1
"Norway descends upon the Mediterranean"
Horis Perideraio, 1984
Hey man, is this Athens?
Are we there yet?
The train has arrived
at Athens Central Station,
and will be departing shortly.
Passengers are kindly
requested to disembark.
The winter of '84 was pure hell.
Night after night you'd
walk in the rain,
praying that the music
would never end...
and the only thing you really needed,
would be a warm girl.
Star?
Hooker!
Don't let me cramp your style...
Is this Cine Star at Omonia Square?
What are you, psychic
or something?
Jimmy, you old bastard...
nice one!
Jimmy, you grave digging bastard!
A cozy little nest... and in the penthouse too!
- Did you shave?
- You bet I did.
You have reached the funeral
home of Dimitris Dimitriou.
Please leave your message
after the tone.
Where the hell are you, Jimmy boy?
Where are you, man?
You pulling a no-show on me?
You're nowhere
to be found, man...
I'm here! Came in last night,
on the locomotive.
I'm now at...
...Disco Zardoz.
Don't stand me up, buddy!
Miss you, man!
Later!
May...hem!
Give it to me straight
and solitary...
What?
What's up?
What time does this place
get hopping?
It doesn't, really.
It doesn't, huh?
What do you know
about it, dearie?
You're just a boy.
Let granny show you
how it's done.
What'cha want, sweetheart?
Get me another.
Theresa is pretty bombed, huh?
Yeah, same goes for your joint!
Hey, I'm not the captain here.
I'm just the cabin boy.
Where's Jimmy at, man?
Jimmy who?
Jimmy, the man,
The Shovel, the Pale Face...
- You mean the gravedigger?
- Right, the gravedigger.
I haven't seen him
for over a month.
You seem cornered.
The boss...
On the house.
So where are you from, pal?
Just cause you bought me a drink
don't mean you get my CV.
What's wrong with getting to know
your customers better?
Need a hand?
Beat it!
Will you pick up my gear?
Can't tell if
the dope is bad...
or I just can't get high
anymore.
Are you one of us?
So it seems.
You bite?
I haven't sucked blood
in over ten years.
I got hooked on dope.
It's all about willpower, man.
Godam hell dust!
Need anything else,
or are you good to go?
Huh?
I see grief inside you.
Whoa,
Hold on just one second...
What are you...
a gypsy fortuneteller now?
These eyes have seen a lot.
Why don't you keep it
to yourself then?
Be careful, man...
You're not gonna give me
the time of day, will you?
This is classic Casablanca.
Moving on..
Hit me!
"Hold on to the Night"
"Hold on tight"
"Hold on to the Night"
"I'll fall into your arms"
"Cover your empty heart
like a blanket"
"Hold on to the Night, tight"
ls the party over?
The party hasn't even started.
You passed out
on the dance floor.
Who are you, again?
I'm the captain.
The boss, so to speak.
That's me.
Marko is the name.
The cops raided the place
and we had to drag you up here.
We wouldn't wanna
get busted.
Want some tea?
Tea?
Are you trying to poison me?
Got any gin?
Sure I do.
Are you an actor?
I used to be...
I'm a business man now.
You're pretty good...
You know what I liked
about the movies?
No, I don't.
The characters I played
will never die,
I'm kind of immortal
in a way.
You got a phone?
Fucking spoilsport!
Sorry.
You look pale.
Do you want some soup?
I've already eaten.
Take a seat.
I'm feeling lonely tonight.
The party never ends.
I'll get you some soup.
Nice and hot.
It has garlic in it.
You don't mind garlic,
do you?
No, not really... I eat
everything.
That's why you're all sturdy,
and I'm just an old fart.
About that phone...
Next to the cloakroom.
Feed it some change, will you?
You have reached the funeral
home of Dimitris Dimitriou.
Please leave your message
after the tone.
Jim... Jimmy boy.
Your answering machine is
really busting my balls, man!
Pretty soon we'll be exchanging recipes,
your answering machine and I.
I've been waiting all night, man!
Have a heart, buddy...
Look, I'm off now,
Be back in the morrow.
Or you can drop by Cine Star later.
For tea and biscuits.
We can read the Bible or
something...
Later...
What's up, little man?
Looking good!
Were you with Marko?
Is he watching
his films again?
Something like that...
I used to be an actor too,
you know!
No shit! Just like Valentino.
Can you spare some change
for a vermouth?
Hey lady...
you're some kind of lady!
I sure am.
Not a klutz, like you.
OK, that was unfortunate,
but before that...
You were a real angel!
You hardly touched the ground.
So, what makes you tick?
Me?
I love Horis Perideraio...
Aha!
Vangelis...
Aha...
The Synthetics...
Mmmmm
What are you looking for?
I'm looking for something, alright.
Aren't we all?
Don't you ever stop dancing?
If I stop, I'm dead meat.
You already seem
pretty dead to me!
I see. Can't blame me for trying...
I guess my little dance routine
was all for nothing.
What dance routine?
You know, the routine!
Brezhnev...? Nureyev...?
Brilliant!
Never seen you here before...
We should do this
more often, then!
- I have to go.
- What does this loser want now?
Where are you off to?
My name is Zano.
I'm Theresa.
We met earlier.
- I don't remember you.
- Really? How come?
Leave it to me...
you're just a boy.
Let granny show you
how it's done.
Oh my, what big teeth
you have!
Fuck it!
Zano...
Howdy, Zano?
What have you done?
I was going to fucking bite you,
but I changed my mind!
I have to go.
Where to?
I have work to do.
What kind of work?
Never mind him...
What about us?
Quick trip to Acapulco?
Or maybe Majorca?
Look, I've got
a job for you.
Are you up for it?
Do you ever stop dancing?
If I stop dancing...
If the rhythm stops...
my heart will stop beating.
Are you a poet or a vampire?
Look, do this one thing for my boss
and we'll... dance, alright.
Your boss... Who's your boss?
Since when do we have a boss?
Are you up for it or not?
Do you take me
for a sucker?
You do, don't you?
Alice!
That's it! Well done!
Enjoy it while it lasts!
I'm too old for that shit.
Mine are false. They rattle like a snake
every time I take 'em off.
Behave...
Well done!
- Did you hear what happened to Anita?
- No, what about her?
- Marko is going out of his mind...
- Who is this loser?
Anita was turning tricks
at Cine Star, the movie theater.
She was butchered...
How about a little spanking?
They found her in pieces.
You'll tell me all about it later.
Bring it round, will you?
So, how about a ride?
Hold on... that's it.
Cover up,
or you'll catch a cold.
Well done!
A ride to where?
Just a ride.
What about that fruitcake?
We'll take him with us.
Speak up, are you in?
Where did you get
those wheels, man?
Get in, silly! it's not mine,
I borrowed it.
Come on!
Athens!
What was that, honey?
Can you put on the radio?
Got any family in Athens?
No.
An aunt, an uncle...
What are you, a cop?
First it's the third degree, then
it's handcuffs and then off to jail?
Alice...
Alice...
Yes.
In wonderland.
This must be Peter Pan then!
So who am I?
The designated sucker?
You?
You're my boyfriend, Zano.
Tonight you are my boyfriend.
"You are my boyfriend, Zano.
Tonight you're my boyfriend".
Are we there?
No.
SQ?
There's something I need
to take care of.
Oh?
I won't be long.
Will you take care of junior, here?
We'll be just fine... won't we?
Ok!
I'll give you the royal treatment.
Put 'em up, champ!
Hands off, you old fart!
Something smells fishy.
You're chocking me,
motherfuckers!
I wasn't long, was I?
A real lady. Right on time.
Can you turn that
piece of junk down?
Why did you tie him up?
We were playing Hangman.
He was gonna fall and...
it's a long story...
Let's move on.
Were you throwing a barbecue in there?
It was all smoky and shit.
Yes, a barbecue.
Sort of.
Let's get burned!
"Electric Angel"
"The fever resides inside"
Electric Angel"
Is this really necessary?
You know the drill.
If the rhythm stops...
...your heart will stop
beating, we got it.
But turn it down, will you honey?
You'll wake up the werewolf.
So, what about Norway?
You guys barely survive up there, right?
A frozen kingdom!
Are you having a good
time, you crazy fuck?
Are we lost?
We're almost there!
So...
how about it?
How about what?
Well...
you know...
- What, here?
- Yes...
Somewhere around here,
I don't know...
Behind a tree or something...
I don't know.
I thought we'd save the best for last.
Get the job done first.
Is that all I am to you?
Just another job?
Come on...
Look who's talking now!
Fine, let's get it over with.
You better behave!
Come on...
Here's fine.
That's it...
You're not gonna
bite me, will you?
In the throes of passion
and all that?
...a warm girl.
Oh I'm warm alright.
But you're stone fucking cold!
You don't have a heart,
do you?
Did that bloody Norwegian pull
a disappearing act with my stereo?
No way, he must be
around here somewhere.
Peter!
That's the spirit.
We've got work to do.
Peter!
Peter!
Petros... Piotr... Mum and dad
are looking for you!
Zano...
Do you think something
happened to him?
Like what? He's a big boy,
I'm sure he's fine.
Seriously? He was
totally wasted and...
And?
And, he was... you know.
And?
Stop it, Zano!
Come on, let's go this way.
- There he is.
- Where?
Where's my stereo,
you little shit?
Are we there yet?
We're here.
What is this place?
You don't suppose little
miss sunshine over there...
...will throw us in a dungeon,
like Kolokotronis, do you?
Are you familiar with
Kolokotronis?
Let me ask you something.
This job we're supposed to do...
Do you even know what it is?
No.
No?
Not exactly...
I was only told to
bring you here.
Him, too?
Him too, yes.
OK...
Can you see anything?
Fuck-all.
Don't I know you
from somewhere?
Come on.
That's more like it.
"Dracula, Dracula, Dracula"
"Why did I have
to steal your kiss?"
"I rule over your life"
"Attract you like a magnet"
"I will rule over your thoughts"
"You can escape me no more"
"Dracula, Dracula, Dracula"
"We are yours by the thousands"
"Body and soul at your command"
"You may torment us"
"as long as you give us
the kiss of life"
"Dracula, Dracula, Dracula"
Hello, my friends!
I'm so glad you've come!
Let me introduce myself.
My name is Bram Stoker.
Bram Stoker?
The Norwegian is back!
Excuse me, what did he just say?
I don't speak the lingo...
- Who is he?
- Who, him?
He's Bram Stacker.
The author of Dracula.
Ever heard of Dracula?
He's just a sack of bones, man!
100 years old and counting!
He's on life support.
He's got one foot in the grave,
no joke!
That's why you're here...
He's the job?
Yes...
That's fucked up!
All you have to do
is bite him.
Give him eternal life.
Are you friggin' kidding me?
No fucking way.
He's gonna make it
worth your while.
I don't give a fuck.
Why are you so negative
all of a sudden?
I don't feel like biting him.
And you know what?
He's not who he says he is.
And even if he was,
I still wouldn't give a fuck!
Fine, so he's not
Bram Stoker.
A little white lie, to entice you.
Will you bite him?
Junior here can do it.
Who, Peter? Peter is not
fully transformed yet...
You conniving little bitch...
How do you know so much
about my kind?
Did you set me up?
Who the fuck are you?
Who are these people?
Who is this guy?
Mach das!
(Do it!)
Well, it just so happens
I speak German...
and this is fake...
What is this? No way man!
No way!
Adolf Hitler?
Hey, Norway...
What did the old fart
do to you?
This is where I stop dancing.
The fucking music
has stopped, too.
"Norway is too far away
"We better go to Athens"
"Norway, is too far away"
"We're better off in Athens"
I guess you took me up
on that dungeon, huh?
Looks that way...
Just like Kolokotronis!
You guys have it all sorted out,
don't you?
What did you expect?
I was asking for it...
I guess...
So what about us?
What about us?
We could have had something...
I could have been
your boyfriend...
We could have worked it out...
Look, Zano...
the others are getting
impatient out there.
If you don't do the job..
They will off you.
Get the job done, get your money
and get gone.
In time, they will
forget about you.
You tramp...
you dirty little bitch!
Get the job done...
get the money...
get gone...
and everything
will be fine.
G'dav to you!
You again, you pathetic
excuse for a man!
Watch your tongue!
I'll slash you right open...
You can fart
on my balls!
Why don't you turn the old man,
so we can all go home?
Do it yourself, you
slobbering idiot!
With my blood?
He'll go into toxic shock!
Do you have any idea
who he is?
He is a big deal...
and you're nothing
but a dipshit.
Oh, he's a pretty big
asshole, alright!
One to the left,
one to the right.
I will slash you right open...
Just like Jesus Christ...
it's a full house!
You didn't seem to mind when I wined you
and dined you back at my joint!
Do the job,
you dead man!
No...
Jimmy.
What the hell are you
wearing Jimmy boy?
Athens is a
tough place to be, man.
You grave digging scum...
What did I tell you, you moron?
Didn't I tell you to sit tight?
Now...
Now what, man?
Once a crow, always a crow.
I love you, man.
You set me up.
You set me up, alright.
I made you a designer coffin with
the Sistine Chapel on it.
I'll even throw in a
Cadillac hearse.
Get the job done
and go back home!
Go back to the ground man.
Everyone's waiting!
Who's everyone?
Everyone's waiting...
Three's a crowd, man!
You have reached the funeral
home of Dimitris Dimitriou.
Please leave your message
after the tone.
Jimmy...?
I hope you're ready.
Oh, I'm ready!
But get me away
from this relic,
he fucking reeks!
The people await.
The people...
What are you doing?
So how about it?
Feel like dancing now?
I don't believe you.
Bite him!
Bite him!
Bestow eternal life upon him.
How about I bestow my
balls on you, instead?
Bite him!
Bite him!
Bite him!
Bite him!
The winter of '84 was
pure hell.
Night after night,
you'd walk in the rain...
praying that the music
would never end.
If I stop dancing, you'd say...
"my heart will stop beating".
Since when do the damned,
wear shiny shoes?
Since when do they
dance under disco balls,
amidst colorful scoundrels...
under neon lights...
amidst the smoke and ruins.
Are you a fucking vampire...
or are you a poet?
The dead, you say,
don't dance.
Some of them, honey,
even dance under the ground.
"In Norwegian waters,
night after night,"
"people choose eternal life,"
"under the water,
in sub-zero temperature, "
"lazy leaps."
"Norway..."
"Norway..."
"Even if none of us were walking
against your snow white backdrop"
"Even if none of us were walking
against your snow white backdrop"
"Your white backdrop"
"Encrusted in ice..."
"Norway's deepest secrets..."
"melt slowly away...
it'll be a while"
"Cold hearts don't melt,
only the ice around them"
"Cold hearts don't melt,
only the ice around them"
"Norway descends upon the Mediterranean"
"Norway's coming"
"it's near"
"Norway is near you."