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Jojo Rabbit (2019)
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Jojo Betzler. Ten years old. Today you join the ranks of the Jungvolk, in a very special training weekend. It's going to be intense, but today you become a man. I swear to devote all my energies and my strength to the savior of our country - Adolf Hitler. I am willing and ready to give up my life for him, so help me God. Yes, that's right. - Now, Jojo Betzler, what is your mind? - Snake mind. - And Jojo Betzler, what is your body? - Wolf body. - Jojo Betzler, what is your courage? - Panther courage. - And Jojo Betzler, what is your soul? - A German soul. Yeah, man, you're ready. Adolf? I don't think I can do this. Was? Of course, you can! Sure, you're a little bit scrawny and a bit unpopular, and you can't tie your shoelaces even though you're ten years old. But you're still, the bestest, most loyal little Nazi I've ever met. Not to mention the fact you're really good-looking. So, you gonna get out there and you gonna have a great time, okay? - Okay. - That's the spirit! Okay. Heil me, man. Heil Hitler. Whaat? You can heil me better than that. Heil Hitler. Just throw it away, don't even think about that. - Heil Hitler. - No, you're over thinking it. - Heil Hitler. - Heil Hiteler. Who's Hiteler? Do you even speak German? - Heil Hitler! - That's not the heil, this is the heil - - Heil! - Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! That's it, you got it. Heil Hitler! Have a great day. Heil Hitler! You gonna be the best. Heil Hitler! You can do it. Heil Hitler! Heil Hitler! Oh, komm doch, komm zu Mir Du nimmst Mir den Verstand Oh, komm doch, komm zu Mir Komm, gib Mir deine Hand Komm, gib Mir deine Hand Komm, gib Mir deine Hand Oh, Du bist so schn Schn wie ein Diamant Ich will mit Dir gehen Komm, gib Mir deine Hand Komm, gib Mir deine Hand Komm, gib Mir deine Hand - Heil Hitler, Yorki. - Heil Hitler, Jojo. Are you ready for the best weekend ever? - Yes, I am! - Let's go! Das war noch nie bei einer Anderen Einmal so Einmal so Einmal so Oh, Du bist so schn Schn wie ein Diamant Ich will mit Dir gehen Komm, gib Mir deine Hand Komm, gib Mir deine Hand Komm, gib Mir deine Hand Komm, gib Mir deine Hand - Heil Hitler, guys. - Heil Hitler! Jungvolk, welcome to the Hitlerjugend training weekend. In which we will make men and women of you all. My name is Captain Klenzendorf. - You may call me Captain K. - Captain K! And this is Sub-Officer Finkel. This is Frulein Rahm. Hey, Heil Hitler, everyone. So, a little about me. Who am I and why am I here, talking to a bunch of little titty-grabbers, instead of leading my men into battle to their glorious deaths. Great question. I've been asking myself every day since operation "Screw up". Where I lost a perfectly good eye in a totally preventable enemy attack. And according to my superiors, you need two eyes to be a meaningful part of the war effort. Can two eyed people do this? Jesus! Over the next two days, you, little critters, will get to experience some of the things that my teacher in the army goes through every day. And even though it would appear our country is on a back foot, and there really isn't much hope in that's winning this war. Apparently, we're doing just fine. Anyway. You boys have all been issued with your Deutsches Jungvolk Daggers. These are very special and expensive weapons. You should never be without them. And don't try to stab each other! No stabbing! No stabbing. This is your first step towards being men. Today you boys will be involved in such activities, as marching, bayonet drills, grenade throwing, trench digging, map reading, gas defense, camouflage, ambush techniques, war games, firing guns and blowing stuff up. The girls will practice important womanly duties, such as dressing wounds, making beds, and learning how to get pregnant. I've had 18 kids for Germany. Such a great year to be a girl. All right. Let's get to it. God help me. When I'm lyin' in my bed at night I don't wanna grow up Nothin' ever seems to turn out right I don't wanna grow up Three, two, one - swastika. That's always changing things Makes me wish that I could be a dog When I see the price that you pay I don't wanna grow up I don't ever wanna be that way I don't wanna grow up - Now, finish him. - Don't, don't! The only thing to live for is today... - Fangs. - Fangs, ja. - Serpent tongue. - Serpent tongue, ja. - Scales. - Ja, scales. Because once upon a time a Jewish man mated with a fish. The Aryans are 1000 times more civilized and advanced than any other race. Now, get your things together, kids, it's time to burn some books. Comb their hair and shine their shoes I don't wanna grow up Stay around in my old hometown I don't wanna put no money down I don't wanna get me a big old loan Work them fingers to the bone I don't wanna float a broom Fall in love and get married then boom How the hell did it get here so soon I don't wanna grow up Jews sound scary, huh? Not to me. If I met one, I'd kill it like that. Like... That. But how would you know if you saw one? They can look just like us. I'd feel its head for horns. And they smell like Brussels sprouts. Oh yeah, I forgot about the Brussels sprouts bit. Imagine catching one and giving it to Hitler. That'd be a sure-fire way to get into his personal guards. Then, we would become best friends. I thought I was your best friend. Yorki, you're my 2nd best friend. First place is reserved for the Fhrer. So, unless you're Hitler, hiding in a fat little boy's body, I'd be happy with 2nd place. I guess I'm just a kid in a fat kid's body. Case closed. When you stand before the enemy, and have to end his life. Which of you will have the stomach to do this? Good. There is no room in Hitler's army for those that lack strength. We want hardened warriors. Those, that are prepared to kill at will. - Can you do this? - Yes. Johannes. Can you kill? Pff, of course. I love killing. Good. Come here. Don't be scared. Come on. Good. Kill it. Wring its neck and kill the rabbit. Or are you scared? I'm not scared. I just... Now! Place both hands around its neck, and then one hard twist. He might scream, but we'll just use the boot to finish it off. Kill! Good shot. You are a coward. Just like your father. He's not a coward, he's fighting in Italy. Really? Well, no one has heard from him in 2 years. He is a deserting coward. He's scared, and so are you. You're as scared as a little rabbit. Scared little rabbit. Maybe we should snap your neck too? Jojo the rabbit. Jojo Rabbit. Poor Jojo. What's wrong, little man? Hi, Adolf. Wanna tell me about that rabbit incident? What was all that about? They wanted me to kill it. I'm sorry. I couldn't. Don't worry about it. I couldn't care less. But now they call me a scared rabbit. Let them say whatever they want. People used to say a lot of nasty things about me. This guy is a lunatic. Look at that psycho, he's gonna get us all killed. I'll let you in on a little secret. The rabbit is no coward. The humble little bunny faces the dangerous world every day, hunting carrots for his family, for his country. My empire would be full of all animals. Lions, giraffes, zebras, rhinoceroses, octopuses, Rhinoctopuses. Even the mighty rabbit. Cigarette? No thanks, I don't smoke. Let me give you some really good advice. Be the rabbit. The humble bunny can outwit all of his enemies. He's brave and sneaky and strong. Be the rabbit. Jojo. Are you all right, Jojo? Who were you talking to? Nobody. I thought you were crying. Are you a tear-job specialist? No. Case closed. Now, it's time for Jojo to show those stick insects who is the real cowardly rabbit. I'm sorry, what are you talking about? Never mind. Jojo, where are you going? To be the rabbit! Jojo Rabbit! Hunting carrots, Jojo Rabbit! Hey, this is amazing! We're like two human antelopes. Now, lads. Each of you will be given the opportunity to ignite and throw a grenade. I will personally be supervising each of you to make sure you don't blow your eyes out, or something. All right. Who's first? Klaus! Shit! Don't do that. Jojo! Feldscher, take him in. Jojo! Oh mein Gott, he looks like a Picasso painting. His mother is going to kill me. My darling cub. Hey, kid. My darling little cub. Why so happy? Your son is ugly like a monster. Hey, you're no monster! Besides, your scars will heal and you'll get most of the movement back in your legs. But I'll never be in Hitler's personal guards. You're fine as you are. I'm just happy to have you back home. Mama lion worries about her cub, especially when papa lion isn't here. Or Inga lion. Or Inga lion. Grab the rabbit by the tail, wrap it around his ear. Tie it all up and then stuff him back down the hole. Now then, let's get on our way. I think getting out of the house will do wonders for your recuperation. I don't want to go out there. What? Don't be silly. Of course, you do. I look stupid. People will stare. Enjoy the attention, kid. Not everyone is lucky enough to look stupid. I, for one, am cursed to look incredibly attractive. Now, you're going to pluck up your courage, walk out that door and have an incredible adventure. Okay? Okay. Field Marshall Jojo, you're our top man. Prepare to leave the house. Is it dangerous? Extremely. Heil Hitler! Jesus! Looking good, kid. Frau Betzler, you're looking fetching, as usual. It's because of you my son can't walk properly and has a messed up face. He stole my hand grenade, just took... Yeah, yeah... So, you are going to look after him while I'm at work. Make sure he has a job and feels included, got it? Got it. Yeah, I really got it. Good. Guys, this is Johannes Betzler, a kid I told you about, remember? He stole the hand grenade and blew himself up, and as a result I got demoted for negligence. Now I get to work in this office with all these wonderful kids. So, Jojo, I'm sure we can figure out something for you to do. Ideas? Guys? Okay, we need somebody to walk the clones. Also, I think, maybe he could hand out this new propaganda, and deliver these conscriptions. I don't suppose I could be conscripted, could I? Yes, that's a wonderful idea. Yes, I give my full permission for you to send this 10 year old child into war. Will someone get this kid a gun? And I'll be more than happy to fight in the France. Get in line, kid. Okay, here's the conscriptions. And here's the gun. No. Yuck! Look. What did they do? What they could. Come on. Hey, Jojo Rabbit! Look at your face. I'm going to war, and you are a pup man! Jojo Rabbit! Mama? Field Marshall Jojo is home. Mama? Mama, I'm home. Mama? Mama? Hi. What do you want? Are you a ghost? Sure. A ghost. Don't make me run, kid! I'm far too hungry, and you know how much we love the taste of blood. Lost something? I'm not a ghost Johannes, I'm something worse, but I think you already know that, don't you? You know what I am? - No. - Yes. Say it. Say it! A Jew. Gesundheit. You can't be here. Well, your mother invited me, so, I suppose, that makes me her guest. Not allowed! What will you do sweet Hitlerchen? Of course. Go on then. Tell them. But you know what happens if you do? I'll tell them you helped me. And your mother too. And we'll all be kaput. And if you tell her you know about me. Just one word. I'll do the world a great big favor and cut your Nazi head off. Got it? Yeah. I think I'll hold on to this. It's pretty. Sheesh, that was intense. What am I going to do? Honestly, no idea. I mean, there could be more of them. Hundreds of them, living in your walls. How did she get control like that? She must've used her powers. Mind control. Typical. - You saw how fast she moved? - Yes. Like a little female Jewish Jesse Owens. And now she's got your fancy knife. A knife! Yeah, like a little female Jewish Jesse Owens Jack the Ripper. You're definitely in a pickle, my friend. What to do? Got it! Burn down the house and blame Winston Churchill. Or negotiate. Excuse me? Little girl? Jew girl in the wall? Yoohoo, Jew? Okay, well, I'll just say what I have to say, and that's this, I'm not scared of you and I think you should find somewhere else to live, okay? Not okay. Get, the hell, out of my room. She's pretty rude, you know. That's just my 2 pfennige. And now she's got two knives. I know! How are you gonna chop up stuff? I don't know! And she's still up there too, that thing, that... - Jew! - Yeah, Jew, yeah. What are we gonna do about that Jew? You think of something. Now I'm the expert? Stop offering me, damn, cigarettes! I'm ten! Okay, sorry, I'm stressed out. Okay, let's talk like turkeys. You can't tell your mother or that Jew will cut off your Nazi head. But, there's no reason this thing in the attic needs to ruin your life. In fact, you could use her to your advantage. How? When someone tries to use mind powers on me. You know what I do? Use mind powers back on them. Remember last year, when that one-armed pirate Von Stauffenberg tried to blow me up with a table bomb? - Yeah, you survived. - Correct-a-mundo. But the only reason I survived, apart from having bomb-proof legs, is because I outwitted old Von Stauffy. I let him think that I was dead, when in actual fact I was absolutely fine. By pretending I was dead I drew out all the traitors. So, what are you going to do? - Pretend I'm dead? - Exactly. Wait, no. No, what I mean is this. Make her feel safe, and then she'll drop her guard and then you will be the one in control. Reverse psychology. Don't complicate things. Just use my backwards mind power trick, and everything will be fine. I gotta go. We are having a unicorn for dinner at my place tonight. Concentrate, Jojo. Remember, a Jew living in your wall is better than two Jews flying around with their bat wings, climbing down chimneys and eating innocent Nazis. And don't give her anymore knives! Jews. Darling cub, why are you up? Did you eat anything? Sorry, I lost track of time, I was talking a long walk and having a think... What are we going to do with these laces? My goodness, you know, you'll have to tie them, eventually, you know. - I heard her. - What? Who? Inga. Her ghost. It's so sad for you. You've lost your mind. It's sadder for me though, because I have to live with a crazy person. I heard noises upstairs. Ghosts, honestly? You know what I heard? Rats. Yes, we have them. Can you believe that? Dirty animals, I've been meaning to tell you to stay away from upstairs until I've cleared them all, okay? I don't need you getting sick. Okay, Mama. I'll watch out for those dirty rats. Where are all, the goddamn, knives? Are you going to bed too? Yes, soon. I have to tidy some things first. What things? Mama things. Boy, you have to trust me, okay? I'm the boss here, yeah? I guess. Good boy. Yes, but with one eye. Almost. Not quite. Great! You got it. Yeah. You have to be more quiet, he heard noises up here. If I have to choose between you and my son, I... I won't know where to send you. You hear me? He can't know. If he knows then they know. You could reason with him. You don't know him. He's a fanatic. It took him 3 weeks to get over the fact that his grandfather was not blond. I know he's in there somewhere. The little boy, who loves to play, and runs to you because he's scared of sundown. And thinks you invented the chocolate cake. In the end it's only a way of hope, in that your only remaining child is not just another ghost. Perhaps we all ghosts now, and we just don't know it. Perhaps. You've lived more lifetimes than most. I haven't lived at all. You're being changed. And they say you can't live, that you won't live. If that comes true, then they win. They have been winning so far. They'll never win, that's the power you have. As long as there's someone alive, somewhere, then they lose. They didn't get you yesterday or today, you make tomorrow the same. Hey. Tomorrow must be the same. Jesus Christ! You must stretch. Does that hurt you? Yes. Good. Pain is your friend. Soon your leg will only be a little bit deformed and pointless. I'm going to recommend another month of pool, because your face might scare the other kids. It's kind of ugly. Okay, who's next? Jojo, baby, I have to go. See you at home. Hi, Captain K. Hey, if it isn't the hand grenade himself. How's the leg, kid? It's pretty much healed. It only 80 % hurts now. What are you guys doing? I'm here to teach the HG boys water warfare training. You know, in case they ever need to go to battle in the swimming pool. Can I ask you a question about Jews? Oh God, why? What should I do if I see one? Okay, if you see a Jew, you tell us, we tell the Gestapo, and they tell the SS, and then they go, and they kill the Jew. And anyone who helped the Jew. And, because, these are very paranoid times, probably some other people just in case. It's a pretty joined up process. Even if the Jew hypnotized someone to make them hide the Jew in the first place? I'd be amazed if that could happen. No, it can happen. It happened to my uncle. A Jew hypnotized him, and he became a massive drunk, and a gambler, and he cheated on his wife, and he had an inappropriate relationship with my sister, and then he drowned in an unrelated accident. But it was the Jew's fault. Anyway, did you see one? A Jew? I'm not sure I'd be able to tell if I did. Me neither. Without their funny hats it's damn near impossible. Someone should write a book on the subject. That would make things so much easier. Finky, they are drowning, come on. I'll see you later, little man. Okay, here's the situation. If I tell on you, you'll be in big trouble. And I don't think you want that. But then you'll tell on me and my mother, and we'll be in trouble, which I don't want. And if you tell my mother I know, then she'll kick you out, which you don't want. And if I tell my mother I know, then you'll cut off my Nazi head, which I also don't want. So, it's a Mexican stalemate. It's just a normal stalemate. I have some conditions for allowing you to stay here. - Conditions? - Yes. Tell me everything about the Jewish race. Okay. We are like you, but human. Please take this seriously. Think of this as an expos. I want to know all your secrets. Kindly refrain from sitting on my sister's bed! Boy, she doesn't need it. You know nothing of my sister. Inga and I were friends. I remember you. Such a funny little boy. Enough with the small talk. Start telling me about your kind. Obviously, we are demons, who love money, right? Obviously, everyone knows that. But what people don't know is that we also allergic to food. Cheese, bread, meat. That stuff will kill us instantly. So, if you are thinking of ending my life, that's the fastest way. Also biscuits - lethal. Very funny. Anyway, there's not enough food for you, so I don't know what are you doing to do. Your mother managed to find me some bread. She's kind. She treats me like a person. But you're not. Not a proper person. Are you? How dare you, Jew? You are weak, like an eyelash. I am born of Aryan ancestry. My blood is the color of a pure red rose. And my eyes are blue. Break free. Break free great Aryan. There are no weak Jews. I am descended from those, who wrestle angels and kill giants. We were chosen by God. You were chosen by pathetic little man, who can't even grow a full mustache. The stronger race, huh? So, how is it all going with that Jew thing upstairs? Well, she doesn't want to talk to me. Well, you are a Nazi. I guess. This book is going to be harder to write than I though. What's she doing? She's burning something. What is she burning? What are you burning? She can't hear you. What are you burning? Why so happy? Things are changing. The allies have taken Italy, France will be next. And soon the war will be over. God dammit! Why does that make you happy? You hate your country that much? I love my country, it's the war I hate. It's pointless and stupid, and the sooner we have peace the better. Oh, the war will end. We will crash our enemies into dust! And when they are destroyed, we shall use their graves as... Okay, no more politics. Dinner is neutral ground. This table is Switzerland. Let's eat. You aren't eating. No, I am not that hungry. I might eat later. For now, I'm just going to chew on these grapes. Well, I'm especially hungry tonight, so, maybe, I'll just finish yours. Don't want it to go to waste. How was your day Johannes? Oh, you know, just wandered around, being a deformed kid who has nothing to live for. You are not deformed. My face looks like a, goddamn, street map, woman. I wouldn't expect you to understand. If my father was here, he'd get it. Well, he's not. I know. And instead, I'm stuck with you. - You want your Daddy? - Yeah, I do. Yeah. Fine! Don't you ever talk to your, goddamn, mother like that! Paul, what happened? Paul? I yelled at the kid. What? Go apologize. Sorry, kid. What? What kind of apology was that? Sorry, kid. Jojo. I know you miss me, but I'm.. I'm out there, trying to make a difference in the world. And while I'm gone, I need you to take care of my Rosie. Can you do that? Yes, Dad. Thanks. She's doing what she can. Oh, Gosh. We made a good kid, huh? Damn, that's good! It reminds me of dancing with Rosie in the red salon. You remember, honey? Of course, I do, babe. Hey. Don't just sit there, kid. Come, dance with your parents. So, I'd like you to draw a picture of where Jews live. Where you all eat, sleep, and where the Queen Jew lays the eggs. You really are an idiot. Come on, we have a lot of work to do. Tell me about your family. I'll tell you about the Jews, but you are not privileged to know about my family. But I need background. Why are you hanging around with me, don't you have any friends? Of course! Yorki. - Yorki? - Amongst others. - You don't have anyone. - I have Nathan. Nathan? Who, the hell, is that? My fiance. I have him. Where is he? Fighting in the resistance. See? He proposed to me on the banks of the Fluss. He knelt down like a proper gentleman, recited a poem by Rilke. And when I said yes we danced into the night. Snore. Who's Rilke? A great poet. Nathan's favorite. Oh, Nathan's favorite? Yeah. He's coming to rescue me, and then we'll go live in Paris. You'd turn your back on Germany forever? It turned on me first. Well, we don't need you. You and your stupid boyfriend can shut up and go live in dumb-cheese-snail-baguette land. Now, now, just because you don't have a girlfriend. I'm way too busy for a girlfriend. One day you'll make time. You'll think of nothing else. You'll meet someone, and spend your days, dreaming of the moments you can hold them in your arms again. That's love. Ridiculous. Finished. I said to draw where Jews live. This is just a stupid picture of my head. Yeah, that's where we live. Rilke. Where are you poetry-writing dumbheads? Yes, great thinking, Rabbit. We'll use all of these books to make a fake floor that she'll fall through straight into a pit full of piranhas and lava and bacon. She won't know what hit her. You shush, shush me. Let's get a book and let's go, libraries are dumb. Yeah, this is a really good idea what we are doing right now. If she had a heart, this would break it clean in two. I have something to tell you. I came across an old letter from Nathan, your fiance. Addressed to you. What, the hell, are you talking about? I'll just read it. Dear Elsa, this is hard for me to say, but I don't want to marry you anymore. I found a new woman, and we love a lot, and do the tongue kiss. It's like my favorite poet Rilke says, We need, in love, to practice only this: letting each other go. So, goodbye and sorry about letting you go. From Nathan, your ex-fiance. P.S. I am not really in the resistance. I was lying. I'm unemployed and quite fat now. Don't open the door, but I, actually, forgot that there was a second letter. Dear Elsa, I just wanted to let you know that I don't want to break up with you now. I changed my mind because I don't want you to kill yourself over me. Which a couple of girls have done in the past, and it's pretty stressful. I need you to stay alive. Thank God you've been taken care of by that kid, who I must say is a remarkable young man beyond his years, and brave too. And let's still get married sometime, even though I am truly unemployed and have nothing going for me. Yours, Nathan. - Beethoven. - Einstein. - Bach. - Gerschwin. Brahms. Wagner. Mozart. Musicians, is that all you have? Rilke. Of course, your favorite, Rilke. Jewish mother. - Dietrich, then. - Houdini. No, that's impossible! Believe it brother. Just ask Pissaro, Modigliani, Man Ray, Gertrude Stein, Mr. Moses, and the king of them all Jesus Christi, Amen. You're just saying any old name now. I've never heard of these people, and now I'm fed up. Hey. If you find any more of those letters, would you let me know? Sure. Okay. Bye. These banks used to be full of lovers. There was dancing and singing and... Romance. There's no time for romance! We're at war! There's always time for romance. Someday you'll meet someone special. Why does everyone keep telling me that? Why else tells you that? Everyone. Anyway, it was a stupid idea. You're stupid. Love is the strongest thing in the world. I think you'll find that metal is the strongest thing in the world, followed closely by dynamite and then muscles. Besides, I wouldn't even know it if I saw it. Surprise, surprise. Your shoelaces are undone again. Jojo, you'll know when that happens. You'll feel it. It's a pain. In my arse, I bet. In your tummy. Like it full of butterflies. Yuck. Yeah, yuck. Come on, Shitler, let's get a move on. Hey! What's wrong with you? I'm worried about you, man. Are you drunk? Again? Come on. Can you please untie... You are really getting fat. I'm not... You know what, why don't I just leave you here, okay? And I'll come and get you tomorrow. Okay, how about that? You think you are adult, darling. I'll meet you back at the house, I think, tomorrow morning. You're growing up too fast. A ten-year old shouldn't be celebrating war and talking politics. You should be climbing trees, and then falling out of those trees. But the Fhrer says, when we win, it is us, young boys, who will rule the world. The Reich is dying, we are going to lose the war, and then what are you going to do? Life is a gift. We must celebrate it. We have to dance to show God we are grateful to be alive. Well, I won't dance. Dancing is for people, who don't have a job. Dancing is for people who are free. It's an escape from all of this. Well, you are free to dance your way home. I'll ride. Oh, no, you don't. No one can stop me! Mama, ich rufe dich an, oh Mama Doch einst kommt der Tag Wo ich Dir sag Ich bin ein grosser Mann Welcome home boys. Now go home and kiss your mothers. Und ruhe dich aus Du hast schon genug getan No news from Nathan today, I'm afraid. He's probably doing something amazing, like reading a book or growing a beard. What's wrong? Do you want me to tell you about the Jews? I don't care. In the beginning, we used to live in caves, deep, deep in the center of the Earth. Wait. Scary places, full of strange and wonderful creatures all with one thing in common... Stealing the ends of penises. No, you idiot. The love of art. No cutting penises off? Do you want the story or not? You may continue, but I know it's true, the penis thing. Rabbis use them for earplugs. And moving on. After many years of developing magic and spells, we slowly moved out of the caves and into the towns. Some of us stayed in the caves though, in animal bodies. Which are blobs or something? I'll draw them for you. It'd be better with color. Where's the horns? Under the hair. Where are yours? I'm too young. They grow when you turn 21. These days we live among normal people, but often we take over a house and hang from the ceiling when we sleep, like bats. And another thing is - we can read each others' minds. Oh my God! Everyone's minds? What about German minds? No, their heads are too thick for us to penetrate. Like birds, our true language sounds like singing. And we also attracted to shiny things. Crystals, glass and gold. Attracted to shiny things. But also ugly things. Jews love ugliness. That's another thing we learned in school. You love them, yes? Ugly things? Hi. You two seem to be getting on well. I was just making she was still alive. What do you care? I don't, I just don't want a dead person in my house. How would you like it? I'd love it. More dead people in my house, please. Look, just all the time you two are spending together, it's making me feel very uncomfortable. You suggested it in the first place. Did I? - Yeah. - Oh, yeah, I did. Besides, it's for the book. Oh my God. You are right. I'm sorry. Did I make it weird? It's weird now, isn't it? It shouldn't be weird between us. None of this should be weird. It's fine. I'm just tired. I'm going to bed. Yeah, I was just keeping your bed warm for you, 'cause that's what real friends do. Hey, what do you think about this uniform? I'm not sure about the hips on the pants. Should they be bigger? You look great. Thank you. Now, listen, Jojo, can I give you some really good advice? When you see what's in her mind, and where she's trying to make you go in your mind. In your mind, you must go the other way. You're getting what I'm saying? Do not let her put you in a brain prison. That, dear Jojo, is one thing that cannot and must not ever ever happen to a German! Do not let your German brain be bossed around! I won't let her boss my German brain around, Mein Fhrer. Try not to. Now, I think you've got a lot of good information in your book. It's time to show it to the world, don't you think? Yeah. Adolf? Do you think I'm ugly? Yes. Is he asleep? He's different. He suspects something. He thinks Inga's ghost ends up here. You remind me of her. You really do. I would love to have seen her grow into a woman. But I'll have to watch you instead. I don't know anything about being a woman. Is that what it is? You do things, like drink wine? Sure, you'll drink. Champagne if you are happy. Champagne if you are sad. You drive a car, gamble if you want. Own diamonds. Learn how to fire a gun. You can travel to Morocco. Take up lovers. Make them suffer. You look a tiger in the eye. And trust without fear - that's what it is to be a woman. How do you do that? How do you know you can trust someone? You trust them. Goodnight. All those other things. Did you do that stuff? You know, go to Morocco, and the rest. No, I've never looked a tiger in the eye. Finkel, I meant we'd need dogs for when the city is attacked, not, actual German shepherds. Get them out of here. Get them out of here! Now! Now! Move along please. Thank you. I'm sorry for yelling at you. - I feel so stupid. - No, no. It's a silly name for a dog, I should've been more clear. You're doing a great job. Danke. Hiya, kid. How can we help you today, Master Betzler? What's up? Work with me. If someone turned in a Jew, would they get a medal or something? Oh, Jews, Jews... You still going on about those people? You know, I'm preparing the city for imminent invasion, right? I'm tying the planet defense strategy. I've got Americans to the West. Got Russians to the East. My friend once met some Russians and they ate him. Who's the walnuts? Walnuts are just walnuts, kid. What do you want to talk about? Well, I am learning a lot about Jews. Did you know, Jews can read each others' minds? And when they sleep, they hang from the ceiling, like bats. That's fascinating, where did you come by this information? Research. I'm writing a book. Oh, congratulations. What's it called? "Yoohoo Jew". It's an expos on Jews. You could also call it "Who are you, Jew?". What about "Jews News"? You do have a wonderful imagination on you. - It's real. - Yeah, of course, it's real. When I was your age I had an imaginary friend, called Conny. He used to wet my bed when I was asleep. He got me in so much trouble. Hey, come here, you might like to check out what I'm working on. As part of our preparations for the invasion, I'm redesigning my uniform. Got the feathers for air dynamics. The sparkly color to dazzle the enemy. The boots, purely decorative. And this. This is a Gatling gun, mounted with a radio, which emits annoying music to dishearten the enemy. This is all copyrighted, by the way. That means you can't copy it. Yeah, don't give me ideas, kid. The kids are telling me that your father is away fighting? So, it appears you are now the man of the house, how is that going? It's okay. Ja? So, what jobs do you have for me today? I only got have one, I wouldn't lie. It's a bit of a step-down from what you used to, but we need all hands on deck right now. Metal for Hitler. Pots and pans for the war effort. Here comes the metal man, looking for your pots and pans. Metal for Hitler. Pots and pans. Free Germany. Jojo? Yorki? Hi! You're a soldier now? At your service. But you're only 11. I know. - May I? - Yeah, sure. Is that paper? That's what I thought at first too, but it's "paper-like". It's the latest material, invented by our top scientists. Well, I'm impressed. Hey, Yorki. I caught a Jew. A real one. A Jew? I saw some that they caught, hiding in the Forrest last month. Personally, I didn't see what all the fuss was about. They weren't at all scary and seemed, kind of, normal. I'm getting distracted. I got to go. Bye. Oh my God. It's so hard to run in this thing. I found these. You can have them. They're, probably, broken. Doesn't mean anything. Maybe, you can draw something for my book. I could draw you again. No one wants to see pictures of cripples. You're not a cripple. Besides, true artists don't see that stuff. Blind artists, you mean. It's fine. I'll just accept I'll be one of those guys who never get to kiss a girl. You will be kissed, Jojo. Do you want me to kiss you? Okay. Two things. Thing number one. It's illegal for Nazis and Jews to hang out like we do, let alone kiss. Thing number two. It'd just be a sympathy kiss, which doesn't count. You're not a Nazi. I'm massively into swastikas, so, I think, that's a pretty good sign right there. You're not a Nazi, Jojo. You're a 10-year-old kid, who likes swastikas and likes dressing up in a funny uniform, and wants to be part of a club. But you're not one of them. Okay. Let's just agree to disagree, all right? Not a Nazi. What a dirty Jew! Come on, hide! Hurry, go! Heil Hitler. Allow me to introduce myself, I am Captain Herman Deertz of Falkenheim Gestapo. With me Herr Mller, Herr Junker, Herr Klum, and Herr Frosch. May we come in? Thank you so much. Heil Hitler. Hey, Jojo. Hey, guys. Good to see you. My bicycle got a flat tire, so I carried it. Captain Klenzendorf? Heil Hitler! You know Freddie Finkel? Heil Hitler. So, did I miss anything? No, no. We we just heil Hiltering the boy and then heil Hiltering yourself, and then, of course, heil Hiltering Freddie Finkel, and now we in the midst of a routine inspection. And what brings you here, captain? We were just passing by, and we thought we'd drop off some pamphlets for the boy. He works for us. I see. And yourself? You know how it is. Every day we take a call. Hello, is that the Gestapo? I believe there's a Communist, hiding behind my fridge. We go around to investigate, it's just some mold. So, not far off. It's all part of the job. Now, this is my kind of little boy's bedroom. Oh, yes. There he is. You and your friends may have heard a rumor that Hitler only has one ball, this is nonsense. He has four. So, you are volunteering at the Hitlerjugend office, yes? Yes. Good for you. I wish more of our young boys had your blind fanaticism. What on earth are those oafs up to? Why don't we go upstairs and see, yes? Do you know where your mother is? No. I think she's in town. Has she been spending much time at home? She is quite busy. Is she? Well, I'm pleased to see that you're wearing your Jugend uniform, but where is your knife? You must always carry your DJ knife, where is it? I... Left... It's here. And who might you be? And who might you be? And what are you doing in my house? You live here too? I'm his sister, Inga. Heil Hitler. Heil Hitler. I did not know you have a sister, Johannes. Sometimes he'd prefer if I was dead. Isn't that right, little Frankenstein? Now, now, there's no need to attack his hideous physical deformity. That is a war wound. But... Why do you have his knife? I'm guarding my room, because he refuses to stay out of it. What do you have hidden in there? You know, girl's stuff. May I? Naturally. You see, we deal with an inordinate number of reports, denunciations, and general investigations, and, of course, we are indeed interested in problems of crime and anti party sentiment. But we still have one greater concern. That's of the Goldilocksies, sneaking around, eating other people's food. Sleeping in the beds, it really is quite rude. I don't suppose I could see your papers, could I? Papers, Miss Betzler. Quickly, please, we don't have all day. Yes, of course. How old are you in this photo? They're 3 years old, I was 14. Date of birth? 1st of May. 1929. Correct. Thank you, Inga. Get a new photo, you look like a ghost in this one. Wait! What is this? "Yoohoo Jew". Tell me who did this. I did. It's an expos on Jews. How they think, behave, look, it'll be a gift to the Fhrer. Guys, you have to see this. Look at this one. He has a tail. There's one of them, hanging upside down like a bat. This one here, it is a drawing of their heads. And who is operating the machinery of their brains? The Devil. It's funny 'cause it's true. Look at this little stupid Jew. There they are with horns. What is this? Die Nathan, die. Ways of killing Nathan. Nathan, being tortured by snakes. Poked with sticks. Being fired from a cannon. Just being cold names. Nathan, being crushed under the wheel of penny farthing bicycle. Who is Nathan, please? Just some boy. Nathan, being roasted over an open fire. It reminds me. We must get back. Remember, 'cause we left that guy, hanging up. Thank you for this, you have really made my day. I do hope you continue with it. And, of course, if you see anything suspicious give us a ring. Good day. Heil Hitler. Nice to meet you, Inga. Stay home, Jojo. Look after your family. Look after this knife. Elsa, you fooled them! May 7th. What? She was born on the 7th. Not the 1st. He was helping us. They'll be back. They'll figure out she's dead, then I'll be dead. Nobody really knows Inga died. You could be her. I'll tell Mama everything when she gets home. That I know you, and that we're friends. Jew and Nazi are not friends. Man, that was a complete bust. Mind explaining that? She's not... She doesn't seem like a bad person. I am beginning to question your loyalty to myself and the party. You call yourself a patriot? Yet, where is the evidence? The German soldier was born out of necessity. Germany depends on the passion of these young men. Passion and readiness to fall for the Fatherland, despite the futile efforts of ally war profiteers, who send their ill-prepared armies, clumsily, into the lair of the wolf. And only zealous men, who stand steadfast in the face of the enemy will be etched in German memory forever. And it is up to you to decide if you want to be remembered, or disappear without a trace, like a pitiful grain of sand into a dessert of insignificance. To put it plainly. Get your shit together and sort out your priorities. You're 10, Jojo. Start acting like it. Did you know? She didn't tell me much. Only that she worked with her friends and your father was, somehow, involved from afar. No, he's fighting in the war. She said he'll be home as soon as the war is over. She didn't want to tell you anything for obvious reasons. Because she hated me. 'Cause I'm a Nazi. I'm the enemy. She didn't want you to know anything that could get you in trouble. But now I have nothing. No one. The last time I saw my parents was at the station. They were put on the train. I ran. Slowly, found my way back to the city. A friend of my father's hid me. Then, another friend, then friends of friends... Till your mother took me in. And so far I am still here. But my parents went to a place you don't come back from. What's the first thing you'll do when you're free? Dance. Everybody's gotta live And everybody's gonna die Everybody's gotta live I think you know the reason why Sometimes the going gets so good Then again it gets pretty rough But when I have you in my arms baby You know I just can't, I just can't get enough Oh yeah Everybody's gotta live And everybody's gonna die Everybody's try to have a good time I think you know the reason why I feel like I've seen just about a million sunsets She said if you're with me I'll never go away That's when I stopped and I took another look at my baby She said if you're with me I'll never go away Because Everybody's gotta live And everybody's gonna die Everybody's gotta live Before you know the reason why Everybody's gotta live Before you know the reason why Yorki? Jojo! Oh God. Jojo! Oh, I've missed you! Sorry about your mama. I cried for ages, when I heard what happened. What's going on out here? The Russians, Jojo. They're coming. And the Americans from the other way. And England, and China. And Africa, and India. The whole world is coming. Help me with this ammo. And how are we doing? Terribly. Our only friends are the Japanese. And just between you and me, they don't look very Aryan. Remember that Jew, I told you about? - Oh yeah. - I still have her. She's, basically, my girlfriend now. Oh, good for you, Jojo. A girlfriend. But, you know, she is Jewish. There are bigger things to worry about than Jews, Jojo. There are Russians somewhere out there. They are worse than anyone. I heard they eat babies and have sex with dogs. I mean, like, that's bad, right? Sex with dogs? Yeah, the Englishmen do it too. We have to stop them before they eat us and screw all our dogs. It's crazy. And now Hitler's gone. We're really on our own. What? You didn't hear? He's dead. He gave up and blew his brains out. No! That's impossible. Blew them out. His brains. Turns out, he was hiding a lot of stuff from us. Doing some really bad things behind everyone's backs. I'm not sure if we'll survive attacks. Okay. Come here. Okay. See that American there? Just go give him a hug. Go! Run! Let's go! Oh, Yorki, Yorki. Great news, you've just been promoted and you get you own pistol. Just go and shoot anybody who looks different to us. Okay. Jojo, where's your uniform? Here, put this jacket on, so they know not to shoot you. We must kill everything that we see. Heil Hitler! Die, devil's tongue. Yeah, we'll check him. Hey! Hey! What? I don't understand. Captain K. Hiya, kid. Look at all this commotion. What's happening? Hysteria, my friend. We come to the end. Party's over. Are you scared? Don't be scared. Look at me. I'm sorry about Rosie, she was a good person. An actual good person. Okay? It's okay, kid. I've been meaning to tell you. I think your book is really great. I'm sorry for laughing at it. Very creative. Come here, let's take a look at you. You look good. You're okay, kid. Now, go home. Look after that sister of yours. Okay? Get away! Get away, Jew! Get away! What's going on? It's a Jew! Shut up! You know this Nazi? He... I don't know this dirty Jew. - Get away, Jew! - Shut your mouth, Nazi! - No! - Get out of here! Go home! - Leave him alone! - Go home! Get out of here! Go home! Jojo? Yorki! Thank God! I thought you were dead. No, it seems like I can never die. I'm gonna go home to see my mother. I need a cuddle. Nothing makes sense anymore. Yeah, it's, definitely not a good time to be a Nazi. Hey, so now the war is over, at least your girlfriend will be free. She can leave now. Is something wrong? I've got to go. - Okay. - Sorry. Hi, I'm home. What's going on out there? Out where? Outside, dummy. Jojo, what's going on? Is it safe to come out? Jojo, is it safe? Can I leave? No. You can't leave. Why? You have to stay here. Who won? With me. Jojo, who won? Who won the war? We did. Germany won the war. I'm sorry. Dear Elsa, I know it's hard for you at the moment. And I know you feel like giving up. But you have to carry on. Me and your good friend Jojo, have devised a plan for you to escape. So, please, listen to him. He's gonna help you to get out of there. And then you could come be with me in Paris. Don't worry about Jojo. He'll be okay. See you in Paris. Nathan. He's dead. Pardon? Nathan. He died last year. Tuberculosis. Well... That's weird. Who wrote these? Thank you, Jojo. You've been so good to me. Well... Thing is... I love you. I know you think of me as a younger brother, which is fine. And... You're too old anyway. But... Man, it's quite hot in here. I love you too. - As a younger brother? - Yes, as a younger brother. Look, me and fake Nathan have found a way for you to escape. Maybe, you can trust your younger brother? Maybe. Okay then. Get your things together. We're leaving. Jojo Betzler. Ten and a half years old. Today, just do what you can. Where, in a shit, do you think you're going? - Out. - Out? Oh no, you don't. Now, we gonna stay in here, and you gonna tell me exactly what's going on with you and that thing it the attic. That thing is a girl. You're in love with her, aren't you? Yes. - Admit it! - I just said yes. I knew it! It was never gonna work out. And you. No, she's too old for you. And you're ugly. No, she's gonna leave you, you that, don't you? So, here's what's gonna happen, you little shit. You gonna put this on, okay? You gonna forget about that disgusting Jewy cow up there. And you gonna come back to me, where you belong. All right? Put it on! And then, we gonna pretend none of this ever happened. You got it? Heil me? For old time sake? Heil me, little man. No. - Heil me. - No. Just a little heil. Please. Fuck off, Hitler! Come on. Oh, wait. Ready? Yeah. Is it dangerous out there? Extremely. We made it. Probably, deserved that. What do we do now? |
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