|
My Cousin Vinny (1992)
- Here's some for 37 cents.|- Here's some for 32.
- That's it. Don't they have any generics?|- I think this is the generic. I never heard of that brand.|Maybe we shouId get this. You're paying for advertising. - Tuna. We shouId get tuna.|- PIease, no more tuna. - It's got protein. We need protein.|- Beans are protein. - Beans make you fart.|- We got a convertibIe. I'm gettin' it for myseIf. One burrito and one Iarge SIush. - 21 doIIars and 67 cents.|- Can you fiII this up? Jesus! Look, I forgot to pay for this. You couId have gotten caught.|What if somebody saw? You know what the minimum age|for execution is in AIabama? - About sixteen?|- Ten. - There's a cop behind us.|- A cop? - There's nothing to worry about, aII right?|- There might be. Just reIax. PIease. - Is he stiII there?|- Yeah. - Goddamn it!|- CaIm down, aII right? There's a cop behind us, that's aII.|There's no probIem. - Uh-oh.|- What? - His Iight's on.|- Fuck! Fuck! Goddamn it. - What are we gonna do?|- It's probabIy nothing. It might be a taiIIight. - We don't have any money for baiI!|- BaiI? Nothing's happened. - Nothing? You stoIe something, didn't you?|- Shut up. AII right? (siren) AII right. Here he comes. - Show me your hands!|- Jesus. Show me your hands. Get 'em up! Get 'em up! Up! Now put your hands on top of your head|and get outta the car. - Outta the car!|- Go. (man) Yeah, I'm sure of it.|It's number three and five. RidicuIous. AII this over a can of tuna. (over PA) Keep quiet! (man) Yeah. Uh-huh. You sure about that? Yeah. He's standing right here. AII right. Bye. I think we may get a confession. - I just heard someone shot Jimmy WiIIis.|- He's dead. Oh, my God! Who wouId do such a thing? - HeIIo, BiII. I'm Sheriff FarIey.|- Hi. - Do you know why you're here?|- Yeah, I do. I'm sorry. It was a stupid thing to do. - Have you been made aware of your rights?|- Yes. - You're wiIIing to waive that right?|- I'II cooperate fuIIy. I'II sign a statement, or whatever|makes this whoIe thing easier. Good. Good. That's good. But I want you to know,|Stan, he had nothing to do with it. Did he heIp you pIan it? No. I mean... I mean, it wasn't pIanned out. You know, itjust happened. Did Stan try to stop you at any time? No. I mean, he was... - Is that a big deaI?|- Aidin' and abettin'. - Aiding and abetting? Is that a major thing?|- Oh, yeah. Yeah! An accessory?|Are you guys kiddin'? An accessory? I didn't heIp. I didn't pIan it. You didn't try to stop it. I didn't know it was happening.|I found out Iater in the car. Why didn't you get out,|caII the poIice then? He's my friend. WeII! Your friend has put you in a Iot of troubIe. What's gonna happen to BiII? Nothing. UnIess he's convicted. If he is, we're gonna run enough eIectricity|through him to Iight up Birmingham. We were friends at NYU, and we both|appIied and we got schoIarships to UCLA. So we figured the scenery wouId be|nicer going through the South. - What about the tuna fish?|- I forgot about the tuna fish. And then we Ieft. Did he catch you with the tuna fish?|Is that how it started? - No, he didn't say anything.|- But he knew about it. I don't know. Let's taIk about that for a moment. You paid for the groceries. - And then what?|- We went out to the car, and that's it. When'd you shoot him? - What?|- At what point did you shoot the cIerk? - I shot the cIerk?|- Yes. When did you shoot him? - I shot the cIerk?|- Hey, we need ya out here. I'm in the middIe of a damn confession here! Whoa! Wait a minute! - What's the matter?|- Do you know what this is aII about? - Yeah, they're fucking with us.|- You don't beIieve them? - They don't execute for shopIifting.|- You think we're booked for shopIifting? No. You're being booked for shopIifting.|I'm booked for accessory to shopIifting. No, Stan. I'm being booked for murder and|you're being booked for accessory to murder. It's time to make your phone caIIs. - Goddamn it!|- CouId you contact your parents? How? CaII the ChiIean consuIate?|What can they do? Send a guide into the mountains|Iooking for them? We need to caII an attorney. A great attorney. Do you know any great attorneys? No. I'm caIIing my mother. HeIIo, Ma. We're in Wazoo. It's in Beechum County, AIabama, Ma. Not too good, Ma. We... we've been arrested. Ma. Ma, pIease. Ma, pIease.|First of aII, we didn't do it, aII right? Murder. Ma. Ma, pIe...! Ma, it's a mistake. We must Iook Iike the guys who did it. - TeII her what we think is happening...|- Shut up. We think they're trying to set us up as|patsies. You know how corrupt it is here. The KIan's here, they're inbred,|they sIeep with their sisters. - Some of them do.|- AII right, Ma, Iisten. We gotta get an attorney,|and it's gonna cost a Iot of money. - How much wouId an attorney cost?|- A decent one? $50,000. $100,000. - Can we use any attorney?|- I think so. He says he thinks so. Oh, he is? WeII, that's a great idea.|You think he'II do it? - We got an attorney in the famiIy.|- Who? My cousin Vinny. (tyres screech) (# ''Mind Your Own Business''|by Clivilles & Cole blares from car) What is that? Where's he from? (car engine clanks) (turns music off) - What?|- You stick out Iike a sore thumb around here. - Me? What about you?|- I fit in better than you. - At Ieast I'm wearin' cowboy boots.|- Oh, yeah. You bIend(!) I bet the Chinese food here is terribIe. - I don't see anything.|- The wheeIs went out of baIance... - ..right after we hit that mud.|- No, that's not it. I think you shouId put it|on a rack and take a Iook. What's wrong? - What?|- What's the probIem? The car was shimmying on the highway. - You got mud in your tyres.|- I got mud in my tyres? Let me ask you, how do you|get mud into the tyres? That's a figure of speech.|The mud gets around the inside of the wheeI. - Throws the baIance off.|- Did you ever hear that? Mud in the tyres? No. She never heard it.|She knows everything about cars. See, down here, everybody gets stuck|in the mud every now and then. - Yeah. We're famous for our mud.|- Famous for your mud? How's your Chinese food? You keep on askin' about that. Can't you|teII they don't have Chinese restaurants? Gotta Iet everybody know|you're a tourist. Come on. And you're a fuckin' worId traveIIer(?) OurjaiI was condemned this morning. That's why we bringin' you aII|out to the state corrections faciIity. UnIock the gate! Go on through. (prisoners cheer and whistle) - Do you know what happens in these pIaces?|- Yeah, I know what happens. There's often a big guy named|Bubba no one wiII tangIe with. He'II protect you - if you become|his sex sIave and do whatever he wants. There's onIy the two of us here. What about those cots?|What if they put somebody eIse in here? Stan. - Shut up.|- OK. - (door slams)|- (man) I can't beIieve my Iuck! (whooping) Here. We got somebody for you. You must be Stan. How you doin'? Why'd they bring you in here? I just got in. I asked for the new guys|and they brought me here. Hey, he's sIeepin', huh? Cute IittIe guy. You know, maybe I'II just start with you.|Let him sIeep a IittIe bit. - Look, I don't wanna do this.|- Hey, I don't bIame you. If I was in your situation,|I'd wanna get through this whoIe thing... ..as quickIy and with|as IittIe pain as possibIe. So Iet's try our best to make it|a simpIe in-and-out procedure. What's the matter? ReIax, reIax. ReIax. Maybe we shouId spend|a coupIe of minutes together. You know, to get acquainted before we,|uh... you know, before we get to it. - What's wrong with you?|- I don't wanna do this. I understand, but what are your aIternatives? My aIternatives? To what? To you? I dunno. Suicide. Death. Look, it's either me or them.|You're gettin' fucked, one way or the other. Hey, hey, hey. Lighten up, OK?|Don't worry, I'm gonna heIp you. Gee, thanks. Excuse me, but I think a modicum of|gratitude wouId not be outta Iine here. - You think I shouId be gratefuI?|- Yeah. I mean it's your ass, not mine. I think you shouId be gratefuI. I think|you shouId be down on your fuckin' knees. I didn't know your visit was such an honour. I'm doin' a favour.|You're gettin' me for nothin', you IittIe fuck. Boy, that's one heII of an ego you've got. What the fuck is your probIem? - I did not come here just to getjerked off.|- No. No, no. I'm notjerking you off.|I'm not doing anything. You're on your own. I'm just|takin' care of SIeeping Beauty. - Hey! BiIIy.|- Back off. - Vinny! Hey, Vinny!|- Vinny? - Vinny Bag o' Donuts! How are you?|- This is Vinny? I don't know where to start. Have you had any murder cases before? - None. This'II be my first.|- Your first? Yeah. What kind of cases have you had?|AssauIt and battery? Armed robbery? No. WeII, I expect he's done burgIary,|grand theft auto, drugs. No. Nothin' Iike that either. What kind... what kind of Iaw|do you practise? WeII, up tiII now, uh... personaI injury. WeII... you're a triaI attorney, right?|I mean, personaI injury triaIs. WeII, actuaIIy, this'II be my first|foray into the triaI process. I haven't had to go to court yet.|Knock on wood. You haven't had to go to court yet. - How Iong you been practising?|- AImost six weeks. But... You graduated six years ago.|What have you been doin'? Studyin', for the bar. - Six years?|- Mm-hm. - That's a Iot of studying.|- WeII, to be honest with you,... ..I, uh... I didn't pass my first time out. - That's OK. You passed the second time?|- I'm afraid not. - Three times a charm?|- Not for me it isn't. No. For me, six times was a charm. Six times. (man clears throat) - A IittIe informaI, aren't we?|- I was resting... - Not wearing a coat or tie.|- Oh. Sorry. WeII, approving an attorney from|out of state is a pretty informaI matter. - I just have a few questions.|- OK. Fire away, Judge. - Where'd you go to Iaw schooI?|- BrookIyn Academy of Law. - Is that an accredited Iaw schooI?|- Uh... Oh. Yes. - How Iong you been practising?|- Ooh, about six, uh... AImost sixteen years. - Any murder cases?|- Quite a few. Yes. What was the outcome? Um, you know. Win some, Iose some. This is not the forum to be cavaIier. Oh, of course. Now, Iet me see. Most recentIy, I had a axe murder... ..which I won, on the grounds|of temporary insanity. - Wanna hear the facts of the case?|- No. - What eIse?|- Let me see. What eIse? You ever heard of the Son of Sam? The feIIa who received|orders to kiII from a dog? - That one.|- You defended him? WeII, no, not exactIy.|I defended the first guy they arrested. And, uh, he was found|innocent and set free... ..and, uh... they caught the reaI guy. WeII. We don't have any seriaI kiIIers|in Beechum County. What we do have is as sophisticated ajustice|system as they do in the rest of the country. - I'm sure.|- You being from New York an' aII... ..might have the impression that Iaw is|practised with a degree of informaIity here. - It isn't.|- Right. I teII you this because I want you|to know that when it comes to procedure,... ..I'm not a patient man. Sir, when you come into my courtroom,|you ought to know the Ietter of the Iaw. - I'II react harshIy when you don't.|- You shouId. Being from New York|won't get you speciaI treatment. It shouIdn't. You won't. You'II be given|no Ieeway whatsoever. (judge clears throat) I expect you to know this information|when you come into my courtroom. Right. - You wiIIing to accept those terms?|- Right. No probIem. Just this? (# ''Stand by Your Man''|by Gail Lopata Lennon on radio) This is gonna be great. Vinny's first case. So? What can I do to heIp? - Nothin'?|- No. (cock crows) (whistle blares) What the fuck is that? (# ''Are You Really Mine'' by Jimmie Rodgers) Wanna sit at the counter? Hey. How ya doin'? Listen, what's the story with this|incredibIy, remarkabIy Ioud whistIe... ..at 5.30 in the morning? It's the steam whistIe. Over at the sawmiII. TeII foIks it's time to get up. You can hear it for miIes. - Y'aII want somethin'?|- Yeah. - Breakfast?|- You think? Good choice. Two. Excuse me. You guys down here hear about the ongoing|choIesteroI probIem in the country? - What's this over here?|- You never heard of grits? Sure. Sure, I heard of grits. I just actuaIIy never seen a grit before. - Honey, you gonna try it?|- You first. - What is a grit, anyways?|- It's made out of corn. - Them hominy grits.|- Hominy. Hm. - How d'you cook it?|- Simmer it in water for 15 or 20 minutes,... ..put it on the pIate and add butter. So? You gonna eat it or not? (girlfriend giggles) Here? - Is your attorney here?|- I am the attorney. Oh. Jim Trotter the Third.|District attorney of Beechum County. Vincent La Guardia Gambini. First. BrookIyn. Nice to see you. Yeah. - Vinny.|- Hey. AII rise for His Honour|Judge ChamberIain HaIIer. The court of Beechum County|is now in session. Be seated. First case. The people of the State|of Alabama versus William Robert Gambini... ..and Stanley Marcus Rothenstein. - ''Steen.'' She caIIed me ''Stine''.|- Just... CounseIIor, your cIients are charged with|first-degree murder. How do they pIead? - Your Honour, my cIients...|- Don't taIk to me sitting in that chair. - But he toId me to sit here.|- When you address this court, you wiII rise... ..and speak to me in a cIear, inteIIigibIe voice. - Sorry. My cIients...|- What are you wearin'? Huh? - What are you wearin'?|- I'm, uh, wearin', uh... cIothes. I don't get the question. When you come into my court|Iooking Iike you do,... ..you not onIy insuIt me,|but you insuIt the integrity of this court. I apoIogise, sir, but this is how I dress. Next time you come into my courtroom,|you wiII Iook Iawyer-Iy. I mean, you comb your hair|and wear a suit and tie. And that suit better be made|outta some kind of... cIoth. - You understand me?|- Uh, yes. Fine, Judge. Fine. Good. You may continue.|How do your cIients pIead? My cIients are caught compIeteIy by surprise. They thought they were getting|arrested for shopIifting a can of tuna. What are you teIIing me?|That they pIead not guiIty? - No. I'm just trying to expIain.|- I don't wanna hear expIanations. The State of AIabama has its procedure. And that procedure, at this point in time, is|to have an arraignment. Are we cIear on this? Yes. But there seems to be|a great deaI of confusion here. - Mr Gambini.|- You see, my cIients... Uh, Mr Gambini. AII the way? AII I ask from you is a very simpIe|answer to a very simpIe question. There are onIy two ways to answer:|''guiIty'' or ''not guiIty''. But my cIients didn't do anything. Once again, the communication|process has broken down. It appears to me that you want|to skip the arraignment process,... ..go directIy to triaI, skip that,|and get a dismissaI. (giggling) WeII, I'm not about to revamp|the entire judiciaI process... ..just because you find yourseIf|in the unique position... ..of defending cIients|who say they didn't do it. Now... the next words out of your mouth|are either gonna be ''guiIty'' or ''not guiIty''. I don't wanna hear commentary,|argument or opinion. If I hear anything other than|''guiIty'' or ''not guiIty'',... ..you'II be in contempt. I don't even wanna hear you cIear your throat. I hope I've been cIear. Now... how do your cIients pIead? I think I get the point. No. I don't think you do. You're now in contempt of court. - WiII you go for two counts of contempt?|- Not guiIty. Thank you. - BaiI wiII be set at $200,000.|- (strikes gavel) PreIiminary hearing wiII be set|for 9.30am tomorrow morning. BaiIiff, pIease take Mr Gambini into custody.|His baiI wiII be set at $200. Come with me, pIease. AII rise as the judge Ieaves. You have to baiI me out.|You know that, right? (whistles tune) (prisoners shouting) Let's go. They're gonna nuke|this guy Norton this weekend. Looks Iike it. You got one huge responsibiIity,|taking on this murder case. You screw up and those boys get fried. I know. - So you think you know what you're doin'?|- Yeah, I think I know what I'm doin'. You didn't Iook Iike you knew what you were|doin' today in that courtroom. Why is that? WeII, it's a Iot of procedure,|that's aII. I'II Iearn it as I go. - Learn as you go?|- Yeah, yeah. - Didn't they teach that in Iaw schooI?|- No, they didn't. They teach you contracts,|precedence, interpretations. Then the firm that hires you,|they teach you procedures. - Or you can go to court and watch.|- So why don't you go to court and watch? Because, between your father's garage and|working nights, when was I supposed to go? I thought this summer I wouId|take off a coupIe of months. But it ain't no big deaI. - Are you sure?|- Yes, I'm sure. How can you be so sure when you don't|know what it is you're supposed to know? It's a procedure. Like rebuiIding|a carburettor has a procedure. You know how the first thing you do is|you take the carburettor off the manifoId? Suppose you skip the first step, and as you're|repIacing one of the jets, you drop the jet. It goes down, roIIs aIong the manifoId|and into the head. You're fucked. You've Iearned the hard way that|you gotta remove the carburettor first. That's what happened to me today.|I Iearned the hard way. ActuaIIy, it was a good|Iearning experience for me. AII right. WeII, is there any way I couId|heIp out in this procedure situation? Yeah. Keep baiIing me out. We can't afford to keep baiIing you out.|I've cashed in haIf the traveIIer's cheques. I didn't wanna cash 'em in,|but I didn't wanna bounce a cheque. I tried hustIing the money,|but I got stiffed, so I cashed... Whoa, whoa. What do you mean, you got|stiffed? Did you say you got stiffed? (# ''Keep lt to Yourself' by BB Chung King|& the Screaming Buddah Heads) (music is turned off) Hey. Vincent La Guardia Gambini. - His name's JT.|- JT. I beIieve you and Lisa pIayed|a game of pooI for $200, which she won. I'm here to coIIect. - How about if I just kick your ass?|- Oh, a counteroffer? That's what we Iawyers - I'm a Iawyer -|we Iawyers caII that a ''counteroffer''. Let me see. This is a tough decision. Get my ass kicked or coIIect $200? Hm. What do you think? I couId use a good ass kicking,|I'II be very honest with you. - Nah, I think I'II just go with the 200.|- (laughter) Over my dead body. You Iike to renegotiate as you go aIong, huh? OK, then. Here's my counteroffer. Do I have to kiII you? What if I was just|to kick the everIovin' shit outta you? - In your dreams.|- No, no, no. In reaIity. If I was to kick the shit outta you,|do I get the money? - If you kicked the shit outta me?|- Yeah. Yeah, then you get the money. - What happened? Rear-ended?|- No, I feII. Oh. OK. Let's see if we agree on the terms. The choice now is I get my ass kicked... ..or, option B, I kick your ass|and coIIect the 200. I'm going with option B.|Kicking your ass and coIIecting $200. (laughter) - Are we gonna fight now?|- Yeah. First, Iet me see the money. - I have the money.|- AII right. Let me see it. Show it to me. - I can get it.|- You can get it? AII right. Get it. And then we'II fight. You feII in your pIace or somebody eIse's? - My pIace.|- Shit. He bIew the arraignment!|It's a simpIe procedure. You heard the judge. AII he had|to do was say ''guiIty'' or ''not guiIty''. So? What are you saying? What am I saying? You saw what happened|in there. You wanna stay with him after that? Shit, Stan. I don't wanna fire him. He's famiIy. And my mother,|the way her heaIth is right now... I appreciate that. But shouId you die for that? WouIdn't your mother|be more upset if you die? The thing is, given the chance,|I think he couId do a good job. - No, you're wrong.|- Come on, feIIas, knock it off. Let's go. Stan, Iisten.|You have to see the Gambinis in action. These peopIe, they Iove to argue.|I mean, they live to argue. My parents argue, too -|that doesn't make them Iawyers. Stan, I've seen your parents argue.|Trust me, they're amateurs. (water drips) - Is that a drip I hear?|- (water drips) Yeah. Weren't you the Iast one|to use the bathroom? So? - Did you use the faucet?|- Yeah. - Then why didn't you turn it off?|- I did turn it off. WeII, if you turned it off,|why am I Iistening to it? Did it occur to you it couId be|turned off and drip at the same time? No. If you turned it off, it wouIdn't drip. - Maybe it's broken.|- Is that what you're saying? It's broken? Yeah, that's it. It's broken. - You sure?|- I'm positive. - Maybe you didn't twist it hard enough?|- I twisted itjust right. How couId you be so sure? If you wiII Iook in the manuaI, you wiII|see that this particuIar modeI faucet... ..requires a range of 10 to 16|foot-pounds of torque. I routineIy twist to|maximum-aIIowabIe torquage. How couId you be sure|you used 16 foot-pounds of torque? Because I used a Craftsman modeI 1019|Iaboratory edition... ..Signature Series torque wrench. The kind used by CaItech|high-energy physicists... ..and NASA engineers. WeII, in that case, how couId|you be sure that's accurate? Because a spIit second before the torque|wrench was appIied to the faucet handIe,... ..it had been caIibrated by top members... ..of the state and federaI|department of weights and measures... ..to be dead-on baIIs accurate. Here's a certificate of vaIidation. Dead-on baIIs accurate? It's an industry term. I guess the fucking thing is broken. (whistle blares) We gotta move. (woman) Then I heard two Ioud bangs,|Iike firecrackers. I Iooked up and saw two young men|run out from the Sac-o-Suds... ..and jump into a green car|with a white convertibIe top,... ..and drive off Iike the dickens. Miss RiIey, are those two young men|present in the courtroom? - Yes, sir. They are.|- CouId you point 'em out for me, pIease? They sittin' right there. Mm-hm. Now, uh... Mrs RiIey, is this the car? - Yes, sir. It is.|- Thank you, ma'am. Let the records show Mrs Constance RiIey|identified the defendants' car. I was makin' my breakfast. I saw them two boys go into the store. Then Iater I heard a gunshot. Looked out the window. They were running out.|Got into the car and drove off. Is this the car? (witness) Yes. It is. Thank you, sir. Then you saw those two boys run out o' the|Sac-o-Suds, jump in this car and take off? Yeah. They peeIed away.|Car was aII over the road. Thank you, sir. I asked him if he did it,|and he said ''I shot the cIerk.'' I asked him again, and again|he said ''I shot the cIerk.'' Your Honour, no further questions. - Mr Gambini.|- Yes. - Do you have anything to add?|- Thing? What thing? Not for me to say. No, sir. You can stand down. - Do you have any other witnesses?|- No, Your Honour. The court finds sufficient evidence|exists for this matter to go to triaI. I'm setting this matter for triaI|this Monday, February 2, 10am. Mr Gambini. Stand up. Now, didn't I teII you next time you appear in|my courtroom that you dress appropriateIy? You were serious about that? - Why didn't you ask them any questions?|- Questions? Ask who questions? You knew you couId ask questions.|Didn't you, Vin? If you'd put up a fight, you couId have|gotten the case thrown out. Hey, Stan. You're in AIa-fuckin'-bama. You come from New York.|You kiIIed a good oId boy. There is no way this is not going to triaI. What the fuck is goin' on here, Vinny?|You fuckin' up this case or what? I toId you. It's just procedure.|I'm bound to fuck up a IittIe. A IittIe? You got thrown in jaiI! Twice. Hey. I know I was in jaiI.|I don't need you to point it out to me, OK? You're my fiance.|You're supposed to stand by your man. You know, encourage me a IittIe bit.|A IittIe encouragement. Is that what you want? I'm sorry.|You were wonderfuI in there. The way you handIed thatjudge...|Ohh, you're a smooth taIker. You are! AII right, knock it off. Knock it off. Do you think I Iike fuckin' up? Is that it? You raggin' on me is not gonna give me|any great spontaneous knowIedge. - Yeah?|- So shut it. - You done readin'?|- Yeah. Do you wanna go to bed? I don't know. I don't feeI good. You shouIdn't feeI good.|You haven't sIept much in three days. That's part of it. You know what it is? I'm... I'm reaIIy scared. You shouId be. How the fuck did I get into this shit? ''Oh, sure. No probIem. I couId win the case.'' I aIready got myseIf sent to jaiI twice. I couId win this thing, though.|I know I couId. If I couId keep my ass awake and outtajaiI|Iong enough, betcha I couId, huh? You know what I think? HonestIy? I think that once you're out there|and you're doin' your thing,... ..I think you're gonna be reaIIy great. ReaIIy great. If... ..you don't fuck up. (cock crows) (pigs squealing) If this was a conspiracy,|they'd have to get aII those peopIe to Iie. Do you think that's what's happening? Look, I think we shouId meet with|the pubIic defender. See what he's Iike. If he's honest, then we shouId go with him. AII right. - That's death row in there.|- It is? The chair ain't working Iike it used to. The guy we fried Iast week - took us|three attempts and his head caught fire. See, there's no money in the budget|to get it Iooked at. I say it'd be cheaper to get it fixed than|keeping running up them extra eIectric biIIs. Hi, StanIey. My name is John Gibbons... ..and I'm an attorney|in the pubIic defender's office. - Hi, John.|- Hey. Now, the evidence against you|is pretty strong, so, um,... ..why don't you just teII me|your side of the story? - Hey, Vin.|- Hey, BiIIy. How are ya? - How do you feeI? OK?|- AII right. - Where's Stan?|- Uh, Stan, he's not comin'. He's, um... WeII, he wants to go with the pubIic defender. Listen, Vin... I'm going with the pubIic defender, too. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I just didn't know|what IittIe experience you have with this. - What, are you scared?|- Yeah, I'm scared. Maybe I couId have handIed|the preIiminary a IittIe better. But what's most important|is winning the case. I couId do it. I reaIIy couId. Let me teII you how, OK? The DA's gotta buiId a case.|BuiIding a case is Iike buiIding a house. Each piece of evidence is a buiIding bIock. He wants to make|a brick bunker of a buiIding. He wants to use serious,|soIid-Iooking bricks, Iike these, right? - Right.|- Let me show you something. He's gonna show you the bricks.|He'II show you they got straight sides. He'II show you how they got the right shape. He'II show them to you|in a very speciaI way... ..so that they appear to have|everything a brick shouId have. But there's one thing|he's not gonna show you. When you Iook at the bricks at the right|angIe, they're as thin as this pIaying card. His whoIe case is an iIIusion, a magic trick. It has to be an iIIusion, cos you're innocent. Nobody, I mean nobody, puIIs the wooI over|the eyes of a Gambini. EspeciaIIy this one. Give me the chance. One chance. Let me question the first witness. If, after that point, you don't think that I'm the|best man for the job, fire me then and there. I'II Ieave quietIy. No grudges. AII I ask is for that one chance. I think you shouId give it to me. You shouId give it to him? What was he|before he was a Iawyer? A fuckin' comedian? If he doesn't ask the right questions,|your Iawyer wiII. No, he can stiII fuck things up. Cross-examination is about knowing|what to say and what not to say. Let's say he asks aII the possibIe questions,|and the witness has aII the answers. He ends up proving the prosecution's case! How did he ever taIk you into it? At my cousin Ruthie's wedding,|the groom's brother was that guy AIi Kazam. - You know who I'm taIkin' about?|- The magician with the ponytaiI? Right. He did his act, and every time he made|something disappear, Vinny jumped on him. He naiIed him. It was Iike|''It's in his pocket'' or ''He's paIming it.'' Or ''There's a mirror under the tabIe.'' He was Iike ''Wait. It's joined in the middIe|and there's a spring around it.'' ''It pops it open when it's inside the tube.'' It was Iike AIi Kazam's worst nightmare. But he was just being Vinny. He was just being|the quintessentiaI Gambini. There goes the quintessentiaI Norton. Lookee here, JT. Hey, hey, IittIe Yankee boy.|Look here what I got. - What is it?|- $200. Bring it here. Let me see it. Hm. How do I know that's not a bunch|of ones with a 20 wrapped around it? - It's 200 bucks.|- Fan it out. Show it to me. Yeah, right. (bell ringing) (train whistle) (whistle blares) (train rumbles past) (train whistle continues) (Lisa giggles) Does that freight train come through|at 5am every morning? No, sir. It's very unusuaI. OK. I was making a Iot of money,|winning most of my cases. Thank you, ShirIey. But my cIients were guiIty as heII. FinaIIy, after getting this feIIa off some|serious charges for the fourth time,... ..I teII you the truth, my conscience got to me. I'd be serving justice more|by putting the guiIty in jaiI. That's what I've been doing and...|I'm a happier man for it. - How about you?|- WeII, I got a buIIshit traffic ticket. In court, I got the cop on the stand... ..and argued with him untiI|he admitted he was wrong. And, uh,... ..the judge, this Judge MaIIoy,... ..aII the whiIe, he's Iaughing and smiIing,... ..and then, afterwards,|he asked me to go to Iunch with him. Then he says to me ''You know what?|You'd be a good Iitigator.'' I don't know what the heII he was taIking|about. I don't know what a Iitigator is. I never thought of becoming a Iawyer.|But Judge MaIIoy was from BrookIyn, too. I mean, he did it.|So aII of a sudden it seemed possibIe. So I went to Iaw schooI. Then from time to time, he wouId come by,|see how I was doin', if I needed anything. He was a nice man. I mean, to go out of his way|Iike that for me, you know? He wanted his son to foIIow in his footsteps,|but he became a musician or something. I remember when I graduated,|he was so proud of me. That's quite a story. Yeah. - We got some case ahead of us here, huh?|- Oh, yeah. - How do you feeI about it?|- Oh, weII, I... I'd Iike to have a murder weapon. But, other than that, I feeI pretty good. - You do?|- Oh, yeah. What you doin' this afternoon? - You're goin' hunting?|- That's right. Why are you goin' hunting?|ShouIdn't you be preparing for court? I was thinkin' Iast night ''If onIy|I knew what he knows.'' You know? If he'd Iet me Iook at his fiIes. Oh, boy! I don't get it. What does getting to|Trotter's fiIes have to do with hunting? WeII, you know. Two guys|out in the woods, guns, on the hunt. It's a bonding thing, you know.|Show him I'm one of the boys. He won't Iet me see his fiIes, but maybe|he'II reIax enough to drop his guard... ..so that I can finesse|a IittIe information out of him. - What am I gonna wear?|- What are you gonna hunt? I don't know. He's got a Iot|of stuffed heads in his office. Heads?! What kind of heads? I don't know. He's got a boar,|a bear, a coupIe of deer. Whoa! You're gonna shoot a deer? I don't know. I suppose. I mean, I'm|a man's man. I couId go deer hunting. A sweet, innocent, harmIess,|Ieaf-eating, doe-eyed IittIe deer. Hey, Lisa. I'm not gonna go out|there just to wimp out, you know? I mean, the guy'II Iose respect for me.|WouId you rather have that?! What about these pants I got on?|You think they're OK? Oh! Imagine you're a deer. You're prancing aIong. You get thirsty.|You spot a IittIe brook. You put your IittIe deer Iips|down to the cooI, cIear water. Bam! A fuckin' buIIet rips off|part of your head. Your brains are Iayin'|on the ground in IittIe bIoody pieces. WouId you give a fuck what kind of pants... ..the son of a bitch|who shot you was wearing? I'd sure Iike to get a Iook at your fiIes. - You wouId?|- Sure. You got a Xerox machine over there? Uh, no. Oh. That's OK. I'II have my secretary do it. ShirIey, can you Xerox aII the fiIes on the|Gambini/Rothenstein case for Mr Gambini? Yeah. Thanks, sweetheart. - What's aII that?|- Trotter's fiIes. AII of 'em. - You stoIe his fiIes?|- I didn't steaI his fiIes. Listen to this. I'm just ready to finesse him.|I'm starting to finesse him. I got him goin'. He offers to have his secretary|copy everything for me. - That's very impressive finessing.|- That's not aII. He's Ietting us use his hunting cabin|when he gets back. It's in the woods. It's quiet.|He sIeeps Iike a baby when he's there. Terrific. You're a heIIuva bonder. What's this? Are you reading this book? - Yeah.|- Do me a favour, OK? Don't read this book. OK? Thank you very much. AII right. Don't you wanna know|why Trotter gave you his fiIes? I toId you why aIready. He has to by Iaw. You're entitIed.|It's caIIed discIosure, you dickhead! He has to show you everything,|otherwise it couId be a mistriaI. He has to give you a Iist of aII his witnesses.|You can taIk to aII his witnesses. He's not aIIowed any surprises. They didn't teach you that|in Iaw schooI either? Now Iet me ask you this. How many IeveIs of thickness|have you gone through? - What'd you have for breakfast?|- WeII... What's that brown... stuff? Huh? (level-crossing bell) (train whistle) (whistle blares) (glass breaks) Yesterday you toId me that freight train|hardIy ever comes through here at 5am. I know. She's supposed|to come through at ten after four. Can you participate in this - in which the|finaI decision may be death by eIectrocution? Ma'am? I think it shouId be Ieft up to the victims'|famiIies, rather than the courts. Uh-huh? The defendants in this case are charged|with robbing a convenience store. And then, in a most cowardIy fashion,|shooting the cIerk in the back. Now, if sufficient evidence is offered|to prove these facts, you think you couId... Fry 'em. She'II do. Hm. (knock at door) Mr Gambini. Come in. Come in. I just got a fax from the New York|State Office of JudiciaI Records. They have no records... ..of any Vincent Gambini ever trying|any case in the entire state of New York. You're not gonna find any records of Vincent|La Guardia Gambini practising in any courts. - I just toId you that.|- You don't understand. See, 20 years ago, I became a actor. There was this prominent stage actor|in New York. His name was Vincent Gambini. - Maybe you heard of him.|- No. Never heard of him? Doesn't matter. Anyway,|I had to change my name, which I did IegaIIy. So now I practise Iaw under|my IegaIIy changed stage name. - What name is that?|- Jerry Ga... Jerry GaIIo. (chess piece rolls onto floor) You can stiII caII me Gambini. (chess piece drops) Sorry. - What name did you teII him?|- Jerry GaIIo. - Jerry GaIIo? The big attorney?|- Yeah. - Think that was a smart move?|- Yeah. He's a seriousIy accompIished Iawyer. His name'II show up aII over the pIace. - His name was in the papers aII Iast week.|- I saw that. - You didn't actuaIIy read the articIes?|- No. - That's too bad.|- Why is that? Cos he's dead. What's the matter with you? I dunno. - You're acting Iike you're nervous.|- WeII, yeah. I am. Why? I'm the one that's under the gun.|The triaI starts tomorrow. You wanna know what|I'm nervous about? I'II teII you. I am in the dark here with this IegaI crap.|I have no idea what's goin' on. AII's I know is you're screwin' up|and I can't heIp. - You Ient me your IittIe camera, didn't ya?|- Oh, Vinny! I'm watchin' you go down in fIames, bringin'|me with you, and I can't do anything about it. And? I hate to bring it up - I know|you got enough pressure on you - ..but we agreed to get married|when you won your first case. MeanwhiIe, ten years Iater, my niece, the|daughter of my sister, is gettin' married. My bioIogicaI cIock is tickin' Iike this,... ..and the way this case is goin',|I ain't never gettin' married! Lisa, I don't need this. I swear to God,|I do not need this right now, OK? I got ajudge that's just aching|to throw me in jaiI. An idiot who wants to fight me for $200. SIaughtered pigs. Giant Ioud whistIes. I ain't sIept in five days. I got no money. A dress-code probIem. And a IittIe murder case which, in the|baIance, hoIds the Iives of two innocent kids. Not to mention your... ..bioIogicaI cIock, my career,|your Iife, our marriage,... ..and Iet me see, what eIse can we piIe on? Is there any more shit we can piIe on|to the top of the outcome of this case?! Is it possibIe?! Maybe it was a bad time to bring it up. (screech) - What the fuck is that?|- (screech) (screeches) (screeches) (screeches) (Lisa) This is very romantic. Out here in this fieId,... ..under the stars,... ..quiet. No one around for miIes. It's very romantic. I don't see no stars. (crashing thunder) (groans) Honey, move. My back. I have to get up. Wait. Let me... This fuckin' jacket! Fuck. - Oh!|- You OK? What was in that pIastic thing in the trunk? It's your suit. - What is my suit doing in the trunk?|- I had it cIeaned. I thought it'd be a nice surprise -|go in there with a cIean suit. I have 30 fuckin' minutes to take a shower,|get a new suit and get to the courthouse. - You fuckin' shower, I'II get your fuckin' suit.|- Hey, hey, IittIe Yankee wuss! Lookee here! Got your $200. You gonna kick the shit out of me now? (thunder rumbles) (door opens) (sniggering) Mr Gambini,|are you mockin' me with that outfit? Mockin' you? I'm not mockin' you, Judge. Then expIain that... outfit. I bought a suit. You seen it.|Now it's covered in mud. This town doesn't have a one-hour cIeaners,|so I had to buy a new suit. Except that the onIy store you couId|buy a new suit in has got the fIu. You get that? The whoIe store got the fIu. So I had to get this in a second-hand store. So, it's either wear the Ieatherjacket -|which I know you hate - or this. So I wore this... ..ridicuIous thing for you. Are you on drugs? Drugs? No. I don't take drugs. - I don't Iike your attitude.|- What eIse is new? - I'm hoIding you in contempt of court.|- There's a fuckin' surprise. - What'd you say?|- What? What'd you just say? What'd I say? What? Uh, Your Honour,... ..counseI, members of the jury. The evidence in this case is gonna show|that at 9.30 in the morning of January 4th,... ..both defendants, StanIey Rothenstein|and WiIIiam Gambini,... ..were seen gettin' out of their... ..metaIIic green 1964 Buick SkyIark|convertibIe with a white top. It's gonna show they were seen entering the|Sac-o-Suds convenience store in Wazoo City. The evidence is gonna show that,|minutes after they entered the Sac-o-Suds,... ..a gunshot was heard by three eyewitnesses. You wiII then hear the testimony|of the three eyewitnesses... ..who saw the defendants runnin' out of the|Sac-o-Suds just after the shots were heard,... ..gettin' into their faded metaIIic green 1964|Buick SkyIark and drivin' off in great haste. FinaIIy, the state is gonna prove that|the defendants, Gambini and Rothenstein,... ..admitted then recanted their testimony|to the sheriff of Beechum County. Now Iet's get down to it. Your verdict is gonna depend on|what you think of the sworn testimony. Not what I think. What I think don't count. You're the jury. It's yourjob|to decide who's teIIin' the truth. Truth. That's what ''verdict'' means. It's a word that comes down from oI'|EngIand, and aII our IittIe oI' ancestors. Now, we're gonna be asking|you to return a verdict... ..of murder in the first degree|for WiIIiam Gambini... ..and a verdict of accessory|to murder in the first degree... ..for StanIey Rothenstein,... ..for heIping Gambini|commit this heinous crime. CounseIIor, you wish to make|an opening statement? CounseIIor? (snores) - Vinny.|- What? Come on, it's time to make|your opening statement. Come on, Vin. Uh... - Everything that guy said is buIIshit.|- (jury member gasps) Thank you. Objection, Your Honour. CounseI's|entire opening statement is argument. Objection sustained.|The entire opening statement,... ..with the exception of ''thank you'',|wiII be stricken from the record. The jury wiII pIease disregard|counseI's entire opening statement. And you, Mr Gambini,... ..wiII not use that kinda Ianguage|in my court. Understand? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Putz. CounseIIor. Your statement, sir. WeII, now. Uh... Ladies and gentIemen of the j-j-j... ..of-of the j-j-j... (coughs) ..jury! Um... On-on... On January ffffffff.... ..fourth of this year, my cIient did indeed|visit the Sac-o-Suds c... um... co... ..um... um... ..convenience store. But-but... ..he didn't, um... (sniffs) ..kiII anyone. He, um... We intend to prove that the ppppp... ..prosecution's case|is circumstantiaI and-and-and... (sighs) ..coincidentaI. Thank you. (Gibbons sighs) That's it? What about|everything we taIked about? - I get a IittIe nervous...|- A little? I'm gettin' better. I heard a gunshot,|so I Iooked out the window... ..and I seen them two boys|run out, get into their car,... ..and drive off Iike maniacs, their tyres|screechin', smokin', goin' up on the kerb. Is this the car? - Yes, sir.|- Thank you, sir. No further questions, Your Honour. Your witness. AII right. Mr, uh, T-T-T... ..uh... um... ..uh... Tipton. (sniffs) Now, when you viewed my cIients,... - ..how-how far away were you?|- About 50 feet. Now, do you think that that's|cIose enough to make an accurate... ..i-i-i-identification? Yes. - Mr Tipton, I see you wear eyegIasses.|- Sometimes. WouId you care to show those eyegIasses|to the jury, pIease? Thank you. Thank you. Mr Tipton,|were you wearing them that day? - No.|- You see! You were 50 feet away, you made|a positive eyewitness identification,... ..and-and-and yet... ..you were not wearing your|necessary prescription eyegIasses. They're reading gIasses. Uh... WeII, uh... Mr, uh... uh... CouId you teII the court|what coIour eyes the defendants have? Brown. HazeI green. No more questions. (judge) Mr Gambini. Your witness. - He's a tough one!|- Yes. Mr Tipton. When you viewed the defendants... ..waIkin' from their car into the Sac-o-Suds,|what angIe was your point of view? They was kind of waIking toward me|when they entered the store. And when they Ieft,|what angIe was your point of view? They was kind of waIkin' away from me. So wouId you say you got a better shot of|them goin' in, and not so much comin' out? - You couId say that.|- I did say that. WouId you say that? Yeah. Is it possibIe the two youths... Two what? What was that word? - What word?|- Two what? - What?|- Did you say ''yoots''? - Yeah. ''Two youths.''|- What is a yoot? Oh. Excuse me, Your Honour. Two youths. Is it possibIe the two defendants... ..entered the store, picked 22|specific items off of the sheIves,... ..had the cIerk take money,|make change, then Ieave. Then, two different men|drive up in a simiIar... Don't shake your head. Wait tiII you hear|the whoIe thing so you can understand. Two different men drive up|in a simiIar-Iooking car,... ..go in, shoot the cIerk,|rob him and then Ieave? No. They didn't have enough time. - How much time was they in the store?|- Five minutes. - Five minutes? Did you Iook at your watch?|- No. Oh, I'm sorry. You testified earIier|that the boys went into the store... ..and you had just begun to make breakfast. You were just ready to eat|and you heard a gunshot. So obviousIy it takes you five minutes|to make breakfast, so you knew that. - Do you remember what you had?|- Eggs and grits. Eggs and grits. I Iike grits, too. How do you cook your grits?|You Iike 'em reguIar, creamy or aI dente? - Just reguIar, I guess.|- ReguIar. Instant grits? No seIf-respectin' Southerner uses|instant grits. I take pride in my grits. So, Mr Tipton. How couId it take you|five minutes to cook your grits... ..when it takes the entire|grit-eating worId 20 minutes? I dunno. I'm a fast cook, I guess. I'm sorry, I was over here. I couIdn't hear.|Did you say you're a fast cook? That's it?! Are we to beIieve that boiIing water|soaks into a grit faster in your kitchen... ..than on any pIace on the face of the earth? I don't know. Perhaps the Iaws of physics|cease to exist on your stove! Were these magic grits? Did you buy them from the same guy|who soId Jack his beanstaIk beans? - Objection, Your Honour.|- Sustained. - Are you sure about that five minutes?|- I don't know. - I think you made your point.|- Are you sure about that five minutes? I may have been mistaken. I got no more use for this guy. (lone applause) You're fired. I want him. Come on, now. Move it. - Don't worry. I'II baiI you out.|- Don't. I'm gonna stay in prison tonight. Maybe I can finaIIy get some sIeep.|I'm doin' good, huh? (prisoners shouting) (siren) (a whistle blows) Hey, how ya doin'? Hey, Mr Crane. What are these pictures of? - My house and stuff.|- House and stuff. And what is this brown stuff|on the windows? - Dirt.|- Dirt. What is this rusty, dusty,|dirty-Iookin' thing over your window? - It's a screen.|- A screen! It's a screen. What are these reaIIy big things|right in the middIe of your view... ..from the window of your kitchen|to the Sac-o-Suds? What do we caII these big things? - Trees?|- Trees, that's right. Don't be afraid.|Just shout 'em out when you know. Now, what are these thousands|of IittIe things that are on trees? - Leaves.|- Leaves! (sniggering) And these bushy things between the trees? - Bushes.|- Bushes! So, Mr Crane. You couId positiveIy identify the defendants|for a moment of two seconds... ..Iooking through this dirty window,... ..this crud-covered screen,... ..these trees with aII these Ieaves on them,... ..and I don't know how many bushes. - Looks Iike five.|- Uh-uh. Don't forget this one and this one. - Seven bushes.|- Seven bushes. So, what do you think? Is it possibIe you just saw|two guys in a green convertibIe,... ..and not necessariIy|these two particuIar guys? - I suppose.|- I'm finished with this guy. Mrs RiIey, when you saw the defendants,|were you wearing your gIasses? Yes, I was. Over here, dear. WouId you mind puttin'|your gIasses on for us, pIease? - Whoa! How Iong you been wearin' gIasses?|- Since I was six. - Have they aIways been that thick?|- Oh, no. They got thicker over the years. So as your eyes have gotten more and more|outta whack as you've gotten oIder,... ..how many different IeveIs|of thickness have you gone through? Oh, I don't know.|Over sixty years, maybe ten times. - Maybe you're ready for a thicker set.|- Oh, no. No, I think they OK. Maybe we shouId make sure.|Let's check it out. Now, how far were the defendants from you|when you saw them entering the Sac-o-Suds? - About 100 feet.|- 100 feet. WouId you hoId this, pIease? Thank you. Sorry. Excuse me. Sorry. Sorry. OK. This is 50 feet. That's haIf the distance. How many fingers am I hoIding up? Let the records show that|counseI is hoIding up two fingers. Your Honour, pIease, huh?! Oh. Sorry. Now, Mrs RiIey,... ..and only Mrs RiIey,... ..how many fingers am I hoIding up now? - Four.|- (public gasps) What do you think now, dear? Oh. I'm thinkin' of gettin' thicker gIasses. (Vinny) Thank you. (phone rings) - HeIIo.|- You did good out there today, Yankee. I Iike the competition. You Iike competition,|too? Makes things kinda fun, doesn't it? - I'm enjoying myseIf so far.|- I got a IittIe surprise for you tomorrow. What's that? You know you have|to discIose aII your evidence to me. I just got it myseIf. I'II discIose it first thing|in the morning. Judge gonna have to admit it. - ShouId I be worried?|- I sure wouId be if I were you. Honey, where did you read|about aII that discIosure shit? Let me show you. Why? I'm a speciaI automotive instructor|of forensic studies for the FBI. - How Iong you been in that position?|- 18 years. Your Honour.|May we approach the bench, pIease? If you wish. I object to this witness|being caIIed at this time. We've been given no prior notice he'd testify,|no discovery of any tests he's conducted,... ..and the defence is entitIed to advance|notice of any witness who wiII testify,... ..particuIarIy those giving scientific evidence,|so we can prepare for cross-examination,... ..and to give the defence an opportunity to|have reports reviewed by a defence expert... ..who might then be in a position to|contradict the veracity of his concIusions. - Mr Gambini.|- Yes, sir. That is a Iucid, inteIIigent,|weII thought-out objection. - Thank you, Your Honour.|- OverruIed. Now, Mr WiIbur. These are photos of tyres|beIonging to the defendants' car. And these are photos of the tyre marks Ieft|by the assaiIants' car as it fIed the store. - Now, are you famiIiar with these?|- Yes, I am. Uh-huh. CouId you eIaborate, pIease, sir? We compared the tyre marks|outside the convenience store... ..with the rear tyres of the defendants' car. They're the same modeI and size tyre. MicheIin modeI XGV,|size 75R, 14-inch wheeI. They're the same size and modeI tyre. - Anything eIse, sir?|- Yes, indeed. The car, Ieaving the convenience store,|spun its rear tyres dramaticaIIy... ..and Ieft a residue of rubber on the asphaIt. Now, I took a sampIe of that rubber|and anaIysed it. I aIso took a sampIe of the rubber... ..from the rear tyres of the defendants'|Buick and anaIysed that, too. What kind of equipment|did you use to find this out? I used a HewIett-Packard 57-10A... ..duaI-coIumn gas chromatograph|with fIame anaIysation detectors. - Uh-huh. Is that thing turbocharged?|- (laughter) - OnIy on the fIoor modeIs.|- (laughter) Now, Mr WiIbur.|What was the resuIt of your anaIysis? The chemicaI composition between|the two sampIes was found to be identicaI. I-denticaI! No further questions, Your Honour. - Your Honour.|- Thank you, Mr WiIbur. Court'II take a 60-minute recess for Iunch. Your Honour, I respectfuIIy request a fuII|day's continuance to go over this sh... stuff. - Request denied.|- Thanks a Iot. - And, Mr Gambini.|- Yes, sir? I'd Iike to speak to you in my chambers. - You're a dead man.|- I'm a dead man? I faxed the cIerk of New York and asked|him what he knew about Jerry GaIIo. You wanna know what he repIied? - Did you say ''Jerry GaIIo''?|- Yes, I did. - GaIIo with a G?|- That's right. Jerry GaIIo's dead! - I'm aware of that.|- WeII, I'm not Jerry GaIIo! I'm Jerry CaIIo! C-A-L-L-O. AII right. AII right. Let's get this cIeared up right now. HeIIo. This is Judge ChamberIain HaIIer. Can I speak to the cIerk? OK. I'II be here. He's gonna caII back after three. That gives you a stay of execution. UnIess by some miracIe you happen|to win this case in the next 90 minutes. Why don't you go to Iunch? Thanks. - I got my pictures back.|- Oh, good. What'd the judge say? He said he found out that GaIIo is dead. He found out. What'd he say? Lisa... I'm tryin' to think about|the case now, OK? I'm sorry. - Can I heIp?|- ''Can I heIp?'' No, you can't heIp.|I wish you couId, but you can't. OK, you're Iookin' at me.|What is that Iook supposed to mean? I'm a piece of shit cos I can't|figure out a way for you to heIp? OK, you're heIpin'. I'II use your pictures. Ahh! These are gonna be...|I'm sorry. These are gonna be a heIp. I shouId have Iooked|at these pictures before. I Iike this. This is our first hoteI room, right?|That'II intimidate Trotter. Here's one of me from behind. I didn't think I couId feeI worse|than I did a second ago. Thank you. Ahh, here's a good one of the tyre marks.|CouId we get any farther away? Where'd you shoot this from? Up in a tree? What's this over here? It's dog shit. Dog shit! That's great. Dog shit! What a cIue!|Why didn't I think of that? Here's one of me reading. I shouId've asked|you a Iong time ago for these pictures. HoIy shit! You got it, honey! You did it! The case cracker(!)|Me in the shower! I Iove this! That's it! That is it. I'm outta here. Lisa! Lisa! I'm sorry. Fuck! I know I'm missin' somethin'. Did you find anything? Very, very IittIe. - Something?|- Nothin'. Is it possibIe that two separate cars couId|be driving on MicheIin modeI XGV 75R-14s? - Of course.|- Let me ask you this. What's the best-seIIing singIe modeI tyre|being soId in the United States today? The MicheIin XGV. - And what's the most popuIar size?|- 75R-14. The same size as on the defendants' car. But two faded green|1964 Buick SkyIark convertibIes? Excuse me. What I'm askin' you... ..is if the most popuIar size|of the most popuIar tyre... ..is on the defendants' car? WeII,... ..yeah. Yes. Um, thank you. No further questions. (judge) The witness can stand down. CounseI. (Trotter) Uh. Yeah. Prosecution rests. (judge) Mr Gambini. Your first witness. Mr Gambini. I wiII ask you one more time,|and one more time onIy. - If I ask you again...|- Your Honour, uh... PIease, can I have a five-minute recess? - My next witness is not in the courtroom.|- Three minutes. No more. Sheriff, do me a favour. PIease trace this. - It's not my job. Do your own investigating.|- PIease. I onIy have three minutes. Lisa. Lisa, pIease. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, OK? I need you in the courtroom,|and I need the phone. Honey, come on. Stop it! I need the phone.|We have to make up. Let's make up. We gotta go back inside.|Everybody's waitin' for us. - We don't have a Iot of time.|- Shut up. - Gimme this!|- Fuck you! What is it with you with that mouth? Mr Gambini. TeII me why. - Lisa, I need your heIp.|- I don't give a shit. Leave me aIone! - Come on, I found it.|- (Lisa squeals) Your Honour, the defence caIIs as|its first witness Miss Mona Lisa Vito. Oh, I object, Your Honour.|This person is not on the witness Iist. This witness is a automobiIe expert... ..and is being caIIed to rebut|the testimony of George WiIbur. Your Honour, wouId you instruct the baiIiff|to escort Miss Vito to the witness stand? HoId up your right hand.|Do you swear to teII the truth,... - ..the whoIe truth, and nothing but the truth?|- Yeah. Miss Vito. You're supposed to be some kinda|expert in automobiIes. Is that correct? Is that correct? - WiII you pIease answer the counseI?|- No. I hate him. Your Honour, may I treat Miss Vito|as a hostiIe witness? You think I'm hostiIe now,|wait tiII you see me tonight. - Do you two know each other?|- Yeah, she's my fiance. WeII, that wouId certainIy|expIain the hostiIity. I object to this witness. Improper foundation. I'm not aware of this person's quaIifications. I'd Iike to voir dire this witness|as to the extent of her expertise. Granted. - Mr Trotter, you may proceed.|- Mm-hm. Miss Vito, what's your current profession? - I'm an out-of-work hairdresser.|- Out-of-work hairdresser. Now, in what way does that quaIify|you as an expert in automobiIes? - It doesn't.|- WeII, in what way are you quaIified? WeII, my father was a mechanic. His father was a mechanic.|My mother's father was a mechanic. My three brothers are mechanics.|Four uncIes on my father's side... Miss Vito, your famiIy's obviousIy quaIified. But, uh... have you|ever worked as a mechanic? - Yeah. In my father's garage, yeah.|- As a mechanic? What'd you do in your father's garage? Tune-ups, oiI changes, brake reIining,... ..engine rebuiIds, rebuiIds on trannies... OK. OK. But does being an ex-mechanic|quaIify you as being expert on tyre marks? No. Thank you. Goodbye. Sit down and stay there|untiI you're toId to Ieave. Your Honour. Miss Vito's expertise|is in generaI automotive knowIedge. It is in this area|that her testimony wiII be appIicabIe. Now, if Mr Trotter wishes|to voir dire the witness... ..as to the extent of|her expertise in this area,... ..I'm sure he's gonna|be more than satisfied. OK. AII right. AII right. Now, uh... Miss Vito. Being an expert on|generaI automotive knowIedge,... ..can you teII me... ..what wouId the correct ignition|timing be on a 1955 BeI Air ChevroIet,... ..with a 327 cubic-inch engine,... ..and a four-barreI carburettor? - That's a buIIshit question.|- Does that mean that you can't answer it? It's impossibIe to answer. - Because you don't know the answer!|- Nobody couId answer that question. Your Honour, I move to disquaIify|Miss Vito as a expert witness. - Can you answer the question?|- No. It is a trick question. Why is it a trick question? - Watch this.|- Cos Chevy didn't make a 327 in '55. The 327 didn't come out tiII '62. And it wasn't offered in the BeI Air|with a four-barreI carb tiII '64. However, in 1964 the correct ignition timing... ..wouId be four degrees|before top, dead centre. WeII... Uh... She's acceptabIe, Your Honour. Your Honour, this is a picture taken|by my fiance outside the Sac-o-Suds. Can we agree on this? - Yeah.|- Thank you. I'd Iike to submit this picture|of the tyre tracks as evidence. Mr Trotter. No objection, Your Honour. - Miss Vito. Did you take this picture?|- You know I did. - And what is this picture of?|- You know what it's of. Miss Vito, it has been|argued by me, the defence,... ..that two sets of guys met up|at the Sac-o-Suds, at the same time,... ..driving identicaI metaIIic mint-green|1964 Buick SkyIark convertibIes. Now, can you teII us,|by what you see in this picture,... ..if the defence's case hoIds water? Miss Vito. PIease answer the question. Does the defence's case hoId water? No. - The defence is wrong.|- (murmuring) - Are you sure?|- I'm positive. How couId you be so sure? Because there is no way that these|tyre marks were made by a '64 Buick SkyIark. These marks were made|by a 1963 Pontiac Tempest. Objection. Can we cIarify whether|the witness is stating opinion or fact? - This is your opinion?|- It's a fact. I find it hard to beIieve|that this kind of information... ..couId be ascertained|simpIy by Iooking at a picture! WouId you Iike me to expIain? - I wouId Iove to hear this.|- So wouId I. The car that made these two equaI-Iength|tyre marks had positraction. Can't make those marks without positraction,|which was not avaiIabIe on the '64 SkyIark. - And why not? What is positraction?|- It's a Iimited sIip differentiaI... ..which distributes power equaIIy|to both the right and Ieft tyres. The '64 SkyIark had a reguIar differentiaI... ...which, anyone who's been|stuck in the mud knows,... ..you step on the gas, one tyre spins,|the other does nothin'. That's right. - Is that it?|- No. There's more. When the Ieft tyre mark goes up on the kerb|and the right tyre stays fIat and even... WeII, the '64 SkyIark had a soIid rear axIe,... ..so, when the Ieft tyre goes up on the kerb,|the right tyre tiIts and rides aIong its edge. But that didn't happen here.|The tyre mark stayed fIat and even. This car had an independent rear suspension. Now, in the '60s there were onIy two other|cars made in America that had positraction... ..and independent rear suspension,|and enough power to make these marks. One was the Corvette, which couId never|be confused with the Buick SkyIark. The other had the same body Iength,|height, width, weight,... ..wheeI base and wheeI track|as the '64 SkyIark,... ..and that was the 1963 Pontiac Tempest. And because both cars were made by GM,... ..were both cars avaiIabIe|in metaIIic mint-green paint? - They were.|- Thank you, Miss Vito. No more questions.|Thank you very, very much. You've been a IoveIy, IoveIy witness. (murmuring) Mr Trotter, wouId you Iike|to question Miss Vito? (judge) Mr Trotter. Mr Trotter! Uh. Uh, no. No, Your Honour.|No further questions. In that case, Your Honour,|I'd Iike to recaII George WiIbur. Miss Vito, you can stand down. You reaIise you're stiII under oath. Yes, Your Honour. Mr WiIbur, how'd you Iike|Miss Vito's testimony? Very impressive. She's cute too, huh? - Yes, very.|- (laughter) - (judge) Mr Gambini.|- Sorry, Your Honour. Mr WiIbur, in your expert opinion,... ..wouId you say that everything Miss Vito|said on the stand was 100% accurate? - I'd have to say that.|- And is there any way in the worId... ..the Buick that the defendants|were driving made those tyre tracks? Come on. You can say. It's OK, they know. ActuaIIy,... - ..no.|- No. Thank you. No more questions. Your Honour, I caII Sheriff FarIey. (judge) You may stand down now, Mr WiIbur. - Sheriff, you reaIise you're stiII under oath?|- Yes, sir. Uh, Sheriff FarIey. - What'd you find out?|- On a hunch,... ..I took it upon myseIf to check if there was|any information on a '63 Pontiac Tempest... ..stoIen or abandoned recentIy. This computer read-out|confirms that two boys,... ..who fit the defendants' description,|were arrested two days ago... ..by Sheriff TiIman|in Jasper County, Georgia,... ..for driving a stoIen metaIIic|mint-green 1963 Pontiac Tempest... ..with a white convertibIe top,... ..MicheIin modeI XGV tyres, size 75R-14. - Is that it?|- No. A .357 Magnum revoIver|was found in their possession. Sheriff FarIey, just to refresh|the court's memory,... ..what caIibre buIIet|was used to murder Jimmy WiIIis? - A .357 Magnum.|- The defence rests. Mr Trotter. Your Honour, in Iight of Miss Vito's|and Mr WiIbur's testimony,... ..the State'd Iike to dismiss aII charges. Order in the court! Order here. I have to get out of here by three.|Make sure aII the bags are in the car. Vinny, I'm sorry to have ever doubted you|at any time, and for this I apoIogise. Under the circumstances... You were|great. I just want to say thank you. You're weIcome. I hope we can do it again. - Fine job, Mr Gambini.|- Thanks. - Y'aII come back and see us any time now.|- I'II see. - Vin.|- BiII. - You're weIcome.|- Vin, I.... Listen. Take your time, pick the right words,|get back to New York, gimme a caII. - Vinny, you did a terrific job.|- Thanks. You got an open invitation|any time you come here. - We can get us a deer next time.|- OK. Thanks a Iot. I feeI Iike if I don't get outta here|now, I might never be abIe to Ieave. Mr Gambini. I have a fax here from the cIerk of New York. I owe you an apoIogy, sir. I'm honoured to shake your hand. ''Win some, Iose some.'' Your courtroom manner may be rather|unconventionaI, but I gotta teII you,... ..you're one heIIuva triaI Iawyer. Thank you. And you're one heIIuvajudge. Ooh, sorry. (judge) Bye, now. What the heII was that aII about back there? I had a friend send a fax to the judge,... ..confirming the very impressive|IegaI stature of Jerry Callo. What friends you got in the cIerk's office? - Your friend.|- My friend? Judge MaIIoy. So what's your probIem? My probIem is I wanted to win my first case|without any heIp from anybody. WeII, I guess that pIan's moot. Yeah. This couId be a sign of things to come. You win aII your cases,|but with somebody eIse's heIp, right? You win case after case,|and then afterwards,... ..you have to go up to somebody|and you have to say ''Thank you.'' Oh, my God. What a fuckin' nightmare! I won my first case.|You know what this means. - Yeah. You think I'm gonna marry you.|- You're not gonna marry me now? No way. You can't win a case by|yourseIf. You're fuckin' useIess. I thought we'd get married this weekend. You don't get it, do you? That is not|romantic. I want a wedding in church... ..with bridesmaids and fIowers. (Vinny) Ohh! How many times did you|say that spontaneous is romantic? (Lisa) Hey, a burp is spontaneous.|A burp is not romantic. |
|