LEAP YEAR (2010)
Morning, gentlemen. Feet.
So happy you're here.
This is the third
open house and not one bite.
Well...
Don't worry.
l have everything
under control.
Anna, you are a Realtor?
I'm a stager.
l stage apartments for Realtors.
l transform ordinary spaces
into something special.
Most people don't know
what it is they want until l show it to them,
and so many places
need my help.
Oh!
Not the Davenport,
of course.
It's just a very fine line
between elegant and dowdy.
l just think maybe
a quarter-inch higher.
Plus an eighth of an inch?
We'll get it right.
Ow!
You did that on purpose.
Knock it off.
As I'm sure
you're aware,
apartments at the Davenport
don't come up very often,
and we have more than
our share of applicants. So, why you?
l have lived in Boston
my entire life,
and l have always
dreamed of living here.
And thankfully,
l have found somebody who shares that dream,
and l can assure you
that you will not find two people more in sync
with your exceptionally
high standards and,
if l may be so bold,
your taste.
Thank you.
Wow!
With a bit of luck,
we might get some offers.
Come on, Charlie.
You know it's not about luck.
It's about preparation.
Put these in the oven
half an hour before you open
and you'll have
five offers before noon.
No luck needed.
Okay, say it with me.
Three bedrooms.
Three bedrooms.
Concierge.
Concierge.
Full gym and swimming pool
looking over the common. l mean, come on!
Don't get cocky.
Why, you don't think
they liked us?
l like us.
Don't you like us?
We're okay. All right.
Okay.
Here we go.
Ready? And...
Ugly!
Excuse me?
Not you, sweetie.
It's Mr. Sheinbaum
e-mailing me updates
of his double bypass.
I'm glad
l skipped lunch.
No, no, no,
this is good. This is good,
because this way
l don't have to go in. We can go to dinner.
Studio apartment,
two offers already.
That's 'cause
you're a genius.
Have you packed yet?
Your flight's at 11:00.
I'm fine,
just you don't be late.
We've got an 8: rez
and they're strict.
When am l ever late?
When your dad
comes out of the woodwork
demanding to
see his daughter, that's when.
l have to go, Jer.
l haven't seen him in weeks.
Okay, just wouldn't want
you all riled up for our very special dinner.
You know l don't
like surprises.
You'll like this one.
See you.
Oh, Anna,
this is gonna blow your mind!
What'd you buy?
A lot, l got a lot,
but that's not it.
l wanted to
tell you something.
Guess who l saw
coming out of DePrisco's?
Who?
Jeremy!
You did? When?
On the way here.
The cab was stuck
in traffic and l look over,
and he's walking
out of the store
carrying that little red bag.
The bag.
There's only one reason
people go into DePrisco's.
You're gonna have
a better engagement ring than me, you big jerk!
Oh, my God.
Did you know?
No. l mean, l did put
his name on the mailing list a couple months ago
hoping he'd get the hint,
but...
Oh! He got the hint!
l think he got the hint!
Okay, hold on,
we gotta work on your surprise face,
'cause l don't want him
to know l told you...
Okay, ask me.
Ready?
Will you marry me?
What? Are you scared?
That was awful. Try it again.
Okay.
Try it again.
Mmm...
Bigger eyes.
And maybe a little, "Who, me?"
The good news is,
you have time to practice between now and then.
Can l marry you?
No, thank you.
Already married, huh?
Getting engaged.
Engaged?
Dad.
My daughter
is engaged?
Garon! Champagne!
Let's have a couple
of beers, banana.
I'll get them.
You're gonna
be married.
Jack Brady.
Import-export, real estate. Glad to meet you.
She's been four years
with the guy. What was he thinking?
l proposed
to her mother after a week!
l proposed to her
after half an hour.
Exactly!
Where's the lucky guy?
Packing.
He has a cardiology convention in Dublin.
It's a good thing
that Jeremy finally came around.
You might have
had to follow him to Ireland this weekend.
It is leap year,
you know.
Dad, do not tell
that story again.
Why not?
It's a family myth.
It is the
honest-to-God truth!
That's what Grandma Jane
did to Grandpa Tom.
They'd been dating
for a while and he was dragging his feet,
so she finally suggested
they pay a visit to the old country.
February 29th,
Dublin, Ireland, she hits him with it.
Boom!
Ring on finger,
signed, sealed, delivered.
Well, I'm not going
to have to pull a Grandma Jane.
That's my girl.
I'm finally going to get some grandkids.
Dad, I've got to go.
Mmm-mmm.
No, l just got here!
Yeah, well
you were late. We said 7:
Oh!
I'm just happy
that we want the same things.
You know,
you always have it figured out for us.
l mean, even with
my crazy schedule and...
You know
l appreciate it, right?
So...
So this is for you.
Jeremy.
They're earrings.
Yeah.
For my ears.
Oh! Sorry.
Oh, God.
Dr. Sloane. Hey, Bill.
Oh! Sounds like
you're gonna have to go in from the spine.
Send me a photo.
I'll have a look. Okay? All right. Sorry.
Why don't you
try them on?
Oh! Sorry. Sure.
Yikes. There's an aorta to write home about.
Look at that.
Honey, not here.
Yummy.
So, l...
It's not gonna work.
I'm so sorry, Anna.
Bill says l really "aorta" go in.
Look,
he actually wrote that. He wrote "aorta."
So I'll pick up my bag and just
go straight to the airport when I'm done.
Forgive me?
Of course.
Okay.
l am so sorry.
l love you.
l love you.
Love you.
All right.
You "aorta" run.
It's a good thing
that Jeremy finally came around.
You might have had to
follow him to Ireland this weekend
and pull a Grandma Jane.
It is leap year, you know.
"Leap-year proposals
are an old folklore tradition
"that dates back
to the 5th century."
Sure.
In Ireland,
there's this tradition
that in a leap year,
a woman can propose to a man on February 29th,
one day every four years.
Will you marry me?
Yes.
That's ridiculous.
Are you traveling on business or pleasure?
I'm going to propose
to my boyfriend on leap day.
Are you now?
Congratulations.
Thank you.
Jeremy, my boyfriend,
is already there on business.
We've been together
four years. Four years.
It's a long time.
It's not like
I'm rushing anything by doing this, you know.
He bought me earrings.
Don't get me wrong, they're beautiful,
but earrings
don't exactly say commitment.
Not that commitment
is an issue.
l mean, we're buying
this apartment together and it's perfect.
l know exactly
how I'm going to change it.
We're just gonna
knock down that wall.
You see? If we open up
the kitchen a little,
l think it flows better
into the dining area.
Just creates
a more free overall...
Ladies and gentlemen,
this is your captain speaking.
It looks like
there's a spot of bad weather up ahead,
so we may experience
just a little bit of turbulence.
I'm getting engaged.
I'm getting engaged.
I'm not gonna die
without getting engaged!
This is your captain
here again, ladies and gentlemen.
l may have underestimated
the storm just a little bit,
but I'm afraid
we are being diverted to Cardiff, Wales,
as Dublin Airport
has been shut down.
What?
Once landed, ground staff
will be happy to book you onto connecting flights
in order to get you
to your final destination.
Wales? No, we can't
land in Wales.
At least
we're landing.
Yes, but I'm on
a schedule.
Excuse me.
Yeah, l need to get through.
Cardiff, Wales Airport regrets to announce
that due to
inclement weather,
all flights today
have been canceled.
I'm sorry, there's
nothing very much l can do about it.
I'm so sorry.
Yeah, could you move?
There are
no more flights until tomorrow.
No flights until tomorrow?
Tomorrow, madam.
Tomorrow.
l think
that's what l said. Didn't l, Beryl?
That is what
you said.
Well, no, that's not
going to work for me.
Look. I'm going to Dublin
to propose to my boyfriend on the 29th, leap day.
It's an old Irish tradition,
and l need to buy a dress
and find a ring
and book a restaurant.
So, between us girls,
l think you can see
why l really need to be there today.
Oh! Right.
Right!
Beryl, will you ring
Dublin International Airport
and get them
to open a runway especially for madam?
Right away.
We regret to announce that
all commercial passenger ferries to Ireland
have been canceled.
Will all passengers
booked for the crossing to Ringaskiddy
please report to
the information desk?
Hi. I'd like a ticket
to Cork, please.
Ferry's canceled.
What is wrong
with this country?
l usually blame
the government,
but this one's
the weather. Storm, see?
Well, we'll just
see about that. I'll find my own boat.
We're going
to have to go in to Dingle.
But l paid for Cork!
Okay. Dingle will do.
You can take the man
out of the fish,
but you can't take
the fish out of the water!
That a good one,
Dekko?
Hello.
Are you open?
Australian.
South African.
Actually, she's American.
Anna, from Boston.
l just need someone
to tell me how to get to Dublin from here.
Is there a bus, maybe?
I'm sorry?
The year
the last Dublin bus left Dingle.
No, no, no. The train
stopped running in '87.
The bus stopped
running in 1989.
It was 1987.
Okay.
Is there a taxi service
or something?
Perfect. Thank you.
My battery's going
to die any second.
Ma'am.
Oh, thank you.
Hello there.
Hello.
Hello?
Hello. Yes, l need
a taxi to Dublin.
Yeah, where you
calling from?
I'm in a funny little pub
called the Carack or, l don't know, Caragh?
Carahg?
Whatever.
We don't drive
American redheads.
What do you mean
you don't drive American redheads?
How do you know
the color of my hair?
Of course.
You're the taxi driver. Well, l need you...
l need you
to drive me to Dublin.
Dublin, is it?
Mmm.
Well, I'll tell you
something about Dublin, Anna from Boston.
Dublin is a city
of chancers and cheats and backstabbing snakes.
It's where the worst
of humanity collects to poison this fair country.
l wouldn't drive you
to Dublin if you were to offer me 500.
Jesus! I'd sell
me wife for 500!
Trust me,
you'd have few takers.
All right.
Anyone else want to go to Dublin for 500?
I'm your man, missus!
It's bad luck
to start a journey on a Friday.
Saturday. It's bad luck
to start a journey on a Saturday.
Tuesday!
No, it's Sunday,
to be sure.
Fine. It's late.
I'll just find
somebody to drive me in the morning.
So, if one of you
can direct me to the nearest hotel?
Or bed and breakfast?
Of course. Of course.
This is also the hotel.
Bathroom's down the hall.
You have to flush it twice. Seriously, twice.
Just like
the Four Seasons.
Okay.
l noticed a menu
on the bar?
It's closed.
Closed.
But given the famous
Irish tradition
of hospitality
and generosity...
I'll do you
a hang sandwich.
What's a hang?
Hang is a verb.
It's not a sandwich.
It did die. Of course.
Huh!
There we go.
Hey,
the lights are gone!
Oh, Jesus,
the lights failed again.
Women!
It's over now.
For the love of God.
What the hell you doing?
Plugging something in.
Give me that.
It's personal.
You fried my BlackBerry.
You fried the whole
village! Idiot!
Jackass.
You're here in Ireland?
Yeah.
l wanted to surprise you,
but it's turned into a complete disaster.
At this point I'm just glad
somebody knows where l am.
l mean, seriously, you have no
idea what passes for a hotel out here,
or common courtesy.
l can't wait
to see you.
Well, l can't wait
to see you, either.
Well, when will
you get here?
l should be there
this afternoon. l just need to get a cab.
Great surprise, honey.
I love you.
l love you, too. Bye.
Sorry, Declan,
you've had plenty of time to pay your debt.
But I'm almost there.
I'm down to the last of the bloody interest.
Come on, Tommo,
be reasonable, would you?
You can't take
the blessed kitchen!
You'll put me
out of business!
The whole lot,
or the kitchen goes in the back of the van.
Give me a month.
A month? A week.
A week? God!
Ten days, 900,
guaranteed.
A thousand, Dekko.
That's the
old interest right there.
The interest on
the interest on the... Oh, man.
Ten days, 1,.
Okay. Okay.
You'll have it.
You have my word.
Done.
Later.
All right, lads.
Come on, then, let's do it.
But only 'cause you're desperate.
I'll drive you
to Dublin.
Will you get out?
500, like you said.
Yes or no?
You're not a fan
of Dublin.
You've made that very clear,
so l won't inconvenience you.
It's not
inconvenient at all.
What part of "get out"
do you not understand?
A simple yes
or no will do.
Yes, you can
drive me, now...
Good. Be outside
in 10 minutes.
God!
Naked here!
By the way,
it's 100 for the room,
and that includes
the vandalism.
I'll leave you to it.
Naked here.
There you are, Bob.
Hop in.
Please tell me that
that is the car
that is taking us
around the corner to the actual taxi.
I'll have you know
that is a Renault 4. She's classic!
Worst fears confirmed.
She's rock solid right there!
Beautiful. Come on.
None of those
fancy airbags to get in the way.
Don't listen to her.
She knows not what she says.
Do you mind?
Ah! Sure.
Thank you.
How does that work?
Can you be careful with that?
That was a gift from my boyfriend.
He bought you
a suitcase?
It's a Vuitton.
What?
A Louis Vuitton?
Come on.
Is it yourself, Louis? Can l give
you a hand getting into the car, Louis?
She named her suitcase.
She's a crackpot.
You can't
go now, missus.
Why not?
A black cat just
crossed your path.
You can't start a journey
when you see a black cat.
Ten years bad luck.
No, it's not a cat,
it's a magpie.
Anyway,
it's 15 years bad luck.
Thirteen!
It's 12,
definitely 12.
Then l guess
it's a good thing l don't believe in luck, so...
Well, you ought to,
if you're getting into that, you.
Safe journey.
May the road
rise up to meet you.
See you, lads!
Good luck, Declan!
Bye, now.
l tell you
something,
they'll kill
each other!
Okay,
we're here, on the road.
Uh-huh!
It's only February 27th.
l still have two days to get there, so...
Mmm-hmm.
Where are we?
l may even get there before the stores close.
l could get some shopping in.
That's the reason
you're going to Dublin, is to shop?
No, I'm...
lf you must know,
I'm going there to propose to my boyfriend.
He's at a medical
conference there. He's a cardiologist.
We are applying
to move into the most amazing apartment,
and l actually thought
he was going to propose to me the other night,
but he didn't.
Yeah?
Yeah, and you guys have
this great tradition
that a woman can
propose to a man
on the 29th of February
in a leap year.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Mmm-hmm.
So l thought,
"Why not?"
Yeah!
Yeah.
l mean...
That's the
stupidest thing I've ever heard!
No, it isn't.
Yeah, it is.
No, it's a tradition.
It's a romantic tradition.
It's a day for
desperate women trying to trap themselves a man
who clearly doesn't
want to get married.
You've got to know
that if your man wanted to propose,
he'd have done it
already. Fact!
No one touches the music!
Are you crazy?
You know nothing about me or Jeremy!
You know what you are?
You're a cynic.
You're a lonely,
bitter cynic.
Better that than an idiot.
"Leap year, diddly-eye!
"Will you marry me,
diddly-eye?
"I've got a suitcase
called Louis, diddly-eye!"
What are you,
the Lucky Charms Leprechaun?
You know what? We are done.
We're not talking anymore.
I'm not paying you to talk,
I'm not paying for your opinion.
I'm paying
you to drive, so just get in the car and drive.
Suits me, Bob.
And what is with
this Bob thing?
Aren't you going
to do something?
l am doing something.
I'm waiting for them to move.
For God's sake.
Hi, cows.
Look, l have spent
the past 24 hours in every level of hell,
and l am not going to let
your black and white asses
drag me any further,
so if you know what's good for you, you'll move.
It comes as a real shock
to find out that you speak fluent cow.
Now!
That's right.
Nice cows.
Let's move.
Let's move along. Come on, cows.
Why don't you
propose something to them?
Yeah, you guys are...
Wow, you're big.
We're gonna just...
Oh, yeah,
they're moving now.
Must be your personality.
Yours is a bit
more repellent,
so if you want to try...
That's right.
That's how you get things done.
That's it, girl!
That's right!
That is how you get things done.
You don't just
sit around like some backwoods Irish bumpkin.
You're welcome.
You might want to
just watch your
step.
$600 shoes.
Put them in the wash,
they'll be grand.
Put them in the wash?
The wash?
You do not put
these shoes in the wash.
Whoa! Whoa!
Whoa!
Stop!
Whoa! Wait!
Stop it!
What do l do?
Get in the car
and use the brake!
Baby!
l got you, baby! l got you!
Baby!
Don't hurt yourself!
Make it stop!
My purse is in there!
Oh, darling.
Oh, Jesus.
My Renault 4!
Look what you done!
What I've done?
You couldn't just
wait for the cows!
You couldn't
just help me?
It's gonna cost at least
200 to tow her out.
That's not gonna
come out of my pocket. It's coming out of yours!
Oh, like hell.
You will have to kill me before l pay you a dime!
There's an idea.
Where you going?
Dublin.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Look, this is an easy fix.
All we need to do
is find a phone,
call the garage,
get a tow, hop in the car,
back on the road
and we'll be in Dublin in no time.
Just cool the jets,
would you?
Wait! Hey!
l wouldn't
get in there if l was you!
And l care about
your opinion because...
Fine, go ahead.
All right there, sweetheart?
Hi.
You looking
for a ride?
Yes, I'm going
to Dublin.
Oh!
In Dublin's fair city
where the girls are so pretty
Yes.
Now there's a coincidence,
'cause I'm going
there myself.
Let me help you with
the old suitcase there.
That's very sweet of you.
Not at all.
And l didn't
even have to ask.
Top of the morning to you!
Oh! Morning.
That's a fancy
bit of suitcase, no mistake.
It's quality.
You can see that just by Looking at it, you know?
Mmm-hmm.
Well, I'd say
it's been a pleasure,
but l think
we both know that...
Wait. No! Wait!
Wait! Come back here! You can't just...
They...
There you are.
Soon as l finish this,
I'll call us a tow truck.
Us? There is no us.
l am calling a real taxi.
You leave me alone.
Okay, Bob.
Excuse me.
Eoghan?
Eoghan.
Oh!
Do you have
a phone, please? Please?
Thank you.
Safe home.
Yeah, yeah.
So nice of you
to look after my suitcase,
but I'll take it back.
Thank you.
Is that right, missus?
I'll call the
American ambassador.
Oh, is this his?
Well, l just...
l...
Fun's over, lads.
Give the girl
her stuff back.
And who the hell are you?
Nobody.
Just keeping the peace.
Yeah?
Well, you can keep your peace out of it.
That was
impressive.
Ow!
Out.
Fair enough.
Hi. l just...
Should just get
my things and go.
Must be something special.
Who?
Your fella.
Oh!
Jeremy. He is.
He's...
He's a cardiologist.
Hi. When is the next train
to Dublin?
You're just in time.
The next train leaves
in two hours and 43 minutes.
Great.
It's a few bob
to Dublin, mind.
"Bob"?
Cash.
Money. You know?
Mmm.
Hey, fella.
Ballycarbery.
Mmm. Same to you.
There.
Ballycarbery Castle.
It's one of
the 10 wonders of Ireland, so I'm told.
Can only be
15 minutes to the top.
l don't want to
miss the train.
Yeah, well
that's a good point. Don't miss the train.
No.
Only two
and a half hours.
Time is going to fly.
I'll stay here.
Suit yourself.
l will.
Hi.
Hi.
Declan?
Wait! l love castles.
It's beautiful.
I'm sorry you're
not gonna get to Dublin before the shops shut.
l have
other interests besides shopping.
l have a life.
A job.
What do you do, then?
l stage apartments.
Stage apartments,
now that's...
That's...
What's that?
Well, when somebody
is selling an apartment or a home,
l bring stuff in
and make it look as beautiful as it can look.
And they get
to keep all the stuff when they buy it?
No, l take it away.
I'm just presenting them with the possibilities.
l put a sheen on it.
Hang on. So you do
your job, yeah?
Yeah.
They buy the house,
yeah?
Yeah.
And then you come along
and you take all the stuff away again, yeah?
Yeah.
You're a con artist.
No, I'm not a con...
That's just
so typical of you.
You think the worst
of everybody.
No.
Oh, no? I'd love
to know who you have a good word for.
l can think of a couple
of good words for you.
Riddle me this.
lf your apartment's on fire,
your beautiful apartment,
what would you take?
What?
lf your house was on fire
and you had 60 seconds,
what would you take?
Come on.
l...
Come on. Would it be
the Chihuahua on the duvet?
I'm not playing
this game with you.
There you are.
What would you take?
What would you take?
Your lovely inn is on fire.
Hmm.
What are you
going to take? You know, your...
Flames coming up
the stairs. You've got 60 seconds.
Oh!
The bottles of alcohol
in your pub are exploding.
What are you
going to grab?
l know exactly
what I'd "grab."
Oh, yeah? What?
Not telling you.
You can dish it,
but you can't take it, can you?
It's really...
It's a castle!
Told you.
So what's the story
with this place?
Well, hundreds
of years ago,
there was this
beautiful girl called Grainne.
Now, she was promised
in marriage to this fella called Fionn,
who was kind of
a cranky old warlord,
old enough to be her father,
old enough to be her grandfather,
and therefore
she wasn't
in love with him.
Anyway, on the night
of their betrothal,
whom did she meet
but a handsome young warrior, Diarmuid.
They fell madly in love
at first sight, but what could she do?
Well, she slips
a sleeping potion in everyone's drinks,
and the pair of them
run off together across the Shannon.
Fionn wakes
and there's Grainne gone. Well, he goes mental.
Takes his army
and heads off in hot pursuit.
But it was the people,
you know, the people in the villages of Ireland,
they took pity on
Diarmuid and Grainne.
They hid them in forests
and in their barns and castles,
where they'd sleep one night
and then they'd move on.
Come on.
Is it safe?
Of course.
Sleep was all they did,
'cause Diarmuid, good man that he was,
was suffering the old guilt
about two-timing Fionn
and out of respect for him,
didn't, you know, take it any further.
l get it.
Oh, yeah.
And then they came
to this castle
and this view.
Wow.
And 'tis said, you know,
that, unable to resist such beauty,
that here,
in this place, they...
They consummated
their love.
Oh, my God.
You're hitting on me.
I'm what?
I'm the young woman
on the eve of her engagement
that can't resist
a handsome stranger? Oh, come on.
I'm what?
You didn't honestly think
that was gonna work, did you?
Don't flatter
yourself, darling. The story's true,
but it sure as shite
ain't about you.
No?
No, you arrogant...
Arrogant what exactly?
Well, that's a tough one.
Is it American?
Oh, no. The train.
Wait! Wait,
l have a ticket!
I'm very...
You just had to take me
up there, didn't you?
One of the seven
wonders of Ireland!
Okay.
Oh, no.
Well, that speeded
things up a bit.
l hate you.
In the old days,
l could have held it for you,
but it's all
"time is money" nowadays.
Come on, now.
Come on, and don't be worrying yourself.
We'll get you to
where you want to go.
Forecast said sunny.
Here we are.
The best little B8B in Tipperary.
Come in. Come in.
Look what
the cat dragged in.
Oh! My poor dears.
You're lucky,
so you are.
Just half an hour ago,
l had two backpackers at the door
wanting the room.
But they weren't married.
Admitted it right out.
No shame.
So l sent them packing.
Right is right,
rain or no rain.
Hmm.
So, it's Mr. and Mrs...
Brady.
O'Callaghan.
Bradycallaghan.
O'Bradycallaghan.
We're not long married,
and it's still quite a mouthful for an American.
l come from a long,
long line of Dingle
O'Bradycallaghans.
We're praying
that one day
we'll be able to have
a son and heir to help keep the name going.
Anna, Declan to you.
Lovely.
Now, let's get you to your room.
Thank you.
After you, petal.
Thank you, sunshine.
Would you like a hand
with the bag, pumpkin?
Well, you're not sleeping
in that bed with me, Mr. O'Bradycallaghan.
Maybe you're not sleeping
in the bed with me.
Very gallant.
Gallant?
Welcome to the age
of equality.
You lot wanted the vote.
Live with it, darling.
Comfy.
We'll flip for it, darling.
Okay, fair's fair.
Heads l win,
tails you lose.
Heads.
Heads it is.
Shame. You can sleep
in the bath.
It's a shower.
You can sleep
in the shower.
Fine.
Just so long as
l don't have to sleep anywhere near you.
I'm washing in the shower
Getting mud off
Love hot water
Got a bruise there
Got a bruise there
Wait a minute. You lying,
deceiving son of a...
Get up! Get up.
Get up.
Whoa! What?
Oh! "Heads you win,
tails l lose."
You finally
got that, did you?
Good for you.
Up! Get up!
This is my bed. Liars forfeit.
And take a shower.
You smell.
Mmm-mmm.
You can see right
through the curtain.
Can you?
Can you?
Okay,
liars forfeit, liars forfeit!
No peeking.
Come in.
Hello, dear.
Everything all right?
Now, for dinner
we've got tripe. Homemade. Family recipe.
Tripe.
Nothing like a bit
of cow's stomach on a rainy day.
Yum. Did you hear that,
darling? Tripe!
Right, tripe.
l was thinking,
Mrs. O'Docherty,
to thank you
for taking us in on such short notice,
why don't you
let me cook?
No, darling,
l couldn't.
Oh, you could.
He's a chef. He's very good.
It's true!
Really?
Well, that's gas.
We've got two Italians
staying, as well. Would that be okay?
No problem at all!
Thanks a million.
Good call.
What the hell
are you doing now?
This recipe says
three medium carrots,
and l just think this one is a little
large to be classified as medium.
And if you look
at these two,
they're clearly medium,
while this one is slightly...
Watch.
Three medium-sized carrots.
You know, l don't think there's anything
wrong with wanting to be precise.
Okay.
Well, then
you must be very,
very precise.
Here's an idea.
Why don't you stop trying
to control everything in the known universe?
It's dinner.
Have a little faith.
It'll all work out.
Heard that one before.
Well, maybe you
should have listened.
Really? You think?
It'll all work out.
My dad was the king of "it'll all work out."
Time shares in the Bahamas,
mobile video stores,
whatever the next
big nothing was,
all our money
went right after it.
But don't worry.
It'll all work out.
Cut to me working
two part-time jobs after school
and us getting our house
repossessed on Christmas Eve. Ho, ho, ho.
So you will forgive me
if l don't listen.
I'm sorry.
No, I'm sorry.
A father's someone
you should be able to rely on, you know?
Anyway, dinner.
We have got
cabbages, a leek,
three medium carrots.
You're not one of those
vegetarians, are you?
No.
Good.
Declan one,
chicken nil.
Sweet.
Coq au vim?
What?
Give me strength.
Don't start telling me
that you've never had chicken stew before.
Of course l have.
I'm wondering where
it is that you think chickens come from.
The freezer section.
l know, l know. l...
You just surprised me.
You keep doing that.
Give me the carrots.
Yes, carrots.
Sorry.
We build up
the temperature a little bit.
You don't need
to chop them. It's hard to hold.
That smells amazing.
Good girl. And...
So this is what
you call staging, is it?
Sort of.
Not too shabby.
Here?
Yeah.
Impeccable.
The chicken
was wonderful.
Wasn't it?
And I'm usually awful at chicken.
Jeremy always says
l make it too dry.
Jeremy?
Oh!
Jeremy. Our...
Our next door neighbor.
Who sometimes
comes by for dinner.
Right, Declan?
Mmm. Yeah, yeah.
He's a lovely old soul.
Yeah.
A little bit
learning difficulties, you know.
Tells everyone
he's a cardiologist. It's a scream.
But he's a happy chap,
you know.
He's got a little thing,
bless him, for her.
Antique, Frank?
Antique, yeah. Like me.
Wedding present,
they were.
It's only 44 years,
you cheeky rascal!
See?
That's what it takes to be married for 44 years.
The kiss.
Always kiss like
it's the first time and the last time.
Grand.
Well, come on then, son.
Show us old ones
how it's done.
Sorry?
Well, I've kissed
my wife.
Stefano has certainly
kissed his wife.
No, we're fine.
We did it earlier, kiss.
Done and dusted.
A bit of chivalry, man.
You know what I'm saying?
Oh! That's perfect.
lf that was a kiss,
I'm surprised you're still wed to him at all.
No, no,
they're shy, that's all.
Yes. Really shy.
You're among friends!
You're young,
married, in love!
Anyone can see that.
Damn it, man.
Kiss the girl!
Brayo!
There you go.
Now that's a kiss!
It's quite wet.
Show a little mercy,
would you?
All right.
But one snore
and you're back in the shower.
Great.
Who'd have thought
it'd take two days to get to Dublin?
l have to charge you
an overnighter, by the way.
Surprise.
Fifty.
Seventy-five it is.
Running total 675.
Fine.
If it's all about money for you, then 675 it is.
Good night.
Night.
I'm so sorry
I'm not there yet.
You can't imagine
what I've been through.
Worse than when
they lost our luggage in Barbados?
Like that times 10.
l just... l just
can't wait to see you.
Well, maybe this
will cheer you up.
l just heard from the board,
and we got the apartment!
What?
Yeah.
l just got off the phone
with Edith. It's ours.
Ah! Jeremy!
That is exactly
what l needed to hear this morning.
Everything
is working out for us. I'm so excited.
We'll have to
celebrate in person when you get here.
We sure will.
Hurry up already.
I miss you.
l miss you, too.
Morning.
Yeah.
Oh, is this for me?
Yeah.
Morning, lovebirds!
Sleep well, did you?
Yes, thank you.
So, what's on
the agenda today, then?
Mmm. Off to Dublin
for me.
Well, you can't
do that now.
Why not?
This is Sunday.
Never start a journey
on a Sunday, or a full moon.
Oh, well, l don't believe
in that superstition stuff.
How are you
on train timetables? Do you believe in them?
Sunday.
No trains.
No trains?
No.
Oh! For God's sake.
l have to be in Dublin
by the 29th. That's tomorrow.
Why is that
again, darling?
Fine. Okay.
Frank,
you have a car, don't you?
Oh, yes.
Yes.
Okay. l could...
l would be willing to pay you
a substantial amount of money
if you would
maybe drive me.
No.
Oh! It's not
the money, girl. It's Eileen.
She's got it.
Gone to Mass.
Then the weekly shop,
you know.
Okay, well, then
when she's back, you...
She won't be back
till all hours.
Why?
It's a fair old jaunt
to Dublin.
Where is she?
Dublin.
Bingo!
What?
Bus station's
that way.
What?
Knock it off.
It's hailstones.
Are you serious?
Ow!
Run!
Come on. It's fecking
Murphy's Law with you.
Come on!
l got Louis.
Don't worry.
Ow!
Those sting!
The size
of golf balls!
Jesus Christ!
Is Lord.
Have you any just cause
or impediment why this man and this woman
should not be
joined together in holy matrimony?
No, no, Father.
You carry on.
I'm sure that they know
what they're doing.
Good. In that case,
you're very welcome. Why don't you sit down?
Come on.
Dublin. We should be making tracks.
No.
The priest is gonna give us a ride
to the bus station
when it's over.
We can walk!
I'm not walking
another four hours in these shoes.
Besides, look
how beautiful it all is.
l kind of
hate weddings.
Why? Because people are in
love? That's so offensive to you?
Yeah.
You know,
you have all of these
random opinions and a bad attitude.
What do you know?
You're clearly not married,
and you have obviously
never been engaged.
Actually, l have.
Once.
l don't want to
interrupt a good party,
but l want to say
thank you to my husband.
l want to say,
may you never steal, lie or cheat.
But if you must steal,
then steal away
my sorrows.
And if you must lie,
lie with me
all the nights of my life.
And if you must cheat,
then please cheat death,
because l couldn't
live a day without you.
Cheers!
Are you all right?
Grand. You know,
it's just hot in there.
Do you want
to talk about it?
Listen,
Bob.
You're not
in America now.
You're in Ireland.
So, have a drink.
Shut up.
l was just
trying to help.
Help?
Yeah.
That's hilarious.
The woman who's so desperate,
she's diddly-eying her way to Dublin,
making the most
important decision of her life
based on some
ridiculous tradition,
which, frankly,
is a load of old poo.
So, thank you,
but it's not l who needs the help, okay?
It is not
a load of poo.
It's romantic.
It's really,
really romantic.
I'm not good
at weddings.
They're better with
a couple martinis.
Okay, thank you very much!
We're going to do
a special request now for the bridesmaids.
Want a go?
No. No, l don't...
l don't Riverdance.
Do you never let
your hair down, woman?
Yes.
In my way, l do.
Good.
Now, this is an easy one.
You'll pick it up. Just follow them.
We're going in a circle
going that way.
No, no,
put me down!
I'm really sorry.
l was spinning.
Forget about it. At least
it wasn't my husband.
Yeah. Right.
At least it wasn't him.
I'm...
l thought
l was bad at weddings.
Aren't you supposed to be
taking me to Dublin?
Well, just tell me when.
As ever, your servant awaits.
You know what,
Declan?
Do you know
what you are?
Mmm-hmm.
You're a beast.
You're a real
beast.
Hmm.
And l cannot
stand you.
Really?
Mmm-hmm.
But you know what?
I'm onto you.
Is that right?
All your beastishness
is like...
It's an act.
It's a great, big,
massive cover-up.
And you growl
and you snap, but you are in...
You're in pain.
And you've got a...
You've got a big thorn
in your beasty paw.
Like a lion.
A lovely, lovely lion.
Great.
I'm sorry.
That's romantic.
Up you come. Up!
God, you're a lump.
My suitcase!
Don't worry about Louis.
I'll get him.
You're joking me.
Perfect.
You can
deduct the coffee from my bill.
Deduct away.
Don't forget to add on for a new pair of shoes,
Pukey.
Put them in the wash,
they'll be grand.
You missed your bus.
There's another one
in 20 minutes.
Oh, God. Am l still
coming with you?
l am paying you
to take me to Dublin
and you're taking me
to Dublin.
That's fine.
Thank you.
He's out.
l left a message
with the front desk.
So, Dublin.
Right on time.
So l suppose
l should pay you.
l suppose you should.
There'll be an at the hotel.
Right, so I'll be
portering again, will l?
Not if you don't
want to.
l didn't say that.
We can get a cab.
You've got legs,
haven't you, woman?
My best feature,
so I'm told.
Who told you that?
It's a beautiful city.
And l haven't seen
one backstabbing snake.
Yeah, well, it's the chancers
and cheats that you have to watch out for.
She's here,
isn't she?
In Dublin.
One of the chancers and cheats.
The blonde in the photo.
Who was the guy?
Oh!
So him and her...
Right.
Sorry.
We were all running
the Caragh together, me, Kaleigh, Ryan.
So we bought the pub
and built it up from nothing.
We really got it going.
l mean, we were flying.
And l thought
that me and Kaleigh were mad for each other.
Apparently not.
So that thing I'd grab
if l had 60 seconds,
it's my mother's
Claddagh ring.
You know, the ones
with the two hands holding the crowned heart.
Mmm-hmm.
Well, she's got it.
Well, you're here now.
You should find her and get it back.
l don't know.
It's your mother's ring.
Anyway, l thought
it was your ring
we were meant to be
worrying about.
Diddly-eye.
Oh, yeah. Right.
Well, I'm glad to see
you're finally on board.
It has nothing to do with me.
I'm just the old bag carrier around here.
Why should l care?
So you don't?
Would it make
a difference?
Come on.
So.
So.
Here.
Nah, it's okay.
Declan, take it.
We had a deal. Please?
Tell you what. Why don't you just give
me that one bob and we'll call it a day?
Which one bob?
The one we flipped
for the bed.
Yeah.
Liar.
Well, best of luck.
Yeah.
So long, Louis.
Anna.
Yes?
Anna! Anna!
Hi! Finally. God.
l thought l was gonna have to
call a helicopter rescue team to come get you.
Where have you been? Hi.
Hey.
Long story.
Sorry.
It's good
to see you.
You okay? Yeah?
Mmm. Yeah.
Hi.
I'm sorry,
do l know you?
Oh!
Jeremy, this is Declan.
Declan drove...
He helped me get
from Dingle to Dublin.
Oh! Okay. Yeah, yeah,
yeah. Yeah, well, l don't envy that job.
This lady is not
big on adventure.
No.
Nice to meet you, bro.
Nice to meet you.
Yeah. Yeah.
So did she
take care of you?
Did you tip him?
Oh!
She paid me.
Great. Well, thanks for
getting her home safe.
Oh, God, l missed you!
l missed you! l missed you! l missed you!
l missed you, too.
No, l really
missed you.
l did. And...
And it got me thinking.
Why aren't we married?
Will you marry me?
Are you serious?
Am l serious? Yeah.
Well, I'm down on my knee. l...
l got this.
No pressure,
but it's all on camera.
Sweetheart.
Sweetheart.
Sweetie?
l... Were you supposed
to give me an answer?
Yes. Of course.
Yeah?
Yes.
Okay.
Let's try this on.
Ah! It fits!
l have champagne
waiting in the room,
so we should go on up.
Great.
Thank you.
l never thought
I'd see you in Dublin.
Declan.
Kaleigh.
There you go.
And there's pints. They're on the way.
Thank you!
You are saving the pub.
You're keeping
the pans in the kitchen. l will kiss you later.
Congratulations! Hi!
Let me see it!
Wow.
Mmm.
Dekko.
Tom. There you are.
You're short.
But not by much.
Sorry. Come on, lads!
Oh, my God,
look at this place!
Do you like it?
Do l like it?
l want to throw you
out of your own window and take it.
Hold on a minute there.
You can show us the color
of your wallet for a change.
That's all.
Drinks on the house!
l feel like your
whole happy ending
is gonna be a real test
for our friendship.
I'm pretty sure
she would have been happy
with just this apartment.
l don't think you needed to propose.
Oh! It was kind of
a package deal.
Really?
What, buy an apartment, they throw in a ring?
More like
the other way around.
What do you mean?
Well, l think it was
Edith, from the board.
She called me in Dublin,
probing about our marital status.
Can you believe that?
Nothing specific, just interested, you know?
Like the residents,
they're kind of old-fashioned
when it comes to
issues like this. Blah, blah, blah.
l got the message.
Married, you're in. Unmarried, you're not.
So l just said
we were hours away from getting engaged.
l just said it
and it came out.
And l don't know
where it came from,
but l could
almost hear them cutting our keys.
So l put down the phone
and thought, "Well,
"why the hell not,
you know?"
Really?
Sure. l mean,
we'd have gotten around
to it eventually, right?
Right. Of course.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, Libby, l want
to show you this view.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's gorgeous.
Okay.
Is that the fire alarm?
Really?
Okay, everybody,
l guess we'd better take this party downstairs.
The phones.
Where is the remote
for this thing?
These things are useless
without the remote. Anna!
Do you have
everything you need?
Can you just look
around for valuables?
For laptops,
cameras, whatever.
l think the cameras...
Okay, here's the video camera.
l still haven't
put the proposal up on Facebook,
so let me get that.
Oh, sweetie,
can you get the...
Anna?
Anna?
We have one
minestrone soup, two quiche,
one pie beef,
one pie chicken, one green salad. Go, go, go.
Dekko?
Uh-huh!
A customer said
the chicken's dry.
The what's what?
The chicken.
It's dry.
It's a pie.
It's delicious.
Alex, you're in charge.
Don't blow anything up.
All right, which one of you
bollockses thinks my chicken's dry?
You?
You?
Me.
What the hell
are you doing here?
Could you maybe be nice
for just a second?
l did fly
3, miles to get here.
Is Jeremy with you?
What? No! No.
Jeremy and l...
It didn't work out.
Sorry.
J
Well
when my 60 seconds
came around, l realized
l had everything
l ever wanted
but nothing
l really needed.
And l think that
what l need is here.
And l came all this way
to see if maybe you might think so, too.
And if you do...
Well, l don't really
have any plans past that, which is new for me.
So,
Declan O'Callaghan,
and l should probably
learn your middle name,
here is my proposal.
l propose
we not make plans.
l propose we give
this thing a chance
and let it work out
how it works out.
So what do you say?
Do you want to
not make plans with me?
l guess
that's an Irish no.
Mrs. O'Bradycallaghan.
Where the hell
are you going?
You said no.
l didn't say no.
l didn't say anything.
You walked away.
l was getting something.
Really? That was
a good time to go get something?
Well, yeah,
it was, actually.
l was getting this.
You big idiot.
l wouldn't be
holding this ring if it weren't for you.
l reject your proposal.
l don't want to
not make plans with you.
l want to make
plans with you.
You do?
Yeah. l do.
Will you marry me?
In all my life,
l never thought I'd see you down on one knee.
Yeah, it's getting
a bit damp down here, so...
What's it to be,
Anna from Boston?
Yes.
Yes, l will.
I'm so relieved.
For a minute there,
l thought l wasn't
gonna have a place to stay tonight.
What?
You think
you're staying with me?
This might cost you.
Put it on my bill.
Would you
Look at that!
On a Sunday, no less.
It's good luck to get engaged on a Sunday.
And end a journey.
Aye, and dig a well.
Idiot! Do they look like
they're digging a well?
You know what
I'm talking about.
l never know
what you're talking about.
Are you sure
she's gonna make it?
Remember,
she's a classic.
And she's good as new,
even after
some crazy woman tried to push her off the road.
l didn't try to
push her off the road!
l was scraping
cow poo off my shoe
'cause some rude man
wouldn't help me with the cows.
Only because someone
was being pigheaded and couldn't wait.
Shut up.
There you are.
Right.
Where to?
Just drive.
You got it, Bob.
Wait a minute.
Where's Louis?
Louis? He's fine.
Strapped him to the roof.
You strapped him
to the roof? He'll get filthy up there.
Don't worry.
We'll throw him
in the wash. He'll be grand.