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Made in Italy (2018)
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Hear him ? - So what? - "So what?" Why do you keep whistling ? - Sorry ? - Why do you keep fucking whistling ? - That's my goddamn business. - No, it's mine too. - He keeps whistling ! - Max, drop it, get back to work. He can't even whistle properly. - Hey, Riko. - Hey. Your friend's a jerk. You're not so bad yourself. He's worse. - See you. - Bye. As for corruption in the public service sector, we're bottom of the league. Italy is Europe's most corrupt country, beaten only by Bulgaria. The shower was freezing. What's up with the boiler ? M Everything you deserve Angela's invited us to dinner tomorrow. - Patrizio's bringing his new boyfriend. - Someone texted you. "M" ? As in "matador" ? Or "motherfucking lover" ? - Save it with a fake female name. - Don't look at my phone. - It was staring right at me. - Don't ever do that again ! I'm going to Milan on Monday, I'm taking an afternoon for myself. A little louder, they can't hear you in Palermo ! These speakers are mine ! Do you want to blow them ? - You're still pilfering my records ? - Sometimes. I was just finishing up... The footage I shot with the captions: "How did I get here ?", "What am I doing here?"... I'll make a short movie. Not about you, rockstar. I'll shoot more material then edit it. What's up ? I've found a studio flat in the centre. What for ? I'm happy here, I can't afford to pay rent. - Neither can you ! - We'll manage. You need to move on. You need to grow up. - Cut the apron strings. - You've rowed with mum ? Leave her out of it. I don't want you to settle for this. It's too easy to settle. It's too easy to settle ? What's wrong ? It's Friday. Everyone's an expert now, you see ? "Today it went up to 215". 215 what? "The spread !" The spread ? There's no smoking in my car. What? Since when ? Since I quit. What the fuck do I know anyway ? Instead I had to worry about him, for the spread. Do you get me ? Is everything Okay 7 Yes, can I call you back ? It's best I call you back. I will. - This calendar's five years old. - Yes. Anyway, spreads, sacrifices, various bullshit and then Copelli. - Copelli ? - Punga. Oh, Punga. They fired him today. That's the third in under a month. I know... you don't care about the spread. - Where are we going ? - To Baracca. Didn't it shut down ? - Do they still play rock music ? - Yeah ! Rock music... you wish ! Won't they let you in ? 'Cause of your crap shoes ? On the train, dimwit! Here he is ! This is Riko. This is Carla, that's Miriam. Miriam's a beautician. Should you need her... Whereas Carla is my osteopath and unofficially... she was my model. - What do you mean by "unofficially" ? - Well... Whatever he's told you, I've never done anything with him. I sat for free, so drinks are on you tonight. - Have you been friends long ? - Unfortunately, yes. So what's his real name ? Why's he called Carnival ? Is that his surname ? He signs his paintings with that name too. Does he look miserable ? - No. - Doesn't he look like a carnival puppet? - Yes. - Plus he's done jack shit all his life. Not bad, huh ? If you're having too much fun, we'll tone things down. Miriam... a beautician... Right... Carla ! - Am I interrupting ? - No, we were waiting for you. I heard you liked young guys, but this is going too far. Mama, you've had your say, you can go now. Apart from the age thing, isn't pulling someone's wife sleazy ? - You know she's my wife. - Ex-wife. Now go away. Miriam, do you have the hots for oldies too ? Fuck you ! Did you study to be such an idiot? Carla, come with me. - Mattia, go away. - Come back another day ! Carla... Let's not make a scene. You know you have to come anyway. Listen, Mattia. Maybe, just maybe she doesn't want to talk to you. Why don't you just mind your own goddamn business ? Fuck off. - "Fuck off" ? - Yes. No! Put it away. Put it away, idiot. Come on, let's go. You didn't quit for long. Sorry, I messed up. I forgot to bring nappies ! Choco-Riko ! The super-hero ice-cream, white on the top, brown in your pants ! Shit, man... What nutters ! Hi, Enea. How's it going ? Not good, stay away. Stay away. Do you remember this ? The magnetic jacket. This'll attract them all, remember ? Let's do what we did last time. There, now they're all in here. You're clean. I'll get rid of them okay ? Bye, Enea. You didn't do military service, Alle, I'll tell you the quartermaster story. - No, please ! - The army quartermaster was the guy who worked in the office and decided who would be on guard duty. You had to take turns. Of course, there were those who hassled him: "Don't put me on duty, why does it have to be me..." They'd complain, insist, and at times make threats, so to shut them up, the quartermaster would put someone on duty who didn't deserve it and whose only crime was that of toeing the line. The quartermaster's law is the same law this country's based on: those who moan, break the law, and put the pressure on, dodge guard duty but instead send, in their place, those who do their duty in silence. That's his piece de resistance when he meets someone new. Because he was a quartermaster. And he Still is. Is this Lebanese food, Angela ? It's delicious. Do you like it? I'm glad. We like to eat ethnic food ! Last time she cooked Italian food I was in middle school. - Idiot ! - Meaning last year... He resat his exams several times. - Alle, what do you do ? - My partners and I run a gym. - Is business good ? - He's fishing for clients, how sad. Patrizio told me you're an accountant, business is great, thanks. - And Angela, you're a teacher ? - Yes, at the Marconi School. - A high school. - Great, what about you ? - I work in car insurance. - I live it up among pigs. He works at the Veroni salami factory. I watch him living it up with the pigs. - I told him they were jerks. - He works at the salami factory too. - Hairdresser, I run a salon with a friend. - And so... Just so I know, if I call you a faggot, do you mind ? - Yes. - Good man ! I like your attitude ! Not like him, he calls himself a faggot by himself. - Just think, I have to live with him. - I'll switch him off, if you like. One more thing. Sorry... I always get to ask this. Will you be with him for a month at least ? Because we grow fond of people easily. And we've already grown fond of around 50, before you... - That's not true ! - I can dismantle him, if you like. - One last thing... - I'll say it, we all know what it is. Don't worry about them, they look coked up to the eyeballs. Due to their exuberance. But they're not, they wake up like this. Enjoy your evening with wifey. A real shag party I bet ! - What do you want? - Rebecchi too now ? Enough, for god's sake ! Stop ! You're telling me ? It's not up to me ! What's on the menu today... rat? Rat stew, roast rat... caramelised rat... Rebbo... I'm sorry. Gianluca's next. It's official: everyone's screwing everyone in here. Up for our Monday card game later ? Up for a card game later ? It's great fun eating with you. All morning I thought: "I'll sit with Riko at lunch, it'll make my day". Look at our dear Sara... How did I get here ? My life story in two minutes ? No. No. What am I doing here ? My share. There must have been a contest today where the biggest assholes won a chance to bust my ass. All on a Monday ? Couldn't they spread themselves out? Always the last to arrive, Riko ! Always... Pussy detector. No, he came straight here. No diversions before coming here, Mr Tirelli ? No. Okay, me and Carnival against the two shits. Two shits who will thrash you. Five euros per game. We'll play to 51. Last round is at eleven thirty. Seven, plus one, two, three coins. I win. - You're playing three against one ? - I can't leave the seven there ! - Whenever you're ready... - What's the rush ? Rush, my ass ! Your turn. I wanted to enjoy the moment... All the sevens ! All the sevens ! All the sevens for me ! You're still here ? Go home. Your shift starts in six hours. What's wrong ? Home... - Do you ever think about my home ? - That's all I think about. My grandpa built it... my father made it bigger... and I'm the one who can't afford it. The one who has to sell it. Only no one wants to buy it, our family home, do you see ? I can see that you're drunk. Sara's having an affair. So are you. You know Sara. - You know what this means to her. - Yes... that she's in the wrong but you're not. You keep saying you can't stand her. Do you even know what you want? What I want... I have this little voice that... keeps going round in my head. All the time. I want her to stop treating me like a fool, that's what I want. I've been there... for a lifetime... with a condom on my head, stuffing sausages and I think: "Is this what I am ?" "Is this me ?" And the little voice says: "Things'll get better". The house is falling to bits. That pig-headed son of mine... "Things'll get better". Italy's gone to the dogs. The world's a shithole... "Things'll get better". Listen, I can't fucking stand whingers and you've just won first, second and third prize as one. Get the fuck out of here. I don't mean now... that too, if you want. I mean in general, get the fuck out of here. Change city, job, family... But above all, please, change friends. Make a change instead of waiting for one. - Maybe I should change friends. - Great idea, starting from now. Goodnight ! Wait... May I? Go on. They're great. They're not bad. Who's the model...? Just a model. You're getting better and better. And you don't have the slightest clue. Off to bed. Shall I drive you home ? If you get pulled over, they'll take your license and smoke it. See you. And anyway, Italy's not gone to the dogs. And the world isn't a shithole. It's wonderful, you idiot ! Don't come round. Claudio's staying the night... Hi. Where's the pussy ? How are you ? Do you get any pussy ? Have you had lunch ? I'm Riccardo, dad ! You're sweating, are you hot? Will you call Rosanna for me ? She's gone, dad. Mum's gone. When's she coming ? I'll call her later. What day is today ? Wednesday. - You go after pussy on Wednesdays ? - No, I visit you. How's Pietro ? Pietro's fine. He's found a girlfriend, apparently. What about Antonio ? Antonio ? Who's Antonio ? Antonio... Dad. Giovanni? Dad ! You do it on purpose, right? You're pretending. So everyone leaves you alone. Right, dad '2 Yes. The chicken's good. It's tastes like fish ! Maybe if they cook fish, it'll taste like chicken. - We're going to Rome on Tuesday. - Are you off your head ? - Who's "we" ? - Me, you and Carnival. - What's Carnival got to do with it ? - He needs to come too. - Does he know ? - I'll tell him. - What about me ? Did you ask me ? - There's no need. There's no need. Carnival ! Mauro ! Are you okay ? Enough now, okay ? Enough, I mean it. The night before... we're here now and it's the night before. What now ? If this is a babe hunt, count me out. Firstly, because I'm faithful. Secondly, because I always get the dogs. Have you ever heard of an Italian being a tourist in Rome in the past 20 years ? No, it's our turn then. In a car ? No. On foot. Almost. - Almost. - Almost. Hi, Daniele. Thanks a million. Voil ! Cool, huh ? It doesn't even have brakes. Shit! - Where's he going ? - Out of the way ! Shitheads. You're total shitheads. What's so fucking funny ? Thanks, Giulio, really. - No problem. Behave. - Don't worry. Guys, we've got half an hour, come on. Thanks. - What did you tell him ? - That you had two months to live. You bastard ! You wanted to come here, right ? I could do with a new back ! Cool, huh ? A breath-taking view. No? Is he worse than usual ? So, what shall we do ? Good question. Good morning, partners in crime ! I'm fine with "partner", not sure about the "crime" though. Are we ready ? Shall we go ? Riko, are you sure ? Yes, yes... Going or not makes no difference. I'm not talking to you, but to my co-worker. What are we going to do down there, Riko ? Something needs to be done. Something needs to be done. Hands off! Hands off! Hands off! Hands off! Hands off Article 18 ! Hands off! Hands off! Hands off Article 18 ! Hands off! Hands off! Hands off Article 18 ! Hands off! This is a planned demonstration, we have the right to protest. Make way ! We need to join the main protest. Police, go away ! Police, go away ! - Let us through ! - Police, go away ! Police, go away ! Stop, be quiet ! Stop ! Let us through ! Make way ! We need to join the main protest. We're allowed to protest ! What the fuck are you doing ? - They'll attack us ! - They sure will now! Stand over there and don't move ! You have no right to stop us ! A 20-minute queue for coffee. I can't believe I'm your nurse now. Well... cheers, then. Max Lionheart says hi. See how shit scared he was ? Get back to bed. I don't need to hold your hand, you're in better shape than me. I've had my coffee, so I'll scoot off. - There, perfect timing. - Hi. Hi. I've brought you some clothes. He's still in one piece, he's all yours. I'll be off. Thanks. A whack on the head did him good. Bye. Shall I put it there ? Yes. Well... I spoke to the doctor... You were lucky, it's nothing serious. They just want to keep you here to be safe. Oh, yes... Pietro. He knows you're fine, but wants to see you. Okay ? Yes. Here, wait... - Hi. - Hi. - Here he is. - Well? It was your first protest and you end up in hospital? It wasn't the first, you just hadn't been born yet. You wanna be a rockstar, huh ? The video of you getting truncheoned has had a billion views. By the way, some newspapers want to interview you. What shall I tell them ? Have a think then let me know. Well, you guys look happy. Spend a few days in Rome and have a riot. Oh God, "have a riot"... What a horrible thought ! - Bye. - Bye. If there's nothing you need, I'll go. After all... you're in good hands. The doctor... she's a good-looking lady. Well, see you tomorrow. You don't need to come. I'm staying in a hotel nearby, so I can be here for a few days. Maybe we'll go back together. I mean... we'll go home together. Well, bye. That was Angela. They wanted to come to Rome to visit you, but I told her we're leaving. Here you are ! Some journalists want to see you. They know you're getting discharged so... shall I send them up ? I suggest you see them today, or tomorrow it'll be worse. The images you've just seen have gone viral. During Tuesday's clashes a protester was hit by a policeman with a truncheon, causing a gash on his forehead. We're at the hospital where this protester is being treated. Luckily, he's out of danger and he's here with us: Riccardo Tirelli. So, Riccardo, you... and many others like you, came to Rome to exercise your right to stand up for your rights. It was a peaceful protest and then, suddenly, you were attacked. Actually, I didn't even make it as far as the protest. - And we weren't attacked. - So... Tell us what happened. Well... Me and two friends of mine got caught up in a group that was trying to join the protest. They were already hyped up, with megaphones, chanting... A sort of spontaneous fringe gathering. More or less... The street was being blocked by a group of policemen. - Insults started flying... - And that's when you were attacked. We were the ones who attacked. It's the game of roles. Every day you get mad and you suck it up. You get mad and you suck it up. You resist and resist, until one day... you either blow your top or take it out on someone. None of us wanted to take it out on the police. - But they were sent there. - And then ? And then you go back to making salami for 1,200 euros a month, after 30 years in the same job, to seeing your retirement age get further away, to having your house robbed of the few things you own every 5 years, to praying that you or your family don't get sick 'cause you'll wait 8 months for a scan. In a few months, my son's starting a Drama degree. He's the first in the family to go to uni. For some reason, he's fond of the area where he grew up. What's the likelihood of him staying there or joining the hundred thousand people who emigrate every year ? The images are very gory, they show that you lost a lot of blood and that you fainted after you were hit. But what I want to ask you is: do you remember what you were thinking at that moment when... you lost consciousness ? I was thinking that... I didn't want to think about anything. Maybe this last phrase sums up all the frustration felt by a category that feels invisible. Hold on... I'm not a category, okay ? I'm just speaking for myself. Hey, I'm up here. I only speak for myself. Okay. We're done, I think that'll do. Hi. Hi, mum. Come on, dinner's ready. You mean that you cooked ? Indian take-away. Martina brought it. Martina ? Come on, let's go ! Now, to end the report on Tuesday's protest, let's hear from someone who was wounded in the clashes. The images are very gory, they show that you lost a lot of blood. Do you remember what you were thinking at that moment when you lost consciousness ? I was thinking that... I didn't want to think about anything. Now for our report on nutrition. You'll win an Oscar! You're a film star! You showed them, Riko ! More like they showed me. You wanted to bust that truncheon with your head. Riko ! - Do you like Indian food ? - Yes. Do you want to try real Indian food ? Come to lunch on Sunday. - Bring your wife. - Great, thanks. - See you Sunday. You know where I live. - Bye. I know, they've split up three or four times but always make up. Patrizio in a steady relationship ? No way ! Let's see, maybe. Anyway, you look happy. I am happy. But? But you still haven't told him. Don't tell him, not ever. Don't tell him. And stop having all those doubts. I love our Monday lunches. Let's do it more often ! Hi. I was worried. There's no need. So, want to tell me about it? I'm sure you've heard it all. No, don't. No! I mean it, no. No? This is no good. "This is no good ?". What do you mean ? You're the first guy to ever refuse a blow job. Edda... let's call it off, okay. Who are you screwing ? Sogliani ? Tedeschi ? One of these days I'll go get my hair cut by your wife ! I'm dying to have a long chat with her! I'm outside, come out. No, I'm not coming in. You come out. Well? - Haven't we said "enough" enough ? - I'll decide when it's enough. You'll decide ? - They broke your wrists last year. - Are you my uncle ? - I'm watching, not playing. - Sure ! What about the casino in Venice ? Every other day. And the fruit machines in the county ? Every other day... Do you expect us to just sit back and watch you ? No, mind your own goddamn business. And you... You know how it works with junkies. You have to hit rock bottom. I'll be all right. See you on Friday. Hi, guys. - How are you ? - Good. Come on in. My father. I ate like there's no tomorrow ! Sorry, what ? I've never eaten so much in all my life. - You didn't eat a lot. - Yes, I did ! - How long have you lived here ? - I was born here. Why did your parents choose a place with the world's worst climate ? My father's brother lived here and he persuaded him. I like it here, I always have. You're a beautiful family. You remind me of the stories my father used to tell me. He lived with five siblings... - His parents, and grandparents... - Don't you like your family ? Don't you have kids ? We have a son, who's almost as old as you. We wanted to have many more. But I wasn't able to have any more... after Luca. I lost him when I was six months pregnant. A few more days and he'd have made it. In these cases the doctors suggest you see the baby, otherwise goodness knows what you'll imagine... So we held him for a few minutes. He was perfect. He had... Riko's hands ! He was perfect. I've always wondered if he managed to take... at least one breath of our air. I'm sorry. It was a long time ago. Have you been married long ? Very long. Maybe too long. Pavak always says that he's a good man. - Really ? - He always says: "Honest". Honest... That's not a family. - It's an asylum. - What commotion. Wonderful commotion. I need to tell you something. However much you think I'm a shit, just know that I feel even worse. But I've not come to say sorry, I know that's not enough. I came to tell you that it was my fault. And partly her fault too... But also yours ! Because you don't realise who you're living with. And how lucky you are ! It wasn't done to spite you ! It wasn't. I don't have time to eat now, sit down. Please. Please, sit down. I know what happens now, you simply don't say a word. And I don't know what you're thinking, but I imagine the worst. But you're fine with that, so you don't have to ask. Because you never ask, not ever. You never ask how my day's been, whether I want to do something different, or what I'm thinking, or what I'm feeling... So I end up doing a monologue. This time too. It happened only once. Just once. It shouldn't have happened, I know. But it happened only... once. Is that enough for you ? That's enough, yes. Because I've never felt so guilty in all my life. And I've never been so disgusted with myself. Because you need to know, that in this case too, like in every other moment during all these years together, I've never... and I mean never, I've never budged an inch, not even for one second. I have always been here. Even when I knew for a fact that you were screwing around. I think about Luca every day. Still now. Sometimes I have the feeling... the physical feeling, that he's here. And still now, every day, I think about how you were there for me when we lost him. But it's always been that way. You and I have always stuck together through everything, everything. And we're still here. I know why I'm still here. No one's ever held a gun to your head. Can we eat now ? Goon! Go on, Riko ! Harder ! Harder ! Thanks. Thanks. Here's 2,000. It's the last bit I can give you. You can't say I dealt you the final blow. This used to be the foundry. Assemblage. Lacquering. The shipment section was down there. Half of Reggio worked here. A city within a city. An awesome venue for an illegal rave. Don't you dare ! It needs fixing up, I need your help. I'm ready. How ridiculous do we look ? I look gorgeous. Wonderful ! You look wonderful ! Okay... Okay. We are gathered here to celebrate the "real" marriage... of these two souls, not "soles", who are soulmates... - And housemates and flatmates ! - Who with today's ceremony... - intend to defy the perils of time. - Keep it simple ! - Riccardo Tirelli and Sara Vercesi ? - I think so. "I think so..." Say yes ! Can you do that ? Yes. After this trial period you've had of 90 odd years, it's now time to decide if you want to live together until death do you part. Okay, he's crossing his fingers, to hell with this ! You call this a proper wedding ceremony ? Do you want to take my place ? Do you, Riccardo, really want to spend the rest of your life with Sara here ? - If you really insist... - Go fuck yourselves ! No, come on, I was joking ! I do. Do you, Sara, despite what you've seen and endured so far, want to tempt fate and go against logic and continue to share misfortune, let's be honest, with Riccardo here ? I do! The rings. By the power vested in me, I declare you... off your rockers but united till the end. May the force be with you and with my spirit. Kiss the bride ! What's so funny ? We honeymooned in Italy, yes. What's wrong with that ? What did we see... So much stuff. So much stuff. What did you do in August? Nice ! I'll get back to you about Saturday, okay ? Sorry I Did you get my text saying I'd be late ? Hold on, wait... Did you do this or is someone hiding in the house ? I can make it all disappear in a flash. You have to eat it all up. And you have to say "delicious" every three minutes. I've put two bottles of water by the bed. Is that your subtle way of telling me that I overdid it with the salt ? I have to go see my folks tomorrow. I haven't been in ages. Whatever your post-dinner plans were... the image of your folks is putting me off mine. Sorry. I'll fix that. You can't stay off your phone ! I'll be at the factory in 10 minutes. What is it? The stench. They realised because of the stench. They took him away as soon as possible... because of the stench. Five days ! Shit, Riko, he'd been dead five days ! And no one had called him. Not even us. Not even us. - What is it, Pietro ? - I heard that you're back. - Yes. - I sent you an email, have a read. - Not now, come on. - It's about him. Bye. I don't know if I should send this, but here goes. How did I get here ? Have any of you ever thought of killing yourselves ? I have. Not all the time. Just every so often. The fact is, when you have a rotten heart like mine, in the physical sense, because spiritually speaking it's splendid... I mean, when you have a rotten heart, every day is like a game of Russian Roulette. So if it has to happen, why can't I be the one to decide when to go ? But, I wouldn't slit my wrists, I wouldn't shoot myself, I definitely wouldn't swallow poison, so I thought of the Po River... It's no Golden Gate Bridge, but the currents would drag you down. Otherwise, the putrid water will finish you off. And if you survive the currents and putrid water, that means your time's not up, that you have to wait, end of story. The Po River ! It's a good compromise, don't you think ? You try then nature decides. Anyway... How did I get here ? In spurts. And what am I doing here ? Everything I can. Poor guy! He died young. But with his heart, his days were numbered. There was a nice article in the paper. He was a real artist. "Everyone loved him, he was a real artist..." Listen to you ! With all due respect for the tragedy, let's be honest... He may have been an artist but he'd never done fuck all. Apart from squandering his family's wealth. It's always the same old story. The typical clich of the artist. It's either heroin, or coke, or gambling. And now, perhaps, his works will soar in value. Come on ! - Apologize. - Apologize ? Who to ? And what for ? For saying what I think ? - Apologize. - Listen, he was your friend... Sucks for you. Come in, Riko. Sit down. "The regulations are to blame. Italian pork must be of a certain quality, unlike imported pork, which is cheaper. The market, the recession is to blame... You can't imagine, Riko, how awful we feel having to do this. If there were another option, we'd choose it. But there isn't." - Listen... - No, it's fine. When I started here, 30 years ago, the Veroni family still ran it. Mr Arnaldo Veroni always maintained a presence here. I don't even know who you are. The market, the regulations, the recession... You think I don't understand ? I do ! But all I can say is fuck you ! Well... First of all, thanks for sparing me from having to do my speech... I'm so sick of repeating it. We've prepared a bonus for you along with your redundancy pay. We managed to make Crotti drop the charges. You broke his nose and jaw, it wasn't simple. We'll give you a clean reference. I'll allow for your "fuck you" and good luck. Even at breakfast ? It's a beautiful day. Let's do something, come on ! Riccione ? Cinque Terre. See if Angela's free. Go with her. I think you should stop looking for work for a while. You've become obsessed. We'll manage, the salon's doing well. Cesenatico ? Saint Tropez ? Monte Carlo ! All dressed up. I'll wear that amazing dress, with the low-cut neckline. You'll wear big sunglasses. Found a job ? No luck ? Don't worry, you'll find something. Have you just woken up ? It all gets messed up. Day, night... Can't you get it up 7 That happens. How do you get through the day ? I can't take it anymore. He just sits there, saying nothing... Matteo keeps calling him, so do Max and Patrizio... I know. He won't even turn his phone on. He just sits in front of the TV with the volume off. I have to take him to the therapist or he won't go. I have to feed him his medication. - He'll pull through, I'm sure. - I'm not, it's been six months. He doesn't even wash anymore. Every so often I force myself to make love but even there... I do all the work. - Is he still looking for work ? - Not really. I understand, it's constant rejections. But... We can still get by, it's not that. You know that's not how it works. It's not just about the wage packet. Let's go out dancing. It wasn't a question. Come on. What a beauty ! Answer, dammit ! Answer. Come on, dad. Eat. No, you have to eat ! Don't say you don't like what I've made. I'm sick to death of this ! I work all day like a slave and you don't lift a finger! Snap out of it ! Do something ! Eat your soup ! I spent half an hour making it, you have to eat it. Eat, you're too thin. Eat. Eat. Eat. Come on ! Fuck you g Fuck you g Come here. Come here. Hey, nutcase ! I mean, just saying... Yes, you nutcase ! Shall we go for a drink ? You'd rather stay here in the car ? It's up to you. The last time I saw you, you spoke. Whereas you've never stopped. Wait, you threw yourself into the Po River... Are you radioactive ? If you are, you should tell me. If you become like Hulk, we'll open a circus just for you. - Okay ? - Fuck you ! He threw himself into the Po River ! Cut it out! Hi. Lidia told me that you met up with Max. I'm glad. I didn't fancy cooking, I got us some pizzas. - Is there a film on ? - Yes. This is good one ! But we have to turn it up, even just for the music. I'll get something to drink. Beer, Coke, water ? You choose. Yes ? Yes ? Yes I Yes I Hi, Carnival. Where are you ? Wherever you are, maybe these words will reach you. Ever think I'd be a dogsbody in a restaurant in Frankfurt ? It's not a bad city. A bit harsh... even its name: Frankfurt. I've been here for four months now and, well... It's tough. But I'm tough too. You have to take the work you get, if you can. Pavak found me the job, he's got relatives here. It's an Italian restaurant, with lots of Italian customers, Italian food... I do quite well, at the end of the day. It's well-paid. I'm going to be a dad again next month. Do you find that funny ? So do I. Sara's terrified. Every day I tell her that the baby will be healthy and strong. It's a girl. I don't just say it to reassure her but because I know that's how it will be. You know that Sara beat me up once ? Proper blows, by the way. Because I'd decided to come here. And even now, every goddamn day, she treats me like a kid. Enough ! Leave that place ! Come home ! But the point is precisely that home. I'm not going to sell that house. Maybe one day one of my children will sell it. But I'm not selling it. Because I want to go back. Because I will go back. I'll go back. I read somewhere that it takes seven years for our cells to die and make way for new ones. As I've got plenty of time to think, I was wondering: "How come we're still us ? What's that particle made of that survives once our cells die ?" I'm made of my family, I'm made of you, of Max, of all the others. We're made of our small city, of its walls, of the stories we've been told about it and of others like us. We're made of that air. I know you'll laugh when I tell you that I've realized what being homesick means. But it's true. It's so strong I sometimes think that you can't confine air. Then it seems like I can see, from here, from far away, that perhaps in some way, somehow, we're also made of Trieste, Milan, Cagliari, Lecce, Venice, Pescara, Palermo. Perhaps we're made of beauty and putridness. Of lies, of fear. Of chaos and wonders. And we're also made of last ditch efforts. A series of last ditch efforts. We're made of contempt... and yes... of love. Do you think I've become sentimental ? Yes... I'm waiting to see how things work out. But at least I know they will work out, I'm sure of that. Wherever you are, take care of yourself. And wherever you are, I'm sending you a big hug. P.S. The other day Pietro sent me an email with a quote by Cesare Pavese. This is what it said: "You need a village, if only for the pleasure of leaving it. Your own village means that you are not alone. That you know that in the people and the plants and the soil, there is something of you, that even when you are not there, it waits to welcome you back." WHAT ARE YOU DOING THERE ? What am I doing here ? What am I doing here... |
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