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Mermaid Down (2019)
[radar pings]
[pinging continues] [ominous] [seagulls cawing] "A blanket of naps begets a handful of gnats," is what my granddaddy would say to me on egg and sausage mornings. Drink your water in a tub full of bourbon. And why, for the matter of scotch and my lady's crotch, do movies always act like mermaids breathe water? Obviously mermaids are mammals because they look part human, for goodness gracious, righteous books, and boots of my ancestors' sake. Do they not? - Why do they have hair then? - What? Why do mermaids have hair if they live in the water then? Why the mermaid has hair could be perhaps indeed for the same reason why the walrus has a mustache. Why does a walrus have a mustache? I don't know the answer to this, but it does indeed. Sure as a jury in a witch trial, they do. You think mermaids have... oh, have mustaches? Did you jump overboard while I was talking? Do you think they really have the coconut bras or, you know, those... those seashell bras? I think their tits are out. - You hope their tits are out. - Yeah. Fish guts on your glass. Hold on. [radio chatter] [seagulls cawing] My niece entering kindergarten. So you don't think sirens exist because no one in their right mind would draw attention to their death sentence. Exactly. Mermaids are definitely not sirens. Would you seduce a serial killer if you knew he was a serial killer who also wanted to eat you? I don't think people want to eat sirens. I think they want to fuck sirens. Still in case in point to be the same. No way sirens exist. But mermaids... Mermaids have been spotted for a hundred years around these waters, surfacing to have a look, curiosity getting the best of them. STANLEY: Maybe they really do exist. Maybe they do. Maybe if we waited long enough, say for a week or weeks on end, we could catch one surfacing, crawling out of the water to have a look at the flickering lights of the modern world. Maybe they're worth a fortune if you actually caught one and cut off her tail. Why would you wanna cut off a mermaid's-- You don't know how strong or resourceful a mermaid is. If she's survived this long, maybe she'd know how to gnaw through the rope and release herself from the boat. Logic and practicality would dictate that one must maim a mythical creature if one wants to transport a mythical creature. Then how then? We take our fire ax and chop her tail off, hack it off, tie the tail to the end of the boat and drag it with us, underwater, all the way back to shore, throw her human half into the bloody chum hole, then we sell her in two pieces, and make a million fucking dollars. Is the ax on the boat? On the wall, beneath the shotgun. Is there gas in the engine? Filled it this morning when I filled myself with coffee. Do we have food enough to last a week-long stakeout? Rotten crabs that'll make you upchuck over the side of the boat after every meal. And lots and lots of cigarettes to get the taste of smelly crab and fresh vomit out of your mouth. Well, then let's go cut off a mermaid's tail then. [upbeat] I like a song with a skip-a-dee-dee When the melody moves right along The kind of a tune you can tap with your feet I love an old-fashioned song La la la la la [continues] Hi, Susan? Susan, it's Dr. Beyer. Connect me to Markham. Hold on a second. Yeah, two. Thank you. [seagulls cawing] The birds are tugging on the net. Turn the engine off, so you don't scare away the mermaids. Start her up, check the engine. Knock anything off that might be growing on her. [engine stops] This boat's been quiet for longer sits. Put an Alvey out there. Baitcaster, barrel, berley, bobby cork, droppers, pollards. Engine doesn't scare away the birds. [cawing] Engine doesn't scare away the birds. Chrome slicers, flies, gang hooks. Okay, well... MOSS: Starboard! STANLEY: Got her! Get the net! [shouting] Over here! [engine starts] [squealing] STANLEY: Pull her up! Pull her up! [lounge] Oh, shit, pull her up! Get the crank! [engine idling] [continues] [squeals] [panting] [splash] [grunts] [panting] Hey, help, man! [squeals] - [bones crunch] - [Moss screams] [squealing] [snarling] Come here, bitch. - [straining] - [squealing] STANLEY: Oh, shit! Shit! Stop her from going overboard! I didn't tie her off yet! - [yelling] - [splash] [yelling] [cocks shotgun] [gunshot] [gunshot] [gunshot] Stop shooting! - [cocks shotgun] - Stop shooting! [gunshot] [gunshot] She's caught in the net. [ratcheting] [snarling] [shouts] [cawing] [clatter] - [chop] - [squealing] - [chop] - [squealing] [squealing] - [chop] - [squeals] [water dripping] I'm Dr. Beyer. I'm a psychiatrist. Why are you on my boat? I'm an interested buyer. I'm pretty, pretty rich. - Five million. - Not that rich. $500,000. Half a million. - Two million. - One. Why did you chop her tail off? [splash] [groaning] [click] [click] [click] [yelps] [gasping] [squealing] [metal creaking] [seagulls cawing] [dog barking] ['50s oldies] [TV playing] The tongue of a blue whale can be as large as a Volkswagen. [giggles] You know what that means. Hey, guys, let me get in on this. Good form today, Martha-Rose. Thank you, Reyna. Can I play? Can I play this time? You guys, hey, come on, let me get in on this. Go check the scores on the Olympics and then you can play. And see if they're saying when men's swimming starts! You know, June, you could ask your imaginary friend to steal some uppers for us. You know, since no one sees her but you. I really like the coffee here. Freshly ground. Was there an old insane asylum here or something? What are those pictures? Way before all this suburban development. Doc probably thought it'd be apropos to have his home here for the disturbed. Hallowed ground to a history buff. You know, it actually still exists. Right beneath us. Right beneath us. They didn't seal it 'cause it adds value to the house if it has a cellar. What the fuck was that? Yeah, you're supposed to go change that bulb. [distant squealing] Hey, so behind one of these doors in this house are steps that go down to the weirdest basement in the New World. That's not a real statistic though. Which door is it? [ominous] Hey, light bulb. That's Coffee's. His girlfriend hates guns, so he keeps it here. Doc does the same thing with his gun. Weird. [walkie-talkie chatter] [laughing] [mermaid squeals] June, June, I think there's a ghost in the bathroom! Guys, shut up! I think there's something in the bathroom. [giggling] Girls. Girls! Girls, do not engage June's fantasy! [growling] Oh, it is the new girl. And all of you acting like this is not gonna make her feel very at home, is it? Now, come on, back in the room, come on. We just wanted-- We were just saying hi. Good girls, come on. I wasn't gonna hurt her. [mermaid squealing] [mermaid squealing] [metal tinkling] [snarls, squeals] [splashing] GHOST GIRL: Her legs don't work. Is she paralyzed? No wheelchair. Think they're encouraging her to walk? Got it. She's in denial, like you. Gonna steal a wheelchair. They don't lock the storage closet. Even if it were locked, why not just walk through the door? Do you ever wonder why you can't seem to touch anyone, - but you can open cabinets? - What are you talking about? Look, you were here ten years ago, but you're certainly not here now. You can't walk through walls, through doors. You're not one of us. Will you shut the fuck up? [laughing] [ominous] [tinkling] [cartoony] [walkie-talkie chatter] [clatter] [mysterious] [walkie-talkie static] [Muzak] Rabbit? Do I see the bunnies? Where are they? [giggling] WOMAN: There's fresh coffee in the kitchen. Reyna? WOMAN ON SPEAKER: Medication. Did you guys hear the dog again last night? Can we not talk about that, Alex? Guys, what is the wheelchair doing in this room? Girls, where are the fish? Don't we have more fish? SUSAN: And the admission processing board have inquired about the new patient. You haven't filed anything yet. Just tell them we're working on the paperwork, ran out of forms. You have oodles of messages from the safety inspector wanting to seal off that entrance downstairs. I'm working down there. Turning the old asylum into a museum. [phone ringing] There's a perfectly good lock on the door. He says a locked door isn't enough. Assholes just need something to complain about. Beyer Mental Health. This is Susan. WOMAN: Hi, I have a question. My daughter just got out of rehab, - and I was wondering-- - Yes, we... Are you gonna join us today? Okay, suit yourself. The men's swimming matches are on. Sandra, maybe I should bring her breakfast in here? - Men in Speedos! - Okay. Men with big muscles! Don't bother replying. It's only a mental home. We're all clearly secure with ourselves. [grunts] Was that you? Are you okay? What are you looking at? - [squeals] - Hey, hey, hey, hey. Look what I got. Look what I got right here. Come on, come on. Shh. Shh. Easy. Look what I have got for you, huh? Hey, don't these look like toys? Pretty, huh? Very pretty. Do you like those? Look at this. Would you like to... What do you think about him? You don't have to be afraid. Ooh, that one smells like a fish tank. What do you think, huh? You can touch it. You can play with this if you wanted to. Oh, my God. You know sign language. [camera clicking] I think our new patient knows sign language. She tried to communicate with me. [camera clicking] [camera clicking] [camera clicking] [shivering] [glass shatters] Back off! Hey, stop it! No! - [laughing] - Shut up! - [snorts] - [laughs] [buzzing] [squeals] I'm gonna go get some more blankets so we can make a fort and stay safe, okay? - Dr. Miller. - Hi. Nice to finally meet you. She likes sitting here, and she likes it dark. Why would she like it in here? It smells like vomit. She's got something like seaweed growing out of her scalp. Really? What do you mean? I don't know what it is. I'm not gonna cut it until we do. She has clearly been traumatized. Let's at least give her-- [gasping] [thunder rumbling] SANDRA: All right, Linda, would you like to finish what you were saying? - We should watch real cable. - That asshole security guard... - We're all adults here. - is a certifiable psychotic. We don't need cartoons from the '40s to calm us down. - I saw him dragging Natasha... - Where has Natasha been anyway? Okay, okay, I cannot hear when you are both speaking at the same time. Now, come on. First of all, we're here to get better, not watch HBO, all right? Now, Linda-- Charlotte, put the book down. Thank you. Linda, would you like to finish what you were saying? - Linda? - [thunderclap] Would you like to finish what you were saying? [girls cheering] Okay, okay. I know that they flicker, but they never go off. [thunder rumbling] Okay, the lights flicker, but they never go out. - [girls laugh] - I'm freaking out. Who's hungry? Hey, can we all be quiet? She's trying to say something. - Hey, hey, hey, you guys... - [thunder rumbling] I'm sorry. Her signing is really cryptic. I can't understand her hand articulation. Can you slow it down, please? She's saying there's a girl in this room that none of us can see. I see her. Tell her I can see her too. Ask her if she can see Becky's eight-year-old twin standing by her, always asking her for his blanket. What the fuck? What the fuck? How-- How the fuck did you know that this was his blanket? She says she doesn't belong here. Join the sorority, sister. None of us belong here. Hey. [snaps fingers] Come out of it. MILLER: Belongs to the water? Ask her why she learned to sign. Pirates? Pirates? - Huh. - Sign language pirates. Don't interrupt the process, London. What do you care anyway, Sandra? You're just gonna leave us soon anyway. Who told you that? The doctoral trainees always leave us. And your timecard's punched enough holes to almost get you a free sandwich. MILLER: She learned to sign from-- - Pirates. - Pirates. Her and her species. But the men became-- What are you saying? What is this word? Aggressive? - Aggressive. - Fucking pirates. And the men stole her species from the sea generations ago. Thousands of girls who were born on land are walking around... with no idea that... their genes go back to this... ocean resident? Like a fish? I don't understand. I don't know what she's trying to say. Dr. Miller, I think she thinks she's a mermaid. Why is she, um... bipedal there, Dr. Stiff? She's saying it happens... when she's forced to dry land, or when her tail is removed from her body. They completely blend... into full humans. What is this? What are you saying? - [grunting] - What does this mean? You're dying. You're dying? Some who are like her can survive on land, but many don't. She says she's gonna die if she doesn't get back to the ocean soon. SANDRA: Okay, that's enough for tonight, ladies. Everybody to your sleeping quarters. Gonna give your medications there tonight. Come on, everybody up. We're done. Come on. That's enough for tonight. Time to go. I don't want any horsing around tonight either. Reyna, that means you too. Reyna! Fuck you, mermaid. Reyna! Sorry, Sandra! I'm ready for my antipsychotic now! Can I request that Dr. Miller... rectally administer the pill into me tonight? Reyna! Please, nurse? [laughs] I think I would be from mermaids. I don't know. I just think I'd be a mermaid. When I was a kid, my mom used to have to drag me kicking and screaming from the blow-up pool in the backyard. Therefore, you must be a mermaid. - Shut up, Edith Post. - Emily Post. All I'm saying is if one of us was a fucking mermaid and didn't know it, I'd be the fucking mermaid. You definitely smell like one. What do you think, June? Better yet, let's ask June's imaginary friend what she thinks about all this. Huh, June? Hmm. That's what I thought. How about you put this over your face so I can stop looking at it? [thunderclap] Put it over your head! Put it over your fucking head! [whimpering] You're so fucking useless. Are you happy, newbie? This is what happens when you turn this place into a house of lies. Mermaid, my ass. Why don't you go to hell, you little faker? I believe you. ALEX: I think I'm going start telling people I'm actually a mermaid princess, so I don't have to deal with reality either. [gasps] GHOST GIRL: I don't understand. Ugh! Fuck! [electricity crackling] GUARD: She chipped my tooth. Doc, doesn't this lead to the lower asylum? - I thought it was closed off. - It is. Now it isn't. This patient requires isolation. You're more than welcome to come down and help me or stay up here if you're afraid. Yeah. I can't go down there. Do you need me to help, or can you do this by yourself? Because I-- [sinister] Do you think it's right to put a girl down there in the dark? I mean, isn't that gonna be traumatic? Does it look like I have a PhD? I would have gone down there if I had a drink. I mean, all I need is one drink. Oh, definitely. Me too. If I had a margarita first, then no problem. [water dripping] [gas hissing] Goddamn it. Where do you think they took her? I don't know, but someone's gotta go look, bring back intel. Becky, don't say intel. It's irritating. You're gonna help her, aren't you? No, but you can, if you want. [panting] LINDA: I'll go find her. If anyone sees you after hours, you'll get quarantined, Linda. Kinda goes without saying, Charlotte. I told you not to give away our secret, tadpole. [suspense] [gasps] I-- The girls, they wanted me to-- Go ahead. She's right down there. Do you have an extension cord? [door closes] GHOST GIRL: Linda! Linda! We're in here! Linda! Linda, we're in here! Look at me! Look at me, Linda! We're in here! You looked right at me. [screams] Please stop! [grunts] [labored breathing] I can't-- I can't see. What am I sitting on? What-- [panting] [growling] Okay, give me a wall. Where's the wall? Come on, where's the fucking-- [growling] [growling] Who's gonna get a new squeaky toy tomorrow? [distant screaming] Too scary. Too scary. Can't breathe. Turn-- Turn the lights, please! I don't like the dark. June kept the room lit up all night, so I wouldn't be scared. You're not making any sense. I think it's bioluminescence. Like the deep sea fish with the little light in front of their sharp teeth that attracts little fishies to them, lures smaller fish to her, so she can eat them. June, in the living room. Have you seen Linda and the new girl? No, ask her. BEYER: You're a goddamn survivor. ["Theme from Bonanza"] [continues] [giggling] That's cool. [grunting] Are you understanding this? [TV playing] Don't tell anyone I do this. It doesn't look good. Secret smoker. - Told ya. - What? - We're not talking to you. - What? I'm not talking to you. I'm telling you something's wrong. BEYER: Test for acuity. - Eye test? Come on. - Please, Margaret. Step back, Miller. Don't help her. [snap] [grunts] I ordered this for Linda. Jesus. Oh, this is very inappropriate. I didn't realize how kinky this was. Don't wear this in front of security. Hey, have you seen the new girl? You lost her? [chuckles] Yeah, kind of. A little bit. She just sort of wandered off. Are you smoking in here? - I've been smoking like a fish. - Like a chimney. What did I say? Anyway, if you see her on the monitor, let me know. I stopped looking at it when you covered it with your grandma sweater. Okay, if you could take a peek at it and see if you see her. There's a ton of blind spots on these monitors. I know that. There you are, little slippery one. Come on. Hey, guys, she's pointing at something. I think it's Charlotte's book. [laughing] Oh, no. Charlotte's been reading the same trashy novel for about two years now. I would not expect to borrow it. [dog barking] [engine revs] Whoa. What is new girl wearing? [laughing] [thud] [brisk] [phone ringing] I can get that at the nurses' station. I was just using the potty. - [continues] - [Reyna howling] I hear water! - I hear the water! - I hear it too! It's the river! Holy shit. It's beautiful! How much of this do you think is sewage runoff? [howling] Look at Becky! Just go in your underwear like it's a bathing suit. No. I'm going butt naked, tight ass. I wasn't talking to you. Care for a moonlight swim, girls? REBECCA: Cold! How are you not cold? [laughing] REYNA: 'Cause I'm a mermaid, bitch! Oh, fuck me! No. This smells like sewage. [laughing] BEYER: How are the girls? Good, yeah, except for Linda not having a proper sendoff. Linda's in a perfectly nice place now. I don't know why you won't let me know where she is, so I can get ahold-- It's not professional to keep in touch with your ex-patients, Sandra. Excellent work today with the new girl. Standing and walking? BOTH: Amazing progress. SANDRA: Jinx! Forgot how hungry being in the water makes you. I'm hungry too. And I'm fucking cold. I'm cold too. [grand] Where's Coffee? Probably just-- No, he's probably taking a massive Jack Palance-size dump. Have you noticed that every time that man is here, every time he works, our pipes are backed up? I mean, every single time. What are you doing with a Taser? Fuck it, I'm going back. Whoa, Becky, we came this far! And how much further before we know what to do, Reyna? Guys, the fact that we escaped without the guards seeing us on camera is a gift. This is a miracle! And if we don't go back, then what? There's spiders and shit out here. I'm going back. Reyna, your meds. How can you leave-- Fuck off, Charlotte. Fuck you too, weirdo! [owl hooting] Gonna catch pneumonia, retard. - [gasps] - [grand] REYNA: Hello? New girl! Hey! New girl! Or whatever the hell your name is. Hey! She went back to the home? I feel drizzle! Just left me here to fend for myself against... [gasps] ...lizards and critters and grizzlies. Fine. Now I have to go back. [tense] GHOST GIRL: What about you, Reyna? Left without saying goodbye. Complaining about bugs in the wilderness. [scoffs] I got a bug for ya. Bend over. I'll pull it out of your-- [dramatic] Jesus, babe. I don't think you're gonna fit in the wheelchair anymore. I'm sorry. I didn't realize the river dried up. We're gonna have to get more wheelchairs and use the roads. I'll push you all the way to the ocean if I have to. Chlorine! That's why your tail didn't grow back in the pool. Chlorine. SANDRA: Reyna said the doctoral trainees always leave. They'll never be able to form lasting bonds like this. BEYER: God, do you ever clean these windows? SANDRA: I don't wanna hurt them. Don't smoke in my car. [tires screeching] Don't think. Just help! [panting] [gasps] [ratcheting] [grunts] I wouldn't do that if I were you. I'm just gonna administer a sedative. Hey! We are not the family fucking dog that you can just lock in a room when guests are over! Will you please stop drilling? Hey, it's your own fault. You broke the window, you lose window privileges. - [drilling] - What the fuck is going on, JM? I don't know. My shift just started. I-I don't know. All I know is, something about the new girl. [drilling continues] [gasping] [grunting] They're hurting her! Sandra, tell them to stop hurting her! My neck. I can't feel my neck. I think it's broken. Margaret, I'm holding up my hand, Look at my hand. Look at my hand. Shh. Please, just find my glasses, so I can keep looking at the mermaid. [whirring] Charlotte, can you move? I have one more board, then I'm done. Hey, Doc's leaving. Hey, guys. [screaming] - Oh, my God! - [screaming continues] James Michael, keep boarding up that window. Get that other board up right now. Shh. Shh. Not a sound. Not a sound. He's not going to let anyone walk out of here alive. It's the only way he can keep her. [doorknob rattling] [rattling continues] SANDRA: That's a steel-lined door. He is not getting through. [banging] Everyone stay quiet. [banging continues] [banging continues] Shh. London, shh. Quiet. He's getting keys for the bedrooms. All together. That's right. Huddle in. Hide and seek. Hide and seek. Hide and seek. All I've done is move them to a different room. How do I protect them? Oh, dear. [creaking] Only good for one shot before you jam up. Goddamn it. I gotta pee. I can't hold it. Think I can just run in and use it really fast? I'm just gonna go. I really have to pee. [whimpering] - [gunfire continues] - [screaming] [smoke alarm beeping] Gotta pee. Move, move, move. [music box] - [click] - [gasps] [sighs] Guardian angel... watching over me. ["Ave Maria"] My-- My mom... watching over me. [clank] Nice shooting, Tex. You missed your target by an inch, asshole. Thank you, Mama. You're protecting me. You're really watching me. You're really watching over me. Protecting-- [electricity crackling] [distant screaming] Alex! Let me go, goddamn it! Let me go! [distant sirens blaring] I'm not gonna leave you. [engine starts] [chatter on radio] [hissing] [tires screech] Ink. [electricity crackling] [grunting] [squealing] [screams] I can't walk through! Sorry you're feeling so sick. You look like hell. You want some cough syrup? Fucking June. I can't. [tense] They'll be coming for me. My life is over because of you, so I'm gonna do what I've been dying to do since first I laid eyes on your unmitigated beauty. My dear sweet case study. You're going to be the most interesting patient to look at underneath that straightjacket, underneath those scales. [panting] Let's cut you open and see your inside parts. Your fish parts. Okay? Girls, you stay in this car. I know I'm gonna find my goldfish in your stomach. But don't worry. I'm gonna sew you back up with a train track of stitches. [buzzing] - [electricity crackling] - [squealing] You know what they call a good woman up here on dry land? A catch. [grunting] He's not here. He's not here. I lost her. [thunderclap] Oh, God. [grunts] [distant squealing] [metal creaking] [groans] [tuning] [gears grinding] [thunder rumbling] [screams] What's your diagnosis? [gunshot] Open the door! Open the door, guys! Sandra's out there! We have to help her! Go, go, go! [thunderclap] BEYER: You shot me in the hand, you bitch! [tense] [snarling] [wood cracking] [crash] [Beyer gagging] [gagging continues] [Beyer groans] [grunting] [screams] Oh, my God! I told you to stay in the car! Help me! [dramatic] LONDON: I can't open it. Damn door's jammed! I can't get it open 'cause the door's jammed. I can't! Uh, guys, I need to tell you all something really important now. Now's not exactly the time to tell us your true feelings. We're sinking. My friend says Doc seals the corpses up in the walls. Now's not the time to do the imaginary friend thing, June. Rip open that wall before the boat sinks. [screaming] Maybe we can swim through the hole in the bottom? Swim out? - I can't swim. - Neither can I. Becks, get your lighter out of your pocket before it gets wet. Little nervous here. Just a little nervous about the drowning. SANDRA: I saw an emergency kit strapped to the ceiling. There should be some flares in there, if I can find it. Rebecca, give me your lighter, so we can find it. - No! - Oh, God. [screaming] [yelling] Doc got her! No! [yelling] [hull creaking] Oh, fuck me. [screams] [gasping] [flare hissing] Oh, God, here we go! Oh, my God. [bones crack] Oh, my God! [gasping] Get in here! Keep your heads up! Keep your heads up! [hull creaking] [gasping] [screaming] Keep your heads above! Keep your heads up! Look out for her tail! She's hitting the roof! Oh, God. Becky! Oh, Becky, no. Reyna, she's with her brother. I can see her! She's standing with her twin! [Reyna crying] Becky! I love you. Wake up. [sobbing] [somber] [triumphant] [gentle] I don't understand. She's saying thank you. How do you know? Wait! You said before that there's girls walking around who don't know that they're like you. Are any of us? Are any of us? [music swells] I'm sorry. I still don't know what that means. She's saying, "I feel you." She's saying, "I'll always feel you." I'm not going anywhere. [gagging] [coughs] [yelps] |
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