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Monsters Wanted (2013)
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[Fly buzzing] [Splat] - Halloween shtuff. Right there, in the middle of the dirt-- we're paving a bunch of this-- it's going to be the biocontainment tent, which is gonna lead you into the facade city that leads down to where our bus is. That's gonna lead you out into the woods. The feel is to be Louisiana bayou, walking down the docks. Here's the dock. Poor carpenter. I think they have about given him a hemorrhage 'cause this is the most out-of-square thing he's ever built. We've wanted to own our own haunt for years. We've been going to haunted houses since we were both knee-high to a grasshopper. You know, she was scaring kids in the neighborhood at six and building her own haunt in her garage, and we've done--been a home haunter here for a while, and we've--I've been to hundreds of haunted houses all over the country. We love Halloween. It's the only holiday we celebrate. - I was kind of born spooky. The first horror movie I saw-- I was three--was Poltergeist. You know, my parents were like, "oh, you look like the little girl," and, you know, then later on in the night, of course, I was pawing at the TV, "take me, take me." - This town just didn't have anything that struck us as wow, fantastic, kick butt, and so we were like, look, let's turn louisville in. Let's raise the bar on Halloween in louisville. Let's step it up, let's make something fucking fantastic out of it, and let--let's make a theme park. So you come around this side of the tent, come walking in. Here's the ticket window. In front of the ticket window, you are in the center of the theme park. This is your entrance area. So you'll have concession booths. You'll go off that way for zombie city. You go off this way for darkness falls. Hopefully stay a few hours, so everyone feels they get their money's worth. 'Cause if you're not getting your money's worth, it's not worth it, it's not doing it right. - Every time I talk about it, I get excited. [Clears throat] When I let my mind run and think about all the possible complications and how tight we are on budgeting and time and everything, then I start to get stressed out. - So yeah, it's a little scary at this point. It's exciting scary. It's not, like, freak-out scary to me, but it's definitely a little... Nerve-racking. - [Sighs] Are we ready for this? Okay, we can do this. [Laughs] [Listen to the anchorman by ok zombie] - They're coming to get you, Barbara thanks, Johnny, for that update our guy in the field's reporting it's too late there's mass pandemonium here and everything's very strange it seems there are zombies out there eating brains LA LA LA listen to the anchorman he's got some news he'll have you running scared and stayin' tuned LA LA LA listen to the anchorman he's got some news he only wants to say you're kind of screwed we don't have any good news for you it's nothing but gloom and doom this just in, there's relief coming but not too soon LA LA LA listen to the anchorman he's got some news he'll have you running scared and stayin' tuned LA LA LA listen to the anchorman he's got some news he only wants to say you're... [Paintballs shooting] - Uh, we're at paintball asylum, at asylum xtreme sports, uh, the louisville store and the paintball field. We knew, for paintball to exist or for a retail store to exist, it had to be more than just paintball, and that's when we grew the asylum xtreme sports line. And then, I always had, in the back of my mind, I had a notion to do a haunt. - It was actually Kenny and his team who decided to start darkness falls, and they were running it as a fantastic attraction. Darkness falls is now going to be in its fourth year running. Um, it was kind of my crazy-- no, it was your crazy idea, wasn't it? No? No, all right. I'll go ahead and take credit for it. It was kind of my crazy idea to go ahead and expand everything into a haunted theme park. [Dramatic music] Darkness falls is scary, and it's fantastic. And I absolutely did not want that to change. Zombie city is actually gonna be quite a bit more theatrical, um, and unique in a lot of aspects. Uh, it's almost gonna be a little more like a fully immersive play that you walk through. - We came up with trying to do this carnival and do the carnival games, where you can win the pink floofy bear or the Teddy bear that was cut in half and is bleeding and dripping and, you know, try and make it a little eerie and halloweeny but fun. - You guys are getting a lot bigger this year, as far as just number of attractions and stuff. - It's scary, really, for me. - Is it? - I mean-- yeah, I'll be honest. I wish we maybe was only expanding on one haunt this year. I think to double-- to add two haunts to it, um, I mean, I don't want to be negative about it in no way, by no means at all. It's just, it does concern me on how much bigger we're getting so fast. - Welcome to darkness falls. Okay, this is where the crazy clown... - And this was always where we had the-- - who looks like Kenny with a really long chin and some white makeup. - That dude don't look like me. In the past, we had only one slide, which-- - and now we're gonna split them off into-- - now it's double. Yeah, it was doubled. So now, it's like-- - boyfriend, this way. Girlfriend, this way. [Laughter] - Come on, dude! - We're doing industrial sewer pipes. And, like, you've been going into a sewer, industrial wasteland. - So they're inside? - She's got a dad-good point. If we do a drop window there... - Here. - And we do, you know, a trapdoor wall there, one actor can be hitting a couple different scenes, running back in front of here. - Oh, yeah. - We can save an actor. - Because that way, if they don't-- if they get logged up here, whoever's here just drops it and runs. - Yeah. - Dude, that's genius. Let's do that. - So much more effective. I'd worked at two major haunted houses on the east coast, and I was burned out. I got a call from Shawn Wallace. "Hey, I know this guy," you know, "and he's doing this." And I said, "I don't-- I don't really want to deal with the haunts in this area." I've met with some of them, and I don't want to work with them. And, uh, "oh, no, he's new." - The evil dead cabin is basically gonna have a door right here, leading you in off the path. Room two is where we're hoping to build the drop floor, where the floor will drop 3/4 of an inch out from underneath you. [Laughter] - It's gonna be so much fun. It looks like it. - Okay, okay, all right. - I work with dusty at the day care, and I told her I wanted to get involved in different projects because I was really bored. I think she found rich on craigslist or something like that. I'm not even sure. Dusty thought... [Sighs] I don't remember how it came about, but she goes, "you're gonna have to deal with his ego." And I was like, "I don't think he has an ego. I think he has money to back up his shit." [Laughs] Like, I don't think there's an issue here. - Hi, grant, my name's dusty June. I'm one of the stage managers at asylum haunted scream park. You put in an application on our monsters wanted form. - How many days left? - A day and a half till auditions. Uh, opening night, we're at 74 days and-- - you're not counting down or anything? - No, I'm not counting down. I'm just scared shitless. Our whole life savings up in one 12-day period. Um, so yeah, we're-- but we're on track. We're gonna get it open, one way or the other. We got a lot of people helping. We've spent years giving favors to people, and so we're calling 'em in. Everything we can get to try to get this and do it right. Yeah, great. Well, then, we will see you on Saturday. No problem. See you. Bye. I worked 70, 90 hours a week for my day job. You know, it was "salary." You know, I worked 40 to 50 as my required hours, put in more time. I worked weekends for 'em, do whatever I needed to do. And come February, I guess, when we really decided this haunt needs to go up and there was so much to do, well, I stopped working as hard for them. I wasn't working every single weekend anymore, you know, and pulling seven-day weeks. I was gonna go out and work on the haunt on the weekend. But it basically got to a point where I was told to basically give up my haunted house or take a $20,000 pay cut, 'cause he was gonna hire someone else to pick up the slack and do time logs every minute of my day, and I wasn't gonna be able to work at home anymore, which I had been doing for 15 years, just work out of my house. So after that, I was like, "here's my resignation. "Look, I'll give you 60 to 90 days to find someone else, get 'em trained." And I'm like, "I'm just gonna go full-time, being a haunter." You know, I'm getting to the point in my life where I'm 35. It's time for a change. I don't need to spend the next five years in my house, locked up in a closet at my house, you know, working for someone else. I'd rather go out and do something for myself, even if that risks everything I have, and do something I love. - Right now, everything that I own is going into this haunt attraction, and I'm actually starting to contemplate selling things just to continue to fund it, because it's-- we're at the point of no return. - We're gonna do a-- a two-part audition. Dusty and janel are gonna be able to take notes on who seems more creative and outgoing and who can be put in different places in different positions in the haunt, and then we call 'em in, one by one, to do the direct auditions, where they know we're watching them, and we get to be the scary people. - I'm hot. I can't wait till October when it's not hot. I need misters and some guy in a bikini with a grape leaf. [Snakes in the shadows by viva viva] - I got a fever of 110 degrees I'm seeing snakes in the shadows on the long walk home - so I'm gonna pick one of you, and you have to be a zombie while playing duck, duck, goose. - I must be stoned can somebody help me, please? I got a fever of 110 degrees seeing snakes in the trash - [Screaming] - Each night we're open, you're gonna be performing for thousands of guests. - Being swallowed, held by your past hungry for my need - you know, we want people that want to be here, they want to have fun, and they want to scare the hell out of innocent people. - I got a fever of 110 degrees - [Screaming] - Are you scared? - You should be. - Oh! You guys, she's--she's got great eyes. - Mm-hmm. - Obviously. - I enjoy working with somebody else and someone to feed off of. [Screaming] But I can also work independently. - Help me, please I got a fever of 110 degrees - Aah! - As a monster-- pick your monster-- read a nursery rhyme. - [Deep voice] Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as snow. - [Laughs] That was good. - [Growling] I don't know what I was. I just did that. - I'm hearing words whispered in the wind saying, all right, please - Let's do some role play. - Okay. So I'm being stabbed? - You're being stabbed. - Aah! I've been stabbed! Help me, John! - Locked me in here just because I like seeing what's underneath a person. - Come on, get a little closer. Dance with bubba. Show me your dance moves. - Tell the balloons to stop talking to me - The fact they're made so fragile, it's so funny. [Laughs] - What's that on ya? [Sniffs] Mmm. You got some smell good on. What is that? - Help me! I've been stabbed! - [Laughs maniacally] - Mmm. Pop-tarts? Butter? - We've got our own gollum in zombie city. I think it went real well. - We're different. Um, me in particular. I'm--I'm different. I've never been able to really blend into society, so I'm creating my own world, and I'm inviting other outcasts into a world that I'm creating, and we're just gonna be a happy, wacky, weird, creepy, crazy family. Whatever it is that's deep within you that you think is a little weird, that you feel self-conscious about, that you usually hide, we accept that and appreciate that. Like, disabilities are not disabilities. They're special features. Are you weird, different? Do you not fit into society? Do you occasionally have random thoughts about killing people and creating massive fires to wipe out everyone on the planet? Well, yeah. Come on in to our group. [Laughs] - All right, we're rolling. - All right, I got this stupid-ass, imported video camera that I got from these dumb-ass people walking through here. I can't figure how this son of a bitch work. I might even take-- take these vise grips like I did to one of my other victims. - [Whimpering] - And just reach in there, put it on her tongue, and twist and twist and twist and twist till she can't make no more noise. It's like, yeah! I'll just yank it! Hush up! I ain't gonna hear you after a while! Oh, yeah! - What? That was great! [Laughter] - That was exactly what I was picturing. Just random, kind of old stories. That was good. - My name is Pete "chainsaw" madden. - Every chainsaw guy I've ever met is a little whacked out and loves their chainsaw way too much. That's why we love him. - I love my chainsaw. I love my chainsaw. We have so much fun together. [Laughing] Oh, and the blades ain't very sharp either. That's what's best about it. [Laughs] We having so much fun, and it ain't over yet. [Laughs] Yeah! [Laughs] - [Groans] - [Laughs] - [Groaning] - [Laughing] - No! No! No! [Screams] - Can you see that? I'm not giving you no more than that. [Laughs] - [Moans] No! - [Laughs] We're gonna have so much fun later! - [Screaming] - Yes, we are! Oh, it's gonna be so fun! That's my wife Ruby up there. My daughter sitting on the steps, that's Kayla. And my grandson codin. I've been over at the asylum for-- this'll be my fourth year, and all three years I've been over there, I've cut somebody so far. Aah! Aah! - [Screams] - Oh! - I gave a girl stitches last year. When I come out with my chainsaw, I'm within 2 feet of ya, and my chainsaw starts. You know, it's the element of surprise, and then, that chainsaw, you've got it going, and that just blows their minds away. Get that chainsaw fired up when he come in there, and I backed him up against my chain-link fence. [Chainsaw buzzing] He was like, "oh, please stop! "I just shit in my pants. It's running down my legs. Please stop!" [Laughs] I love making little kids cry and scream. Aah! - [Crying] - They say it's bad, but I love it. [Screaming] - [Crying] - If they fall to the ground, I get on top of 'em. Aah! Right in their face. I won't let 'em up. I won't let 'em up. If they're down, they're down. Just the thrill of being in that control, and they're running from you, and-- and you're probably never gonna see 'em again. You could just do whatever you want to 'em. Bring 'em on, 'cause I'll give 'em what they paid for. My grandson, he's looking at it. I don't think he's gonna go this year, so--but he says he's gonna take my chainsaw over when I get old. - What's your name again? - Codin. - And what are you gonna be when you grow up? - A monster. - [Groans] Oh, I give him a scare, every now and then. We're sitting there, watching TV, and I say, "are you afraid of the dark?" [Laughs] - [Whimpering] - [Laughs] Yeah! [Laughs] I'm gonna make you cry now. [Laughs] Maybe not. [Laughs] - I want to make sure that the actors are happy. We can come up with a general concept for them, but I also want to double-check and make sure that that's something that they're gonna be comfortable doing. If we put her in a role where she is an infected zombie and she can do the whole crazy, twitchy thing, I think that that might be something that she'd enjoy. 'Cause I started telling people that I was gonna start giving them a general idea of where we're gonna put them, so they can start working on character development, and we can get their costumes done. - Okay. - I don't even know when I'm gonna find time to do that. - Yep. - Okay. - She--she's perfect in the box as a zombie. That's perfect. - Okay. So then I'm just short the very last guy. - It's 12:46 in the morning, and I have coffee. - How many cups of coffee do you have in a day? - 12. - Really? - Yeah. - And about 128 ounces of Mountain dew. - You need to be involved in this too, 'cause you were at several of the actors'-- - hi, Matt. Not much. How you doing? - Yeah, get the fuck out. [Laughter] - Um, it's a matter of how many people get arrested, yeah. So we ended up officially sponsoring zombie walk in town, which we're actually the country's large-- like, guinness world record largest zombie walk, except they haven't paid the $5,000 to guinness world record to get the world record. He calls me yesterday, he's like, "hey, we're not gonna be able to get our permits," and I said, "so you're saying zombie walk can't go on 'cause you can't afford four more cops?" I said, "let me call you back in a little bit." Made a few phone calls, got four more cops hired up. Um, so the zombie walk's going on this year because luckily I knew some people who knew some people who could get me these cops. I'm in. See you then. Okay, bye. [Indistinct chatter] - I wanted to dye myself green for the second zombie walk, and, uh, so I got a nurse's costume, and I ripped it up and dyed myself completely green, and it was quick and cheap, and I ended up winning "hot zombie." So I'm reprising my role, only less nursey. - We're on bardstown road right now, and it is the 2011 annual zombie walk. - Zombie walk started about six years ago. Three friends, they got together, and they all share the same birthday, and then now it's celebrated August 29th, 8:29 P.M. every year. We're selling some merchandise here. Selling the official zombie attack t-shirt. We've got remote-controlled zombies right here. We have energy drinks. Life-size gummy brains. They are bubble gum-flavored, just like the real thing. You know, everything a growing zombie needs. - I just like the Gore. I've been a Gore fan for a while. - Is that eatable? - I guess. - It is something about zombies. Uh, like, the CDC has actually said that the zombie situation is something that could happen. There's something that's like the overall realisticness of zombies that kind of pulls out everybody. - Well, the zombie walk is basically a night where all the undead creatures can feast upon all of the nice, human flesh, and in that moment, we really feel alive. [Like you by ok zombie] - [Hisses] - Walking around, ignoring the sound head starts to pound and it's over if you want to be something different than me maybe you'll see that it's over you - for seven years now, we've thrown a zombie attack, which basically looks like several thousand people dressed as zombies, running around, acting like goofballs. I printed on little business cards just a hand-drawn map of the highlands with a little arrow that pointed, "attack." And we thought we'd have five or six people, and we got about a hundred that first year, and it has steadily doubled every year. Well, the mayor's office sent out a press release, saying they projected 10,000 to 12,000, which I thought was crazy. But, looking at it, I think they're right. - You want a piece of me and I knew that you'd want me to be like you want a piece of me and I knew that you'd want me to be like you - I love it. It's, like, the best thing of the year. I look forward to it every year. This and Halloween. - Zombie attack has gotten bigger and bigger every year, uh, with more and more concerns from the mayor's office and the city. And they don't want, really, this going on anymore, but they know they can't say no, so they--they kind of drowned us in demands, and if it wasn't for rich and his company, this would not be happening right now. 10,000 people having a great time wouldn't be here. And he does it because he loves it, you know? - You want a piece of me and I knew that you'd want me to be like you want a piece of me and I knew that you'd want me to be like you want a piece of me and I knew... [Indistinct chatter] - It's big business. You know, there are haunted houses around the country that will literally do $1 million, $2 million, $3 million in 30 days, and that's their business. They get that many people who come show up. They get that big of a show, that big of a production, and it's got a lot of money. And then, at the same time, in order to put on a multimillion-dollar show, you gotta buy a lot of stuff. - Hi, rich. - Hi. - Where--where are we? - I'm not sure. I haven't had coffee yet. I think I'm in St. Louis at transworld, which is exciting. I love transworld. It has cool Halloween stuff, so we can figure out whatever people sell that we can make with duct tape cheaper, better, and look cooler. [Dramatic music] - This is the Halloween and attraction show. We have over 500 exhibitors, and we have probably about 7,000 attendees. - So it's a trade show specifically for owners of haunted--haunted houses. There's really only one trade show, and that's this one, so we typically just-- just do this one show. - This is the show of the year. Basically, a lot of our exhibitors write all of their orders at this particular show for one year. - If you--if you look at all the companies, they all kind of specialize in a couple of different things. Either silicone masks, large costumes, animatronics. So you see a wide variety of product, which really offers customers a lot of different options. - This is, uh, one of our new products. It's an attack zombie, and her name is sidewinder Sally. She's--she's ravenous. She is just like... [Growls] - Well, the company is called Gore galore, and we've been in business 14 years, and we like to specialize in giant costumes, giant puppets, and actor-operated animatronics. - There's everything that you could ever want. If you can't find it, it doesn't exist. - I mean, it's not gonna take a beating against the wall repetitively all night. It's got a soft core. - Yeah. - You know, but it's foam, so it's not really gonna hurt. That looks really fuckin' cool. [Tap] - That didn't hurt at all. - I know Halloween itself, the holiday is second to Christmas, and sometimes I wonder how close it is to Christmas, because there's so much, and Halloween's getting bigger and bigger. I don't even know what kind of money is walking around in here today. It's just crazy. It's--it's great. - If you look at the bigger houses, netherworld, erebus-- uh, God, the list goes on-- they have budgets of hundreds of thousands of dollars, so, uh, it varies a lot, but literally, from a couple thousand to hundreds of thousands, if not millions of dollars for those companies, each year in new product. - I got books. I got lots of books. Got lots of books and this is really just walking down one aisle, if that gives you an idea of the size of this convention. - There's people here from Germany, Japan, Puerto Rico, Australia-- all, literally, all over the world, people come to this show. - It is the best show that we run. It is so fun. Everyone loves it. The people, the exhibitors are amazing. The buyers are real enthusiasts and love what they do. - As much as it's all about scaring people, it's still kind of bringing you back to what you were when you were a kid. What scared you, what--what, you know, you thought about at night, and then, you know, it's what you want to give to other people. That's the purpose of the industry. - Without the love, if you're all worried about the money, then it's really hard to create product that people--other people can fall in love with. So, I mean, you have to-- you've got to have a passion for it. I-I wouldn't be the same person without it, so-- I couldn't--I couldn't live without it. - It's not all about the money. It's about the love. But we got 120 people to pay to work it, and almost $200,000 this year, all said and done. It's gonna work. Not a religious guy, but I'll pray. - At the moment, we're working on costumes for our 80-plus actors that we have to find clothes for right now. - Are we officially at 80-plus? - Yes. - Aah! [Laughter] - I can't even see you. - I love the nose. - Wah-wah. [Laughter] - The big piece of today's training class is really about scare tactics. How we're gonna scare. Things we're gonna do to scare. How we're gonna get into, you know, people's heads to scare them. So the first part, we're gonna talk about in that scare tactics stuff is what we call scaring forward. As the scares go on, the purpose is to scare them to the next place. Scare them forward down the show. Scare them farther down the line. - Actor training is actually one of the most important things you could have, because all the bad things that could go wrong, 90% are because the actor doesn't know what they're doing. - What you want to look for is loose-armed, I'm-gonna-punch-you guy. That's the kind of guy who walks through the haunted attraction. He's more in attack stance. His arms are loose. He's, like, ready to-- he's ready to fight. That's the kind of guy that you want to keep your distance from. - Most of our cast has not had any haunt experience, so they have no idea what they're about to face. - They didn't tell me it's going to be eight hours of grueling work. We told you. It's, you know, "oh, I don't like this guy calling me, you know, an idiot." We told you they're going to. Let's work on a response. - If your actors cannot put on a good show, people will never come back. You can have phenomenal sets, and you can have amazing props and prosthetics and makeup and costuming. If that person cannot effectively make a scare, nobody will come back to your show. - We're taking patrons outside of their normal reality, and we're putting them into our reality. We have to make that appear real to them, so that way, the fear appears real to them. - We are the predators. They are the prey. We're gonna kill 'em. They're gonna be killed. When you remember that, anything they say doesn't change the fact that you want to kill 'em. - Some haunted houses throw you in a costume, say, "this is what you have to do for ten hours." That's all you can do. Pushing a button, pushing a button. You want to strangle yourself. - They're gonna get bored. They're not gonna want to say the exact same things 800 million times a night. I encourage creativity 'cause that's kind of what this whole thing is about. It's about being creative and having fun. - We're picking janel to go out to the haunt. My fork was definitely in my mouth when we drove past that cop. - Megan? - Yeah. - How you feeling? - I'm great! - How many days till the haunt opens? - 13. - How much is there to do? - Tons. This much times a billion. I think I passed tired about a week ago. I'm on to a slap-happy, crazy sugar rush to where 5-hour energies kind of just take the edge off a little bit. This is when people start snapping at each other, and nobody's very snappy, which is nice. - I don't--I don't mean to get smart, Dave. All right, well, then don't worry about it. If you want to--if-- ho, ho, ho! The electrician's a motherfucker. - Why? - Well, besides the fact that he does shitty fucking work, and every fucking wire out there is nicked, and I got to go redo all the motherfuckers, I just need to make sure they're safe and they're out there. They're all nicked. "Well, everything--this whole fucking thing for you "has been a motherfucker. I'm not doing another motherfucking thing for you," and hung up on me. [Scoffs] He can go fuck himself. - All right. - [Sighs] - Are we gonna be ready for rehearsal? - Yeah. Are we going to invite other people to our rehearsal? No. I don't remember. They're written down. - Andrew and t.C. - Well, if you go around and start moving actors around, you'll irk me. That's fine. Then-- if you start ordering the actors around, we're going to have a problem. If you have a problem with an actor, then you can come to the stage managers, and they'll take care of it and address it. Okay. How is that gonna work, Joe? Please tell me. And we--you and I are gonna go over here and have another conversation away from everyone else. - Let's go, chief. - Meow. - I tried to politely take it away from you. Fuck you! Go home! Go the fuck home! Come on, come on. Come on. - Are they over there, fighting? - They went to talk to Kenny, I bet. - The exact words were, "whatever I tell an actor to do, they're gonna do." They're paid employees. [Indistinct conversation] - So, guys, what are we all doing here? - [Laughs] Waiting for janel. - Waiting on the drama to resolve. Then we can get some work done. - For one of the other partners, you know, he'd been here since he started. We came into this process a little late, Joe and I, so he has animosity to us. - Joe means--means well. It's just, I think everybody's got a little tension on 'em. Uh, Joe feels like he wasn't--I mean, everybody-- I think it's communication. Uh, those two have had a breakdown in communication a little bit, for a while. - We're out here every day. We've called every friend we know. We've done every favor. We hired people to do the things we can't. And we haven't seem him until a week ago. And now he's trying to come in and take over, and, well, obviously, that irks everyone else on the team. There's always one bad apple in the bunch. You know, one wild card. You don't know what's gonna come out of whose mouth next. Everyone's on the same page and understands what's happening, except for the apple. [Fishing hole by viva viva] - We don't want to go when we get old - I think I need the stress-relieving bobcat. - every day's the same out the window - roughly speaking, we're just behind and screwed, so we're gonna-- we gotta slam it. - Zombies are chasing you down here, and you're like, "aah!" - Every day's the same out the window passing - what's the theory behind how everything's being done? - I'm running out of money. - We don't want to go when we get old - I think we can be done a week after we open. - Rich and janel are the bosses, and I follow them perfectly. - And then a zombie comes over here, and they're like, "bleh," so you're like, "aah!" And then the floor drops, 'cause you guys are, "I'm gonna blow the shit out of these motherfuckers!" Boom! And you're like, unh. Zombie disappears. - I been looking at photographs - I emailed it to you, I emailed it to dusty, I emailed it to Nikki, and I emailed it to April so that-- - I'll go dig back through all the emails to find it right now, when I need it. No problem. Peter Piper's peppers sounds like a kindergarten book. - Yes. And more. It does not. - Tell me it does not. - I know, but we already did it, and we've been doing it for the last hour. - Why do I have a razor blade in my pocket? - I don't know. - I got more wonderful mail. I opened it up. It was a Halloween card. It was nightmare before Christmas. I'm looking at it. Ooh, a bag of lorazepam. Somebody sent me anxiety medicine. And it had a little note in there, "don't go too crazy." - He comes running back in here, opens the door, and you go, "aah!" And you go running out. - I was like, you know, I've never actually had my head shaved before, so fuck it. Might as well. - I'm about to have it all pretty much shaved off, all for the character. - We've been getting home so late at night that I go to the computer, and I start working. I fall asleep at the computer, and then wake up at 7:30, and we're out the door again. - "Tired" implies I get sleep. But sleep? I'm not sure right now. - I'm not a millionaire. I can't afford to put real siding on the houses. I can't afford to buy the fake brick right now. So we're doing what we can. - And the zombie comes over here, closes the door, and resets. That's how it goes. - I didn't get that. Can you do it one more time? [Indistinct chatter] - Okay, makeup's gonna be primary here, secondary here, tertiary here. Boxes are gonna be on this wall, this wall, and under here. - So I was supposed to go get makeup today? - Yeah. - When did you tell me that? - Yesterday. - You said that you were gonna go to horner's and pick up makeup when you went to horner's. - I did? - Yes. - Kaley, we may not have the makeup to do tonight. - I need to be building, but I'm going to do what we have to do tonight with actors. - Which is what? - Semi-practice dress rehearsal, makeup, costume attempt number one. All will be well, somehow. Not sure how yet, but it'll all work. - Aah! - God damn it, Pete! - You knew it was coming. - I did. - Nice. - [Laughs] - He just laughs at you. - It's only me and him in this room alone, and I'm a little bit afraid. I'm a little bit afraid that he's gonna scare the hell out of me. - Because you're not gonna get used to me. [Laughs] - I'm doomed. - Pete, your laughter-- your laughter is like music to my ears. We love Pete. It's like music, music. - [Laughs] - Welcome back to the start of the asylum haunted scream park stop. Our whole season's about to get going, and we all know it's going to be an interestingly wild, hard season. So I wanted to welcome you in again. The point of tonight is, "a," we're gonna get everybody in costume. Dusty and kaley are gonna start hollerin' out people, and we're gonna be walking through the scenes, more or less starting front to back in the haunts, taking you in and working on costumes. - I'm glad we're getting to do this 'cause it'll work all the kinks out, and then we'll get everything streamlined on Wednesday, and I think we'll be good to go on Friday. - I need a cigarette. - I need James, torin, April, and Alex. - Come on, what about me? - No. You're last now. [Kick back by sick of sarah] - I get to work in scrubs, and I didn't have to go to school for it. I'll be in the isolation cage, so yeah, I'm gonna be gross. It's gonna be awesome. - It's not like anything I've ever worn, but I like it. - Turn it over to the flip side looking for your answers your route to crawl and you'll tell all your friends - I will be, what? A commando ninja girl who will shoot you if you've been bitten. - For the kickbacks, ripping on the rejects they call their friends - one has optional pants that match. Do you want a costume? - They ain't gonna be looking. - Okay. - When that chainsaw comes out of the refrigerator, they're done. - I know. - Because they're gonna run right out the door, they're gonna fall down on that ramp, and I'm gonna be right on top of 'em, and I ain't gonna let 'em get off that ramp. - I know. - And it's not a place in time we're just hoping that you'll find - I've done this for 15 years. You need to impress me, okay? Yes, you have to impress the customers, but you have to impress me too, 'cause if not, you won't get candy. Let's walk and put everybody in their seats. You're not a zombie yet. The infect--it's a virus. So you've been infected, but you haven't fully turned, so you're crazy. - Okay, okay. Okay, I might be able to make it work. - You have to use a little bit of imagination here because not quite all of it's done yet. But I'm gonna be in the maze somewhere, going around, being behind the scenes, moving the walls. I will have different wigs, um, and different bits of costume to help solidify the effect of me being different people, which is the reason that this is gone. We're puppets, but I found my strings, and now the strings are cut. Let the symphony begin. - Something we might have left behind - As the groups are coming through, if you start getting backed up, you're going to have to change your scene slightly in order to move people through faster. Kaley, you ready? - Yes! - Take your groups and go! - Just keep walking. - What the hell? - Oh, yeah. I have to pee first, though. - Our rehearsal didn't go well, um, in that I didn't know what we were doing or how we were doing it. Yeah, he keeps hurting himself. Look. He's--he's done that already, and then he did-- - see, the first time I come out-- - he did that the other day. - He hurt himself last time. - So I hit it, and when I hit it, the dumb thing, it come out, and it cut my arm. [Screaming] [Laughs] - Cover this with something, but we need to get you a handle. - No, no, no. You don't need to cover that. I know now. I know the door will slam. - You're not bleeding on customers. - I can if I want to. - No, you cannot. - Yes, I can. - No, it's against health codes. - I can make 'em bleed. - Okay. - [Laughs] - I'm just kidding. Don't you dare. - [Laughs] - So while I was trying to talk to my actors and have them put in place and get ready for me to come around and do it again, most of 'em were just, "okay, I did it," and left. [Overlapping chatter] - Do we stay here? [Chatter] - I don't want to stay here in the dark. - Well, you're gonna be doing it for, like, eight hours a night, aren't you? - Yeah, but I'm gonna have a laser, though. That's some type of light. - You got an iPhone. - We can't even go back... And, like, hang out? - No, you can go back and talk with Greg and Dustin. 'Cause I think you're grouped with them. - Okay, 'cause I don't want to just stand here in the dark. - They're back that way. - This way? - That way, yeah. But you can walk around on the outside. That's what I just did. - I can't do this. [Laughter] [Murmuring] Oh, my God, seriously, no. [Laughter] Not doing this. - Um, like, what happened? - I went over, and I did the walk-through first to check on zombie city, 'cause I was right there. - Yeah. I didn't know what you guys were planning on doing, and then, like, that's why I wanted you to come and help me, 'cause I didn't know what you guys had planned on actually having them do. - Oh, okay. - And so I was like, well, you know-- - I'm sorry. I thought rich was with you guys. - No. I--like, I tried to put them in their scenes, and then I was like, "okay, go ahead and do this, do this," and then they started following us too. And I was like, "well, I can't just leave them in the dark," because there's no lights out there, and--and then krista freaked out and left. - You need to say, "this is your spot. Sit." - Yeah, and I did. Most of 'em did. - [Moaning] - We're having a conversation. - Oh, okay. - Quick, rich. How'd it go? - Fantastic! Fuck. - I think the most disappointing thing was knowing that my actors were underprepared, just because our--our rehearsal had not gone terribly well, and there were some major miscommunications that happened. - There's a bit of 'em on the, uh, stage. - Okay. All right. Oh, that's disgusting. - We're gonna build our asses off with a hammer. [Drilling] - God! - Okay, let's go build us a carnival. [Saw buzzing] - We're at least over halfway done with the frames, which is great. Who knew? Just cut some wood, and you can just build something real quick. I'm known as Shawn of the dead in the community. It's a performance art/freak show. [High-pitched] I'm all pretty. [Normal voice] I'll hammer nails into my face. [Tapping] Power drills. Shove big hooks. [Onlookers scream and groan] - God! - [Clears throat] Most people don't understand. I don't know why. - I should probably wear safety glasses, which I'm not. [Laughs] I'm pretty sure we're not using the sawhorses right, 'cause I've never actually used sawhorses, which I know is actually the safer way to do this. I'm probably doing a whole ton of stuff wrong. Yeah, no, that's not safe. Don't do that. - I had to fix this part. - It was crinkled a little bit? - Yeah. - What do you think it was? - Well, I think that's the rain. - They were supposed to use plastic, and they used this stuff. This stuff lets water permeate it. Wasted time, wasted money. This time of year, I'm reminded about, like, why do I keep doing it? And I keep on telling myself, next year, or whatever's here, if I buy something, it's an investment, and we don't have to hopefully buy as much the following year, but we've always bought more and more. - Yeah. - Credit cards are so maxed out by the time October comes around, you hope November, you can pay 'em off. - [Laughs] - I need you upstairs. She's shopping for scary shit, and this is carnival shit day. Like, carnival shit. How much? - [Clears throat] - I just found Halloween bears. - You can't say, "I don't know." That does not work for me. - [Clears throat] - There's no price. I don't know. [Rock music] - Yeah! - Look at that. What else we got? - You're pretty helpful. - Aw, I don't think I got any ducks. Used for a game. They're bet--they're better than wiffle balls. How about eyeball suckers? [Laughter] It's gonna cost you $3 in games to win one of those. How much did I pay for that? Okay. - They're priceless. - We just rolled two. - Two? - 2,000 so far. - [Laughs, murmuring] - We still have another cart. Down to the wire. - [Sighs] - Yeah. Down to the wire. She's about to have a heart attack. - [Sighs] Here we go. - She just balanced her checkbook and didn't like the answer. Give me a hug. Give me a hug. Come out of the little, blue glowy reflective things. - I'm okay. - Vampires don't sparkle. [Laughs] - You wouldn't do that to the tape. - So $2,306.17. - You guys are cutting it close with the cash. - Um, yeah. Uh... That was my fault. I never should have let rich hold on to 40 grand. I was in charge of half the money, and he was in charge of the other half of the money. And, um, before we were even a quarter of the way into the build, he was already broke. And, uh, that's-- that's why the budget ran quite a bit deeper than it needed to. [Laughs] [Saw buzzing] - What's on your mind? - That there's a lot of shit left to do in 24 hours before the dress rehearsal tomorrow and then even more shit to do in the next 72 hours before the first night. I'm overwhelmed. I can't even comprehend how janel and rich are handling it right now. - [Whistling] - There's somebody that complained to the city council. The city council calls the fire department. The fire department emails my division. My boss emails me. 'Cause I know the competition right now is-- this is--this is my third haunted house today. - Really? It's dirty, man. - Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm not sure who is really behind the barrage of emails I keep getting, but I'm not getting 'em only on you. I'm getting them on southside drive. I'm getting them on strawberry Lane. I'm getting them on, uh, waverly. My goal is to get everybody going. You know, I don't want to be, you know, the opposite going away, you know what I mean? I just--especially if you're trying to make money legally. - Can you tell me what just happened? - Surprise inspector. I'm pretty sure 'cause one of the other haunted houses are complaining about b.S. And so they just have to come look. - Is it a common thing, do you know? - Unfortunately. I got permits for as much as we thought we needed. Apparently, there's more. - Okay, we need to talk about something. - Kenny's of the opinion that we shouldn't do dress rehearsal tomorrow night, and I agree. We're not ready for it. - No, we're not ready for it. - And I don't even think we can get close enough to fake it. - Okay. - But we don't-- I don't have the time-- neither does Kenny-- to stop and deal with actors coming through, nothing. We just--there's no way. Hey, kaley. - You're not having dress rehearsal? - There's no way I can have actors in these while we're putting shit up. I don't even have my air lines running out for the animatronics. - Okay. - It's just not gonna happen. - Mm-hmm. - Much as I really fucking want it and they really fucking need it, it ain't gonna happen. - Okay. Well, all right. [Soft rock music] - How long are your days right now? - Around 20, 22 hours. I got 2 1/2 hours of sleep last night. There's a bunch of people I'm frustrated with... Just 'cause it's like, oh, you're gonna have to do that again. That's not quite what I said. But I wasn't clear, so it's frustration at myself, because I didn't walk them through it and demo it. - I think everybody's excited and at the same time kind of tense that it's, uh-- everything's coming in so close, and there's still a shit ton of work to do. - How tight are you on time at this point? - Very tight. Like, I don't really want to sit here and talk to you. - How worried or scared or excited are you right now? - I don't have an emotion yet, 'cause I'm not gonna stop and think about it. - How is janel holding up? - Kind of like me, except, you know, she doesn't deal with high-pressure situations that don't go according to plan nearly as well as I do. 'Cause if you don't have a plan, you can make it up as you go along, and the plan's perfect. She doesn't believe that philosophy. [Laughs] But the list got thrown out the window a couple weeks ago, so it's kind of more... Fly-by-night at this point. - Is it fair to say you're kind of all-in at this point? - Oh, way more than all-in. Kind of a little beyond all-in. Not a good thing credit card companies exist. It's kind of like, oh, shit. I need more lighting. I need $1,000. - How many--how-- how long left? Do you know the hours? - I can tell you to the second, but I'm not going to. It will just depress me. I hope customers show up. I hope they'll show up. Remember, you're stage managing, so you're packing for 50. - I am packing for 50. [Murmurs] Damn it! This isn't even mine! Mine isn't here. There's enough crap-- ooh, duct tape. I hope to God I don't forget anything, 'cause if I do, I'm fucked. - How can I use these? How can I use these? What can I fucking do with these? I only got one washer. I only got one nut. I can't pull this in. I can't pull that there. How do I get this to push? Shit. I need to drill a hole. I need a drill bit. I need a drill bit. Homemade drill bit. Hmm. That looks like a perfect tool to me. I have some serious concerns. A couple people overslept this morning 'cause we've all worked too hard this week. I don't have my entrance line squared up. I don't know how the hell I'm getting people in yet. It's kind of a problem. We got rain that soaked all of the face masks, every 200 of them. The power amp was left outside. All my controllers and wires were left outside. I'm short s.D. Cards. I'm short... A whole pile of shit. Why the fuck is this in here? [Rock music ringtone] Hello. Okay, done. I'll have it done in a few moments. - All right. All right. - Make sure the carnival has exit signs. If you have another exit sign, put it in zombie hunting. - What time is it? - Quarter till. - Holy fucking shit. Yeah, I need these fire extinguishers first. - All right. - Tell me as soon as they're done. Paint it red, paint it black. Who gives a fuck? And then screw that down, right on top of the wet paint, move on. We got too much shit to deal with. - You think everything is gonna get done? - [Laughs] You're funny. - You told me the damn exit signs were up, and they're not. And I called the damn inspector, and it's the last thing the inspector wants is to come in here, and they're not up. I gotta have 'em now. I don't know where the fire exits are. His phone's up here. You told me an exit sign was up! There's no exit sign up! - I handed those to Matt earlier. - I told you-- I told you, hell, Matt has enough stuff to do. [Sympathy for the devil's little helper by viva viva] - no lie high and dry no lie high and dry no lie high and dry no lie high and dry no lie high and dry - what's this? - Will call window. This goes over the window that leads to the picnic tables under the awning. These two go on the wall. - And how am I supposed to be in charge of this shit? - I don't know. Kenny told me to give it to you. - God damn it. - Yeah, I'll point out where they go. - I got it, honey. - Hey, rich, can you do me a favor and tell Pete to leave me alone? - No. - We've only got a few more hours before it opens, so, um, really, there's way too much work to be done in one day and not enough people, and everybody's frustrated, which isn't helping. Everybody's a little stressed out. - I still have, like, 30 more things to do before we open. Just gotta make sure this fits. - Oh, you gotta be kidding me. - Just gotta hit it with a hammer. - We open in... About an hour and a half or less. - Think so? - Okay, if you do not have your costumes for darkness, come with me. - This is unwashed for three days to give it the proper effect. - Mmm. - It smells so good. - How are things going back here? - Move that this way so that these will come closer. Can we? Right there. Hey, Kenny, can you figure out time warping for me real quick, go back a week? - I know. - I have no air here or power yet. - This box? - Yeah. Slide it under. Slide it under. Yeah, it'll reach. I'll be back in three seconds. Thank you. - What am I doing? [Indistinct chatter] - I-I can't give you a percentage of what the--how much we're gonna be ready and what's not gonna be ready, so... All these dead-looking people around here. Oh, yeah, we're doing a haunted house. - Hey, zombie city, I think we're gonna do a test run. It's just gonna be me and Brian coming through. James, you gonna give me the rules? - Okeydokey. Enter at your own risk. By entering the quarantine zone, you assume all responsibilities for your person and personal possessions. - Rockabye, baby on the treetop when the wind blows the cradle will... - [Growling] - [Laughs] - Hey, hey, hey, howdy. How y'all doing today? Well, I'm the new sheriff in town, just in case y'all were wondering. Well, since I can't find my pa, if you need anything, please just come find me. - [Moans] - Oh, God! Help me! No! Help me! - [Humming] - Ooh, light. I-I remember. I remember sunlight. The sun upon my face, it used to feel good, but now I hate it! - The gods will end the suffering! [Banging] - [Laughing and screaming] - Freeze! Freeze! Don't you move! Don't you move at all! Are you alive? Is anyone here alive? They'll get you, man. The dogs is fucking in there. I'm gonna blow this goddamn place up high. - That's good. Watch your language. - All right, I'll watch the language. - I think they need to work a little harder to keep 'em longer. - Why was no one in the bus? - [Coughs] The actress had to quit. - We didn't have... Enough actors. You know, I thought we were gonna have enough, and the next show, we just didn't. It's like, really, we don't have anyone there? What the hell are we gonna do? - One of our main clowns apparently quit a week ago, and it didn't get passed down to us right. Can you work in this clown town, directing in the tunnel for a little while till I can find someone else? - The barn doesn't have lights. - Huh? - The barn doesn't have lights. Danny put a flashlight in there to hold them over. Matt's on it. - Well, we're working on it, trying to get some 12 volt. - The boys can't get the chainsaw working in the support tunnel. - Well, it's 'cause they fight it. We're got customers coming through. Our first 50 guests have gone through. I'm seriously freaked out and stressed out I have way too much to fucking do. [Indistinct crowd chatter] - Nobody can hear the music. I took a radio out there and they just can't hear it, so I'm trying to bring it closer to the stage. Watch out. Watch out. [Overlapping chatter] - Oh! - Oops! - Oh, crap. - All right. So you want to be on this? - Like this. Check this out. - I don't have a choice right now. - I've got a big speaker. - Oh, you do have one? - Except I need power. - Okay. - Uh, we need two power strips. Uh, I can't have these. I can't have these. - You can't use these? - No, you need that. You all look beautiful. [Music playing] [Mr. incredible by sick of sarah] - pick it up - [Screaming] - Hello, Mr. incredible [Overlapping shouts] Please take off your cape - Bill wouldn't even move. There's this-- - yeah. It's nice finding out what works and what, you know, what's not gonna work. - Yeah. - Well, we don't really have power in zombie city, which is one thing. Like, our lighting over there is just cars with, uh, emergency blinkers on, obviously. But we have had the problem with the air compressor over here freezing up, which cuts out our animatronics, which make them go, and the one that's supposed to be getting electrocuted, going, "aah," he just goes... - Shit's still not right. I'm short on lights and I can't get enough. - With the lights on fuck you, Mr. incredible - Tonight is fix-it night. Figure out what's wrong and we fix it tomorrow. Yo, my entire job tonight has been saying, "hold out until tomorrow. It'll get better." - Like, there's a list of stuff that needs to be fixed, on top of the lighting and everything. - Hmm? - Out where? - Yeah, out where? - Where? - In darkness? - There's no one from... [Overlapping chatter] - We had one actor. He had been going up to all the other actors and saying, "I think it's stupid "that we're not getting enough breaks. Come with me." So some of the shit that got stirred up later that got blamed on me was really because this guy had been going around and telling people to go, and they didn't know that he wasn't a point of authority and just went. - We're having a few challenges with actors in darkness. - I know. - I've really got to have either everybody in makeup at 7:45, or I need everybody at the back patio for a little bit, and we need to go over some shit and squash it tomorrow. - All right. - We need to rah-rah 'em and work on that. - Yeah, I know. - And fix the scenery problem. - How has your first night been so far? - I'm having fun. It's chaos, but I'm having fun. - I know. - Oh, wow. - Kaley. Uh, he, uh--we talked about this earlier today. - It was with rich. - Oh, oh, okay. - And then, uh, he came up here earlier today. He's from Arkansas. He's worked several haunts in Arkansas. We found out where we want him at. - Kenny comes up with the guy Rick, and he's like, "hey, uh, this guy called me this morning. Uh, he's gonna be in clown town." And I'm like, "oh, cool. "I'll go show him where he needs to go. "I'll just go ahead and take him now, and then we'll get him into makeup." Because it was already almost ten after 6:00. So I started to walk away, and Joe is like, "hey, I want to talk to you for a minute." I'm like, "that's fine. "I'm gonna take this guy down. I'll be back in a minute. And then, uh, you know, we'll talk." He's like, "kaley, I want to talk to you for a minute." I said, "that's fine. I'm gonna take this guy down. I'll be back in a minute." And he got pissed off. - I can't handle the drama. - Wait. Which drama in particular are you talking about? - There's a lot. - [Sighs] Joe versus kaley. He was threatening to fire her. - All right. - So I just-- I need to know. - No, I mean--I mean, Joe-- Joe doesn't have the power to fire anybody, but he just wants the respect out of it, and I understand that. If Joe was right here, I'd say the same thing. He's getting his feelings hurt too much when there's a lot of people got a lot of things going on. - Yeah, I'm concerned, because it's a fucking Joe-sized Thorn in my side, and it's stressing janel out, and it's stressing rich out, and it's stressing Kenny out, and everybody, it's like, going down the line. Like, one of my actors just told me that everybody's walking around, like, angry and upset. I don't want my actors to see that. They don't need to be stressed out by proxy, so yeah, it's infuriating. - I had her sit down because-- - kaley said that's just fine. - If she's sitting in the light at the table, then they think she's a mannequin at first, and then, when she says something, it gets more of a scare than when she was trying to pop out at 'em. 'Cause popping out wasn't working at all. Okay. - How do you think kaley handled the Joe situation? - As far as I know, she proved herself. She proved herself that she was capable of handling all the things that Joe had an issue with. And it shut him up. - I'm just saying this. I'm just saying... - Just imagine the biggest fan you've ever seen and the biggest load of shit hitting it in waves. [Laughs] Yeah. That. That too. [Upbeat music] - get up every morning when the rooster crows where I've been or what I've done I don't really know but I don't, oh - hi, guys! Welcome to hell's kitchen! [Laughs] - Take your two-bit sense and keep on walkin' - Where are you going? Don't leave me! [Chainsaw buzzing] - Tonight was so much better than last night. - They were falling down, tripping, running, screaming like little girls. We finally figured it out. [Laughs] - Just take your two-bit sense and keep on walkin' [metallic clatter] [Laughter] - What went really well is we opened without any major events from the customers' point of view. 'Cause I really don't care about the whole Joe thing. It sucks, but at the end of the day, the customers don't know. Joe called Kenny and basically quit and said he's done with this, and he'll help Kenny finish out the season, 'cause he doesn't want to leave him hanging, 'cause they've known each other a long time, so I don't know at this point if he's coming next weekend or not. I'm kind of hoping he doesn't. Don't really care. Stay away from me. - Are you where you thought you'd be at this point with the two haunts? You know, where are you right now? - I don't know. I think I'm at home. [Laughter] Where are we, tico? We're not in Kansas anymore. - You're always gonna hit that burnout phase, doing this job. It's so hard. But ultimately--um, I know a lot of haunted houses are like this. We're a family. - Sometimes there may be interpersonal issues. But when you threaten, or get--uh, get-- one of ours gets into trouble, we're there. - [Laughs] [Electronic feedback, muffled talking] [Laughing] Hi, doll face. Dance? [Laughs] - We've got these guys right here. They're drop panels, so they actually fall down, and actors can pop out. [Growls] You can do anything, really, like that. This is really old school. It's probably the most old-school trick we have in the book. This specter we've got right here is on a pulley system, so these are very... 1970s haunted house. - I met my soon-to-be ex-wife down here, and she made me choose here or the morgue. I was 22. I was young. I was stupid, and I chose her. I'm getting divorced this year, and after eight years, I'm finally back where I belong. - The haunted house is actually part of the reason that myself and rig are together, and, uh, actually just recently got engaged. This place has killed several relationships for me, but, uh, I finally someone-- somebody else that's as passionate about this place as I am. [Overlapping chatter] - We're gonna have an 8:00 or 8:05 cast call. We've got a reviewer already sitting here waiting. Ohio valley haunts is already on the property to go through shortly after 8:00. I'm doing everything I can do up to then. - Did you set up any audio in clown city yet? - Some. I have one of the cd players, but not the cables to plug into that amp. That's what I've been working on. I've been trying to get everything else, much less fix the blue tarp, fix the fence so it doesn't fall down. I'm--I'm trying. - We already have reviewers. Um, they're gonna be the first people in. You guys were fucking fantastic for devil's attic last night. All I heard was compliments, compliments, compliments, compliments. They could not believe how on-point you were for it being 2:00 in the morning. You need to be that on-point tonight. Can I get, like, a "hell yeah"? All: Hell yeah! - Aah! - All right. Go be zombies. - Whoo! - How important are reviews? - Huge. Most haunted houses are built on word of mouth and what people read on the web. So the reality of it is, is, you can slap a $50,000 billboard up and, you know, for six months, if somebody says your haunt sucks, people aren't gonna come out. - So tonight's a big night. - Tonight's a big night. [Midnight by the willbillies] - So this is your mechanism that actually makes you fly, and it goes along with this. So you go... I guess nobody expects it, and once they realize it's a real person, they're like, "you've got the coolest show ever!" I just want to be, like, "I know, 'cause I rock." Aah! - When I point at you, you say, "darkness falls. "You'll be afraid, but that's not all. You'll piss your pants in..." - Darkness falls. - "You'll be afraid, but that's not all. You'll piss your pants in..." - Darkness falls! - Whose forest is it? - My forest! - Whose forest is it? - My forest! - Go kick some fucking ass! [Overlapping howls] - After midnight - [screaming] - when the smoke's on the water and the fireflies are glowing you will do right by me - [Screaming] - By the moonlight you will pay your penance for the things you do - y'all ready to see a show? - Yeah! - Do right by me - oh, my God. - Oh, God. - Ah! - [Screams] - I didn't have my personal staple gun that I use, um, so I used one of their industrial ones. This is my friend, my industrial staple gun. If you have ever wanted to staple somebody, this is the time. [Gun clicks] [Groans] - Whoo! - Right here. [Gun clicks] - [Groans] - Oh! - I pulled it out. [Laughs] - Oh, my lord. - [Groans] - Ohh! - Ahh! - Oh! All I see is everybody's faces go... [Gasps] And I was like, what? And I was like, oh! [Overlapping chatter] I started my period. - After midnight when the smoke's on the water and the fireflies are glowing you will do right by me - [Screaming] - By the moonlight you will pay your penance for the things you've done you will do right by me - What happened? - The chainsaw guy accidentally clocked her in the temple. It's gonna be concussion number two this year. And this now makes 14 years straight Pete has hurt somebody. - And the thing is, she felt bad and didn't want to leave the scene, so she kept trying to fight through it. - She was like, "I ran into Pete's chainsaw." [Chainsaw buzzing] - [Screams] - We're at haunted hotel, uh, the longest haunt in louisville for 21 years, and I've been here for 11. We don't go from movies. We don't use themes like that at all. Ours comes from our own wicked thinking of all our employees. [Rock music] [Chainsaw buzzing] If you're not bleeding or passed out, I'm not letting you out, and that's the rule. I mean, if you're scared or crying, I tell them, "go harder," and they usually do anyway. [Chainsaw buzzing] Yeah, there's a wall of tally marks... [Laughs] Of people who pee their pants. We had 176 one year, and then that was--also, it was 16 ambulance rides. Can somebody please check on that? - [Indistinct response] - Do we need an ambulance? - Unfortunately not. - Darn. Well, we don't need an ambulance, so I guess that's good news. But anyone who's ever been here knows that this is the intense we-might- actually-cut-you haunted house, and that's why they come back. - We really do want to kill you. That's our thing. We are mental in the head. We're the best in the industry. We want to kill you when you come in. We want to make you feel that fear right before you die, you see what I'm saying? - There's nothing like a little kid screaming and crying in your face. You just holler louder. - I used to come here when I was a little kid. - Really? - Yeah. So I always wanted to work here. - Definitely, haunted hotel's a tradition. Um, like I had a couple go through last night, and 16 years ago, this was their first date. So that means something, you know? Those are the stories that we like to hear. It just kind of turned into family. Everybody comes back year after year, and we stick together, and that's why it is the haunted hotel. It's not based on what we build or what we decorate with. It's based on the people. - Perfect. - How are you doing, sweetie? - I missed you, petey. I wanted to stay so bad. Like, I was almo--I was crying 'cause I didn't want to leave, I wanted to stay. But they wouldn't let me, 'cause I was passing out, bleeding from my ear a little bit. I've learned to keep my distance, though, from Pete. No more chainsaws to the dome. - I catch janel every once in a while, sitting in the middle of the city, going, "it came true. "It--it--it's a real world. I have my own world. "It came out of my head "and it went into the middle of people. There's people acting in it." - It is kind of cool. It's alive, and it's growing it, and changing and expanding on it, so it's-- it's really, really cool. I kind of feel like God, creeping through. Yeah, I'm starting to feel-- yeah, I guess more relaxed, more accepting that it's here. Uh, I don't know. I'm also really stressed out because we're--we're broke. We're, like, flat broke. We have no money at all. And I'm not gonna make back my investment this year. Our electric was shut off, and, uh, our water is about to be turned off. Yeah, I went home and I put on my renaissance gown and I walked around with a candle. - Nice. - It's very medieval. [Laughs] It's really, do we need groceries or do we need a 20-foot fireball, you know? - 20-foot fireball! We wanted something unique that was gonna spawn lookers. More reasons for people to come-- "what the hell was that?"-- and come over this way. - [Laughs] - It's beautiful! - Whoo! - It's pretty badass. - So we thought it would be cool. We've got 20-foot fireballs. Eh-eh-eh! We've knocked out most of the kinks. It's time to play now. - [Groans] - [Laughs] - Aah! - Oh, God! - Aah! [Laughs] Aah! [Rock music] - Zombie city has received a ten from some of the reviewers. It's unheard of. It is absolutely unheard of. Getting a ten, it doesn't happen. - They call mabel crazy! That guy, right over there, you can see him going, "boo!" [If you really want it by viva viva] - 'Cause if you really want it you don't need to ask why - I rarely do this, but I decided I'd do this one time this season, and you all get to see it, okay? Are y'all ready? All: Yeah! [Cheers and screams] - Like a light - yeah! - Get out! [Cheers and screams] - This is usually where I take shots. I can't take a shot here. [Laughs] - Killing people is fun. Did you know that killing people brings joy and excitement to the world? I like stabbing people and ripping their hearts out, and then I feed their heart to their friends. - Come on, bop me. Bop me. [Taps] Oh, yes! - Scooping up the field mice and boppin' 'em on the head! - Everyone's having fun. That was the point. And janel looks sexy as an evil bunny. Can you go be a bunny with a circular saw? - Do you want to help me kill people? Because the person that used to help me kill people, I killed them. - 'Cause if you really want it you don't need to ask why - It's so busy. Apparently, we've got, like, 1,500 people in line or something like that. - Last year, we was that busy, but that's just one line. Now, this year, we're busy here, we're busy over there, we're busy right here. The porta-pots are even busy. - Just because it's funny, turn around and wave to the people way back there! Hi! [Overlapping screams] - It perfectly ran when I started the year. - Oh, my God. - Rubbing the wall and cutting people's feet. - It's the last night. - Don't remind me. You're gonna make me sad. - Has it been that awesome, that-- - yes. Yes, it has. - But it's been so not awesome sometimes. - Yeah, but the not-awesome parts are the funnest. - Um, I'm happy it's over. I've got my weekends free again. But it was so much fun, I don't want it to end. - Damn. Gotta wait another whole year for this shit. Hope we start earlier next year. [Laughter] - What do you think about being a zombie? - [Moans] - Is it killer? - [Groans] - [Laughs] I love you so much. She's shy. She really is. She came a long way to do this, she really did. She's--she's sick all the time, and she came a really long way outside of herself, as a little person, to do it, 'cause she's, like, super shy. Tonight's a sad night. We're not gonna see our family for a long time, and it's gonna suck. I'm probably gonna go home tomorrow and lay down and cry for a while. I know janel is. It's breaking janel's heart. She's--I've watched her, like, six times this morning already, tear up so bad, without saying words. She's, like, she feels like she's this mama of this huge project, and she was like she's liberated and freed people, just giving 'em something to do outside of the norm, you know, because this is where it's an outlet. It's family. Mwah! - Uhh! - Ow! - I love you guys, and it's been fun, but it can't last forever. - We made it through with only two concussions, and it was a little emotional of a night, but it was cool. Our little family had grown up and was walking on its own. - I've had many people, um, tell me that they really felt like it changed their life, and it makes me feel good that it was-- it was larger project. It wasn't just business. - I'm gonna be sad that I don't hear Nick saying, "that's not good," and Christina's stick and Nina's scream and Barry's growl and... You guys are great. Thanks. - We love you, dusty. - I love you too. - You know, dusty, I want to say, you know, it wouldn't be right if we didn't, you know, haze you. Get her! [Overlapping shouts] - Aah! Aah! - These haunts, they're nothing without you guys, so out of everything, from the bottom of our hearts, without you, this wouldn't exist. So we love you. [Cheering] - Oh, let's give them one hell of a round of applause. - Thank you! - 'Cause they deserve it. [Cheers and applause] - That community that we've built, it's a little bit dysfunctional, 'cause we're all a little screwed up in the head. But at the same point, you know, I've got lifelong friends, whether they came back to the haunt next year or not, 'cause there's-- there's some people who don't know that they're gonna come back. - This is like a second dad, in a really weird, twisted way. This is like my best friend. - Aw! That's all right. We'll make it. - I'm gonna cry. Don't make me cry. [Overlapping chatter] - Uh, yes. I'm gonna bawl my little eyeballs out. - I felt like I finally had this huge family, and it was all over. You know, not that we were never gonna see them again, but the whole ritual of being together every weekend and the chaos that we conquered and all the challenges that we overcame every weekend was now ending, so, I mean, it was-- it was a little overwhelming. You know, I still kind of feel that way. I had planned on setting aside enough money for us to survive several months before we found something else to create income, because I knew that the first year, we weren't gonna make money back. But when it came down to the line, we just went out and bought what we needed, and we ran through that reserve budget, so we're really broke. - I think we both learned some lessons about how to do this next year together, in that, you know, who's allowed to do budgeting and who's allowed to do buying, but... Guess I'm pretty good at spending. I have to go to this job interview now. - Hi. Okay. - I love you. - I love you. The financial situation, uh, definitely, uh, makes me a little leery about my decisions. But... Life is short. You know, live it. Do what you love. - The average person is not passionate about anything. They don't have that same passion and love. They get up, they go to their job, and then they want to go party for the weekend and get away from their life. If I've got to start lots of different things, if I've got to go out on a limb and risk everything to try and make it work, I'm gonna do it. The worst thing that could happen is, I fail and I lose everything. I can start over and do it again. It's not like we've done it. It's...We're doing it. It's been different. It's been fun. Been worth every bit of it. I'll never regret it. Just can't wait to do it again. [First time I saw her by viva viva] - every now and then I think about the times when I was younger I had a hunger to do something brave and bold and leave 'em all in the dust but everything trusted rusted in the rain now I'm never gonna see things the same way again and I see oh, I see oh, I see waiting at the bus stop, sucking on cough drops smoking too much and now I cough a lot don't give it a second thought if I would live the life I've got who cares about all the shitty thoughts in the way? fuck it well, I paid a little visit to my hometown everything was ripped out and eased out of the ground I was homesick when I was home I'm never going home again well, don't try too hard you look like a phony you sound like a phony it's a bunch of baloney hey, it comes and goes away there's no pleasure without pain and everything I trusted rusted in the rain now I'm way too old to care and too young to complain and I see I'll take you anywhere you want to go and I see I'll take you anywhere you want to go yeah, yeah yeah yeah and I see I'm never going home again - Everybody get the fuck out. |
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