1
- Howdy fellas!
Them's pretty lights, what'cha
doing, making a movie?
- Shit...
Good boy.
- Good morning
Canyonland it's 9:05,
you're listening to
KCNY, your buddy Billy.
Take a look-see at weather
today, mostly cloudy today
with gusty winds so
watch out for your hats
and I'll be right here
I'm not going anywhere.
Playing more country classics from the
country classic coral, on KCNY.
I But it's too hard to hide I
I Seize me J"
I What I wouldn't give to have you I
I Please me J"
- Why'd you do that?
I'd rather not have
the urban cowboy stuff
this early, I'm allergic.
- When in Rome dear do as the Romans do.
- When in Rome dear, I go shopping.
- Thank god for the wilderness.
Thank you.
- How is it?
' SOQQY-
I hate microwave croissants.
- Well, it's the price you
pay for roughing it dear.
I Forget the yesterdays I
- Looks like somebody just
checked out of the Hilton.
- Oh, maybe he's
looking for a safety valve too.
You guys might have a lot to talk about.
- No, he could be trouble.
- Oh come on now, where's your
sense of adventure I've been
hearing about so much lately?
' So?
Croissant?
I didn't catch your name?
- Reilly.
- First or last?
- Both.
- Well I'm Ken Griffiths,
this is my wife Cheri.
I'm an attorney, you know
the pressure sometimes,
you just, you gotta unwind,
hunting's my release.
You headed anywhere in particular?
- Nope, just cross country as
long as the ride holds out.
- The only way to go, it
takes one of these babies.
And good company.
- Seems to me you got both.
- Yeah, but not the time.
One week, seven short days
of freedom I tell 'ya.
- Big case?
- Court would be a
big adventure for Ken.
See he's a show-business
attorney, rock and roll.
He draws up contracts
with assholes and then
he sues them when they don't
meet their end of the bargain.
Right dear?
Sometimes when he's
out hunting he pretends
like the deer are his clients.
It's wish fulfillment you know,
it makes him very vicious.
- I can see that.
- Uh oh.
- What is it?
- It my dear is the unmistakable aroma
of ham and eggs breakfast.
No more soggy croissants for this boy.
- Morning!
Can I get you all anything to start with,
coffee or something?
- You know I'd like a--
- Just water.
- Water, fine, coming right up.
- No I'd like a, I'd like a beer.
- You got it!
- Make that two.
- You got it!
- Morning.
Well howdy darling.
- Morning Charley!
Sit anywhere you like, I'll
be with you in a second!
- Ah take your
time darling, no hurry.
- There you go.
- Well it's not exactly
continental cuisine.
- Honey this is real meat
and potatoes country.
I wouldn't.
You don't know where that's been.
- What am I supposed to do huh?
Order Pierre, get real!
- Fine it's your body.
- Yeah, and I know
what's good for it.
- Anything else for you today Charley?
- Steak must have been a little tough.
- Oh no Charley!
- What the fuck is the matter with you?
Hey I'm talking to you, what
the fuck is the matter with--
- Enough!
Excuse me, excuse me.
Oh, shit!
- Benny!
Benny this is Lori!
Benny, gimme the sheriff quick!
- Get him Reilly!
- Charley, that's enough!
- First name
Robert, last name Durell,
an employee of...
- Let him go!
Charley, come on.
Charley.
Don't do it it's me, come on!
Charley!
Yeah I copy, did you tell the sheriff?
Dispatch can you copy?
Can you hear me?
Damn.
- Now what?
- We wait.
The sheriff will have a
few questions for you.
I'll relieve you of that piece.
- That's the kind of thanks I get
for doing your dirty work?
- Thanks.
The piece?
- A gun.
For Christ sakes he had a gun!
- So what counselor, 50
million Americans do.
- Oh you thought it'd be an adventure
to pick up a god damned hitchhiker!
Perfect!
- We can use
statements from you two.
- Really, well officer you
forget it, do you understand?
Now I believe in doing my
bit just like anybody else,
but right now I'm getting
the hell out of here!
Get in the RV now!
- Now wait a minute!
- You don't like it
you shoot me, shoot me!
Can't believe it, we pick up a lunatic!
- Now wait a minute,
don't you think you're
over reacting just a little bit?
I mean maybe he's a
policeman or something?
- Oh right right right,
he's a fed, no, he's a CIA!
I got it he's Dirty Harry, eh?
- Well he saved your life!
' Ah Please, get in!
Hey pal, I'll see you
on the front page, huh?
- Hey, hey, hey you got my bag!
- Did anybody ever hear
that this is supposed
to be a quiet town?
What the hell is going on?
- I don't know, my radio's dead!
- Mine too.
- He just went nuts,
stabbed Lori in the hand
and tried to shoot me.
' And?
- He shot old Charley in the leg.
I asked him to stick around
in case you had any questions.
- You bet I do.
- I'll waive my rights if you have a look
at old Charley's leg.
- Damn!
- What the hell are you doing,
training for the Indy 500?
- Well the fucking engine died!
God damn battery, Jesus!
- Well I guess that solves
the croissant problem.
- Come on we gotta go back there.
Blow this pop stand, let's go.
- My hero.
- Now are you walking, or are you waiting?
- I'll wait.
- Great, I'll walk.
- Wait, I'll come with you!
- Shut the door, Jesus!
' Shut up!
- Yeah I read about that.
They kicked you off
the force, didn't they?
- Should'a give me a fucking medal.
- That's the difference son.
Out here killing a rapist
is a duty, not a crime.
- She was only 12 years old god dammit.
Commissioner had this
thing about bad press.
- Why you hitch hiking?
- Unemployment sort of
limited my travel options.
- Relatives?
- Enemies.
One of the assholes got away.
- They always do son.
God damn it Charley I
don't want to hurt you!
- Do you mind?
I'm trying to catch my breath!
- Hey!
how you doing?
- Good how you doing?
That your Starfire back there?
- Yeah we broke down.
- Where you headed?
- Well to tell you the truth,
we're looking for a car rental, or a...
- None of those around here.
- All right, what about,
can you give us a lift
to the police station,
- Sure, sure.
- the sheriff, yeah?
- Climb in back.
- All right,
thanks a lot!
- We'll get you there.
- Come on!
Not one word, get in.
Get!
- Poor city folks.
- For heaven's sakes Sheriff,
I was only gonna be a minute!
You son of a bitch
cocksucker what the hell you
think you're doing, I
just had this car painted!
- Yeah,!
Yeah, bitch!
- What the hell is going on?
- Your Pa's gone crazy, he's
taking on the whole damn town!
- The bank foreclosed on
him just last week Roy.
- Yeah I know.
- Want me to talk to him?
- Just get his gun, Larry!
He's already killed somebody.
Go.
' Pa?
Pa it's me.
Pa, Ma's been worried sick about you,
she's home waiting for you.
That's right Pa.
Come on, let's go home.
Come on.
Come on give me the gun.
- Mother of God!
Charley!
I always wondered what would
make a man snap like that.
- Well I gotta tell 'ya sheriff
you got one weird town here.
- About the only excitement
we ever used to have
is a couple of Friday night DUIs.
Until Leroy's truck this morning.
- What about it?
- Somebody shot it full of holes and
pushed it in the river.
We found Leroy inside, he
was getting kind of ripe,
he must have been in
there a couple of clays.
- You didn't find anything
strange about that?
- Of course I did.
People in this town don't go around
using each other for target practice,
without some kind of reason at least.
They didn't used to.
- Problem is, now you
got four dead bodies.
- Yeah well that's his problem.
Look I don't want any part
of this, you understand?
And I want to go on record right now!
- Don't get excited Mr. Griffith,
nobody is asking you to volunteer.
. Yeah, I don't suppose you
have anything that resembles
a rental car service here would you?
- You have to see Floyd.
' Floyd?
- That's right, Floyd.
- Well forgive my ignorance
on rural celebrities Sheriff,
but just who in the hell is Floyd?
- He's the owner of the local
junk yard, he's a mechanic.
He might be able to get you something.
- I don't suppose he'd take
American Express would he?
Right.
- You might want to go with him.
- No, I handle Twisted Sister,
I think I can handle Floyd.
Hello?
Hello?
Is there anyone here?
- You know that green stuff
Charley had instead of blood?
- Yeah?
- Well I had it checked
at the hospital, Jeff said that
it was some kind of an acid.
- Acid?
- Yeah.
So I sent an intern to
the State Pathology Lab,
his battery died in his
car just outside of town,
same as that lawyer's.
Wouldn't start again.
- You're really enjoying this aren't you?
- Yeah, I really thrive on it.
- Oh.
Vietnam right?
Bet you're a cop too.
- You know what I think?
- What?
- I think you're over clue
for a good fuck.
- We better go check on your friend.
Julia stay with her, make
sure you got plenty of ammo.
- I will.
Dad?
- Yeah?
- Be careful.
This thing doesn't make any sense.
- Don't worry, your old
man will be just fine.
Hello?
' Floyd?
You here?
Floyd?
- Hello?
Floyd?
Floyd is that you?
- I see you found Floyd.
- Get him off of me!
- Shit not again!
- Fuck you!
No charge for the parts and labor Floyd.
- Miss Griffiths?
Are you all right?
Are you okay?
- You're fine!
' Stop it!
Stop it'.!
Stop it'.!
- What the hell?
I was right,
this whole town's gone psycho!
- There is definitely something wrong!
Listen, you two go back to the office.
I want to check a few things,
see if I can get some help.
- Cheri!
Settle down!
It's me, it's all right!
Reilly, Reilly!
No, no!
- Open the door!
- No!
- Open the door!
Get her in!
Julia shut the door!
- Now god dammit Sheriff,
I want some answers
and I want 'em right now!
- We'd all like to know some answers,
if we knew the answers--
- Now don't you dare
lecture me!
In case you hadn't noticed I got a wife
in there that's half nuts!
Now something in this fucking place
sent her over the deep end!
Now you take my word for it Sheriff,
I am gonna sue this stop
in the road for every
penny it hasn't got and that
includes you, you understand?
God dammit where is the doctor?
- Bad doin's around here Roy!
- Oh tell me about it!
- You know Johnny Haggers' boy?
The one that looks like Howdy Doody?
- Yeah?
- Tried to strangle a nurse
with a telephone cord
just a little while back.
Then old lady Williams plumb
attacks me out of the blue!
- Well we got another case here, his wife,
we had to lock her up!
- Oh, well, three CCs
of this stuff ought to
calm her down some, made our people
a sight more manageable.
- But wait a second,
exactly what is this stuff?
- Nothing but 100 proof
grade A tranquilizer, mister.
Nothing fancy, just got
a hell of a kick to it.
- Jesus, come on.
Be careful now.
No!
- Just doesn't make any sense.
Folks I've known all my life feuding
with each other for no reason.
Hospital filled with people
bleeding green blood?
Telephones and the radios don't work.
And the damn cars breaking
down at the city limits!
- Think something's behind it?
- I don't know what, but it
all started at the same time.
- It might be something in the air.
- Or the water.
- The water.
Contaminate the water supply and cut off
all communications so nobody
will know till it's over.
- Yeah but why?
- You're bleeding!
- At least it's red.
- We've got to act fast.
' Act?
What are you talking about?
- Don't tell anybody I told you but
we got an emergency situation here.
You in this time or you
gonna rent a car as usual?
- Hey don't give me that shit pal,
not after what I've been through!
- Knock it off.
Doc, we think there's
something wrong with the water.
I want you to prepare as
many of those pig-stickers
as you can, it's all we got for now.
- Will do.
- Check with your people at the hospital,
find out how many of 'em
drank the water this morning,
and then do whatever you can.
Any of you drink any of the water?
- Just an orange juice.
- We had beer.
You?
- I haven't touched water in years.
- Coffee, anything?
- What about it Sheriff, we
don't want you flipping out
and shooting us in the back do we?
- Uh, no, no no I didn't have any coffee.
It's starting.
- Sheriff?
You're not serious no--
- You're gonna need this
for your piece.
You're gonna need this too.
- Look you guys have been
watching too many Westerns,
this is not high noon!
- I reckon it is.
Listen, these are decent
god-fearing people,
these are not killers.
Don't shoot 'em unless
you have to and by god if
you gotta shoot 'em don't
shoot 'em to kill 'em,
just wound 'em, anything
to keep 'em out of action
until we figure out what the
hell is going on, understood?
Julia get on the PA
system and tell everybody
not to drink the water!
Make it good and loud, make
sure everybody gets the message!
You two go around to the south,
I'll go around to the north.
Now nobody gets hurt!
- Tell them that!
- Attention all citizens,
our water supply has been contaminated
with a toxic, possibly lethal substance.
- What the hell happened to this town?
- The freeway missed it.
- No I mean all the loony toons.
- Boredom.
- Jesus Reilly will
you give it a rest huh?
- Sounds to me like
you're scared shitless.
- Yeah...
- So am I.
- Well, you're human after all are 'ya?
- The only difference with me,
only the last couple hours,
with you, last a whole lifetime.
- I'll be there.
- He said not to shoot to kill!
- Great, next time I ask
permission, all right Reilly?
- Attention all citizens!
Our water supply has been contaminated,
with a toxic, possibly lethal substance.
All persons are advised to immediately--
- Freeze, police!
It's all right...
It's all right.
It's okay.
Stop right there!
Sorry...
I'm sorry...
- Reilly, that you?
- Yeah hold your fire!
- It looks like the OK
fucking corral out there!
- Yeah except that I ain't Wyatt Earp!
And you sure as hell ain't Doc Holliday!
- I resent that Sheriff!
All right Alex, I'll take
famous fatalities for 400.
- Long distance every 5 minutes,
follow it up with a phone call.
Now if you get an outside
line, get in touch
with the nearest army base.
Just be calm, tell 'em
exactly what I told you.
They'll send somebody to help.
- Will do.
- Oh, keep yourself locked in here.
- Qkay.
- How you holdin' Suz?
- All right I guess!
- Now you remember everything?
Keep 'em strapped down
tight, plenty of padding,
don't be stingy with that tranquilizer.
- I'll, will do Sheriff!
Good luck!
- All right good luck
to you honey.
That's the last of 'em.
Now barricade yourself
inside with the others.
If anybody shows up that you
don't know, let 'em have it.
Go ahead.
- Must be some kind of a weird experiment.
One guy probably controlling a whole town
with toxic chemicals.
Warfare like that you don't need nukes.
Just a few men and a few major
population centers to activate it.
Jesus Christ a perfect plan.
- How do you cut off a town
from the rest of the world?
It's the United States of
America for Christ sakes.
- Well hell son we're
just a spot on the map.
We don't even get many visitors,
just us, coming and going.
- Reason enough to pick Canyonland.
- But why haven't we seen 'em?
- We will, they'll need to
check the results first hand,
we'll be waiting on 'em.
- We will indeed.
- Sorry...
God...
I love you...
So much.
- Some things man just can't do.
- She's my wife!
- Oh, maybe the effects wear off,
could be all right after all.
Come on.
- Damn!
- NOW?
' No!
We don't know how many are in the van,
and those suits may be bullet proof.
- Well there's only one way to find out.
- No no no no, there's
too much space out here,
we gotta, we gotta pen 'em
in, at the old drive-in.
- Some Sheriff's never change.
- I'll get the cattle started,
you just make sure you're
there at the end of the drive.
- Hold on, his show now, you lead the way.
- Julia see if you can find a switch,
we get some light on those bastards.
You two, when the lights
come on, don't miss!
- Hey hey!
I tell 'ya he's gone nuts!
- Sue him.
' No!
- I'm sorry.
He was a good man.
- He was a good father too.
Why don't you keep it Reilly.
- Whatever you say Sheriff.
- I'm not much of a cop,
I just wanted to be close to my dad.
- What about Canyonland?
- This town doesn't
need a Sheriff anymore,
needs a god damned undertaker.
Listen, uh...
Uh...
- Now you're the law and
order in these parts Reilly.
- What does that make you?
- Just an ordinary citizen,
one who doesn't have to worry about
the legalities of justice.
- Thanks.
I think you just joined the posse.
The way I see it, we can
still track 'em down.
- Private little war?
- I don't need any help.
You can always go back.
- Look man I'm not a
total asshole, you know?
- No?
- No for a rock and roll
attorney I think I'm doing pretty good.
- You guys want to fight,
save it for the enemy.
- Well give us a hint, huh?
- You're the lawyer, you figure it out.
- Well by process of
elimination I have to say
it could be anybody from the CIA,
testing some new toxic agent,
or the KGB or anybody else using
Canyonland as a Guinea pig.
- The CIA would not be doing
this in their own back yard.
They've got Central America for that.
- The way I see it some
foreign assholes were
sent here on a mission,
they watch, they count,
and they destroy the evidence,
if they get out, they win.
I think it's time somebody
taught these fuckers a lesson.
- Whoa!
Whoa, whoa...
Whoa, whoa...
Whoa!
Whoa!
Hi ho Silver, come on!
Huh!
Hey Reilly, my ass is killing me.
- You take the side, you take the back
I'll take the front.
- All right.
- Don't panic and
start shooting till you get my signal.
- All right.
- Let's go.
NQVV!
Pretty impressive setup.
- Great air conditioning.
- American technology.
- Looks like they thought of everything.
- Yeah, even their getaway.
- What do you mean?
- They left everything here.
Must be some kind of airlift.
- Well why would they leave all this stuff
behind when they know
somebody's gonna find...
Oh shit!
- Let's go!
Come on.
Come on!
Hello!
- Which way now Kimosabe?
- Don't know, horses don't
leave tracks on these rocks.
- Yeah I got a good idea--
- Just drop her, down!
Cover me!
- A Man's got to do
what a man's got to do!
Reilly!
I'm hit!
Ow...
- Whoa!
How bad is it?
- Don't know, you could die maybe.
- Ah, that's such a, I
knew it, damn I knew it!
- In about 50 to 60 years.
- Fuck you!
Fine.
- You'll have to stay with him
he's lost a lot of blood.
- I didn't come all this way to play
nursemaid to a tenderfoot.
- Force yourself.
- No, I'm coming with you.
- How do you know I'm
just not gonna ride off
in the wrong direction,
maybe by accident, maybe not?
- Because guys like you
don't give up Reilly.
- This isn't a woman's
fight, if you want revenge,
let me do it for you.
- Why?
- Call it a death wish.
You're a hell of a
guy Reilly.
- Don't bet on it.
- I do.
My life in fact.
- Christ sakes spare me!
Oh, damn...
- Better get the counselor
there in some shade
if he don't bleed to
death he'll probably fry.
- Good luck.
- Whoa, whoa...
One at a time huh?
Got a problem?
- US Army patrol
helicopter , over.
- Sheriff Hanks asked me to say hello.
Enough to drive a whole town crazy.
Imagine what it can do to one man.
You get any time off in
Hell, come see us again.
- Goodbye fucker.
- Hitching again?
- Heh, women cops scare
the hell out of me.
- I'm not one anymore, remember?
- Just kidding.
- I was hoping you'd stay.
- I'm not the kind to stay
very long in one place.
- Guess some things never change, huh?
- Some.
Not others.
- Give it up Reilly.
Vigilantes die or go to jail.
Vendettas are old-fashioned.
- So am I.
- Oh for Christ sakes what
is this, Days of Our Lives?
So you want a ride or what?
- I thought you were going the other way?
- Well, I guess you
thought wrong smart ass.
What's it gonna be?