Slow down. Park there.
Mr. Yampolsky, you have followed all the rules.
You'll pass your test tomorrow,
I'm sure.
And after you get your license,
I suspect you'll buy the biggest, fastest car
And throw all the rules out of the window.
It is not a joke.
Remember driving is a freedom.
I wish you to enjoy every kind of freedom...
As long as you don't hurt someone.
You promise me?
- Okay, Mr. Singh.
- Mr. Singh Tur.
- Mr. Singh Tur.
- Thank you.
The objective here is to be at a minimum...
Six cars at least from the nearest vehicle in front
You cant help it they charge you once in a while...
Like this little hot dog wants to go by, in a sports car...
But by in large most people run along in about the same speed...
I like to drive in the speed of traffic.
Taxi!
Ted!
Ted!
- You can't run out on me!
- Hudson and Jane. Quick! Quick!
Hold on! Hold on, please.
Go! Go!
- Shit!
- Crazy.
You're just a bastard!
I inform me in a public place so I can't make a scene!
And you thought that would work?
- Hey, cut that out.
- You thought that would work?
- Excuse me, you said Hudson & Jane?
- Yeah, Hudson & Jane.
Is that where she lives?
Oh, you cock-sucker!
Oh, cock-sucker!
- I'm not going home with you, Wendy.
- What?
- After 21 years?
- Yes
- How long have you been lying to me?
- I didn't lie!
- I did not fucking lie!
- I suddenly know anything was wrong?
Now you blind...you blind-side me.
Oh blind-side you?
When did you ever notice anything, Wendy?
On the rare occasion when you look up from your book...
Or your fucking computer
You look...
Right through me like I'm a ghost.
Well, I'm looking through you now and you're a prick.
A prick.
What is she?
Is she one of your students?
Oh...
That's as good as a yes.
Goddamn you!
- Alright, pull over, let me out of here.
- No no.
- I'm gone!
- No please! Just...
Just come home and we'll talk...
No, I'm done, I'm done. It's not gonna do any goo
Stop it!
Take it to 112...
Shut up!
Shut the fuck up!
- Take her to 112 West 98th Street.
- Yes sir.
You just don't understand.
Right here.
Go, go.
I don't understand.
I don't understand.
I don't understand...
We are here.
Number 112.
No, please.
He paid me already.
- Thank you.
- Yes.
Good morning.
Good morning.
Preet.
Preet.
Hey, Uncle D.
I got another job,
Big renovation this time at least four weeks.
Where did you get that?
This one?
I've paid for it..?
Preet, you must save your money.
Uncle D, I must have my music.
Turn that aroundl,
if you can't wear it properly, put on the Dastan.
Uncle D, I think it's a little past your bedtime.
Tasha?
- Hey!
- Hi Mom.
- Hi.
- Hi.
They don't use any chemical sprays or fertilizers.
I just love being out on the tractor.
- Tractor?
- A big red tractor.
I love the air and smells and...
And the dirt.
Growing up in the city,
I always thought of dirt as grime,you know?.
But this is like alive,
It's nourishing, it's rich, I just wanna...
I want to eat it.
Nostalgia de la boue .
I want to skip my first semester...
So I can save for the harvest.
Did you ask your father?
He said to ask you.
No one stands to reason.
I'm the one paying your tuition.
- True.
- You know, do what you want.
Vermont suits you.
You look dangerously...
Dangerously healthy.
Why don't you come stay with me?.
They can put you up on the farm...
You can write there.
The train is on the other side of the state.
- So?
- And I, of course can't drive.
- Why not?
- Why can't you drive?
- I don't understand.
- Let's not start that again.
It is so easy.
Let's not get into that right now.
And even if I could, it's too far and...
It's out in the middle of nowhere,
There's no internet.
But, don't you want to get away?
There's so many memories in this house...
Tasha...
When I think of you and dad not together...
It makes me so upset.
I'm fine.
And you're here all alone...
In this house.
Please don't be upset.
I thought you'd be upset.
We've weathered this before.
Every seven years, it comes over him.
He gets restless and does something juvenile.
So at 21 years
We're on our third itch.
Or it's male menopause.
Instead of buying motorcycle,
Daddy decided to give adultery spin.
Tell you what..?
When he comes home,
We'll drive up to visit.
You'll drive up to visit.
Dad is not coming home.
Go look upstairs,
He didn't take any of his books.
What does that tell you?
Go look.
He said he filed for separation yesterday.
And he uses you to deliver that message?
I hope she knows she'll have to pay for his keep...
Because he is a loser.
In 20 years he couldn't get tenure.
How anyone...besides me,
Could consider him romantic material is...
It's stupefying.
So you are upset.
No, I'm not.
I'm disgusted.
You're gonna stay for dinner?
- Well, I...
- Yeah?
I...
I actually,
I told Dad that I would eat with him.
So this is just a visit?
- Stopping by to see if Mom is a basket case?
- No.
And then run that message back to him.
Thanks. You can go now.
- Mom... that's...
- No, no....I mean it....
I have work to do.
I just got here.
Please don't walk away.
Please.
What?
You left this in my cab.
Okay.
Oh, just a minute , just...
I think...
Oh!
What painful.
Let me get you some real money.
I don't want anything, I like to help.
You like to help?
That is impossible.
You can't be from New York.
Yes, I am.
From Queens.
That's not really New York, but...
You're very kind and I thank you.
Are you sure I can't give you something?
Do you have a card?
Hi, this is Tasha.
Please leave me a message and I'll call you back.
Tash, it's me.
I'm sorry about what I said.
And you're right, I need a change of scenery.
So guess what?
I'm gonna get my license, buy a new car...
And drive up and see you.
So we can eat some dirt together.
Love you.
Alright, we all ready?
15 seconds.
I heard about you and Ted.
I'm really sorry.
Heard what exactly?
- That you and he...
- No, no, no.
We're just taking a breather,
For God's sake.
And joining me today's topic are critics necessary...
Are three of out most influential critics:
- Film reviewer J. Howard Mintz.
- Hello.
Paige Belknap, who covers art...
And, of course, book critic Wendy Shields.
Let's start with you, Wendy.
- It's good to have you back.
- Always a pleasure.
Wendy, no child dreams of being a literary critic.
What drew you to it?
No child?
I...I wanted anything to do with words.
I...I grew up in a household that was far from peaceful...
And books just floated me away...
I...It's part of my job to review bad books too..
But good ones still carry me off.
What are the current authors you enjoy reviewing?
Many. But...
Martin Amis,
Toni Morrison,
Delia Krauss.
I especially loved her short stories.
You know, the magazine has published most of them.
What?
Nobody likes Delia Krauss?
Well I do.
Delia Krauss. Whore.
- We thought you knew.
- No.
I thought it was one of Ted's students.
Now I get it.
She was right in the Residence last year.
He ploughed through half of faculty.
We said that was thrown everything that moved.
Maybe won't last.
- He'll be back.
- Oh, God...
Every time I open up the magazine...
I'm gonna have to see your name.
Are you headed to the office?
- Let's head back to the office.
- No, no I...
I think I'm gonna...
I'm gonna work from home for a while.
Who is it?
Darwan Singh Tur,
For your driving lessons please.
Oh, God!
I completely forgot.
Anyway, I've changed my mind about lessons.
Why, if I may ask?
I am really sorry.
I will pay you for today.
Don't pay me,
But I will ask a small favor from you.
Of course.
Come, sit in the car, the driver's seat.
So you'll get used to it.
- I'm in the middle of work.
- Let me do my job just a little.
Okay.
Seat belt first.
First position turns on the electrical systems...
Second position...
Next you have three mirrors:
Rear view, left and right.
I don't need to learn this.
My husband drives, so...
I never learned to cook because,
I thought my mother...
Would always be there to cook for me.
Then there was half a world between us.
And so I made my own food.
Your point?
No point.
Turn your head,
So you can see the blind spot.
And left shoulder.
Turn your head.
Left shoulder,
So you can see the blind spot.
Now put on your left signal.
Shit.
Other side of the wheel.
Put on your left signal.
Now turn your wheelall the way to the left.
Put on the brake.
Now you are in drive.
Now the gas pedal.
What happened?
- We're moving.
- That's good.
I think I do not like this.
Well, you have to go forward now,
Because I haven't taught you how to back up.
Now check your mirrors again,
Turn your head.
Oh, Jesus!
Nothing will happen.
I'm always here with the other brake.
Now press your foot.
Press the pedal gradually.
Down and release.
Press the pedal gradually.
Straighten your wheel.
Hey! Ma ji (meaning mother) sent another photo.
Ah! She looks sour.
- She would complain a lot.
- What? You didn't even look.
You know, every single time you find a reason to not like her.
I don't know how many more years it's gonna be...
Until they're all gone and you're left alone.
You think in your that you're still in prison.
Be quiet!
And you'll never speak to me like that again!
You were a skinny scared boy when I took you in.
I promised your Mom to help you.
Now you can be cheek and disrespect.
And you was stinky too,
Smeared all over with garlic paste?
Well, they said it would keep the rattle snakes away, in the desert.
So one of the border guards didn't smell you coming.
- Hey! It worked, right?
- What!
You teach us how to see everything.
Youe eyes, it goes from sidewalk to sidewalk...
And one block ahead.
You see the markings on the roads,
The lights...
Read the signs.
- There's too many to read.
- It comes with time.
Beware of living as well as non-living things...
When you see a person ahead of you,
Try to guess what they'll do next.
Smoothly adjust.
The driver's biggest problem is everyone else.
You can't always trust people...
To behave properly.
Ain't that the truth.
It is red light.
I mean isn't it strange that red has come to mean "stop" and "danger"....
It strikes to me that stopping is when you're safe.
- And going is dangerous.
- Do not talk, Wendy.
When you talk, you don't see.
Watch the light.
Ted!
Don't you love me anymore?
No.
But why?
How did I fail you?
What should I have done?
- Pay attention.
- Oh God!
Oh my God!
Why didn't you see her?
Were you wandering?
I'm never gonna be good at this.
- Never.
- Every time it will get easier.
Now drive on.
Can you please drive me home?
No, you will do it.
I will help.
Take the wheel, press the pedal.
She's not young...
But she can still have one or two children.
So why hasn't she been married?
She was engaged once,
But the police shot her fiance...
Just like they did to our Sameer.
Then her father was ill for a long time
And needed her at home...
Now he is dead,
She has nowhere to go.
She is perfect.
She is the best one for you, Darwan.
And very nice looking.
Did you see the photo?
Yes, but can I talk to her
And see her like we're doing?
She won't come to the phone.
she thinks you'll see she's too old.
She says he won't like me.
No he won't , Maji.
I'll think about it.
Rasbir, please take the phone to the window...
Show me the streets, the sun, the sky, everything.
Bahje...
It is night time here.
You can't see anything.
Well Hallelujah, sis.
You know? It's about time you started driving.
I'm just doing it for Tasha,
Not because I need to.
- I know.
- Debbie...
You have to drive.
You live in the suburbs.
Here we have things called subways and...and taxis...
And buses.
I also used to have a husband who drove.
Oh! Ted.
You know? It doesn't surprise me.
On my street alone,
There've been 3 divorces caused by screwing around.
Well, Greenwich.
Look, I don't understand...
These men who cheat on their wives...
How do they live with themselves?
It's like pissing in the pool.
Okay, maybe nobody saw you do it,
But you know the "yellow" is in there...
And you got to swim around it
Pretending that it is clean.
Where do they find all these skanks?
Is there a vending machine?
They like them young...
Can mold them however they like...
Teach them tricks.
Like waking them up every morning with a nice blowjob.
Maybe that's all Ted ever really wanted.
Honestly?
It is Nirvana for them.
Then why do we do it?
It's way too much work.
Oh my God,
Why do you think they call it a "job"?
Oh my God...
No.
This mouth is retired....
Okay? With a full pension.
High Five.
He get over-excited.
Calm down.
High Five.
He wants support?
Or 25% share of your income.
He claims he supported you while you pursued your career.
I know. I know.
This is the man who was jealous of my career.
He criticized everything I did...
To undermine me.
Wendy, is normal.
Each side asks for the outrageous
And they meet somewhere in the middle
Don't take it personally.
Just give him everything.
If he agrees to be castrated.
He'll let you stay in the house if you buy him out.
I can't possibly afford that.
Or split 50-50 if you sell.
I have to move out?
I am that house.
It is like asking me to move out of me.
- Maybe it's too big now.
- I can't believe this.
It's where we raised Tasha.
It's where we were happy.
It's...
Okay.
That's where we were idiots...
And we squandered our marriage...
And we never made love, and we should have...
And we never fucked, but we should have...
And we read, read and read...
And went totally fucking blind.
I want my house.
I want my house.
I want my home, I want my...
I want my house.
I want my house!
I want my house!
We've got another guy coming up right now...
Probably.....
ICE.
Who are you?
Darwan Singh Tur,
American citizen.
- Let's see your papers.
- Yes sir.
What have we got?
How come they let you in, Darwan?
Political asylum, sir.
In 2000.
You got in under the wire.
Preet!
Preet!
Oh my God...!
Preet!
Preet? Preet Preet Preet.
Preet.
Oh, my God...!
- I'm sick of this.
- Take your time, Take your time, they're gone.
Really thought they had me this time.
Oh! They took Teji and Raam.
Thank God you're safe.
Only till next time.
I will find us another place.
No.
I'm gonna live with my girlfriend in Chinatown.
You have a girlfriend?
They won't look for me if I'm with her.
She is Jewish.
Come on, Uncle D,
You had to know that I was going sometime, right?
This is a very poor decision.
My sister will blame me.
Don't worry, I'll just tell her: "Maji,
This is America,
And I can do what I want...
As long as they don't ask for my papers.
Point your eyes at the middle of the lane, the same as a gun.
Your peripheral vision sees all the rest.
Oh! Osama.
I thought we killed you.
Shut up!
Assholes!
Assholes! Shut the fu...
- Does that happen to you often?
- Everyday.
People try to push your buttons...
But you don't engage with them, especially when you drive.
Now... you're on top of a cross-walk...
Next time...
Stop where you can see the lines.
You have the light.
Get out of the way, asshole.
Oh my God, God...
Damn it!
Don't lean on the horn.
It's not a boat. Just a short tap.
I just...I don't understand why men have to do that!
Wag their balls in your face?
I think it's time to discuss road rage.
You must learn to be calm and relaxed.
Not only to drive,
But also in your life as well.
And how do you manage that?
Prayer helps me.
I pray everyday.
I'm mad at your God too.
I'm mad at your God too.
I'm sorry.
Tell me why you want to drive?
To go somewhere else.
And how do you want to get there?
How?
Do you want to arrive in one piece or two pieces or three?
Don't patronize me.
Look at me.
It doesn't matter what is going on in your life out there.
You must shut it out.
When you are here,
When you are at the wheel of a car...
This is all there is.
Your life right now.
So, take care of it, please.
Hi.
Come on in.
You look fine.
Therefore I am.
So many choices when you are single.
Do I get a one bedroom or a two?
Or.. a high-rise or a low-rise?
We're looking for a place in Nyack.
- That's a long commute
- I enjoy the drive.
You're leaving me "The Joy of Sex"?
Nah! It's yours.
I gave it to you for Valentine's Day.
I don't remember reading it.
Well, you put it in a drawer.
Well, hand it here,
Let's see if there is anything we didn't cover.
The missionary.
Check.
Standing.
Check.
Rear entry.
Check.
Okay, I guess that's it.
According .
Tasha was what? Six?
She was eight.
Okay.
This is hard.
Yes.
I am finding I can do hard things.
- I'm learning to drive, you know?
- Oh, that's a scary thought.
I can drive,
I can keep a clean house and...
- Hey...
- I can wear a tight skirt.
I can make cherry pop.
- And I can make you love me again.
- No.
I can...I can...
I can give you what you need.
Wendy, come on now.
This... This just isn't you.
Since when...?
Since when did you become a lap dancer?
Oh my God...
Sweet heart. Don't.
Nice.
Hold on.
Holy shit!
I'm here, I'm here,
I'm coming! I'm coming!
- I don't wanna hear it, pal.
- Sorry, Sorry.
My wife just kicked me out.
And I got a bunch of shit in the car.
- Not my problem. Read the sign.
- Dude, come on please, man.
- You know the drill.
- You can't take it!
Damn!
She's not that kind of a woman.
And how do you know?
She would be modest, I think.
This would shock her.
Trust me, Uncle D.
- All women, they want these things.
- No no.
I don't want her to get the idea that this is how I think of her.
It's disrespectful.
Oh come on. It's bad enough that you don't understand women.
But you don't even understand yourself.
Just look at it.
Preet.
It's distracting.
Huh! Distracting.
Oh Shit. Sorry.
No, no.
No, no.
Okay.
I'm lost.
Wendy, how do you know if you put in...
Enough salt and pepper when you're making a stew?
- You taste it.
- Right.
So what do you do when you lose track of which way the car is pointing...
When you parallel park?
You taste it?
You just let the car move back a tiny bit...
And see which way it goes.
Taste the direction.
- And then you adjust the seasoning?
- Right.
You adjust a little bit and a little bit.
And now I've made myself hungry.
I'll go home and make myself a curry.
You look very nice today.
Thank you.
Wendy, what does a women like for a gift?
I do not know. Candy or...
Flowers.
Speaking for myself...
A book of poetry.
My husband gave me that on our first date...
And on every anniversary.
He'd mark a certain love poem...
And he ask me to read it...
As he lay his head on my lap.
It was a perfect gift.
It's a fine idea.
What about you?
What present you like?
A check, of course!
- Bye.
- Next time.
Hi.
How can you claim the Moroccan lamp
as a pre-marital asset?
We bought it together, Ted!
Hold on.
Hear that?
That's me tearing it in half....
So now you can shove it up both your ass,
And your lawyer's.
Are they ever gonna fix the air conditioning?
I will take you some place cooler.
Oh my God!
- It is a bridge.
- Yes
Today you are going over a bridge.
I can't. I have a fear of heights.
We'll take it slowly. Now go straight.
Please! Please don't make me do this!
Wendy you must move.
Why do you force me to do this, Darwan?
Why?
Because I know what you can do better than you.
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Do not look down,
Focus on the middle of the lane.
It is just another road,
Only it's in the sky.
- Don't look down, don't look down.
- It's terrifying.
Yes terryfying!
Fear is good.
When you are afraid, you pay more attention.
No more tuning out, Wendy.
We got a lot of merging to do.
Thank you.
That was a very nice man.
Very nice man.
You are not breathing properly.
You're hyperventilating.
Breathe.
Now we are on land.
Okay.
You can let go the death grip now.
Congratulations.
Queens is part of New York too.
We don't have skyscrapers, and
Times Square and Trump palaces but...
We only have more people.
Many different people. Families.
You have family here too?
Just my nephew.
My sister's son.
She lives in Punjab.
- Your parents?
- They are dead.
I didn't tell you to turn.
I'm showing you my Queens.
This is where I grew up.
You're from Queens.
You played a good joke on me.
You...
My dad used to sit in his car,
Just like that,
Listening to the game and the radio...
Whenever my mother kicked him out of the house
which was pretty often.
He took off one day.
Never saw him again.
My sister and I were left alone to raise our mother.
I can't believe you got me here.
I'm allergic to Queens.
There will be a reward.
Wait here.
Hi, Dad...
Here I am sitting in your seat.
Mets are playing Arizona.
It's about time you took the wheel.
The car is the greatest thing in the history of human invention.
Forget your house, you can live in here.
Sleeping in the back.
Heat up a TV dinner on the engine.
Here's your shower.
Pee in the gas tank.
And when the spirit moves you
you just drive away.
Like you drove away?
And never came back.
Here is your reward.
You have a masters?
I was university professor,
like my father.
Why do you teach driving?
For a better job, I would have to...
Take off my turban, shave off my beard.
People think I look dangerous.
But this is how I know who I am.
And here it is too easy to forget.
Do you ever go back to visit?
I can never go home to India.
It's part of political asylum.
I couldn't get to see my dad before he passed away last year.
I miss my mother's funeral too,
Because then I was in prison there.
- Why?
- For nothing.
For being a Sikh.
The police had already killed my brother.
They said it he was a terrorist...
And they had to shoot him because he ambushed them,
But it was a lie.
Then they punished the rest of the family.
All of us were tortured.
My father, my uncle, even my mother.
They left my sister alone,
because she was too young.
Back then...
There was no justice for Sikhs.
How long were you in prison?
Long time.
But here....
Is the ocean.
Punjab is nowhere near water.
It's very late.
I have time.
We have to get you back to Manhattan.
Oh my God...!
Put on your lights.
I do not know where it is.
It's right there.
- Oh my God!
- You have the light. Go now!
Foot off the brake! Go! Go!
Why did you stop?
I..I don't know.
Oh! My dear God.
You gotta be kidding me.
Son of a bitch.
I just got through paying for this car.
You stupid fucking Arab.
- Stop.
- It was my student.
What's the matter with you?
Get off the fucking road.
Stop.
- Fucking motherfucker.
- Stop
- What the fuck, man?
Shit.
- Fuck that shit!
- Cops are here.
- They should take this fucking asshole...
- Alright, what happened?
He stopped for no reason.
No reason at all.
It was my student driver, sir.
- Where you from?
- Richmond Hill.
Yeah, but where you from?
India.
- You got papers?
- I am an American citizen.
Excuse me, officer.
- I was driving and I caused the accident.
- I understand, ma'am.
I'm gonna say two words:
Racial profiling.
- Were they harassing you?
- Wendy,stay in the car.
- Listen ma'am, it was a no fault accident, okay?
- Okay.
- I was the driver!
- Get back in the car.
Everybody get back in the car.
Are you okay?
Put on your seat belt.
Is...is everything okay?
What is okay?
I've a car dashed up to hell!
My boss angry at me!
- I'll pay to have it fixed.
- You pay nothing.
The school has insurance.
But the$ 500 deductable, who pays that?
I do.
Do you know how much I have to work for $500?
Tie it at the back.
I can give you that.
I cannot take your money.
Thta is not how I am.
What were you doing?
All you had to do was drive straight...
Through an intersection, everything is clear.
And you stop.
My mind wandered...
just for a second.
Bad things can happen, just for a second...
You can lose everything if you don't get another try.
- I was thinking.
- I don't have time to take you home now.
I have to meet somebody at the airport.
And I'm very late.
- Yes, oh thank you sir.
- Drive safe, sir.
- Yes sir.
Please.
Wait here.
Jasleen?
Darwan?
Hello, do you not seen the sign?
Never mind.
Here is for you.
Open it, please, please. Open.
These are beautiful poems for you to read.
William Wordsworth.
Thank you, Mister.
No Mister.
We will speak only English now.
You will learn fast.
Thank you.
I've not tasted these in 12 or 13 years.
So...
No, no.
Come.
We've had a little accident.
That's my student, Wendy.
Wendy, this is Jasleen.
Hi.
Hi.
Can I help?
Oh my goodness.
I'm gonna get in the back.
Cannot put these in the trunk because it's full of rain,
it's flooded.
I got it.
No, I want...
- Be carefully.
- No problem, it will be safe.
Hang this on the hook.
My dress.
It is our wedding dress.
You're getting married?
Speak slowly so she could understand.
You get... A... marry?
Yes. Tomorrow.
We are very happy.
Oh! You two?
Hurry.
- You two?
- Yes
Can you imagine how embarrassing this is?
I look like a drowned dog.
I have to pick her up in a pile of junk.
This is not how our first meeting was to be.
We have to take Wendy home first.
Look, here is America.
Excuse me...
You've never, you've never met her?
She's from a village near where I grew up.
My sister picked her out for me.
If my sister picked out a husband for me,
he would be some dick-less.
Yes, you are better off...
That is why you're alone and crazy.
- Just drop me at the subway.
- No, you are my guest.
That is not how we are.
We do everything for our guests before we think of ourselves.
That is the Sikh way.
Uncle D, now that you're married, a double date in Chinatown?
Cheeky.
Oh yes!
I'll take that as a yes.
If you want a lot of light,
You gotta sacrifice your space.
Or...
Buy a bigger place...
And you sacrifice your light.
Oh excuse me, I gotta take this call.
Did they take the offer?
No?
They want all the furniture?
Well, I don't know,
The mother just died.
It all belong to her.
I don't know how she's gonna fell about that.
You know how people are when people die.
I don't know. I don't know.
I do not know whether she's gonna want it.
Alright.
You want to take a look
see at the kitchen?
- Sure.
- Come on.
Dear Wendy, I'm very sorry
for my behavior during our last lesson.
The car is fixed now, it runs very well.
But where is the driver.
You made me wait.
Punishing me.
Maybe.
Well,
I am happy we will finish what we started.
I will not let you to fail your license, Wendy.
What was the wedding?
It was a very, very beautiful ceremony.
It says: "When a man marries a woman,
they become one spirit...
We think and feel the same."
There is no differences between us.
- YOu don't mention love?
- Of course.
Love is the one route to God.
God doesn't want anyone to be alone.
Seat belt first.
So what's it like waking up
married to a complete stranger?
I think you don't approve our arranged marriage.
Check your mirrors.
I'll try to explain.
We hold our families very close.
They know you better than anyone else.
They are more objective
about who is the right person for you.
If left to your own decisions,
you could pick the wrong one.
You choose to your ego.
I do not know what I believed about marriage...
Except that it would always be there.
Right signal.
More tomatoes...
Make a nicer color.
I'm not having tomatoes.
Jasleen,
I give you money, you can go out...
And buy tomatoes.
I not know where.
Just walk down the street.
There are plenty of stores.
A little too much ghee.
I know much.
If you don't have conversation with people outside,
how're you gonna pick up English?
TV.
Huh?
Then tell me what you learned today.
That is Spanish, not English.
Oh, here she is.
Sorry, I'm late.
My sister is never on time, so...
Wendy, this is Peter.
He is a squash buddy of mine.
He annihilates me once a week.
Very pleased to meet you.
Hello.
How does a '99 Meursault sound everyone?
- That sounds great.
- Exquisite. Sounds expensive.
C & apos; is a premier cru suprieur
Very good. . Merci
Merci .
You speak French?
Etudie to Paris .
Formidable .
You kept your accent.
I've got a full reserve for Monday night.
What's it gonna be?
I told you not to do this...!
So? He's a Banker.
He's also a opera lover and quite a gourmet.
What is his political affiliation?
I have no idea.
Listen to me! He was vary hard to wrinkle for the $%^#.
You know? A lot of women are after him.
Honey! It is really time for you to get back in the saddle.
Oh, and roll in the hay?
I love these dude-ranch-metaphors
coming a Connecticut matron.
Oh please.
You know? You could use a little
hormone upgrade yourself.
You know what I'm talking about.
You don't understand how much I envy you.
I love nothing more than to live a life of a mind.
I'd like something to take my mind off my mind.
That's why I do yoga, meditate.
- Tantric Yoga.
- I do sedatives.
I knew you'd be clever.
I love your reviews.
By the end I always feel like I've read the book.
Well, that accounts for the drop in sales.
I read a lot of e-books.
Don love'em all the time
I like to hold the book in my hand.
Well, me too.
It has to be the right book...though.
I love the smell,
the feel...of the paper.
Here.
Try my blood orange sorbet.
Isn't that remarkable?
Are you ever going to cum?
I've cum a few times.
I just don't ejaculate.
I do tantric sex.
Can we stop, please?
Of course.
Jesus...!
Oh, Jesus!
I wanted to make you cum again.
I'm...
I'm...
I'm too tired.
But thank you.
So...
When were you planning on ejaculating?
I don't know.
Next time maybe.
Next time after that.
What are you doing Thursday?
I can ejaculate on Thursday.
I have a driving lesson.
I see you're more comfortable now at high speeds.
You're very quiet today.
- Just focusing.
- That's good.
Pass him.
Put on your signal to $%3 the cars.
Very good.
You only need a little courage...
And a little gas.
"A perfect woman,
nobly planned...
to warn, to comfort
and command...
And yet her spirit still in bright...
With something of angelic light."
Do you like that?
Now...
You read me this one...
To me.
Don't tell me you can't read English.
When I was 14...
My baba took me out of school.
My God!
No thing I know is good for you.
Calm down.
What do you want?
What...What do I do?
You don't go out,
you don't try to learn anything about America.
You should be curious,
you have a mind.
Like Wendy!
Wendy, Wendy, Wendy, Wendy!
Why're we talk about Wendy?
Jasleen, tell me why you're so unhappy.
You are never here.
Where?
Where? Where all the time?
- I' m working.
I want a good life for our family.
You don't want with me.
I'm stupid.
I cook too much ghee.
If you accumulate more than 15 points...
You fail.
Now, what are the things in the
test worth 15 points?
- Parallel parking...
- What else?
- Broken U-turn...
- What else?
- Going too fast.
- Or too slow. What else?
Not observing the right of way.
If you fail any one of these 15 pointers,
you automatically fail your test.
Are you sure I'm ready?
Wendy, don't forget what I know:
You're a very determined woman.
Now tell me, tell me.
tell me, tell me.
What kind of a car are you going to buy?
Something cheap.
My divorce is costing me a fortune.
- Next.
- Oh, God, God, Darwan...
- Next.
- If you get nervous, just listen.
You'll hear my voice telling you what to do.
Next!
Hello. My name is Wendy.
Start the car.
Pull away from the curb, please.
60 points.
I went blank.
Why did I ever think I could drive?
Wendy, your next test will go better.
I don't belong in the road.
I'm only trained to do one trick:
Ignore everything and everybody
around me.
You know there is a reason some people are alone...
Because they deserve to be.
I ignored my husband.
I ignored my daughter.
No wonder he cheated on me.
I openly cheated on them.
Because my first and foremost love was...
For words.
I wrapped myself on them.
And then I look at you...
There is a thousand things in this world
to divide two people...
And you and Jasleen
manage to be one spirit.
Just tell me:
If she ever disappointed you, if she ever...
Fell short in some way,
Would you cheat on her?
No, I would never.
Darwan, you're a good man.
You give me faith.
Thank you.
No, I...I don't want this anymore.
I don't know how to talk to her.
She's not educated.
We don't like the same things at all.
She's...
She's scared of America.
She's scared of me, she hides.
You know words, Wendy.
What do I say?
That you...
You never stop trying.
That you fight for her.
Everyday you tread across the divide.
Because she's worth that.
Is this what you want to hear from him?
Not words.
You know what I miss?
The way he touch my face.
Just...
Holding my face between his two hands.
Can you come inside?
I left my checkbook.
You can pay me next time.
No next time.
I' done with driving.
You shouldn't give up,
you only need a little more practice.
No, I don't have it in me, Darwan.
I'm sorry.
You make me say goodbye.
I guess.
Yeah.
Thank you.
You did your best.
Not enough.
Goodbye, Wendy.
What is this...?
I can't read that!
Sorry?
You see the picture, you know what she wants.
No, ma'am.
You work here,
and you don't know where the sanitary napkin?
Aisle-five.
Oh! They are so rude here.
You have to demand your respect in America.
Where are you from?
- Dadiala.
- Ah, my uncle lives there.
Why don't I see you in temple, darling?
How many days have you been married?
Enough.
Mata.
There he is.
Mata, hello.
Darwan Singh,
why do you shut up this pearl in the house?
I assure you
she is free to go anywhere.
What a husband?
Leaving you alone all the time.
Don't worry, darling.
We'll make our own fun here.
We don't need him.
- I'll make dinner.
- Never mind, Jasleen.
Never mind.
Enjoy your new friends.
I'll pick up something to eat.
That is right.
Leave her to us.
You won't recognize her
when we're done with her.
- I'm going.
- Go, go, you're ruining our fun.
Arghh!
So much stuff!
Believe me!
I threw out tonnes.
Tasha, Thank you for helping,
but I think you have to get back on the road.
You have a long drive.
I don't think I'm gonna go back.
- What?
- I love farming, but I...
Mainly was there to be with this guy, and now...
Suddenly, he's decided to go back to Dartmouth.
So I'm alone and my friends are gone.
I'm just so embarrassed.
Come here.
Can I stay here with you?
Oh, I would love that.
I would so love that.
But you can't.
Tasha, if live in here,
You would be in a spirit of failure
and that's deadly.
You have to see this through,
You have to go back to Vermont
and harvest your ass off.
- I'll come visit you, I promise.
- Okay.
- It's too far.
- I'm gonna find way, I'm gonna...
I'm gonna find a way.
Hi, its Wendy.
I'm gonna try again.
Yes.
How is Jasleen?
She's very busy.
She goes to school now, taking classes.
So, how do you like your your new apartment?
It's an adjustment,
I'm tasting it.
- You're so quiet.
- You're not doing anything wrong.
Played it chicken meat.
That looks like a pass.
- I wish you had been there.
- I was there.
Thank you, ma'am.
I was there.
Thank you.
I was there.
Did you hear my voice telling you what to do?
No.
- You didn't need it.
- No.
Oh my God....
I do not know...
I just...I wasn't as nervous this time.
- That's so amazing.
- Yeah.
- So happy for you,Mom.
- Thanks.
So, when are you gonna drive up and see me?
I'm coming soon.
- It's an classic American car.
- It's a good price.
Can't go wrong with that.
You could drive this one right off the lot today...
If...you know, If you're okay with the color.
I never thought about red, but...
Red is happy, it's...
What the bride wears for her wedding in India.
Yes, but what does it say about me?
I'm a hot little number?...
Hussie on board?
It says...
"Don't fuck with me."
Alright now, who'd be purchasing the car today,
sir you or your wife?
Ah...(CLEARS THROAT)
She is not my wife.
But... Whose name will the car be under, sir?
Really, we're not together.
Honey, it's okay.
- I'm buying it.
- Alright.
- Congratulations.
- Oh, thanks.
How do I...?
How do I get home?
You can follow me to the bridge.
Darwan...
Darwan, thank you.
I'll be hearing your voice in my head...
For a long time.
That would please me.
Well...
Here I go.
Wendy...
Could we go...?
Somewhere we can celebrate, a dinner, please?
Or just a coffee sometime, just to chat.
- I can't.
- I want to see you again.
I know.
The trouble is...
What?
What?
You're a good man.
You are my faith.
Wendy...
Seat belt first.
Darwan.
I didn't expect you.
Jasleen,
Maybe I would not work at night anymore.
Would you like that?
Yes.