1
Welcome.
Baby, let's go to the room and have fun.
No, I am enjoying this.
Where is General Zeng?
General Zeng!
General Zeng!
General Zeng! General Zeng!
Zeng!
We are under pressure
form the foreign ministry.
We'll have to send our best officers.
I'm sending G. S. Gupta and A. L. Sharma
right away.
Let's go, sir.
Stay back.
Let's go, sir.
So, Dr. Vardhi, shall we begin?
Recognize this?
It's me.
I certainly can recognize myself.
And your partner as well?
Raghu.
What are you two doing
with General Zeng in this photo?
Are we not allowed to click
pictures with the Chinese?
This is the Chinese Government's
high profile case.
If proven that he was murdered here
then India will lose face in the UN.
He was here.
What is this?
This is Tiger Soup.
He says that Tiger's body parts
are mixed in it.
I don't handle the manufacturing.
Okay then,
let's call the one who does.
Let's ask him.
Where is Raghu hiding?
It's a tough job that you guys do.
You need to go through so many files.
Then, in every case--
Sir, be quiet.
You will only talk when
he questions you. Okay?
Where is Raghu?
No idea, son.
Son?
I am no relative of yours.
Come to the point.
Where is Raghu hiding?
Since when have you been
selling this Tiger Soup?
Since the time Raghu
came back from China.
And why did Raghu go to China?
We searched his house.
We couldn't find anything.
We did find birds which
look like ostriches.
Emu.
It's called Emu.
Emu?
Yes. Raghu is a--
What do you call that in English? Enter...
No, another word for a businessman.
Sharma, it's enter...
Yes, that's what Raghu is.
Raghu has already tried
13 business ideas before this.
Selling its eggs is
a very profitable business.
At a five-star hotel,
each egg sells for 5000.
Hey, I am a vegetarian!
So what?
Raghu used to say
that a businessman sells ideas
whereas an entrepreneur makes ideas.
All his ideas were great.
But unfortunately,
none of them worked.
Square watermelons, sir.
100 percent organic.
I used the Japanese technique
to grow them.
It can easily fit into any refrigerator.
And there's a heart-shaped one
for valentine's day.
What is this nonsense?
Get it out of here.
No matter how many
of his ideas flopped,
he was always confident that his
next idea would certainly be a hit.
It's still a little raw, but...
But it works.
Give me another one.
It works.
He's very positive in life.
Die, Raghu! Time to die!
I am Spiderman and
you are just a businessman.
Die!
-Rukmani!
-Yes?
Take him away.
Go.
-Chintu!
-Why are you pushing me?
Mummy, Raghu isn't getting up.
Hail the holy cow!
I paid the bill.
Thanks.
I've told you to use the other lights.
-It will reduce the bill.
-I'll do it next month.
Where are you going?
Have a seat.
I'm getting late.
Doesn't matter.
Eat some dessert before you leave.
Serve him some.
Those days, we were
selling Nepalese carpets.
But it was progressing
at a "Ghongha" speed.
Do you know what "Ghongha" is?
-Yes, "Ghongha."
-It means a snail.
Nepalese carpets.
Best carpets in the world.
Use this and you won't feel cold.
Get green tea for them.
Ginger or honey?
Just get it.
What a fool!
Raghu's father kept telling him
to join the family business.
But he never listened to him.
And when he finally did,
the business went bust.
Now he keeps listening to Mr. Chopra.
Your dreams are not like junk food.
Don't undervalue them.
Natukaka!
Those who undervalue their dreams...
are just like sheep.
They become a part of the crowd.
You are filled with
a volcano of possibilities.
You can be Dhirubhai Ambani.
You can be Laxmi Mittal.
But this crowd wants
you to sit in a cubical.
It wants you to join
the family business.
This crowd has built
a wall around you.
It always keeps reminding you that
you are worthless, and average.
You can break this wall.
Break this wall, do it.
Devraj isn't my partner.
Devraj is my friend.
Not even a friend,
he's more like a brother.
And to all of you.
What is life?
It's a very big WhatsApp group
with God as its admin.
So keep forwarding happiness and
your life's data will stay unlimited.
Goodnight!
After these kind words from Mr. Chopra
we have a performance by
Mr. Mehta's daughter-in-law.
"My veil flies away."
Mrs. Rukmani,
please come on the stage.
My veil
My veil flies away
Come, let's dance.
My veil, I try to hold it down But it
flies away
My veil, I try to hold it down
But it flies away
With the wind, it flies away
It makes my heart skip a beat
With the wind, it flies away
It makes my heart skip a beat
It makes my heart sigh
My veil, I try to hold it down
But it flies away
Let the veil fly away
Let the veil fly away
She is your wife.
You can stare at her later.
Let's go. Dad is calling you.
Come here. Take this.
-Having a good time, Bhide?
-Thoroughly.
Enjoying yourself.
-Hello.
-Hi.
Did you take a tour of our new house?
-Well...
-Or, did you come here for free dinner?
No, I saw it, it's nice.
It's nice.
Chagan?
-Yes, sir?
-What is this?
Cake.
Stupid, even I can see that.
Is it with eggs or without eggs in it?
-Sir, you told me--
-Listen.
I am the trustee of Hatkeshwar temple.
I don't eat cakes
which have eggs in them.
Take it away.
Keep it down.
-Take this away as well.
-Okay, sir.
How much did you make today?
-Thousand?
1200!
1200!
What's 20 percent of that?
240!
Great.
Amazing.
So...
what's new?
I have a few new ideas in mind.
Where are you going?
-I'll go check on Chintu.
-Sit. Chintu!
He isn't going anywhere.
Sit down.
Dad, it's okay, he's trying.
What the hell is he trying?
No one is going to buy your
Nepalese carpets in Navrang Pura.
A margin of only 20-30 bucks,
you call this a business?
How will you pay Chintu's school fees?
I'm handling Chintu's school fees.
Why don't you talk
some sense into him?
Meet Bhide.
Bhide is interested in your shop.
When do you want to finalize the deal?
-But the shop--
-Shut up.
When do you want to finalize the deal?
Do you want me to sell my
father's shop and stay at home?
No.
Just castrate the new ideas
that keep popping into your mind.
Look.
Join Devraj in his new business.
An Ayurvedic products' company
worth 1200 million.
We need reliable family members
to join the family business.
Listen.
He is going to China next week.
You should go with him.
Try your luck.
What will I do in China, Dad?
-My shop--
-Come with me to China.
I'll introduce you to a few investors.
But China--
Don't be so scared of China.
I am not sending you
to Kavakistan or Syria.
It's only China.
Bhide, let's have some desserts.
I'll drop you to the airport.
Digestive?
No? Let's go.
Rukmani, I'm sending him to China.
Do you have a passport?
Yes.
You don't need anything else then.
Come on.
Rukmani.
I am not going to China.
Why did you have to agree?
Do you want to tear my shirt?
Rukmani, China?
Do you know how far it is?
-The door.
-Okay.
Do you know how far China is?
I heard they eat snakes there.
Then you too can have one.
I don't know why
you always overreact.
I overreact.
You don't even do that.
Don't do anything.
I'll go back home, to Mumbai.
Stop with your threats
of going back to Mumbai.
-Emu's offspring, Jamway's agency--
-Eggs.
Whatever! Emu's eggs!
Jamway's agency, roti maker.
Did I ever complain?
I have always encouraged you.
And I am trying.
What's so special about China?
They sell cheap quality products.
There's nothing special there.
You'll get another
opportunity in China, Raghu.
I have to hear this because
I am going through a bad phase.
You know what Mr. Chopra said?
As they say, it's the darkest before dawn.
We are going through that darkness.
Do one thing, Raghu.
Go screw yourself.
Language, Rukmani!
Chintu might hear you.
Fine, I'll wash the clothes.
I wonder where you
learn all this from.
Rukmani, China?
Why don't you come with me?
We'll go there and have chow mein.
O dear, do buy something for me
From the fair
But do come soon, O darling
You are an ocean of love
I am thirsty, O dear
Do come soon
How can your beloved be so handsome?
My mirror questions me
How could I be so fortunate?
I still cannot believe my luck
I keep warding the evil away
I keep you hidden away
May no harm come to you
I love you
Like I have never loved before
If I don't love you with all my heart
It's not love
I love you
Like I have never loved before
O dear, do buy something for me
From the fair
But do come soon, O darling
Tell me something, Rukmani.
Even after so many failures...
do you still love me?
I have never made
A special wish until now
But yet,
Our stars united
In the sky somehow
I keep warding the evil away
I keep you hidden away
May no harm come to you
I love you
Like I have never loved before
If I don't love you with all my heart
It's not love
O dear, do buy something for me
From the fair
But do come soon, O darling
I am your love nest, O flying bird
Do come soon
You know Aunt Dhaani?
Raghu's neighbor?
Raghu treats her like his mother.
She has weak eyesight.
Raghu later...
Sir! This conversation will
only lead to me having a migraine.
-When I was small, I fell...
-Sir.
Raghu is here.
You arrested him?
No, he surrendered.
Sir.
Raghu is here.
Tea?
So?
I am calm because you came to me.
So, tell me.
What does this contain?
Normal stuff, sir.
Milk, sugar, cream.
And a Chinese tiger's part?
By part, you mean penis?
No, sir.
Why would anyone mix a Chinese
tiger's penis in a medicine?
And for that matter, why would
anyone mix any body part in it?
Then did you go to
China to have chow mein?
I didn't go to China willingly, sir.
I was forced to.
Tell me everything.
I wasn't too eager to go to China.
I was forced to.
The only positive aspect
of it was Rukmani's hope,
that with the blessings
of the Chinese dragon
I'll surely find
a new business idea there.
Wait here,
I'll go and confirm the booking.
-Done?
-There's a problem.
They don't have enough rooms.
I have booked you
a room in another hotel.
You just learnt that?
How will I stay alone?
Do you have a problem?
-No.
-It's a nice hotel.
It's called the Dancing Dragon.
It's in that lane, not too far away.
They have a small-eyed
dinosaur placed outside the door.
Be careful about what you eat.
Most of the food here has meat in it.
Sparrows, crows, ducks.
They eat everything.
Even their fruits aren't
considered vegetarian.
-I have brought thepla.
-Good.
Stick to thepla.
Thepla is good for health.
Xui Lee!
Be ready by 8 tonight.
We are meeting a successful investor.
-When?
-At 8.
Julie.
Xui Lee.
Julie.
Xui...
Ju...
Never mind.
I have prepared some notes for you.
Memorize them.
Go and say it in the
ayurvedic shops nearby.
But it's in Chinese.
What does it mean?
Why do you want to know the meaning?
They will know what it means.
Memorize it and say it.
Okay?
Go.
Go to your hotel now.
Hello, my name is Raghu Mehta.
I am here to sell
you JeevanSutra products.
We have...
We have a range of organic
Ayurvedic products from India.
I also have the samples.
Samples.
I also have the samples.
What a language!
Mr. Chopra always says, never
treat your struggle as a challenge.
Hello, my name is Raghu Mehta.
I am here to sell
you JeevanSutra products.
It is an opportunity.
It can take you very far.
You can never get close
to success without any struggle.
I was treating my struggle
as an opportunity.
Yet, my condition was worse
than a Jamway's salesman.
Ashwagandha.
It's known as winter cherry in America
and poison gooseberry in London.
They sell it as a
sports performance drug.
China's sports energy drink's
market is worth 350 million dollars.
We should sell Ashwagandha
as an Indian herbal sports drink.
There is a lot of scope.
Ash Bull.
You asked me to come all the
way from India to say this?
Dev?
-Should I...
-Do as you please.
Thepla.
You're a Gujarati?
Give me one.
Really?
Here.
Take two of these.
Thepla is like God, for a Gujarati.
Especially in China.
Raghuveer Mehta.
Nepal handicraft business.
Ahmadabad.
Your brother?
I'm leaving.
Let me know if you need any help.
Your card?
Forget it!
I have tried 13 businesses so far.
I tried selling a lot of things,
but in vain.
Come on.
Indian delicacy, thepla.
Thepla?
Thepla.
Tanmay, you sold thepla
like it was the Kohinoor.
-Tanmay?
-Yes?
Why?
No one has ever called
me an entrepreneur.
And today, you did.
I have a gut feeling that someday,
you will be a successful entrepreneur.
Once you understand
the concept of "The Key"!
The concept of "The Key"?
Who is the customer?
The customer is an idiot.
The customer is an idiot.
What is he?
-How can I say that?
-You'll have to repeat it.
Say it.
-The customer is an idiot.
-The customer is an idiot.
And why so?
Why so?
Don't repeat that.
I am asking you.
-Okay.
-Why so?
-Why?
-I don't know.
Because the customer is naive.
-I see.
-He doesn't know what he wants.
You need to tell him that.
How?
-By singing a song.
-A song?
-By singing a song.
-Which song?
Tell me, oh naive one, what do you want?
Say it.
"Trimurti" directed by Subhash Ghai!
Tell me, oh naive one, what do you want?
Tell me, oh naive one, what do you want?
No, no. With vigor!
Tell me, oh naive one, what do you want?
Tell me, oh naive one, what do you want?
-I am a lover...
-Hey!
What happens after you sing the song?
The customer will
tell me what he wants.
But the customer is...
-Oh yes, he is an idiot.
-Yes.
He'll tell you shit.
He won't tell you.
The customer only shows.
His need.
He shows us his need.
What's the customer's need?
Inexpensive goods, good quality goods?
The customer's need is the lock.
A lock.
A lock?
The customer's need is the lock.
And the day you find the key...
you'll be an entrepreneur.
The key!
Tanmay,
you can keep these theplas.
Where is your brother?
I knocked for so long how come it took
so long for you to open the door?
Where is your brother?
I don't understand. Talk in English.
My whole life...
Where is he?
Keep it down.
Don't do this to me, okay?
I beg you.
Listen to me.
Alcohol?
You, me, alcohol?
That's great! You speak Hindi!
-Alcohol?
-Alcohol?
China's Falguni Pathak.
After two drinks I eat egg.
Boiled is urine?
What kind of a place is this?
You guys eat anything!
You will also eat shit
for dessert with some sugar in it.
I didn't show you my wife's picture.
Rukmani.
I came to China because of her.
I want to keep her happy.
She has suffered a lot because of me.
Look Rukmani, they boil eggs in urine.
Julie Ben, a song dedicated to you.
I am an angel
Don't touch me
I am an angel
I am an angel
I am an angel
Julie! Julie! Julie!
Come here! Come here!
Come here! Come here!
-Julie Ben.
-Come here.
You know, "Ben" means sister.
-Julie Ben.
-Julie Ben.
You have a good life here.
For me it's only home
to office and office to home.
What?
Aoli? I don't know any Aoli.
I'll meet him, Julie Ben.
No worries.
Aoli?
We are already here.
Yes. Okay.
Bye.
Hurry up! What's wrong!
We don't have time to wait!
Put it down here!
Oh, roar.
Be mindful.
Be mindful!
Be mindful.
Yes, good boy.
Be mindful.
What's the most powerful thing
in this world?
Our mind.
Because it a pot full of ideas.
All great ideas develop here.
From Jumbo King to Jumbo Jet,
from Pan Parag to Panasonic.
All great ideas developed here.
We Indians think about sex 24/7.
But we never talk about it.
We don't mention it.
Our country is the biggest
"crowd" in the world.
And "sex" is its biggest need.
According to Tanmay
the customer's need is the lock.
Hao Li had shown me
"the key" to that lock.
What are you looking at?
Nothing.
It's been quite long.
Let's do it.
-Come on.
-Yes.
Careful there.
Rukmani?
Just asking.
Are you happy with me?
Yes, I am happy.
No.
Not that kind of happy.
By happy, I mean, content.
-Are you referring to the milkman?
-No.
I mean satisfaction.
I know. I went to
an English medium school.
What are you trying to say?
Okay.
Tell me, when we...
-When we what? Fight?
-No!
When we do it at night
and sometimes during the day.
Yes, sex.
Do I make you happy?
Do you reach the top floor?
I am serious.
Why are you laughing?
I reach the top floor
and even enjoy the view.
So the lift's working properly.
The lift and the lift man's
working perfectly.
But good, I am happy that you asked.
In fact, there are husbands
who don't satisfy their wives.
I wonder what they do.
Rukmani, there are so many husbands
who are unable to satisfy their wives.
You know how many kinds
of problems men face?
Premature ejaculation, inhibited
ejaculation, retrograde ejaculation,
wet dreams, mistakes made
during adolescence, impotency,
low sperm count, low sexual desire,
erectile dysfunction.
But there are medicines for
all these problems. And toys too.
You have done a lot of
research about these things.
It is a very big market.
Lots of money in it.
Maybe, so what?
There are many inappropriate
products available in the market.
You should concentrate
on your carpets' market.
Come on, let's go for a smoke.
Yes, carpets.
I got the hint that my 21st-century wife's
liberated side
was restricted to secretly
smoking with her husband.
Erectile dysfunction.
Viagra, tadalafil,
sildenafil, levitra, vardenafil.
They sell like hotcakes.
What medicine are you going to supply?
Have you heard about tiger soup?
What?
It's made from the tiger's penis.
Hang up.
You think this is funny?
Are you high on some cheap drug?
You'll get us into trouble.
One thing was for certain.
To find a genuine solution to the
problems men faced, was also a problem.
And the problem
of getting it to the people.
Raman, please advise me,
how do I approach this business?
-What are you saying?
-And for that
you'll need to make
a hakim, an astrologist
or a good doctor your partner.
Partnership.
But remember, there are many charlatans
in this line of business as well.
Understood?
Raman was absolutely right.
To find a true and honest
partner in this field
was like finding a
needle in a haystack.
What's the secret?
What's got you so upset?
My parrot has a solution for everything
Due to mistakes made during
adolescence, I face some issues.
I cannot satisfy my wife.
Is there a solution?
Do you play?
Play?
Play!
Stop playing with it.
Okay.
Any medicines?
That is the only solution.
We'll need do some x-rays.
A full body check
up will also be done.
We have a special machine,
red light, green light.
If we get a green light,
then medicines can cure it.
But if it's a red light then...
There's nothing to worry about,
but we'll have to do an angioplasty.
It's not fractured.
Take this.
We'll have to take control
of your mind and body for a month.
We'll have to keep you
subjugated for another month.
Physical issues, weakness,
family issues, dissatisfaction.
Everything will get cured.
Drink this solution.
You and your wife will be surprised
with the results after two months.
What will happen?
Mind-blowing, amazing sex!
Isn't he great?
He'll harden everything.
Do I have to take a right turn?
Roti, thepla, they are round in shape.
Have triangular foodstuff.
I have been having
samosas since childhood.
With green chutney?
-Yes.
-Try red chutney instead.
All your sex-related
problems will get cured.
Stay blessed.
Why have they still not
filed his papers, his IT Returns?
I don't know what's happening.
I'll go outside and check.
Jagdesh.
You may go inside.
You have insomnia.
You sleep less than
seven hours at night?
Yes.
You drink before you sleep?
You smoke?
Sometimes, a cigarette.
No.
You don't have a problem.
You don't need a sexologist.
You only have insomnia.
Understand.
No fees.
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
You believed me when I said
that you don't have a problem.
This means you know that
you don't have a problem.
Why did you come here?
I came to check whether you are a fake
like the other sexologists.
So, did I pass?
-Absolutely.
-Okay, go.
I have an amazing offer for you.
I want you to be my business partner.
I have a product that
can cure sex-related problems.
My product, your patients
and we will split the profit.
What do you think?
See this goat?
Prabha.
She calms me down when I get angry.
But she gets angry very easily.
I'd suggest you leave
before she gets angry.
Go.
Leave!
One last thing.
Your column in the newspaper.
Do people really ask these questions,
or you just make them up for fun?
Prabha!
I'm leaving, I'm leaving.
Jagdesh!
Mr. Vardhi's book made
one thing very clear.
Our country lies in darkness
when it comes to sex education.
And only people like Dr. Vardhi
can guide us.
Sir!
What are you doing here?
Do you come here every day?
I come here every day.
This is the first time
I am seeing you here.
I jog on the other side every day.
-You jog?
-Yes, five miles.
-In slippers?
-Sports slippers.
Hi, Prabha! How are you?
Ignore him, Prabha.
Stay away...
Stay away from her.
Kick him.
-What happened?
-Can't get it started.
Keep trying.
The carburetor must be clogged.
Can I drop you home?
I have read your book.
You are very honest and genuine.
I have met 25 doctors
19 hakims, 12 astrologists and
4 thugs in the past two months.
All of them were fake.
They'll go to Khajuraho.
They'll secretively
read the Kamasutra.
But they won't tell anyone
when they have a problem.
The one who sells snacks
outside your clinic
makes more than you made in 50 years.
Do you know why?
Because while all troubled husbands are
in your clinic waiting for their turn
their wives eat
his snacks to kill time.
I know your true worth.
You are precious.
Everyone,
this country, this world needs you.
We need each other.
You will benefit from our partnership.
You'll be able to open two more
clinics like these in three months.
Three clinics?
I don't want to see you
anywhere close to me again.
They are sexologists?
You bloody...
Get him, Prabha! Get him!
Is doing business a piece of cake?
Is it so easy?
Is it simple? Is it easy?
Sit over there.
If it was so easy, then
anybody could have done it.
You could have done it.
What is this?
You took all the money
out of the account?
Why?
I am trying to start a business.
What business, Raghu?
Our carpet business is doing well.
Oh, really?
What's our income?
What are you doing, Raghu?
Dev only pays his school fees.
We have other expenses
to take care of.
-From where do I get the money?
-In front of Chintu...
Chintu, just step outside.
Chintu won't go anywhere.
Stay there, Chintu.
-Rukmani, I...
-I am fed up of all this.
I am done, Raghu.
I cannot keep borrowing money.
This is my last warning.
I want to return this book.
-It's rubbish.
-What happened, sir?
-This man is useless.
-Who?
Tribhuvan Vardhi.
Jayraj, this is a library.
Please maintain silence.
Keep your voice down.
You are in a library.
I am not yelling.
I am keeping my voice down.
He studied in different parts of the
world. He gained a lot of knowledge.
But what did he do with the knowledge?
What did he do?
He used to apply his knowledge
in Uganda, but he was asked to leave.
He has opened up a small clinic here.
He treats 20 patients every day.
There are at least 2 million people
who need him.
Pay attention.
Someone wants to help him,
but he doesn't want to change.
These people have a problem.
They refuse to listen.
This is not due to their
old age, but their ego.
It's not so.
He's well respected.
And what does this
respect get him, peanuts?
He's someone who doesn't
follow his own principles.
Read what's written in here.
Louder.
Yes, share.
Knowledge is a form of wealth
that increases when shared.
So it is important to share it.
Look, I am a businessman.
I took the book to get motivated.
I ended up getting depressed instead.
I have a carpet shop
on the Ashram road.
Do come, I'll give you a discount.
-No, thanks.
-Please come.
I am not selfish.
I think about everyone.
Public service.
My phone number is on the card.
If you didn't get anything from China,
then what is in that soup?
Milk, cream and sugar.
Raghu, you have got a parcel
from China. I've kept it inside.
There is a secret behind
every successful business.
This secret is worth millions
only as long as it remains a secret.
THE NEXT CHAPTER...
What's the update on
Zeng's autopsy, Sharma?
No autopsy yet, sir.
Why?
Indian Government wants to
release the body only after an autopsy.
The Chinese government wants
to do the autopsy in China.
All the reports are on hold, sir.
So we keep at it?
We are screwed, sir.
Let's go.
At least wash your hands.
Oh, yeah.
What's wrong with you, sweetheart?
Start working, love.
Hey! Sit down!
Chinese hunter Shambu
has been arrested.
He has killed 63 tigers.
He's wanted by the Interpol.
Sir, I met him just once.
I don't even know what he does.
Oh, really?
He had sent you a courier from China.
This is your address, right?
What was that?
-Courier?
-What was in that courier?
This is all so fucked up!
What the hell, man!
A goat rear, an emu egg seller
meet a hunter who has killed 63 tigers,
they get the tiger's penis here
and put it in their soup
which ends up killing China's General.
Sharma, even the irony is screwed here.
They are screwing with us, sir.
Tell me something, how can you pull
such stunts from Ahmadabad?
Sharma.
They are businessmen.
They can do frauds anywhere
in the world, only to return here.
We are the fools who waste
our lives giving competitive exams.
We keep wasting paper and pen.
I've had enough of this!
Sir, I...
Raghu, tell me the truth.
Or else, I'll torture the doctor.
Sir, he doesn't know
anything about Hao Li.
I didn't tell him anything.
Tell us what you didn't tell him.
This is a huge market,
30 billion's worth.
And completely unorganized.
Right, disorganized.
Sir, it is a huge market
but it is still virgin.
Our soup will break its virginity.
That's fine, Raghu,
but what about awareness?
We will earn respect
only after there is awareness.
Don't worry about that.
I have already thought about it.
Everything is in place.
Sit.
What do you think, will my medicine work?
You have a good plan.
But your medicine will only
work for 70-80 percent people.
I cannot give the guarantee
that it will work 100 percent.
No one other than you can
understand it or prescribe it.
I know this is not right.
Raghu, it doesn't make any difference.
The only condition is
that it should work.
Do you know the biggest problem of India?
We think about sex when at work
and we think about work during sex.
That's the reason you don't
perform well at work and at night.
You are so funny, sir.
So, do we have a deal?
Prabha, does he want a partnership,
or your hand in marriage?
Please tell me.
I promise.
-Promise?
-Promise.
Awareness and business had joined hands.
Both thought this was a profitable deal.
But Raghu, suddenly shifting from
Nepalese carpets to Chinese fans?
Where did you get this idea from?
I thought about it.
Why didn't you tell me?
Rukmani...
you have tolerated
a lot in these ten years.
But our time is about to change now.
Now China, Japan, and the whole
world will be a fan of Raghu's fan.
The whole world.
One brave move and I
was all set to go for war.
I have to gather my soldiers
and prepare them for war.
Natu.
Our most trusted employee.
Though he was super slow at work,
he was super-fast at calculations.
Are you crazy?
What if Vithal finds out?
No one will find anything out.
Tell me, are you in?
Ten times stronger than Viagra?
I swear.
So tell me, are you in?
Jagdesh.
Rupa.
Dr. Vardhi's receptionist.
Smart, educated, Rupali a.k.a. Rupa.
She has been working with Dr. Vardhi
to support her family
after her divorce.
She was also a part-time model.
And she used to teach at a
coaching class during the weekends.
What salary do you seek?
I want partnership.
-How much?
6!
-Let's go, son.
-Let's meet in the middle at 12.
12?
Now I know why big companies
hire women as CEOs.
Ravi.
Natu's son.
He had nothing so far except
making photocopies and Facebook memes.
Sometimes those who do nothing
end up doing something big.
That's what Natu believed in.
This place belongs to Dr. Vardhi?
It was an old hospital.
No one uses it anymore.
This place seems haunted.
What are you doing, Natu?
Jagdesh.
I don't have a big introduction for him.
I got him free with Dr. Vardhi
in the buy-one-get-one offer.
From Apple to Amazon and
from HP to Harley Davidson.
All start-ups started in dingy places.
Dr. Vardhi's first floor
was about to become our office.
Hey!
Sit down.
So...
According to Dr. Vardhi our product
will work in 80 percent of the cases.
The 20 percent for
whom it doesn't work...
will indulge in negative publicity.
A man always has a huge ego.
As huge as a football.
Even if it doesn't work
they will never say it out aloud.
They will never admit it.
Yes, son, no man would accept
that he didn't perform well in bed.
So, we will begin with manufacturing.
The best place for manufacturing
was aunt Dhani's house.
Neha, today we will
make creamy cottage cheese.
Usually everyone likes it.
Kids, elders.
Hello.
Yes. It's my husband's favorite.
Really?
What does your husband do, Rashmi?
Well, my husband is
a mechanical engineer.
He has to do most of his job standing.
So, he is quite tired
by the time he reaches home.
-Obviously.
-So this kind of a dish cheers him up.
Oh.
Keep stirring all the
spices till the oil separates.
This smells amazing.
Why don't you taste it?
-This is delicious, Rashmi.
-Amazing.
Our next step is packaging.
With a good packaging you can
sell anything at the price of gold.
Ravi, you will handle the packaging.
Bruce Lee? Salman Khan?
Or Tiger Shroff?
He will be the best.
We are not making a movie here.
Just write "Magic Soup"
and write something nice in Chinese.
What should I write in Chinese?
For zealous men.
That's great.
Raghu!
Raghu!
Yes?
What is this?
What is this?
Oh yes, I had an upset stomach yesterday,
so Vithal gave me this mix.
Are you feeling better now?
Yes, I'm farting a lot
but everything else is...
Raghu!
Just 5?
This is just a sample product.
We'll need money to produce it in large
quantity and distribute it in the market.
We need...
around 350,000 for manufacturing,
marketing and distribution.
Bharat, it's the best
product in the market.
I have brought it all the way from China.
I need 700,000 from you.
I will return it with interest.
Didn't you come to me with an idea
of making a floor cleaner with cow urine?
That was a long time ago.
I didn't work on it
after you asked me not to.
How about 350,000 then?
So, Raghu...
Raman told me everything about you.
What's your scheme?
Can we talk in your office?
Let's not talk in
front of these buffaloes.
These buffaloes won't leak
your business plan to the CNN.
You are right.
How much money do you want?
700,000 at 4% for 2 months.
At 4%?
Take this.
I won't give it at less than 12%
even to my father.
Dad? Daddy...
Get lost.
Waste of time!
Can I have a moment of your time?
Yes.
I have a medicine.
Okay.
You know there are
some men who face weakness?
They want to perform well, but
when they need to perform, they can't?
Also, for those who can...
This is the best medicine.
It will take Gujarat... Not just Gujarat,
the whole of India by storm.
There is no product
like this in the market.
Trust me.
Come here.
You will get the funding
by day after tomorrow, okay?
Mix it in water and have it.
Population of Ahmadabad: 8 million.
Population of Gujarat: 65 million.
There must be hundreds of
thousands unsatisfied couples
among these 65 million.
If we manage to get our product
to even 5% of these people
then our sales will be in millions.
Rupa, you'll get the patients' list
from all local clinics
hospitals, IVFs and gynecologists.
Do you know what it means?
-Yes.
-Explain.
-How do I?
-Okay, I can understand.
Don't miss any parking lots.
And make sure our soup reaches
the mothers waiting outside the school.
Did you understand?
I am your father.
You came into this world because of me.
Did you understand?
Don't act smart.
Go.
From 150 clinics we
got data of 800 patients.
You should send emails to all of them.
And a message on their phone as well.
Okay?
We used to do it a lot
before we got married.
What?
Sex, obviously.
And now?
And now that we are married,
he doesn't feel like doing it.
It happens.
It happens with everyone.
Okay, but is there a solution?
Give him this soup and start singing.
My little dude is too little.
He wants to be hulk, doctor.
Size doesn't matter.
Performance does.
If you want to be hulk,
then stay away from stress.
Do I eat it or rub it?
First, you pop this then you pop it.
It will stop working, son.
Grandpa, Raghu is here.
Raghu! Come here!
Welcome, Carpet King.
Have a seat.
What do you keep doing till this hour?
Uncle, he works really hard these days.
He keeps video conferencing with
international clients all night long.
-Oh.
-Really?
What business has he started now?
Chinese fans.
Chinese fans?
Chinese fan.
Do you import them or export them?
Export.
I see.
Where do you get it from?
I get them from the same guy
I get the carpets from, in Nepal.
Then I export them.
Where?
Obviously to China.
Where in China?
Guangzhou,
Macau, Foshan, Shenzen, Pattaya.
Pattaya?
Great.
Wonderful.
Who is your distributor in Guangzhou?
Hao Li.
-Hao Li?
-Yes.
Which company?
How many tonnes do you send?
3-4 tonnes?
3-4 tonnes of fans?
China is a big country.
Looks like your fans
will cause the next tsunami.
My product is so powerful that
it is guaranteed to cause a tsunami.
Tiger Exporter is a seafood company.
What?
This is some other company.
That company is new,
so it still doesn't have a website.
Okay.
What's the turnover?
The margin is...
You guys are always
talking about business.
I'll go and get some
ice cream for everyone.
Yes, let's eat ice cream.
-Sir...
-Our Carpet King!
You can try your luck at this as well.
And be a Fan King.
These small businesses sometimes
make people mill-owners.
-Mill-owner?
-Millionaires.
Bhide's nephew
became a millionaire
by selling zips for pants.
He makes strong zips.
Pants fall out but the zip doesn't.
Yes, I'll meet you tomorrow.
No problem.
We'll go for coffee.
I'll call you back.
Raghu, no progress.
I think all men have become superman.
No one needs it anymore.
Is this a joke?
Is this a joke?
No, Raghu.
Sorry...
You thought you are special?
One in a million?
Even if you are,
there are 12,000 more like you in India.
It's quite common.
You guys are common.
Don't worry.
It takes time for the
new business to setup.
You told your wife about the business?
Not yet.
-Tell her.
-I will.
I'll tell her in some time.
She'll get shocked otherwise.
-You are scared of her?
-No, I am not.
I'll tell her when the time is right.
Tanmay?
Raghu.
China?
Thepla.
From Ahmadabad?
How did you like the idea?
Do you think this product will sell?
Why are you asking me?
Well, you have experience.
Who said you need
experience to do business?
Then?
You need balls of steel.
Balls of steel?
Look.
75% of our body is water.
71% of earth is water.
This water has been freely
available since 4.5 billion years.
Then one day comes a smart guy
who bottles this free
water and sells it for 20 rupees.
And some chumps purchase it.
If you know how to sell,
then you can sell anything.
-How's this idea?
-It's good.
Your idea is a bomb, it will explode.
You're selling the wrong thing.
What?
Soup is your product
and you are selling the soup.
Doesn't the customer need the product?
The customer doesn't know shit.
The customer is an...
The customer is an idiot.
You never sell the actual product.
Then?
The soup is your story
and Vardhi is your hero.
Sell the hero, not the story.
He is the hero.
The customer's mind is like a
field filled with sugarcane.
Each sugarcane is a product.
His mind is filled with products.
But a brand...
What is a brand?
What is it?
Brand is like a wild bull.
A wild bull.
A wild bull.
This wild bull enters the field,
crushes all sugarcane
and makes a place for itself.
Make Vardhi your brand.
A 70-year-old rock star sexologist!
Try to sell him.
If he sells, then I
will get you the funding.
People prefer privacy.
No one gathers the courage
to speak up in front of everyone.
Don't expect more than
a handful of people to show up.
Why are you being so negative?
I'll go outside and check if he is here.
I'm not being negative.
Calm down, Dr. Vardhi.
Yes, sir.
-Doctor?
-Yes.
Great.
Here for the seminar?
-Yes.
-Thank God you are here.
-This way please, sir.
-Come on.
This year our primary school has arranged
this seminar especially for the parents.
You can ask any mental health
or stress related question pertaining
to your child directly to Dr. Mrunang.
-It can be done using Google Pixel.
-Raghu!
Sir is going to the wrong place.
Sexologist's seminar
is taking place elsewhere.
Sir is such a...
A common man can
be famous in only ways.
Either by saying the wrong thing
at the right place.
Or by saying the right thing
at the wrong place.
Doctor is here with us now.
Hello, everyone.
I am happy and surprised as well.
I thought only a handful would show up.
But we have a packed auditorium instead.
So, without wasting any time,
let's take the first question.
Go ahead.
Yes, gentleman.
Come on.
Sir, my kid is never in the mood.
Never excited about anything.
He is not even interested in playing.
So does he have depression?
What did you say?
My kid.
Okay.
Let's address this as a kid.
Okay?
You say that your "child"
is never in the "mood".
You will have to get him into the mood.
I believe that you should
encourage your "child" to play.
How will he get excited
if he doesn't play?
Don't footballers and cricketers
do warm up before a game?
Only then do they
perform well in the game.
Understood?
Sir, my kid gets tired midway.
Is there a solution for that?
Stress levels are quite high in India.
There is work stress,
boss stress, too many to mention.
You are bound to get tired
midway if you bring that stress home.
So, it is important to stay stress-free.
You can reach orgasm only
if you remain stress-free.
He must have said organism, sir.
Sir, what can we do to
reduce the stress of exams?
First of all, intercourse is not an exam.
How can it be an exam?
He didn't say course.
He said intercourse.
Do you score your husband?
7 on 10? 8 on 10?
Let me tell you a secret,
he'll ace as soon
as you stop calling it an exam.
Sir, he is Dr. Vardhi.
His sex column features in the newspaper.
There is no misunderstanding.
Look how many people
have raised their hands.
Go and sit over there.
Go.
He seems to be unwell.
Yes, ma'am?
Sir, the bulb gets lit
but there's no light.
It's a metaphoric question.
Fine.
So I too will reply in a metaphor.
Men are like...
matchsticks.
They burn out.
And women are like steam irons.
They take time to warm up.
So, men need to be a little patient.
If they are patient then
the bulb will glow brightly.
Doctor, don't you think we
shouldn't discuss this at such places?
Who was that?
Where else should we discuss it then?
This is the right forum.
We will teach a frog's anatomy
and reproductive system
in school.
But we won't teach about
human reproductive system.
Why?
It is important.
It is important to know.
They switched off the mic.
But that won't stop me.
We should discuss this.
A father and a son should discuss this.
A mother and a daughter
should discuss this.
A husband and a wife should discuss this.
Friends should discuss this.
Talk openly and a lot of
your problems will get solved.
Sir!
A lot of your problems will get solved.
Jagdesh!
Raghu, we have so many patients.
Too many to handle.
He's having a tough time.
-My turn.
-Wait, wait, wait.
No more killing time by having snacks!
Jagdesh!
What do you want for
our anniversary this time?
Give me whatever you like.
Okay.
We were all hush-hush
when we started this business.
Finally, success came to us with a bang.
RV International.
This is our soup's
new premium packaging.
Thank you.
It is good.
Meet Myra and Kyra.
-Hi.
-Tanmay has sent them.
They are studying in America.
What was the name of the university?
-Berkeley.
-Right.
Now we needed a new
foolproof delivery system
which could have our soup
delivered at home as soon as possible.
There are still many people
who feel shy to order our soup.
We have this number for them.
Type magic and send it to this number
and we will deliver
the soup wherever you want.
Kyra and Myra, place this number
on all the social media accounts.
Everywhere.
Sir, I'll get piles if I keep
making deliveries on a scooter.
Kahnudo, how many boys work for you?
There is a 500-rupee margin
on every liquor bottle.
You will get a 500-rupee margin
on our soup.
Plus, the blessings from all the
unsatisfied wives who gain satisfaction.
What do you say, Ravi?
And no need to worry
about the police either.
So now, say no to liquor
and say yes to soup.
Our delivery system was foolproof.
Both bootleggers and milkmen
were selling the same thing.
Our magic soup.
On the other hand,
Dr. Vardhi was spreading awareness from
kitty parties to women's organizations.
This country needed many
more doctors like Dr. Vardhi.
I wanted to make Dr. Vardhi
a household name through the soup.
A dream which Dr. Vardhi
and I saw together.
We are here.
Park it right there.
Sir.
I get you alcohol every day and you
just realized you have to thank me?
Not for the alcohol.
Tanmay had called.
Really?
We will get the funding.
You rock, sir!
Look at these faces carefully.
Look at their million-dollar smiles.
Remember, it is not easy to do business.
It is like scuba diving in a sea of fire.
Duffers.
I wonder where they come from.
Their minds are full of shit.
-Tell me.
-What's with the sudden summons?
Is everything okay?
The irony is that I teach
business to the world
and my partner turned
out to be a cheater.
Mr. Mathur, please leave.
We'll do this later.
Which partner of yours
turned out to be a cheater?
I am talking about you!
No!
The Chinese who were going
to invest in our company...
I was relaxed.
I was calm.
Then, I said to myself,
"Where is the funding going?"
If it is not coming to us
then it has gone somewhere else.
So, I investigated.
There is a company in Ahmadabad,
RV International.
They sell this.
I have heard about it.
And what did you do about it?
This is an illegal product.
If I call the FDA,
they will ban it immediately.
Devraj, you have great connections.
That's great.
This is being sold at drug stores,
over the counter, right?
You will get it banned.
How will you ban a product that
is being sold in the underground market?
Damn it!
I was working hard for this deal
for two years.
I sent you to China for it.
But someone took it
right from under our noses.
What should I do now?
Commit suicide.
What?
Find out about them.
Commit suicide.
I'll buy it.
How will you buy it?
They already have a funding.
That's not your headache,
you are about to commit suicide.
There's no use talking to you.
Call me after you calm down.
No one shows his back to Chopra!
Close the door!
Stop!
How dare he!
He couldn't tie the drawstrings right.
I taught him how to wear a suit.
Call for a cappuccino.
Why are you standing there?
Come here.
Why are you stinking?
Stay back.
Why don't you use a perfume?
-It's automatic.
-Amazing.
I hope your wife doesn't
get a heart attack.
This is the first time
I'm gifting her something.
-Is it locked from that side?
-I'll go and check.
Click a picture.
Here.
This is what is trending these days.
Open it, sir.
Here.
Money?
Hey!
Come here.
Oh, no.
Naughty vivid dreams
Naughty are my desires
Been dormant for so long
Will come to life if you play along
Sway, sway
Sway, sway
Sway throughout the night
Sway, sway
Sway, sway throughout the night
Be mine
Be my queen
You saw me on my way to fill water
On the moonlit full moon night
You kept staring at me
From two feet away
You finally gathered courage
To approach me this way
I am a wearing a backless blouse
And a sari
My fans include Shah Rukh and Sallu
Today is your chance to do some romance
Come to me, but approach with caution
You are the reward
To my past birth's merits
The whole of Ahmadabad is jealous
I am like a boring shirt
You are like satin
If I spend the night with you,
It will cause a storm
If you will approach me like this
It will cause a flood
Which cannot be controlled
Sway, sway
Sway, sway throughout the night
Be mine
Be my queen
Sway...
Sway throughout the night
What?
Hello.
Devraj.
Dr. Vardhi.
Rukmani.
Shall we begin?
Have you heard about
Fifty Shades of Grey?
Paint's shade card?
Actually, there's a
new product in the market.
All my friends have said
that it's quite effective.
I want you to try it.
But you said that
you reach the top floor.
We don't need it. Let's do it.
This takes one even higher.
-Hello?
-Where are you?
At home.
How can you not be a part
of your success party?
Everyone is waiting for you.
Are you coming here,
or should I come there?
I am coming.
Is everything alright?
That was Devraj.
I'll need to go.
Welcome, Mr. Dream Merchant.
You are late.
The party is over.
By the way, great packaging.
Pot it and it shoots
you up like a rocket.
Catch.
Come with me.
Come with me.
-I'll be right back.
-Continue having fun, yeah?
You could have resorted to stealing.
You could have resorted
to robbing a bank.
You could have resorted to beg,
you moron.
From selling carpets to selling
stuff that make nights more fun.
You should have thought about
our family's reputation.
We are the trustees of Hatkesh temple.
Does she know?
Be at Chopra's office
tomorrow morning at nine.
Chopra?
Abhay Chopra.
Abhay Chopra!
9 o'clock sharp.
I'll send you the address.
9 o'clock sharp.
Bye.
I have watched all your videos.
I am a huge fan.
-Can I give you a hug, sir?
-Of course.
I've learnt a lot from you, sir.
Have a seat.
Learning business by watching videos is
like learning swimming by reading a book.
Okay.
There is always the fear of drowning.
No, sir. I already had some.
I get hundreds of business
proposals every day.
Young bright kids, businessmen,
they all want to collaborate with me.
They all want to do business with me.
Ask me who do I wish to work with.
-Who?
-With Rocket!
Because there is a
fire behind every rocket.
Raghuveer Mehta,
there's a fire behind you.
Now?
Don't feel shy.
It is warm, sir.
These Chinese are very smart people.
Very smart.
But very tricky people.
You cannot handle them alone.
Anyway, tell me something.
What is business?
Business is a game.
A game of football.
You are center midfield,
you move forward with the ball.
You go to the opposition.
You give it to the striker.
And striker hits the goal!
Because it's always the
striker who hits the goal.
Messi does it.
I am your Messi.
You came so far just
by watching my videos.
Imagine how far you
will go if you work with me.
We'll sell this soup
in every corner of the world.
Think big.
Big.
Excuse me, sir.
Hold on...
What is it?
Okay, I'm coming.
Good poster.
I knew you would take the right decision.
No, sir.
You didn't understand my game.
It's a different game.
In my game, you just need to
stay off the field and do the commentary.
You cannot play.
I'll handle that.
It's you who has taught me this, sir
Dreams are not like junk food.
Don't undervalue them.
Sir, I won't undervalue my dream.
Moreover, I don't play football.
If you ever wish to
play cricket do let me know.
I love to hit sixes.
Raghu!
Devraj's brother!
I'll ruin you.
I am Abhay Chopra!
What the hell is this?
Don't ever give it to me again!
I just want some normal tea!
What happened?
We found this in your son's school bag.
For the past two days, he is making
his classmates have it during recess.
-Chintu!
-It's just porridge, Dad.
I got it from Aunt Dhani's place.
He thought it was porridge, madam.
He doesn't know.
You are right.
He got confused.
You are right.
He'll apologize.
Chintu, apologize.
Apologize!
I'll apologize on his behalf.
I apologize.
I apologize to everyone.
Rukmani!
He's just a kid, he made a mistake.
This is his first mistake.
Rukmani...
What have you done?
Let me go!
Yes, Uncle?
Hello? Listen.
Do you know anything about this
new business that Raghu has started?
That idiot should have thought
twice before starting such a business.
He is a part of the Mehta family.
This is our personal matter.
We will handle it.
Right.
Look, you might not have a problem,
but I have a big problem with it.
Do let Raghu know.
He should never use Mehta
family's name ever again.
Okay?
Bye.
What is this?
Rukmani, I was going to tell you.
What were you going to tell me?
Listen to me.
You don't have a problem
with your friends purchasing it.
You don't have a problem
with you using it.
You don't have a problem
with the world using it.
But you have a problem
with me selling it.
That is not fair, Rukmani.
You know there are so many men out there
who don't talk about their weakness.
What is wrong in it
if my medicine helps them?
How many business ideas of yours failed?
We had nearly zero income.
Did I ever complain?
I just wanted people to respect you.
I wanted our relatives to respect you.
Rukmani.
I can no longer respect you anymore!
Don't say that, Rukmani.
Why did you do this?
I'm sorry, I made a mistake.
Why did you lie to me?
Why did you lie!
I'm sorry, I made a mistake.
I've had enough of your lies.
I didn't lie.
Rukmani!
Rukmani, please hear me out.
Everyone trusted me.
I broke everyone's trust.
No, no, no. Don't say that.
You cannot break anyone's trust.
Do you understand?
This business, funding, advertisement.
I don't want it.
We should stop all this.
-This is wrong.
-No. Calm down.
This is wrong.
We will work this out.
I don't want to!
This is wrong.
-We will work this out.
-I don't want to!
This is wrong.
We should stop all this.
This is wrong.
Now all this is wrong?
Is this wrong?
Look at me.
I made you leave when you
approached me for the first time.
But you came back.
I made you leave again.
You came back.
I made you leave again.
You came back.
That's when I thought
that this boy is special.
He will do something great.
But I was wrong.
I was wrong.
I think you should stick
to selling your Nepalese carpets.
It is very easy for you to say this.
You live with a goat.
I have a wife.
From the investigation,
they have learnt that
Chinese General Zeng died
after consuming your soup.
My soup?
Turn this crisis into
an opportunity and score.
Tanmay?
Please tell us sir.
No one is going to believe this story.
You are ready to confess.
Now what happens depends on...
Friends, we have been ordered
to stop this investigation.
Government of India has 32 agencies.
They'll setup an inquiry commission
tomorrow to do preliminary inquiry.
It will consist of everyone
from the IT department
to the animal welfare organization.
This is the time to reconsider.
Tell us the truth,
what were you adding in that soup?
Otherwise,
you are about to get into big trouble.
Sharma.
This is a big mess.
We have representatives from
various services present here today.
They don't have any direct
connection in General Zeng's death.
The magic soup
does have something to
do with General Zeng's death.
To make and sell a self-claimed
miraculous magical soup
is illegal.
Well...
But we weren't just selling the product,
we are trying to sell Doctor.
I mean, market him.
Mr. Raghuveer, were you mixing
a tiger's body parts in your soup?
Basically, he is saying, where's
the proof of a tiger's presence in it?
We found animal protein in your products.
There is animal protein
found in milk as well.
Then what were you
adding in your product?
So you are interested
in my soup's recipe?
Please, make it quick.
Fine, I'll tell you.
20 grams cardamom powder.
50 grams sugar.
Cashew, pistachio and walnut,
50 grams each.
Finely crushed.
And 200 grams milk powder.
And?
And what?
You know what it turns into
after you add hot water to it?
Milk based dessert.
This is what we mix in hot
water and give to our patients.
What type of food is it?
What nonsense!
No... China, sir.
It's a sweet. Dessert.
So, are you telling us that
all these people got cured with that?
Yes.
What's it called? Placebo.
The placebo effect.
70% of the sex-related
problems are psychological.
They are only in the mind.
The patient thinks he is having a medicine
and that gives him confidence.
Thus, he enjoys sex thoroughly.
Simple.
I didn't curse anyone.
Okay!
You don't have a problem
with my language.
You have a problem with this word.
It's a simple word.
It's normal.
But the method you chose to
make Mr. Vardhi famous, is wrong.
Dr. Vardhi gave vulgar
lectures at public forums.
That is illegal.
You were thrown out of
Uganda for the same reason.
Excuse me, sir, you aren't well.
Tonsils.
I made you say
such a vulgar thing
in front of a
respectable committee.
What's vulgar in tonsils?
So it is not vulgar
to talk about tonsils?
It is not vulgar to
talk about a fractured hand?
It is not vulgar to talk
about appendix and diabetes?
Then why is it vulgar to
talk about reproductive organs?
Are they not your body parts?
Yes?
Do you get them installed separately,
privately?
Vulgar.
We live in a country
where someone has said
that a peahen gets
pregnant by consuming
our national bird, a peacock's tears.
This is how backward our thinking is.
Such people have a problem
with not just human sex life
but a peacock's sex live as well.
Why don't you explain it to them?
Question them so that
we can put our point across.
Question them.
Calm down.
I have a question.
How did 1.3 billion
of us come into existence?
Does anyone know?
Did we fall from the sky?
Sir, the lab report.
Did a crane leave you in your
courtyard when you were just a baby?
Did you grow on a tree?
Where you plucked
off a tree like an apple?
We are here because of this.
We all do it.
Those who don't, come and take my help.
What nonsense!
We all do it.
Our parents do it.
Our forefathers did it.
And those who came
before them also did it.
That's why there are 1.3 billion of us.
But we are taught not to talk about it.
We feel suffocated, we feel frustrated.
We feel embarrassed.
What does that result in?
Deformation.
That results in molestation...
child abuse and what not.
Husbands and wives fights.
They don't come out and say it.
That results in domestic violence,
affairs and can end up in divorce.
I have witnessed it. Divorce.
Has anyone divorced because of tonsils?
Yes?
What rubbish!
I had learnt this in Uganda.
Then the new government was formed.
They said, "Hey, what are you doing!
Go away!"
I ran away from there.
I ran away like a coward.
I opened a small clinic in Ahmadabad
and started advising people.
Then one day, a patient came to me...
who later became my friend.
He said, "Sir, we will make money.
I will be a businessman.
We will open awareness centers for you.
We will spread awareness."
He gave me courage.
Let me tell you something very clearly.
I am not in Uganda anymore.
No matter what you say,
I won't keep quiet.
Shoot me or hang me
or send me to the moon.
I'll send WhatsApp messages
from the moon and spread awareness.
We tested 60 random
samples of your product.
Sir, I hope you are
no longer upset with me.
Scoundrel, you were fooling
us for the last 24 hours.
Come on, sir, how can I do that?
I kept telling you that there
is nothing objectionable in the product.
But you paid no heed to me.
At least tell us what that
Chinese hunter had sent you.
He has sent the Chinese tiger soup, sir.
Hao Li was duping everyone. He had
Chinese herbs in the soup that he sold.
Aren't you scared?
Do you know the most important
thing needed to start a business?
What?
Balls of steel.
Would you like some, sir?
In a steel bowl?
Let's go.
I made you go global in 24 hours.
Now I will show you your brand value.
A true businessman sells
a solution and not a problem.
And that's why
the solution called Vardhi was soon
about to become a household name.
Rukmani, your husband has
left a mark on an industry
that isn't much valued in our society.
Mr. Raghuveer Mehta.
Who is the customer?
Sir, the customer is the king.
Sir, a customer is like God.
Sir, a customer means business.