Kiro Newsradio 710
Welcome back to The Jack Black Show.
I'm Jack Black.
Before the break,
we were talking to Maggie from Magnolia.
So, let me get this straight, Maggie.
From an evolutionary point of view...
men have basically outserved their function
as hunter/providers...
and according to you,
testosterone is going to destroy the world?
Look, all I'm saying is...
after five marriages, I think I know
something about men, you know?
Ditz.
I mean, there is a difference
between men and women.
So you're saying...
What I'm saying is
that even when we're kids...
girls are nurturers,
boys are aggressors, that's all.
Girls want to play with dolls,
and boys want to play with...
- Themselves?
- ... A go n A s A.
Men are what's wrong with the world.
Well, ma'am, speaking as Jack Black,
your radio therapist...
I have just two words of advice:
- Stop whining!
- Stop whining!
- Next caller.
- Next caller.
I don't know how you can even call yourself
a therapist...
when you don't believe people should talk...
about their problems.
Isn't modern therapy...
Hey, modern therapy is the problem.
People wallowing in their own
pathetic guilt at $100 an hour...
instead of just getting on with it.
If more people listened to me,
fewer people would listen to me.
But the work I've done on my inner child...
has really helped...
Sir, I've two words of advice
for your inner child:
Grow up!
Next caller.
Yeah, hi.
Go ahead, caller.
I need you to help me,
to explain someone to me.
Ashley, do you know what time it is?
Go ahead, Bubba from Richmond Beach.
DAD
Yeah, I just wanted to call and say
that your show really offends me.
Where you calling from?
I'm at home.
Has someone got a gun to your head?
I've been doing it for three years.
Three words of advice, my friend:
- Get a life!
- Get a life!
- Next caller.
- Hi.
Hello, Rochelle from Rhode Island...
Ashley, honey.
You wanna give me a hand
with the groceries?
And please don't listen to that garbage.
But it's Daddy's show.
I know.
Joshua, when I said
grab a bag out of the car...
I meant something a bit bigger.
Rachel, Gwendolyn, Consuelo,
whatever you want to call yourself...
Okay, guys, let's go.
Your father's gonna be here any minute.
I just have two words of advice for you:
- Stop whining!
- Stop whining!
Next caller.
Don't worry. He'll be here.
Dad!
- Hi, Joshua.
- Dad.
You guys ready to cruise?
What's with this research stuff?
They've been really looking forward to this.
They haven't spent any quality time
with you since last summer.
- It's not gonna be a problem. I promise.
- Right.
Come here. I love you guys.
You have a good time, okay? Come here.
"Interstate five."
"Exit 176."
"Exit 177."
U.S.-CANADA CUSTOMS - 5 Miles
How long is this ride, Dad?
Just a second, Josh. Yeah, Albert.
You have my numbers, right?
You can reach me on my cell,
or if that's busy, fax me in the car.
"Exit 301."
"Watch for falling rock."
"Welcome to Glenorky, home of Orky."
GLENORKY - ORKY It's about time.
Dad, who's Orky?
I know it is only four weeks,
Albert, but I will get it done.
You have my word.
Dad?
Honey, can you get that, please?
It's somewhere in the back.
They can give you brain cancer, you know.
Well, you can call me then.
He has my numbers, right?
Major roadkill.
Dad, I got a close-up using the image...
Two words of advice AI: Re-lax.
Did you say something, honey?
I just wanted to know who Orky was.
He's a stupid tourist attraction,
like the Loch Ness monster, O Vacant One.
Am I the only one who hears that?
All I want to know is if he's real or not.
- What, honey?
- That thing, Orky.
Probably some ancient Indian myth.
You know, some Aboriginal deity.
"Space, the final frontier."
Josh, get a life.
Dad, I bet I could drive this thing.
- Dad.
- One second.
Where are we?
I don't know. We passed a bridge.
Left at the Dairy Queen?
I don't know. It's your map!
Dr. WANDA BELL - PSYCHIATRIS GROUP THERAPY - SESSIONS DAILY
ENQUIRE WITHIN
Okay, let's get started. Hi, everyone.
Hi, Dr Bell.
Today we have a new recruit.
Frank has come to us for help.
Frank, do you want to tell the others
what you told me?
Hi. I'm...
Bob.
Hi, Bob.
Hi, Bob.
Frank, it's okay to use your real name here.
All right.
I'm Frank.
Frank.
- Hi, Frank.
- Hi.
And my body was...
inhabited by...
Orky.
Oh, God. See, now we're into it.
Okay, here we go.
I told you about Orky, huh? Didn't I say it?
I did, huh?
He was in my body.
Did you get to go into his cave?
He was you and you were him, right?
This isn't happening. I'm not hearing this.
I don't believe in monsters
'cause monsters don't exist.
Exactly what happened to me. In his cave...
Gentlemen. Gentlemen!
Right.
Go ahead, Frank.
Well, at first...
I was scared.
And then...
it was amazing.
I could actually breathe underwater.
And when you came to, you found yourself
building a sand castle?
I don't believe in monsters,
'cause monsters don't exist.
It didn't inhabit my body.
I didn't become a fish.
Gentlemen. Gentlemen.
Dad, is this it?
Looks like some demented tepee
or something.
We have a dock. Our own dock.
This is great!
Dad, come look!
Water.
Uncarbonated.
It's beautiful, isn't it?
You're just like your mother.
No, it's good. That's good.
Want to race to the beach?
- On your marks, get...
- Wait, wait.
Hello.
Hello.
Hi.
"Dad's Easter. June 20th."
I hate to tell you this, Ash, but I don't
think there's a cassette player here.
That's okay, I can hear them in my head.
I just locked that.
Yeah.
- Leave it locked!
- Chicken. Chicken.
I'm not chicken.
Just close the damn window!
- What are you chicken of?
- Josh!
What is going on?
Hormones.
I asked him to close the window,
and he called me a chicken.
You're two rational human beings,
I've got work to do.
Three words: Deal with it.
Daddy! Hey, Dad!
Daddy!
Dad!
Dad!
The monster! He's real! He ate my cookies.
You mean, you lost your cookies.
Dad!
Greetings!
I'm Joe Pickled Trout,
your property manager.
Dad! Orky, he ate my cookies.
Don't worry about it, honey.
Get you some more.
Morning.
It's really my uncle Kipper's property.
He lives in the main house,
but he's past the day.
About three fries short of a happy meal.
We keep him sedated.
I bet I could drive this.
How about this?
Only $500 extra for the month.
I could definitely drive that.
Come on, Dad.
Anyone for a tour?
It's on the house.
There hasn't been a sighting since '89,
so business is kind of slow.
How long has this Orky thing
been a tourist attraction?
Only since I took over.
My uncle Kipper has considered himself
a bit of a purist.
- Joe!
- Hey, Bobby. Hey, Mary Elle.
Now he thinks
I've somehow gone commercial.
Joe's Orky EMPORIUM
Here we are, Orky Central.
Big bucks scientific expedition.
The Japanese have developed this new,
super hi-tech radar...
that can sweep the entire lake.
They just might find old Orky,
unless he pulls one of his special tricks.
Tricks?
Native legend has it that he can
change himself into another animal.
Even a human being.
That's why he's never been caught.
Bet I could drive that.
What would they do if they found him?
Probably turn him into a movie star.
More like giant sushi. Slice and dice, baby.
No, he's considered
a sacred creature in Japan.
They wouldn't harm him.
They just want to get a closer look at him.
Who are those one-armed dudes?
They're the Hardy brothers.
They were working
on the docks at the mill one night...
when Orky leapt right out of the lake
and took an arm off each of them.
Every time a new expedition comes to town,
they follow right behind them...
waiting for the right moment to get revenge.
They're out for blood.
Dad, could I ask you something?
Hold on, honey.
Too sweet.
Why don't you go out and play?
There is nothing to do here.
Use your imagination.
CHAPTER 1
Can I take the boat out
and go look for Ashley's monster?
Could be worth millions.
You know, for college.
Later.
Come on, guys, I got work to do.
Go on. Get out of here, will you?
Josh, can we go back now?
In a sec, Ash.
I'm doing a man thing here.
Staring death in the face.
Stuff like that.
God, Ashley, get a grip!
Stinks.
I knew it, I knew it!
I just called to say we arrived safely.
Why do we always have to get into this?
Of course, I wanna spend time with her.
Yeah, sure. That's right, Beth.
Just because I... Hey, I took them
on this stupid vacation, didn't I?
What more do you want?
That colour becomes you.
You park here often?
Sorry, it's a new toy.
One of these talking security systems.
Hi. Jack Black.
Wanda Bell.
So do you park here often?
I have a patient here. Sedatives.
You're a doctor.
Well, actually, I'm a psychiatrist.
Really?
That makes us colleagues.
You're a psychiatrist?
How could anyone be neurotic up here?
Can I help you with that?
You actually get business?
I escaped the city figuring
that I'd be practising general medicine...
but when I got here,
I discovered a group of men...
who all have an identical psychosis.
What? Like a cult?
End of the world sort of thing?
No, they all believe
they've been inhabited by a lake monster.
Sorry.
There's nothing I want more
than to help them get well again.
Who's there?
I know that smell. It's you, isn't it?
And Katrina,
who's my very best friend at school...
well, her mum's always forgetting her keys.
And this one time,
we were at a softball game...
and she didn't have them...
so we had to use my brother's bat
to break the window.
No.
I don't remember what she was wearing.
God! Can't you just find her?
Missing child?
That's nof mine.
No, no. He's mine.
I need a piece of your daughter's clothing.
For my dog.
And the reason I could tell it was you
was because you have really bad breath.
No of fence.
Mum says you get bad breath
when you're sick.
Are you sick?
Well, I'm only gonna give you
one more of these...
'cause if you are,
I don't want you getting any sicker.
None of us could breathe.
Guess I better find a place to sleep.
Safe from wild animals
and highway perverts.
Ashley!
Ashley!
It's okay. I know what I'm doing.
Ashley!
Ashley!
Please. No.
Ashley!
Ashley?
Oh, my God!
Help!
Help! Please.
I wasn't chasing monsters.
He'll be okay, Ash.
There you are.
Why don't you come down to the kitchen?
I'll make you some grapefruit
and free-range eggs.
Is he gonna die?
No, honey.
No.
He's just had a mild craniocerebral trauma.
A concussion.
When will he get better?
- Dad!
- Ashley?
- Ashley?
- She's right here, she's all right.
- Ashley?
- Dad!
Ashley, you're all right.
She's fine. Everybody's fine.
- I thought...
- Are you okay, Dad?
Yeah. Yeah. You're not hurt.
Dad, you saved me.
If you hadn't of catched me...
Kids, let's give him a chance to rest. Okay?
He'll be home very soon.
Jack, open your eye for me. Keep it open.
I had the weirdest dream.
PreSun
You're gonna die of melanoma.
I'm gonna die of boredom.
CHAPTER 1
You guys wanna have some fun?
Don't you guys want a turn? Be a lot faster.
Wouldn't it be faster just to take a plane?
No. This is the only way to get to China.
I used to try this all the time by myself
when I was a kid...
but I could never get there
because I always had to do it...
myself.
- Yeah, I bet.
- My dad never helped.
He was too...
Dad, I thought you said
you didn't remember your childhood.
That it was locked
in the deepest recesses of your mind.
It's okay, Dad. I'll help you dig to China.
Dad!
Isn't it time we did that
father-son bonding thing or something?
Can't we do something normal?
Like take this puppy out for a spin?
I'm supposed to wanna do
that kind of thing at my age.
It's a teen thing.
Too noisy.
Besides, we must be getting close.
Yup! Shouldn't be long now.
Come on, Dad. You promised.
This is bullshit!
This place sucks!
Did I say something?
What are we gonna do with all this sand?
And there was nothing
little Jackie wanted more...
than to be a knight
at King Arthur's round table.
But everyone just said:
"It'll never happen, pal. You're too puny."
Anyway, Jackie knew
that King Arthur's knights...
were scheduled to fight the Mud People...
the very next day
on the top of Mud Mountain at noon.
So he got up early,
and he climbed the mountain...
and he waited by a small metal cross
embedded in the top of the hill.
Pretty soon,
he heard the sound of marching.
But to his horror, it was the Mud People.
They had arrived an hour early
because they're Mud People.
Anyway, Mud People all around.
Jackie figured he'd better do something.
So he pulled the metal cross
out of the ground.
But to his surprise...
the metal cross
turned out to be a huge sword.
Well, the Mud People,
they just gurgled and laughed...
and then something incredible
started to happen.
Mud Mountain began to tremble...
and shake and grow.
And the shaking threw the Mud People
off their slimy feet.
And Jackie just stood there speechless...
as the head of this giant dragon...
appeared and said:
"Thanks, bubba."
"That sword's been a pain in my neck
for a long time."
Because Mud Mountain...
was actually the back of a giant dragon
that had been asleep for centuries.
Jackie woke him up.
Yes, he did.
And all of King Arthur's court cheered...
as Jackie returned riding his dragon...
who he called Curtis
because that was his name.
So what happened to Jackie and Curtis?
Did they live happily ever after?
No.
They just sort of lost touch.
It's not a very good ending.
No, it isn't, is it?
In fact, Dad, it sucks.
It's not fair!
Why did we even rent the damn boat?
You're right, Josh.
We'll turn the keys in tomorrow.
They're on the kitchen table.
No, that's not what I mean.
This is seriously affecting my development.
Joshua, look. He's having fun.
Dad, he's a moron.
Hiro! Hiro!
You're gonna look great in this hat.
You guys wanna hang out here
while I drop by Dr Bell's?
I'll come with you.
No, no, thanks, honey.
- It doesn't do anything.
- Go on.
A hundred?
Enjoy yourselves. I won't be long.
Dad, this is...
Frank.
The last time we met, you were describing
the euphoria you experienced...
during your hallucination with the monster.
Jack!
Everyone, this is Dr Jack Black,
a colleague of mine.
Hi, Jack.
Hi, Jack.
Jack, did you want to join us?
Frank, do you have anything
you want to say?
Now, Frank...
why did this experience make you happy?
Because he suddenly felt free.
- Like a kid again.
- Yeah.
Yeah, like a kid again.
Frank, do you have anything
you want to say?
No.
Frank, don't worry.
It'll pass.
Actually, it sort of comes and goes.
What does?
Feeling scared.
Simon, why don't we let Frank
describe his own feelings.
How are you feeling, Frank?
Scared.
Now, Frank, that's what Simon said.
It's very important
that you find your own words...
to describe your own feelings
and your own experiences.
So are you saying
you're no longer as happy...
as you once were about your experience?
No.
It's just that sometimes,
it feels as though someone...
Yes, Frank?
- Tell them.
- Someone's trying to...
Someone wants to...
Kill you!
- Yes.
- Yeah.
Like there's something really bad out there.
Like evil forces all around you.
- It's like, in the air you breathe.
- Everywhere.
And it's only getting worse.
Yeah!
- And voices, like giant mosquito noises.
- Yeah, mosquito noises.
Except they're all distorted, like...
Like that. Yeah.
I don't hear buzzing. I
don't scratch my gut.
I don't believe in Orky.
I'm not a nut. No!
All right. Gentlemen. Everybody! Hey, guys!
Guys! Guys?
Oh, my!
Keep an eye on them.
If they get any closer to the site,
we'll have to move to plan "B".
Damn monster-huggers.
Dump her in the usual spot, boys,
and keep a low profile.
Okay, boss.
China?
Hey, wait!
Hey!
Hey.
Find anything yet?
I don't understand it.
There must be a tunnel down here
or something.
You think?
I always figured digging
is kind of like swinging.
If you swing high enough,
you get some place magical.
Like breaking the sound barrier.
Only harder.
Sure would like to break through, though.
Dad, we should go inside.
It's gonna rain.
Wait, we gotta try something.
It'll be great.
That one over there.
That is Columbus Discoverus formation.
"Columbus Discoverus?"
There's no such thing.
Yeah? Look carefully.
See it?
You have to look really,
really close to see it.
Forget everything you think you know
and really look.
- Right there.
- I think I see th e Santa Maria.
Yeah, and I see the Pinto.
- Pinta!
- Come on. Help me.
- What the hell?
- This is weird!
Over there! Right there. Guess.
Oh, my God!
I see a bunny.
The Energizer.
Or is it a bird? A bald eagle.
I see smoke signals.
This is incredible, Dad.
Me and my grandpa used to do this
all the time when I was a kid.
He told me...
that the sky is the one thing
that witnesses all of history...
and records it.
It's full of really incredible things.
You just gotta look for them.
Do it again, Dad.
Yeah, do more.
Yeah?
Okay.
Ready?
Behold.
The Fourth of July!
Hey, Uncle Kipper.
Sorry I'm late.
Here's the new supply of sedatives.
- Dad, that was awesome.
- It was.
Timber!
Hi.
Wanda, I'm sorry about yesterday.
Last night I read your latest work:
"Male Drumbeating
Without the Touchy-feely Stuff."
Really sensitive.
Do you always make fun of your patients?
Stop whining!
Wanda...
I really like you.
I mean like a lot.
First time I met you,
I couldn't believe how beautiful you were.
- And funny.
- Dad.
No, she's really funny.
Great, Jack, you're bleeding.
You better come in and get that redressed.
And I'd like to do some tests.
Tests?
Now, tell me what you see.
Jack, could you please try to concentrate?
Children.
Playing.
Thousands of them.
But one's missing.
That's what you see?
Did you draw this?
Because it's really good.
Jack, have you noticed
anything unusual since your accident?
Like difficulty concentrating?
Have you been experiencing
intense feelings of joy and fear?
Jack, let me see your stomach.
The rash.
Jack, have you seen the monster?
What? Monster? No.
No. That was a dream.
From my accident.
This is incredible. I don't believe it.
Somehow you have taken on the psychoses
of my other patients.
But that was just a dream.
Wasn't it?
I'm gonna have to keep you here
for observation.
Do want me to shut the window tonight?
It's okay. It's okay.
I can't reach Mum.
What are those for?
They're for him.
I think he might be able to help.
Ashley, would you knock it off
with that stuff?
- It's not funny.
- But...
Don't talk to Dad about it 'cause
you're gonna get him locked up for good!
They're gonna throw him in some loony bin,
and we're never gonna see him again.
But Josh, there is a monster.
He ate my cookies.
Damn it, Ashley. Just get off it, will you?
This is not a game anymore.
Grow up.
Hey, Josh.
Okay, but I wanna see you swallow
those pills.
Why did he write Dad's name on his house?
I don't know.
Can you help our dad?
This guy's gone wacko.
"Omni Sweet?"
Probably on some artificial sugar high
or something.
I think he wants some more.
I saw some in our cabin.
Why don't you kids go and play now?
Hello? Yes, Doctor.
Yes, everything's fine.
Okay. Bye-bye.
Come on, now.
Down the hatch like a good boy.
I will explain everything when we get there.
Come, we must hurry!
What does this have to do with our dad?
Everything.
It's here somewhere.
I know it's here.
Faster. We must go faster.
We?
Where are we?
Give me a hand.
It's here. I know it's here.
Here it is.
Not so long ago,
man could become animal...
and animal could become man.
Back and forth, whenever they wanted.
Animals could shed their skins...
and humans could become anything.
A wolf, a fish, a bird.
Did you ever have dreams about flying?
Yeah.
We all have those.
It's part of our secret memory
of those times.
What does this have to do with our dad?
There's more.
Orky!
They're killing him
by putting toxins in the lake.
That's what he's been trying to tell us.
Your father, and the others.
It's the only way he knows how.
His breath. His breath was bad.
I knew he was sick.
Wait. Are you trying to tell me...
that my dad's
some sort of messenger or something?
He's sick 'cause Orky's sick.
I'm glad you believed him.
That's why he came to you.
As you grow...
trust your heart as much as your mind.
It's the best part of you.
Now go tell your dad.
He has to know.
I'll be fine.
I've found nothing for 30 metres down.
Nothing's moving.
I will continue searching. Over.
Ranger, here. Over.
I see something falling at five degrees.
Well?
We got trouble, boss.
Japs came within 50 yards of the dump site.
I think it's time to move to plan "B".
Dad! Dad, you're not crazy.
You're a messenger for Orky.
You're just trying to
tell us that he's sick.
Dad, is that what you're trying to tell us?
There is no monster.
There is no monster.
It was only a dream.
Those pills.
GLENORKY HOSPITAL
Quiet.
There he is again. Hey!
He's that little dude from China.
I told you.
I think he's trying to tell us something.
That's him!
I told you. Come on.
This way.
Don't lose him. Come on, let's go!
Through here.
This will be worth millions.
I'll finally get my own wheels.
What's he doing?
Hurry up. Come on!
What do you think, boss?
It's got a few leaks, but it'll do.
It's a fake.
The whole thing is a fake.
This is going to be so good.
But he ate my cookies.
Fill her up and you're off, boys.
It's a perfect night.
Come on, guys.
There's something going on here.
I'm gonna find out what it is.
Must cost big bucks
to dispose of this stuff, huh?
I mean, not many places
take hazardous waste these days.
I know that smell.
Just land her on shore,
right in the middle of town.
- Yeah.
- And confess.
Tell the world it's been a hoax
all these years.
An attempt to create a tourist industry.
No more ridiculous foreigners bothering us
with their effeminate little submarines.
No more whining natives claiming...
that we're endangering
an endangered species.
We're left alone to go about our business.
Everybody's happy.
Especially me.
An inspired, creative, cerebral plan,
don't you think?
I hate violence.
Josh, we can't let him do this.
You stay here and keep a lookout.
I'm gonna see if I can sabotage that thing.
One more question.
Where's the men's room?
Thank you.
Come on.
Josh, they heard us.
We gotta get out of here.
Josh!
I can drive this.
We can use it as evidence.
Bon voyage.
And remember, you never heard of me.
Go on, get back there. Come on, come on.
Go, go, go.
Josh, what are we gonna do?
Wait until he gets out,
then we'll go to the police.
Inspiration. Inspiration.
Yes!
God, I'm good.
Okay. And...
bingo.
JOE'S ORKY EMPORIUM
I'm out of here.
Where did he go?
What's happening?
I don't know. Something's wrong.
Big trouble. Okay.
Big trouble.
What's he doing? What the...
Josh!
Stop. Stop. Stop.
- Turn!
- I'm trying!
No, no, Josh! No, turn. No! Turn!
- Find the brake!
- Found it!
We hit it!
That colossal idiot!
Josh.
We gotta get out of here. Let's go!
Come on, let's go!
Josh, open it.
It's stuck.
That's the dump site.
No. Not there!
Anywhere but there!
There's gotta be a pump switch
in here somewhere.
- Found it! Found it.
- Josh, it's sinking fast.
Help!
Help, please help!
They're probably looking for us right now.
It's been a long time.
They probably don't even know
we're missing.
Besides...
good luck finding us.
Wait. Did you guys hear that?
- That was me.
- What are you doing?
I'm calling Orky. He'll hear us that way.
Ash, this is Orky.
It's a fake.
Get a grip.
Jack?
Jack?
Jack, what are you doing?
Trying to find my kids.
Where are they today, Jack?
Jack, are you okay?
Jack, it's gonna be all right. Come on up.
One step at a time.
And I saw a... Big, big, huge...
That little idiot. Look at him.
He's confessing.
Well, isn't that what he was
supposed to do?
It wasn't supposed to sink, you moron.
Now they're gonna go looking for it.
Take the explosives and rig the dump site.
I hope Dad will be all right.
Yeah. Me, too.
What was that?
Orky?
Hey, we're rescued!
I can't believe it. They actually found us.
Yes! Yes.
- Josh.
- What? What is it?
Shit.
It's those one-armed dudes.
Damn it!
We're moving.
Well, well, well,
what have you boys been up to?
- There's something down there!
- Yeah, there's something down there!
Yeah, and it's something big!
We was just following orders.
Miller's gonna kill you.
Mack Miller?
What do you say we take a little ride, boys?
Come on, Orky. Hurry!
He'd better, or we're history.
Where are we?
- Dad?
- Daddy!
Hey, guys.
Come on. Are you all right?
How did you get here?
Gravity?
What is this place?
I love you guys so much.
Who are you?
That's Hiro. He's from China.
Hey, how you doing, Hiro?
I have been here before.
This place was in my dream.
This place is real!
This is it.
Dad! This is where he lives.
Orky.
Hi. It's me.
It's all right.
You like your nose tickled?
I guess so.
Hey, boy.
You saved our lives.
How you doing?
I love you, Orky.
Dad, he's bleeding.
Dad, look at his back.
Oh, God.
It could be the toxins, Dad.
What's happening, Daddy?
I think he's dying, honey.
No!
Hey! Hey, come on!
Come on. No.
- Please. Please, no!
- Come on.
- Daddy, no. Daddy.
- Orky.
Orky, no. No.
Please, no.
Give him space, honey.
No, Daddy. Please.
Please. No, no.
Orky, I won't let you die. Please don't die.
No. No. Please, no.
I'm sorry, honey.
It's all right. Come here.
He's been sick for a long time.
He's out of pain.
Look at that. Is that a sand castle?
All right, all right, that's good.
That's good. Keep going.
Buddy, move it! Get away from the hole.
We gotta keep this hole clear.
Don't let them find him, okay?
Are you okay, honey?
Are you all right?
Jack?
Mr Black?
Did you see anything down there?
No. I didn't see anything.
Can you tell us what it was like?
There's nothing down there.
There's nothing.
Rope up and let's get a shot anyway.
We need it for the story.
Dad, no.
Hey, did you hear what I said?
Hey, are you listening to me?
There is nothing down there.
I mean it.
Sheriff? It's not safe.
Don't be silly. He'll be fine.
It's not safe!
Please. Don't...
A Dad.
Oh, no.
We're gonna need some...
I told you everything I know, Wanda.
Just as it happened.
No one else knows except the group.
Jack, it's not that I don't believe you.
It's just that it makes no rational sense.
Wait.
For what it's worth...
I am finding the irrational
pretty damn exciting these days.
God.
There's nothing I'd like more
than to see things the way you do.
Want to come in for a swim?
I know you miss him, Ash. I do, too.
I wonder what he's doing right now.
Nothing. He's gone.
He's only gone if you let him be.
Remember that story I told you,
the one about Curtis and Jackie?
Yeah.
Well, I remember the ending now.
Jackie grew up...
and he had a child of his own.
A beautiful little girl.
And that little girl was
so full of wonder...
and appreciation and knowledge...
and all the things
that her father had left behind.
Is this one of those metaphors, Dad?
When did you get so smart?
So what happened with the little girl?
How does it end?
I guess that's up to the little girl.
UNCLE KIPPER'S ORKY MUSEUM