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Lost in Alaska (1952)
Hey! Hey! Hey, don't!
Stop! Don't do that! Wait a minute. Where do you think you're going? Hey, look! That guy is getting ready tojump into the water. After all, I'm a Scout Ranger, and a Scout Ranger never turns his back on the call of duty. A Scout Ranger is trustworthy, loyal, helpful... There he goes! kind, obedient, cheerful, thrifty, brave, clean, reverent, and must do a good deed every day! Don't go away! Don't go away! I'll be right there! What are you doing in that boat? - I don't wanna be saved.! - The man you wanna save is in the water! - I don't wanna be sav... - There he is. Go after him. - I don't wanna be saved. - Go get him! Go ahead. Keep calm! Keep calm! I'm coming! Here I come, sailor, old boy! Keep calm now! All right then. Hey, hey! The boat is leaking! The boat is leaking! I think I got a submarine! Tommy! Go away! Mind your own business! I wanna drown! Come here. Where is he? Where'd he go? Stay there. He'll be right up. There he is. Ha! I got him! I got him! Aw, let me go! Let me go! I got a right to drown myself. It's a free country. Let me go! You wanna catch cold in this water? Help me with... Come here. Get ahold... I... What's the matter? This guy's heavy! He's got lead in his pockets or something. Well, get the lead out! Oh, so that's what you're after... my gold! All right! Take it and let me drown! Hey! No! Hey, Tom, look! It's gold! He's loaded with it! You heard him! Take it! Gold, Tom! I'm gonna put it in my pocket! I've got gold in my pocket! I don't wanna be saved. I wanna drown. Let me go. Tom! But Tom... Come on! Get up! Get up outta there. Let me go! I haven't got anything to live for. Nothing to live for? Man, with all that gold that you've got? Nothing means anything for me without Rosette. Rosette? Who in the world is she? Rosette? Yes. She's the most beautiful creature in the Yukon. She once loved me. Now she hates me. I can't get her out of my mind, no matter how I try. My life's not worth living! Let me go! No, you don't. No, you don't. No, you don't. Take it easy, buddy. Take it easy. Calm down. George? What kind of a guy is he? What are you doing? George.! What are you doing? I'm going down for the third time! Here. Grab that rope. Tie that rope around you. Tie it around you.! P- Pull it up! Pull it up! You got it? Good boy! Let the rope loose! Let it loose! Hold on. Hold on there. Now, get... Come on. Attaboy. Come on. Come on, George. Come on, boy. No, you don't! Now you hold still. I got enough trouble here. Come on. Come on. Come on. Grab yourself. Get outta here. Now, hold on there. Get up here. Up. Get this off! You wanna choke me? W-Where's the gold? In my pants. Where? Where's your pants? Down there. Come on. Let's go. Yeah. Get that gold. Wait a minute Take it easy. Don't lose the gold. I'm gonna take it easy. A little bit, little bit... pull it out. This thing is really loaded. Why keep me in agony? You should have let me drown. Drown? With all this gold? Uh, I mean, NuggetJoe, you've got everything in the world to live for. Huh. The richest gold mine in Alaska. Why, with that kind of money, you can get any girl you want. Why worry about that one girl? I don't want any girl. I want Rosette. How about a little sleep? I'm tired. Stop that! Thinking of yourself. I'm ashamed of you, George. At a time like this here. We've gotta cheer up NuggetJoe. What kind of a Scout Ranger are you? A tired one. Never mind that. We've gotta make NuggetJoe laugh. NuggetJoe, when we get through entertaining you, you'll be walking on the clouds and singing like a bluebird. Come on. Now, let's give him the old routine that we did at the fireman's ball. - This'll kill ya. - Good. I wanna die. Oh, no, no, Joe. Wait till you get a load of this. Uh, George, uh, you know my wife's an angel? You're lucky. Mine's living. Mine's living.! You know, Tom, marriage is just like a poker game. How come? First you hold a pretty hand, you make a pair... Yes. And then you get three of a kind, and the first thing you know, you got a full house. Ohhh! We got him! He's in hysterics. As long as we got him, I'm gonna tell him another joke. Go ahead. Do you know I've been married for 25 years and I'm still in love with the same woman? How come? When my wife finds out about it, she'll kill me. I wish somebody would kill me. Open up.! Mrs. McGillicuddy. Come on. We've gotta hide you. She'll charge us for three in a room. Hurry up. I know you're in there.! Open up.! I want my rent! M... Excuse me. Mrs. McGillicuddy. Tom and I were just saying we haven't seen enough of you lately. If you'd stop sneaking out the backdoor, maybe you would! You owe me three months rent. Why, Mrs. McGillicuddy, how charming you look. I know. It's your hair. You've done something different to it. She put it on her head. I want my money or I'm going after the police. Oh, it's too cold a night to go out riding on a broom. Here, Mrs. McGillicuddy. There you are. That should take care of everything. - Why, it's real! - Sure. And keep the change. There's plenty more where that come from. Well... Wait a minute, Tom. What's the matter? That gold belongs toJoe. Isn't he our pal? Yeah. Pals share and share alike. Everything he's got belongs to us... and everything we got belongs to him. But we ain't got nothin'. That's the way pals work. Yeah? Sure. Come here. Hey! What a funny way to wash his teeth. He's drowning himself again! - Now you gotta stop this nonsense.! - I wanna go home. Y- You can't. Your clothes are all wet. Then I'll go home and get some dry ones. Wait a minute. Now, you stay here and get a good night's sleep. I'll go over and fetch your things in the morning. Well, I'm too tired to try anything else tonight. That's right. I'll get a fresh start in the morning. What's the matter with you? Aw, stop! You're always complaining! Come on! Get your things. Come on in here. Come on, come on. Stop this nonsense. Oh. Would you do me a favor? What's that? Could I have a drink of water? Water? No, no, no. You go to sleep. Hey. He's sleeping on my side of the bed. Where am I gonna sleep? You won't be needing it. We'll have to sleep in two-hour shifts. I don't trust this guy. You mean, you're afraid he, uh... Mm. We'd better keep our eye open. Come here. It's pretty near 11:00. Wake me up at 1:00. You're on the first shift. On the first shift. Mm. You kidding? Ohhh! Shh. Psst, psst, psst. Psst, psst. Mm. It's 1:00. My turn. Come on. It's 3:00. Yeah? 3:00. Yeah. Boy, I sure needed that sleep. Sure. That first two hours is always the best. Shh. Shh. Shh. It's 5:00. You know, I'm a little tired and I don't know why. Come on. Get some sleep. You'll feel better. Okay. 7:00. Already? Yeah. You have a good sleep? Just wonderful. Clock says 8:00. Get some fresh air. Psst. Hey. Hey, you. What do you want now? The clock says 8:00 and it's dark out. It shouldn't be dark when it's 8:00. How would you know? You've never been up at this hour. That's only four times. Hey! Hey, you. Huh? The clock says 8:00... Listen, I don't get up until 9:00. Now leave me alone. I know, but the clock says 8:00 and the church steeple rang four times. So in another hour, it'll ring five times more. Yeah. Five and four is nine, so I've got another hour so sleep. Now, go away from me. Psst, psst. You were right before. The clock just struck 9:00. My turn. I tried to tell you that. I gotta go over toJoe's place and get his things. Uh-huh. Ahh. Whew. Where's his key? There we are. Now, you watch out forJoe there. I... Get up outta there. Get up! Get up and don't wake upJoe. My shift comes awful fast. Never mind that. I can't even trust you. As soon as my back is turned, all you wanna do is sleep, sleep, sleep! Don't you get enough sleep? Come here. Take that key. You go over toJoe's place and get his things for him. Come here. I'll get your clothes. Yeah. Here you are, Geor... George? Now, where did he... George! Will you get up outta there? George, come on. Come on. Pull yourself together. Shh. Don't wake upJoe. Huh? Don't wake upJoe. Put that pillow down. Put it down! Put it down. Come on. Shh. Don't make any noise. Come on. Come on, George! Don't make any noise. You'll wake upJoe. Go ahead, get out. Get out. Get out. Put your clothes on out there and come right back. What's the matter? Uh, nothing at all, pal. Go back to sleep. Go back to sleep, pal. I'll take care of everything. He says he belongs here. I found him sleeping on Joe McDermott's doorstep. Oh, good morning, Captain Chisholm. NuggetJoe. I've been looking for you ever since I docked. I got a note for you from up north. It's... Oh, here. It's from Rosette. Yeah. I don't care who it... From Rosette! Hey! She wants me back! Rosette wants me back! I'm sailing with the tide. I gather I've got another passenger. Yeah, you sure have. Um, boy. I wouldn't be alive now if it weren't for you boys. I don't know how I can repay you. Ohhh. Oh, the gold? Of course, take it. It's all yours. I got a mountain of it in the Yukon. Oh, Joe, you shouldn't have. I shouldn't have a mountain of it in the Yukon? Oh, no. No, no, no, Joe. George. George, wake up. Huh? Wake up, George. We're rich. We're rich! We've gotta get right down to the bank... and change some of these rocks into that green stuff. The bank don't open till 10:00. It's only 7:00 now. There's nothing like being first in line. Wait a minute. Only 7:00? Two hours ago it was 9:00. Well, what's, uh, two from nine? Seven. That's what time it is. Come on. Come on. Let me outta here! I'm going to see my Rosette. She's wonderful! She's a girl? Certainly she's a girl! Well, gold is selling at $20 and 67 cents an ounce. Twelve ounces to the pound is $330 and 72 cents a pound. There must be at least 45 pounds there. Come on. Get up on your feet. The bank will be opening up any minute now. Come on. I wanna see how much gold we got. You wanted to get here to beat everybody to the bank. I've been standing here for three hours. I could've went home, had some sleep. I wanted to beat the crowd. You wanted to beat the crowd. Two guys here. This must be their off season. I wouldn't flash that stuff around if I were you, mister. Why not? A prospector was robbed last night and his body thrown into the bay. Did they catch the killer? No, but the police know who did it. They do, huh? Yeah. It was a couple of volunteer firemen. Anybody we know? Uh, who did they kill? A character out of the Yukon. Uh, "NuggetJoe McDermott. " There must be two NuggetJoes. Here. Read it for yourself. Yeah, I'd like to. Go ahead, gentlemen. Read that. It's gonna rain tomorrow. Never mind that! Read the other. Oh, my. Oh, my. Oh, my. "Police are looking for two volunteer firemen. " Here. Take the gold. Oh, boy. Ooh! Ya thief! "Take the gold, ya thief"? Oh, this is funny. You're wanted for my murder. Well, we finally found something that makes the guy laugh... murder! We didn't murder him. Get a load of this. "Police suspected foul play... "when they found the tattered remains of NuggetJoe's clothing... on a waterfront pier. " That's you! Foul play? You saved my life! "Further evidence was supplied by the alleged killers' landlady, Mrs. McGillicuddy, who was paid in gold nuggets and was told, 'There's plenty more where this came from. " Why, they could hang you on this alone! Oh, no. Wait a minute. They can hang you... hang you by the neck! Hang you by the neck until you're dead. They can hang you! Yeah, yeah! They could hang me by the neck until I'm dead. No. No. Well, it's lucky... It's lucky we got onboard this boat before it sailed. Now you can come down to the police station and prove we're innocent. No, I can't. I can't. I've got to go up to get Rosette. This is the last boat to Alaska for a month! Joe, come on to the police department. Let them see you're alive... What did you say? I said, let's go to the police department, show them... I... I can't hear him! Nobody can hear! Shh! Shh! Wait. Nobody can hear! Stop the whistles! You've gotta come... I can't hear ya! What did he say? Bwoooop! Bwoooop! Don't you start. Please. We've got to... Bwooop! Which way... Which way is the kitchen? Downstairs. Skagway! How do you like it? I'd rather be headed back for San Francisco and prove that you're alive. Let's find Rosette, get the first boat out of here. There won't be a boat leaving for a week. But don't worry about me. Rosette loves me and I aim to keep alive. Somebody aims to keep you dead. What a town. Wait a minute. Must be something wrong. Who'd wanna shoot you? Could be Bob Quinn. But why does he wanna shoot you? Well, I had to hang his brother a few years ago, and somehow he's never gotten over it. I was sheriff of Skagway in '87. In those days, it was a real tough town. Hey. Did you hang anybody else? Quite a few. As a matter of pride, I kept a list. Ohhh. Hey, you got quite a list. Twelve names, in fact. You got nothing to worry about. He was shooting at me. Come on, boys. Let's go. Hey. Wait a minute. He was shooting at you. Do realize if he kills you, they'll hang us in San Francisco? Hey, wait a minute. What about the others that you've hung here in Skagway? Have they got any relatives? Oh, I suppose so, but they don't average more than three or four to a family. Wait a minute. That's about 40 other guys that are out gunning for you. That's about right. Don't worry about them. I have plenty of friends up here. Get out! Get out! That's my place! That's my place! Now, who was that? I just got a squint. Probably Sam Cooper. Sam Cooper? You haven't got no Sam Cooper on the list. Oh, he's not a relative. He's jealous of me on account of Rosette. - Well, put his name down! - Put his name down. Sam Cooper. C-A-M K-O-P-P-E-R. Who is that? Sam Cooper. Come on. Rosette works in here at Stillman's. Rosette. My Rosette. I can hardly wait to hold her lovely hands, to kiss her divine face, to hold... Hey. There's some of my old friends. My old pals.! The guys I came up the Yukon with 15 years ago. Hey, fellas! It's me, Joe! I'm back. I can't understand it. We're buddies. Each one is like a blood brother. They want your blood, brother. They didn't recognize me. If they're your friends, we're better off with your enemies. What have they got against you? I don't know. I can't understand it. I can't believe it. They're my bosom pals. I even remembered 'em in my will. In your will? Oh, no. It couldn't be. Give me their names. Give me their names! Rosette. Rosette. That's the first name. I was told it's cold in Alaska So I dressed for weather that's raw All the men I met said I'll ask her if She'll wiggle and start a thaw I'm just a country gal Who went to town I left my home and went to Nome to fiddle around I met a great big slug Who had a nugget in the friendliest hand I shook it The gold began to glint I took a squint 'n' gave him a hint He took it I love it in Alaska I loved the place at once I found out in Alaska That the night's full as six months I'm just a country gal Who went to town I'm not a saint, I got some paint and did it up brown Maybe I'll go below, but all I know I've had a barrel of fun I look it I'm not the type for wings or halo rings I love other things I love other things Your sweet little country gal Hi, you old-timers! Listen to Rosette. You know, I'm just your country gal, Sam, who went to town. I gave up milkin' for a silken evening gown. How do I look? I was sweet and dear when I came here. I'd say the changes have been extensive. So don't offer me beer, when champagne is near. 'Cause now I'm not only dear, I'm expensive. Shh. I love it in She's singing. The Yukon I love it in Big Bear I love it here in Skagway I love it anywhere Just see what the boys in the backroom will have Tell them I sighed Just tell them I cried Just tell 'em it's free The drinks are on me Your sweet Little country Gal You dirty, low... Wait a minute. Wait a minute! That's a gun! Willie, I don't like shooting in my place. Now, be a good boy, go on home. Joe, I'll get you for this. Hey. What's his name? Willie. I apologize for the interruption, folks! Drinks are on the house! Glad to see you back, Joe. Thanks. Rosette, how can you do this to me? You write for me to come back... and then I find you in the arms of another man. I didn't send for you. I told you I never wanted to see you again and I haven't changed my mind. You're still the same jealous lunatic you always were. But, Rosette... She doesn't love me. She won't marry me. I've got nothing to live for. I'm going to kill myself. Here we go again. Uh-oh. "People who wanna killJoe. Joe wants to kill... " Huh. Joe wants to killJoe? We better get him out of here, boy. Come on, Joe. Hey! Hey! Don't kill him. I'm too young to die. You better take a look around before you start throwing lead, Sherman. Some of it might be coming back. I don't know what your angle is, but the second he steps outside, you better call the undertaker. Thanks, Mr. Stillman, for saving his life. I'll never forgive you. Pardon the interruption, folks, but the drinks are on the house! Take him up to room 11 and watch him. Yes, sir, Mr. Stillman. From now on, you spend your own money. All I said was "The drinks are on the house. " Something on your mind? Why did you send for NuggetJoe? Me? You were a little too anxious to keep him alive. Well, you see, honey, Joe is nuts about you, and I just thought that, uh, well, maybe if I could get the two of you together... Oh, don't play Cupid. You're not dressed for the part. All right then, honey. I'll level with you. The last time you brushed Joe off, he went off and made a will... leaving 2 million bucks to be divided up among those friends of his, those prospectors that came up here with him, in case he didn't have any heirs. Why, the dope made himself a walking target. Well, that's what you get for trusting your friends. You know, Rosette, gold can change some people. It can... Well, it can make 'em greedy. What good would killing him do? Joe's never told anyone where his gold is hidden. The minute he dies, a bank in Frisco has got instructions to turn Joe's map over to his heirs. This still doesn't explain why you broughtJoe back. Look, honey, if you marryJoe, you automatically become his one and only heir. Don't you see? Well, where do you fit into the picture? We're partners. You marryJoe, I make you a widow, then we divide the $2 million. Somebody's got to get it. Why not us? Why not? ButJoe needs you, Rosette. He's changed. He's insanely jealous. And there'd be no living with him the way he is now. Ahh. Funny what gold can do to change a person. That I know. Well, Joe's in here... number 11. I've got George guarding him. Uh, that won't do you any good. I've got to give him the signal. Who is it? Tom. Tom who? What Tom are you expecting? I am expecting Tom, my partner. What do I look like? Hello, Tom! Come on in! Howdy do! Ohh, get in there! Where's Joe? He's in the bathroom shaving. Shaving! He'll cut his throat! Oh, no. Joe! Gimme that razor. Rosette! Rosette, you've forgiven me. Joe, I've got to talk to you... alone. Oh, yeah. Would you fellas mind waiting outside? Uh, certainly not. Well, come on. Can't you see when lovers wanna be alone? Haven't you got a head on your shoulder? Yeeesh. Okay. Go ahead. Rosette, I'm sorry for the way I acted downstairs. We haven't got time to talk about that. You've gotta get out of Skagway. Not until you marry me. Do you know what'll happen if I marry you? No. But I got a pretty good idea. Stillman will kill you. Stillman? Is he in love with you? No, but he's in love with your money. He knows all about the will and the old-timers, and he's figured a way to get around it. I marry you, and then I become your heir. Hmm? He kills you and Stillman and me split your gold. Why did you tell me this? So you'll stop asking me to marry you. No. It's because you love me. I don't love you. I just wanna keep you from getting killed. Here she comes. Let me down. Wait! Ow! Oh! Hey, boys, what are you doing? Rosette, you've gotta marryJoe. Yeah. It'll be a beautiful wedding. There isn't gonna be any wedding. And there's liable to be a beautiful funeral. Awww, come on. Say, he's locked the door. He's got the bed sheets. He's trying to hang himself. Come on. Uh, oh, uh... We gotta break this door down. Get that ax. Hurry up. Wait a minute. Give me a match. What do you want a match for? It says I can't take the ax unless there's a fire. Will you get that ax? Please, use your head. Use my head. Hey.! He's climbing up on the chair. Get outta the way! Let me at him. Right! Come on. Come on. Hup! Come on. Not in there! Over here! It's stuck. Go ahead. Come on. Wait a minute. Come on, boy. Come on! Get it out of there! Now, now, go ahead now. Come on. Get it out. Get it out. Get it... Hey, there's a laugh. I've got Stillman's key. Get down off there. How dumb can one guy get? You could have hurtJoe with that ax. Rosette doesn't love me. Aw, you're crazy! She came up here to warn you. What more proof do you want that she loves you? You really think so? Why certainly! Your whole trouble is that you don't understand women. Listen, our problem is not with Rosette. It's keeping your friends from killing you. - I like the first problem better. - Tsk. Oh. There must be a way. I know what I'll do! I'll make a new will. I'll disinherit them. Then there'll be no reason for them to kill me. How are you gonna do that? I'll go get a lawyer. No. It's not safe for me to be on the street. You better get one and bring one here. We'll get a lawyer if it's the last thing we do. That's a pretty tie. I never saw you wear this one before. Come on, come on. Phew! Oh-ho. Now, let's see over here. Now what? I got some more room over here someplace. Herman Martin, attorney at law. We finally find a lawyer and he turns out to be an old-timer. That's our luck. Now we've got to dig up another one. Uh-oh. If we have to dig up another one like the last one, they'll have to dig us up. Well, let's look around. There must be another one around town. I beg your pardon, miss. Uh, do you know of any other attorney around here besides the one across the street? Yeah. There's Bob Higgins. The tall fellow at the roulette table. Say, you're kinda cute. Have a drink? Hey, Tom. Brown milk. That's not milk! Uh, Mr. Higgins? Yeah? Uh, I'm Tom Watson. This is George Bell. We'd like to see you on business. I'll see you in my office in about an hour. Uh, same numbers. This is very urgent. We've gotta see you right away. What about? Hey. Can't take up room at the table unless you make a bet. Rule of the house. Make a bet! How do you play the game? Bet any number you want from one to 36, black or red, odd or even. Ohhh. Okay. Give me a stack of chips. Small stack. Go on! Put it on any number. Okay. I'm gonna put it on a number. We've gotta ask you several questions. You don't mind, do you? No. - Number one. - Number one. Are you friendly with Jake Stillman? Not particularly. Number two. How long you been at Skagway? Oh, about a year. He's not an old-timer. He just got here. Good! Uh, you question Mr. Higgins. I'll be right back. Number one, the winner. Ah, I guess this isn't my night. Uh, number three. Are you in love with Rosette? Why should I want her? Try it again. What about you? - Number four. - Number four. Look, what's this all about? Now, we gotta make sure that we can trust you. Did ever have any of your relatives hung by NuggetJoe McDermott? No! Number four, the winner. Number five. Did you ever wanna kill NuggetJoe McDermott? What are you talking about? I'll stick with the same ones. And yours? Number six. Number six. Do you know how to change a will? Any lawyer knows that. Then you're just the man for us. Number six, the winner. He's won over $40,000. He's letting it ride. Yeah. I've been here all day and I haven't even had a winner. We'll take good care of you. For what? Uh, all you have to do is change a will. NuggetJoe's will. How much? $500. $500. More than you can win here at this game. Right. He's stopping over at Stillman's place right across the street. Wait till I get rid of these and I'll meet you in his room. We'll wait for you. - What's his number? - Eleven. Eleven. Number 35 wins. Well, that cleans me out. I'm dead broke. Better luck next time. How did you do? - I don't know. How did I do? - You lost. Ah. The only dollar I had. I lost the dollar. So what? You lost a dollar. Come on. I don't think anybody can win at this game anyway. I still can't understand why he can't come to my office. Is there anything crooked about this? Oh, certainly not. Is there any danger? Oh, positively not. None whatsoever. He wants to know if there's any danger. This-This-This is a legitimate... This is a legitimate business. If they won't change my will, there must be another way to outsmart them. I got it! It's simple. Oh, yeah? If I move the gold and hide it in another place, then the map won't be worth anything. Hey... yeah! Then the old-timers will have no reason to kill you. I'll need a sled and a dog team. We can get it at that trading post. Sure. No. Old-timers run the place. I got it! You have? Phfft! Do you hear what he said? What? Phfft! I really got it! Huh? Rosette can take us on her sled. You think she'll go? If Rosette doesn't go, I don't care what happens to me. I just as soon... Here we go again. Uh, Joe, I'll speak to Rosette. She'll go with us. Come here. Let me talk to you. He's getting depressed again. Now stay here and don't let him out of your sight. Stay as close to him as you can. Go ahead. But, Rosette, it's all up to you. If you don't go, Joe won't go. And if he stays here in Skagway, he's a goner. Well, I don't know. I'd hate to haveJoe's death on my conscience. Then you will go? I don't have much choice. But how do we getJoe out of town without Stillman knowing about it? Oh, Stillman. There's a guy who wouldn't let $2 million slip through his fingers if he had to nail 'em together. If there was just some way to get him off the track. Yeah. It's me, Rosette, are you decent? It's Stillman. Just a minute, Jake. Quick. Are you alone? Well, yeah. Anything special, Jake? Well, I, uh, I was just wondering, when do I get an invitation to the wedding? Well, it isn't as easy as you think. Nobody will marry us. Well, there are two justices of the peace in town. Well, they're both old-timers. Uh-oh. I hadn't figured on that. I think I know how we can get around it. Yeah, how? We could go up to one of the Eskimo villages and find the missionary. Yeah, he could marry ya. You know, you're a smart girl, Rosette, and when you get back I'll have a nice wedding present waiting for your groom. Silver too. What are you trying to do? You can't tie a knot with those big gloves on. Take 'em off. Yeah, you're right. What's the matter with you? Do the impo... How'd you get those hands so dirty? My hands aren't dirty. They're not... They're loaded up. Good. I hope for Rosette's sake that this is going to be a wedding... and not a double-cross. Sorry we can't wait until you boys locate another sled. The sooner we get started, the better. Right. Fellas, we'll move the gold and meet you at the Mukaluk Eskimo village. - But suppose we can't buy a sled? - Then you better get one someway, somehow. It's not safe for you to be in this town once the old-timers find out Rosette and me are gone. But we don't know how to get to Mukaluk. I'll have Gloria take you. Gloria? Gloria, my lead dog. Why she can find Mukaluk blindfolded. I had a girl once by the name of Gloria. Come on, Gloria. Well, so long, boys. See you in Mukaluk. So long. Mush! Well, first we've gotta get some dogs now. Let's go up north. Why? That's where the Pole is. So what? Dogs like cold weather. Oh, yes. Yes. Come on. He just started out. Stay with 'em, but not too close. Ha! Aw, he got away. That's the fourth one that got away. Hey, wait a minute. There's another one. Shh. Here, pooch. Here, pooch. Come on, poochie. Aw, he recognized us. Word must've got around. He went in there. Hold that. Ooh! Hey, I got it by the tail. Bring him out. Hey, there's another one in here. I got another one by the tail. Two of'em? Good. I got two of'em by the tail. Well, come on. Here's the bag. Whoo, these little son of a guns are puttin' up a stiff battle. Come on. Give 'em to me. Come on. Get the bag. Oh! What do you mean, you? Don't lose 'im. Maybe he's got a friend. Where'd he go? Huh? There he goes! Come on. Now, he's around here somewhere. You watch around here, I'll go over and look around here. Oh, why don't you get with your father or something? You see the dog? I saw a lot of crabs. Live crabs and they hurt. They had me by the fingers. Aw, why don't you stop that nonsense? Alaskan crabs? Those little things, they don't hurt ya. Afraid of an ordinary, little crab. Where's your nerve? What's the matter with you? You wanna see these? Naw, I don't worry about them. I'm not afraid of crabs. I-I... Ohhh! Must of saw another... Ooh! Well, that's that. Now let's sneak out before the town wakes up. - Are the dogs all hitched? - Everything's all ready. I don't know if I'm doing right getting into this sleigh. What are you talking about? This is the fastest dog team in the whole world. What do you mean? Get a load of all my dogs. See the first dog? Yeah. That's Butch. Then there's George. Then there's Albert. Then there's Gene. Then there's Joe. What makes 'em so fast? You see the lead dog? Yes. Her name is Gloria. Oh, come on. Let's get going. How do you work this? Well, you just, uh, put one foot on the runner, and take the whip, snap it, you know, and holler "mush. " Okay. Come on. Oatmeal! I said "mush. " It's the same thing. Oatmeal! Hey! Wait for me. Good. You got the idea right away. You idiot! Stop the sled. Don't tell me, tell them. Alex, shut the door. There's a draft. George. George, where are you? Where are you? I'm over here. Over here where? Over here. Where are you? Over here where? I'm over where here? You? I guess when we hit those flour bags, we must've blacked out. I think we whited out. Wh-Where's the sled? I don't know. Hey, wait a minute. What's this? Here we are. There's the sled. Where's the dogs now? The dogs. The dogs there? The dogs! What's the matter? No dogs. No dogs... and look where we are. You know what this means? We're lost in Alaska. Snow and ice. Ice and snow. Snow and ice. Wait a minute. I'm here too, you know. I'm here beside the snow and ice. Us... You're here? Why, stupid, you know it gets as cold as 50 below zero here? I got news for you. I don't care if it was 100 below zero, I came prepared. What do you mean? I got something to show you, baby. I don't care how cold it is. Better have something, boy. Hot water bottles. Keep me warm. Hot water bottles up here? Hot... Get a load of that. What's the matter with you? Where are your brains? Where-Where I always have 'em. Aw, stop up there. You have no brains. Get a load of this. And if you did have any brains, they'd probably be frozen as solid as this ice. Solid. Solid ice, just like your brains. Look at that. And as thick as your brains. All ice. You oughta be ashamed of yourself. That explains a lot of things. For instance? Help me get this one off, will ya? - Never mind. Keep it on there and suffer. - Get it off. If we could only find some grass. I don't mind getting the hot seat, but the cold seat, I don't like. If we could only find some grass... or maybe a tree! Hey, a tree. Yeah. If we could only find a tree we could find the dogs. Find the dogs and we find a tree. Come on. Come on! You're the laziest guy I've ever... All right, get up in front there and pull. I'll push. Huh? Go ahead. Get up there and pull. Why do I always have to pull? Because you haven't got brains enough to push. Now go on, pull. Well, pull it! Come on. Pull it. Pull it! - Attaboy. Come on. Pull it up! - What are you doing? Come on now, pull it. Come on. Get up on your feet. Now go ahead, pull it. Come on! Heave! Pull it. Come on. Now you're doing it. Attaboy. Come on, George. We've only got a little more way to go. Maybe we better go around. Look, brainless, there is no way around. Now, pull. Come on. Wh-Whoa! Pull me up! - Now what's wrong with you? - Hey, I think we oughta change places. I give you the easy job, and what do you do? You complain. No-no-no! I still think we oughta change places. Quit dragging your feet, I need help. That's what I said. Now stop hollering and start pulling. Hey, Tom, a dog just come out of this one. What? Hey, a dog was swimming in there. You're crazy. Hey, Tom. What? There's another dog in there. That's ridiculous. Now we've gotta catch some fish to save our supplies. Now get some fish. I can't do any fishing. My hands are cold. How can your hands be cold with those thick blue gloves you have on? These ain't gloves. Th-That's my skin. I'm cold. Well, take your skin off. Whoo. Hey, Tom. What? Now, don't lie to me. You think we'll ever get back to San Francisco safe? - Now, don't lie. - I don't know, George. It looks bad. They may find our bodies up here in the snow... after the polar bears get through with us. Tom. What? - Go ahead, you can lie to me if you want. - Listen, I used to love bears. I remember when I used to go hunting bear in San Francisco. Did you ever go hunting bear? Always had clothes on. Well, you gotta have clothes on to hunt bear. Well, if you hunt bare, how can you have clothes on? Do you know what bears are? I'm talking about a bear. You go bear hunting, you go bearhunting. You hunt bear. Same thing. I used to go hunting for reindeer. Reindeer? Reindeer. - Did you ever hunt deer? - Yes, sweetheart. Oh, stop. You're getting silly. Hey.! I got a nibble. Hey, you got a nibble. I see another dog in here. Huh? There's another dog poking his face... Oh, stop with those dogs! I... You got a nibble? This is a tough one. Somebody got a car up here, driving? Why? I hear... Oh, that's your imagination. You're hearing things. There's that dog again. Look. - What? Where? What are you talking about? - The dog. He keeps looking at me. I don't see any dog. It's getting you, boy. It's getting you. He's fishing, I think. I ain't gettin' nothin'. Huh? I am not getting anything. Wait a minute. I got a bite. You gotta bite? Yeah. Wait a minute. Whoa. Hey, I think I got something. I think I got something now. You got something? It's a heavy one. It's a heavy one. Wait a minute. Oh, I... I gotta jerk on this line. Whoa! Tom! Tom, this is... Tom, this is the biggest fish I ever caught, Tom. Oh, boy! Get the size of this one, Tom! Hey, Tom! This fish is all dressed. A talking fish. Hey, Tom? Hey, Tom? Tom, I-I got a fish that talks. Oh, Tom? Hey, Tom? Tom? Darn it! Always the big ones! They always get away! Hey, Tom, did you see the size of that fish? That was me... you! That was you? Hey, Tom. Come here. Now let that be a lesson to ya. I'm freezing. I can feel it. The last four hours, I might just as well of been alone. Well, say something. Give me your hand. My arm's freezing. It's getting stiff. Oh, new signposts. No signpost. Looks like walrus. Oh, no. No walrus. White man. Frozen. We take back to Mukaluk village. - Which way Mukaluk? - Me check road map. Me find out. Good. He's thawed out. Rosette! Joe! You better have the doctor check him. Heh-heh. It's Tom. Tom! Tom! Take it easy. Take it easy, kid. Doctor says he oughta have his head examined. You boys will feel a lot better once you've had some hot food. I feel much better now that I've found you and Joe again. - I wouldn't go through this again for a million dollars. - It's $2 million. And it's on the sleds and ready to be moved. If you think $2 million is gonna make any difference to me... I think so. But it has to be moved first thing in the morning. Stillman's on our trail. Stillman? Eskimos told us he was at one of the nearby villages asking questions. Uh-oh. W-W-We better get that gold outta here. Oh, Stillman won't catch up with us. He has to stop somewhere for the night. Oh, boys, I want you to meet an old friend of mine. Canook, chief of the tribe. Canook says welcome to his village. He says he's glad you're feeling better and any friends of mine are friends of his. He says you're welcome to stay in Mukaluk as long as you wish. Also, you're to be his guests tonight at the ceremonial dance of the hunters. Thank him. Thank him. Go ahead, you. You know, make signs. Thank him. Thank him. What'd he say? You're welcome. Sign language. Hey. Hey. What'd I say? Oh, you told him a funny story. Food! Oh, boy. Oh, well. I'm so hungry, I could eat a whale. Good. I hope you enjoy it. Rosette, if we're going to get an early start, we better finish packing the sleds. Good eating, fellas. See you at the celebration. You know that's whale meat. I don't know whether I'm going to like whale meat. Harpoon! I- I-I think I hit the spout. This is all right. Eat anything when you're hungry. I- I don't think this whale is dead yet. Tastes good. You know, sometimes when you cut the snake's head off, it still wiggles in the tail. I- I don't know what part of meat... Cut it out! I- I'm gonna sever your connections, and you ain't gonna do that no more. Do that once more. I dare ya. That's enough! In the eye! That was good. What's the matter, aren't you gonna eat yours? Oh, well, I'll eat it. Go ahead, you have a whale of a good time. What are you perspiring about? Now, is that nice? Eskimo men are courageous when they head out for the open sea Eskimo shes just wait and freeze saying, "Blubba, come back to me" The young and the old face the bitter cold And they know they must not fail Get a sharp harpoon and a serving spoon I wanna hunk of whale There'll be a hot time in the igloo tonight You know a what time in the igloo tonight Drape your carcass with your best parkas Hitch the caribou You'll be smilish pulling your stylish icicle built for two We'll have wingding in the igloo tonight We'll fling a swing-thing till the temperature is right So although a blizzard may blow the zero out of sight There'll be a hot time in the igloo tonight Now how can you tell a boy from a gal when the Eskimos dress like that If there's any doubt, Eskimos find out by removing their partner's hat There'll be a hot time in the igloo tonight A hottentot time in the igloo tonight Lose your blues a'dancing in snow shoes and your furry slacks Climp-clomp-clumpin' the joint'll be jumping And we'll have a couple kayaks The wind'll howl round the igloo tonight A breeze'll prowl nipping everything in sight And although it's 40 below And you look like Snow White There'll be a hot time in the igloo tonight We've lost the trail. You should never have letJoe out of your sight. Well, I couldn't follow too closely. I don't think they're looking for any missionary out this far. I think it's a double-cross. We would've been better off if we stayed in one of the villages. We'll never be able to pick up the trail at night. Well, let's get on over to Mukaluk. We might pick up some information there. Yah! It's drafty in here. Well, close the door. Our igloo is gone. Huh? Our igloo. Oh, igloo, where is "oo"? Igloo. Go on, you dope. You melted it. Hey, where is everybody? Come on. Come on. Hey. Come on, boy. Hey, where'd everybody go? Men on hunt. Where's Rosette and NuggetJoe? Back of igloo. Get sled ready. Oh. Thank you. Say, come here. You're a real Eskimo woman. I wanna tell you a nice Eskimo joke. Didn't work. We'll have to go the long way. Why? Because this way we'll be crossing the ocean, and it's almost time for the ice to break up. Mm. Well, let's get started. Okay. Okay. Mush! Mush! Hey, look! They look likeJoe's bodyguards. Good. If they're around, Joe and that double-crossing Rosette can't be too far away. Mush! Stillman! Uh-oh. Come on. Hey. What's the matter? Stillman, and I think he saw us. Then we better take a chance and cross the ice before it breaks. Call me Little Eva. Shh! Here, give me a hand here, will ya? I'll help you out. Thank you. Mush! Mush! Come on. Give me a hand. We'll turn it around. You boys will have to hold Stillman off until we cross the ice and hide the gold. How can we hold Stillman off? There's the ammunition igloo. You'll find plenty of stuff in there. You go in there and get plenty of ammunition. Wait a minute. You're on my foot! Never mind your foot. You're on my foot! He's on my foot! Never mind your foot! Get out. Thank you. Go in there and get plenty of ammunition. I hope there's a white flag in there. Go ahead. Come on. We'll make our stand right here. Here they come. Keep the ammunition coming. Now, don't shoot to kill, we need 'em to lead us to NuggetJoe. Attaboy. Look out, Tom. I'll get 'em. What are you doing with that? Boy, that was a hard one. What are you doing? You shoot that with an arrow. Shoot with an arrow. Keep it going. I'll get 'em. Okay, Tom! Will you get out of my way! What are you hittin' me for? What are you doing? Pick up something and do something. Go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead. I'm mad. Where am I at? Where am I at? Let's move up on 'em. Attaboy! Keep it coming. Keep it coming, George. Keep it coming. Come on. Do something. Backfired. Ooh. Oops! I got 'em pinned down. Keep the ammunition coming. Oh. What are you doing? Get ammunition! Get some more stuff. Hurry up! We've thrown everything but the kitchen sink. Well, that takes care of the kitchen sink. What's the matter with you? Hey, look. A torpedo. Uh-oh, it's got a hole in it. Firing number one. Here we go! Firing one! What are you doing? What are you do... Come on. Let's get out of here. Okay. That did it! Let's get 'em! There's nothing left to throw but this coat hanger. Here goes. Come on! Ooh! They got one of those things too. They went in the igloo. They went in this one. No, they didn't. Five will get you 10 they went in there. It's a bet. Shut up. They've got to be in there. Now let's turn it over. I win. Then they must be in that one over there. Somebody's fixed these igloos. Wait a minute. Rosette and Joe made it. Come on. Mm. I guess I didn't throw it far enough the last time. What did you do with Stillman? He's right behind us. Then hurry up. Once we get over the top, they'll never be able to catch us. Here. Give me a hand up here. Come on, boy. - Wait a minute. Look who's ahead of us. - The old-timers.! The ice is breaking! Save the gold! Save the gold! No, no. Save yourself. Come on back over here. Hurry up! Jump! Please, come on back over here. Bring the gold. Save yourself. Hurry up andjump.! We'll be safer over there. Step a little to the left, please. Well, let go. Do something! Get me out of here! Will you let go, please? I oughta take... It wasn't my fault. Is that Stillman? Yes. Wait a minute. Look what's ahead of us. The old-timers. All right, men, let's go. Hold 'em, boys. Hank, you and Pete get the gold. That won't be necessary. Drop your guns and get your hands up. I'll keep 'em covered. You get the gold. The sled has sunk. Two million dollars at the bottom of the ocean. Two million dollars. All my money, gone. Your money? It was our money. I didn't even get a chance to kiss the gold good-bye. I've lost everything. My money and... Now, Joe, you haven't lost me. Joe, there's something about you that makes me... Rosette, will you marry me? Eh. Congratulations. I'm gonna give you the biggest wedding that Skagway ever had. But, Jake... I won't take no for an answer. You get married at my place and everything's on the house. But you were gonna kill 'em. Well, you see, gold can do strange things to some people. Well, huh, lots ofluck. - Where's George? He's in the water. In the water? Where? Where is he? George, a fine pal you turned out to be. You know, a fight could've broken out here and I could've been killed. You... Sure, sure. You don't care, do ya? That's all you think of is taking a bath. Come on. Get up out of there. Give me your hands. Come on. Give me your hands. Hold on. Attaboy. Come on. There he is. Come on, boys. Let's get back to Mukaluk. Come on. I don't need this anymore. |
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