Miss Pettigrew,
I was warned of your
stubbornness and impertinence,
and I should have known
better when you were called the
"governess of last resort."
But I had no idea
of your utter unsuitability.
You are dismissed.
- But, Mrs. Brummegan...
Away!
Allow me one last chance...
Goodbye, Miss Pettigrew.
I'm owed
a week's wages.
I say! I'm terribly sorry!
I do apologize.
Oh, no! My things!
My things!
Let me help you with that.
They'll have me back
in prison for this.
Oh!
Oh, nothing serious.
Well, when I say serious, I...
No.
Wait! Your...
Your belongings!
Sorry!
Gerry?
Edythe, if you can keep your hands
off him for just two seconds...
We're getting our
own cab, thank you.
That's naughty!
Let's get out
of here, Gerry.
Washburns.
Jane, aged five.
Lovely girl.
- Lost in the park...
Independence.
That's all that girl needs...
For six hours?
The Randle boys,
John and Robin.
" Wrestled retired Colonel Johnson to
the floor outside Fortnum and Mason's,
"shouting, 'Nazi warmonger'
because..." And I quote,
"Miss Pettigrew thought
he was a German spy."
A little joke.
"Ambulance called.
Police called."
Yes. And now
the Brummegans.
Miss Pettigrew,
we live in uncertain times.
My goodness, there
could be a war any day.
Do you think that work
is easy to find?
No, no.
Certainly not, Miss Holt.
But Mrs. Brummegan was...
Well, fond of a sherry,
if you take my meaning.
As a vicar's daughter,
I found her rather difficult.
No, she found you rather
difficult, Miss Pettigrew.
And that is, I'm afraid,
a recurring theme.
Miss Holt?
- Yes, Jilly?
The Lafosse household rang
last night. Still looking.
Thank you. Yes, I
won't be a moment.
A person can change.
I haven't seen any sign of that.
She could stop drinking.
Our clients don't adapt to
suit your needs, Miss Pettigrew,
you adapt to them!
I am trying,
Miss Holt. Really.
Give me one last chance.
You won't regret it.
My dear woman, I
already have. Thrice.
I'm afraid we have nothing
suitable for you at the moment.
Good day, Miss Pettigrew.
- Shall I come back tomorrow?
The situation is most
unlikely to have changed.
The day after?
Only if you desire the exercise.
Miss Holt.
Please, I implore you.
Yes, Miss Holt?
Miss Darlington is finishing with
Carole Lombard this week, isn't she?
She would be perfect for the
Lafosse residence, don't you think?
I think she would
be an excellent choice.
Can you refer
to her file for me?
Certainly.
Thank you.
I said good day,
Miss Pettigrew.
Good day.
Amazing.
Hi.
I have come
from Miss Holt's Agency.
What time is it?
It's five minutes
past 10:00.
- Five minutes past.
In the morning?
- I believe so.
Oh, God!
Oh, my God,
look at the place.
I was given to believe
you were expecting me.
Miss Holt's
Employment Agency?
Darn right, honey.
And not a moment too soon.
Allow me.
Neat!
Time?
Six minutes
past 10:00.
Can I be of any
further assistance?
Not unless you can get Phil out of
bed in the next two minutes, you can't.
I've known my share of
naughty boys who oversleep.
You too, huh?
Phil! It's time
to wake up, darling!
Damn it!
- Allow me.
I can get your boy up
and dressed in no time.
You could? Really?
Certainly.
- Angel.
One must not stand for
any nonsense, that's all.
They just need to know
who's in charge.
First door at the top
of the stairs.
Philip?
Rise and shine, Philip!
As I said to your mother, I
won't stand for any nonsense.
You naughty boy, get up!
I kind of am up,
as you can see.
Oh, golly!
Excuse me, Mrs. Lafosse,
may I speak to you?
Mrs. Lafosse...
Oh, heavens!
Answer that, will you? If it's
Nick, tell him... Tell him I'm dead.
Good morning, this is Miss Holt
here, of Holt's Employment Agency.
I've just rung to say that one of our
best women is on her way over to you now.
Hello?
No, no,
no! That won't be necessary.
I'm afraid that
Mrs. Lafosse is dead.
Goodbye.
Don't really do kitchens.
Hmm.
Any luck with Phil?
I'm so sorry, Mrs.
Lafosse... Delysia.
Delysia, I'm afraid I walked in
on your guest in a state of nature.
I fear that I have outraged
his sense of propriety.
Oh, no, Phil doesn't
have one of those.
He's a much bigger boy
than I had expected.
Oh, you noticed.
He is, isn't he?
Uh...
Hello?
Darling!
Really?
Mmm-hmm.
You, too.
He's at the club.
Be here in 10 minutes.
Oh, God.
Who?
- Nick!
Another man?
Well, of course
another man!
Jeepers.
I'm afraid there has been
a misunderstanding.
I can see the problem clearly
now and I really must be going.
You do?
Pardon?
See the problem. Really?
Well, yes.
- I knew it.
From the moment I set eyes on you, I just
knew I could trust you. I can, can't I?
Yes, you can.
- Thank you.
Thank you.
You've saved my life.
Have I?
- Hmm.
A two-pronged attack
should do it. Let's go.
Though I don't think you
should mention about Nick.
Or Michael.
- Michael?
Is he your son?
- My son? Lord, no.
Michael wants
to marry me.
Another man?
You don't have to wake
the neighbors about it.
Besides, that's only three.
Phil's rather free
about where he undresses.
He's a theater producer.
Well, his father is.
Phil's got his first show on at
the Ambassador. I've got the lead.
Well...
I'm pretty sure
I have now.
Hello again.
Awfully sorry about earlier. I
thought you were someone else.
That is some relief,
I suppose.
Jolly nice to meet you, dear
lady, but who the devil are you?
Who is she, gorgeous?
She's, um...
You know, I'm not
altogether sure.
Pettigrew.
Guinevere Pettigrew.
Guinevere.
Guinevere. Wow.
Yes, but who is she?
What in the world is she doing
in this particular bedroom
when you are
so obviously starkers
beneath that delightful
gown, don't you know?
We have...
An engagement.
- A meeting.
Meeting. Important meeting.
- Indeed we do. In 20.
Two...
- Twenty-two.
Not 22, Guinevere,
dearest. Two minutes.
What the dickens
can be as important
as another hour in bed
with young Philip-me-lad?
You don't mind,
do you, Guinevere?
It's all a bit new to me,
and it's devilish good fun.
Besides, I have
nothing till lunch.
Come back to bed,
beautiful.
Baby, baby, I'd
love to, but I can't.
Come on, it's an awfully good
cure for a hangover, I'm told.
Edythe's lingerie
show is at 11:00.
Anyway, haven't you
got to get ready?
Who are you lunching?
- Nobody, really.
Charlotte Warren.
The Rabbit?
Why? She run out of carrots?
- Sweetie-pops...
But you said the lead was mine.
Phil, honey, you promised!
It is. It is. I'm sure it
is. You're the one, baby.
I just have to
clear it with Daddy,
being the bounder with
the checkbook and all.
You know, he wants me to meet
her. Amazing voice, apparently.
If you like
air-raid sirens.
It's just lunch, darling.
Come on, Delysia.
Remind your producer why you're
right for such a passionate part.
Charlotte Warren
the actress?
Know her, what?
I did happen to see her last
night on Shaftesbury Avenue.
With who?
- Who with?
A man.
- Producer?
Mmm.
- Spivvy fellow?
Mmm.
- Nasty side-parting?
Mmm.
I knew it!
Danny ruddy Greenwood,
dash it all. On the poach.
Well, we'll see
about that.
Oh, Phil, you can't think that
Charlotte Warren is right for Hortensia?
Not with that
damp little nose.
Jacket?
- Behind you.
A quick egg
and I'm off.
I regret
we're out of eggs.
You know this?
- I'm afraid I do.
Bacon?
- So sorry, no.
Sausage?
- If only.
Smoked haddock fillets?
- Definitely not.
Toast.
I saw the baker's girl
deliver a loaf yesterday.
Allow me.
Guinevere, you've got to get him
out of here. We're on a deadline.
Toast is only
two minutes.
I realize it is not
my place, but
isn't it possible simply not to
answer the door to this Nick fellow?
Oh, I can't do that.
- Why?
It's his flat.
- Oh.
Jeepers, he's early!
Toast!
Marvelous.
Tie?
Any tea on the go,
perchance?
Sweets,
Danny Greenwood
is at this very second,
sending flowers around to
Charlotte's little warren.
You think so?
That does seem to be the
producer's modus operandi.
It does, doesn't it?
You know the business, what?
Not that you're in the least bit
interested in Charlotte Warren.
No. No. Darling, you're the
one for me. You know that.
And I don't just
mean on the stage.
I say.
What?
- Delysia?
Clean it up.
- Delysia.
I can't go yet. I have
something important to say.
Just... Right now?
Delysia...
- Yes, my sweets?
I love you.
Fiddlesticks,
working relationships.
You and me.
How about it, old girl?
Don't let any rabbits
under your fence.
Bye.
Delysia?
Lift up the spout?
I rather think so, yes.
Delysia? Is that you?
He saw the gown,
damn it.
I believe we
have made it.
You're a bona fide
genius, Guinevere!
Miss Lafosse,
it has been a most exciting, one might
say exhilarating experience, meeting you,
though I can't help feeling one
fraught with moral complexity.
But now that the crisis has been
averted, I simply must take my leave.
What? Oh, you can't go. Please
don't go. The crisis is ongoing.
Goodness.
Guinevere...
Miss Pettigrew...
I don't know what I'd do
if you went. I beg you.
It's Nick.
I need saving.
- Saving?
Mmm-hmm. Have you ever been
hypnotized by a snake, Guinevere?
I don't believe so, no.
Well, it's what they do
to small furry animals.
The snake fixes the animal with
its eyes, so it has no will.
It stays when it
should be running.
It wants to stay,
even if it means death.
And I am that
small furry animal.
And Nick Calderelli, coming up the
stairs this very minute, is that snake.
When he's here, I just... I can't
resist him. And he's bad for me.
So bad. And when I waver,
and I will waver,
I need you
to be strong for me.
Please. Stay.
I can see I have no choice.
You're clearly in danger.
Oh, thank you!
But I'm afraid it is you
who must be strong.
You're right. I must.
The time has come
to break it off.
And with you beside me,
I feel strong,
confident, firm.
There is something so sensual about fur
next to the skin, don't you think? Mmm!
Miss Lafosse,
you're slipping already.
Strong, confident, firm.
I know! But I can't help it.
But I must.
Nick!
I feel like I've just climbed bloody
Everest. The lift's on the blink.
Darling.
It's you!
That wasn't you, was it?
- Me?
In the lift?
- The lift?
Lift? Oh, you mean elevator.
- That's exactly what I...
I didn't know
you had company.
But, Nick, I get so
lonely when you're away.
This is...
Pettigrew.
Guinevere Pettigrew.
A pleasure, Miss
Pettigrew, I'm sure.
And you are,
what, a friend?
I am Miss Lafosse's new
governess... Social secretary.
Social secretary.
Really?
Isn't it a little early
for camouflage?
I beg your pardon?
I haven't had
the opportunity...
It's nice to meet you,
Miss Pettigrew,
but D and I haven't seen
each other for three weeks.
Got a lot of
catching up to do.
So if you
wouldn't mind.
But of course.
Good day.
But, Nick, darling!
- What?
Well, I've got a fashion show
to get to. Haven't I, Guinevere?
Fashion show be damned. Who
needs clothes, eh, gorgeous?
Damned or not, I'm afraid Miss
Lafosse has accepted the invitation.
Well, cancel.
Come on, darling.
Close the door
on your way out.
I'm sure that we can schedule
something for later in the week.
I beg your pardon?
I think that Miss
Lafosse has an hour
Wednesday at 9:30.
Shall I pencil it in?
No. I'm penciling now.
Nick, darling, I'm afraid
that Guinevere's right.
I'm terribly busy
this morning.
Oh.
You haven't...
You haven't had any
other guests, have you?
No, darling.
Just us girls together.
I thought I saw Phil
Goldman's car outside.
Phil?
- Goldman.
Do we know him?
Andy Goldman's
idiot boy.
Pouring Daddy's millions away at the
Ambassador on some stupid musical.
Pile on the Piffle.
- Pepper.
Pepper?
- I'm told.
Since when did girls together
smoke cigars? Hmm? Answer me that.
If I want to smoke cigars,
I'll damned well smoke cigars,
thank you very much.
And to hell with your opinion.
What, they're yours?
You betcha, baby.
Oh!
And you thought
that I...
What?
- Nick...
You, of all people?
How could you?
I'm wounded,
Nicholas, I am wounded.
Darling, sweetheart.
Please forgive me.
It's been a long night. I'm...
No.
- I'm sorry.
No. It's...
It's no good.
All right,
I forgive you!
Fashion show.
Come again?
Fashion show.
Fashion...
Fashion show is right.
And that will be your punishment, man
of little faith. You will have to wait.
What? So I'm being thrown out
of my own flat, am I?
I'm sorry, darling.
Very well.
Tonight then.
At the club.
Miss Pettigrew.
Good day.
Tonight is booked.
You were magnificent!
Are you all right?
I have never sworn
before in my life.
Not even in my mind.
Well, I didn't hear you swear.
- Yes, I did.
I said damned and hell.
And I meant them.
Oh, that's not swearing.
They came out of the
sinful category an age ago.
Desperation.
That's what it's come to.
A little desperation and life can
make of us whatever it chooses.
In my case, a smoking, swearing accomplice
to misdeeds in a den of iniquity.
No! Really?
Oh, you mean here.
But I was the desperate one.
I'm always desperate.
Think of what would have
happened if you hadn't been here.
I shudder to think what
goes on when I'm not here.
Morals are very important
to me, Miss Lafosse.
I am the daughter
of a clergyman.
Poor you.
No. It was a perfectly
good upbringing, thank you.
But I am beginning to think
perhaps a little sheltered.
But it's not
always like this.
Occasionally
it's not like this.
All right, it's always like
this. Is that so very awful?
Please don't go.
You just can't go.
This is the most important
day in my whole life.
I'll phone up that Holt lady right
now and I'll double your salary.
Oh, no, no, no! Thank you.
That won't be necessary.
I don't even know
what a social secretary does.
I only got one because
Charlotte " Rabbit" Warren's got one,
so I figured I'd better get one, too.
Now that I see you in
action, you're just amazing.
Am I? That's very
kind of you to say so.
Phil, gone. Nick, gone. And that
cigar. But that was fast thinking.
I'm only happy to have
been of assistance.
Miss Pettigrew,
I love you.
Well, come on!
Why don't you slip
something else on, Guinevere?
I mean, nobody died,
did they?
Or did Carole make you wear that
sackcloth and ashes for contrast?
Make herself look
even more amazing.
Carole?
That's not a game I play,
Guinevere, I can assure you.
So, let's lose the
blackout curtain, shall we?
These clothes appear to be
the only ones I possess.
You're kidding.
Shoes?
I'm afraid not.
Oh. So, let's go buy some!
I'm not in a position to.
Out of cash?
None at all?
- None at all.
Wow. You social secretaries
sure can spend.
Roulette, was it? Blackjack?
- Certainly not.
Well. Whatever,
it's on me.
No, no, no, I couldn't possibly...
- You sure could possibly.
I, for one, am not running around
town with Oliver Twist's mom.
After the lingerie show,
we go shopping.
It's so frightening.
Yeah. Cap sleeves.
It's a horror show.
It's a nice color, though.
- Yes, very nice color.
Are you cold?
Well, perhaps a little.
- Here.
Oh, no, I couldn't.
- No, you must.
It's a little thank-you
for this morning.
It's beautiful.
Guinevere! Don't
dawdle, we're late!
Today is the day that
Phil announces to the world
who's going to play the lead
in Pile on the Pepper.
And with the lingerie
that I'm about to pick up,
it's no contest, honey.
" Delysia Lafosse
tops the bill!"
How exciting! Is it
to be a West End show?
It is to be a West End smash, Guinevere,
and it's going to make me a star.
I thought
you were a singer.
Well, I've got a voice. But that's
not how you become famous. No.
First stop, West End.
Next stop, Hollywood.
Have you done much
of that sort of thing?
Didn't you catch
Every Day's a Holiday?
One of mine.
- Mae West!
Oh, you did see it?
Oh, yes! Which part were you?
I was in the restaurant scene.
In the back.
- Really?
Behind the palm tree
drinking a margarita.
I...
I think they cut that
for the European print.
A little de trop for you
English, if you know what I mean?
Of course. Of course
there's Four's a Crowd,
with Errol Flynn and...
- Olivia de Havilland!
Seen that as well?
Four's a Crowd is
a wonderful picture.
Who were you?
- The crowd.
Here we are.
Quick, quick.
Guinevere. Come on.
Don't be shy.
She's naked!
Well, hardly. There's so much whalebone on
her, I'm looking for a tail and flippers.
This season's must-have
for the fuller figure,
the Slimlastic corset and uplift
brassiere. A most effective reducer.
If you don't mind a collapsed lung.
- I recognize her.
Edythe? She owns the
best salon in London.
All the latest fashion.
All the latest gossip.
Another slenderizer from
Aphrodite, for the winter season,
is this unique wrap-around
corset with side panels
and front-to-back gussets,
in fleece-lined rubber,
with rustproof steel
spirals throughout.
Rustproof steel. You guys
really are preparing for war.
Guinevere?
A man. In the room.
Oh. Oh,
that's just Joe.
He designs underwear.
And not these walking
air-raid shelters.
Beautiful things.
There are very few men who really
appreciate the female figure like Joe.
It doesn't matter
what you're wearing,
he can see right through to
the real woman underneath.
Oh.
Oh, this is
his collection.
And new this season from Mimi,
designed by Joe Blomfield.
He's dating Edythe.
Tempestuous is the word
that the magazines use.
I mean, of course she's a
darling, but a little difficult.
As you can see, it's going to
be a chilly winter for Mimi fans.
And in that ever-practical
you're going to have to employ
another maid to do the washing, ladies.
That's if you can afford one
after you've paid
through the nose
for one of these frou-frou.
Oh, dear.
I guess they had
another bust-up.
And you'd better
start your diet now
because there's no hiding
your indulgences, ladies.
Not a support in sight
to help human nature.
Excuse me a moment?
Thank you, ladies.
Joe.
- Margery!
So, what can you do to prop
up this ancient monument?
If you must talk
of ancient monuments,
did you know that the Elgin
Marbles were once painted?
No, I can't say that I did.
Bright, garish colors. Awful.
Now aren't they
better just marble,
worn a little into something
wise, as well as beautiful?
Joe Blomfield, you are
the world's best flatterer.
Or maybe I'm saying
you belong in a museum.
You don't tamper with
a masterpiece, Margery.
You allow it to be.
That's my advice to you.
That scarf, if I may say,
looks perfect on you.
Well, thank you.
It was a present.
You know, I think it's the most
beautiful thing I've ever worn.
Now the flatterer
has been out-flattered.
Sorry?
- It's one of mine.
The design.
Last year for Mimi Couture.
My goodness.
You really didn't know.
Well, that is a compliment
indeed, madam. Thank you.
Joe Blomfield.
Guinevere Pettigrew.
- A pleasure.
Not to worry.
Well, I didn't
answer the telephone
because I couldn't
answer the telephone.
Why not?
- I was in the bathroom.
Having a bath?
No, I just didn't
answer the telephone,
and now Joe says
the engagement's off.
Just because of one stupid
little misunderstanding.
Edythe, Miss Pettigrew.
Edythe Dubarry.
Miss Pettigrew is my
new social secretary.
Really?
How intriguing.
I know. Lost her shirt
playing poker or something.
But she is the best in London.
Miss Holt told me so herself.
Just freed up after Carole Lombard
finished Vigil in the Night.
Isn't that right,
Guinevere?
I heard it's
a very fine picture.
Haven't we met before?
I don't believe so.
Recently.
I never forget a face.
You really shouldn't wear
those muddy browns, you know.
They're not your color.
- Oh.
The funeral parlor thing?
It's in hand.
We're on our way to your little store to
correct the situation this very minute.
My shop and salon are at
your disposal, my dear.
Oh!
Come with us!
We can do Guinevere, and
you can tell me all about Joe
and I can tell you about
my amazing morning.
Hang it all, the bone structure's
there. Why the devil not?
Beatrice, cancel my appointments.
I'm suddenly inconvenienced.
Perfect!
Come on, now!
What is she going to do?
- We're going to do a fixie!
Turned Nick
out of his own flat?
She didn't like him.
Good heavens! He let her?
- He was no match for her.
My dear, the woman can
do anything. Anything.
No. Definitely not. It's too pink,
it's too pass. Not that one, either.
And she's coming to the party?
- Well, of course.
She's going to clinch the lead
in Pile on the Pepper for me.
Oh, no, not the red. Not
with her hair, I think.
But I thought you'd secured
that deal last night.
Well, I thought so, too.
And I played it magnificently,
if I do say so myself.
But then Phil announced that he was
going to have lunch with the Rabbit.
Charlotte Warren?
- Mmm.
Oh, my dear.
- Exactly.
So you can see why I
need Guinevere's powers.
I do indeed.
I wonder...
Yes?
Oh, nothing.
That one!
- That one!
Miss Lafosse? Oh!
Oh!
Thank you. Very nice.
Guinevere,
I think we're ready.
And you're sure that's all
it was, Edythe, my dear?
Just a late train?
No Gerry involved?
You're as bad as Joe.
Gerry and I are finished.
Absolutely finished.
So Tabitha and I bumped into him
at Hat Day at the races. What of it?
We got the last train in to Victoria
and that was absolutely that.
My fruit fedora was much
admired, thank you for asking.
Joe can check with the station
if he's so damnably suspicious.
Arrived at 11:30 and took
a taxi straight home. Alone.
The whole thing
is ridiculous.
One late train and the
whole marriage is off.
Men are so untrusting.
I can't think why.
Are you all right?
Sorry, I was just
remembering something.
Everything all right,
Guinevere?
Oh, yes. Just a moment.
This is me?
All you.
As nature intended.
Guinevere, control
yourself, for heaven's sake!
The mascara!
No, of course.
Of course.
That was close.
Well, I'm just gonna put this, and a
few other things, on Nick's account.
I'll be right back.
Well, what
a transformation.
I suppose I've never felt
I really deserved it.
A social secretary
such as yourself?
Carole Lombard's social
secretary, no less.
Eyeliner.
As you're such
a wow with the men,
I was wondering whether you
could have a word with Joe for me.
Smooth this little
misunderstanding over.
We're getting married,
you know. Were.
It would mean
such a lot to me.
I'm afraid
I couldn't do that.
Really?
You and I, Guinevere, we don't have
what the Delysias of this world have.
We have to work at it,
improvise a touch,
act a little to get
what we want.
You know what I mean,
don't you?
There.
I'm sure Delysia
wouldn't mind.
Well, that should put a
few more gray hairs on Nick's head.
My, you do look ravishing.
- Wonderful news!
Guinevere has very kindly offered
to sort things out with Joe for me.
But that's a marvelous idea. If anybody
can make Joe see sense, Guinevere can.
Isn't that right?
Okay. Come on.
Listen.
Nick?
Fingers like bananas.
Philip?
Oh, yes.
Charlotte Warren.
Permit me.
Thief. Burglar.
I've had some reactions to my
playing, but never quite that.
I saw you at the jail.
I saw you.
Oh, it's you!
I say, I'm awfully
sorry about that.
Michael!
It's so good to see you.
However did you get in?
One picks up a few tricks
in prison, you know?
Breaking and entering
being one of them.
So.
What have you got
to say for yourself?
Oh, well...
I think I must have gotten the
days mixed up. Or was it the place?
I'm awfully sorry, Michael.
Can you ever forgive me?
Now what do you say?
Part of me says if you do that again,
I'll heave you through the goddamn window.
And another part
of me says that
I deserve it. Every bit.
Oh, no. Don't play that game
with me. Not this time, Delysia.
What do you mean?
You've made a fool out
of me for the last time.
Oh, don't say that, Michael.
You can do anything
you like to me. Anything.
Shake me again... No, better not
stand too close to the window.
Or maybe,
maybe kiss me?
Not a chance.
Why, you...
- I'm crazy about you.
You know that. But even I've
got my limit and I've reached it.
No more games,
no more lies.
No more Phil, no more Nick.
It's me, just me, or that's it.
I'll never
see you again.
You wouldn't.
See this? The Queen Mary.
Two tickets. Sails for
New York tomorrow morning.
I'm playing the Upper Deck Cocktail
Bar, with an as-yet-unannounced singer.
Now tell me I wouldn't.
But what about
the cabaret?
You and me together,
we're the best in London.
So we'll be the best
in New York.
Or not.
Isn't there a decent drink
in this hellhole?
Yes. What would you like?
It's me who should
be offering you a drink.
After our unfortunate meeting
yesterday, I am definitely in your debt.
How do you take
your whiskey?
He does seem to be a little
agitated about something.
Yes.
Well, I'm afraid that might be my fault.
- Indeed?
Ice pick?
- It's in the drawer.
Somewhere.
Ice in the Fridgidaire?
I want the pick
for murder, not ice.
See? He's such
a hothead.
He takes love
so seriously.
Is that a problem?
Of course
it's a problem!
Michael Pardew.
Pettigrew.
Guinevere Pettigrew.
About time we had
a formal introduction.
It's certainly a problem
when the girl doesn't
pitch up for the proposal.
Oh, Michael.
Not a word from you.
Thank you.
What do think of this?
Private boat on the Thames,
last of the
season's strawberries,
Dom Prignon champagne.
Everything.
Strawberries.
And you didn't appear?
I was scared.
You were scared?
How do you think a pianist without
two shillings to rub together
feels proposing to the most
beautiful woman in the world?
Dare I ask
what happened?
Well, after an hour and a half
bobbing around on my own,
I opened the champagne.
One glass didn't seem enough.
One thing led to another.
Then I had a bit
of a brainwave,
as we floated pastthe
Tower of London.
Oh, dear.
Decided the ring I had
wasn't good enough for her.
Well, when a fellow
needs a diamond,
what better place to get one
than the Tower of London?
The rest is all
a bit hazy, but
there appears to have been an
altercation with the yeoman of the guard.
You didn't.
Thirty days
bread and water.
But you know what?
Prison certainly
clears the head.
Pure and simple,
I want you to marry me.
And it's a one-word
conversation, Delysia.
Don't you think that on
such a momentous occasion
a little time
should be allowed?
Oh, stalling tactic.
Is it because I'm not
rich enough for her?
Certainly not.
Well, it's true. I'm wearing
most of my worldly possessions.
I could never offer
this kind of blackmail.
Oh.
And who pays you
for playing the piano, huh?
You telling me you give Nick
his money back after every show?
No! And every damned shilling
I take hurts me to the bone.
Which is why it's got
to change, Delysia.
Money or love? That's the
question I'm asking, D.
With you singing and me playing,
we could knock the world flat.
Yes or no, Delysia?
You are a most uncommonly
persuasive man, Mr. Pardew.
But surely a lady
should have a moment or two
to consider the most
important decision of her life?
A moment?
She's had a whole year.
You did say you
were in my debt.
Damn it, I did, too.
Fair enough.
Okay, here's the deal.
I'll play for you today,
Delysia,
and for the rest of your
life, if you'll marry me.
Never again
if you don't.
See you later, Miss Pettigrew.
- Later?
In my professional
capacity.
As for you,
it's now or never.
The ship sails
tomorrow morning.
He is...
Impossible.
- Magnificent.
So you marry him.
Guinevere?
- Mmm-hmm?
Tell me the honest truth.
It's a darned fix, isn't it?
Nothing that can't be unfixed
with some good common sense.
But take a look
at the headlines.
With Nick, I get this magnificent
flat and my job at the Peacock.
And with Phil,
I get the best part on the West End
stage and my chance to be a star.
And with Michael?
With Michael...
I get the best friend
I ever had.
Is that all Michael is?
Well,
he's rather passionate, too.
I know what
you're thinking.
Michael's the one.
But what about
everything else?
And who says I'm looking
for a darned husband
this very minute, anyway?
Not everything comes along
just when we want it.
There are times when
choices just have to be made,
or you certainly
will miss out.
No.
No, I won't accept that.
I won't.
This " all of you or none of
you" stuff that Michael's pulling.
It's too much.
But he is in love
with you, Delysia.
Can you say that
about anyone else?
Guinevere,
haven't you ever been torn between
more than one person at the same time?
No, I can't say I've had
that particular problem.
You are beautiful, Delysia.
Well, it's not a bad figure,
if I do say so myself.
Have you ever been
in love at all, Guinevere?
Once.
- And was it this
" all of you
or none of you" stuff?
Oh, yes.
From him or from you?
Both.
Really? Do tell.
No.
All a long time ago.
You'll catch your death.
Put this on.
Allow me.
Excuse me, madam.
Excuse me.
Excuse me?
Take that through
to the kitchen, please.
And you do the same as well.
And tell John to pull the rug up.
Party about to start
soon, so chop-chop.
Party? There's a party?
Miss Lafosse?
- Hmm?
There's a troop of people downstairs who
appear to be under the misapprehension
there is to be
a party here.
Yes.
Today?
Yes. Didn't I say?
- No.
Oh.
Silly me.
Will there be many people?
I should say so,
Guinevere.
It's the big one.
The big one?
- Pile on the Pepper.
Phil's going to make
the announcement.
What do you think?
Do I get the part? Hmm?
Oh, yes.
My dear, you look as if you've never
been to a cocktail party in your life.
Why, thank you,
but I don't drink.
Oh, it's not a drink,
really. It's a cocktail.
Good luck, darlings.
Joe's the old one
over there.
Work your magic.
Of all the nerve.
Well. Time to make
the Rabbit run.
Are you sure
that's wise?
Mmm.
Phil, darling.
Delysia, sweetheart.
Lovely to see you.
This is Charlotte Warren.
Do you know
each other?
A pleasure.
How nice
to see you again.
Phil and I had such a lovely lunch
together today, didn't we, darling?
Well, I thought he'd have a
big appetite, after last night.
May I suggest retiring
to a safe distance?
I think you're
absolutely right.
Tin hat on.
I'm sorry,
it's Phil Goldman.
How do you do?
- We've met before, actually.
You were entirely
naked at the time.
Guinevere?
Is that you?
My goodness!
You look marvelous.
Charlotte, I just wanted to let
you know there are no hard feelings.
That is so
gracious of you.
To the victor the spoils, to the
vanquished two comps for Press Night.
And so wise.
I hope I can be
like that one day.
Wisdom requires more than
the passing of years, I fear.
Though a little bird tells me that the
part of the crippled mother is still open.
You'd look ravishing
with a stick.
And I won't forget about those
tickets. Is it two, three, four...
Silly me, I've forgotten how
many boyfriends you've got.
Now, Philip,
how are your deliberations over
Pile on the Pepper proceeding?
Well, between
you and me,
Charlotte has the most
alluring singing voice.
And I have to say, Daddy's quite
keen. In fact, more than keen.
So you're going to give
Miss Warren the part?
Delysia's going to be a bit
off-color about it all, I'm afraid.
Hey ho.
- Just one question.
Does Charlotte have quite the
same attachment to you as Delysia?
No. No, no,
she certainly doesn't.
Do you think that was more
than a passing attraction?
I mean, we both
know actresses, Guinevere.
It did occur to me
that it might be, you know,
purely to secure the part?
I have no doubt that Miss Lafosse
believes that you are one of the most...
Unquestionably, the most
important man in that room.
My dear woman,
do you really think so?
I do.
The scales have fallen
from my doubting eyes.
So pleased to have helped.
- Helped?
You've just made me
the happiest man in the world.
You seem to have made
quite an impression on him.
Oh. Yes.
I do, don't I?
Joe Blomfield.
A great pleasure.
Have we met before? I feel sure
I recognize you from somewhere.
I don't think so,
but I'm delighted
to make your acquaintance.
I have met your fiance,
I believe.
Edythe? Um...
No longer my fiance,
I'm afraid.
Really? I'm so sorry.
Not a permanent rift, I hope?
It would be ungentlemanly
of me to go into the details.
Of course.
You know, these things
are amazing, aren't they?
May I?
Why not?
- Excuse me.
Progress?
I'm afraid not.
Nor is there likely to be.
Transformations work
both ways, Guinevere.
It would take me 30 seconds to put
you back in the soup kitchen queue.
I told you,
I never forget a face.
Victoria Station.
Nor have I forgotten with whom
you shared a taxi last night.
Oh, you have.
If you want to continue
working for Delysia, you have.
Now we all of us need things in
our life. I need Joe for his...
Well, he's a man of
connections. And you need...
You need to stay off of
the streets, I imagine.
I see Edythe
has told you all.
If it weren't to commit another
indiscretion, I might disclose Edythe is...
As Miss Lafosse would say,
crazy about you.
To be indiscreet back,
she's rather more crazy about my position
in the fashion world than she is about me.
A woman scorned
is a dangerous thing.
And a bruised heart will often
speak harshly, Mr. Blomfield.
Oh, I sometimes wonder where
Edythe's heart has got to.
A woman with an absent heart
would not shed such tears, I think.
Edythe?
Shed tears?
You people!
With your green drinks and your
parties and your subterfuges.
You're all playing at love.
One minute her, the next minute
someone else. Flit, flit, flit.
Well, I'm not playing.
Love is not a game.
You've worked
your magic again.
I can't do it.
- You've already done it.
Joe just came up
and asked me
if he was being a cad
breaking off the engagement.
I've no idea what you said,
but I believe we've got him.
It must be extraordinary
being you.
Extraordinary? No.
Very, very ordinary.
Delysia, darling, is it
true what Guinevere said?
Well, if Miss P said it,
you can bet your shirt on it.
So I can tell the whole
world about you and me?
Officially an item, what?
Till death us do part?
What?
At the very same time that you
announce your casting decision, sweets.
Oh!
And what better time
than right now?
You're absolutely right,
damn it. This very minute.
Come on, gorgeous, no
time to waste. To horse.
Well, I suppose
that was necessary.
You wanted the part. He'd
already chosen the Rabbit.
No, Delysia,
you mustn't do this.
But I must.
Ladies and gentlemen,
as you might know,
I'm putting on Pile on the Pepper
at the Ambassador, don't you know?
Have I mentioned this?
Anyway, it is my pleasure to
announce that I have, today,
cast the lead
actress, what?
She is not only Hortensia
in Pile on the Pepper,
she is also my Hortensia,
if you know what I mean.
Ladies and gentlemen,
your Hortensia
and my Hortensia,
Delysia Lafosse!
So
let's dance!
Michael?
May I?
- Please.
They don't remember
the last one.
No. They don't.
Delysia's name in lights at the
Ambassador. What do you think of that?
Well, it's certainly what
Delysia's always wanted.
Joe, my dear,
I don't think I could ever forgive
myself if last night's misunderstanding
got in the way of something
so, so important to us both.
I was wondering, could you
walk me home and let me explain?
Of course, my dear.
Of course.
Nice to have met you.
Did you see the planes?
Weren't they magnificent?
Madam?
Not now, thank you.
Well, what do you know?
It's my last night
singing at the club.
I'm going to be a star.
Well, aren't you going
to congratulate me?
I have done you
a disservice.
You have done what I asked.
That's your job.
It may well be my job, but what I have
done is untrue to you and untrue to me.
You have lost a man who
loves you for who you are,
not for who
you pretend to be.
And you, who are you to tell
me what's best for my life?
I'm nobody. But apparently
an expert on love.
No.
I have no one.
I am not
an expert on love.
I am an expert on the
lack of love, Delysia.
And that is a fate from which I
wish most fervently to save you.
Guinevere.
No pity, please. I endure
quite well, thank you.
Where to, ma'am?
Scarlet Peacock, please.
Do you know what
my name is, Guinevere?
I was under the impression
it was Delysia Lafosse.
Sarah Grubb.
One of the Pittsburgh Grubbs.
My father
is a steelworker.
No one else in the world
knows that, apart from Michael.
He doesn't judge me.
No. He wouldn't.
But you do.
- Me?
I certainly do not.
Oh, you think you don't,
but you do.
This is all I own,
Guinevere.
And two dozen pair
of shoes.
For all the fancy apartments
and fashion shows,
do you know how close I am
to having nothing?
Every day I wake up
and I think,
if I make the wrong move,
I could be out on that street,
with no clothes,
no food, no job
and no friends.
Just plain old
Sarah Grubb again.
Do you know what that's like?
Yes, I do.
You do?
In that at least,
we are alike.
And now my mascara's gonna run.
That will never do.
Here we are, ma'am.
How are you?
Hey.
Having fun?
Sweetheart.
- Nick. Hi.
Now, I've heard the news, darling.
Congratulations. It's the big time, huh?
Oh.
I thought you'd
be furious.
Furious, me? Why?
No. You and me,
we're the same.
We both get what we want
by bending a bit, don't we?
I get it, D.
It's business.
No, Nick, I...
I'll see you back
at mine later.
How can he just... He treats
me like I'm a common...
You don't think of
me like that, do you?
Of course not.
Delysia!
Darling!
Darling, you look perfect, what?
Doesn't she?
Guinevere, how lovely.
To you, I owe a special
debt of gratitude.
Champagne! The only thing as
delightful as my dear Delysia.
Darling, come on, finish
your glass. There's plenty.
It's all back on.
Darling,
that's marvelous.
Did you hear
the news?
These two lovebirds are
finally tying the knot.
Congrats, dear fellow.
When's the happy day, what?
We were going to keep it to ourselves
for the present, but you know the ladies.
Oh, do I ever.
Sorry, darling.
Couldn't keep it in.
It's nice to see
you again, madam.
May I add my
congratulations?
Let's dance!
If you don't mind,
Edythe, I have a...
Oh, you drone on, Joey.
Leonard will take me for
a spin, won't you, Lenny?
Be delighted, Edy.
Delysia, Phil, come on.
Of course!
Well, as we have
no conversation,
I have no option but to
ask you for the next dance.
Alas, I can dance
nothing but the waltz.
Are you all right?
- Yes.
Well, to take
another woman's escort...
You didn't take me,
I took you.
I'm sure Edythe can cope.
What happened to that
particularly beautiful scarf
you were wearing
at the fashion show?
What are you
talking about?
Despite your most elegant transformation,
the body is still the same.
Mr. Blomfield.
As are the eyes. Most
fetching, if I may say.
I'm not really sure
you should say.
I'm sorry. Professional
habit. A bad one.
I have to remember you're
not like these people.
Am I terribly
old-fashioned?
Indeed you are.
And all the better for it.
Am I making you
feel uncomfortable?
This is the most comfortable
I've felt all day.
Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome to Nick Calderelli's
Scarlet Peacock.
I'm delighted to introduce you tonight
to a very talented lady friend of mine.
And she can sing, too.
It's my pleasure
to bring you
Delysia Lafosse!
You're too kind, really.
Hello, Michael.
How was prison?
And to get us
in the mood,
we'll start with
Hot Shoe Shimmy.
Change of program.
If I Didn't Care.
If I didn't care
More than words can say
If I didn't care
Would I feel this way?
If this isn't love
Then why do I thrill?
And what makes my head go
'round and 'round
While my heart stands still?
If I didn't care
Would it be the same?
Would my every prayer
begin and end
With just your name?
And would I be sure
that this is love
Beyond compare?
Would all this be true
If I didn't care
For
you?
If I didn't care
Would it be the same?
Would my every prayer
begin and end
With just your name?
And would I be sure
that this is love
Beyond compare?
Would all this be true
If I didn't care
For
you?
Thank you, thank you.
Really.
Well, let's try something a
little more upbeat, shall we?
Ladies and gentlemen,
this is an air raid shelter!
Sir, stay...
- I'm going home.
You don't want to put
your wife in danger.
My wife?
She doesn't know I'm here.
I'm here, Delysia.
- Guinevere, I'm scared.
It's just a drill.
I'm sure it's just a drill.
But it won't always be,
will it?
We're going to war,
aren't we?
Yes, we are.
And that is why you must not waste
a second of this precious life.
Listen to me.
Once, I too
had ambitions.
Not your grand ones.
Simple ambitions.
Marriage, children
and a house of our own.
He died.
In the mud in France.
A good, solid man.
You would call him
dull, no doubt,
but he smiled whenever he saw me,
and we could've built a life on that.
Your heart knows
the truth, Delysia.
Trust it,
for life is short.
Michael?
Michael?
Michael?
Oh!
Delysia!
My God. I...
Nothing for 19 years and
then two in one day, what.
I'm so sorry.
The part's still yours,
darling.
Well, that's all right, Phil.
You enjoy your Hortensia.
In every way.
It's just a drill, ladies and
gentlemen, it's just a drill.
This is the safest
place in London.
Come on, let's have
some drinks on the house.
And some music, please!
Michael?
Michael?
Michael, please wait!
Delysia, you've made your
decision. I hope you'll be happy.
Michael. Please. You have...
Where do you think you're sneaking
off to? The night is young.
You have the rest
of a set to sing.
No, Nick,
I don't think so.
Nobody walks
off my stage.
She said no.
What, and she does
what you say?
Never once, as a matter of
fact, but that's not the point.
The point is she doesn't
want to sing. End of story.
Let's go, Delysia.
No.
I'm warning you,
Calderelli.
You, warning me?
After you, Delysia.
Sock him in the jaw!
What?
I'm a pianist, damn it.
It could ruin me.
Why, you pathetic...
Darling.
This is your fault.
Is the offer still open?
Get up!
Well? Is it a yes
or is it a no?
What?
Will you doggone marry me
or will you doggone not?
Yes. God help me. Yes.
I don't think
I can bear it again.
Did you lose many?
Just one. You?
Almost every
school friend I had.
One tries to forget.
If only one could.
You know, I distracted
myself with ridiculous things,
youth, parties,
lingerie.
I mean, I trained in
socks, for goodness sake.
Socks?
There's a great deal of engineering in
a gentleman's sock, I'll have you know.
Stitching of the heel...
By comparison, designing a
brassiere is a piece of cake.
Not that there
aren't compensations.
None of them
over 20, I imagine.
And all very easy
on the eye.
But you know what?
I'm done with it.
I'm going back
to gentlemen's hosiery.
You know who you are
with an honest pair of socks.
You certainly do.
Told you about Gerry,
has she?
Didn't take you long
to move on, hmm?
Joe?
Hello, Edythe.
Did she also tell you that she hangs
around the soup kitchen at the station?
A tramp masquerading as some
sort of social secretary, my God.
Goodbye,
Mr. Blomfield.
No, actually,
she didn't.
Neither about that,
nor about you and Gerry.
But I'm grateful for
the truth, for a change.
Hello?
Delysia?
Miss Lafosse?
Come on, come on,
the taxi's waiting.
Michael,
don't rush me!
Guinevere! Are you all
right? We've been so worried.
Perfectly well,
thank you.
We've been scouring London for you.
Miss Lafosse...
You have not been at the roulette
wheel all night, have you?
Please, Delysia,
I'm trying to apologize.
I expect you've heard that I am
not a social secretary at all.
I'm afraid I found
myself pretending.
Miss Pettigrew, if that's you
pretending, then you're jolly good at it.
Guinevere,
Sarah Grubb is not going to
judge anybody for pretending.
Come on, Grubb! This is
us, I'm afraid, Miss Pettigrew.
Boat won't wait.
Are you really going?
- Mmm-hmm!
To New York?
- Yep.
How wonderful.
But, Guinevere,
what will you do?
Don't you worry
about me, petal.
Why, Miss Holt is holding a job
for me this very morning, I expect.
I will never forget the day
we spent together.
Not ever.
Nor I.
Oh, goodbye, Guinevere.
I love you.
Off with you. Away.
Oh, come and visit!
New York's bopping!
Forgive the intrusion.
I'm glad to see
you're safe.
Oh, yes. Quite safe.
Am I right in thinking you're no
longer employed, Miss Pettigrew?
Quite correct.
So you're free?
- Quite free.
Might you be looking
for a social secretary?
No. Absolutely not.
Oh.
I'm looking for you.
Me?
I've been looking for you
all night, and, I believe
all of my life.
If you'll have me.
A nod of the head
will do me fine.
And I am, at a stroke,
the happiest man in London.
What a night.
- What a morning.
Have you eaten,
my dear Guinevere?
Oh, Joe,
I have not eaten for
a very, very long time.
Some music, please!