Mio figlio Nerone (1956)

He thought I wouldn't find him here.
But what force on earth could
separate a mother from her son?
Imagined what it is to be mother of Nero.
The same thing happens every time:
The moment when Rome is in a crisis,
the emperor retreats to the seaside.
Nero... Nobody knows him better than I.
I know what goes on in that villa of his...
...where he is working on "state affairs".
Here come the heroic Roman legions...
Sleeping with the rabble, playing dice...
Instead of defending the borders...
...they use their spears to catch fish.
My son wasn't always like that.
But he got under a bad influence.
That is why I have prepared a surprise...
Agrippina. Help, Agrippina is coming!
Agrippina is here! Help!
Halt.
Present arms! Attention!
- You cannot enter.
- Is that so?
Evidently the young centurion
does not know who I am.
You are Augusta Agrippina, the mother of Nero.
- And I should not be allowed to enter?
- You wear a purple shawl.
Yes, it is purple.
Nero has forbidden anyone
to wear the royal colour.
A button is missing. It's a disgrace.
And you are impertinent.
Think about your career.
Do you have a mother?
- Yes, in Padua.
- Then stand back if you want to see her again.
Germans, don't camp too near to the villa...
... otherwise my son might think
that I am trying to force him.
- Is it safe for you to enter alone?
- Oh, I will not go alone.
- My secret weapon.
- A mongoose. A snake killer.
Yes, I always keep it with me these days.
- You will also find Seneca on your path.
- I know.
You disgust my feet, you disgust my hands.
You make me wish I was a hunchback...
... You make me loose all my teeth.
This is how the coward fears death.
But philosophers, like me, regard
death only as a supreme enjoyment.
- It is Agrippina.
- Agrippina! - Yes.
- Impossible! It is not a hallucination?
- No. She must have bitten the snake first.
Oh, my dear Agrippina.
What a pleasant surprise!
- You look as young and beautiful as ever.
- Who did it, you or Nero?
How can you say such a thing...
about your son and your dearest friend?
- You gave orders to keep me out.
- Why would I do such a thing?
- It's a strange misunderstanding.
- You are always welcome here.
- Do you intend to stay here?
- It depends. How is my son? - Very well.
With my guidance, he is becoming
a real man: Serious and devoted...
- What is this nonsense?
- Experiments of Nero.
- He wants to have our ships towed by fish?
- Yes.
He has surrounded himself
with students to work it out.
Find Aniceto! Drunk or sober,
dead or alive, bring him here.
- Who are all these people? -
- His fellow students.
They are all friends of Nero:
Architects, scholars, poets...
- All people with creative genius.
- Creative? What have they created so far?
What is this, a poet?
He is a general. That one is a senator.
Nero chooses them with great care.
She is the daughter of a praetor,
she is the wife of a consul...
- What is this? - It is a finger.
- What! - Yes, a finger.
It is the finger of Ennius Silanus.
- He used to wag his finger under
the nose when he speaks. - He does.
- And so Nero...
- Nero had it cut off.
- Have you seen Aniceto? - No.
- Find him. The emperor needs him right away.
- And where is Nero right now?
- He is in a meeting.
An important conference with the senators.
- In its study?
- Yes. Important state affairs.
He is not to be disturbed.
I am good. They all know that I am good.
(angry) You are here because I want you!
(angry)
You are distracted. You are so distracted today!
How can I compose the melody
of the forest if you can't keep time?
It's an easy rhythm. Pay attention.
Again, from the beginning.
(Nero sings)
(the animals make noise)
Who couldn't keep the tempo, you?
Yes. You are useless.
I had my doubts about you from the start...
I wanted to make you a senator. Instead,
you are an owl, and will always be an owl.
From here, the pig can take over.
- But what are you doing? Pig, are you asleep?
- Enough!
Poppea, I do not understand you.
What do you want?
You keep on torturing those
animals, it is too cruel.
It is cruel if artists study long and hard?
Is that what you say?
It is good enough. You should get some sleep.
I can't, I must learn the song
before the morning is over. You sleep!
I cannot sleep with this stink!
It smells like a stable in here.
- And when I fall asleep, the pig and the
owl wake me up. - Darling, don't make a fuss!
Not in front of the artists!
- But why didn't you tell me she was alive?
- I couldn't get away from her.
- She almost had me killed.
- Nero will kill me. How can I tell him?
- Are you not his executioner?
- I am an officer of the Navy.
I only kill because I have to think of my family.
I must try to find Nero in the villa.
Once more, with feeling.
Pig, goat, owl... owl, watch the tempo!
(Nero sings)
- Nero! Nero!
- What do you want? Do not disturb me!
- Your mother has arrived.
- Yes, in the underworld! - No, she is here!
- She is there, waiting for you.
- She is alive. Are you sure?
- Yes. She wants to come here, but Seneca is
stalling her. - Hide the animals!
- Poppea, you hide too. - Why, what happened?
- My mother is coming. Go away, quickly.
- You leave with all the animals!
- I am not an animal!
- No time to argue! Move, get outside.
- No. I want to meet your mother.
You are crazy? She won't like it!
- The emperor of Rome is afraid of his own mother!!
- There is no time to loose!
Every time your mother
visits you force me to hide.
- Enough!
- Last time you locked me in the cellar.
- Leave! Go to your room. - The father of
the nation, trembling before his mother!
Do not provoke me! My mother
is here! Go away now!
My mother is coming, go!
Seneca, stop your silly excuses, I am loosing
my patience. I want to speak to my son.
Agrippina, are you doubting my sincerity?
Is doubt corrupting our deep, sacred friendship...
- Where did she go? - Who?
- Agrippina. - Agrippina!
(worried) Agrippina?
Agrippina has arrived! Run away!
Agrippina is here!
Ah! The senators, the meeting...
- Nero! Nero, my dear!
- Mother, what a great surprise. How you are?
You have put on weight.
Oh, your eyes are bloodshot.
Let me see your tongue.
Oh, and I see you have grown a beard!
Do you like it?
It makes me look like my grandfather!
The senators use perfume, eh?
Where is that woman?
Which woman? There is only me here.
Is that not enough for you?
- I believe she is called Poppea?
- Who is that? I do not know her.
- See if you know these...
- Vipers! Mama, help!
- Where did you find them?
- Where I always find them, in my bed. Three!
- How terrible! I'm so glad you
discovered them in time. - Yes.
- I also found the slave that planted them.
- Did you have him killed?
No, I tortured him, until he confessed
that you had ordered him to do it.
- I know nothing about it, mother.
- You come here. Nero!
You come here. Nero!
Look at me. Straight in the eyes.
Nero, watches to me in the eyes. In the eyes.
- It was a joke, mama.
- Such a fine joke.
You must stop putting snakes in my bed!
But what are you doing here?
Agrippina could see you! Disappear!
- I don't want to stay in my room anymore.
- Go, go!
If you want me to hide, I will hide in the bed.
What is wrong, mother?
For 50 years not one member
of our family died of a natural cause.
- Yes, they all had accidents.
- Yes, "accidents".
My father, Germanicus, was
killed by his grandfather Tiberius.
- Tiberius was choked in his sleep by Caligula.
- Good old uncle Caligula!
Caius and Postumus were killed
by their grandmother...
... and my sister Drusilla
was killed by uncle Caligula.
What a man!
Your father Claudius was the only
one who died a natural death.
And only because I protected him.
- Mother, you forget he was poisoned.
- What did you say?
- Mama, everyone knows that you
poisoned him. - That is a lie!
Mother, don't you remember?
I saw you preparing the mushrooms.
If you repeat those lies, you
won't get the gift that I brought you.
A present? What kind of
present? Let me see!
Not while you are dressed like this.
Change into something suitable my dear.
- Where is the bag? - The bag?
- Yes. - Here it is, mother.
Vipers! By Jove!
- I knew I would find you here!
- I couldn't help hearing it all.
- Nero, why did you put snakes in the bed?
- For the good of the people.
She wanted me to raise the taxes!
It's shocking. And this makes a son
place vipers in the bed of his mother?
- Well, yes. - What if it had bitten?
- What? - Who would have been guilty?
- The snake.
- No, my beloved disciple.
Remembered that I am your teacher.
I would have been to blame.
I do not want to be remembered as the one,
...who taught to sons to put
vipers in the beds of mothers.
Remember, the mother will
always be the mother.
- But Seneca, wasn't it YOU who
suggested the snakes? - No!
This is what I said:
"If some day a slave puts a
viper in the bed of Agrippina..."
"...nobody would suspect you".
- That's what I did, I sent a slave.
- Deaf-mute?
- Why deaf-mute? - A deaf-mute does
not speak, even speak under torture.
Brilliant! I could hit myself.
Why did I not think of this before?
- What are you doing? - We are laying
water pipes. - Did Nero order it?
- Yes, it is for the aquatic theatre.
- What have I done to deserve this?
- We can all live in harmony.
- Under the same roof? - Yes.
For me and your mother, it's impossible.
We have very different political ideas.
- Who cares about politics!
- Nero! - What "Nero"!
I have better things to do
than politics: I must sing.
A noble vocation you cannot refuse.
But do not say that me and your
mother, two complete opposites...
...when it comes to politics,
religion, ethics, aesthetics...
...can ever reach an agreement?
But you've tried to teach me
that good can come from evil.
- From death... - is born life.
- And from hate... - Love is born.
If you and my mother hate each other,
we should make love spring from hate.
- What would you say to a wedding?
- A wedding?
A wedding between you and Poppea.
Seneca, you fool! I have found a way
to bring you and my mother together.
Seneca, I order you to marry
my mother immediately.
Come on!
Stay with me!
(whistles)
- Where? What happened?
- Seneca, you will marry my mother.
Oh, how can you be so cruel?
- You've taught me, that in life
we must suffer. - I'd rather die.
- You prefer death to my mother!
- Yes.
- You dare to refuse me? - Yes.
- I order you to leave this house.
- Thank you, Nero. - I knew it.
For a long time I wanted to go
to Gaeta, in my country house.
To eat only bread and olives, and
meditate about the futility of life.
- I understand. - You go to your mother.
Yes. She brought me a present.
Leave, you ungrateful old man!
Go, I never want to see you again.
I will remain here with my mother!
- If you need me, I will be in Gaeta.
- What?
If you need me, I will be in Gaeta.
(Nero whines)
- Caesar, here is your new dress.
- Take it away, I don't want to see it...
It is a beautiful new dress!
Beautiful! Slaves, dress me up, I'll
see my mother. She brought me a gift.
- Do you like men?
- Naturally!
# One, two, three, what a nice thing!
One, two, three, the king does sing. #
- Aniceto, are these slaves all deaf-mute?
- Yes.
- Seneca told me deaf and mute.
- They are, all of them.
Mercy, Cesar!
Deaf-mute, eh? Tonight I want
all of them to be deaf and mute.
- But I am not a surgeon.
- You are now. Do your duty.
- Simply cut off the tongue and tap
the eardrums with a hammer. - No!
A fraud! Shame! Take him away!
- What are you doing?
- Just discussing some tongue surgery.
- Listen. I am not your fiancee?
- Of course you are.
- Why are you dressed like this?
- Because you made me hide from your mother!
Yes, what can I do while she is here?
She must not find out we are engaged.
What are you doing? This is private. Get out!
- You promised to marry me. Have you forgotten?
- Of course not.
It's not that I don't want to marry you.
But what can I do when my mother is here?
- Wait, I have an idea. - Yes? - Yes.
- To remove all suspicion, you will marry him.
- You are crazy? - Not at all.
- No! No! No! - Did you hear?
You are going to marry Poppea.
- But I am already married.
- I said Poppea!
- But my wife? - No, please not!
- We feed her to the lions.
- You are a monster!
- Poppea...
- Mother? - Close your eyes.
- Where is the present you brought me?
- I have a wonderful surprise for you.
- It's beautiful? - You can't imagine!
- Where are you taking me, mother?
Where are we going? - Here.
- Hey... What is this?
- The armour of your grandfather Germanicus.
He wore it in 100 glorious battles.
Now it is yours. It's all for you.
- For me? But why? Where would I wear it?
- In the battles.
Battles? But we have peace.
Germanicus has already conquered the Huns.
- There is still half of Britain to occupy.
- The situation there is serious.
Listen to what general Corbulone has to say.
Over 2000 soldiers died in the last battle.
- Corbulone, how many battles have you fought?
- 45, and with honour.
- How come you're still alive? - Nero!
- Mother, don't interrupt.
Evidently I have been fortunate!
- Corbulone, can you make me a promise?
- Yes, certainly, Cesar.
- In the next battle, try to die as well.
- If it's possible, I will. - Bravo.
It will make the soldiers very happy,
if the generals die alongside with them.
Natrlich!
Who is this? Mother!
- What is he?
- It is Segimerus, the German general.
- You brought a German into my house?
- He has planned the entire operation.
Operation? What do you
mean? Explain it to me.
This is the North of Britain,
a land covered in snow and ice.
With four legions and a manoeuvre,
we can conquer it without casualties.
- Yes? - Certainly. - Certainly.
- Where do I fit in? - What?
This is your chance. Britain awaits you.
- Britain waits? - It waits for you.
Let it wait. I do not care to see it.
It's cold, and I have a delicate chest.
- I'm sorry, mama.
- Don't exaggerate, Nero. Your health is fine.
- Now listen to Segimerus.
- Mama, why do I have to go to Britain? - Shhh.
- Alright, we listen to Segimerus.
- Ze plan is simpel.
We head for the mountains,
and set the forests on fire...
...we burn their grain, sink their ships,
and destroy the ports and warehouses.
- Look! The horn.
- Shhh. Don't touch it.
- If I ask, will he give it to me?
- No. And don't steal it.
The horn is such a beautiful instrument.
BAOOOT!
We wipe out the savages, alles kaputt.
- You are here to send me into a war?
- Yes. - Like a soldier? - Certainly.
Agrippina spoils all the fun.
Yes... Goodbye orgies!
Grandfather, please understand, I am
not a warrior like you. I am an artist.
As an artist I have a strategic
program to conquer the world.
To conquer the world? Oh, Nero!
I've waited so long to hear you say that!
- I'm so proud of you. We are
listening. Explain. - Thanks.
- Our soldiers are all in Britain? - Yes.
- Well, I will withdraw all of them.
- Impossible!
- Hush, this is strategy.
You understand me, mother...I withdraw them all,
and then I will transform them into stonemasons.
The soldiers change in masons!
Oh, you are joking!
- Come on, be seriously. - But I AM serious.
I transform them in masons, so they can
construct theatres all over the empire...
...and then I will sing in all of them.
- The emperor sings in public??
- Yes. Seneca told me I have a beautiful voice.
I have prepared a magnificent show.
If it is a success, I will go on tour,
and perform all over the empire.
I do not need an army, mama, when
I can conquer the world with my voice.
And while play the clown for everyone to laugh at...
... who will look after the affairs of Rome?
The senators will take care of that.
And then, there is Seneca.
Seneca...
- Cesar, the rehearsals have started.
- Yes, Aniceto, I'll be there.
Ah, Corbulone, come here.
- You two see to it that the armour is returned.
- The armour? - Yes.
I will give the armour to the dancers.
And I will form an army of dancers.
With my ballerinas I will conquer Britain.
Just imagine the Britons when
they an army of dancers arrive!
- How could they do anything but surrender?
- I would have to command an army of dancers?
I know I can trust you, Corbulone.
Caesar, I refuse.
Corbulone, you mean you prefer
the soldiers to the dancers?
Aniceto, I will never understand
these generals. Do you?
- Hail, Caesar Augustus.
- But friends, suppose I do not want to sing?
- Oh no, please, sing for us.
- And if I refuse?
No, sing, please.
- I will not sing.
- But Caesar, why not?
I enjoy tormenting them a little bit.
- Friends, I will sing.
- Caesar was only joking.
(satisfied sounds)
- Aniceto, tell them to be quiet!
- Shh! Silence.
Such a great sense of humour.
Isn't she the girl whose husband we killed?
She likes my jokes.
Friends, the show will go on.
But I will take part not as your
emperor, but as a humble singer.
(satisfied sounds)
- The canary of Rome!
- What?
- The canary of Rome!
- You are quite right.
- I am Pison. - What did you say?
- Pison the architect. Remember: Pison.
- I will design your theatres.
- And I will construct them, all in marble.
Bravo! Build me theatres all over the empire.
Remember: Pison.
The contract is ours!
- But who is that? - It is Seneca.
- Seneca! Where is he going?
Seneca!
- Stop! Seneca, where are you going?
- I am leaving.
You can't. Don't you want to hear me sing?
And my mother wants to send me into a war.
- That was her surprise? - Yes.
- It's your own doing. - Seneca, stay.
- For the good of the Roman people. - So?
- I will give you a villa.
- I will sacrifice myself once more.
- We will stop the war. A villa by the sea?
- In the country. - That will do.
Seneca, I knew you wouldn't desert me.
Now, what can you do about my mother?
Squadron! Halt!
- Are they the recruits of my new army?
- Yes. - Ballerinas? - Not exactly...
- What are they? - All volunteers. - Good.
We do not need soldiers to conquer Britain.
You girls will be enough, armed with your, your...
- Where are you from?
- They are from Ferrara, Caesar.
Have they tried the armour yet?
- He would look good in grandfather's armour.
- In your grandfather's armour?
Aniceto, do what I tell you.
Make her march, I want to see her march.
Forward, march! One, two, one, two.
About-face... One, two, one, two...
Enough. Good.
Grandfather's armour, Aniceto.
Attention!
- Finally, I've been waiting for you.
- You are still here? What about Agrippina!
- I must speak to him. - Me too.
- This is not the time.
Haven't you heard what he said?
I have to marry Aniceto, the executioner.
- Congratulations.
- I have been Nero's fiancee for 2 years.
I divorced 2 husbands to become empress.
And now, because his mother arrives,
I should marry a common executioner?
You are lucky. I may have to marry his mother!
- Oh, is the mother disturbing you?
- The mother will always be the mother.
- Agrippina, have you met Poppea Sabina?
- I have heard about her.
- I heard she was married.
- she's divorced, but with a new fiancee.
- How nice. With whom?
- With me.
How very strange. In Rome they all
say that you are Nero's mistress.
Nero's mistress!
Isn't that a funny idea, Poppea?
I don't think it is funny at all.
The moment has come to speak now.
Tell her? Tell her what, my darling?
There's no need to worry her with gossip.
Go now, darling. Go now.
I never doubted your love.
Ah, my dear senators.
What can I do for you?
We have come from Rome,
with new laws to study.
No, you study them.
That's what the senate is for.
And then if your laws
please me, I will sign them.
- By the way, do you know how to sing?
- To sing?! - Yes, to sing. - No, but...
(Nero sings)
Come on.
(the senators sing)
Not bad... Tomorrow we sing again.
First, rehearse. But first, a bath.
Who are all these people?
They are from the village.
Agrippina invited them for the show.
Idiot! This is the worst
thing that could happen.
- That woman is a demon.
- What do we do now?
Listen. As soon as the people enter...
Long live Nero, the father of the land!
- Caesar! - The peasants have invaded the villa.
- What! The peasants? - Yes.
Your mother has invited them to judge your show.
Wonderful! The people will be judges of my art!
- She will join them. - Who?
- Augusta. - My mother? - Yes.
Alceo, this may be the best day of my life...
What are you doing? Go, go!
Mother! Ah!
- I hope you'll enjoy Nero's performance.
- It will be unforgettable, I am certain.
(inaudible)
And now... Nero Caesar Augustus!
(applause)
On the stage.
(wonder)
(bugle)
# Tremble, mothers and senators #
# It is Nero, best of emperors #
# The great singer! #
# Tremble before me, people! #
- Normally he sings even better.
- No doubt.
There will be much applause.
# But someone is still
stronger then Nero... #
# - Who is it? - Who is it?
- Who will it be? #
# Who will it be? #
She is the mother.
# Mother... Mother... #
As soon as it's over, everyone will boo.
These are the orders of Agrippina.
- And then what will happen to us?
- While Agrippina is alive, you will be safe.
- Order from Seneca: everyone will
cheer, or else! - Stay calm.
(Nero sings)
When it stops, start booing.
(Nero sings)
Canary! Canary of Rome!
If he had won a battle, would he
have gotten half as much applause?
Crown him quickly, before it is too late.
- They cannot boo, the pretorians prevented it.
- Do you want me to call the Germans?
Thank you, thank you for your approval.
But I have not yet deserved this crown.
I consider your applause
as a great encouragement.
It demonstrates how much
my song delights you.
As a token of my appreciation, I will
sing my song for you again, 823 times.
- What did he say? 23?
- No, 823. - Oh...
- And they say that he is not generous.
- Yes, it is such a beautiful surprise.
Block the doors while Nero
sings. Nobody can leave.
- And if someone becomes unwell?
- He can exit after the final applause.
(twang)
# Mother! Mother! #
# I know what you want me to do! #
# the armour of my grandfather... #
#... I will not wear... #
# You want to know why?
# It appeals to you, but not to me. #
# This story knows how it will end. #
(laughs)
"Quo vadis, mama"!
- It's horrible. - Keep quiet!
- No! I am a veteran soldier.
- I have fought for 20 years in Germany.
- So did I.
- These veterans annoy me. Where is Aniceto?
- He was here, but then he disappeared.
(Nero sings)
Dog! Stop! Dog!
Enough, go away! Enough!
(discord)
- They boo. - They boo.
- They boo. - They boo.
- They boo?
- They do.
(twang)
(anger)
Seneca, I'm sorry, it seems the people
do not share your opinion about music.
And the opinion of the people counts.
The songs of Nero are just too refined
for the vulgar taste of these peasants.
There is nothing for it. We must send him
to Britain, and forget this ever happened.
We can leave tomorrow morning.
Nice work, Seneca. My compliments.
Just how are you going to get the situation
under control? What arguments do you have?
The only person who can convince Nero tonight...
... is you, my dear.
- Me? - Certainly. Can you sing?
- Why? - We must give Nero new
confidence in his voice.
(Poppea sings)
- Poppea, you are singing my song!
You have learned it? - Naturally.
- Do you like it? - It is wonderful.
If you hear it once, you can't forget it anymore.
- But why do the people boo to me? Don't
they understand? - But I understand you.
- Isn't that enough?
- Yes, Poppea, you must never abandon me.
You will never abandon me, right?
Never, Poppea, never, never, never!
Never.
(Nero cries)
They have been watering the milk again?
Does Poppea know about this?
Filthy slaves! Water in the milk!
Dirty slaves!
Poppea, let me see your skin.
Your skin is ruined.
They have mixed the milk with water.
Poppea, you seem to shine...
Lovely Poppea, marry me.
Oh, Nero, I was hoping you would say that!
We must leave, before they change your mind.
We can escape so somewhere far away.
- Yes. far away. To Egypt. Do you like that?
- Yes. In Egypt with you! It's like a dream!
We will see the mysterious pyramids,
and all the palaces of the Pharaohs.
- I will sleep in the bed of Cleopatra...
- No, Cleopatra no!
I will be empress! How marvellous!
- It's marvellous to see you dance, Poppea.
- I will dance for you.
I will dance for you now.
No, not like that. Almost nude. Here. Put this on.
Tonight has been a great triumph.
The emperor is in your hands, Agrippina.
Not completely. It's too early to claim the victory.
- We can't win as long as Poppea and Seneca are alive.
- What can we do to help?
Nothing, I will take care of it this evening.
- Come here. Beautiful! - Even in rags?
- Yes, you must dress this way.
We will live as beggars. Charming!
It seems Egypt is full of beggars.
You and I, living with the beggars.
Alm for a poor beggar, give us alms.
What a fantasy!
Poppea, it's not a joke.
You said that you would never leave me.
I have always wanted to live like a poor artist.
- Is that for you?
- You're joking. You want to abandon the throne?
Yes, why not? It is MY throne. Not yours.
I have renounced 2 husbands,
and I've risked my reputation.
I've risked my life to become empress,
and now you want me to become a beggar?
You are crazy!
I will go alone! I forsake
the throne. I am an artist!
You, an artist?
Do you know what your singing sounds like?
- Like a... - Like a nightingale.
- Yes? - Like a nightingale. I have proof.
- Who is this?
- One of the people who hissed at your show. - Dog!
Mercy, Caesar. You song was beautiful.
- Then why did you hiss?
- Mercy, I was protecting my family.
- How so? Tell me.
- He was paid to hiss at you. - By who?
- Crepereius, by order of your mother.
- You stinking liar!
- My mother paid you?
- She has paid the people for hissing.
Oh Caesar, you sing very well,
your songs are a phenomenon.
Seneca...
My mother paid the people to do it!
- The gods have decided to make me an orphan!
- Nero.
What you want?
Nero! Nero!
Mushrooms. Venom of cobra. Wolfbane.
Tail of a lizard. Toadstools.
Quiet, quiet. A little bit more...
- Nero!
- Quiet, Seneca, I am busy.
- This is a powerful poison.
- Are you sure the recipe is right?
- Nero!
- Quiet, Seneca.
- Mama is strong. All the family is.
- I have experimented on a general.
- Nero!
- Yes? Let me be, Seneca.
- Hey! - Who is it?
- It's you. You frightened me.
- I found the arsenic. - Calm!
- Good. It must be a surprise...
- Put in some more arsenic.
- It's my mother, you keep out of this.
- Nero, I do not know what you are making.
- If it is poison, I ask you never to use
it against your mother! - What nonsense!
Nothing, no reason, can justify such an act.
Nero! Remembered: The mother is always the mother.
Seneca is right. I won't do it. Take it away!
- No poison? - No.
But you are young, and may ignore my good advice.
- So unfortunately, you will go ahead and do it.
- I will? - Yes, regrettably.
As your teacher, allow me to give you some advice.
- Are you boiling the concoction?
- Shouldn't I? - No, that cancels the effect.
Right again, Seneca. Look, it is clear now.
- Shake it well. - What? - Shake it.
- Is it strong enough?
- It will be fine.
Don't worry. It is an old family recipe.
Look at the snake, it's asleep.
- Tonight it will sleep even better, in a bed.
- Whose bed? - Poppea's.
You will put it there tonight.
I will give Seneca his lemonade.
Let's go.
By Jove! What are you doing! Are you scared?
Look! Look! A German!
Get him!
- You murderer!
- Help, help me!
- Is it safe now? - Yes.
- Aniceto, have you got a good grip on him?
- Yes. - Sure? - Yes!
You German spy, we'll cut off your ears!
Mercy! Caesar, I am a only a worker of Pozzuoli.
What are you doing at the bed of my mother?
- I am one of the plumbers working in the villa.
- Yes sire.
We are only fixing the water pipes.
They leak on the bed of your mother.
- And this?
- It's a marble ornament from the ceiling.
Unfortunately, we have no cement to put it back.
So we will secure it with iron bars.
It is safe as long as nobody comes near it...
Or else it will fall on the bed of your mother.
If someone touches it, it will falls down?
- If the slab is touched...
- Then it comes down? - It falls on the bed.
- I knew I'd find you here, Seneca.
- What kind of evil device is this?
- Why? - Are you sure it will work? - Oh yes!
It will come crashing down on the bed.
They need 5 more minutes to make it so.
There she is, she is coming this way.
You keep her busy, Seneca, 5 minutes.
Are you still here? Won't
Poppea be waiting for you?
Poppea is only my fiancee.
A philosopher ought to be in bed by now.
- Agrippina? - Yes?
- You underestimate your son's talent.
- The people have decided, there's nothing I can do.
- Agrippina!
- What's wrong?
- A headache. My head is spinning.
- Have you drunk anything?
- No. It must be my asthma.
Well then, the remedy is simple.
You must drink a glass of lemonade.
- Is there any in your room? - I think so.
- I'll take you there. - Thanks, Agrippina.
Up you go! Up you go!
Here, take this. Drink it all at once.
And it will solve all your problems...
Thanks. No, thanks, it's no use.
- For a philosopher the only remedy is... death.
- Philosophers!
What good is it always to think of dying?
A very great advantage, Agrippina,
it prevents any suffering in death.
Do as you will, but if the pain returns...
No! No, Agrippina, do not go away.
Agrippina! Do not leave me here alone.
- But what do you want?
- It wasn't asthma, it wasn't true.
Seneca, I am beginning to think that
your philosophy has driven you crazy.
- Stop it! You are wasting my time.
- Don't reject me like that!
- Do not crush the dream I have.
- what dream?
A dream that has been in my heart for 25 years,
and that I have never dared to confess.
I... I love you, Agrippina.
But you told me that you will marry Poppea.
Poppea is just a distraction.
Can an unripe fruit like her,
ever seduce a man of my taste?
I want to taste the sweetness of mature fruit.
Poppea is like ice and you are like fire.
Poppea is a stream and you are an impetuous river.
Oh, how I wish to drown myself in that river!
Do not resist me, Agrippina! Don't resist me!
Who is resisting? Your river is waiting for you.
Ready to sweep you away... we wasted 20 years.
- No more idle words. Do it quickly, Seneca.
- It would be beautiful, but it's late now.
What are you saying?
It is never too late for love.
It is nearly 4, I can no longer stay up!
- Then lie down.
- Every man's energy has limits.
Your passion is all smoke and no fire.
All of it, only words.
Yes, my dear, words. That's right. Words.
I feel sorry for Poppea if she marries you.
There is no man behind that grey beard!
- Don't exaggerate, Agrippina!
- Eunuch!
Me a eunuch?
You should ask your sister Livilla.
She always serves this family lemonade.
- Has everything been arranged?
- It is done.
- Aren't you going to bed?
- Later. I need to study these papers first.
- It will only take an hour or two.
- Maybe more. - I can stay up all night.
(Nero laughs)
Stop it!
Poppea, stop tickling my foot!
- Stop it, Poppea!
- Who is tickling you? I am combing my hair.
What? But there's something tickling my foot.
It's the snake! The one I put in mama's bed!
- Kill it, Poppea!
- It's impossible to sleep in peace here!
- I bet it was your mother who put it there.
- I'm sure. - You two keep exchanging it.
If you want to marry me you have to learn
to live with the vipers and the poison...
(scared)
- What is going on here?
- Caesar!
How can anyone sleep with such noise?
What do you want?
- We have found a snake in a room.
- I have killed it.
- It's the one from Tivoli. - What?
- Gone, and wake my mother.
Go! Quickly!
But my mother had three snakes...
The one from Tivoli, the one Poppea killed...
And the third one, with the horn.
The deadliest of them all!
The horned snake is still on the loose!
- Tacitus! - What do you want?
- Are you tickling me while I sleep?
- Who, me? - Yes, you touched my beard.
- Me? You are out of your mind!
Tesoruccius, do you smell a snake?
Senators, citizens, friends...
...the mother of Nero, the wise,
and the good Agrippina, is dead.
I do not cry for her, my friends, I envy her.
In death she has reached the perfection...
...that we all seek in vain while we live...
- Master, what is it?
- Nothing. I saw something impossible.
I didn't know engagement meant snakes in my bed.
- You will have to get used to it.
- I should have married that merchant.
Do you want to make me angry?
(jingle)
- Snakes are around and you are playing?
- Look at my latest invention.
Worthy of the imperial genius!
If a snake passes, it will move.
The bells will ring.
And then I hit it with this stick!
(cries)
Jupiter, Mercury and Saturn!
What happened?
The ceiling has collapsed. A catastrophe!
Oh no, Agrippina is dead!
No!
Agrippina is alive!
She lives.
- Yes! Yes! - She is. - She is alive!
Nero! Nero!
- There! The viper! - But who is this?
- It made the bells ring!
Aniceto, why are you pretending to be a snake!
Crepereius is dead, but your mother is alive.
- You fool! I must escape.
- No, the Germans are everywhere.
Where is the emperor?
- Good morning, Augusta.
- Where is the room of that woman?
Poppea? She is in the third room on the right.
- Have your men surround the villa.
- Jawohl!
- Aniceto, take Poppea away. - Come.
- No. - Leave now. - No.
- Didn't you hear, mama is coming!
- This is my bed, I'm not leaving.
Here she comes!
- Augusta, would like to tell you...
- Nero! NERO!
- Yes, mother?
- You, get out!
I was asleep.
Oh, mother! What brings you here?
You leave now, go away!
Very well, but you won't get away with this.
Oh, how beautiful you look, mother.
You are up very early this morning.
I almost stayed in that bed forever.
The ceiling has collapsed on my bed.
- The ceiling! You could have been dead.
- Instead, only Crepereius was killed.
Such a common end only happens to mortals.
- And you are immortal, then?
- Only history will tell.
This strange drink for example.
Have you ever seen this before?
- Not me. What is it?
- Poison. - Take it away!
- Would you like me to test its effect?
- Yes.
Yes, yes.
Oh, no! Mother, don't! Oh mama, why did you?
Oh, mother...
Mama, don't you feel anything?
- You are alright? - Yes. - Yes?
It's like a nice refreshment to me.
Mama, you actually like it?
I take poison every morning with my breakfast.
Otherwise you would have been an orphan long ago.
Remember what I say to you now:
If some day a snake will bite me,
it will be the end for the snake.
Oh that's a good one, mama.
You think I'm joking? You try it.
One drop will kill you. Drink it.
- You are crazy? I'm too young to die.
- Do what I tell you!
- No, mother! I do not want to die.
- You do not want, eh?
It's Poppea who should die, she and
all the parasites that surround you.
Too many conspirators under this roof.
Who is conspiring?
WHO CONSPIRES? WHO CONSPIRES IN MY HOUSE?
Who conspires? Tell me who is conspiring?
- First, one who has your complete confidence.
- Who is it?
- This is a letter of Seneca that I
intercepted yesterday. - You? - Yes.
- You intercepted it? - Yes.
- Let me see, what does it say?
"Dear Lucillus, you ask me
about the voice of Nero.
Everyone here thinks that
Nero has a mediocre voice."
I will burn them all! The savages!
Except Seneca.
Continue.
"As for me, officially, I say
that Nero has a sublime voice."
Sublime. He said sublime.
- Continue. - Mamma, he said sublime.
- Read on. - The letter says sublime.
"But if you ask me, Lucillus, I
say that Nero sings like a dog."
Keep the lions safe. They will
have to eat all of the guests.
Let the trial begin!
Achtung!
Emperor, Nero, father and saviour of the land...
...has instructed me to open the trial.
All guests in this villa
are guilty of conspiracy...
... against the emperor himself
and against his mother Augusta.
By virtue of the exceptional powers
that have been granted to the emperor...
...he will judge and condemn all of the
accused with fair and honest judgement.
- Why do you not kneel down before me?
- But who will pull me up? - Of course.
- Who are you? - Ugulilla.
- I remember her. I have an idea.
My dear friends, if it pleases you...
... I'll make it so that none of you
will ever have to hear me sing again.
- But all of us admire you.
- You sing like a meadowlark!
A lark! Let me show you how
the lark sharpens its beak.
Hold out your hands!
I will kill you all!
- Mercy! Have mercy on us. Be merciful!
- What?
Be merciful! Be merciful!
- Aniceto, I don't understand this madman.
- Have mercy, Caesar.
- And who is this?
- Pison, the architect Pison.
- Pison, Pison... Pison we give to the lion.
- No! Not the lions!
Yes. Let me see your legs.
- Skinny! So skinny! Aren't you ashamed?
- No...
The legs are too skinny! There is
nothing here for the lions to eat.
- There is no animal that would eat him.
- Thank you, oh thank you.
But if not a beast, then who will eat him?
- What about you?
- Me? I'm not a cannibal, I'm in the navy.
You are an executioner. Just eat a
little bit and throw away the rest.
Now take him to the kitchen and don't argue!
We are innocent, Caesar, trust us!
Stop that, don't touch him. It's a fair trial.
Aniceto, this man is to be embalmed as he is.
Make a hole in his head, and put a torch in.
Then take him to his mother. Such colours!
- Thank you, Nero.
- Don't mention it.
(desperate cries)
- Nero, my dear.
- Mama, how delightful to see you.
Bravo, darling. I see you have
taken up the sword of justice.
Yes, mama, I can feel the noble
spirit of grandfather inside me.
I see. And where are Poppea and Seneca?
They are in the cellar, awaiting their
supreme judgment. Ah, Poppea calls.
Monster!
- If I must die, then you must do it.
- Cover yourself, you shameless girl.
- You are trying to corrupt him.
- Don't you try to corrupt me!
Very well. What are we accused of?
What are the charges?
She participated in the Christian rituals.
But YOU were the one who
took me to the catacombs!
My only son!
With the Christians, in the catacombs!
Just once... I was curious. I asked myself:
"What are they like, these catacombs?"
"The streets are congested with traffic".
"Could we use them to solve traffic jams?"
What a scandal!
Oh, don't worry about the Christians.
I know them, they are innocent types.
They are little people with soft voices.
Let's not waste any more time about it.
What are you going to do about Poppea?
Poppea... Poppea... Poppea...
I have it. It is a rhyme, for I am poet.
We throw Poppea from the rock of Tarpea.
- Nero, don't do it. I love you. No!
- Away!
And now we come to Seneca. Where is Seneca?
Be lenient with him, please.
He has always been a friend.
If you have to condemn him, I cannot watch.
- Try talk your way out of this one.
- Rauss! Out!
- My son is finally going the right way.
- When will the executions take place?
After my departure. Otherwise, the senate
could think I had something to do with it.
- When do you leave? - Immediately. - Yes.
- Is this your letter?
- Whatever is mine you can take, if you wish.
What does it say? Read it, Seneca.
- "Dear Lucillus..." - Dear Lucillus...
- Dear Lucillus... - Read it!
"Dear Lucillus, you ask to about Nero's voice."
"All the guests of the villa think,
that Nero has only a mediocre voice."
- That is not true. - That's what you said.
"Mediocre". Even though you always applaud.
Continue!
"As for me, I declare officially
that Nero has a sublime voice."
So much for that...
- You come here, Seneca, that is not the end.
Read! - The end? - Yes.
But to you, dear Lucillus, I say
that Nero sings... like...
Read it clearly, Seneca. sings like?
- Sings... like... a god.
- Like a god? - A god.
- What does it say? - Like a god.
Seneca, don't abuse my patience, read clear.
Nero...
It says, sings like a dog.
- You confess?
- Yes, I confess it says "like a dog". So?
- "So?"!
- Is it bad to say Nero sings like a dog?
You have called the emperor a dog!
You are condemned to death for lese-majeste.
- Nero, do you consider that offensive?
- You have called me a dog.
Yes, I used the word "dog".
But what does the word "dog" mean?
What does it means? It means dog.
The word "dog" has more than one meaning.
It is vague, ambiguous, even mysterious.
Very strange, in a clear language like ours...
What are you laughing at? This is serious.
You see, friends, isn't everyone
like a dog to himself.
- And do dogs bark beautifully?
- Certainly.
(dog sounds)
Howling...
In this case, your songs, Caesar.
But think how marvellous, a dog that sings!
It's a miracle!
- So you insist in saying that I am a dog!
- Not, I do not insist.
- But you've written it here.
- No! Friends, be my witness.
Lucillus, if you would ask me,
I'll say he sings like a god.
But he has never asked me,
so I have never said that.
No, no, no. Wait a minute, Seneca.
You already wrote I sing like a dog.
- Like a god. - It says "dog". - "God".
- No, "dog". - It says "god" here!
- It says "dog".
- You believe that?
You must be more careful when I dictate!
You have written "god" backwards!
You've nearly sent me to my death!
- You wrote that? I will cut off your hands!
- No, be merciful, dear Nero.
Do not rob this Greek idiot of his tools...
His only means of existence... the fool...
His head is empty... He is innocent!
- You see, Nero... - Seneca.
We write the letter with "god"...
and then everything's sorted out.
It seems so simple! What are you doing?
You have destroyed the evidence!
You don't need proof to condemn me to death.
- My friends and me are ready to die for you.
- No!
They are not ready at all!
Yes, Nero, when we are all dead,
with the guidance of your mother...
... you will become a great general.
I can already see you before me,
wearing the armour of Germanicus...
I see you at the head of a great army...
...riding over the frozen North...
...ready to fight barbarians to the death.
Indifferent to all the hardships,
breaking the ice with his sword...
Marching through terrible snowstorms!
Not afraid for the British savages.
By Jove! Segimerus!
Segimerus! Stop.
This is your destiny, Nero. I have said.
- What? - We do not fear the cold, Nero.
We will die with you in the icy North.
We will die with you in the icy North.
But are you crazy? Isn't it warm enough here?
Are they crazy?
(coughs)
I have never felt so cold in my life.
You just made me catch a cold!
Aniceto, isn't that the litter of my mother?
Yes, she is going to Anzio.
She does not want to watch the executions.
- What executions?
- Seneca, Poppea, the guests. The lions are ready.
Imbecile! Set them free at once.
Do you want me frozen to death in the North?
Now go.
Aniceto, how would you like to
command the ship of my mother?
Yes, Caesar. I am a navy officer.
- What's that? - An officer of the navy.
- Yes? - Yes.
You would like that?
This time he is really going straight.
The mother is always the mother.
For a slave as well as an emperor.
(banging)
- What is that noise below?
- They are repairing the hold.
They said it wouldn't take long.
Nice work. This job deserves a reward.
- Thank you! - Caesar is too generous.
- Go now!
Aniceto! Aniceto, look, what do you think?
- what is it? - what is it? - what is it?
- A fountain? - No, a tap.
Pull this, and the ship sinks in two hours.
- But I am on the ship.
- That doesn't matter. Think of my mother.
- She could drown. - Could?
- If the ship sinks, so will she.
- Aniceto, you don't seem to understand.
- But why?
- My mother must drown! - And me?
- But who are you?
- The captain of the ship.
The captain will go down with his ship.
- Why, don't you know how to swim?
- No. - And this is our navy! Shame!
Aniceto, don't waste my time.
When my mother goes to sleep,
you pull the lever and...
- And me? - You will die!
Sleep well, mother. Safe journey home!
The next time I see you, we
will be ready to go to war.
Yes, mama, we will go to war.
- Farewell, mama. - You mean goodbye.
- Good bye, mother.
Everyone at the oars. Lift the anchor.
At last, I am captain of a ship.
Quickly, she goes away!
I never doubted you, Seneca. Believe me.
It was my mother's fault. It's OK now.
- Look, here they are.
- Soon Aniceto will open the valve.
- Why do you rejoice in other people's
misfortunes? - Oh, how I shall rejoice.
- The mother... - She is always the mother.
- She has always been the mother.
- What did you do? - You did it? - Yes.
- What does it do? - It's a hole.
- A hole, with a tap on it?
In the shape of a lion's head.
Go on, Aniceto, do it!
Here we go.
Senators, citizens, friends...
...the mother of Nero, the kind
and gentle Agrippina, has died.
- I do not cry, friends...
- Instead I envy her!
- It was written like that when the
ceiling had almost collapsed on her.
OK, forget the ceiling, instead write:
...Neptune, the jealous God,
has embraced her tightly...
...down in the deep realms of the sea.
- Help, Agrippina, I am drowning!
- Shame on you, Aniceto!
A true captain goes down with his ship.
Here are the legions that I prefer.
Ahead to the conquest of the world.
(inaudible)
(music)
- Where are we taking it? - To the museum.
- Who is this? - How should I know?
Goodbye, grandfather! Time to go back.
- I thought you sided with Agrippina?
- I did, until she died, of course.
- Is she really dead?
- Yes, very dead. The ship went down.
(scared)
The Greek...
The Syrian...
- Take command. - On the double.
- Attention!
One kiss for you... one for you...
A kiss for you... and one for you!
- Mother! Are you a ghost!
- No ghost! You are under arrest!
- Open the door, rascal!
- No, you are a ghost...
Open the door and you'll see I am alive.
I am haunted! Jupiter, save me!
- Caesar!
- A Christian scoundrel. Aniceto!
- You managed to save yourself?
- Yes, but so did your mother.
I tried to drown her, but she swam away.
- It is not a ghost, she is alive!
- I am running out of patience.
Break down that door. Wait a minute...
- Arrest her. She tried to kill the emperor!
- Arrest them.
We will arrest them!
How dare you lay a hand on me. Arrest them!
You will obey my orders, you're
paid by the state! Capture her!
Kill me if you can!
I will show you how a true Roman dies.
But you will come with me, Seneca.
- My Germans will avenge me.
Is it not so, Segimerus? - Yes.
A moment, we cannot die all together.
- Agrippina, call of your Germans.
- Why, are you afraid?
Me! On the contrary.
We are all very selfish.
We only think of our own deaths...
Excuse me...
We do not think of Nero, who will
be all alone. - What you propose?
A deal. We can't abandon Nero like this.
We can talk, and try to
settle our differences.
What a man! Why, he could talk
his way out of a lion's mouth.
- What is happening? - Silence.
- But how did you save yourself?
- Boh... - What? - Boh...
The dispute between us is clear.
You want war, I want peace. Poppea?
War or peace, it makes no difference to me.
I want to marry Nero. I've waited a long time.
Very well, I consent.
But you, what do you give to me in exchange?
For me, as long as I can stay out of the
trenches, I will agree to anything you ask.
I want only one thing: Nero should not sing!
- To be honest, Nero sings like a dog.
- Is it wise to say that?
Why not, everyone knows it.
All of Rome thinks so too.
No-one in the entire Roman empire
wants to hear his voice ever again.
- Yes, Nero sings like a dog. A dog.
- We all agree.
But they're all of the same opinion!
And even the people of Rome agree...
It is clear to me now.
I know what has to be done.
He has no talent for singing at all.
We will never have to
listen to his songs again.
Three blocks of marble.
So, I sing like a dog?
Now finally you are silent.
Good thing too.
Yes, I know, you told me that all
of Rome thinks I sing like a dog.
Rome called me a dog.
Now look at Rome!
Do you want to know why I did it?
# The reason why is,
none of your business! #