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Mystify: Michael Hutchence (2019)
Woman: Double-eight, 6-9-5-4.
Man: Nice. Woman: Sydney, Australia calling. Parlez-vous anglais? Man: Oui. Woman: H, Harry. U, uncle. T, Tommy. C, Charlie. Man: Slowly, please. After c, Charlie? Woman: H, Harry. E, Edward. N, Nelly. C, Charlie. E, Edward. Hutchence. Man: Hutchence? Woman: Yes. Michael hutchence. Michael hutchence. Man: Hold the line, please. Woman: Go ahead. Michael: Hello. Donald: Hello, Michael? Michael: Donald! Good morning! Donald: Good morning. Clear the hallway please... Clear the hallway please...! J inxs: Never tear us apart J don't ask me j what you know is true j don't have to tell you j I love ya precious heart ji J I was standing j you were there j two worlds collided j and they could never tear us apart j The amount of experience that you go through in doing what we do is many lifetimes. The problem is holding on to a fixed point for long enough to understand it. That's the difficult part. J exorcise the devils in my mind j Michael: I think to be without at least one love in your life, someone to love you. To be lonely, I think, must be terrible. I always remember him sitting on the floor in Andrew's bedroom, saying, "mr farriss, I'm determined to play something." Which brought roars of laughter, because it was apparent he couldn't and shouldn't bother with an instrument. Michael: Got into a fight at school. Walking around like an english prat from Hong Kong, going, "where's my class? What's going on here?" Got picked on in a fight and Andrew came over and pulled me out. Andrew sucked me into playing music. Yeah. I'm sorry, you just have to give all these buckets of charisma out to people, y'know... And that, of course, was the beginning of the famous six. Timothy, Andrew, Jonathan, kirk pengilly, garry beers. And I'm Michael. Dennis: Michael was not a happy lad. He did not have a happy background. He used to spend a lot of time at our house. He was never in any hurry to go home. I'll simply leave it at that. Michael: I just used to watch 'em and hang out with them, and it was fun, you know? Andrew gave me a microphone and said, "do you wanna sing? I'm trying out these drummers." And that was the beginning of the end. Michael: Hey, Simon, where are you? J inxs: Simple Simon J Simon found love, in love he thinks he found himself j only has a heart for her and her alone j Michael would show me lyrics he'd been working on. I said "these are great. What's your inspiration?" He said, "oh, well, I've had some times" "where I've had to question things, so I read books." "Hermann hesse's siddhartha" "and kahlil gibran's the prophet." There was something different in the way he looked at things, the way he was able to articulate it. I knew he was someone really interesting. I usually can only write about what um.. Seems to apply to myself or my surroundings or my friends, or whatever. So um... It must be that way, I must have... I'll have to explain it that way. J inxs: The loved one j walking like j talking like j wanting like j she comes... j Michael: I used to hang out with ananda. She was a poet. A very young poet. Kind of advanced for her years, really. She got me into all this beat scene, ferlinghetti and Ginsberg. The power of words became apparent to me. On that night, I was in full slave get-up, with all the leather criss-crosses. Hardly anything on at all, except for a collar and a lead. I was with my boyfriend at the time, then I met Michael, and sometime, very soon after that, I was just with Michael. He turned out to be a very sweet-natured person. He didn't have a lot of rules, he just wanted you to be happy. There's no aphrodisiac like being listened to sincerely. He had a genuine artistry, an artist's eye and sensibility about the world and himself. We read books together and we used to listen to lyrics together and work out what they meant. Oscar wilde, Charles bukowski, and Dylan Thomas, under milk wood. I remember him reading the picture of Dorian gray, and he really loved that image of there being a picture somewhere where all your evil and bad living shows up and you remain youthful and sweet. J well, I love her so j ananda: Michael used to say that he didn't know what love was. So, I would go, "I love you," and he would go, "t don't know what love is." J anytime I say j ananda: During that time, men in suits kept turning up. Band management, they seemed to have lots of plans for these young men. I go down to the stagedoor tavern. This little band comes on stage. Next minute, this quirky, little, skinny guy came on and I was like, "hmm." So I went backstage and introduced myself to them. I said, "ok, guys, this thing about management, "t'll only do it on the basis that we do it internationally." Michael's hand went up like a schoolkid. He goes, "yes! I'm in!" So, I said, "ok. It's gonna very serious. "I'm gonna work you guys like dogs." We played and played and played everywhere. Hundreds of shows a year. Until the record companies had to sign us, 'cause we had such a big audience. Molly: When are you touring? - We are touring right now. - This Monday we start. - Right and we take off for about two or three weeks, everywhere. And it was five, six shows a week. Melbourne on a Saturday, back to do a Sydney show on Sunday. Two shows on a Sunday. Michael was just one of the guys. One big happy family. Michael always just had that aura about him. The other five guys felt that, as well. He always had star qualities. It was just a matter of getting that to the world. When Michael began to realise and get the confidence that he could sing things he believed in, that's when it all really started to happen for us. He really wanted to be a real artist of some kind, working towards a lifelong body of work. He was working very practically towards becoming famous. I didn't know how profoundly meaningful it was to him. His desire for fame really fell into context for me when I met his mum. J serge Gainsbourg: Je t'aime... moi non plus Michael: My parents used to have good parties occasionally and play a lot of soul music and that kind of stuff. Always there'd be this period of the night when they would put on this record by serge Gainsbourg called je t'aime. J je vais, je vais et je viens j Michael: That would be the signal for the kids to go. So we'd always go, "oh, not this song!" We had no idea, really, what it meant. But I do remember it being a very evocative atmosphere and the sexuality of it being very strong. That impressed me that a piece of music could have such an impact on a room. My sister, who's a bit older, she was a go-go dancer. She used to rehearse with her girlfriends in the house. I liked the rehearsals. A lot of motown stuff, everything. A lot of music. The supremes, dionne, Diana Ross, James brown. I always had a soft spot for the Beatles, especially John Lennon. The Bee Gees doing... J lonely days j lonely nights & electric warrior, 'cause I just loved Marc bolan. Aretha Franklin's voice singing respect, that got me into singing. Man, over pa: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Hong Kong. The local time is 5:18pm. On behalf of... Michael: My dad's a real wanderer. A bit like me. He's been all over the place. We just moved to Hong Kong. He was a manager for gande price that imported all the moet & chandon. That's why we had so many parties. We lived at the Hong Kong Hilton for the first two months. Michael: My room. Tina: The boys thought that was just our house. They'd jump in the lifts, they knew how to push those buttons and they'd go up and down. Mother and I would be up and down trying to find them. I was managing a childrenswear department. We needed a little fashion show, so naturally I grabbed the boys. Michael was probably nine or ten. The day of, Rhett just got out there and he's making faces. Michael's not so sure about this. He's looking, and then I sort of pushed him on there, and all of a sudden, he walked out, and he did see the people, his face changed. He got into it, he started really enjoying himself. Turned around, he's winking at me, which surprised me, because he was a shy kid. Michael's report cards always said things like, "Michael is a dreamer. Michael doesn't concentrate. "Michael won't get anywhere if he keeps this up. He was a dreamer. We didn't know what he was dreaming about. When he said he was going to sing with this band, that just surprised the heck out of me. Here's this kid who didn't wanna walk into a roomful of people, let alone sing. Anticipation! Anxiety attack! J Michael hutchence: Spill the wine there was just a presence, something behind me, someone staring, and I didn't know who he was, I didn't look. He was really shy, but he did make a point of walking up and asking if I was leaving. I didn't think too much more about it, until I met him again. He just eyeballed me. When he focuses on you, it's hard to ignore. It draws you in and draws things out. I'd never experienced anything like that. He was just very, very different from anyone I'd met. It swept me off my feet. He came across as a little bit pretentious, because he started to spout sartre and camus and existentialism. I think he thought it was pretty impressive. Michele: I think you'd be really boring if you stay here. Yeah? I'd just contemplate all the time. Michele: You'd contemplate and philosophise. I know. I would, actually. Michele: Mm. Michael: I got a really old 1919 citroen, which I drove from Melbourne to Sydney. And it was great, it was wonderful. It was the best car I've ever driven in my life. Michele: I just put all my things in this car that wasn't registered. I didn't know he didn't have a licence. Michele: And we moved to this house in Paddington. Michele walked through the door, and it was this drop-dead gorgeous young girl. Michael: Michele. Michele! Jenny: Immediately very warm and funny and I loved her right from the first moment. Michael: Happy... They were like two peas in a pod. The wild hair and the big smiles. That was true love to me. Hello, this is Michael hutchence's wildlife documentary. Over here we have what's commonly known as London bridge. J born free j he was a drifter. I don't remember him ever having a stack of records or a record player or anything. You sort of came, one night, into Michele's room, there were all these clothes strewn around the floor, and that was Michael. You just knew he deeply loved her, you knew he was in awe of her and he really felt he had a little family in that house, to be loved and to be cared about and supported, and we did. J well, you know I love... j Michele: He loved christmases, and he needed his own little tribe around him. He didn't wanna go on tour, he just wanted to stay in the house with us, because it was a load of fun. Just fucking at the party. Nick: Once he was nearly in tears going away and saying, "I just wanna stay here with you guys." See you. Michele: Bye! Michael: Oh, yes! Let me hear all you! Fucking hell! Hello, we're inxs. From Sydney. The audiences were suddenly out there, knew the words, and we were getting some great reactions, surprising reactions. J inxs: The one thing j well, you know just what you do to me j the way you move j soft and slippery j he was really, like, a rock star waiting to happen. They just needed to have the hit records. He was the complete package. Which is a really strange thing to come across. Very strange. At that point, it was just unrelenting touring. Arriving in one city, sound check, playing, driving through the night to the next place. He'd never stay in any place long enough to experience a city or its culture. And I just loathed it. Michael: Yeah. Michele, where are we? - San Fran... Michael: Francisco. J with flowers... j New Orleans! Michele: He didn't like being apart. He didn't like being apart from his friends, either. He wanted you to be with him. He did not like to be alone. He needed to feel like he belonged somewhere, and I think that is part of the reason why inxs was a family to him. Hi, Michele. This is us in London. See you very soon. Miss you very much. Nick: He loved coming home to the house. He missed it. She was her own person and she didn't take the bullshit, and very easily could see through people, someone who wasn't genuine, and she had no problems about showing it. Michael: My Michele, we're going home now. Are you driving? Nick: Michael did love that about her. What?! You can't have an ice-cream! I'm sick of you asking all the time, Michele! Are you filming? Oh... honey. Like the view? It's nice, huh? I'm so glad we came out here. Let's go to the us top five for this week, and look at number five, what you need, inxs. Michael: Yeah! Hey! What do you need? Chris came into a show in Tokyo, and he came backstage and he said, "oh, that was the best gig I've ever seen in my life." We thought, "this guy's pretty enthusiastic. We decided to go in the studio and see what could happen. Andrew brought in this demo of this riff and I thought, "wow!" I thought, "James brown! Everybody's gonna dance to it." And we started it the next day, and on the Friday night, I took a rough mix to Benny's, and I asked them to pop this on. And it had an immediate physical effect on everybody in there, and I thought, "yeah, I think we've cracked it." J inxs: What you need j hey, here is the story j forget about your troubles in life & ciao. Michael: It was incredible. You suddenly get this feeling that people know who you are and you really exist in their lives and their minds and they really are enjoying it and enjoying your music, and it's a great feeling and it really urges you on. Cor, that's beautiful! You just don't see it in Australia, do you? J give you what you need, I give you what you need, yeah! J he was always the first person to arrive at the studio. He was really watching everything. He was the one who had a real idea of where things should go. He really did have an instinct for the whole thing. I was learning stuff from him! He wrote most of the top lines for those songs, the actual tune that the singer sings. He wasn't just writing words, he was writing melodies. J; Well, there ain't no sense in all your crying j just pick it up and throw it into shape j oh, what do you say? J Chris: Michael off-stage was as far removed as a rock star as was possible. He was one of the loveliest people I've ever met, without any question of a doubt. She's from Australia! He had such a presence about him. He could look you in the eye and make you feel like you're the only person in the room. And he could do it if you were a male or a female, he could do it to kids, he could do it to animals. He just had that way about him. Andrew farriss on keyboards. I don't think Michael was a particularly good singer when we first started, he was just a good guy who was my friend. But he developed, unbelievably exponentially as a talent, as a person, on stage and as a singer. Michael became a really good singer. An amazing singer. I don't really know how to describe it. Hey-oh! J helpless baby j evil child & it really bothers me that he didn't really understand just how great a voice he had. J you want me aga-a-ain j bono: He had this fragility just underneath the bravado. He just sang with such passion and such incredible personality. He just became an incredible singer. A really incredible singer. J baby, that's all right j oh, that's a-a-all right j oh! J we've never changed a key in our life. Michael sang anything that we wrote, with a full voice, with a low voice, night after night, week after week. He never missed a beat. J red dress on j long black hair & I remember asking Michael what his definition of rock and roll was. He said, "liberation." J anytime I say, now j anytime I say, now j oh, baby... j he always wanted to be stimulated in terms of music and art. He was motivated more by getting creative satisfaction out of what he was doing and making his Mark. This isn't what you think it is on a plane. We wouldn't do that. We'd spend mind-numbing hours talking to Michael about theatre, art, literature, painting, all the pretentious, nobby stuff that we kind of got into, and there was certainly a plethora of things that seemed to be much more interesting than pop music. I'm reading les enfants terribles by cocteau. Woman: Ooh! - It's really good. Woman: Is it? - Yeah. Woman: Are you reading it in the French? No. No, sorry. Woman: You were just showing off, giving me the French title. Yeah, I was just showing off. Woman: So you're an intellectual. English. But actually... No, I'm not intellectual. I know some intellectuals. That's why I know I'm not an intellectual! He had some spirit that made his persona an extension of how he was. The person that you saw as a performer had the same generosity of spirit that he had as a human being. Michael told me around that time that he felt that Michele was too good for him. That she held him too tight a moral line. Michele: Here we go. We broke up, got back together, broke up, got back together, and then this one time, where he said, "no, no, this is the time it's gonna work," that's when I said, "you must spend some time on your own "and just think about what you want, "because I don't believe this is what you want." The whole thing was a disaster, and I remember him just ringing me up and just saying, "you've made me do this, and it's just the worst idea. When he came back to Sydney, it was torturous. We were just coming at things from completely different directions and it was not working. Michael ripped the band-aid off. He called it, and it was very hurtful, but it was the best thing to do. He threw it back on me, that I was never satisfied, I wasn't happy, and he couldn't change anything and I couldn't change anything. He just saw it for what it was, whereas I was hoping for some sort of solution, and I don't know what that would have been. I've never seen her as distraught. It just tore into me, because she was like family to me. And I was sitting there beside her and she just had no idea, "why is he doing this? "What's going on? Why have you done this?" The one person who's the best thing in your life. He did love her. I know he did. They were an absolutely delightful couple, destined to be together forever. He was very unhappy about that. The connection between them was phenomenal. For years and years afterwards, almost with every relationship he had, he was always calling her. J inxs: Never tear us apart J don't ask me jq Michael: Er... Well, it's kinda personal. J I love your precious heart jit Michael: I don't make up love songs, so... It's definitely a song for a girl called Michele. Michael: Yeah, she knows, but we're not together anymore, so it doesn't work, does it? J and they could never tear us apart j Michael hutchence, he's hot, he's rad. He's, like, the thing right now, and I want him. All: Michael hutchence. So sexy! J for a thousand years j but if I hurt youd Michael: Things just got bigger and bigger as we went along, and you're thinking "this can't keep happening." Oh, it was very exciting. It was a long tour, it was a year and a half, and it felt like ten by the end of it. Come over here. Owl! J inxs: Need you tonight It was just massive. The kick album changed everything. We wanted to get success, we didn't dream it was gonna become quite that intense. I never really, actually, consciously went around going, "we wanna be big," and all that stuff. I'm a very unconsciously purposeful person. So, from the fantasy to the reality, that, "oh, this is actually happening," that became very tricky, because I wasn't very comfortable with it. So I've invented a persona to deal with the necessity of getting through it. I enjoyed it, but I had to create something that kept me inside, as well. There's probably three people, maybe four or five, there's probably a person that does interviews, as well. J I've got to let you know j you're one of my kind, oh j Molly: And the winner is... - Inxs. - Inxs. - Inxs. - Inxs! - Inxs! Yo! Support animal and human rights. And hello, mum. J there's something about you, girl j that makes me sweat, now j "inxs is the first non-American group "to land six consecutive top ten hits in the hot 100 "since culture club in 1983/'84." Wow! I don't like the idea of goals, I don't like the idea of success. It's very limiting. And as soon as you say you're successful, then that's it, you might as well stop. Whatever success means. I'm not quite sure what success means. Man: For the second year in a row, the Australian music industry recognises the outstanding achievement of inxs. Two weeks ago, they entered the us top five with what you need... We all knew the ground was shifting, so we could only imagine how intense it must have been for Michael, as well. Absolutely, he was overworked. The day was always filled. He would go on 20 interviews a day, then have to do a show, then have to go to the next city. And everyone wanted a piece of him. Need a cigarette after that. Touring... It's two hours a day... But... You know, they're the two hours that I really enjoy. You've got 22 other hours a day that all kinds of weird things happen. And the three months out on the road mean nothing. It's only two hours a day that matter. That's how I work. That's why I'm here. Michael was different. He needed different things. He was a different animal. I'm not miserable about it at all. I mean, I enjoy it. But um... It definitely started to take its toll on him. The continual grind of inxs, well, I think it played on all of them. Man: Anything to say before the gig? No. I'm just a bit tired, actually. I wouldn't mind going home to sleep. It's a lot of hours. About another three months. They were the hardest-working band that I'd ever known. They needed to be treated with a bit more respect, I thought. It was a whirlwind, and he was the lead guy and a cover guy. This was a lot to take on. 'Cause he was still a young man. Michael: You have to really take a step back from yourself and make it a hobby to be normal or something. If you don't, you lose what you started with, you know? It's as simple as that. At the grammys, which were in New York, being aired worldwide, Michael walked on stage with his hair really short. Not the most attractive Michael. Michael: I got sick of myself. There was a lot of people out there that sort of looked like me, I think, or I looked like them, and I just didn't want any part of it anymore. Michael came to me and he said, "t wanna do a solo album. I said, "you can't. It's crazy. You'll look like an idiot." There's very few solo acts that sell through, and the fanbase doesn't really follow you, because they see you as a deserter, 'cause they're into the army concept. I said, "well, you can do it without me. "I'm not gonna take part of it." Martha: Chris hated the idea. His view was, "you are going to mess up everybody's career." J I'm sitting in a bar j staring at the universe that's in my drink j the motion of my straw j is stirring anti-clockwise in the glass 7 Michael: I got together some infamous musicians from Melbourne, who were really good. Ji recall the moment j Ollie Olsen and Gus till were extremely talented, as everyone else was. It just kind of unfolded. It was an experiment with all kinds of people. I've heard of a few of his bands, I knew about his past and I knew that he was trying to do something musically that I hadn't got anywhere near, that's for sure. J older and more stupid... J the years have etched stupidity into my skull j I condemn my foolishness... & given at the point he was with the pop group, I find it admirable that he would want to take a detour and pursue something that had much more of an art thrust. And that dichotomy makes Michael more interesting than your average pop singer of the time. Ollie was just one of those rare folk who occasionally taps into something genuinely original or brilliant or just stunning, and I think Michael saw that. J idea of business at all j Chris: There's an emotional intensity that sometimes pop music doesn't allow you. I think that's what he was after, his own version of a primal scream. One thing that must be said about Michael, despite trying to put him into some kind of sexy rock god, pop singer thing, he actually wanted to be an artist and recognised as being an artist. That was his achilles' heel, that he thought other people were better artists, they got credit for being artists, where he got credit for being able to shake his arse and be like a sex god. Man: And now Max q. Man 2: And now Max q. J sometimes J sometimes j I can't believe my brain j Martha: Chris flies in. Chris goes, "look, I've got the greatest marketing idea. "We are gonna pretend it's not you. "That way, this will never hurt you, it won't hurt inxs." Brilliant man, Chris Murphy, and great marketing ideas, but this one was his worst. J sometimes j I go up and meet with the record company and played some tracks, then that guy rang Chris and said, "mate, Gary's playing some of the Max q stuff. "T love it." Chris's reaction was, "how dare you do that! "You have nothing to do with Max q." J when the power strikes you blind j they can see it in your eyes j and it doesn't take too much to read j too much to read your mind j I kept getting calls, "how's it doing? How's it doing?" "How's what doing?" How am I working something that we're not supposed to use Michael? So ridiculous! J sometimes j Martha: That's when Michael lost his feeling for this person he loved very much. He just felt like, "how could you not see "that I need to do other things?" That pretty much ended their friendship and their relationship. I think it confused him, whether he wanted to be part of inxs and whether he wanted to take on all the pressures of being Michael hutchence. J ..On yourself j on yourself j Michael: Why did I do that? I did that in a perverse reaction to what had happened to the band and to me. And I had a hell of a time. Except I forgot to tell the band I was gonna do it. I'll never forget Andrew calling, going, "I just saw you on television in your new band. "What's it called?" "Oh, Max q." "Ar." Man: Are you the captain of the inxs ship, as well? No, I'm not. I'm just a part of a collective group of people. I'm the mutineer, and I take over. He's in charge of mutiny. J riding in a boat j in Amsterdam city j looking pretty good j how many songs on the new album are about sex? Um... Uh... Well, probably most of them, one way or another. J Nick cave & Kylie Minogue: Where the wild roses grow J they call me the wild Rose j but my name was Elisa day j; Why they call me that, I do not know j; For my name was Elisa day j Michael: Kylie... Kylie. J on the first day I saw her... j I went to see inxs play a gig in Sydney. We were invited back to the hotel. That's where I first spoke to Michael, in his hotel room after a gig. This one point, he and I were sat on the edge of the bed, talking about something to help you with your vocals if you run into trouble as a performer. He was telling me about these kind of magical drops for your throat. That was our, kind of, first bond. I was going to Hong Kong shortly after that, and he asked if he could take me to dinner in Hong Kong and give me the magic potion, which now, I think, was pretty much a ruse. So, I'm in Hong Kong with my manager, my mother, my hairdresser and about six dancers. The clock ticks, the time passes. There's no sign of him, and my team are just getting really riled about this. Eventually, he rocks up, two hours late. So, we do go out, he takes me out, and clearly there was something between us, a frisson. J and I said, "do you know where the wild roses grow j "so sweet and Scarlet and free?" Kylie: I don't know how long it was after Hong Kong, but he asked if it would be ok if he could fly to Kyoto to see me. He flew over, we were free, no-one really recognised either of us. Our relationship was solidified there. Yeah, it was... We-we became... We became a couple. J they call me the wild Rose j Kylie: Sex, love, food, drugs, music, travel, books, you name it, he wanted to experience it. So, as his partner, I got to experience a lot of that, as well. I felt very safe with him, I felt protected. Man: Ok, ok. We are now on the orient express on June 26th. This is an American couple filming this young Australian couple, who are here to have a great time. You're on the air! Michael? Woman: Aw! Kyle's really not the person that people think she is. Because we can understand each other's experience, how much it takes, the pressures, all that sort of thing, there's a lot of equality, a lot of strength, a lot of support for each other, 'cause you're both going through that sort of stuff. Kylie's got this real sweet, innocent image, what the hell is she doing with me? And vice-versa. Oh... - Cut! - Cut! The storybook of this is that he's, like, the dark, bad boy and I was the pure, good girl. And that was pretty much the truth. Michael: Got one? Kylie: If you're a sensual being, all of your senses need stimulation. He definitely awakened my desire for other things in my world. He loved seeing me experiencing a new wine, or me learning about a new pleasure. A lot of it was based around pleasure, let's face it. Michael: Kylie... Kylie. Kylie: We went on the orient express, went to see the statue of David. You know, I'm crying. I'm like, "this didn't happen on my school excursion, "why is it happening with you?" Kylie: One of the first ways I would describe Michael is insatiable curiosity. All the good things in life and some of the bad things in life. It opened up a whole new world for me. It really did. Then the problem was just scheduling, finding the time to see each other. Michael: Got our managers with the computers out, trying to align our lives so that we're not on tour and stuff at different ends of the world all the time. Kylie: A lot of our relationship was faxing from one hotel to another hotel. Kylie: The fax was the current technology to send a personal message, and, of course, that had to go through reception, be printed, put in an envelope, put under your door. You couldn't write anything too personal. It was very exciting to see that envelope and open it and see what's the message today, and to see his handwriting and what he would write. They were our 1990s love notes. Very cute. Jones is my mother's maiden name and Gabby was our dog! And his was swordfish. I don't know why. Swordfish! Not the best speller, I have to say. I'll film you. It's still on. Movie star! Kylie: Oh! - Movie star in Italy! Kylie: In Italy! Kylie: I just think, for me, we met at the perfect time, because I was old enough to take care of myself, but young enough to just see and feel and experience all this new stuff. Man: Isn't it beautiful? Michael: It's fantastic. Kylie: He gave me a book, which I loved, which was perfume: The story of a murderer. And he gave it to me when we were in the south of France.. Black cherries. Michael: Got one? Michael: There we go. A cherry tree. Both: Mmm! - Aren't they lovely? - They're great! Wow! They're divine! Kylie: That was a really poignant book to give me at the time, 'cause it was about discovery and obsession, addiction and the senses. One night, like, four in the morning, he rousted me out of bed. He wanted to show us this area that was from the book perfume. He smells everything so acutely and unbelievably well. He spends 20 years of his life smelling everything. But he has no smell of his own. He says, "well, I'll make my own smell. Make a human smell." But it's not good enough. And then one day, he smells a smell, it smells like peaches. He follows this smell across the left bank, onto the right bank in Paris. He comes to a window... There's a young virgin girl eating peaches. He has never seen anything like her. He's never known about a woman or a girl. He makes 20 perfumes out of 20 virgins. Until he's the most notorious murderer in the world. He escapes to these mountains. These mountains here. This is where they grow all the flowers for all the perfume in the world. Here. Right here. Like my house, the lavender I showed you, all around here. He is the greatest perfumer in all of the world. Eventually he says, "I'll go back to Paris "and I'll say I'm sorry." And he comes back, and they catch him. All of Paris goes insane! They're gonna behead him. He says, "I have one last wish. Give me my bag "give me my bag! And he put all the perfumes into one, and he goes, "pssh! Perfume comes out across Paris. The whole city turns into an orgy. They tear him apart! Man: Kylie! Man: Kylie! Michael: I've never come across paparazzi like that, which is a bit of a shock. Being in so much limelight, it doesn't let you naturally evolve. Woman: How do you think about following up something like kick? You try not to. Michael: The leaps we'd made in such a short period of time were pretty substantial. So, we felt like we had to make another one. I think we got a little lost in there. I guess, in some ways, you start believing that you're capable of anything. But all you're capable of doing is being true to yourself, if possible. Because of his creativity, I think he was scared of repeating himself, which is the reason why he started to do a bit of writing with jonny. Jonny played me this demo and Michael started singing the bits of words he'd written. Came to the bit where he starts going, "doo-doo, doo-doo. "De-de-de... I haven't written the words for that bit." I said, "you have. You just sing that!" J doo-doo-doo j doo, doo-doo j j doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo j doo-doo-doo-doo j doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo, doo-doo-doo j doo-doo-doo j Chris: There was a very, very unpleasant face-off between Andrew and Michael. Andrew and Chris Murphy didn't wanna have disappear on the record, because Andrew hadn't written it. It was very nasty. Michael didn't really answer back. Somehow we managed to force it onto the record, and, of course, it was the biggest single that they had in America off that album. J you're so fine j I lose my mind j and the world seems to disappear j all the problems j all those fears j and the world seems to disappear j through it all, he really had a sense of what was good and proper. I know he never would've wanted to hurt anyone. He did end up hurting me, but he wouldn't have enjoyed it one bit. Ok, ready? One, two, three. All: Kylie says hello to Michael! I'm gonna make a schoolteacher yet! Message to Michael video. Say hi. - Hi. - Hi this is a video to Michael. - Is it? - Yeah. - Hi, Michael. - Hi, Michael! All: Hi, Michael! - Mum and Yvonne. - Hil Kylie: I was in Japan again, and things were not going well. This trip that I had to do to get to him in New York was ridiculous on an already ridiculous schedule. He picked me up at the airport in New York in a limousine, met me at the gate. It felt loving, yet sad, and probably doomed. We talked through things, and I couldn't give you an actual reason. But the room was dark, the curtains were drawn, I didn't know what to do, I didn't know what was happening. Like, "where have you gone?" I don't know if that was associated with any guilt of having to break my heart and know what I would go through after that. Was it work? Was it drugs? I don't know. I just know he was like a broken man. I'd never seen any man like that before. It was like he was cocooning himself into this... Like, you know, rolled in a ball in there. It was... Yeah. So, I left pretty confounded and destroyed, and I knew that was it. Yeah, he broke my heart. I have to confess, the hurt stays for quite a long time. Whispers: 'Cause I can't stop thinking about you. Kylie: I think I realised in that time that this was beyond me, it was a bigger story. Michael: Sometimes, no matter how much love two people can have for each other, it doesn't always make things right and it's not always the right thing to be together. It could be the worst thing they can do. My mother was very aware that when she walked into a room, all eyes would go toward her. Through her whole life. My mother had been a very successful model. They really didn't have makeup artists around at that time, so she started to learn. My mother's mother raised me till I was 11, I don't remember my dad. Kell was so charming. He really did have that David niven look about him. They were married within a month. They were very much the couple about town, going to lots of dinner parties, very glamorous, a lot of models, lots of very attractive friends. I didn't go to live with her until she was six-months pregnant with Michael. It was quite a volatile marriage from the start. Mother and kell had this lifestyle, but they had this baby. They were both used to being single. My mother was not really prepared for this little baby that would take up so much time and change her life so much. And neither was kell. His job always took him overseas, from two weeks to two months. Mother had 12, 14-hour days. I don't think they had thought it through. They just left him with me. And it was for longer and longer periods of time. I was a good babysitter. My mother would be working on a commercial, I'd come home from school, the babysitter would hand Michael to me. It was us. I would just love in the mornings if I could be the first one into the nursery, and Michael would be standing up in his cot. He was a very smiley baby. Very, very happy, easy-going baby. He was mine. Michael was about two-and-a-half when Rhett arrived. That was much harder. Michael was a pleaser. You really didn't hear, "no," from him. Where Rhett, his first word was 'no'. It was so obvious that Michael was the chosen one. Rhett felt it. You knew that this child was feeling it. He was a really angry kid. Woman: Why didn't you take singing lessons? I was 12, Michael was about 14. We both got off the bus, walking home, there was a car in the driveway that I hadn't seen before. And I got to the house, opened up the front door and I noticed that some of the stuff in the living room was all packed up. Mum came down, she literally had two airplane tickets flapping in her hand. There was a little old lady standing behind her. Mum said to Michael, "I want you to pack your bag," and there was a suitcase on his bed. Mum explained to me that they were going to America. I had to go to the airport and I was screaming and crying, "please take me with you." Michael just wanted to get away from the scene, the screaming. It was just too much. And so he dragged mum through immigration and off they went. She took Michael away for a year-and-a-half and left me with this dial-an-angel lady. Come on, everybody. Rhett! Rhett! Man: It's a family shot. I had a phone call. It was the middle of the night, and it was kell. He was sobbing. "She's left and she's taken my Michael." My dad was shell-shocked. He had no idea this was coming, at all. Tina: Rhett was at the airport. That's the terrible, heart-wrenching thing. Michael knew for three months, at least, before... I asked him if we should do it, if he'd like to come with me. And he said, "yes." He kept it a secret, as I did. Michael knew that he was going. I heard it from him so many times, he will never forget leaving his brother Rhett behind. It just tore him apart. He felt like he didn't deserve the success. He felt guilt. When they finally came back a year-and-a-half later, Mike was a lot bigger, a lot smarter, dressed differently, and he had a sense of self for the first time. I didn't have any direction in life of what I wanted to be or where I wanted to go. He let me go for a long time doing what I was doing, because no matter what love he'd put in, it wasn't manifesting in my stopping. Of course, he didn't wanna have to identify my body in @a morgue one day, he just wanted me to be doing the normal things. I think he felt that he needed to step in and point me in the right direction. There was one point in my life where he gave me a hard love thing. I went to rehab in '92. After the rehab, I think he saw that I was trying to make a change and he brought me back into his life again. He always thought I had potential. He always told me I could do whatever I wanted. Some people are like this, and all of us are like it at one time or another. People use something to take care of that, to kill the pain. Michael: Love? Mm! Love is a many splendid thing... It was around 3:00am, I was sleeping, and the phone rang. It was herb. We had just done the Chris isaak video. He goes, "hey, Helena! "No, I'm just here with a friend of mine. "You should talk to this guy. His name is Michael." Helena: Is that a joint? Michael: No. Sorry. Michael: You know what, I had a pretty good time here. If you wanna come by, it'd be great. Don't kill yourself, but if you're still up, you know... Michael: We have dogs, we have geese, we have chickens, we have lions, and we have woman! Helena: We have ducks, we have geese, we have love, we have peace. And everything else you dream of. Michael: We were match-mates, to be honest. And then we started talking over the days, and we didn't see each other for two months. Then we met, eventually. I brought her coffee and a Danish. Helena: He just seemed so joyful. Sweet, deep and emotional, kind, profound and funny. Total mental and physical chemistry. Michael: I'm in love and living in Paris. Helena: This is a record... This is a recording. This is a recording. Michael: This is virtual reality. Helena: Sure. It's happening right now. Here we have a rock star of our times. How do you feel having such an adorable chest? Helena: What a wonderful heart. Man: This afternoon, you're gonna be able to see Jesus Jones, Deborah Harry, hothouse flowers and inxs! Helena: And, oh, my god, he was so intoxicatingly good on that stage, you know? It just elevated your mood. He just becomes one with the music. I was blown away. J inxs: Bitter tears j in the hour j of your needs, yeah j your lips are trembling j 'cause you're gonna be free j realise what we're doing here j the time is right to kill your fears j bitter tears j they taste so sweet, honey j I'm seeing my way j for the first time in years j Michael had that very alluring, magnetic energy about him. You know when there's one person in a room that has a special light and everyone's drawn to that? That was him. When we finally had time together, it would be Paris, where I was living, and he would come and stay with me. So, that's probably the city that we spent most time in. And then south of France in the summers. Tonight we've got a special report on the south of France and I'm so lucky to have some of my best friends among me. Michael: Ok, ok. Can we record this? J I wanna be loved by you j nobody else but you j I wanna be loved by you j be-doo, be-doo, ba-ba-be-doo j Helena: It was like an explosion of intense personalities all wanting to have fun. And we would drive from house to house, have lunch in one place, dinner in another place, party in a third. It was the most decadent, wonderful times that I've had in my life. He loved his home down there. We have this gorgeous young lad sitting over here by the left, and he looks very mischievous, doesn't he? And he will now speak into this little speaker, telling us about his innermost feelings. Michael: Yeah, well, the thing is, it's just great being here, sitting around these beautiful women, having a wonderful time. It's all gonna be fabulous. See you soon. Michael: Helena! Look at that! Helena: He loved women, but he was very committed when he was with somebody. Very homey, really. He wanted to just nest. We walk into this olive grove. He says, "you know the thing about olive trees?" I said, "what?" He says, "they're immortal. He says, "there's olive trees that go back 2,000 years. "There's olive trees older than christianity." I said, "these ones?" He said, "I don't think so, but they're old, "and we'll never be." I would get calls from kell to say, "do you know where Michael is?" And I'd get calls from mother. They wouldn't call each other. And then Michael realised that if he would suggest it, the two of them would come. We were all there. It was the most wonderful Christmas. Michael was the centre. I'm taking a shot of Michael's house in roquefort-les-pins... In France. It's about 8:30 in the morning and it's just beautiful down here. Just absolutely exquisite. It was '85 when I met up with kell, who had come over to work in Hong Kong, because China was opening up. He had actually been divorced ten years at that point. We met, had dinner at the Hong Kong club, and a year later we were married. J la, la, la, la. Susie: Michael and Rhett were at the wedding. A very happy, happy event. Michael had gone through a bit of a tumultuous time as far as his parents, but when he came back to Hong Kong, it was like he found his father again, and he was so happy and, of course, so was kell. One night, we were in Ian kwai fong, kell and I were dining, and Michael was there with another group. He came up and he joined us and he was so happy and he said to me, "isn't he an angel?" He was a gentleman and he was a charmer, and every time I introduced a girl to my dad, the first thing they said when they walked away was, "I love your dad." Kell was like that. Always fussing over women, making them feel terrific. He made you feel at ease. Michael just learned that, just watching. Man: How would you actually like to celebrate the turn of the century? Michael: Not that far away, is it? Yeah, well, I'll be 40. Well, I made a deal with my old man that we'd be sitting around, having a bottle of champagne. So, let's hope that happens. We were riding home on our bikes and we stopped to get pizza. He was stopped in the middle of a tiny, very narrow road and was eating his pizza. This insane taxi driver yelled at Michael to move, got out of his car and punched him. Helena: He fell backwards and hit the kerb. He was unconscious and there was blood coming out of his mouth and ear. I thought he was dead. We get to the hospital and he woke up and was aggressive. They were trying to make him stay, but he was physically pushing them away. They thought he was drunk. He insisted he wanted to go, and they let him go. What I don't understand is why the hospital didn't keep him. For a month he lay in bed in my apartment. He was throwing up most of the time. He should've been in hospital, but he was aggressively against it. I would bring him food, but most of it he would just push away. Like, he got almost violent. This dark, very angry side came out in him, and it was only when he slowly, after a month, got out of that state, that he was able to make the decision in going to Paris to see a highly-esteemed surgeon. He got the scan. He had a fissure to his skull and the nerves had been torn. He most likely would never regain his sense of smell and taste. He did not want me to tell anyone. He didn't even allow me to tell my parents. We kept seeing doctors, and were always told that that would be impossible. He broke down, and he would be like, "I'm never gonna be able to smell my baby. "When I have a child, I will never smell that child." Things just got really heavy in his head. Michael: My head was smashed onto a road. I spent a couple of weeks sort of talking in tongues and stuff. Finally... I'm fine now, but the... The good thing about it is uh... These kind of experiences really sort you out a lot and they make you realise... You know, you get your... They make you realise what's important, what's not important in your life and uh... So, I've been happy for it in a way. A strange way. Just after the accident, we went to the island of Capri to make full moon, dirty hearts. And right from the get-go, Michael was kinda different. I remember him smashing Andrew's really beautiful, vintage acoustic guitar one night, just for fun, and it was like, "wow, what's happened to Michael?" He just didn't seem himself at all. It was quite clear that Michael was suffering from some serious brain damage. And Michael, ordinarily, was not an aggressive, confrontational or violent person. You can take your fucking... Jon: I felt this incredible overwhelming sense of sadness, "this is not the Michael that I know." You never knew what you were gonna get. Some days he was really normal Michael, and then other days he was just this aggressive, violent monster. Virtually was bipolar. He was just very erratic in his behaviour, but also in what we were trying to do musically. He certainly had got sucked into the grunge thing, and there was a lot of times where he would stop everything and go, "you gotta listen to this. "This is what we're gonna be doing." So I had huge arguments with Michael over that. He was trying to make it a lot more not inxs. Things were magnified. Erratic conversations, obsessive conversations, repeating of conversations. That wasn't him. Complete mind blank here. Sorry. We went... Do you have any notes? The producer, yeah. Man: I'm sure I've got notes on the producer. Yes, I'm sure you do. Bloody hell. Man: Nick launay? - Nick launay? Man: There you go. - I lost it. Michael: I spent about a year what I call 'sensitising'. And it's like taking your knuckles and rubbing them raw and really... Really feeling things. Not just having knowledge, but feeling. Really feeling. For someone like Michael, losing the sense that really gives you that primal connection to sensual hedonism, which is the sense of smell, that would be really devastating to someone who is already engineered that way. That would have also really crushed someone who lived the rock star dream of exuding this sensuality and sexuality as he was singing and performing and just being him. His experience of food would've been totally denuded. Michael: Here's what we can do, we can barbecue a whole one, and you get, from the actual garden... We barbecue it in twigs - wrapped in twigs. Rachel: All he would be experiencing is the feel of foods in his mouth, creaminess or crunchiness. People don't understand how important the sense of smell is until they lose it. The part of the brain where smell is processed and the part of the brain where emotions and associations get formed are directly linked. When people lose their sense of smell, they start losing their sense of self. Like they're floating in outer space. You can still see things, you can hear things, but there's this absence and this emptiness. It gets worse over time, it doesn't get better. It becomes more of an obvious loss, more of a hole in one's being. People don't mind if you kill yourself. They're quite happy about it! A lead story, yeah. Well, I hope I don't become a lead story. There was never so much conflict as post pushbike accident. There was quite a significant change in Michael. He was very, very moody, he didn't handle alcohol anywhere near like he used to, and he seemed to crave more danger in his life, whether it be with the relationships or drugs or anything. That was the start of Michael's rage against the world. Andrew says the only thing we've got in common is that we're in inxs. Which I think is... In some ways fairly true. 'Cause I search for reasons why we still like to get in a room together. Definitely. 'Cause you better have a really good reason after 17 years. It's more than half my life, you know? Things changed after the bicycle accident. I think he was very, very traumatised. He confessed to me that it changed everything for him. What was just a sweet insecurity became a deep insecurity. He kinda lost his way and forgot who he was. There were many comparisons with U2 and inxs. He loved U2, he respected them, but it made him feel more insecure. He was frustrated, because they went from really huge venues, including Wembley, to this additional idea of, "let's make the venues very small," like going back to pubs. I had agents calling me, record companies calling me, saying this is the most ludicrous thing. That was a very big mistake. Things started going the other way. He had a very bad sense of separating the good from the bad, or the ones who were just taking advantage. He should have just been around good people at all times, and unfortunately he got dragged into something else. Helena: He was so extremely talented, but always feeling like he wasn't. I had not experienced depression in anyone, so I didn't really know how to deal with it. I started building up walls, because it saddened me too much to see what was happening with him. Something drastic happened, I was deeply sad, confused and bewildered, but at the same time, it couldn't have continued that way. Now, in all the polls that I was reading - in countdown magazine... - Mm. Oh, yeah. You know, when it came to sexiest man... - Mm? - ..You won. - Is there a category for that? - Yeah. She used to have a picture of Michael on the fridge, long before they got together, and I think it said 'love dog' on it. You were saying earlier on that in Australia the music is more important than the image, and in england everyone's very concerned about your trousers. - Mm. - I'm not surprised. The trousers. They look a little tight to me. Now, how would you describe the music? Belinda: I think Bob wrote 'fucker' above it once, and so she got a new picture. Bob and Paula were probably the most famous showbiz couple in britain. I've gotta go off and do stuff. Give the kids my love. - I will. Lots of love. Bye. - Bye! Belinda: Paula just fell out of love with him. And then, one day, Michael was there. This is a guest that has everything that a rock star needs to have. Danger, talent, curly hair, and Australian subtlety. Short of them being naked on the show, it couldn't have been more obvious. The two of them had enormous sexual chemistry. Hi. Paula: Hi. - what are you, a big sex symbol of something? "Hi." Belinda: She was fabulous. She was a cross between Marilyn Monroe and Mary poppins. - Album out at the moment. - Yes, I do. And, crikey, I really want to talk to you about that. Mm. I bet you do. He called me up and he said, "Martha, I don't care what you're hearing or reading, "this is the greatest thing for me." He sounded like a different person. He said he loved having a family. Which is one of the things that Michael fell madly in love with her about, her kids and the way she was with them. And the sense of security he got from her, that she would look after them all. I don't think it had occurred to Michael that this was gonna happen. He was witnessing the breakup of a family that he was responsible for, which had a deep impact on him because of his own upbringing. I don't think he could ever forgive himself for what he had done, and he took it out on Bob geldof, but it was really a reflection of anger and shame. Man: How's life been? Have you had a bad couple of years? Have you enjoyed it? Had a nightmare? What's been going on? Yeah, part nightmare, part fantastic. Man: Ok. - A bit of both, really. - Do you ignore it all? - I try. Water off a duck's back? I've always ignored it all, as much as I can, but after a while it just kinda gets in your face. Because Bob was sir Bob, Paula was then cast off into social Siberia. And she felt that hard, because she'd always been so loved and adored by the public. Your current Beau sort of beats people up. He sometimes gets a bit cross. Man: Only if the photographers come in and they're from the wrong organisation... Don't say another word! It seems to have upset the pseudo-moralities of the editors of the tabloids. It's more the kids that I worry about. I love them, they love me. I'm not their dad. I'm their s-dad, as they call me. Or Michael. "Martha, she's beautiful. "Martha, she's beautiful. "Martha, I've never loved somebody like that." It was magical! It just was something that changed him completely. Man: How is it being a dad for the first time? Uh... it's um... It's beaut... I mean, it's fantastic. I'm on cloud nine. What can I say? She's amazing. She's never cried. She sleeps with us. We wake her up in the morning, she just hangs out. We call her tiger. Tiger Lily's one of her names. Michael: Hello! Hi, gorgeous! Aw! Hil hi! Martha: He loved, loved, loved her. She was his world. He'd carry around a clock with her face on it. She moved her fingers, she moved her toe, and you couldn't get him to stop talking about it. It was a wonderful thing. And he would sing to her and make her dance. Her name's heavenly hiraani tiger Lily hutchence. - Wow! A lot of hs in there. - Yeah, h-h-h. She's her own 4-h club, almost. Almost, yeah. He would light up unlike anything I'd ever seen. To watch him like that was so wonderful, because there were days that he was not happy. Rosie: Now, when you go on tour, will she come with you? No, she just left yesterday, actually, back to London, with her mum, Paula. You know, she comes out for a week here, a week there. - Can't do it too long. - No. Is she sleeping through the night yet? She's great. Honestly. It's my first baby and she's just perfect. I mean, I can't believe it. Everybody's like... The band's like, "you wait till you have kids," and then I'm like... "Great. Typical Michael." She sleeps all night, she just laughs in the day and giggles and smiles, never cries. Michael: You know, some people say you make your luck. I kinda believe there's a sort of cosmic... I-I mean, I believe in god, and I... And I... You know, your stars line up and sometimes everything in life clicks, sometimes you're fighting against nature itself, you know? And the winner is, for the best video... 0asis, wonderwall. Man: What happened with oasis at the brit awards? What was that? I don't know. He says crap all the time like that to everyone. The funny thing is, Liam was saying to me, "hey, mate, you know, I really love you, I really love you." Martha: That crushed Michael. It was devastating, that moment in his life." - So, new album. - Yeah. Looks good. Woman: Full moon, dirty hearts was '93, so what took you so long? Martha: They were massive worldwide, and to go completely the other way, that was really hard on them. And really hard on Michael. They were hoping elegantly wasted would be the album that would turn things around. Michael: Fuck you, fuck off. Paula, look up, please. They ransacked her house while she was away. The nanny let this awful woman in, and then they searched the house. First call was very irrational, "they're gonna arrest me, "they're gonna try to take tiger. "Paula has to go back." It scared him like nothing has ever scared him. Reporter: Leaving the high court in London tonight, an unsmiling Bob geldof, reportedly seeking an emergency order about the future of his three children. Well, I've just come back to fight for custody of my children. I've had to leave tiger behind in Australia with her dad and her grandparents, which, obviously, I didn't want to. As for the so-called investigative reporting in the mirror, suffice to say there's an entirely different way of looking at this whole series of events. Ok, thanks very much, gentlemen. Martha: If it was proven true, tiger could be taken away from them, and that, to him, would be the most devastating thing that could ever happen to him. They were in the press every single day. Paula was in court all the time. Belinda: They were literally hounded by the press. Nothing they could have done would have been ok. Michael: I'm basically pretty shy, so I find the whole thing nightmarish. You become dehumanised. There's a bullying mentality in england, and a very misogynistic one, and that's scary. Belinda: The opium found in the house bollocks, that was really the beginning of the end, I think. And then they just spiralled into taking more drugs, which she'd never done. She was famously teetotal. Prozac and valium and heroin. They were a very bad influence on each other. There were months that Michael would be totally clean, but when he was feeling the pressures of the Paula situation and everything else, it just weighed on him and he wanted to escape. "Oh, let's try heroin." Not needle heroin, but still, that had a horrible effect on him. He was depressed. I arranged for him to go to a doctor. He got Prozac. I think he was taking more than he was meant to. I think he felt quite isolated here. Martha: He felt he had no real friends, very few people he could count on and trust. I just know he felt very lonely. For me, I-i-i would say don't live in London. At all. You just get shanghaied by these guys and exploited, and they make it up as they go along. I've always sort of prided myself... Try to be sort of naive about stuff and just get on with your own life. Thought about leaving and going back to Australia? Yeah, but uh... Yeah, I'd love to. E-eventually. But, you know, I don't think you should live your life being pushed around by people, either, you know, so we'll see. Ok. Well, it's been a real honour meeting you, Michael. Michael: Good questions. He wanted to be in england because of Paula and the kids. On the other hand, it's the last place that he wanted to be because of the situation between the press and Paula and him and the baby and Bob. Hello! When Paula was around, it changed the dynamic a lot. She knew how to push his buttons, as often people in relationships do. And she just seemed to hit that button a lot. He just was an emotional wreck. Al-right-y. Lesley: There was a lot of stuff that was kinda heart-breaking, because he just wanted to please her. But unless it was all about her, there was a lot of drama, big time. I'd like an ice-cream. Would you guys buy me an ice-cream? Man: Oh, I think you've missed it. No, he's right there! Lesley: I know he loved her. I mean, he was madly in love with her. And I know he wasn't happy at that time, but I know he still loved her. How are you? How are you doing? Martha: When Michael didn't know what to do, time to change, because that'll make it better. Benson! J inxs: Searching j I am searching ji am not alone j I am searching j please show me some j this was written by a 20-year-old. "August 31, 1997. "I got a call from him and he was upset. "Apparently Paula's been trying to break up with him all day. "She's clinically depressed "and comes from a horrible background." "The next day, Michael stopped by, "and when I opened the door, before I could say hi, "we were in the most romantic embrace of my life." "September 12th, 1997. "Michael phones me "and says Paula's tried to commit suicide. "I asked how he was, he said, 't'm weird in the head.' "I said, 'i bet.' "he said, 'no, you have no idea. "You don't know what I'm going through. "You don't understand what's going on in my head." J if we could face the pain j and I could do the same j it would be clear tomorrow j but would it start j but would it start again? J oh, yeah j Erin: The phone would ring and it was her, and I would find another part of the room. You could hear the discord. The emotional rollercoaster was so high and so low, and I was a retreat from all of that, all of the bad, all of the sadness. J please j show me some j saw a mother screaming j she had lost control j of what she once believed in j he was leaving the next day. He crawled up to me on the bed. He said, "you worry every time I leave." I said, "yeah." He said, "you think something's gonna happen to me," and I said, "yeah." And he goes, "do you think I'm gonna kill myself?" And I just said, "yeah." And he kind of came up and... Just said, "aw, baby, that's not gonna happen. J oh j if you could face the pain 7' you know, I mean, life is... You know, kind of a mess, isn't it? Let's face it. Almost every area of his life was affected one way or another in some kind of turmoil. That tour in Australia, as it was counting down, he had a lot of anxiety about going there. He really didn't wanna go. I was concerned about him. I said, "I'll call the promoters and let's cancel it." And he just couldn't do it, because no matter the ups and downs the band had, he loved them. And Michael had this feeling about Australia, it meant a great deal to him. He rang me. He said that life was complicated. We arranged to meet up the next day for a late breakfast. Man: Any surprises in store? Oh... When isn't there ever? Those rehearsals were the best I'd seen Michael in a long time. He'd ridden his Harley-Davidson into the studio, came out of the elevator doors on his Harley. Hey! Just 'cause I'm in a good... Just 'cause I'm in a good mood now, there's no need to fuck around. I just said, "it's been postponed. "I can't come until after December 17th." He said, "I'm gonna ring Bob and I'm going to beg him." Paula spoke to Michael on the phone. She was hysterical. I spoke to Michael. He said to me, "just make sure she's ok, will you?" I think he was exasperated with the whole thing. Michele: He called early. He was upset and he was angry. "Why aren't you there?" I didn't hear it till later. Martha: He called me. He was extremely upset and confused that the kids weren't coming to Australia. But it was more than that. He was really confused about where he wanted to be himself in life. I went back to the office and I heard a message. He was just really angry. He said, "Martha, I don't give a shit anymore." When I got home, I heard a different voice, "marth, marth, I need you." So desperate. Michele: He called again. He said he needed to see me. He said, "everything's fucked up." He'd start crying. He said, "I'm supposed to be at rehearsals." I suggested that he try and go to sleep and ring the guys and tell them that he couldn't make it. And he said, "yeah, I will do that." And he said, "but will you come, anyway?" He just sounded so exhausted and totally depleted in the most extreme way. I got there about 20 minutes later. I went up to the room and there was no answer. I went down and wrote a note, and I just went home, thinking he'd fallen asleep. The phone rang and this reporter said, "can you make a comment about Michael?" And I said, "about what? The tour?" He said, "no, about Michael." And I said, "would you please explain yourself?" And he said, "oh, I'm sorry, I'll ring the PR people," and hung up. And I just sat there, frozen. Martha: And all at once, the studio called me on one line and the tour manager called me on the other lines. Man: Ok, Michael, take care. Michael: Right. Man: Bye-bye. Michael. Say hello to everybody. What's that, sorry? Michael. Say hello to everybody. Man: I will do. Ok, mate, bye-bye. Well, I've got the first part of it anyway. I've... J all... J all j all veils and misty j streets of blue j almond looks j that chill divine j some silken moment j goes on forever j and we're leaving broken hearts behind j - what happens here? Chorus? - The chorus. J; Mystify j new one, yeah. J you mystify me j - what happens? Repeat it? - One more. J mystify j you mystify me j j I need perfection js some twisted selection j that tangles me j to keep me alive j in all that exists j but none has your beauty j oh, I see your face j and I will survive j mystify j you mystify me j yeah j mystify j you mystify me j eternally wild with the power j to make every moment come alive j all those stars that shine above you will kiss you every night j all veils j and misty streets of blue j almond looks j that chill divine j some silky moment j goes on forever j and we're leaving j yeah, we're leaving broken hearts behind j mystify j you mystify me j yeah j mystify j; Mystify me j eternally wild with the power j to make every moment come alive j all those stars shine above you j; Well, they kiss you every night j mystify j you mystify me j mm j mystify j; Mystify me j sing it crowd: J mystify j; Mystify me j; Mystify j Michael: J I wanna be loved by you j nobody else but you j I wanna be loved by you j be-doo, be-doo, ba-ba-be-doo. J j Max q: Concrete J I'm sitting in a bar j staring at the universe that's in my drink j the motion of my straw j is stirring anti-clockwise in the glass j I recall the moments well j and I raise my glass to you j you held me in your arms j and saved me from despair j as I'm older and more stupid j the years have etched stupidity into my skull j I condemn my foolishness j and I raise my glass to you j yeah, the world is packed with murderers and madmen j they promise us a slow, slow death j those who torture with a smile j I don't like their idea of business at all... & Captions produced by access media pty ltd |
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