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Love & Coffee (2016)
Three hundred one...
three hundred two... three hundred three... three hundred four-- -[exclaims] -[Man] Sorry. Come on! Oh, no! [screams] Oh! [Woman] Are you okay? Sorry. Yes, I'm fine. Aw, man! [Man] Excuse me. Excuse me, everyone. The Flavor of the Year is about to be announced. Star Kreme-ers, this is a pre-recorded message from South by Southwest. As you all know, there is nothing more synergy-inducing and cool than corporations and music coming together. It was a huge success this past-- [audio cracking] It was a huge-- -[audio crackling] -Damn it! You morons! Just open the damn door. [Segway wheels squeaking] Hey, Mr. Gobbs. The merger of science and food has always inspired me. It's what makes Star Kreme the world's largest coffee and donut company. Now, as everyone knows, every year, we issue a new flavor, from Pumpkin Fizz to Green Tea Mocha Donut. And today... Today, I am proud to announce our newest flavor to the family. Cinnalicious! Zoe Walker's cinnamon bun flavored mochaccino. [applause] [cheering] This is such an honor. I never dreamed this could be possible. But after long hours in the lab and extensive market analysis, I can confidently say that this is statistically guaranteed to be our most popular flavor ever. [applause] Okay, Kreme-ers, back to creating. -Mr. Gobbs, thank you so-- -Don't talk. I learned many things at that music festival, like how Millennials care about the story behind their food. The farm where their kale is grown, the Portland collective where their bullshit chia seed jam was made. You see what I'm saying? Oh. Well, uh... I guess the story for Cinnalicious is that it was... made in a lab and based on a focus group. Exactly, which is why it will fail. Look... I know things have been difficult since Carl left. God, he was brilliant. [muttering] At stealing. But since last year's Carrot Cake Latte debacle... Go back to work. Back to work. Star Kreme will not survive another flop. Don't worry, sir. Cinnalicious is bound to hit every demographic. Not with freeze-dried coffee crystals. No, no, no, we're gonna use real beans from a real farm. Something natural, something hand-picked. But isn't that more expensive? I want you to scout the warehouses in Medelln. I want you to find a company that believes in its products. Something interesting, something real, something... Look at me. Something... with a story behind it. Yeah, sorry. You want to send me to Colombia? You impress me with this one, and you could run your own lab. I must ride now. No, no. [chuckles] I wish I could just take my lab coat. Oh, why not? Passport. [sighs] It's my turn now, asshole. [Colombian music playing] My family has been in Colombia since the good old days, and I can personally assure Star Kreme the largest quantities for the lowest price. But is there a story behind this place or the beans? Well, you're not just looking at Colombian beans. Our company is more of a loading dock. We carry beans from all over, Peru, Brazil, Venezuela. Peru... There's a lot of environmental damage in those countries. [chuckles] This is how we can keep up with the demand of companies such as Star Kreme. Everyone wins. Your test samples, as requested. Thank you. What is-- Is that mold? I can assure you our beans carry the same flavor as any generic grocery store brand. We took the liberty of brewing you some coffee. -Thank you. -Enjoy. Aromatic quality... Medicinal. Ah! What is that smell? Must be the smell of our wonderful coffee. No, it's... It's coming from outside. Thank you. We will be in touch. Hang on. You haven't even tasted it. I don't need to. [inhaling deeply] [inhaling deeply] [sighs] I can almost taste it. [inhaling deeply] Where is it? That is the most intoxicating scent. Would you like your fortune read? Sure. An old Turkish tradition. I thought we were in Colombia. Coffee, my dear, is everywhere. Wow. Only drink from one side of the cup. I think I'm gonna need to sit down. That is incredible. No, it's transcendent. Make a wish. My own lab. Oh, my! You're going to go in a long, long journey. Let me guess. Back to America? Your wish will come true. If you tell me where to get these beans, my wish really will come true. Okay, but it's quite a story. Perfect! Deep in the jungle, where the humming birds sing and the jaguars sleep, is a place. Only here will you find these treasured beans. Many have come seeking the black gold for themselves, but all have been turned away. We are still talking about coffee, aren't we? Yes, the best coffee. Organic, all-natural. Straight from farm to cup. "From farm to cup." Gobbs will love that. But the farm is in trouble. It's been plagued by death, ill-fortune... lost love. I can help. My company can help. Great coffee and a great story. But who? What? Where? [speaking Spanish] The Dancing Goat Coffee Plantation... in the heart of San Vicente. San Vicente. You will find Diego Valdez. Diego Valdez. Just one bus to San Vicente? Uh... Uh... [speaking Spanish] [speaking Spanish] Oh, okay. Watch out! [grunts] Okay. Gracias. -Come on, Gobbs. Pick up. -[telephone ringing] [Gobbs on voicemail] Leave a message to G-to-the-O-to-the-double-B-S. -[beep] -Hi, sir. Zoe Walker. Um, I've had to extend my trip a little longer, but-- [telephone beeping] Of course. [speaking Spanish] Oh, San Vicente? S, San Vicente. Okay. Whew! Okay. Hola? Is anybody here? Anybody? You! Hey, excuse me. Do you speak English? Um... [speaking Spanish] S. I forgot how everything closed so early in this town. Oh! It's my first time here. Uh, do you know where the Dancing Goat is? It's a coffee plantation. They make the best coffee I have ever tasted. I'm a coffee buyer from Star Kreme. -Star Kreme? -Yeah. You're not gonna like this, but it's, um, all the way up there. Hmm. No, you've gotta be kidding me. -Up there? -Mm-hmm. And first, you have to cross the river. River? [Zoe] Oh! Don't worry. No piranhas at the moment. [laughs] Um, but-- Excuse me. Is the bridge safe? [speaking Spanish] "So-so." Come on. [Zoe] Oh, wow! It's moving. [Bridge Guard] It's a bridge. [breathing heavily] Come on, Zoe. Don't... Don't be ridiculous. Okay. [whimpering] -[goats bleating] -What the... Oh, no! Um... -[speaking Spanish] -[telephone ringing] -You have got to be kidding me. -[speaking Spanish] Hi, Mr. Gobbs. -[Gobbs on telephone] Hello? Zoe, hello? -[exclaiming] -[speaking Spanish] -[exclaiming] One moment, Mr. Gobbs. No! Don't... No! -[Gobbs on telephone] Hello, Zoe? -Oh, yes! Yes! Thank you. [Bridge Guard] You really should never run-- I have to get my phone! It's over there. It's over there. [Gobbs on telephone] Zoe? Hello? Are you taking a shower or something? Stay there. Stay there. Yes! Oh, god! Damn it! Okay. [Gobbs on telephone] Hello? No. No, come here. Come here. No! [Gobbs on telephone] You're really-- [indistinct Gobbs on telephone] [exclaims] No! No! Oh, no! Oh, god! Why is it so warm? Okay, where are you? Come on. Yes! Yes! Yes. No! Aw, you gotta be kidding me. When I get my own lab, I'm gonna design water. [laughs] Water has already been invented. And when I get my own lab, it's gonna be air conditioned. The Dancing Goat. We're here. -The Dancing Goat! -Yes. Thank you. And thank you. Let's buy some beans. Hello? Hola? Is anybody here? -[insect buzzing] -Oh! [exclaiming] Oh, no, no, no, no, no! No! No! No! [exclaims] Okay. Oh, gross! [Man] The shelter is in town. Hi. I just got here. Okay. Well, you can stay tonight in the barn. But the last mendigo tried to steal our donkey, so please don't get any ideas. Believe me. I don't wanna see a donkey... Hey, I'm not homeless! No, I've come to talk to Diego Valdez. Oh, sure. And what do you want with Diego Valdez? Oh. Sorry. I don't normally look like this or-- [sniffs] Oh! I don't smell like this either. I'm Zoe Walker. I'm a coffee buyer from Star Kreme. [speaking Spanish] You? How did you get here before... I left before you. I took a plane. You said I had to go on a long journey. Your fortune said a long journey. Tia, how could you bring this American filisteo-- -Hey! -...to my plantation? Don't be so rude, Diego. Hey, you're Diego Valdez? Yeah. Yeah, and let me guess. My aunt fed you an El Dorado tale about some magical plantation. Normally, I would think it was a scam... but I tasted your coffee. And it is the real deal, so... So I came. I would rather burn this entire plantation to the ground than ever sell to you. [sighs] My nephew can be a little dramatic. Oh, my god! What have I done? Remember. Your wish will come true. Which way to the barn? I can offer you a room much better than the barn. I really appreciate you letting me stay here. I'm sorry about Diego. He has trouble with change. But, you know, old ways don't open new doors. Aw! Is this Diego and his little sister? Well, I suppose they do look alike, but that's Olivia. She grew up on the next farm. Olivia was Diego's fiance, but that's all in the past. I'm sorry. No, things happen. Listen, I really do want to share your coffee with the world, but Diego seems pretty adamant. Maybe I came on too strong. I definitely wasn't my most professional. Tomorrow is a new day. I let you settle in. Maybe take a shower. Oh, definitely. Thank you. Welcome. Star Kreme! [scoffs] More like Star Crap! All the monstrosities they come up with. Hey, how about a Hot Dog Latte? Wow! It sounds delicious, right? Or a Waffle Macchiato? Jesus! Why not just serve flavored mud? Oh, Tia. Please, that nice girl came all the way here to buy from you, and you turned her away. Please! Nice girl? Tia, who knows what junk she wants to turn my beans into. "Junk"? The only junk I hear are the words coming out of your mouth. I'm very disappointed with you, Diego. You are a wonderful farmer... but a pesimo empresario. Yeah, you're always raving how people nowadays don't understand the beauty of coffee. This is your chance. Show her. This is our last year, Diego. I know that. You know that. But it doesn't have to be if you make this deal. This girl, Zoe, is here, and she can help us. Yeah? [speaking Spanish] -[exclaims] -Whoa! Oh, my god! Don't you knock? I suppose you've come to send me to the barn. Uh, no. I thought you might be hungry. Um... This is sancocho de gallina, chicken soup with root vegetables, my aunt's specialty. Well... thank you. Sure. And, uh, I also... wanted to... make a deal. Look, you caught me at a very difficult time. I will sell my beans to Star Kreme, but... they're not to be used in any asqueroso flavors. They must be sold as-is. You know, not all flavors are bad. I mean, if we only knew vanilla, we wouldn't know the joys of chocolate or Rocky Road. And I for one would not wanna live in a world without-- Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! My family didn't toil under the Colombian sun for six generations to make Rocky Road. They did it to make coffee, pure, unadulterated coffee, and that's the only way I will sell it. Okay, fine. Look, we really value your beans, and Star Kreme would be honored to be a part of that. No flavors. Star Kreme would be honored, because Star Kreme really values my beans. Mm-hmm. Values, appreciates, adores. We can have the trucks here by tomorrow. We haven't finished the final harvest, and roasting takes time. Oh, no, don't worry about it. We'll do the roasting ourselves. Roasting is the most important part. Oh. I'll tell you what. You can prove how much Star Kreme appreciates, values, adores my beans by doing the final harvest with me. I must know my beans are in the hands of someone who understands that coffee is not just a simple beverage, but an invitation to life. Hmm? [sighs] You will work from dawn to dusk. You will pour your sweat and blood into the soil. Blood? You will fall in love with my beans. Okay, and how long does bean-love take? Oh, a lifetime. But realistically, a few days. So, you may bring your trucks once you have made the perfect roast. I will think about it. Fine. Think about it. But if you're in, we start tomorrow. 6:00 a.m. [rooster crowing] Wow. Good morning. So, do we have a deal? We have a deal. I will make the perfect roast... or die trying. This looks amazing. Thank you. You're welcome. Oh, my goodness! Mmm! I'm detecting banana, strawberry, and... mango. It has a high pulp concentration and yet a sherbet-like texture. Do you always talk like that? What is this most delectable fruit? [Man] Cherimoya. Yeah, it's called cherimoya. Mark Twain-- No, no, let me. Let me. Mark Twain called it "the most delicious fruit known to man." But, you know, I think it is the most delicious fruit known to donkeys. I introduce myself. My name is Jorge, but everybody here calls me Caturra. And this... This is Peaberry. Hi. I'm Zoe. Sorry? Zoe. Zoe? What's that? A name? No, we're gonna do something. You call me Caturra, and I'll call you... Pelo Loco, okay? -Okay, that sounds pretty. -Yeah. That means "crazy hair". -Oh. -[Jorge laughs] He's very cute. No, no, Peaberry... Peaberry is a woman. -[brays] -Oh, I am so sorry. -How would you like some cherimoya, Peaberry? -Oh, come on. -That's it. -Oh, she loves it. Yeah, she does. Good girl. I think that's enough. Eat up. [Diego] First, you need to stand on the soil and feel the plants' energy. Okay, ready? Good. You will pick the entire row. Only the red cherries. And tomorrow, you will pick the whole row again. What? Why? The orange cherries will be ripe tomorrow. I'm sorry, but this is not an instant blend. Quality takes time. It sure does. Hey, you're the girl from town. And you're the coffee buyer. She spent the night, I see. Here comes trouble. [speaking Spanish] Don't call her mula. What are you doing here, Olivia? I just got back. I thought that we could talk. Well, uh... I'm busy. I'm buy right now with my new worker, and we were just about to start picking. I should go, uh... make a phone call. You guys should talk. Hey, you know, you don't have to show me where the phone is. I'm sure I can find it by myself. Are you okay? She thinks she can just show up after years and what-- Oh! Who is this little fatty? What? What? Oh. That's, uh, Jorge. No way! Gosh! You guys have known each other for quite some time then, huh? My parents cared for him. Oh, they cared for his pet as well. That's Peaberry. Oh, wow. Your parents sound incredible. They were. Okay, uh, make it quick. We've got a lot of work to do. [Zoe] Hey, Diego. Yeah? I hope my presence doesn't complicate anything between you and Olivia. Oh, it's already pretty complicated. [rotary phone dialing] Need a phone from this century? That would be great. My room. Oh! [both laughing] What can I say? Diego's parents really loved coffee. I gather they're not around anymore. Yes, they passed away years ago. Oh. Diego and I are the only Valdez left. Ah, the memories still live on in our hearts. Oh, your phone! [Zoe] Oh, wow! Or do you prefer my computer? [Olivia] Diego? Diego, come on. Don't avoid me. I don't hear from you for years, and then you just suddenly show up. I'm sorry. It was wrong of me the way I disappeared. I don't know what happened to you in London, but you cannot just come back here and expect everything to be the same. I've moved on. It's her... the coffee buyer? Her name is Zoe, and she's not just helping me with the harvest, but she is going to share my coffee with the world. [Skype call ringing] -[electronic music] -Oh. Mr. Gobbs? [Gobbs through computer] What do you think? It's called Moroccan Boy. It's the hot tan shade this year. I was not aware of that. [Gobbs through computer] Where you been, yo? Star Kreme-ers need to stay in Star communication. I know. I'm sorry. I'm in the middle of nowhere. But I have exactly what we're looking for. We have a great story. The plantation is natural, organic, and legendary. [Zoe through computer] It produces the highest-grade quality coffee, farm to cup. [Gobbs through computer] What did you say? Say that again. What was that? "Farm to cup"? Holy shizer! That's brilliant! How much have you shipped? Well, they're very eco-conscious. They wanna make sure the people buying their coffee really appreciate it. We'll ship as soon as I finish helping with the harvest. Ingenious approach. Zoe! Zoe, Zoe, you are brilliant. Everyone is gonna want Cinnalicious now. This is gonna be our... our... our El Dorado! About that, sir... [Gobbs through computer] You're not worried about that lab, are you? -How did you know? -[Gobbs through computer] I haven't forgotten. You just make sure nothing derails Cinnalicious. I want those beans ASAP. Gobbs out. Sir-- Sir? The-- Okay. Let's do this. Man, this is going to take forever. Gee, I'm really loving the land. Totally appreciating nature. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. [speaking Spanish] It's all in the wrist. Check it out. My wrist technique is legendary. I bet it is. Do you want me to teach you? It's very easy. Here, look. You grab a bunch of beans, you twist... you push down with your thumb. You see? And that's it. I guess I could use some help. -Yeah. -Cool. Here, um... try that branch right there. Aw! Cute! Look at the little frog. Aw! I think he likes you. -No! -What? God, that thing was, like, the size of my pinky toe. Don't worry. That thing carries enough poison on its skin to kill 10 men. How could you not have told me that was poisonous? I could have died. I, uh, guess I forgot. Forgot? That was crazy, Olivia. Just the way you like it. [speaking Spanish] -[Peaberry braying] -Why did you do that? Peaberry! Come on. Peaberry! No, no, no, no, no. Peaberry, come on. Come here. I am so sorry, Jorge. I lost my best friend forever. Okay, that's enough. You, no more picking. -And you... -Hmm? What are you even doing here? Take that basket off. Why? I'm just doing what I'm good at. Uh... Okay, if I'm not picking, can I be roasting? You will now learn to pulverize. Come. Follow me. Thanks for nothing. [sighs] Oh! Is this where you murder me? What-- Here is where I show you the despulpadora. You know, I feel really bad about Peaberry. And what is wrong with Olivia? Donkeys are bred to be with men. She'll return. And as for Olivia... we have some issues. I would like to apologize for what happened there. You know what? Don't worry about it. Let's just get through this. What did you call this again? The Dora the Explorer? [scoffs] The despulpadora. Okay? Excuse me. Other farms use a mechanical one, but this is more selective. You can actually see which beans have been de-skinned and which haven't, okay? Watch it. [grunts] Oh, and it's a better workout than CrossFit. Ugh! Great. Oh, hey, when am I gonna be able to roast? When you're ready. All yours. [straining] Oh, come on. Why didn't I do more CrossFit? Really? A dart frog? That was crazy, Olivia. I don't trust her, Diego. Trust? Oh, come on! You tried to kill her. Oh, come on. Don't exaggerate. Plus, I'm sure that Tia Juanita has some medicine. Besides... it's natural selection. [laughs] But you know I'm serious. There is something up. What's going on between you and her? How could you, Diego, from the great Valdez family sell to a company like Star Kreme? and I know that you prefer to burn this whole plantation to the ground. Well... maybe you don't know me anymore. Where are you going? At least give me a ride. So... what happened to your motorbike? I don't ride anymore. That's not surprising. [scoffs] What's that supposed to mean? Let me remind you that you always hated having fun. Some things never change. Well, our priorities were always different. Looks like your parents got new gates. Would you like to stop in? I'm sure that my parents would love to see you. Maybe some other time. Sure. Bye. Hey, wait. It was good to see you. I know. [breathing heavily] Every part of me is sore. [sighs] I can't feel my limbs. If only I could feel my heart. Dinner will be ready en un santiamn. I don't understand. In a jiffy. Jorge, please. I'm just gonna... sit here for a while and just... relax. Diego, I don't want you to lose focus. When Olivia is around, you don't think straight. And why are you being so hard on Zoe? Putting her to work in the fields? She doesn't know the land or what's dangerous. I'm teaching her to appreciate coffee and protecting our legacy. But maybe I don't have to sell to Star Kreme. Maybe Olivia's return is for a reason. Please, Diego, open your eyes. You don't need Olivia that way. Tia, how do I know if I can trust Zoe? I know Olivia. Then you should know not to trust her. Okay, do you think Ama y Apa, who dedicated their lives to this place, would want to get involved with a glorified fast food chain? I think su papa y su mama would want you to be your own man. Dinner will be ready soon. Dinner is ready. Shh! Aw, man! I gotta work out more. Okay. [sighs] Sleep well, scientist. Peaberry. I have a cherimoya. [braying] Peaberry? -Peaberry. -[Jorge] No, it is I. Sadly, it is only I. I guess you were looking for her too, huh? Yeah. I'm gonna tell you something that maybe it could sound a little bit crazy. But even when I was with her, I miss her. Hey, I'm really sorry about Peaberry. No, no, no, it's not your fault. It's Olivia. She upsets everything. What was I thinking, coming here and farming? I guess I was just so... Desperate? Driven. I was going to say driven. Ah. Yeah, you're right. I guess I was desperate. I swore I would have my own lab someday. I just wanted to prove it. Prove it to who? To yourself or to someone else? I don't know why I let my ex get to me. He's a liar. He stole everything. I know what it feels to have your heart stolen. Oh, no, no, no. He stole my idea. Ah! Ideas! Ah, no, no, no. Don't worry. You'll have more. Okay, but lately... Lately, I've just been stuck. Look, you work hard and with your heart. That's something that Olivia never did. So, come on, Pelo Loco. You're smart, so use that. Sorry. Zoe. Where is everybody? Gracias. Okay. Buenos das. Hey. What is all this? Now, we don't have to waste time lugging them downhill. Okay. What do you think? Not bad. By the way, do you have any more rope? Yeah, sure. Show me. [giggles] Check this out. What are you doing? Wait for it. Hey, be careful. This ladder is old. Just a little bit more. Okay. Okay. There. -[screams] -Whoa! Hey. Hey. Hey. Nice catch. Um, my pleasure. Okay. All right. Not bad, huh? It doesn't use any more energy, it's still using your grandfather's device, and... it allows for the worker to clean up a little bit. [Diego] Let's go. Whew! [exhales] [grunts] Good. So, we have pick, pulverize, wash, and now, rake. Rake? No, when am I gonna be able to roast? Hey, in time. I promise. [sighs] I liked it better in the murder shed... with the fan. Some plantations use a mechanical dryer. But there is nothing better than the beautiful climbing sun, right? Okay. -Here, you try. -Thank you. Yeah, start raking. [exerting] Aw, man! No wonder you're so ripped! I mean, from an observational standpoint, your biceps are in peak condition. [laughs] Okay, uh... Just, uh, continue raking while... [breathing heavily] Wait a minute! Excuse me. Yes! That's gotta be faster. How do you do that? -What? -That. Think like that. Well, uh... I guess I've always enjoyed problem solving, being creative. Just... I haven't had a big idea in a long time. What was your last big idea? Well, I... I invented the Glo-nut. The what? It's a colorful croissant-donut. Well, that actually sounds pretty good. Yeah. Everybody loves it. You know what? I think you're ready to roast. -Finally. -Yes. Oh, it is so nice and cool in here. Not for long. -Okay. -No way. You can't possibly roast all those beans on this tiny thing. -Oh, no, actually-- -Whoa! we usually use the machine. But my father learned how to make the perfect roast over a fire, and his father before that. Before he passed away, we used to stand here side by side together. And he taught me to make the perfect roast. Well, I am going to try my best. Good. So, put in only a smidgen of beans, okay? A smidgen? Compared to a sack... it's like three dollops. [shakes beans in pan] Stir the beans until you hear a "pop, pop, pop", just like popcorn... which also came from Colombia. -No way. -Yeah. Hey, by the way, maybe Star Kreme wants to make a Popcorn Cappuccino. -Wow. -Come on! -What? No, I'm serious. -No, you are not. Ye-- Of course I'm not. Okay. So, I guess Olivia is not around today, huh? I don't know. You must have missed her. Well, uh... her absence caused a lot of problems. We were going to merge our two farms together. [clears throat] Oh, okay, so, you keep stirring until the beans turn the color of soil after it rains, okay? "The color of soil after it rains"? What does that even-- Hey, where are you going? To bring you more beans. Mama Tia! So nice to see you. How are you? Is Diego home? Don't you "Mama Tia" me. You broke that boy's heart, and I had to put it back together. I'm here to make amends. I don't know where he is. You do not know where he is. Um, do you mind if I step inside? Yes. The color of soil after it rains. The color of soil after it rains. Yes! No. Maybe. I think. -Uh-uh. Not quite. -[exclaims] No! No! I had it. The ideal darkness, the exact amount of oil. What? What? Are you here to poison me with tiny little frogs again? No, I came to apologize. Oh. Here. Wet wipes? No, thank you. I'm fine. I had some great times in this place. We used to get so hot... The trick is to take the pan off as soon as you hear the popping. Yeah, I know. Of course, you're a scientist. That's right. I am. What is it that you do? Do you cure cancer, or do you design space shuttles, or... Flavors. I design flavors. Look, I really appreciate you taking time out of your obviously hectic schedule to come teach me how to fry beans-- Roast. You are roasting-- Yeah, in a frying pan. You know... those are my beans that you're handling. Really? 'Cause, you see, I'm pretty sure they're Diego's beans, and I have been handling Diego's beans all day. [Olivia] Oops! -[Zoe] Oh, my god! -[Olivia] I should go. What is wrong with you? Come help me put this out. You can handle it. You're a scientist, right? [laughs] Ugh! Unbelievable! What the hell? -She-- -No. Hey, you know what? On second thought, I don't wanna know. Because, you and I, we're going out tonight, and we're going to have fun. [Diego] Zoe, you ready? Yeah, sure. Coming. -[Diego] Zoe? -Yep. Wow. Hey. -Whoa! -Whoa! -There's a step there. -Yeah, I know. Hey, you look great. Good. You look good. Good and great. Goodly great. Ready to see the real Colombia? [music playing] Whoa! -Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! -[music stops] Ladies and gentlemen, the Tejo King has returned. [cheering] [applause] Diego, hey, it's good to have you back. We miss you. Here. Try it. -The Diego shot. -Oh, yeah. -To fun. -Fun. Take your first taste of aguardiente guaro, and I'll tell you all about it. Go ahead. -Salud. -Hey! Now, we ready for some tejo? -Any time. Let's go. -Come on. Let's go. Hey, come on. [laughs] What in the world? Come here. I wanna show you something. -Don't forget your beers. -Oh, yeah. -Here. -Can I have that one? -[laughing] Well, of course. -Thank you. -Salud. -Salud. Watch this out. Cover your ears. -[exclaims] -[all cheering] -What just happened? That was awesome! -Huh? -What just happened? -Now, you try. -Okay. -Okay. Give me this. Hit the metal ring, okay? Just hit... Aw! Okay. Okay. -You know me. I never give up. -Good. -Wow! -[cheering] And so, to the Tejo King and his queen. Yes! Come. That was so much fun. -Yeah, right? -Yes. -[exclaims] Whoa! -[all gasping] You brought her to our place? Excuse me? "Our place"? This is the only bar in town, Olivia. [laughs nervously] Did you know she was gonna be here? What? No. No, of course not. I thought you were working so hard that you deserved a little fun, because I'm a fun guy. Yeah. Do you really wanna have fun, hmm? -Come on, scientist. You and me. -Fun guy. [whistles] Let the tejo begin. -[gun fires] -Whoa! Whoa! No! Whoa! Whoa! Is that safe? Aw! Are you scared of a little danger? No way. Everyone, look at this. [cheering] Time out. -Yes! -[cheering] Come on, baseball. Don't let me down. -[cheering] -You quit? Just like Kobe. Winner, almost by default... -[gun firing] -Olivia! [Olivia] Who's the queen of the night? [music playing] [music stops] I didn't know you could dance. All Colombians can dance. -Okay, my ama taught me. -Aw, that's so cute. Diego, don't forget the tradition. It's gonna be nice. I thought you would hate harvesting, but you really put your heart into it. Well, you know, I'm actually happy you're making me do it. You work in a lab so long, you forget where food even comes from. I was kind of hoping that this experience would help me find a new idea, though. Hmm. Like the Glo-Nut. Exactly. I was engaged too, but he stole my idea and started a whole Glo-Nut empire without me. I've seen you work, Zoe. The next big idea will come. Hey, I've never seen a scientist work so hard at farming. [both laugh] You know, at first, I just wanted to get the hell out of there. But I really appreciate everything you've been showing me. I think we're making some really good coffee together. But honestly, do you think Americans will like the flavor? Uh, yeah. -Yeah, they'll like the flavors. -Hmm. Hey, let's get out of here. Come on. [speaking Spanish] -Bye. -Gracias. Okay. From here, we walk. It's not too far. -You lead the way. -Sure. It's really nice to see you so relaxed. [Zoe] I was just thinking the same about you. [Diego] Careful. Oh, wow! It's beautiful. I know you have only a few more days here, And I don't wanna complicate anything for you. -But-- -Come here. Oh, my god. -Oh, my god! -Oh, my god! That's one way to close a deal. What the hell are you doing here, Olivia? I won tonight, so I'm here to claim my prize. I should, um... I should go? No, no, no. No. No. If anyone should go, it's her. Get out of my bed right now. Diego. Diego, please. Calm down. I miss you. And, uh, I understand now that we belong together. For years, you were all I could think of, but you cheated and left. Now, I need to be with someone who I can trust. I thought that we could talk. [skeptically] Yeah, talk. Well, it's... It's late, and it's very dark outside, so maybe you can give me a ride home. You can have the other guest room. Okay. Fine. I will sleep here. -Hey, I'm sorry about that. -No, I'm sorry. No, you have nothing to be sorry about. Well... it is getting late. Zoe. I had really fun tonight. Me, too. Oh, man! What am I doing? [rooster crowing] [wincing] It's like my hangover is having a hangover. Okay. I cut up some of your favorite fruit this morning. Thank you. Um... I don't think I'm ready to eat just yet. Uh, can I please use your computer again? Of course. Of course. [sighs exasperatedly] [Skype call ringing] [Gobbs] There's my Kreme Queen. What's up, ladies? Sir, I have to talk to you. Peep this, yo. Cinnalicious, the taste be so licious. Grab a cup. Suck it down. It's so hashtag licious. Hashtag delicious? [Gobbs] For the drink, yo. Can you believe no one has used it yet? Sir, we can't use these beans for Cinnalicious. [Zoe] The coffee farmer who runs this place, he's only selling to us because he thinks we're selling these beans as-is. Now, these are hand-picked, hand-split, hand-dried, even hand-roasted beans, sir. They're perfect. And he didn't wanna see such high quality be bulldozed over by one of our test-tube flavors. No, but this is the flavor. [stammering] This is the Flavor of the Year. Yeah, I'm sorry, sir, but I have to agree with him. We can't use these beans for Cinnalicious. I do wanna use them for something else, though. I'll go back to Medelln and find some other beans we can use, but not these. Absolutely not. We launch next week. We're already running commercials for these beans. Oh! No! No! What have I done? What if I don't get these beans for Cinnalicious? [Gobbs] Then you're fired. -Zoe. -Hey. -I have to tell you something. -I have to tell you something. -You first. -Okay. Um, I wanted to apologize again for what happened last night. And say that... I'm going to miss you. I don't know what the future holds. I know we'll be far apart. But whatever happens... I'm glad to have met you, and I really hope we can work something out. I really hope we can work something out too. Really, really hoping. -[sighs] -Hey. So, what is it you wanted to tell me? I am going to make the perfect roast today. [speaking Spanish] Juanita. [Zoe] I tell him. I tell him not. I tell him. I tell him not. What-- Perfect. [laughs] The color of soil after it rains. The color of soil after it rains. Diego! Whoo! Diego! Diego? Diego? Diego! Diego! -Jorge, is that-- -[braying] Peaberry? You have been quite the heart-breaker, you know that? I know someone who is going to be very, very excited to see you. Caturra! Jorge! Oh, yeah! Where is it? Oh, Peaberry! Oh, my baby! I missed you so much. Oh! I missed your hips. Look at this! My baby! What's all that? I finally made the perfect roast. You? Let me see. Ah! Perfect! -Congratulations. -Thank you. You know who is going to be very proud? -Diego. -Yeah. Do you know where he is? -Um, I think... -Thank you. -Bye. -Bye. Diego! Diego! Diego, I-- -[Zoe] Oh, my god! -[Olivia] [mockingly] Oh, my god! I knew she couldn't be trusted. So, this is what my beans are destined for? How could you lie to me? I am so sorry. I lied to you, but I was going to tell you the truth. You're right. Using your beans in Cinnalicious would be a travesty. -But I think you should do it anyway. -What? It'll save the farm. Hopefully, I can talk them in to selling the beans as-is, or maybe you can find another buyer, but if not, the Dancing Goat will still be yours. I know you don't want that warehouse full of beans to go to waste. They're going to waste right now. Using them in Cinnalicious is actually... It's a good thing. I'm just sorry you had to find out this way. I was going to tell you. Say something. Please, Diego, anything. I don't need Star Kreme to save this place. We're getting married. The engagement is back on. We're going to merge our two farms as we always intended. Diego. You should go. I already called you a taxi. [Juanita] Zoe? Zoe. Juanita, I am so, so sorry. No, don't... We will miss you. It's okay. It's okay. [speaking Spanish] [telephone ringing] Hi, Mr. Gobbs. I can't believe you still have a landline. Uh, sir... I didn't get the deal. [Gobbs on telephone] I know. I'm so, so sorry. We had to push the launch of Cinnalicious to source another vendor. Our entire advertising campaign had to be scrapped. You're fired. Make sure you turn in your badge. Diego, Juanita, look. Peaberry's not eating. -What happened? -I don't know what's going on. -Peaberry. -Baby. Hi. She's not eating? [exclaiming in Spanish] -What? -I think she's pregnant. What? She's pregnant. -Oh, beauty. -Oh, my baby. Who did this to you? Come on. Come on. Let's go. Oh, my god. She's pregnant. Eww, that ass is back. -Stay away! -I'm staying away. Diego, change that face, huh? I'm sorry she hurt you like that. Yeah, me too. Now we just have to look to the future. You know, why don't we go to my parents' house to see the farm? I'm sure they're gonna love to see you. Maybe I'll get a cat. No. No. I'm such an idiot. No, I'm not an idiot. I'm not an idiot. Cherry skins. Yes! So, do you like it? Well, uh, your parents have made a lot of changes. Let the tour continue. Look, now what we do is we just drop the beans into these driers, and that's it. Now we have time to do other stuff. Other stuff? Yeah. What other stuff? Anything that we want. We're not tied to this place anymore. [sighs] [inhales] The perfect roast. Please work. Please work. Yes! You have barely said anything. I've been thinking. Mm-hmm, and? And I think we are rushing this. Why are you saying that? Olivia, we cannot just pick up where we left off. Of course we can. We will make it work. The designer you left me for, he dumped you. Let's just say that his preferred blend was light and fruity. Okay. Well, I don't want to be anyone's second choice. So, that's it? What about the wedding? What's going to happen with the farm? I've decided to sell to Star Kreme. For Cinnalicious? You're not going to be able to sleep at night. They can use the beans for whatever they want. I don't care. I can always grow more. So you're finally sacrificing the famous Valdez pride for money? You will never understand. No way. Oh. Oh, my gosh. Yes! Hmpf. [speaking Spanish] Tia, get Siri on your phone. I need your lap pad to scan myself a plane ticket. What? None of what you said was correct. Tia, as you say, people make mistakes. Mine was to let Zoe go. Yeah. Okay, so... Mmm, that button. -This one? -No, the other one. No. Yeah. By the way, where's Olivia? Uh... -The warehouse is on fire! Come on. -What? Wait. Our beans! Shit. [screams] [crying] I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Tia. Oh, my god! I guess you cannot sell to Star Kreme after all. Olivia, what have you done? Nothing. Nothing. I'm very sad about it. I want to help how ever I can. Um, you know, uh, I still think that I can save the farm. Do you remember what you gave me? Of course I remember. Well, you can give it to your cell wife in jail! Yes. Yes! Okay. All right. Uh, security! Give me five minutes. What're you doing? You were fired, remember? I've come up with a million-dollar idea. Make that a multimillion-dollar idea. Multimillion... It's okay. I... am listening. -Taste this. -Oh, no. Last time a fired employee gave me a drink, I had dysentery for weeks. No, thank you. Lesson learned. Believe me, if I wanted to poison you, I wouldn't have shown up in person. Here, look. All right, give me. Effervescent. Fruity. Complex. Invigorating. This is the best artisanal soda I have ever tasted. No, it's not just an artisanal soda. It's an artisanal energy drink. -Wait a minute. So you added caffeine? -No. It's all natural. It's made from coffee cherries. It turns out there's actually more caffeine in the skin than there is in the bean. It is 100 percent organic. That's brilliant. Forget about turning in your badge. I will have your new lab ready in no time. I think this recipe is worth a lot more than a new lab. And the next flight to Medelln? Perfect. -Your plane ticket. -Okay. There's only a flight per day, so don't miss it. It lands at 2:00, and then it leaves at 3:00 to Medelln. Okay. I'm very proud of you, Diego. And I know su papa y su mama tambien. Go find her. My passport. [exclaims in Spanish] It's good to be back. Okay. -I missed it. -Missed what? What? I cannot believe you're here. I was about to fly and find you. You were? I ended it with Olivia. I want to be with you. I came to win you back. I told Olivia how I feel about you. She burned down the warehouse. -Oh, my god. -Yeah. I was going to sell to Star Kreme. I didn't want you to lose your job. But now... I have to sell the Dancing Goat. No. No, no. What if I could... What if I could pay you double for your next harvest? In advance. Please, no jokes right now. I am serious. Now, you sell us the coffee beans and the cherry skins. We're going into production on the world's first ever artisanal energy drink. I named it Peaberry's Secret. I love you. I love you too. I'm going to tell you something. If you hurt her, I'm gonna make longaniza from you, okay? I know it was you. Hm. |
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