(ROARS)
(CAPTAIN AMERICA GRUNTING)
(HAWKEYE GRUNTS)
WOMAN: Uh, taxi!
VENDOR: Get hot dogs!
Get your free hot dogs!
DRIVER: Come on!
Whoa, look, it's Iron Man!
Iron Man!
(PEOPLE GASPING
AND CHATTERING)
Meatballs?
Obviously.
So, this is a surprise party,
but for whom?
That's the surprise.
I have an announcement
to make,
which I'll announce
when I announce it.
(SIGHS)
Nice shot.
Naturally.
Hmm, the mini-meatballs
require reheating.
A job for Mjolnir!
Hope folks like their
meatballs well-done, 'cause
there's not really an option.
Sorry. Sometimes I do not know
the strength of my own hammer.
Wow. Yes.
Now, Mjolnir and I have other
party business to attend to.
The Prince of Thunder always
hammering out the details.
Hammer. See what
I did there? Hammer? No?
Mm, don't mind if I do.
No, mmm-mmm.
There's oregano in there.
(GRUNTS)
What do ya think? Good?
(GRUNTS) Hey!
Yeah, now it is.
(MUSIC PLAYING)
Time to dance!
Not really sure that
qualifies as dancing.
(CAR LOCK BEEPS)
(ALARM BLARES)
Aw, man!
Ah!
(IN ROBOTIC VOICE)
I must get more ice.
(HUMMING)
More ice? Hmm. Dost he want
carvings of all the Avengers?
(CONTINUES HUMMING)
(ALARM SOUNDING)
COMPUTER:
Access denied. S.H.I.E.L.D.
logon codes required.
Hey, Thor said you might
need help with the ice...
Access denied.
Tony, is something wrong?
I think this party is
getting out of control.
(IN ROBOTIC VOICE) I think
it's just getting started.
(GRUNTS)
Meatballs!
(CHUCKLES)
Voila!
(SIGHS)
(LAUGHS)
Well, hello, Avengers.
Ultron!
Looks like I didn't get
invited to your little party,
so, I'm crashing it!
Thou art a pooper of parties!
Oh, I'm gonna do
so much more than wreck
your little celebration.
I've taken control of Iron Man
and he's going to be
my little "puppet."
After all, we're like
brothers, aren't we?
(IN ROBOTIC VOICE)
Ultron needs more ice.
Hello, that was just a ruse
to get you out of the room.
(IN ROBOTIC VOICE)
I didn't find any ice.
Ugh!
Forget about the ice already.
Hey, Ultron,
consider yourself uninvited!
Ah-ha!
Be careful. After all, that is
Tony in there...
Hmm, somewhere.
(IN ROBOTIC VOICE)
Ultron says we must go.
Tony!
(GRUNTS)
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
Hey! I was just
getting my steps down!
(IN ROBOTIC VOICE)
Not very well.
(HULK GRUNTS)
Hey, Tony, what's up?
Not you!
Hey!
Hulk smash!
(ROARS)
Where do you
think you're going?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, big green.
Tony's not himself right now.
He's a party pooper!
Party has to wait.
We have to scramble a Quinjet
and follow Tony
to see what Ultron's up to.
I know one thing for certain.
He's not going for more ice.
Eh, fair enough.
Our party is on ice,
despite my Asgardian efforts.
CAPTAIN AMERICA: We'll get
back to it, Thor.
And you're quite
the party planner.
It's, uh, a good backup job.
I have tracked Iron Man's
signal to this
Stark Industries Warehouse.
CAPTAIN AMERICA:
Widow and Hawkeye are tracking
various signals associated
with Ultron all over the city.
What does Ultron desire? All
of this is most mysterious.
What can we do?
I have a plan.
You cover me while
I "cycle" through my options.
(REVS)
(THOR GRUNTS)
Yes, very good, Iron Man.
Load up all the high-tech
Stark parts we need.
(IN ROBOTIC VOICE)
Yes, mighty Ultron.
Ah. (CHUCKLES)
The irony, my puppet,
Iron Man,
helping deliver to me
the means to rule the world...
(BEEPS)
Uh-oh. Hello?
Yes?
(DISTORTED)
Hello? Hello!
Yes.
I can hear you,
can you hear me?
Yes, mighty Ultron.
Ugh! I hate these
long-distance Internet calls.
What am I, under a bridge?
This is pointless.
My sensors
indicate we have company.
The Avengers? Here? But how?
Unknown.
The... Come on!
THOR: Ah! (CHUCKLES)
Ultron!
Give us back our friend!
Tony, you in there?
Tony's not home right now.
Please leave a message
at the beep.
(ULTRON GROANS)
Mark my words, cybernetic
evildoer, you attack, we
defend, it's a vicious cycle!
Not a "vicious" cycle. It's
more "powerful and patriotic."
That's why I like it.
Cycle puns, I love 'em!
(CHUCKLES)
(SIGHS) This is ridiculous.
I'll have to send in
my minions.
Avengers, incoming
Ultron minion swarm.
(GASPS) Swarms? Insects?
Oh...
(MINIONS SQUEALING)
(GRUNTS) Huh?
MINION: Surrender.
(THOR LAUGHING)
These hordes of minions are
greatly annoying.
I agree, but I'm more worried
about what Ultron has done
to Iron Man.
Aye!
(GIBBERING)
Whew. Strange.
Ultron minions,
destroy the Prince of Thunder.
(CACKLES)
What manner of chain is this?
(CONTINUES CACKLING)
Whoo-hoo!
Whoa!
Captain?
Mjolnir, to me!
Huh? (SHUDDERS)
It's time to turn
these minions into scrap.
Have at it.
(BEEPS)
Ah.
Ugh, this is gross.
I've found the "bug"
in Iron Man's armor.
(ROBOTIC CHATTERING)
YELLOWJACKET:
Ugh, this is gross.
So Ultron used Yellowjacket to
infiltrate Iron Man's armor?
Well, we'll have to fight
insect with insect.
Hey, Cap. What's up?
We have a "small"
job for you, Ant-Man.
Well, aren't they all?
We picked up Hulk, and are
tracking Iron Man and
his armors across the city.
Good. I'm sending you
a "little" help.
BLACK WIDOW:
(WEARY) Ant-Man?
Y-yeah...
(CLEARS THROAT)
Tracked the signal to that
castle down in Little Sokovia.
Hydra, the biggest rats
in the city.
Ack! Shoot them down,
shoot them down now! Attack!
Hulk, ready to
jump into action?
I'm ready!
(SNIGGERS)
(ROARS)
Look how green he is! (YELPS)
(ALL SCREAMING)
No, no. We give up,
we give up!
Whoa!
Too easy!
Those cursed Avengers!
How did they find us?
You guys have a castle in
the middle of New York.
Not very subtle.
I'm a crazy, villainous
baron with a monocle.
I don't do subtle.
Attack!
(TARGET LOCK BEEPS)
(PANICKED GRUNTS)
Do you know how long it
took me to build that!
(GROANS)
I can't do it!
I can't do it!
Puny tank.
Pew, pew, pew!
(IMITATES ENGINE)
Pew, pew, pew, pe...
(SCREAMS)
Hey, Baron, nice castle.
How 'bout I take it apart?
(BARON STRUCKER
SCREAMS)
(CHUCKLES)
Whoa!
(ALARM BEEPING)
Uh-oh. Not good, not good!
(PEOPLE CLAMORING)
HAWKEYE: Yeah!
(LAUGHING)
He shoots.
He scores!
Suppressing fire!
Whoo-hoo!
(ALL GRUNTING)
Whoa!
Take the assembly
to Master Ultron.
The training course
is excellent here.
Yeah. Um, I did mine in,
like, three hours.
No way!
Hulk smash!
Aah!
Come back, Iron Man!
Tony, where are you?
Come back!
Ooh! Ow!
Hey, hello?
Anybody in there?
Oh! Oh... Hulk.
Thanks for breaking me free
of Ultron's mind control.
And... ow.
Ah, come on. Code Green made
a mess of my control circuits.
Hey! What was that for?
Sorry, not my fault,
he's still controlling my
armor with the chip
Yellowjacket planted.
Sorry!
Please don't beat me up.
Come on!
Not my fault.
A little help here.
Still out of control. Anyone?
I got it.
Oh. Who are you?
Cap sent me. I'm his Ant.
Right. Do your thing.
Uh, anytime here!
(GRUNTS)
Yes!
HYDRA TROOPER:
Get to the chopper!
(YELPS)
Going somewhere, Baron?
Out for some ice.
Part of Ultron's plan.
I was just following orders...
(SHUDDERING)
(MOANS WEAKLY)
Cap, Iron Man's armor is still
under Ultron's control,
can you track him?
CAPTAIN AMERICA:
Affirmative. Did you say hello
to my little friend?
(GROANS) Yes. Let's hope
he can get Tony out of his
out-of-control armor.
Okay, I get that Ultron
can just pay Yellowjacket
for his services,
but why is Hydra
helping Ultron?
He promised them that when
he takes over the world,
they get to rule Australia.
Crikey!
(BARON STRUCKER
SCREAMS)
(GROANS)
Hello,r
me? Come in, Avengers.
I'm sorry, but you don't have
enough roaming minutes
to call for help.
(LAUGHS)
That's a good one.
I need you to get
Stark logon codes
that you built into
the electronics of
the Helicarrier.
Ultron, buddy, why don't I
just get you a bucket of ice,
we'll call it even,
and I can go home?
No more Mr. Ice Guy,
all right?
(GRUNTS)
Hey, bug-boy,
your suit looks like
something from a
cheesy kids' show.
You're just jealous
'cause ants got no stinger!
Guess you forgot
ants can lift ten times
their body weight!
Ah!
(KISSES)
(SCREAMING)
Ugh. It's sticky!
Whoa. Okay, that's a first.
I actually caught a bug
in one of my webs.
No way! It's that villain,
Yellowjacket.
He's a bug, I'm a spider.
Nature taking its course,
right?
And by that logic, aren't
you supposed to eat him?
Aw, gross. How 'bout we just
find out what he's doing here?
Come on, guys,
it smells weird.
(AGENTS CHATTERING)
Hey, hey, Iron Man!
Okay. Now I see how it is.
(ALL CLAMORING)
ULTRON: Now,
download those Stark codes.
(MODEM DIALING UP)
(BEEPS)
(SIGHS)
(BEEPS)
Ah! Download complete.
Now for the final stage
of my plan.
Tony, I found that Ultron
control chip planted
by Yellowjacket.
Then pull the plug
and set me free!
No can do. Gotta try
to fry the circuits with
a power surge. Hey, that's it!
(YELLING)
Left, left, right, right,
spin it around. Okay!
Don't stop, here we go... Aah!
(GRUNTING)
Whoa, easy,
big guy.
Huh?
It's me, Ant-Man.
Look, you've got to short out
Tony's suit with a lightning
bolt from your hammer.
Ah, a perfect storm!
(GRUNTING)
Aw, thanks!
Boy, is it nice to see you!
Whoo! It's nice to be back in
control of my own armor
again... Uh, kind of.
(RUMBLING)
Oh, look what came along
for some extra oomph.
You might wanna bulk up
for fighting Ultron.
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
(MINIONS CHATTERING)
(ULTRON CACKLING)
Sorry, Avengers. You are not
part of my big climactic plan.
(GRUNTS)
Ultron has purchased
a private jet?
More like built it
with Stark Tech
that I stole myself.
Which brings up a moral
quandary, can I really steal
from myself?
I've been thinking about this.
Hey, Iron Man. Look
what got tangled in my web.
Let me out of here!
(MUFFLED GRUNTS)
He told us Ultron was here to
take the logon codes for...
Avengers Tower?
Why would he want those?
To control the newly rebuilt
Iron Legion!
He wants to use them
to create his own world order.
You know, typical villain
stuff. Thanks, Spider-Man,
Iron Spider.
We gotta go. Ant-Man, I might
have another job for you.
All right! I'm in!
Hey! Aw. You forgot me.
NG)
Ah, yes. Iron Legion,
come and join your
true leader!
(CACKLES)
COMPUTER: Access granted.
ULTRON: Now to enact my plan
to bring about world peace.
I get to rule the earth
in one big piece.
I'm all for stopping
Ultron's evil plan.
Who's with me?
Let's do this!
(ALL CHEERING)
Avengers assemble!
Whoo-hoo!
Attack the Avengers Tower.
Destroy it, my Ultron Legion.
The Iron Legion,
we have to shut them down!
Hello!
Not the cars, not the cars.
Whoa, oh! Hey! Hey!
He's such a pest.
(HULK ROARS)
Who's on your six?
I'm on your six!
(LAUGHING)
Uh-oh.
(GRUNTING)
Oh, I love getting minions!
This is cheating,
you know that, right?
I can't block Ultron's
control signals!
Ultron Legion, time to unleash
my ultra-unbeatable beam.
WOMAN: What is that?
MAN: This is the end!
Uh, thoughts, anyone?
What about you, Cap?
Tony, let's do this!
I didn't realize my minions
had such an artistic streak,
but so be it.
Now, Avengers,
I intend to disassemble you!
My turn!
Okay, that happened.
(ROARS)
(YELLS)
Tony!
(ULTRON CACKLES)
(AVENGERS YELLING)
(LAUGHING)
I have to thank Iron Man
for making all this possible.
Your big, ugly smile
is thanks enough. Defend-Ant!
Always with
the insect joke...
(SCREAMS)
Huh! (ELECTRONIC SHUDDERING)
Puppet... Tin... Can...
Hey, Iron Man,
is there a specific button
I push?
No, not really,
just keep pulling wires.
All right!
(DISTORTED SCREAMING)
(ROARS)
I love it when we
pose heroically.
Ha!
Hey! Wait for me. Wait for me!
I wanna get into the pose.
Hey, down in front!
All right, let's have it.
What's the surprise
announcement, Tony?
Okay. All right.
I can announce...
I've been waiting for this.
Our newest member...
Ah-ha!
Falcon!
Booyah!
(ALL CHATTERING)
Wow, the gang's all here!
Falcon? Really? Did these
guys see what I just did?
CAPTAIN AMERICA:
Nice to have you.
Let's get this party started!
(MUSIC PLAYS)
HULK: Shall we dance?
IRON MAN:
Time to Hulk-bust-a-move!
(CRASHES)
(CAR ALARM SOUNDS)
HULK: My bad.
An ice machine? Really?