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Knock on Wood (1954)
This is Paris, on
a peaceful day in June. Paris, tranquil, serene, unaware that in a few short hours, she would be a victim of a plot that will shake the security of the free world. This is 26 Ru Di Orlan, where top military advisers to the North Atlantic Alliance, are in secret session discussing two guarded blueprints. Two blueprints which contain the intricate design of top secret " Lafayette X.V.27 " The most deadly weapon yet devised by man. Such a prize, would inevitably attempt the most sinister, the most ruthless of international spy ring. And at 10 o'clock that evening two of the most desperate of these rings are simultaneously at work, each unaware of the others operation. Employed by the first of this ring is a man known only as Brodnik. Brodnik, skillful, fanatic foreign agent, whose government will stop at nothing to achieve its sinister aim. Theft of the plans of deadly Lafayette X.V.27. The second ring is far more subtle in its operation. This ring is headed by Godfrey Langston, ostensibly a wealthy British philanthropist, actually a man whose loyalty is to any nation with the highest paycheck. But when ruthless and desperate men are at work, there are always the innocent who suffer. The case of the Lafayette X.V.27 is no exception. Well at that very moment, in a nearby nightclub, a young American ventriloquist just finishing his act, quite unaware that before midnight is to be involved in one of the most infamous crimes, in the history of international espionage. Thank you! Thank you very much! Thank you. Ladies and gentlemen, this is our last performance in Paris. And both Clarence and I would like to tell you how much we've grown to love you and your wonderful Paris. Speak for yourself, pal, I can't wait to get out of here! Don't mind Clarence folks, he's just jealous, because... one of the nicest thing that can happen to anybody in Paris happened to me. - I fell in love. - Love, ha, ha, ha. This dame will take him for every dime he's got! This is insulting. He should drop it from the act. I wish it was an act! Just jealous! Really folks, she's a beautiful, wonderful girl. I wish you could see her. Yeah, you should see her. A blonde, blue-eyed baby-faced purse snatcher. - Clarence! - A peroxide octopus! - Quiet! -15 hands and they're all in his pockets. - Clarence, please! - A 110 pounds of well stacked rattlesnake! - Clarence! - 62 and a half inches of... That's enough. Well goodnight folks. Bless you and goodnight. Audrey, wait a minute, honey. I'm terribly sorry. I promise it won't happen again. Jerry, I just can't take it any longer. It's getting worse all the time, and tonight the dummy was completely out of control. Look honey, you know I've been terribly upset. Why don't you try and be a little patient. I did try but it just doesn't work. We met, we fell in love and it was wonderful. Sure it was wonderful! The minute we talk about marriage, it all changed! This thing came to life. It turned into something evil. It's a monster, it's some sort of a witch. - It takes one to know one! - Clarence! Jerry, the ballet is leaving for England tonight and I'm going with them. Let's just say that this whole thing was a terrible mistake. But Audrey, wait a minute, I can explain all this. Jerry, look. You need help and you ought to see a doctor. - I don't need a doctor! - You have to straighten yourself out and then maybe one day we can get together and try again. Don't call us, we'll call you. Oh! Oh. - Goodbye Jerry! - Audrey! Now you, miserable, little monster! You've done it again! Good riddance. You weren't in love with her anyway. - That's none of your business! - She was taking you for a ride. - One more word out of you, Clarence. - Yes, I'll take the head! I'm warning you Clarence! Give a pushover to soft... Jerry! That's fine... twice in one week. I don't know what's wrong, Marty. The words keep coming out. I can't seem to control him anymore. I'm going to level with you. You're in trouble, Jerry. Big trouble. Now, I've done something about it and I don't want any argument. You're going to see a doctor, first thing in the morning. Well, maybe that the most sensible thing to do. I just don't know anymore, Marty. What kind of a doctor? Best in the business. His name is Kreuger. He's in Zurich. Switzerland? I've got hotel reservation, tickets on a midnight... Wait a minute. What is this midnight plane to Switzerland? What kind of a doctor is he? - I told you, the best. - Yeah, I know, the best. But what kind? Well, sort of a... psychiatrist. - A head shrinker? A weight picker? No, not for me, buddy. - Jerry, please. - Why don't you admit it. You think I... I've goofed my gums, I've blown my fuse. What you're inferring this much ain't you? Why do you suddenly want to take midnight plane to Switzerland? What's going to be in Switzerland? Well, I'm very happy here. I've got a little problem, that I'll work out. - You think that I've gone crazy... - Jerry, listen! Nobody says you're crazy. But, you're upset, you're disturbed. I've seen that happen five times. Now, you meet a girl, you like her, everything's fine. And when you get serious, this thing comes to live and breaks it up. Only it's getting worse. That's the second dummy you've broken this week. You've got to see Dr. Kreuger. Oh, Marty, that stuff takes 3 or 4 years. Kreuger's got a new technique. He's cured some people in a week. Now I'm a four year job, I just know it. - You open in London in 10 days. - I'll be alright in London! You will not be alright in London! Jerry, listen to me! I've been with you 10 years now. Like a brother. This is the end. If you're not with me on the plane tonight, and you know about me and planes. If you don't go and see Kreuger and straighten yourself out, so help me, I'm walking out. - Alright, I'll go. - Good. Now Kreuger will probably want to see you work with Clarence. What's the name of the guy who patches up the dummy? The fella who's fixing up Terence. - Papinek. - Papinek. I'll take Clarence, Jerry, you go to the hotel and pack. No, I'll take him over. Poor little guy. Now look, you've got to stop thinking about being as a person, it's just a hunk of wood. Don't you think I know that? Just a hunk of wood. - Let me take him. - I'll take him over. He'd liked it better this way. As Jerry Morgan leaves for the shop of Papinek, the wet-book circumstance tightens around him. For at that very moment, at 26 Ru Di Orlan, Brodnik, having gained access to the secret files, secures the 2 precious blueprints of Lafayette X.V.27. when... as Brodnik escapes into the night, the alarm goes out to the French police. The news finally reaching a high official, who is a guest at Godfrey Langston's party. Olivia. Excuse me, Monsieur. Cash, I'd call quickly, will you? Yes. Yes, I see. The authorities have sealed off the area. Get down there, find that man. Get hold of those plans before the police do. Papinek! Papinek! The police! - Shhh... goes the bell. I just managed to escape. - The plans. Have you got the plans? - I have them now. Their coming in the streets. Choppa choppa. Horsepower. - We must get them out of here at once. - How? You take them. Plane, train, they must leave Paris tonight. Impossible, I'm being watched. Paris will be sealed like a drum... Every airports, every railway station... Mr Papinek, are you almost finished? It's passed eleven. Just be patient, it will be ready in a minute. The ventriloquist. He leaves tonight for Zurich by midnight plane. Midnight plane... - Which one is his? - Both. We put one in each. - One in each? - Should anything go wrong, should one piece fall into the wrong hands, it's no good without the other. Good. Hurry. I sure hate to put you through all this trouble, Mr Papinek, but this is kind of an emergency. We're leaving for Zurich tonight. No, no, no. You mustn't touch. Wait until the glue dries. I'm sure it's a good one. - Yeah. Cos I'd hate you to think I keep breaking these dummies all the time. But the peculiar thing is, I keep breaking them only when I'm in love. At least Marty thinks it peculiar, that's why we are going to see this doctor in Switzerland tonight. - Remember, the glue! - Yeah. Mr Papinek, you are a Frenchman, and the French is supposed to know about these things... I'd like to ask you something. How can you tell when you're really in love? - Remember, you must not touch. - Not even if you're in love? Not until the glue hardens. Not until the glue harden? Well, thanks again. I'll send you some money from Switzerland. Now, go to your place, call Zurich, contact Gromek. Gromek? Why don't we call him from here? I'm sure my calls are being intercepted. Tell Gromek, when he gets the plans, I'll meet him in London. All right. Please. Hurry! Stop! I wish to contact... a Mr Laszlo Gromek. No, no. Gromek, G - R - O - M - E - K. Yes, yes, this is Gromek. Go on. The merchandise leaves tonight. Tonight? Go on... What's wrong with you? The twelve o'clock plane for Zurich. It is carried by the red-headed ventriloquist... Red-headed ventriloquist? Red-headed ventriloquist? Red-headed ventriloquist? Red-headed ventri... We have a lead, sir. An American ventriloquist, named Jerry Morgan, who does have red hair, holds an engagement tonight at "La Poule d'Or" He's got passage for Zurich on a midnight plane. - See that we are on that plane. - Yes, sir. - Good evening. - Good evening. Oh, please keep your coat, sir. Our heating system is temporarily out of order. Silliest thing I ever heard of. Fasten your seat belt, these midnight trips to Switzerland. Will you lay off, I'm the one who should be complaining. You know how I get. Well, stop complaining. You're not going to be sick. It's all mental. Just don't think about it. You'll be alright. - Oop, I'm terribly sorry. - Oh, that's quite alright. Passengers would you please take your seats. - Are you sure you got hotel reservations? - Only the best, the Zonenhof. - You get two rooms? - Two rooms. - Good. We had to sleep in the same room with that deviated septum of yours... Stop worrying, will you? - Do you feel all right? - I feel fine, fine... - How is your stomach? - Okay, just don't talk about it. We are taking off. Please make sure you have fastened your seat belt. Yeah, you better fasten your seat belt. Now forget your stomach. It's all mental... Oop! What are you doing? Nothing... I just fastened my belt. - Then, please, unfasten it. - Yes, ma'am. - It seems to be stuck. - Ring for the stewardess. - She'll be here in a minute, so... - Yes, I suppose so. - Lovely night, isn't it? - Yes, very nice. - Are you from Paris? - No. - London? - Yes. Enjoyed the coronation? Oh, would you please try to get us undone. - I'm terribly sorry. - It's quite alright. Marty, you sure you're alright? Please... I'll be fine. Perhaps you and your friend would like to sit together? Oh, that's very nice of you. You sure you wouldn't mind? No, not at all. Watch your head. Oh, you dropped... - Oh, I'm terribly sorry. - It's quite alright. The washroom is at the rear. Wasn't that awful? I spilled chocolate all over her coat. Well, I suppose it don't mean a thing, Marty. It's all in your mind. Dramamine clears it up right away. You know, I just read an article. It said in the article that... you'd never get airsick if you had something in your stomach. - Please, don't say stomach. - What did you have for dinner? I don't want to think about it. But, you should think about it. The article said you should think about it. It eases the tension, relaxes the stomach muscles... - Please, don't say stomach. - Marty, don't be a child. You've got to fight this thing. Now tell me, what did you have for dinner? Well, first I had a little chicken soup. Chicken soup. Well, chicken soup is wonderful. It's light, nourishing, warm, - going down. Settles the stomach. - Please, don't say stomach. - Well, what else did you have for dinner? - Lobster. Lobster? Good, good. Lobster, very good. High protein content, iodine. Very good indeed. - You have it boiled? No, thermidor.. - Oh, themidor. - With a thick cheese sauce. That's nice. Thick cheese sauce. Then some chicken tetrazzini, broccoli with hollandaise sauce and a chopped anchovy salad with Roquefort dressing. - Then for dessert... - No names, just initials. "Baked Alaska" with a rich, creamy, fluffy, sugary... All right. You know, you were right. My stomach feels much better. - Please, don't say stomach. - Don't you feel well? - I think I should like a different seat. - Front or rear? Oh, anywhere, just away from that particular young man. Thank you. I beg your pardon. Aren't you, Jerry Morgan? - Yes. - Well, I'm Godfrey Langston's secretary. Mr Langston is a great admirer of yours and consider it an extreme privilege to meet you. - Tell him, some other time. - Tell him Mr Morgan will be right over. Thank you! Why did you do that for? I'm in no mood to meet anybody. That's Godfrey Langston. One of biggest wheels in England. - Very social. If he likes you, you're in. - Good, maybe some other time. You can't pass this up. This might be the opportunity of a lifetime. Alright, okay. If I don't do it I'll never hear the end of it. Good. And when you meet him, don't play it too big, you know how the British are, very dignified, reserved. So throw everything away. - You know, nice and casual. - You know, this is pretty silly. Come on, kid, do it for me. Okay. - Mr Langston? - Yes. How nice of you Mr Morgan. - Won't you sit down? - Alright. Don't mind if I do. I must apologise for asking you over like this. - But, I am quite a fan of yours. - Oh, really? - Turkish or Egyptian? - Err, Egyptian I think. I have seen your act at "La Poule d'Or" a dozen times at least. I want to tell you that in your special field, I think your planning, your technique, your execution are not only daring but brilliant. Oh, it's routine stuff, really. In a way, it puts one in mind of the daring of another performance. A performance that took place tonight, at 26 Ru Di Orlan. Now you certainly do a lot of night clubbing, don't you? I'm afraid there's a theft of some top secret documents which are at this moment being transported out of the country - by some clever courier. - Oh? That performance also requires a certain daring and brilliance. For all we know, he may be on a ship from Bordeaux, a train to Berlin or even on this very plane. The chap's have to travel somewhere, I imagine. Imagine the anxiety of such a man, the tension he must be feeling in the pit of his stomach. I mean, if anyone knew who he was or what he was carrying his life wouldn't be worth a moments purchase. In certain circumstances, you'd imagine he'd be prepared to change his hazardous position for one of a luxury, security, and what's more important, safety. - Don't you agree with me? - Um, yes, err. In other words, you will think that he'd be prepared to enter into a negotiation if the price were right? Oh, he'd be a fool, not to. I'm so glad you agreed with me, Mr Morgan. Tell me, Mr Morgan, how many stars, would you say, there were out there? Well... - Stars... in the sky, stars? - Yes. Well... I don't know... Off hand, I would say way of in the thousands... - A 100 thousand. - I think more than that. -200 thousand? - No, possibly a little bit more. 300 thousand. I don't like to seem impertinent, Mr Langston but that's the Milky Way. Very well, Mr Morgan, how many would you say there were? Stars? Well, I'd say about a million. - A million? - Yeah... about... Very well Mr Morgan, let us say a million. Very well, Mr Langston, let's. - Good. Shall we say, lunch tomorrow, at my hotel? Yes, that would be very nice. Noon, my suite, the Zonenhof. - Oh, that's where I'm staying. - Oh, what a coincidence. Well, it's been fun Mr Langston, the stars and everything and I'll see you tomorrow. - Oop! Oh, I'm terribly sorry. - It's quite alright. - Oh, I'm terribly sorry. - Gromek. That's okay. Are you positive we got two rooms? - Of course. - Okay. - Oh mister, you dropped something. - Gromek. You're welcome. - Cigarette? - No, no thanks. - I insist. - Okay, if you insist, I'll be happy to. Say, these are pretty mild, you know? Well, Gromek very much. You know, this is an easy language to pick up. But you can't put us both in the same room, I won't sleep. This man snores. I'm sorry Herr Morgan, but we're overcrowded. For tonight there are no other room. - But I distinctly told the man 2 rooms! - I am very sorry. Well, I know you're sorry, but listen to me for one minute, my friend. When this man snores, it's like nothing human, it's like it comes out of a machine or something. I'm sorry. I know you're sorry, but it isn't his fault. He's got a deviated septum, and every time the cold air hits his nose, it make the most awful... What seems to be the trouble? Oh, we've only got one room, and my associate snores. This young man is a particular friend of mine. I'd appreciate if you would accommodate them both. Yes, Mr Langston. - Goodnight Mr Morgan. - Goodnight Mr Langston, see you tomorrow. - Noon, my suite. - Yes, capital. Ah, yes! I find you can have two adjoining rooms. However, it's the old wing, there are no private baths. Oh, that's quite alright my good man. Mr Brown will be in 311, and you will be in 312. - Gromek! - No, Gromek is in 418 Easy language to pick up. My key, please. You know Jerry, you better take this pill and get a good night's sleep. Oh well, you know how I hate to take these things, Marty. They always make me so groggy. You've got to be clear-headed when you see the doctor in the morning. Now come on, get under the covers and get some rest. Nice and warm. - Marty? - Yeah. You don't think the doctor is going to find out I'm crazy or anything, do you? Of course not. - Now put your cigarette out, Jerry. - I don't think I'm crazy. I think I'm a little peculiar but that's not crazy. Well that's about all, now. I want you to get a good night's rest. A lot of people are peculiar but they are not crazy. A lot of people are peculiar. Of course I won't admit that I'm high strung and nervous, and irritable, sometimes I'm a little over-talking but that certainly isn't crazy. It's just peculiar. - I'm high strung. - I know that you're peculiar too. But you're not crazy. Nobody says you're crazy. You won't be put away simply because people said that you were peculiar. I mean, nobody is going to put anybody away. I want you to go... In my business people have to be tough it isn't high school... but it's certainly not... - Go to sleep! - Look, I know one thing, I know crazy is crazy and peculiar is peculiar. - Are you through? - Yeah. Good night. Marty? Yeah? Suppose after we've gone all this trouble, the doctor finds out there's absolutely nothing wrong with me. That would be very peculiar. Goodnight. - Yeah? - Did you wish to be called in the morning? - Yes, at 8 o'clock, please. - Very well. - Yes? - Would you like also your breakfast sent up? Oh yeah. I'd like some orange juice, and just toast and coffee, I guess. - Very well. - Okay. What is it? - When? When? When do you suppose? First thing in the morning. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to get some sleep. Very well. Snoring is better than this. I'll go and sleep with Marty. What are you doing here? Where's Martha? - Marty? This is strictly a business trip, and he knows it. Now where is he? Young man, I don't know who you are or how you got here, but if you're not out of my room in exactly one minute, I shall call the authorities. Your room? I'm terribly sorry. This is a dreadful mistake, I... You see, I took a sleeping pill last night. I thought I was walking into Marty's room. I had no idea I was coming into this room. I don't usually walk into Marty's room either because he snores, he has a deviated septum and makes the most awful racket, but the radiator started go... Anything is better than sleeping with the radiator so I thought I'd go into Marty's deviated... I had to be up early because I have got to be at Dr Kreuger's clinic, I mean Dr. Clinic's Kreuger... Well, it's been a very pleasant evening. I do hope I'll see you again. - If you don't mind. My slippers... - Slippers? Well, thanks again. ... Er, pillow. Thank you. It's been wonderful. Come on if you're going to take a shower, you got 45 minutes to get over to Kreuger's. Marty, the strangest thing happened. I got up in the wrong room this morning. You got a good night's sleep? I don't know how I got there. I can't figure it out. You'll feel better after you take your shower. Now pick up a hotel robe. It's in the closet. The washroom is down the hall. Now come on, hurry. I don't want to miss my breakfast. - What are you doing here? - Where's Marty? Who is Marty? Listen, if this keeps up you'll get us kicked out of Switzerland. Young man, you are in the ladies shower room. I don't... Ladies shower room? Holy... Ladies... If you're not out of here in exactly 3 seconds... Oh, I'm terribly sorry, this is a dreadful mistake, really... I could explain all this but it would take too much time. You see, I've got to be at Dr. Clinic's Kreuger. I mean, Dr Kreuger's clinic. Like I told you before, Marty has this nose trouble... - You see one of his nostril... - I know, deviated septum. - Oh, do you suffer over that too? - Just get out! Yes. I hate to bathe and run like this but... Like I told you I... - If you don't mind, my slippers... Slippers? Oh, slippers! I'm sorry. I could explain this, but you'd never believe it. Where is it? The third door on the right, but lock the door, they'll walk right in on you. - Don't you understand? I'm Gromek. - Hmm? - Gromek. G -R -O- M -E- K. - Oh, that spells Gromek, all right. Maybe this will help. - I'm a friend of Brodnik. - Hmm? Brodnik, B - R - O - D - N - I- K. No, that doesn't help, but you sure can spell. Philips ask to mention the name, Maurice Papinek? Oh, Papinek! Oh sure. Are you a friend of Papinek? - I am to contact you. - You are? Oh, of course, about the glue. Well tell him it turned out just fine. Turned out fine? Yeah, I broke the head of my dummy last night, and he fixed it. He did a beautiful job. Oh, I see. - I'm sorry to have troubled you. - Oh, it's no trouble at all. Oh, and by the way when you see Papinek, give him my regards, and tell him Gromek. Gromek ever so much. Gromek ever so much. Gromek ever so much? Good morning. - I have a report from Paris. - Well? Morgan seems to be on the verge of some sort of breakdown, and he came here for treatment. Last night he broke his dummy, and have it repaired at the shop of a man named... Papinek. Papinek! Papinek... that name. Well, of course... Maurice Papinek the Perini ring. Oh, how foolish of me. Brodnik must have brought the plans to Papinek, and there's where they stuck them into the dummy. The red-headed fool is nothing but a mailbox. They just took the dummy from the hotel. Now let me know the moment they get back. We got to get hold of that dummy at the first opportunity. Very well. Well, that's pretty much the story, Dr Kreuger. It's happen the same way now, five times. - I see. - I meet a girl, fall in love with her. When I begin to think of marriage, Clarence suddenly comes alive and breaks it up. You're quite sure you wouldn't like to see me work with him? No, that won't be necessary. And I have a practical suggestion. A psycho-analyst who practices in London, and entirely familiar with my technique, is here on consultation. Now since you must perform in England in 10 days, I'd like this doctor to observe this session, and continue to treat you in London. - Oh, that's fine, doc. Sure. - Please have Dr Nordstrom come in. I'm sure this will help us achieve a short treatment, and a rapid recovery. Come in! Well, hello! Good morning. Well, this is quite a surprise, I didn't expect to see you here. - You two know each other? - No, not really. We slept in the same room last night. I mean... we took a shower together Actually, we've never been introduced. This may take a little longer than I thought. We are... - I'm sorry. Our path crossed quite accidentally, Dr Kreuger. Yes. - It was a normal mistake. - Oh, quite normal, you see. This radiator was going... and my friend who has this deviated septum. Oh, she has the same trouble. Well, he gave me the sleeping pill because he couldn't... - Prepare the injection. - Yes doctor. - Prepare the injection? - Yes. Give me your coat, please, and lie down. This was quite a normal mistake, I don't think we need any injection for this. - What kind of sort of an injection...? - Lie down and roll up your shirt. - What kind of an injection is this? - A simple painless injection Mr Morgan. You will have a deep sleep and talk freely. I talk pretty freely, anyway. I guess you've found that out by now. Your sleeve, please. Dr Nordstrom, I'd like to explain about this morning. I'm really not in the habit of taking showers with strange women. - Or even those I know very well. - Please! But I want to assure you, doctor, that if I had to take a shower with someone, there's no one in the world I would rather... You'd better give me that shot. Deep breath. Gosh, I just can't get over you being a doctor. I mean, you're so... pretty for a doctor. - No offense, Dr Kreuger. - Relax Mr Morgan. Gosh, I don't think of a doctor as having such beautiful blue eyes, such lovely hair, this pretty lips... You know, if I wouldn't... You're beautiful... You're asleep now. We're going back, far back into the past. Years are falling away. And you're now a little boy. Yes, I'm a little boy. I'm a very little boy. I'm a little boy. I'm five years old and everybody says I am cute and smart and bright. But actually I'm the most unhappiest, loneliest, most miserablest little boy in the whole world. Tell me, Jerry, why are you so unhappy? Because my mummy and daddy are always fighting and yelling and screaming at each other, - and throwing things and everything. - And why do they do that? They have to. They are married. - You think that all married people fight? - Yes, I do and I don't like it. I don't like it one bit. I hate it, that's what I do. I just hate it. Then I'm going to run away from home. I'm going to go to China and Africa, and I'm going to hunt tigers and lions and I'm going to climb mountains. - Why don't you? - I'm not allowed to cross the street. Tell me, Jerry, what do your mummy and daddy do for a living? Well the have Vaudeville act, but they're always yelling and fighting and screaming at each other. Why do they fight? Because mummy says that daddy is always looking at Zelda, the fire eater and then, - of course there's his drinking. - I mean, just how bad is that? I don't know, but mummy says that if you can buy it, burn it or bottle it, if he could sip it, swallow it or gurgle it or gargle it if you could squeeze it out of the bottle or squeeze it out of a damp rag or just put it in a glass and swish it around he'll drink it. But, Jerry, isn't there anything about your life, that's pleasant or happy? Yes. Yes there is. When my mummy and daddy go on the stage, it's just beautiful. All the colored lights go on, and the music is playing. It's the most wonderful thing. - Hi Zelda. - Hi dear. Hey, how do you like the new spaghetti joint? Why don't you stick to your characting, kid. You're out of your class. - Come on, move along! - What's the matter with you, big mouth. I didn't say anything. There's a big difference between staring and watching? - Hell, how was I in love with her? - That's what you were thinking... Mummy, daddy, stop, stop, stop... Mummy, daddy, stop it. Stop it, mummy, daddy, stop it... Relax Jerry, please. You're alright. You're with friends. What's your opinion, doctor? It seems a rather standard case. Lonely child, product of a unhappy home life, grows up with a strong resistance to marriage. Precisely. And being a ventriloquist, he uniquely expresses his resistance through the dummy. He needs concentrated therapy. I suggest we both leave for London immediately. Good. But remember, he must have absolutely no contact with the dummy. Doctor, there's just one thing. The young man has already indicated some sort of an attraction to me. Do you think this would endanger the treatment? Well, I think that's a risk we'll just have to take. Jerry... Jerry, you can wake up now. - Beautiful blue eyes, lovely hair... - You can wake up now. We are going to London. We are? That's nice. This is very nice of you, Mr Langston. To go out of your way and give us a lift like this. That is not out of my way at all. As I explained to you, I had an emergency call from London. So I had to charter this plane anyway. - Well, I still think it's pretty nice. - It's my pleasure. And I hope when you get to London, you'll come down to Langsmeyer, and visit me. Oh, I'd like to. I have many friends who'd enjoy your company. Perhaps you let me give you cards to all my clubs. Cards to your clubs? Oh, that's very generous. How am I ever gonna repay you for this? Don't mention it, my dear boy. This sort of thing carries its own reward. Now, if you, two young people will excuse me, I think I'll go and get a bit of a nap. - Perhaps you'd like a tea or sandwiches? - No, thanks. Maybe a little later on. Isn't he a wonderful man? He's so kind and fatherly. It's terribly important to you, isn't it? Yeah. I wonder why? Could it be that Godfrey Langston seems strong, dependable, everything that little Jerry Morgan longed for and never had in the father? Do you know, doctor, you're awfully smart? This dependence of feelings could be one of your basic problems. Doctor, what are doing for dinner tonight? Mr Morgan, let me caution you, from the outset that our relationship must be completely and strictly impersonal. Is that clear? Oh, yes, yes. And, there is another thing we'd have to guard against. You see, in almost every therapy the patient becomes emotionally involved with his analyst. It can take various forms, of course. But, as I am a woman and you are a man, it's quite possible, that during the course of our work you will even get the notion that you're in love with me. You know, it's amazing how fast this stuff works. And so the case of Lafayette X.V.27 moves to England. where, that night, at Langsmeyer, his country estate, Godfrey Langston, confident that he possesses the complete plans, starts negotiations for their sale, to a man in Istanbul. A man known only as Brutchik. Tell Brutchik we have plans. He's flying here at once. He'll wire the time of arrival. Excellent. Meanwhile, at the Royalton, a nondescript hotel in the Soho district, Gromek, confident that he too has the complete plans, has contacted Maurice Papinek in Paris. Papinek, delayed by police surveillance assures Gromek that will arrive in London within 24 hours. Later that evening, at the Kensington Park Hotel, Marty wasted no time, setting up a conference with the British press. " American ventriloquist arrives from Paris. ". Two dummies. Lucky we picked the right one. Thank you. "Always yours, darling: Richard" - Good morning, Mr Morgan. - Good morning. I brought you a few little posies. Oh, thank you. But I make it a practice not to accept gifts from my patients. If you don't mind, I'll give it to the children at the clinic in which I work. No, I don't mind at all. - If you'll just sit down and relax. - Over there? - Yes, please, if you don't mind. - No, I like sitting here, I think. Very briefly, our technique is this. I want you to say anything that comes into your mind, and I'll take notes of the pertinent facts. - So shall we start? - Yeah. - Anything that comes into my mind? - Yes, please. - Who is Richard? - Pardon? - Who's the fella in the picture? - Oh, just a friend of mine. - American, isn't he? - He was. What do you mean "was"? Is he dead? Mr Morgan, I cautioned you yesterday, didn't I? Oh yeah, I forgot, I'm sorry. I apologise. Very well. Let's proceed. I was born in Philadelphia, right in the middle of a matinee. Then my family moved on to... Were you in love with him? If that picture distracts you, I'll remove it. No, no, no. It doesn't distract me. I mean... I don't know even know the man. Why should it... it doesn't distract me. Probably somebody was just in love with it or something... Were you in love with him? Quite obviously we can't proceed until your curiosity is satisfied. His name was Richard Thompson. He was a pilot in the American air force. I was a nurse. We met. We fell in love. During the invasion, he was killed. - That's a shame. - I always wanted to become a doctor. I became a doctor and then an analyst. And that's all. Now, may we proceed, please, Mr Morgan? Yeah. After we left Philadelphia we went... That's all? That's all you've done? Just been a doctor and nothing else? - I beg your pardon? - I mean, haven't you any social life of romance, or dates or gone out with men or people or anything? - Really, Mr Morgan! - Oh doctor, you're in a lot of trouble. We gonna have to do something about it. I'm afraid we made a dreadful mistake. Now, wait a minute! I'll see that you get a competent male analyst. I don't want a competent male analyst, I am very happy with you. But you're stubborn and refuse to cooperate! That's not true. You told me to say anything that came into my mind. - Yes. - Alright, I mentioned Richard. What if I did? Suppose I had a horse once named Richard, and he kicked me in the head or something. That's quite possible. You know what I think? I think that if can't mention Richard, it doesn't necessarily mean that there's something wrong with me, it might mean there's something wrong with you. And you ought to do something about it right away. - I'll call Dr Manfred. - I don't want Dr Manfred, I want you. I mean, I need a young and beautiful doctor and you're just what the doctor ordered, doc. - I've had quite enough of this Mr Morgan. - Now, let's face the facts. When is the last time a man held you in his arms? When is last time a man told you, you were young and beautiful? - And you are young and beautiful. - Mr Morgan, would you please go? No, not until I finish what I've got to say. What are you fighting? What are you so dreadfully afraid of? I find it absolutely impossible to work with you, Mr Morgan. - So would you please go. - Alright, I'll go. But there's a darn side more wrong with you than there is with me and I'll prove it to you. - If you don't mind, my umbrella, please. - Oop, sorry. " Sigmund Freud" "Introduction to Psychoanalysis. ". Possessively approaches and hidden in the unconscious and... Oh good morning. I'd like to see Dr Nordstrom please. I'm sorry. This is the doctor's day at the clinic. Oh, well I'm sure it will only take a few minutes. Oh good morning, doctor. I haven't reach Dr Manfred yet, but I will. So will you excuse me. Oh, you don't have to reach Dr Manfred. I have been up all night studying your problem, and I think I've got the answer. It's very common, it's in all the books. All you've got is a little "guilt complex" that's all. You see, you are a victim obsessive reproaches, and obsessive reproaches are hidden in the unconscious mind. Do you understand? As Heinrich Lastvogel said... Wait a minute! Don't you understand? You are regressive. And regression is a defense mechanism used against guilt feelings rationalized again and again for distorted use of the gratification of the Oedipus. Listen to me, for just one minute, please. Look, forget all those big words. I don't know what they mean anyway. But I do know this. I know that you loved Richard and Richard loved you. And when he died, you felt kind of guilty because it was him instead of you. Don't you understand? You're blaming yourself for something that isn't your fault. It's like punishing yourself because you didn't die too. Don't you see that? It's true, isn't it? I just didn't think it showed. Maybe you will feel better if you talk about it. - No, I'm... - Oh, please. - I don't... - It sometimes helps. Just talk. This is where it all happened. The town where Richard was stationed, and hospital where I was a nurse. I come here every week, work at the clinic, visit his grave... Why don't you keep talking? Just received a wire, sir. Mr Brutchik has left Istanbul. He arrives tonight. - Are you sure you won't have a drink? - Oh, no, no. You know what's the funny thing about me and drinking. All I have to do is smell the cork, I fall flat on my face... Now do you suppose your father's drinking has anything to do with the...? This is your patient not mine, remember? - Would you like to dance? - You may be sorry. I'll probably be all feet. And with the rest of you, makes it so worthwhile. Come on. I never dreamed, but I've been dreaming lately, all about you, Whatever I do, My thoughts are, all about you, You're so caressable, sweet and blessable, so unguessable too that I'm in a spin because of inaccessible you, What will I do? The friends I call, that I've been calling lately. I call about you, And not just a few, I want to tell them, all about you. Is it unbelievable or conceivable, you care at all about me. Do you want my arms as I do all about you. Is it unbelievable or conceivable, you care at all about me. Do you want my arms as I do, all about you. Well Mr Brutchik, what do you think? Very good, very good. Now show me the second half. The second half? This is only the primary mechanism. There's a triggering device? - There's a second blueprint? - Second blueprint? Two halves? Why of course, that picture in the paper. The two dummies. If this is some sort of a game? Telephone London. Tell our friends to go to Morgans Hotel immediately, and get that blueprint from the other dummy. And I don't care how. Yes, sir. Don't worry, we'll get the other half. Contact me when you do. - Oh, it was a really wonderful day. - Wasn't it, doc? - I can't remember having a nicer time. - No? Oh, it was very kind of you making me do all those things, - I haven't done for years. - I couldn't be more pleased. Do you suppose I could come back tomorrow, as a patient, I mean? - I don't see why not? - Good. - Well... - Yes? - Goodnight. - Goodnight. What time is my appointment? I'll be early. You go to Morgans Hotel now, tonight, and get the other plan. And nothing will stop you. - When do I get paid? - You will go now. - Not till I get my money. - You will go now, or you will have very little use for money. - Good evening, sir. - Sure is! Hello. Where have you been all day? Not a call, not a word. I've been worried sick. Boy, have I got news for you. I have got great news for you. I'm in love, Marty, really in love. What? Yeah, with the most beautiful doctor in the world. - Now don't start that again. You're... - No, this time it's different. - It's always different. - But this is, Marty, honestly, it is. I can't stop it, you can't stop it, she can't stop it. I'll tell you something. Not even Clarence can stop it. Clarence? Yeah, I'll get him out and prove it to you. Jerry, you can't do that. You're in no shape to go near that dummy. Now listen, I'm not dressed. Will you please come down here and talk to me? Just talk to me before you do something silly. Alright, you're still a nervous wreck, but I'll come around and see you. It's quite obvious you won't find what you're looking for, because we have it. Just as it's quite obvious that you have what we're looking for. Get up! Where is the blueprint? Where is it? Where is it? You will pay? You'll be well taken care of. Where is it? - Papinek. - Where? - Royalton Hotel, room 314. - How do I know? - Here... key. - Key proves nothing. Get him on the phone. Please get the Royalton hotel. Yes, thank you. What do I say? Tell him you have the blueprint and we'll be right over. Royalton Hotel? Please, get me room 314. - Hello? - Hello... Papinek? - Yes. - Gromek. I have it. I come now. Walk! Walk! Open it! Clarence! Terence! U... mm... murder. Murder! Hello? There has been a murder, would you send the police up here,... body... Help! Uh... murder! Help police, somebody... Murder! Police...! don't go away... Police, murder, help! Murder, police, police, help! There has been a murder in my room! Send for the police! Help! Murder, here, murder! Police, help! ...and then I opened the closet and there was this fella stuck on my door. - Marty! - Jerry, what have you done? What have I done? You don't think for one minute I had... Listen to me, I told you not to go near... - Marty, don't you believe me? - All right, man, just give me the knife. What's the matter, you all gone crazy or something? I tell you I came in here, I opened the closet, and there was this character stuck up on it like a big piece of shashlik - a great big piece of shashlik. - Just give us the knife. And then I looked down, and there was Clarence and Terence, so badly slashed I couldn't tell Terence from Clarence - or Clarence from Terence! - Alright laddie, the knife. - You don't believe me, do you? - Of course I believe you! You do not. I know what you're thinking. Go on, say it. I'm a killer! I knife people all the time. Sure I've got buddies all over, haven't I? Why don't you look around, What about the body under the bed, or the one in the bathroom, or this one in here! I didn't do it! "Welcome Sons of Hibernia" ( Hibernia = Latin name for Ireland ). - Well, what did he do? - What did he do? - Oh, you mean Monahan? - How did he fight his way out? Fight... well... - What did he say? - Right in the face! - Oh! Oh, figure it out. You mean when Molly fell into the whiskey tank? How did he save her from drowning? - He figured it out! - Right! - That's a charming voice you have. - Thank you. That's a jolly note you got to your voice me boy. What did you say your name was? Well, I didn't say exactly. Patrick Michael Carmedi, junior. Would that be the Patrick Michael Carmedi Junior or Patrick Michael Carmedi Senior? - Oh, why wouldn't they know! - Gentlemen, this is Carmedi boy! This calls for a drink in memory of his dear departed father. Come on me lad, we must drink to your dear departed father, the past President of this organization. And one of the plentiest drinking when we ever had. Set him up, double. Well now, when it comes to drinking, gentlemen, really, I'm not like my father. Now, now no modesty. We've heard all about you. - You heard? - Like father, like son. What kind of a drink is that should be given a Carmedi boy? - No, no, way I finish this thing! - Here you are, relax. - To your dear departed father. - For my dear departed father. - Bottoms up. - Bottom up. As fine and decent a man has ever graced the good green south of the blessed... hill - Him self! - Him self! Ah, good companion, a fine father and a loving husband! - Ah, him self! - Him self! A man who is trustworthy alive, friendly, courteous, kindest, and cheerful, obedient, clean, reverent. Bottoms up. I finished it! Of course you did, you're Carmedi's boy! I know, it's funny, I usually take one drink, and I go... Ah, the poor boy! Strong lungs but a weak stomach. We can't let the poor lad lay on the floor, we'll take him to his lodge. - Alright, look for his key. - Oh, that I will. Here it is. Royalton Hotel, room 314. That's just down the street. - Come on now. Well, come along lad, we'll take you there. He was kind, courteous, always obedient, cheerful, frisky, pleasant and... Hello. It's noon sir. Would you like your brunch sent up? Ahh? Oh yeah... Royalton? Well, would you get me, Strand 4110 please? Hello? Oh, Jerry... Yes... yes I can go. - Are you alright? - I don't remember very much. I need you very bad. I think I'm in desperate trouble. There was murder last night, I didn't do them. - I know you didn't. - Where is he? - You believe me, don't you? - Yes, of course I believe you. Tell me, Jerry, where are you? I'm in Room 314 at the Royalton Hotel. Darling, I've got to see you. Would you please come right over. You just stay there. I'll come right over. Royalton Hotel. Room 314. - You'd better come along with us doctor. - Yes. - Who is there? - Your brunch sir. Just a minute. Good afternoon sir. Your brunch. Er, just nicked myself shaving. Oh, you ain't the only one who's cut up sir. Take a look at this. I'll get the table out. Papinek! The Ripper! The Red Headed Ripper! No... no... I'm good. Wait. - Help! Murder! - I am not a murderer. Help! Police! " Langleys "... Langleys, Langston! Got to get on to Langstons! Sorry. Mustn't miss my bus. It's the Ripper! Sorry. Oop! I'm terribly sorry. Oh, I'm terribly sorry. - How do you do? - How do you do? Could I be of assistance? Possibly, I don't think so at the moment. I'm just merely looking around. - But, devilish look familiar... - Oh, really? - Hey, have we met? - I don't think so, old man, I... I haven't been here, actually. I have been abroad, you see. At Prevaling, Foreign Office Indra, that sort of thing, really. Ah, India... yes. Did mountain climbing there, it's rather good fun this time of the year. Snow covered slopes, antelope tracks, sheeing and zorted good sport, you know. - What do you think of the Himalayas? - I beg your pardon? I said, what do you think of the Himalayas? Loved him, hated her. Was there any particular model you had in mind? I don't know, actually... possibly 4 wheel, perhaps an engine or some sort things you see... Maybe you're interested in this one of our most popular models, The custom built sports vehicle. Automatic transmission, deluxe 5 side walls, high compression, overhead valves, extremely low petrol consumption, 4 wheel hydraulic pepper touch brakes, single sheet glare-proof windscreen, - and conservatively priced at 1750 pounds. - I say that is rather conservative... Could you tell me, what that red thing, sitting out there, so attractive? That's our super automatic demonstrator. Demonstrator? Do you suppose we could go out for a bit of a spin? Unfortunately, can't leave the floor, huh? - Oh, pity. Do you care to take it out yourself? I'd be delighted to. If you just give me the keys, I should be most happy. - I'll be back quickly. - Let me explain about starting this... No need at all. It isn't necessary. You see I'm absolutely wizard with no help. The governor would know that I'm mechanical... - That's you, huh - Not at all. Goodbye. - Cheerio. - Ever so tall. Aw, there you are! Exactly how to find a salesman here. - I say, are you free? - No, you see, I'm a... Yes, as a matter of fact. Anything I can show you, sir? Well, I am terribly interested in the new "Superb". Is it as automatic as they say? Oh, good heavens, yes. It's one of the most automatic automatics we have in all the automatics here. - This is a two-seater? - Two seater? Yes... Well I'm rather tall you know and I try to have the seat set back. Well our seats set are back at lovelier at the moment. And for the moment our seat sets are back to arrives back yard, they'll have them set your seat for you... back. Well, I'm not awfully keen on this color, - but I saw one out there. - But we do have its own demonstrator. Red? Yes. Perhaps that color would suits you better. You will just come along with me. I should be most happy to explain it to you. Oh, yes. It's very nice. Very nice lines. Oh, there is a very interesting feature here I must show you. Oh, what is it? Well, it's our overhead underslung isolating compression decraminator. - What does it decraminate? - The Degasca chamber. Curious, it looks just like the hubcap. What does it matter effect it is except when you're decraminating of course, which only during low gears out in the open road. What? - It has everything, hasn't it? - Hasn't it, and... - I say, shall we get cracking? - Good idea. - Yes. Here we are. I could just find the ignition here... and Ignition here... well... yes, here... - Which is the ignition? - It was here a moment ago... Oh you see, this is one of our very special feature... Oh you know, super concealed. Prevent stealing. Occasionally, prevents driving. Ha, ha, this is one of the witty one. Oh yes, here we are. You put it in here exactly, and here we go. Oh, I see. It's the wrong button. Oh, terribly sorry. - Decraminating quite a bit, isn't it. - Yes. I thought perhaps, you'd like to see it all at once. Thank you, but... some another time. - Thank you. - Yes... Get me the police! - Thank you. Morgan has stolen a car. - A car? Do you have any idea where he might be heading? No. No, he doesn't know anybody in London but myself and Marty and... You don't suppose he's gone to see Mr Langston? - Who? - Godfrey Langston. He was friend to Jerry in Switzerland. - Jerry was terribly impressed. - I see. Get me Godfrey Langston. Very well, we'll be on the lookout. Thank you, Inspector. That idiot, Morgan may be a little toothache. If he turns up, hold him and inform the police. - Mr Brutchik has arrived, sir. - Oh, good. Hello, I'm Jerry Morgan. You wait a minute, I'm a friend of Mr Langston! - He's going to give me cards to his clubs. - Call the police! Let's get this over with as quickly as possible. I trust you're not wasting my time. I cannot understand why it's taken so long. You realize, my dear, Brutchik, this is no ordinary case of espionage. You have the plans? Please, be seated. - This is not a trick, you are sure? - Study them yourself. You will find, you are now in complete possession of Lafayette X.V.27. Two simple blueprints which hold the greatest power of annihilation the world has ever known. Ah yes, excellent! No question about these being the complete plans. Very good. Very good, indeed. Whoever controls this weapon, may well control the world. What are you trying to say? I'm suggesting a renegotiation of our agreement. - What do you mean, renegotiation? - Just that. - Renegotiation of the money. - I'm sorry. - Brutchik, you realize...? - You realize this, I'm about at the end of patience. We have made a commitment. Arm and generous commitment. I've lived up to my end of the bargain, and expect you to do likewise. You realize that we run more risks than planned. That's entirely your affair my dear Langston. You made the dealing. What do you mean more risk than planned? - Four men have had to be killed. - Four men! - Brodnik, Gromek, Papinek. - And Shaslik! Oh... Hello. - Morgan's here, somewhere in the house - Yes, I know. Take him. Take your hands off me! - How convenient Mr Morgan. - Don't you sweet talk me. You are a murderer, that's all! A spy, a traitor and murderer! And I'll tell you something else. You don't have to send me cards to your clubs. - I don't want them now. - Have you notified the police? I'm afraid we'll have to dispose of this young man before they arrive. Quickly and not too much of a mess. Make it look like self-defense. What's the matter, did you run out of knives? I'm sorry about this, old man. I rather liked you. Yeah, I'll bet you did. I shan't haggle. Take this and go. The plane for Istanbul leaves at 11 o'clock. 11 o'clock plane to Istanbul, eh? It's lucky we got here in time. Put up your hands! You are all under arrest! Fool around with Scotland Yard, will you? All right you spies, unhand that man! Run quickly after him! Quick! After him! He mustn't reach London alive! Thank you. He's escaped from Langston after making an attempt on his life. I just can't believe them. An all points report: Morgan's headed towards London. I want him taken, alive if possible, but take no chances. Repeat: Take no chances. Hello, nice to see you again. - Nice looking chap. I wonder who he is? - I'll ask him next time, Sue. Audrey. - Where can I find Miss Greene? - Who? You'll find her upstairs. Dressing room number 3. Okay. Thanks. - Audrey. - Oh, no! Audrey, you've got to help me. Don't you come near me! Don't believe the papers. I am innocent, Audrey. You've got to call the police. - Sure Jerry. Anything. - There's a man called Brutchik. He's going to blow up the whole world. Don't you understand that? Now look, they won't believe me but they will believe you. You... you've got to go to the police and tell them to stop the 11 o'clock plane to Istanbul, do you understand? - The man's name is Brutchik. - Oh, Brutchik. - Now hurry up, Audrey. - Now, you stay right here and don't you move. Istanbul. Brutchik is the man's name. Murray, would you hurry up! Why you always the last one? All right, all right. Get over here as fast as you can. He's stark raving mad. Yes, Jeffrey's in my dressing room. Oh, you take that side, and I'll cover this. Come on Boris, hurry up. Take me, I'm innocent! I know that you're making a terrible mistake. You should stop Brutchik. He's on the 11 o'clock plane to Istanbul. Oh darling, you should have believed me. But I do, Jerry. I do. They don't understand? Don't you understand. Brutchik is on the plane to Istanbul. He'll blow up the whole world! - Go on Medical, get some brandy. - I am not hysterical. Morgan, are you ready to make a confession? Look, I'll tell you everything, if you'll just listen to me. - Stenographer! - I'll take it down. It's all so simple, anybody could understand it. There was Brodnik and Gromek, and Shaslik and Brutchik. Now Gromek got it from Brodnik who brought it to Shaslik who in turn gave it to Brutchik. You see, the stuff was in Clarence, but it was also in Terence. Now they didn't know Clarence from Terence, or Terence from Clarence, so Gromek killed Shaslik. Have you got that, Gromek? G - R - O - M - E - K. Gromek killed first Shaslik. The second Shaslik got Papinek. - Papinek? - Yeah. - Maurice Papinek? - Yes, but he's not important. He's not the brains. That's him! That's the spy! Wilton, I want it clearly understood that this boy's interests are to be protected. - He is a personal friend of mine. - My friend, he tried to kill me! - He should have the best medical care. - Don't believe him. - My personal attorney. - He's a traitor. - I will underwrite the whole of his... - He can put you to those plans, I was telling you about. Two pieces of blueprint with that fancy French name. You can see the poor boy's out of his mind. Really you can't put any credence in the ravings of this maniac? I mean, you can't possibly think that I'll be involved in anything as infamous as the theft of the "Lafayette" papers? How did you know the name of the secret document? What? Well, this poor idiot just mentioned it. I beg your pardon. He didn't. What he said was "He gave Brutchik those plans I was telling you about, two pieces of blueprint with some fancy French name". But inspector, this is preposterous, I... Detain the plane for Istanbul. Mr Langston, I'm afraid I must hold you for questioning. Take him out. I'm sorry about this, old man. I rather liked you. Mr Morgan, I'm afraid we all owe you a great apology. It's all so simple, a child could have understood it. They was Gromek and Brodnik, and Shaslik and Papinek. Now when Gromek... You look strained, take this. - When Gromek met Papinek... - Just drink it. He didn't know that Brodnik had taken the plans from Shaslik, and... You know, you do have the prettiest eyes of any doctor I have ever seen. I would... - I'll take care of him. - I'll do it. I haven't seen the end that he could use to. - Marty, where's the car? - Across the street. Here. - Hey, terribly sorry. We just got married. - I am awfully sorry. Healthy looking couple. Probably'll have a large family. We better get a bigger car. |
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