- Hey, Rocky.
- Hey, baby.
What's happening?
Moish, listen, do me a favor.
I wanna look busy.
Will you have me paged, okay?
Okay, Rocky, any time.
Hey, that's nice.
How are you doing?
Got a Tuesday for me?
I'm booked solid the whole month.
One Tuesday.
Haven't you got a Friday?
I'm not kidding you. I'm booked.
Everybody's booked solid
so how come nobody's working, huh?
Rocky Papasano
Excuse me, I got a page.
I want to talk to you.
All right, all right.
You want a wedding?
- Tuesday?
- Tonight.
No, Joe. All I got is just one...
Beautiful. You got you got.
Forget it. I'll get somebody else.
Hey, for you I'll change my whole schedule.
He's booked solid.
- Merewitz or Guelman?
- Across the street.
- Friedman?
- Upstairs.
The usual arrangement, right?
Right.
Boy, how do you do it?
Last time I worked I don't remember.
Was it April or May.
Hey, Rocky, Rocky. They're paging you.
Yeah, Moish, thanks, I heard it.
No, it's a real one. I didn't do it yet.
Hi, Marge.
Great. Stay there, don't move.
Stay right there.
- Hey, you got a call for me?
- Some broad's paging you.
On the phone?
No, she's around here somewhere.
A little broad.
Hey.
Are you the one that paged me?
Yeah.
Oh, hum... humm...
You don't remember who I am, do you?
Yeah, it was in a dance in Brooklyn
this summer.
In The Mountains, right?
It was a dance in The Mountains
What to you mean I don't remember?
It doesn't matter.
My name's Angela.
Can I talk to you a minute?
I'm on my lunch hour.
I only got a minute.
Sure, honey.
I'm gonna have a baby.
Congratulations.
Don't worry. I'm not gonna cause
you any trouble.
All I want from you is a doctor.
An address, you know?
Wait, look, you just don't walk
in a place like this and uh...
Oh, forget it.
Wait... wait...
Listen... you just don't...
You just don't walk up to a guy and
tell him something like that.
Finished.
Come on and I'll buy you a cup of coffee.
Hey, hey...
Look!
I didn't think you'd give a damn
one way or the other.
But I did hope that you'd...
Look, will you...
Look.
Wait a minute.
Where can I get a hold of you?
Macy's.
Nine to five.
Fifth floor.
I'm going as fast as I can!
Take it easy, take it easy.
Now stop. Knock it off.
That's right.
Nice, behave. Come on.
Knock it off, shorty.
Get outta here.
Come on, get away.
Gonna get hair all over me.
Come on, ugly.
Ugly? Who are you calling ugly?
Him, the ugliest dog I ever saw.
He is not.
Don't you listen to him, sweetie.
He's a naughty, naughty man,
yes he is, baby.
Where were you this morning
to wake up at dawn?
I told you.
The Union Hall.
I forgot.
Wish I'd forgotten.
Ethan, eat your breakfast.
All right, now. Eat your eggs...
For protein.
What are you doing? Selling protein?
Don't start up with me?
Is it my fault you couldn't find work?
Who couldn't find work? I got a wedding
tonight, tonight in the Bronx.
- Don't take it out on me.
- Taking what out on you?
Look, anytime you're not happy with the...
...hospitality at my apartment,
use the deposit back on your key.
Aw, come on, will you?
I'm dying.
My shirt is sweated right through.
My bones ache.
And my head's killing me.
Are you okay, honey?
You feel warm.
I thought you were dying.
What's the matter?
Jane Russell would do it for Billy the Kid.
My luck to wind up with a sex maniac.
You good?
Yeah.
You know me in the cold weather,
how I love to be in love.
We are in love, aren't we?
Really in love.
Yeah...
You with yourself...
...and me with myself.
Wanna hear your horoscope?
Today?
Stars in the wrong orbit, play it cool,
lock yourself in the toilet...
...and don't come out.
All right...
What happened today?
- Nothing happened.
- Oh, obvious.
What happened, nothing happened.
Great day. Marvelous day.
What a I going to tell you?
I'm sick and tired of that...
...kind of life I lead.
Barb...
Hey, Barb...
Hm-hmm...
A friend of mine asked me if I'd ask you...
...if you knew the name of maybe a kind of
doctor or something.
He's got himself in a little trouble
with a girl.
Hey, Barb...
You want me to find you a doctor?
You want me to find you a doctor?
Now wait a minute, I didn't...
Angie!
Angie!
Angie!
Hey, Angie, over here!
Come on.
What are you looking? We happened to pass
by you in the neighborhood...
...so what's so terrible to give you
a ride home?
It's embarrassing the fruit truck
all the time.
Excuse me very much, your highness.
When I start hauling vegetables in a limousine...
...I'll pick you up in a limousine.
All right, I grant you that time
you went to the dance and everything...
...you were all dressed up and everything.
I can see maybe you don't want
to ride in a truck.
But now you got on your regular clothes
in the daytime.
You're right, Dominic,
what can I tell you?
When you're right, you're right.
Go talk to her lately,
anything you say.
Drive, will you, drive!
I got a date tonight.
She won't run away, I guarantee you.
Miss skin and bones.
Going out tonight, Angie?
Why?
Why, I'm making conversation.
All right, who did you happen
to bump into today?
- What're you talking, will ya?
- Nobody?
Tell her, Julie, what happened.
Did I do anything? Tell her.
We bumped into, what's his name, Columbo.
Columbo.
Clumsy!
Is that nice?
Why do you call a person names?
Clumsy, Clumsy. He can't turn around
without banging into something.
Who wouldn't be clumsy the way
you look at him?
Make 'im nervous.
Anyhow, we met him on the street.
Did we meet him on the street, Julie?
We met him on the street.
He said: how is Angie?
I said, fine.
He said, maybe I'll drop by the house sometime.
I said, fine.
He said, maybe tonight.
I said, fine...
...wonderful that you'd like to see him.
That's the whole thing.
I told you, Dominic,
if you don't stop with this...
What you telling me?
The fella's coming over to the house.
What should I tell him?
You'd hate to see him?
I'm not gonna see him!
Why don't you like him?
A nice boy, responsible,
a nice little business of his own.
I like him, I like him. I love him.
He's Prince Charming, I'm crazy about him.
Hey, you! Don't party in the kitchen.
- It's a dance.
- In a nightclub dance, in the kitchen eat.
You can't keep him home.
This one looks like an old lady.
Why does it bother you?
What's it your business?
If I wanna stay home,
if I wanna blow bubbles,
I have a right to do what I like.
That's what I like to do.
Like? In America everybody wants
to do what they like.
What do they like?
They don't know what they like.
She's waiting in the store for a
movie star on a big white horse.
Mr Charming. Boy, a prince.
What does she want?
A movie star, she wants? On a horse?
- Right, Angie?
- Exactly.
Is that all right with you, Ma?
For me? As long as he's Catholic.
Hey, Angie.
In the old days a young person had respect.
In the old days, you didn't have to like everything.
You did what you had to do...
...and if you didn't like it
you liked it anyway.
Take me, for example.
I met your papa, rest his soul,
on a Sunday, eh?
And on Tuesday you were married.
Yes. And what do I have,
such a terrible life for 32 years?
I hate to remind you about this...
...but today is not the Dark Ages
when you were a little girl.
Okay, today is the Light Ages, sure.
Ah, questa campanella...
All right, vengo, vengo.
I'm not here. That's all.
Angie! It's not nice.
- Hey, look who's here. How are you?
- I was just in the neighborhood...
Hi Tommy, nice to see you.
How are you doing?
Wait a minute, I'm going to get Angie.
- Angie, will you come on out.
- Oh, for crying out loud!
Can't I have any privacy in my house
even in the bathroom?
Is it gonna kill you just to say hello to him?
- Dominic, I've told you 400 times...
- What did you tell me, what?
- Hey, will you get out there and...
- Get out!
I've lived my whole life in this house and
never had a corner where I could put a turtle.
To put a cat or a little turtle.
Turtle, what turtle?
You want a turtle?
I want a room of my own.
What are you telling me?
You want a turtle, buy a turtle.
It's my own fault. It's my own fault.
It's me.
I'm a big girl, I make my own money.
Who says I have to live here
if I don't wanna live here?
And I don't wanna live here.
I'm gonna move out of this house tonight.
This time I really mean it.
- Hey, look who's here. Mr Columbo is here.
- I'm sorry, I mean uh...
...you know, excuse me for dropping in.
I just happened to be in the...
- We're gonna have some coffee.
- Come on, Angie, let's have a cup of coffee.
... I was in the neighborhood...
Darn it! Would you mind if I turn
the water off?
Come on, sit down.
You're just in time for a cup.
Oh, no, really, I couldn't.
I just...
- How's your mother?
- Oh, she...
Sit down.
Bye-bye everybody.
Have fun.
Don't put a dent on that truck
or I'll break your head.
I didn't see her all week.
So I seen your sister and I asked her.
- She tells me it's a virus or something?
- Yeah...
Poor thing,
everyday it's something new, eh?
They couldn't, you know, find anything...
...they took all the tests,
but she still got this, you know... pain
Come on, sit down.
I'll get you a cup of coffee.
And your other sister, how is she?
Is she out of the hospital?
Oh, next week, I think, well, you know...
Ask him would he like
a piece of cake or something.
- Would you like a piece of cake or something?
- No, no, I just came... Ooh!
- It's okay, it's okay.
- Oh, che peccato. Presto una spugna.
- It's all right.
- Spero non si ai brusciatto.
No, no, it's...
It's all right. Una piu, una meno.
- Angie!
- It's nothing.
I'll fix it.
So, how's everything in the
restaurant business?
You know, one day it's pretty good
and the next it's...
...uh, you know, it's...
Oh, look, let me do that.
You'll cut your finger...
No, no. I'll fix it.
Hey, Dominic, we go in the other room
and we close the door.
On the couch I wouldn't trust them
five minutes, but in the kitchen...
...what can happen?
Andiamo, va...
Why don't you sit down?
- Just...
- Sit down.
If I sit down,
I'll probably break the chair.
I don't know what it is.
You oughta see me during the day, I...
I got 15 hamburgers going,
I got franks in the grill...
...white down, wheat down...
...scramble a pair in a skillet.
I don't know.
With this hand I'm breaking lettuce.
I just don't know what it is.
All you have to do is just look at me and...
What's the matter?
What happened?
Look, I...
I better ask you what I...
You know...
Well, I... Anyhow, the thing is...
they're having this dance, you know...
...like a dance...
...over at the Sons of Garibaldi...
and I thought that uh...
Well, you probably got a date already,
probably.
This Saturday night?
This Saturday?
Tomorrow night?
I knew it. Well...
Listen, it's uh...
- Good night, everybody, I gotta...
- Where are you going? What's your hurry?
Listen, with the kind of help
you got to put up with these days...
...you're out of business
in a couple of hours.
I'll see you, Dom, Julie.
It's good to see you, Mrs Rossini.
Come again soon, eh?
- Listen, I'm sorry about...
- Oh, that's okay.
Next time.
Listen, what are you doing New year's Eve?
It's only nine months away.
I'm kidding you.
I'm joking. It's a big joke, huh?
I'm a big comedian.
Well...
Good night, Angie.
Good night, Anthony.
What are you doing?
Where are you going?
I'm old enough.
- Hey, will you stop that.
- No, no, let her go.
You wanna go? Go.
How many years have I got left in this world?
- Go, go, be happy.
- Mamma, she don't mean it.
I mean it! I mean it!
Go, be a mother in America.
Day and night you watch her, day and night.
You take her here, you meet her there.
Your whole life you're waiting in the truck...
...afraid maybe some lunatic
might grab her in the street.
For what? So that she go in the room
with a movie star on a horse?
I don't know. I tell you the truth.
On papa's grave
I don't understand what's so terrible.
What should I say? Go in the street?
Who cares about you?
I care about you. Do me something.
I love you.
Don't love me so much.
- Hey, America...
- I can't breathe.
How can I tell you?
Even if I didn't wanna do anything crazy.
Once, just once, I have to.
I really have to, just to keep from...
choking to death.
What are you talking about?
Every day you meet me in a truck.
What every day?
Three-four times a week you take me to lunch.
You will follow me around on a date,
you pick out on my boyfriends.
It's my job to protect you!
Well then why don't you protect Guido
for a change? Take him the lunch.
- Every night he goes out with all kinds of...
- Guido, Guido, Guido's a boy.
Who cares what he does?
Angelina, bella mia,
I love you.
All right, too much.
Go, go in the world by yourself
in a room.
Go, eat in a drugstore by yourself.
If that's want you want to make you happy...
...find yourself with strangers?
Go!
I'll go see her tomorrow.
We'll have a talk.
I'll find out what's the matter.
Take her out to lunch.
Actually, you know, this looks orange.
Yeah, they call it rust.
Well, you never can tell what
the manufacturer's going to say.
I wonder if you could show me
something else.
- Oh, yeah.
- Thank you, I'd appreciate that.
Hi.
What are you doing here?
What am I doing here?
Would you excuse me one moment, please?
You know how many people
are on the fifth floor at Macy's?
That's all you told me, Macy's,
fifth floor.
- I'm sorry. I thought I told you.
- Fifth floor you told, that's all, you know.
I'm sorry.
Pretty, pretty tweety.
C'mon, bite my finger.
Look, all I came to say was I made you
an appointment Sunday afternoon...
...and I got you a doctor, okay?
I'll write down the address and,
if you want, it's $400.
Got a piece of paper?
Four hundred dollars.
How much can you raise?
Maybe two at the most.
Yeah...
You raise half and I'll try to raise half.
Okay?
I don't know anything about this guy...
...so I'll meet you there 3 o'clock
Sunday afternoon.
Got a piece of paper?
I'm sorry.
Look, if you're not absolutely
sure about this...
...then, I mean, just...
There's only four here.
You'll need another fifty.
- What do you mean, they told me four.
- Right, plus fifty for me.
Yeah? Well I don't have it.
Bring it with you.
Four o'clock.
- But...
- Here's the address.
Third floor, front.
- Yeah, but what happens if I...
- Five minutes late, don't bother coming.
But what happens if I can't go...
Wait a minute!
He says another fifty.
What?
I got thirteen. How much you got?
I think I have about...
...eleven. And some change.
We got about 45 minutes.
You got any ideas?
C'mon.
Where?
To get the money.
All right, lady, drop the gun.
How're you doing, sexy?
Gimme your face to see.
What's the matter?
Postcard once in a year?
Can't you say hello?
Hm? Give me a kiss.
Come on!
Where do you live now?
Milan or someplace, Africa?
Two minutes, you get on a subway,
you pick up the telephone...
Mamma, mamma, I want you to meet
a friend of mine. Angie...
Rossini.
Hi.
Mamma, she's a friend.
Friend? Who says no?
She's an enemy?
Where's poppa?
Where? He's losing the money.
Believe me, they live across the street
by the U.N.
They take everything so serious.
Like my husband.
With the bunch and game? Goodbye, Charlene.
What do you give me, a dollar?
I tell you what he's gonna say.
"What the damn hell, he's home," watch.
Enrico, take my place.
What the damn hell.
- He's home.
- What did I tell you?
He's got a girlfriend.
So what else is new?
Where she work, in a saloon?
- Hey!
- Poppa...
I'm sorry.
I want you to meet a friend of mine,
Angie Rossini.
Excuse my big mouth.
I didn't know he meant a friend in person.
And what I said about the saloon
is because...
...he bring home a girl...
Believe me...
I'd be ashamed to be seen
with the same girl at a party.
Ma questo mascalzone...
...he bring her in the house.
That was ten years ago and he still
put me on a bike.
How're you doing, pop?
- How're you feeling?
- Me, like a horse.
Some horse. He's up all night like a horse
coughing from the cigarette.
Shut up! She talk, eh? Let's take her...
you want something to eat, eh?
- A bottle of wine...
- Si, si, come on, come with me.
How're you doing?
All right?
Okay.
- What do you need, a couple of dollars?
- Can't I come down just to see you, poppa?
Come on, take it, big shot. Take it.
And don't say anything to your mother.
Angie, come on, I want you to meet
some of my friends.
How're you doing, beautiful?
Nothing, not a cent, not a penny,
nothing.
Did I ask? What did I ask?
Rocky.
How are you?
- How've you been?
- Good.
I can't believe it.
Hey, you seen Beetie?
- No, I haven't.
- She's sitting right over there.
Come on over say hello.
Look, I got a couple of things
I gotta do...
Come on, say hello.
It's been a long time.
Beetie, look who's here.
Hi, Maria...
Maria, come here.
How're you doing?
Great.
You're looking great.
I told you not to climb.
Maria.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Hey, she's really big.
You oughta see my older boy.
He's bigger than me.
- My girlfriends are waiting.
- Shut up a minute.
This is Rocky Papasano.
We grew up together.
We went to the same school.
Don't you remember the time I said
thought I saw him...
...on the Lawrence Welk show on television?
Hey, he's been everywhere.
Hollywood, everyplace.
Bye.
Come on eat with us, eh?
- Oh, no, no.
- Oh, come on.
- No, we should stay.
- All right, come on.
Aspetta.
Mamma, I don't need...
Shut up. If you tell your papa,
I break your face.
Oh, no, no.
La signorina prima.
My brother's here.
- Hm?
- My brother's here.
What brother?
In the truck.
Mamma...
What happened?
I have to go, poppa.
Rocky! Rocky!
Guido, go get him.
What're you standing there?
Go get him, go on!
That did it.
I can't even run anymore.
Brothers now.
Quarter to four we're gonna sneak out
the back way and get a cab.
Well, we got the money,
in case you're interested.
Look, I'm gonna leave now.
You don't have to go with me.
I mean it. Just give me the...
...address and tell me where
I'm supposed to go.
Sure, I'm going to let you go
up there alone, huh?
You don't have to worry about protecting me.
Why did you go with me that night
in The Mountains?
Do you mind if I ask you that?
Let's forget about that.
Will you just forget about it?
How do I know why I did it?
I don't know.
I'm just stupid.
It was just a stupid experiment.
The hotel is full of women,
I wind up with Louis Pasteur.
Oh, boy, how they build things up.
In the books, in all the movies.
How the world comes to an end every
time the flame of your lips touches mine.
All I felt was just scared and disgusted
with myself.
Oh, really?
Look, he's insulted.
Don't take it personally.
Thanks.
You uh... you want a little vino?
Man, there's been a lot of vino
under the bridge today.
Just think a pair of nights with a girl.
You know the girl at the park?
My friend the big guy's wife?
You wouldn't believe this.
She's two years younger than me.
Would you believe that?
Man, I hate to come back here.
That girl and I,
we used to break a lot of bread together.
Now we look at each other and
we got nothing to say.
That's what love is?
Bells and banjos play?
How they brainwash you.
And here I spend my whole life like a nut,
waiting for what?
A stranger.
Listen, it's possible.
Don't tell me you believe that.
Well, it's a well-known chemical fact.
Some people, you just have to look at them.
It's kind of kicky.
With other people, chopped liver.
That's true, but...
how come...
You know, my class in high school.
Half a dozen kids,
they couldn't live without each other.
They got married...
...and almost everyone of them now...
...either they're divorced already
or they're miserable.
Well, let's face it. Ever
take a close look at a married man?
Prisoner of Zenda.
Not everybody.
Nine times out of ten.
Maybe.
I don't know.
I used to try to pick out the people
who lived alone
in the subway, in the street...
...and almost everytime they had those...
I don't know, glassy eyes.
Nothing's living in them.
Like...
...I don't know...
...dead.
What are you looking at me for?
Do I look dead to you?
Couldn't resist it.
I don't know.
Hey, you wanna see something?
Come here.
- Is that you?
- Yeah, you like that haircut?
I kinda like the haircut, but those knickers...
Hey, I was a very cool cat.
It seems very funny putting
you together with a family somehow.
What did you think,
I got hatched out of an egg?
In a way they love you.
What are you talking about love?
What's love about it? They're glad to see me?
They haven't seen me for a long time.
Let me hang around here for a couple of months...
...I'll melt right into the wallpaper
just like everybody else.
Love, huh?
That's what makes it rough.
When they love you.
Come in.
Come on.
Come on.
- Move.
- Come on.
Hey, buddy, wait.
You have to wait out here now.
Come on, hurry up.
Get undressed.
Well, come on.
Take it easy.
Are you a doctor?
You said a doctor.
Take it or leave it.
Come on, put your clothes on.
Get your clothes on.
We're gonna get out of here.
Come on.
Come on!
Get your clothes...
Come on, get your clothes on and...
Come on...
Come on... get your clothes on.
Get your clothes on.
I want you to get out of here.
Get your clothes on. Now!
Get your...
- Oh, God...
- Get your clothes on now.
No...
No, no, no, no!
I'll kill them before they can touch you.
I'll kill them...
It's okay,
it's a friend of mine's apartment.
He works nights.
You need some rest.
Hi.
Now knock it off.
It's been a rough morning.
All right, now. Here, eat.
No, no, that's not yours. Here.
No, no, here's yours.
Don't you believe in knocking?
What are you doing here?
Paying the rent, for one thing.
Which brings me to a little Orphan Annie
you parked here.
Incidentally, without my permission.
Number one, which I would not give you,
number two over my dead body.
Take it easy, will you?
I want you to meet a friend of mine.
Dominic Rossini, Barbie Margolies
I'm sorry we kinda busted in on you
like this.
- Oh...
- Where's the girl?
Honey, would you put some coffee on, hm?
Well, it's a lovely day, isn't it?
- Angela...
- I gotta talk...
I have to tell you, Angie, I...
When he told me my whole stomach
turned over on me.
I mean it. I'll tell you the truth,
I can't believe it.
Anyhow, we had a long talk.
And the thing is,
he came to me like a man.
And he's willing to marry you.
Why?
I know you're embarrassed
by the stupid way he put it, but...
I'm not embarrassed. I'd like to know.
- What do you mean stupid?
- Stupid, you're stupid.
- You're calling me stupid?
- Why don't you cool it?
Will you stop that?
Sit down.
The both of you.
The both of you, will you sit down?
Do you want to get married?
I said I would, didn't I?
That's not what I asked you.
Well, who wants to get married?
You mean, even though you
don't wanna marry me...
...you're willing to do it anyway?
Well...
I'm just as much to blame as you are.
More, it was my fault the whole thing and
I'm willing to take my medicine.
That's really wonderful.
And I'm the medicine, right?
I know this may come as a great big shock
to the both of you...
...but underneath all this hair and skin
is a human girl.
With all the regular things going for me.
Believe it or not.
I don't wanna spend the rest of my life married
to a man who's doing me a big favor.
- What did I say?
- What are you talking about?
All right, I made one mistake.
And it was a beaut.
But that doesn't mean I have to ruin
my whole life, and his, and the baby's.
The man is willing to marry you.
What do you want?
I don't want to be a warden all my life.
The Prisoner of Zenda?
Look...
I appreciate what you're willing to do.
I mean that.
I really mean it.
But as long as you feel like
being married is being in jail...
...then you won't be happy, right?
So if you're not happy,
then you take it out on me.
And then I'm not happy.
And if you're not happy, then I'm not happy,
and the baby's not happy.
Who needs a house full of unhappy people?
Where are you going?
I don't know. I gotta get out of here.
I'm gonna be late for work.
You wanna hear me say
I wanna get married?
All right.
I wanna get married.
I'm only trying to be honest with you.
Tell the truth.
If I said okay, your teeth would fall out?
Right or wrong?
Dominic, I really owe you an apology,
you know.
I really do.
All this time I've been blaming you
for everything.
You ruining my life and all that.
Well, that's over now.
You know why I've never been able
to leave home?
I just suddenly figured it out.
Very complicated.
I was scared.
And I'm not scared anymore.
I'm terrified. Funny?
Well, listen.
Thank you Barbie for the use
of the Teddy bear.
Coffee anyone?
All my life sacrificing myself to have her
away like this.
- She'll come back...
- Nonsense!
I understand how you feel Mrs Rossini.
But in this country it isn't
considered unusual...
...for a girl to want an apartment of her own.
There's a little more to it
than just wanting an apartment...
Sure, tell him. Tell the whole world.
Why don't you put it in the paper.
Mamma, we asked him to come here
to help.
He's a priest, Ma.
In the church he's a priest. In my house
he don't have to know everything.
- All right, mamma, you rest now.
- Yes, yes, in my grave I'm gonna rest.
It's like a stab in my heart.
- Take it easy, mamma.
- Go away! Leave me alone!
In my grave I'm gonna rest.
Hey, don't forget...
What we're trying to do...
is there any way you can make a person
get married if they don't wanna?
There must be a law or something.
Look, there's no law.
I told you before, you can't force a person
to get married.
Look, I'll bury you.
Get him out of here.
Not in front of the priest.
Get out of here.
Go out to the kitchen. Sit down.
You can force somebody to pay upkeep,
or something like that...
...but you can't force somebody to get married.
My son, often in this world you'll find...
...that the law of man comes second
to the law of God.
- And the individual conscience of man...
- Look, Father, I...
Admit your guilt, my child,
and face the full responsibility.
I'm willing to get married.
She won't.
- But didn't you say...
- She don't wanna.
I'll tell you what she wants.
She wants bells and banjos.
- Banjos?
- What banjos?
You want me to tell you something?
What am I doing here?
I was willing to do my part.
She didn't want me.
Right?
Good luck. From now on it's your problem.
- From now on it's your problem.
- Hey, wait a minute.
- Listen, just for a minute.
- No.
Wait a minute, just a second.
What a shame! What a shame.
What have I done to deserve this?
Hey, Angie!
- Hi.
- How are you?
Fine.
- How are you?
- Fine.
That's fine.
How're you doing in your little room
and everything?
Who said it's a little room?
It's two rooms and a half.
Mom's in bed, you know.
We had a doctor and everything.
I think she lost the will to live.
Dom, she'll live.
Listen, I gotta run. I'll see you, okay?
Taxi!
- Maybe we could have some lunch or something?
- What?
I said maybe we could have lunch
or something.
I can't, Dom.
I got an appointment.
Taxi.
Who with?
The beauty parlor.
Okay, what for?
Hey, taxi!
What you got?
A date or something?
Maybe.
Who have you got a date with?
Taxi.
Do I know him?
Where did you meet him?
Can't you tell me who he is, at least?
Rock Hudson.
On a horse.
So I'm lucky I fell on my,
you know, wrist.
- I know this lady lives on the Avenue...
- The cake is almost, you know.
And she was walking down the,
you know, street...
...and she fell down and broke something...
...in her back something...
...and now she can't move both her,
you know, legs.
Excuse me, I better see if the, you know...
- Anthony.
- Oh...
If I could see what I'm eating,
I could eat.
Oh, mamma, leave it romantic.
It's romantic enough.
Excuse me, I'll go see if I can help.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Hot.
Careful, it's hot.
I'll do it.
Did you tell your mother?
I haven't told her yet.
But I'm going to.
I'm gonna tell her what uh...
I'm gonna tell her about the uh...
you know, the baby, and uh...
Well... only... what I'm gonna tell her is...
I'm gonna tell her that I'm the...
You know, the father.
Get some butter.
Cold water.
Butter, will you get the butter?
- It's all right. It's fine.
- You sure?
- You hurt yourself.
- No, no!
- No, it's nothing.
- You sure?
- Yes.
- Sit down. I'll help him.
No, I'd like to, really.
I love to help in the kitchen.
What are you gonna help.
There's nothing to help.
Both of you, sit.
All of you, you know, come on, sit down.
Too many cooks spoil the, you know...
...the broth.
Better have a doctor check that hand.
Oh, my goodness. Very sorry.
Nine out of ten accidents happen in the home.
It's statistics.
This is really a lovely room.
You have wonderful taste.
What you've done to this apartment.
Okay!
I'm ready!
Readier.
I'm uh... you know.
Anthony.
Oh, it's beautiful.
Just beautiful.
What's the idea?
Well, I thought that... you know,
like uh...
like the 4th of July, huh?
Big joke, huh?
Mamma... when Anthony gets married
you will not be losing a son.
Somebody will be gaining a cook.
it's... er...
College girl. Going to college.
You'll have to excuse my mother.
She's anti-education at the present moment.
Ever since I told her I was taking
a course in love.
A course in love?
Not really, it's just part of a course.
I only say that to agitate them.
The concept is that love...
...taken on the mature level
as opposed to the uh...
...erotic, or the so-called romantic,
with all its false conceptions, is really an art.
And like every other art,
it demands practice and patience...
...consistent dedication and hard work.
I believe that.
I really do.
Well, of course.
Now, how can any intelligent person
in this age of reason...
...make the most important selection of his
life merely on the basis of some kind of...
...vague sexual attraction?
Of course.
I mean, if two people just start out being
nice to each other...
...if they're just concerned about
what happens to each other...
...that's all...
...and they're just nice...
then I think it happens.
Don't you?
- What do you mean?
- Love.
I mean, what they call being in love.
I think that love, actually...
...as such...
...is strictly a middle-class idea.
And it is definitely on its way out.
Yes, I think so too.
Actually.
I mean, I don't think that love
is something that you...
...fall into. Like a hole in the ground.
Now, if a person is even halfway mature...
...when you consider the enormous
responsibilities involved in marriage...
...you can't take it lightly.
You can't.
Knowing that the future generation...
...is entirely due to the wisdom
of your procreation.
Of course.
- You want the...
- Sorry.
I just don't know what is the matter with me.
I'll get a towel... you know, wipe it.
Don't worry about the dress, I'm just...
...worried about the dinner table.
That's all right.
We're only lucky it wasn't, you know,
hot coffee.
Oh, it's terrible. I'm so sorry.
She's not a bad-looking girl.
But she's so clumsy.
Hi.
Oh, hi.
How're you doing?
Fine.
I was in the neighborhood...
...so I thought I'd drop up see
how you were making out.
Oh...
So, how's everything?
Fine.
No, I mean the problem.
Fine.
What do you mean fine?
Would you excuse me just a minute, please?
Listen, what time do you get off?
Let's have a cup of coffee or something.
Will you excuse me a minute?
Well, what do you say?
Shall I pick you up after?
Oh, I can't tonight.
Uh, all right, well uh...
Tomorrow then, okay?
I'll pick you up after or what?
No, I can't tomorrow night either.
Oh. What do you mean you can't?
It's a cup of coffee.
I've got a date.
With who?
What's funny?
If I didn't know better, I'd swear
you're my brother Dominic.
Look. I just wanted to see you
that's all.
See how you feel and see how you're making out.
So, fine, I saw you.
And everything's fine, so...
...fine.
Oh.
Listen...
Do you want to make it Monday?
Monday, what am I supposed to do?
Wait around until Monday?
Hey, Angie, when you get a minute.
All right, I'll meet you Monday.
I'll see you Monday.
Come here a minute.
Look, why don't you come
to my place Sunday?
I'll make dinner.
I'll take you out to dinner.
Don't you want to see my new apartment?
You want me to?
If you want to.
Okay, you got a deal.
Sunday.
Oh, wait a minute.
- You don't know where I live.
- Oh, East 11th street.
Just a minute.
Hi. Come on in.
Hi.
Man, do you look wild.
- Thank you.
- No, I mean it,
I really mean it.
- Look how surprised he sounds.
- You look so...
What am I gonna tell you?
You look like a woman.
How can you manage to make even
a compliment sound like a slap in the face?
What did I say?
You look like a woman.
I apologize, excuse me.
You look like man.
Do you wanna fight all day?
Who's fighting? I don't wanna fight.
All right, then. Sit down.
I'll make you a drink.
I don't know what it is.
First time in my life I come to see a girl
and I feel like I'm 14 years old.
Even when I was 14 I didn't feel
like that.
They're beautiful.
Thank you.
What would you like to drink?
Scotch, I don't know.
What do you got?
Scotch, gin, bourbon, vodka...
What are you, on the sauce now?
I thought you didn't drink.
- I don't.
- What are you running here? The USO?
Would you like a drink?
Thank you.
- Scotch?
- Thank you.
Water, soda or tonic?
Scotch and tonic?
Uh, very good.
Zelda,
Gin and tonic, yes.
Vodka and tonic, yes.
Scotch and tonic, no.
Water.
Thank you.
You gotta know these things
if you're gonna run...
...a respectable den of inequity.
I'll learn in my own little way.
You know something,
I'll tell you the truth.
You're kind of okay, I mean that.
I know you think I'm putting
you on, but I'm not.
I mean it.
Any other girl in your situation...
Look, will you do me a favor?
Don't pay me any more compliments.
All I'm trying to tell you is
I think you're pretty great, that's all.
You didn't ask anybody for anything...
...you didn't sit around
feeling sorry for yourself.
I think you're something.
I mean that.
And I just wanted to tell you.
Thank you.
Is it all right?
The way you like it?
Delicious.
Really?
No, I mean it. It's delicious.
It is kind of a test run for me.
The man I'm going out with is
in the restaurant business.
And so before I cook for him...
Anything I can do to help, lady.
Would you like some?
So tell me...
How have you been?
Who me?
Great, just great.
That's wonderful.
Yeah, I'm filling in for a friend of mine
every once in a while over in Radio City.
He's quitting the business, going to open up
a used car lot in New Jersey.
Said I could have a job there
if I wanted to.
Permanently.
Really.
That's wonderful.
Wonderful?
Five days a week, rain or shine,
in sickness or health, who needs it?
I go where the wind blows me.
If I don't wanna go to work,
I don't have to go to work.
And I can stay in bed all day long
if I want to.
So wonderful. You're happy.
Well, I am.
I really am.
Nice place you got here.
It really is.
You can see you put a lot
of yourself in it.
Little things here and there.
Very nice.
You made it very nice.
You know something?
If you didn't try so hard
to play against it...
...you could be a pretty decent
kind of a person.
Look how surprised she sounds.
What do you think you're doing?
- As if I didn't know.
- Come here, Louis.
Louis?
A new kind of experiment.
Don't.
You better understand something
here and now.
What we did before,
that was something happened...
...don't ask me how or why,
but it's not gonna happen again.
Why not?
Don't you understand?
I didn't know you then.
I didn't care about you.
I know you now.
I like you.
Man, I end up with a...
Look. Why don't you sit down?
I invited you to dinner.
Let's have dinner.
Tell me something.
That cook...
That friend of yours
in the restaurant business.
Do you like him too,
the way you like me now?
Or do you not care about him the way
you used to not care about me?
What are you, some kind of a nut?
Thank you so much for dropping in.
I'm sorry you had to leave so early.
Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I didn't mean... I made a bad joke.
Dead, dead. You're dead.
Wait a minute.
Look! I've got a man who wants
to get married.
And he wants to get married to me.
And if I don't hear the bells and the banjos
ringing everytime I look at him...
I can just live without the bells
and the banjos.
Cause I don't hear them when I look
at you either.
- Listen, Angie.
- Will you get away from me, please.
Just get away from me.
And stay away from me.
I don't want to see you anymore, ever.
Go, go where the wind blows you.
Hey, Angie!
And if you think you're such a big prize
talking to every girl in the world...
...who's out to trap you.
Now wait a minute, will you?
Hey, come on, Angie.
Let me in, will you?
Angie.