARS BY LOJACK.
AT LEAST THEN YOU'D KNOW
WHERE YOUR CAR IS.
I WENT WITH THE ONBOARD
NAVIGATION SYSTEM.
THOUGHT IT WAS MORE IMPORTAN TO KNOW WHERE I WAS.
- HA HA HA.
- [CHUCKLES]
WELL, LISTEN,
IF YOU THINK OF ANYTHING,
ANYTHING AT ALL,
PLEASE, CALL ME.
"AGENT JANE DOE."
GOT IT.
JUST CALL ME
JOE 6-PACK.
[BOTH LAUGH]
OK, JOE.
ALL RIGHT.
[SIGHS]
[GROANS]
HEY.
YOU'RE UP.
DID YOU THINK THE KIDS
WOULD DO ME IN TOTALLY?
[LAUGHS]
DO YOU IN, WHY?
I WAS HOPING THEY MIGH TUCKER YOU OUT A LITTLE BIT,
BUT...
THAT'S NOT REALLY
POSSIBLE, IS IT?
BOY, YOU LOOK TIRED.
THANKS.
OHH.
COME HERE.
- SIT HERE.
- [GROANING]
MOM.
GIVE ME YOUR FEET.
[CHUCKLES]
COME ON.
THIS WILL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER.
HEH.
UHH.
AHH.
[CHUCKLES]
OH, YOU ARE
THE BEST AT THAT.
[INHALES DEEPLY]
OHH.
SO, WHAT'S GOING ON?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
WELL, IT FEELS LIKE
YOU'VE BEEN AVOIDING ME
EVER SINCE I GOT HERE.
NO, I HAVEN'T.
I'VE JUST BEEN BUSY
WITH MY JOB.
IT'S JUST--
IT'S KIND OF-- IT'S CRAZY.
IT'S GOOD, BUT...
IS THERE SOMETHING
YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME?
IS IT JACK?
IS EVERYTHING ALL RIGH BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU?
YES, EVERYTHING IS FINE.
WE'RE GREAT.
NEVER BEEN BETTER.
I JUST WORRY
ABOUT YOU.
I KNOW.
[INHALES DEEPLY]
[SIGHS]
I LOVE YOU.
I LOVE YOU.
YOU'RE MY FIRST BORN.
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
IT'S HIM AGAIN.
FIND OUT IF HE
EXECUTED MY REQUEST.
IT'S ME.
SHE WANTS TO KNOW,
DID YOU DITCH THE CAR
LIKE SHE ASKED?
HE SAYS HE LEFT IT AT THE TRAIN
STATION WITH THE KEYS IN IT.
GOOD.
HE WANTS TO TALK TO YOU.
SHE'S BUSY.
JUST SIT TIGHT.
WE'LL CALL YOU
WHEN WE HAVE MORE NEWS.
I'M NOT SO SURE
THAT I TRUST YOUR FRIEND.
THAT'S OK.
HE DOESN'T TRUST YOU,
EITHER.
HUH.
WHO MADE BREAKFAST?
OH, GRANDMA DID.
WANT SOME?
NO, NO, NO.
BUT WHERE IS SHE?
OH, SHE'S RUNNING ERRANDS
OR SOMETHING.
HEY, HONEY.
YOU'RE DRIVING THEM, RIGHT?
WELL, YOU SAID YOU WERE HAVING
A CROSSWORD CRISIS, RIGHT?
HAVE I TOLD YOU LATELY
HOW TERRIFIC YOU ARE?
UGH. PUBLIC DISPLAY
OF AFFECTION.
WANT SOME MORE?
WANT A LITTLE MORE?
AW, MOM. MOM!
AHH.
- BYE, HONEY.
- BYE.
BYE.
CALL FRANK DARNELL.
YEAH, IT'S FRANK.
HEY, FRANK,
I THINK I'M BEING TAILED.
IT'S A SILVER CROSSFIRE,
LICENSE PLATE 4RHI994.
HANG ON,
LET ME CHECK IT OUT.
ALL RIGHT.
IT'S REGISTERED TO A NICE
PRICE RENT-A-CAR SERVICE.
I'LL HAVE THEM PULL
THEIR CUSTOMER RECORD.
I DON'T THINK
I HAVE TIME.
WHATEVER'S GONNA HAPPEN IS
GONNA HAPPEN SOON.
I'LL CALL FOR BACKUP.
ALL RIGHT.
I'M HEADING SOUTH
SOUTHWEST ON BALBOA.
CAN YOU JUST TRACK ME ON MY
CAR'S ONBOARD NAVIGATION SYSTEM?
EVEN BETTER.
I'M TRACKIN' YOU WITH THE G.P.S.
IN YOUR CELL PHONE.
AHH.
FRANK, THE ONBOARD
NAVIGATION SYSTEM.
HE NEVER TOLD THE POLICE
ABOUT IT.
WAIT. WHAT POLICE?
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
I HAVE AN IDEA
ABOUT THAT PESKY SEDAN.
BUT FIRST,
I HAVE TO DEAL WITH THIS.
WAIT A MINUTE.
THAT'S WEIRD.
THAT SILVER CAR,
IT'S JUST GONE.
WHAT'S GONE?
[TIRES SQUEALING]
WHAT'S GOING ON?
YOU OK?
NEVER MIND, DARNELL.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
QUARTERLY TAX RETURNS?
I DON'T THINK SO.
YOU'RE BACK
AT THE AGENCY.
ALL RIGHT, YOU'RE RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
I AM. I AM.
I'M JUST BACK TEMPORARILY.
BUT I'M SORRY.
I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO TELL YOU
BECAUSE I KNEW
YOU WOULDN'T APPROVE.
WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?
OH, I DON'T KNOW.
MAYBE IT WAS THE TIME
YOU THREATENED TO DISOWN ME
IF I JOINED
THE NAVAL ACADEMY.
OR THE TIME YOU HID
MY ACCEPTANCE LETTER
TO THE CRYPTOLOGY INSTITUTE
IN SAN--
ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT.
MAYBE I WAS A LITTLE BI RETICENT ABOUT HAVING MY BABY
HAVE A CAREER IN--
[WHISPERING] espionage.
YOU WOULD THINK
THAT A MOTHER
WOULD BE HAPPY,
PROUD EVEN,
THAT HER DAUGHTER WANTED
TO FOLLOW IN HER FOOTSTEPS.
BUT NO, NO.
NO, YOU DID EVERYTHING TO DISCOURAGE ME.
YOU NEVER ONCE
ENCOURAGED ME.
YOU DID EVERYTHING
TO KEEP ME OUT OF THIS GAME.
WHAT IS IT? YOU'RE AFRAID THA I'M GONNA BE BETTER THAN YOU?
OR YOU JUST WAN ONE SPY IN OUR FAMILY?
IS THAT IT, HUH?
DON'T YOU THINK MAYBE
WE OUGHT TO GO SOMEWHERE
AND TALK ABOUT THIS...
[WHISPERING] privately?
Man: I'LL BE
BACK IN 2 HOURS!
COME ON.
BUY ME A CUP OF COFFEE.
SUGAR-FREE, NON-FAT,
DECAF LATTE
AN ICED TRIPLE ESPRESSO,
DOUBLE MOCHA, EXTRA WHIP.
YEAH, DOUBLE THE SUGAR,
DOUBLE THE CAFFEINE.
DECAF? MAN,
THAT'S JUST SAD.
AHH, YOU GOT MY HEAR RATE UP ENOUGH FOR ONE DAY.
SO...
YOU THINK THAT I'M AFRAID
YOU'RE GONNA STEAL
THE LIMELIGHT?
YOU DO LIKE
TO TAKE CENTER STAGE.
WELL THEN,
YOU'RE GONNA LOVE THIS.
THE AGENCY IS PULLING ME
OUT OF THE FIELD.
ON MY NEXT BIRTHDAY,
I'M GONNA HAVE
TO TURN IN MY GUN
AND TAKE A DESK JOB.
CAN YOU EVEN IMAGINE ME
SITTING BEHIND
A DESK ALL DAY?
WELL, IT'S
COMPANY POLICY.
I MEAN, EVENTUALLY
WE LOSE OUR REFLEXES,
WE'RE A DANGER
TO OURSELVES--
EVENTUALLY, MAYBE,
BUT NOT OVERNIGH LIKE THIS.
WHAT IS SO BAD ABOUT GOING
OUT AT THE TOP OF YOUR GAME?
- NOTHING.
- YOU'VE GIVEN 30 YEARS OF YOUR LIFE
TO THE GOVERNMENT.
LOOK, YOU'RE
STILL FABULOUS.
I MEAN, ISN'T THERE
SOMETHING THAT YOU WANNA DO?
THIS IS
WHAT I WANNA DO.
WHY DON'T I COME
WITH YOU TO HEADQUARTERS?
MOM, I DON'T THINK SO,
REALLY.
COME ON.
I JUST WANNA SAY,
YOU KNOW, HELLO
FOR OLD TIMES SAKE.
I MEAN, REALLY.
I PROMISE I WON'T INTERFERE.
I JUST WANT TO SAY
HI AND BYE.
HI AND BYE?
HI AND BYE.
ALL RIGHT.
OH.
IS THAT CUTE
FRANK DARNELL STILL THERE?
YEAH. WHO DO YOU THINK
TALKED ME INTO COMING BACK?
YOU AND HE HAD
A LITTLE SOMETHING GOING ON
AS I RECALL.
DON'T REMIND ME.
I'LL FOLLOW YOU.
I KNOW HOW TO DO THAT.
SHE'S WITH ME.
THANK YOU.
HERE WE ARE.
Man: THIS IS WHAT YOU GE FOR HAVING A GOVERNMENT JOB.
HELLO, FRANK.
WELL, IF IT ISN' THE LEGENDARY POLLY JAMESON.
I DON'T KNOW
ABOUT LEGENDARY,
BUT HI.
WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME
YOUR SISTER WAS IN TOWN?
[CHUCKLES]
I SEE YOU'RE AS CHARMING
AS EVER.
POLLY'S JUST HERE
TO SAY HI.
SHE KNOWS WE HAVE
WORK TO DO.
OH, YOU'RE WORKING
ON A CASE?
THAT'S EXCITING.
MOM.
OK, WHAT ABOU THE GETAWAY VEHICLE?
THE OWNER INSTALLED
AN ONBOARD NAVIGATION SYSTEM,
WHICH MEANS HE HAS A GLOBAL
POSITIONING TRANSMITTER,
AND WE CAN TRACK HIM.
WE CAN DO THAT.
HEH.
WELL, THERE'S NO PROBLEM
GETTING THE G.P.S. INFORMATION.
IT'S JUST WE HAVE TO WAIT FOR
THE SATELLITE TO PICK IT UP.
GOT IT.
ALL RIGHT.
IT'S ON THE MOVE.
CAREY, WE GOTTA GO, BUDDY.
HEY WAIT, FRANK.
SEE WHAT YOU CAN DO
WITH THE VIDEO.
JACKSON, MAKE SURE
JANE DOE GETS
THE SURVEILLANCE FOOTAGE,
WILL YA?
I WON'T BE LONG.
YOU'RE JANE DOE.
I THOUGHT AS MUCH.
YOU'VE GOT FANS
IN WASHINGTON.
THAT'S NICE.
SO, WHAT ARE
WE DOING NOW?
I'M GOING IN HERE
TO WATCH A SURVEILLANCE VIDEO.
AHH, FUN.
AHEM.
MOM, I'M WORKING HERE.
I'M JUST WATCHING.
FREEZE THAT.
- MOM.
- HUMOR YOUR MOTHER.
ALL RIGHT.
I'VE LOOKED AT THIS
A MILLION TIMES.
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO,
READ THEIR LIPS?
NO, NO, NO.
LOOK AT THIS WOMAN RIGHT HERE.
LOOK AT THE SLOPE OF HER SHOULDER,
THE TILT OF HER HEAD.
EVEN FROM BEHIND,
YOU CAN TELL BY THE CURVE OF HER HIPS.
LOOKS INTENTIONAL TO ME.
SHE'S NO AN OLD WOMAN AT ALL.
SHE'S A YOUNG WOMAN IN GRANNY
GLASSES AND A WHITE WIG.
MM-HMM.
AND THAT MUST BE SMYTHE
WITH HER,
DON'T YOU THINK?
FRANK, I'M SORRY.
I FORGOT TO--
UH, FRANK WENT OUT.
HE WAS TRACKING
THE KIDNAPPER'S CAR.
UH...
MARY ELIZABETH JAMESON.
IS THAT YOU?
OH, MY GOD.
CLOSE YOUR MOUTH.
YOU'LL CATCH A FLY IN IT.
[SCOFFS]
SIMON, IT'S SO LOVELY
TO SEE YOU AGAIN
AFTER ALL THESE YEARS.
THE PLEASURE'S MINE.
I DIDN'T THINK
I'D EVER SEE YOU AGAIN.
HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN?
WAS IT... BUCHAREST?
BUDAPEST.
I WORE GREEN, AND YOU WORE
A .38 CALIBER SEMI-AUTOMATIC.
YOU HAVEN'T CHANGED A BIT.
NOT ONE BIT.
YOU ALWAYS WERE
A CHARMING LIAR.
SIMON.
AGENT JAMESON FOUND SOMETHING VERY
FASCINATING IN THE SURVEILLANCE VIDEOS.
QUITE INTERESTING.
LOOK, THERE'S THE PARKING LO WHERE MY CHARGE JUS VANISHED INTO THIN AIR.
I DON'T THINK SO.
LOOK AT THIS WOMAN. SHE'S NO OLD AT ALL-- SHE'S IN DISGUISE.
AND CHECK OUT THE GUY WITH HER.
HE MUST HAVE JUST WALKED OU OF THE ELEVATOR.
I DON'T THINK SO. LOOK
AT HOW SHE'S PROPPING HIM UP.
MAYBE SHE DRUGGED HIM.
NO.
SHE'S GOT A GUN
JAMMED IN HIS RIBS.
FIND A PHOTO OF HER FACE.
Cathy: I'LL SHOW YOU
EVERY SHOT.
WAIT A MINUTE.
ONE OF THE WORKERS THERE IS VIDEOING
THE WHOLE THING WITH HIS CELL PHONE.
LOOK AT THAT! OH!
YOU ARE GOOD.
I HAVE TO GO DOWN THERE
AND TALK TO HIM.
AGENT JAMESON,
ARE YOU COMING?
YOU KNOW, I THINK
I'LL STAY HERE
AND WORK ON THIS
A LITTLE BIT MORE.
OH.
OK.
[BEEPING]
WE'VE LOCKED ON A SIGNAL.
SHOULD BE AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE.
WHERE THE HELL IS HE?
[BEEPING]
I GOT HIM. I GOT HIM.
[BEEPING STOPS]
IN PURSUI OF GOLD CROWN VICTORIA.
LICENSE PLATE 4 JOHN
WILLIAM MARY 213, BOYS.
[TIRES SQUEALING]
HE'S HEADED FOR THE BRIDGE
AT SOUTH STREET, BOYS.
CUT HIM OFF AT THE BRIDGE.
Man, on radio: COPY THAT.
HANG ON.
[HONKING]
EXCUSE ME.
HI. I WAS WONDERING,
DO YOU KNOW THIS MAN?
HE'S WEARING
THE SAME UNIFORM AS YOU.
YEAH, I KNOW HIM.
ANTONIO.
Jack: WE GOT A U-FAP
ON NORTH HILL STREET, GUYS.
BOX HIM IN.
BOX HIM IN. BOX HIM IN!
ALL RIGHT. HE'S MOVING NOW.
HE'S GOING TO BE ON FOOT.
[INDISTINCT TALKING]
[TIRES SQUEAL]
WHOA!
YOU GO THAT WAY.
GOT HIM.
[INDISTINCT]
HEY, STOP!
STAY OUT OF THE WAY, GUYS.
THIS WAY.
MOVE!
GET OUT OF THE WAY!
EASY, FELLA!
Woman: LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
HEY!
[SIREN]
OOF! GET OFF!
HEY, RELAX, MAN! RELAX!
WHERE IS HE?
WHERE'S WHO, MAN?
GIVE ME THE PERCUSSOR AND I
WON'T PROSECUTE THE CHARGES.
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.
I DIDN'T KNOW WHOSE CAR
THAT WAS, ALL RIGHT?
THE KEYS WERE IN THE IGNITION.
- WHERE?
- WHERE WHAT?
WHERE WAS THE CAR
WHEN YOU TOOK IT?
OH, METRO RAIL
PARK AND RIDE.
ALL RIGHT? THING HAD
MY NAME ON IT.
PULL A HEIST, PARK THE CAR
IN A PARKING LOT,
AND YOU HOPE THAT SOME STUPID
JOY RIDER COMES BY AND JACKS IT.
OH, WHAT,
ARE YOU CALLING ME STUPID?
YEAH, I AM. BOOK HIM.
STUPID.
I'M AGENT JANE DOE.
I'M WITH
THE CENTRAL SECURITY AGENCY.
YEAH, RIGHT.
YOU'RE A SECRET AGENT.
AND I'M OSCAR DE LA HOYA.
AH, SO YOU'RE GOING
TO MAKE ME GET ALL BUTCH
AND SHOW YOU MY BADGE, HUH?
ALL RIGHT.
OK, I'LL BITE.
WHAT'S UP?
ALL RIGHT. WELL, LISTEN--
[FOGHORN]
THIS IS YOU ON THE DOCKS
THE OTHER DAY.
WHAT YOU DON'T KNOW IS,
YOU WITNESSED A KIDNAPPING.
AHH, THAT'S WHAT ALL
THAT SCREAMING AND YELLING WAS.
I DIDN'T READ ANYTHING
IN THE PAPERS.
FOR GOOD REASON. IT'S
A MATTER OF NATIONAL SECURITY,
AND I'D APPRECIATE IT IF YOU
DIDN'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT MY VISIT.
BUT WHAT I REALLY HOPE IS THAT YOU
STILL HAVE THE VIDEO ON YOUR PHONE,
AND THAT YOU COULD
GIVE IT TO ME.
YEAH, SURE,
I CAN BEAM IT TO YOU.
[CELL PHONE BEEPS]
THERE YOU GO.
COOL TECHNOLOGY, HUH?
YES.
WANT SOME HOT CHOCOLATE?
NO, BUT THANKS.
HI, GRANDMA.
[CHUCKLES]
YOU ALWAYS READ UPSIDE-DOWN?
HELPS TO KEEP THE BLOOD
FLOWING IN MY BRAIN.
- HEY, GRANDMA?
- HMM?
CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING?
AND YOU PROMISE
YOU WON'T TELL ANYONE?
UH-OH.
SOUNDS SERIOUS.
SHOOT.
MOM'S BEEN ACTING
REALLY WEIRD LATELY.
SHE MAKES LAME EXCUSES
ABOUT WHERE SHE'S GOING,
AND SHE USUALLY COMES IN
REALLY LATE, SOMETIMES.
AND SHE AND DAD GO OFF
AND TALK ABOUT STUFF
I'M NOT ALLOWED
TO HEAR, AND...
ARE MOM AND DAD GETTING
A DIVORCE?
OH, IS THAT WHAT YOU THOUGHT?
WELL, IT'S JUST-- I MEAN,
THERE'S ONLY ONE OTHER KID IN MY
CLASS WHO HAS 2 PARENTS AT HOME.
YOUR PARENTS ARE NOT GETTING
A DIVORCE. I PROMISE YOU.
GOT IT?
GOT IT.
GOOD.
GOTCHA.
Man, on phone: DARNELL,
I LIKE LOOKING AT THIS PILE
OF URGENT MESSAGES FROM MI-6
LESS THAN I LIKE HIDING HERE
IN THE EMBASSY
FROM THE SECRETARY OF THE HOME OFFICE,
A FELLOW I LIKE GREATLY.
NOW, IF IT'S NOT TOO MUCH TO
ASK, WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON
WITH THIS IAIN SMYTHE SITUATION?
WELL, WHEN WE LOST HIM,
WE LOST THE INFORMATION.
YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.
THE REASON WHY, SIR,
IS HE HAD IT MEMORIZED.
SO, WHOEVER TOOK HIM
NOW HAS THAT INFORMATION.
WONDERFUL.
YOU REALIZE THAT WHITEHALL
WANTS US TO GIVE THEM
THE $50 MILLION,
DON'T YOU, DARNELL?
I'LL REMIND YOU THAT THE UNITED
STATES GOVERNMENT DOESN'T PAY RANSOM.
IT'S POLICY.
I UNDERSTAND THAT.
THIS IS RAPIDLY BECOMING AN
INTERNATIONAL DISASTER, DARNELL.
WHAT DO I TELL DOWNING STREET?
WHEN I HAVE AN ANSWER FOR
THAT, SIR, I'LL CALL YOU BACK.
I LOOK FORWARD TO IT.
[CLICKS]
THANK YOU.
[DIAL TONE]
I PUT OUR LITTLE OLD LADY
THROUGH SOME, UH,
BASIC GRAPHICS SOFTWARE,
AND, UH,
MY EYE WAS EASILY MISDIRECTED
BY THE WIG AND THE HAIR,
BUT POLLY AND THE COMPUTER
WEREN'T SO EASILY FOOLED.
LAST NIGHT, I PUT THIS PICTURE
IN PHOTOSHOP,
GOT RID OF THE GLASSES
AND CHANGED THE HAIR, AND--
RIGHT, RIGHT.
YEAH, THAT'S GOOD,
BUT WE NEED A NAME.
DO WE HAVE A NAME?
WELL, WE COULD GET A NAME IF
SHE EVER PASSED THROUGH L.A.X.
SHE MUST NOT BE
ON THE NO-FLY LIST,
BECAUSE YOU CAN'T JUST PUT ON A FUNNY
HAT AND WALK THROUGH HOMELAND SECURITY.
EVERY PASSENGER AT L.A.X. IS SCANNED
WITH FACIAL RECOGNITION SOFTWARE.
AND THEY'RE STORING I IN THE GENERAL DATABASE,
LIKE COMPUTERS DO,
BLESS THEIR LITTLE HARD DRIVES.
WHAT WOULD IT TAKE TO
CROSS-REFERENCE THE VIDEO
WITH THE L.A.X.
PASSENGER DATABASE?
A LOT OF PHONE CALLS
AND A LITTLE BEGGING.
OK. YOU MAKE THE CALLS,
I'LL GO BEG.
SHOULD HAVE A NAME
WITHIN 24 HOURS.
- Jane: GREAT.
- I HOPE WE HAVE 24 HOURS.
$50 MILLION.
WHAT MAKES YOU
SO SURE THEY'LL PAY?
OH, THEY'LL PAY.
THEY'RE NOT GOING
TO LET THE GOOD DOCTOR DIE.
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
DON'T TELL ME. XANDER AGAIN?
[RING]
LET ME TALK TO HIM.
[RING]
XANDER.
I'M SORRY THA I MISSED YOUR CALLS.
YOU KNOW WHAT?
THIS PACKAGE OF YOURS-- IT'S VALUABLE.
MORE VALUABLE THAN YOU SAID.
I PAID YOU TO DRIVE.
YOU DROVE. THE END. NO?
NOT THE END.
I WANT TO GET PAID AGAIN.
FOR WHAT, EXACTLY?
FOR NOT TELLING
AGENT JANE DOE OF THE C.S.A.
WHO PAID ME TO DRIVE.
HMM.
YOUR POINT IS WELL TAKEN.
TELL ME SOMETHING--
WOULD DOUBLING YOUR FEE BE ACCEPTABLE?
I LIKE DOUBLE.
DOUBLE'S GOOD.
EXCELLENT.
ROUSSEAU WILL BRING YOU
THE CASH.
WAIT FOR HIS CALL.
ROUSSEAU?
RIGHT ON TIME.
I KNEW THERE WAS A REASON
WHY I HIRED YOU.
I THOUGHT YOU HIRED ME
'CAUSE I'M CHEAP.
DOUBLE IS NOT CHEAP.
YOU IDIOT.
[GUNSHOT]
THERE'S A GUY
TRYING TO KILL ME.
BROADWAY AND SECOND.
TELL THE C.S.A. IT'S THE THIEF
FROM LONG BEACH TERMINAL.
THEY'LL KNOW!
ASK FOR JANE DOE.
AGENT JANE DOE. HURRY!
[GLASS BREAKS]
GO AHEAD, SIR.
FRANK, IT'S JENCKS.
ALEXANDER JENCKS.
THE OWNER OF THE GOLD SEDAN.
THE ONE WHO REPORTED
HIS CAR STOLEN.
GETAWAY DRIVER DROVE
HIS OWN CAR?
GIVE HIM CREDIT FOR MOXIE.
A LOT OF GOOD
THAT DOES HIM NOW.
ANOTHER DEAD END.
NOT EXACTLY.
WE KNOW WHERE HE LIVES.
TAKE AGENT JACKSON,
GO AND TOSS THE PLACE,
SEE IF YOU CAN FIND ANYTHING
THAT CAN CONNECT US
WITH THIS GUY'S CREW, OK?
YES, BOSS.
I UNDERSTAND THAT.
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
YOU'RE NOT-- YOU'RE NOT--
YOU'RE NOT HEARING ME.
GET-- GET TO ME ASAP.
PLEASE? ALL RIGHT?
- HEY.
- BAD DAY AT BLACK ROCK?
YEAH, YOU COULD SAY THAT.
COME HERE. I'VE GO SOMETHING TO SHOW YOU.
WHAT DO YOU GOT?
NAME'S URSULA VOSS.
INTERPOL BELIEVES SHE MIGH HAVE BEEN EAST GERMAN,
BUT THERE WAS A LOT OF FLUIDITY
BACK THERE IN THE EIGHTIES.
RECOGNIZE HIM?
YEAH. THAT'S THE GUY
WHO GRABBED THE BRIEFCASE.
THAT'S HIM.
NAME'S THIERRY ROUSSEAU.
HIRED MUSCLE.
SHE'S USED HIM BEFORE.
GOT THE WHOLE NINE.
BUNCO, JEWELRY HEISTS,
BANK ROBBERY.
SHE'S A SAVVY OPERATOR,
OUR URSULA.
VERY HIGH-END.
NO ONE'S EVER BEEN ABLE TO PIN
A WHIFF OF ESPIONAGE ON HER.
NO, SHE'S NOT A--
NOT A SPY, SHE'S A THIEF.
WOMAN'S ABOUT GREED.
SHE'LL SELL SMYTHE
TO THE HIGHEST BIDDER
WITHOUT EVEN THINKING
ABOUT IT.
SEND THIS TO JANE DOE.
NICE SECURITY, HUH?
OH.
ANYBODY HOME?
C.S.A.!
CLEAR.
FRUITY PEBBLES,
DING DONGS, TWINKIES...
WHITE BREAD.
GUY SURE HAD ALL-AMERICAN TASTE.
NICE HOUSEKEEPING.
JUNK... JUNK...
SPORTS ILLUSTRATED,
BUT THERE'S A LOT OF JUNK.
HOLD UP.
HMM.
WHAT, DID YOU FIND SOMETHING?
MAYBE.
IT'S A CANDY WRAPPER.
HEY, BEAUTIFUL LADY,
WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?
OH, UM,
ACTUALLY I-I'M LOOKING
FOR THIS-- THIS CANDY.
I'VE BEEN TO 3 STORES ALREADY,
AND I CAN'T SEEM
TO FIND IT ANYWHERE.
OH, YES. YES, I KNOW.
I HAVE THEM SENT US
SPECIAL FROM UKRAINE.
HEH HEH HEH.
OH, THAT'S GREAT.
SOMEONE VERY, VERY SPECIAL TO
ME, UM,
INTRODUCED ME TO THIS CANDY.
OH, THIS CANDY'S VERY GOOD.
DELICIOUS.
LISTEN, UM,
MAYBE YOU KNOW HIM.
HIS NAME IS, UH, ROUSSEAU.
THIERRY ROUSSEAU?
THIERRY ROUSSEAU.
THIERRY ROUSSEAU.
NO, I DON'T THINK I DO.
HERE, HERE'S
A PICTURE OF HIM.
I KNOW HIM.
HE COMES HERE OFTEN.
I KNOW HIM VERY WELL.
THAT'S SO GREAT.
HAVE YOU SEEN HIM WITH HER?
WITH HER?
HOW COULD A MAN LEAVE YOU
FOR A WOMAN LIKE THIS?
I CANNOT BELIEVE IT.
IT'S TERRIBLE BECAUSE
WE HAVE TWINS,
AND THEY'RE NOT EVEN 3 YET.
AW!
PLEASE DON'T CRY.
OH, COME ON.
DO NOT CRY.
HE'S NOT WORTH IT.
HERE, HERE.
IF I COULD JUST SEE HIM, YOU
KNOW?
MAYBE I COULD TALK HIM BACK.
H-H-HAVE SOME TISSUE.
THANK YOU.
YOU KNOW, MAYBE--
MAYBE I CAN HELP YOU OUT.
I DELIVERED SOME GROCERIES
FOR HIM.
I WROTE DOWN HIS ADDRESS.
UH, I HAVE IT SOMEWHERE
AROUND HERE.
OH, REALLY?
HERE, HERE.
HERE. I SHOULD HAVE IT...
RIGHT HERE. THIS IS IT.
JUST AROUND--
JUST AROUND THE CORNER.
- OH!
- 2 BLOCKS.
A-A-AND HAVE SOME
UKRAINIAN CANDIES.
- OH, NO, NO.
- NO, IT'S OK.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE.
ON ME. IT'S ON ME.
NO, PLEASE, PLEASE.
YOU KNOW, HERE. HERE YOU GO.
[QUIETLY] THANK YOU.
FRANK, I THINK I FOUND HIM.
YEAH, I'VE GOT YOUR CELL ON
G.P.S.
DON'T DO ANYTHING
UNTIL I GET THERE.
- WELL, GET HERE QUICK.
- I WILL.
MY SOCCER MOM JUST FOUND
YOUR MEMORY MAN.
WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF?
HE CALLED THE POLICE.
HE SAID THE MAN THEY'RE AFTER
IS TRYING TO KILL HIM.
HE ASKED FOR SOME
C.S.A. AGENT JANE DOE.
CAN WE PLEASE GO NOW?
YES.
ALL IN DUE TIME.
OK?
THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
RELAX.
THERE'S NO NEED TO GET SO UPSET.
EVERYTHING WILL BE FINE.
I JUST KILLED A MAN.
I THINK THAT'S REASON ENOUGH.
WE KILL PEOPLE ALL THE TIME.
PERHAPS I SHOULD KILL YOU.
PERHAPS YOU SHOULD.
[GROANING]
UHH. UHH.
[INHALING SHARPLY]
BRAVO TEAM,
TAKE THE BACK.
ALL RIGHT. STACK ON ME.
BREACH IT, TORRES.
Man: CLEAR!
REICHARD. O'CONNOR,
CLEAR THE BACK.
Man: CLEAR!
THAT'S HIM.
THAT'S THE GUY WHO STOLE
THE BRIEFCASE WITH DR. MNEMONIC.
ANOTHER MAN DEAD.
SHE DID IT RIGHT UNDER OUR NOSE.
Man: AGENT DARNELL!
I GOT SOMETHING!
TAKE A LOOK.
WELL, WE KNOW HE WAS HERE.
DAMN. NOW SMYTHE IS
IN WORSE DANGER THAN EVER.
IT'S ON MY WATCH, FRANK.
SHE TOOK OFF WAY BEFORE YOU
GOT HERE.
WELL, IF I WOULD'VE JUS THOUGHT OF IT AN HOUR EARLIER.
IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.
Man: THIS IS T.L.
GO AHEAD AND SECURE
THE UPPER FLOOR. OVER.
WHAT'S WRONG
WITH THIS PICTURE, FRANK?
AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED
TO TELL US?
THAT'S WHY WE PAY YOU
THE BIG BUCKS.
UH, THERE'S A PIECE
OF THIS PUZZLE MISSING,
AND I HAVE THIS NAGGING FEELING
THAT IT'S STARING ME RIGHT IN
THE FACE,
AND IT'S JUST DRIVING ME CRAZY.
I KNOW THE FEELING.
UH, LOOK, I'M GONNA
RETRACE MY STEPS
AND FIGURE OUT HOW
THIS URSULA WOMAN
STAYS ONE STEP AHEAD OF US ALL
THE TIME.
DO ME A FAVOR,
THOUGH, ALL RIGHT?
NAME IT.
TAKE CARE OF MY MOM
TILL I GET BACK.
KEEP HER OUT OF TROUBLE.
YOU BET.
FIRST JENCKS,
THEN ROUSSEAU.
AND THEN THERE WAS ONE.
ROUSSEAU AND JENCKS.
THEY'RE JUST HIRED HANDS.
THEY WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN ABLE TO
TELL US ANYTHING WORTH KNOWING.
JUST GIVE ME ENOUGH TIME
ALONE IN A ROOM WITH SOMEBODY.
YOU'LL BE AMAZED WHAT I CAN DO.
I WOULDN'T TOUCH THAT LINE
WITH A 10-FOOT POLE.
Woman: YEP. GOT IT LOCKED UP!
UM, AGENT CUSTER TELLS ME
YOU'VE GOT A NEW LEAD.
WELL, WE DID.
IT WENT COLD.
TAKE ONE STEP FORWARD,
WE MOVE 2 STEPS BACK.
IF WE DON'T FIND
IAIN SMYTHE SOON,
MADAM "X" HERE IS GONNA SELL HIS
INFORMATION
TO THE HIGHEST BIDDER.
IT MEANS WE MIGHT RISK LOSING
SOME OF THE FINES S.I.S. AGENTS.
THEIR WIVES, THEIR FAMILIES,
THEIR CONTACTS.
I RECRUITED SOME
OF THOSE PEOPLE.
DON'T WORRY,
IT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN.
JANE DOE IS THE BEST THERE IS.
YOU'LL SEE.
I'LL TELL HER YOU SAID THAT.
AGENT DARNELL,
URGENT CALL FOR YOU ON LINE ONE.
IT'S IAIN SMYTHE.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
[RING]
START A TRACE.
[RING]
SMYTHE, IT'S FRANK DARNELL.
WHAT'S YOUR LOCATION?
[WHISPERING]
I'm in an old caravan
at the dead end
near Collins Road.
She's called Ursula--
Ursula Vlad.
It's a Russian
passport number--
King-4-George-7-
Niner-5-2-Alpha.
She's meeting a buyer.
I think they're terrorists.
Please come quickly.
[DIAL TONE]
HE'S STILL GOT HIS MEMORY.
LET'S GO.
CALL L.A.P.D.
GIVE 'EM A HEADS-UP.
TELL ROBERTS, MARTINEZ,
AND LONG TO MEET ME THERE, OK?
WHAT ABOUT ME?
UH, NO. I'M NOT PUTTING JANE
DOE'S MOM
IN THE MIDDLE
OF A FIREFIGHT.
HOLD UP.
DID YOU JUST CALL POLLY
JANE DOE'S MOTHER?
COURSE.
SHE'S THE IMAGE
OF HER FATHER DOUGLAS.
I CAN'T BELIEVE
I NEVER SAW IT BEFORE.
OK, BEFORE WE PULL OU THE FAMILY PHOTOS,
YOU AND I, WE HAVE TO MOVE,
AND YOU'RE NO LONGER AUTHORIZED
FOR HAZARD DUTY.
THERE'S PLENTY TO DO HERE.
RIGHT.
PLEASE. I DON'T WANT YOU
IN DANGER... AGAIN.
ALL RIGHT, GO.
SAVE THE PROFESSOR.
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
[RING]
[RING]
[RING]
FRANK, WHAT'S UP?
LISTEN, WE GOT A CALL
FROM SMYTHE.
- WHAT?
- YEAH.
HE'S IN A TRAILER AT THE END OF
OLD COLLINS ROAD, OK?
YEAH, WE'RE ON OUR WAY
THERE NOW.
[SPEECH BREAKING UP]
I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
YOU'RE BREAKING UP. YOU THERE?
- FRANK, FRANK--
- YOU THERE?
...BREAKING UP.
I GOTTA FIND THAT BOOK.
[SIGHS]
IT'S THE SAME JACKET.
HE'S WEARING
THE SAME TWEED JACKET.
IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE.
HOW WOULD SHE GET HIS--
IT WAS RIGHT IN FRON OF US THE WHOLE TIME
HIDDEN IN PLAIN SIGHT.
JENNINGS, COVER AGENT SEAL.
Woman: LOOKS LIKE
THERE'S A FIRE.
DON'T FLAG ANYBODY.
Man: GET LOW! GET LOW!
Second man: MOVE UP!
CALL FRANK DARNELL.
Phone: CALLING.
UHH.
Man, on recording:
THE SUBSCRIBER YOU HAVE CALLED
IS OUTSIDE THE SERVICE AREA.
PLEASE TRY AGAIN LATER.
Woman, on machine:
HI, THIS IS THE DAVIS RESIDENCE.
PLEASE LEAVE A MESSAGE
AT THE TONE,
AND WE'LL GET BACK TO YOU.
BYE!
LET'S GO, H.R.T.
TEAMS ONE AND 2, MOVE UP.
[INDISTINCT]
TEAM 3, GET OVER HERE.
ON ME, TEAM 4, ON ME.
RIGHT SIDE, GO.
LEFT SIDE, COVER.
Woman: COVER GOING OVER ONE.
[INDISTINCT]
CALL 'EM OFF.
IT'S A TRAP. CALL 'EM OFF!
ALL RIGHT, HANG ON.
GET OUT OF HERE.
IT'S A SETUP.
POP IT.
[BEEPING]
MOVE! MOVE, MOVE, MOVE!
HOLD IT!
Man: AAH!
Polly: JANE!
AAH!
Jane: AAH!
Both: UNH!
MOM?
MOM?
MOM? OPEN YOUR EYES.
MOM.
SAY SOMETHING.
OK, SAY SOMETHING.
PLEASE, MOM.
Polly: UH.
OH!
OH, MY HEAD.
OH, CATH, YOU KNEW
IT WAS SMYTHE ALL ALONG.
I KNOW. SHH.
[QUIETLY] JUST QUIET.
Polly: OW.
Cathy: SHH.
Polly: OH, BABY.
YOU GOT SOOT ON YOUR FACE.
AH, HA HA.
AH, HEH. OH.
HEH.
HEH.
WELL, THAT WAS
A LITTLE CLOSE.
AT LEAST WE WALKED AWAY.
YEAH.
YOU KNOW, YOU ARE SOMETHING.
IT'S MY JOB.
TAKE CARE OF THAT ONE.
HOW WE DOING HERE, OK?
Both: YEP.
THIS HAPPENED BECAUSE
SMYTHE CONTACTED US.
I DON'T THINK SO.
I THINK WHEN WE GO
THROUGH THAT TRAILER,
WE'RE NOT EVEN GONNA FIND
ONE OF HIS HAIRS.
HE WAS NEVER HERE.
HE LIED TO US?
HE NOT ONLY LIED TO US,
HE SET UP THE WHOLE THING.
AHH!
AHH!
OHH.
HEY.
HEY, YOURSELF.
HEY, MOM, BEFORE WE GO
IN THERE, I WAS JUST...
I JUST WANT TO ASK YOU,
YOU KNOW--
WHAT?
SIMON SEEMS LIKE
A REALLY NICE GUY.
YEAH, HE IS.
AND, UH, AND YOU TWO HAVE
KNOWN EACH OTHER FOR, YOU KNOW,
WELL, SINCE BEFORE DAD DIED,
RIGHT? FOR A LONG TIME?
WELL, YEAH. COURSE,
IN GEOLOGIC TERMS,
THAT'S THE BLINK
OF AN EYE.
WELL, I WAS JUST-- I WAS
WONDER IF, UH, THERE WAS...
BEFORE NOW, ANYTHING
ROMANTIC GOING ON
BETWEEN YOU TWO THA I SHOULD KNOW ABOUT?
WHY SHOULD YOU KNOW ANYTHING
ABOUT MY ROMANTIC LIFE?
BECAUSE YOUR HUSBAND
IS MY FATHER.
AND I JUST...
I DON'T KNOW-- I-- I...
[STUTTERING]
HONEY,
HONEY, HONEY, HONEY,
LISTEN TO ME.
YOUR FATHER AND I HAD
A GREAT 30-YEAR MARRIAGE.
HE NEVER DOUBTED
MY LOVE FOR HIM
AND I NEVER GAVE HIM
ANY REASON TO DOUBT IT.
BUT YOU UNDERSTAND
THE ROAD NOT TAKEN,
DON'T YOU?
I MEAN, THAT ONE
OPPORTUNITY THAT STILL...
SEEMS LIKE AN OPPORTUNITY.
SO HE'S THE ROAD
NOT TAKEN?
YOU SHOULD'VE
SEEN HIM 30 YEARS AGO.
PAUL NEWMAN COULDN' HAVE CARRIED HIS BAGS.
DR. MNEMONIC MASTERMINDED
HIS OWN KIDNAPPING?
YEAH, I THINK SO.
THIS IS HIM GETTING
INTO THE ELEVATOR.
NOTICE THE BLUE BLAZER.
HE'S GOT NO BACKPACK,
NO GARMENT BAG,
EMPTY HANDED.
NOW THIS IS THE FOOTAGE
OF HIM IN DISGUISE.
TWEED JACKET WITH THE
BROWN ELBOW PATCHES.
NOT THE BEST COLORS
IN THE WORLD FOR HIM,
BUT, HEY, TO EACH HIS OWN.
MEN DON'T PAY ENOUGH
ATTENTION TO WHAT THEY WEAR.
- NO.
- WHAT'S THAT HAVE TO DO WITH IT?
IT'S GOT EVERYTHING
TO DO WITH IT.
- LOOK.
- HERE.
LOOK AT SMYTHE'S
BOOK JACKET.
WHAT'S HE WEARING?
SMYTHE'S DISGUISE
IS HIS OWN JACKET.
HOW COULD THE KIDNAPPER GE A HOLD OF SMYTHE'S JACKET,
IF HE WASN'T IN ON IT?
GOT IT IN ONE.
THIS GUY'S BEEN
A RELIABLE SOURCE FOR DECADES.
- I DON'T GET IT.
- [INDISTINCT]
PUT OUT AN INTERAGENCY
ALERT FOR A IAIN SMYTHE
AND URSULA VOSS,
A.K.A. VLAD,
A.K.A. PETERS,
A.K.A. MARQUES.
WHY DON'T YOU GO HOME
AND GET CLEANED UP?
I GOT EVERY PORT IN SOUTHERN
CALIFORNIA COVERED.
YEAH, BUT THEY KNOW THAT.
AGENT DARNELL,
IT'S THEM ON A SECURE LINE.
WE TRIED TO TRACE IT,
BUT IT'S A CLONE AGAIN.
THIS IS FRANK DARNELL,
GO AHEAD.
THIS IS URSULA.
[RUSSIAN ACCENT] I DON'T NEED TO
DISGUISE MY VOICE ANY LONGER, DO I?
WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
THE QUESTION IS WHAT DO YOU WANT?
I WANT WHA I'VE ALWAYS WANTED--
50 MILLION
IN TREASURY BILLS.
THIS IS AGENT JANE DOE.
THAT'S A VERY INTERESTING TRICK,
BLOWING UP THAT TRAILER.
I'M NOT SURE WHY YOU DID IT,
BUT I GUESS YOU WERE
TRYING TO SCARE US.
HOW DO WE KNOW
YOU HAVE MNEMONIC?
PLEASE PAY HER.
I DON'T WANT TO DIE.
IAIN, HOW CAN WE
BE SURE IT'S YOU?
UH, ASK ME TO REMEMBER
SOMETHING.
UH, THE MAGNA CARTA.
"THE KEEPER OF THE LANDS
OF SUCH AN HEIR,
"BEING WITHIN AGE-- "
NO, NO.
THAT'S TOO EASY.
UM, RECITE JABBERWOCKY.
WHAT?
LEWIS CARROLL,
JABBERWOCKY.
AH!
"TWAS BRILLIG,
"AND THE SLITHY TOVES-- "
NO, NO, NO.
THE FOURTH VERSE.
"AND, AS IN UFFISH
THOUGHT HE STOOD,
"THE JABBERWOCK,
WITH EYES OF FLAME,
"CAME WHIFFLING
THROUGH THE TULGEY WOOD,
AND BURBLED AS IT CAME."
PUT URSULA BACK ON.
YES, YES, OF COURSE.
I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY.
YOU JUST TOOK ABOUT A WEEK
OFF HIS LIFE.
NOW, I WOULD BE MORE CAREFUL
IF I WERE YOU.
HE DOESN'T HAVE MUCH TIME.
WHAT DO YOU
WANT US TO DO?
IT'S WHAT I WAN FROM YOU, AGENT JANE DOE.
SINCE YOU HAVE SO MUCH
INTEREST IN THIS CASE,
WHY DON'T YOU COME AND DELIVER
THE RANSOM IN PERSON?
JUST WAI FOR MY INSTRUCTIONS.
HMPH!
YES.
JACKSON.
JACKSON, I'M HERE.
TELL DARNELL
NOT TO WORRY.
AND MAKE SURE
HE STAYS FAR AWAY,
FAR, FAR AWAY, OK?
UH-HUH. COPY THAT.
WISH ME LUCK.
MISS DOE.
AND YOU'RE URSULA?
URSULA, UH...
EXCUSE ME, I DON'T REMEMBER
ALL OF YOUR LAST NAMES.
HMM. VERY CUTE.
OPEN IT UP.
I DON'T LIKE TO WASH
FLORESCENT DYE
OFF MY CLOTHES.
ALL HERE.
VERY GOOD.
YOU DIDN'T PUT ANY NOISY
HOMING DEVICES, DID YOU?
NO.
[LOCKS BRIEFCASE]
LET'S GO.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
WHAT DO I MEAN?
YOU THINK I'M GOING
TO LEAVE YOU HERE?
YOU'RE MY INSURANCE POLICY.
COME ON.
MOVE IT!
WITH JENCKS
AND ROUSSEAU GONE,
WHEN IS IT GOING
TO BE HIS TURN, HUH?
NICE TRY.
I WON'T MISS
AT THIS RANGE.
YOU KNOW, IAIN,
SHE'S GOING
TO GET RID OF YOU,
JUST LIKE SHE
DID THE OTHER TWO.
YOU'RE TOO SMAR NOT TO KNOW THAT.
DON'T LISTEN
TO HER, IAIN.
I'M NOT WORRIED
ABOUT THAT.
IT'S ALL IN MY HEAD,
REMEMBER?
WE CAN SELL IT AGAIN.
HOW MANY NAMES
ON THAT LIST IN YOUR HEAD?
AW, YOU'RE TOO SMAR NOT TO KNOW THAT.
HOW MANY MEN,
HOW MANY WOMEN?
120 OF ONE,
45 OF ANOTHER.
WHAT IS THIS?
ARE YOU TESTING ME AGAIN?
120 MEN AND 45 WOMEN,
WHO WILL BE TRIED AS SPIES.
IAIN, HOW MANY CHILDREN
DO THEY HAVE?
20, 30, 40, 100 CHILDREN
WHO WILL BE ORPHANED
WHEN THEIR PARENTS ARE
TORTURED AND MURDERED.
IS THAT REALLY
WHAT YOU WANT, IAIN?
THEY KNEW THAT GOING IN.
IT'S WHAT THEY SIGNED ON FOR.
YOU KNOW ALL OF THEIR NAMES,
DON'T YOU?
THESE KIDS, HUH?
IT'S ANDY, COLIN, FRANK--
THEY'RE ALPHABETIZED, RIGHT?
ABIGAIL, BRITTANY, COLLEEN,
DENISE, EMILY,
- FRANCES--
- STOP.
DON'T DO THIS.
DON'T.
DON'T.
THAT'S GOOD, IAIN.
CLEAR.
[HELICOPTER]
LOCATION?
UH-HUH.
TAKE A LOOK.
AGENT DARNELL.
HERE.
AFTER ALL
THESE YEARS, IAIN.
TELL ME,
WHY DID YOU DO IT?
WELL, SIMON,
YOU PROBABLY THINK
IT'S FOR THE MONEY
OR FOR URSULA,
YOU'D BE HALF RIGHT.
YOU KNOW, ANY SCHOOL CHILD
WITH AN INTERNET CONNECTION
CAN OUTWIT ME NOW?
I'M OBSOLETE.
YOU KNOW WHA THAT FEELS LIKE,
HAVE NOBODY NEED
YOU ANYMORE?
WATCH YOUR HEAD.
OH, I BET YOU WANT THIS.
OK.
[LAUGHS]
ALL RIGHT.
3 BOUNCES,
BEND THOSE KNEES, BREATHE.
OK. NOW, BEND THOSE KNEES.
AAH!
AHH, IT WAS OK.
OHH!
HEY, MOM,
YOU READY TO GO?
SOMETHING WRONG?
NO. NO, NOT AT ALL.
FOR ME?
- YEAH.
- OH!
YOUR LOCKPICKS-- I...
- I CAN'T.
- YES.
YES, YOU CAN.
I'VE SEEN JANE DOE
IN ACTION AND...
SHE DOES HER MOTHER PROUD.
THAT MEANS A LO COMING FROM YOU.
NOW I FINALLY SEE YOU
IN ACTION AND YOU...
ARE AMAZING.
THAT MEANS A LO COMING FROM YOU.
BUT...
I THINK I'M, MAYBE,
ABOUT READY TO HANG
UP MY SPURS.
THEY WON'T LET ME DO
WHAT I'M GOOD AT ANYMORE.
AND I DON'T WANT A DESK JOB.
SO I'M...
PASSING THE TORCH.
BUT DON'T FEEL BAD.
I'M NOT 30 ANYMORE,
BUT I...
LOVE THIS PHASE OF
MY LIFE THAT I'M IN.
I'M FREE TO DO
AS I PLEASE,
GO WHERE I PLEASE,
AND I'VE GOT SOMEONE
TO DO IT WITH.
NOW YOU'RE
MAKING ME JEALOUS.
MOM--
IT WAS A PLEASURE
WORKING WITH YOU.
LIKEWISE.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
HELLO.
OH, COME IN.
YOU MUST BE SUSAN.
HI, I'M JACK DAVIS.
OH, HELLO, I'M...
SIMON CUSTER,
PLEASURE TO MEET YOU.
I'M HERE TO PICK UP POLLY.
OH, OH.
I'M SO SORRY THAT YOU
HAVE TO LEAVE SO SOON.
NOW THAT THE PUZZLE
EMERGENCY'S OVER,
WE CAN SPEND SOME
QUALITY TIME.
I KNOW, KIT KAT.
I WOULD LOVE TO BE
ABLE TO STAY,
BUT...
SIMON HAS INVITED
ME TO JOIN HIM...
ON HIS VACATION.
AND IT WAS HARD TO TURN
DOWN THE MEXICAN RIVIERA.
OR THE CHANCE TO TRAVEL
THE ROAD NOT TAKEN?
WELL, YOU CAN'T LEAVE
BEFORE YOU GIVE US THE ANSWER
- TO YOUR BRAINTEASER.
- YEAH.
OK.
SO JIMMY WALKS
INTO A BAR,
SAYS TO THE BARTENDER,
"TODAY'S MY BIRTHDAY,
SERVE ME AN ICE-COLD BEER."
SO THE BARTENDER ASKS
HIM, "HOW OLD ARE YOU."
HE SAYS HE'S 16
AND THE BARTENDER
SERVES HIM A DRINK?
BUT THEY'RE NOT IN MEXICO.
OR GUAM.
RIGHT. SO?
I DON'T KNOW.
WELL...
I'M 16 AND I GE SERVED ALL THE TIME.
WELL, I WAS 16
ON MY LAST BIRTHDAY.
FEBRUARY 29.
LEAP YEAR.
- OH.
- YES.
NICE GOING, GUYS.
YOU DO YOUR MOTHER PROUD.
SEE YOU OUTSIDE.
WELL, BYE-BYE, POLLY.
BYE, JACK.
BYE-BYE, MOM.
HAVE FUN.
THANKS.
HAVE A GOOD TIME.
HAVE A MARGARITA FOR ME.
[LAUGHS]
WELL, IT'S GOOD
TO SEE YOUR MOTHER HAPPY.
YES, IT IS.
EMPIRE INTERNATIONAL HOTEL,
KABUL, AFGHANISTAN?
RESERVATION MADE
BY MARY ELIZABETH JAMESON.
YOUR MOM SAID SHE WAS
GOING TO THE MEXICAN RIVIERA.
MOM.