Andy?
It's Eli Wurman.
I know it's been a long time.
Did you get the invitation
I sent you?
I'm on this committee
for black/white dialogue
in New York...
that sort of thing?
Yeah. This very informal
civil rights committee.
We're having a benefit
tomorrow night at the Palm.
Trying to promote healing
in the current atmosphere.
Bring people together.
It's just very effervescent.
Good show.
Not like those big spectacles.
We really would.
I'd love for you to see it.
Great.
I'll put you down for two.
And bring your checkbook.
Projects I believe in.
Nick, hey, listen.
Yeah.
Trying to get back
to that old New York.
Oh, by the way,
I'm handling publicity
for this lovely little musical
called "Flypaper."
Show-biz people.
Good.
Not like those big spectacles.
It's old-fashioned Broadway.
I'd love you to see it.
But I try not to gauge anything
by how people react.
'Cause it's not the thing.
Well, we're not gonna know
anything for a while.
So the thing to do is to,
you know, just have a drink.
Wait it out.
That's what they do.
I think the show just got
so much better.
They did so much good work
that last week, Eli.
It's a fantastic show.
It's in God's hands now.
Just don't worry about it anymore.
Let time take care of it.
- Vicki.
- Hey, you.
We were gonna have a quiet supper.
I think it was 50-50 at best.
I don't think I can slip away
from this rat fuck, honey.
I'm waiting for the notices.
It's the party.
The hand-holding.
- All that blah-blah-blah.
- Okay.
Why don't you come by
my hotel tomorrow?
We'll have lunch, catch up.
How does that sound?
You always were
too good a date for me.
You go do whatever it is you do.
What do you do?
Oh, you don't want to know.
- Let me take you to the hotel.
- No.
I'll get you a cab.
See you tomorrow.
Bye.
Okay.
Where's Ross?
Who called?
And where's Cary?
Nobody good.
You think Cary Launer would
stick around for this shit?
He snuck out
when the blue swans came out.
They were cygnets.
Get me a Percocet and a gin.
It's gonna be a long night, kiddo.
Peter, I'm not asking you
to slip me the review, man.
Give me a temperature reading.
Warm, lukewarm.
Cool, medium-cool.
In the old days,
everyone helped each other.
Listen, Peter.
How about we...
Okay.
What?
He couldn't get it. Sorry.
- I can't bear waiting.
- I know.
What kind of publicist are you?
The kind that invests
in friends' shows, David.
Hey, Michael.
We gonna run in your column?
You know who showed?
We had everyone. Here.
Cary Launer. Scavullo.
Betty Bacall. Pat Lawford.
Excuse me. Everyone.
I didn't see any of these people.
Look over there. Who do you see?
Joe Torre. Lou Reed.
Doesn't matter. Put it in.
You gonna come to my benefit?
This INS thing we're doing?
Deportations.
It's gonna be important
to make a showing.
- Like the old days.
- More lefty choir practice.
- Thanks. I think I'll pass.
- Oh.
How about the show?
You like it?
Okay.
All right.
Who else RS VP'd for tomorrow?
- We hear from Regis?
- No.
Get Regis. Who, then?
A few legal-aid types.
An assistant from VH 1.
Someone from the Morris office.
You get on the phone.
Get people.
Get Regis and Joy to confirm.
I want Regis.
It's midnight, Eli.
And the new, regrettably named
musical comedy "Flypaper"
is more like that other
substance that attracts flies.
I told him to change
the fucking title.
Three Nigerians
who are being deported.
They're among the casualties
of a mass INS roundup
who are still being detained.
As for the detainees,
held for 200 days,
time and appeals are running out.
It seems certain that unless
some compromise is reached,
they will be deported.
The mayor, who has adamantly
defended the INS positions,
had this response.
Leon.
Tomorrow night I got
this benefit for racial unity.
It's great, you know?
Black and white and all that?
I'm on the committee.
So call Ross.
You're on a list.
Okay?
Federal authorities are deporting
these young men.
The city is obligated
to assist the feds.
This isn't about race.
This is Eli.
I'm having this benefit
tomorrow night
for these guys they're deporting
at the Palm.
So call Ross.
You're on a list.
Thank you.
Hello?
Hey! Cary!
Where are you?
Stay where you are.
I'm coming. I'm coming.
- Good evening, Mr. Wurman.
- Thank you, Fred.
Okay.
Where were you?
I mean, that show.
Come on. What was that?
Oh, come on.
People who are friends produced it.
So I had to help out.
You know. No big deal.
It's called loyalty.
Something movie stars sitting in
fancy cars don't know about.
When are you gonna get a cellphone?
I don't know. Not my style.
Besides, I hear they give you tumors.
How many of these you need?
- I've been looking for you.
- Uh-huh.
I got an awkward.
What's her name?
This girl got herself
in jail downtown.
We flew back from the coast together.
She's really a super girl.
Uh-huh.
There's a plane waiting for her
at Teterboro on me.
So you want me to bail her out
and take her to the plane.
It's Jilli Hopper.
The model.
She's got that show.
Pussies and lasers and shit.
I know who she is.
Plays that girl spy.
- I know.
- Yeah.
Oh, she looks like
she's a vacuum cleaner, Cary.
Jesus.
I was flying back.
I gave her a ride.
She had some fashion shoot.
We hung out.
Don't you have a girlfriend?
You're not supposed to be
where you're not supposed to be.
You don't have to do this.
Why are you fighting it?
Come to my benefit.
Oh, please.
Do you really need me?
- It sounds so...
- It's getting late.
You come, say a few words
about the Constitution,
wrongful imprisonment.
Or get someone else
to clean up your messes
when you breeze back into town.
Are you blackmailing
your only client?
Hey, we're old men.
We're doing favors for each other.
Well, I favor you
with a monthly check, I believe.
Shalom, big boy.
Because I'm too old to be
going out Manhattan South
for horny movie stars.
We ended up in the wrong place.
This girl, she gets around.
She likes to play it slumming,
and it bit her in the ass.
Man, you know,
you behave like it's 1970
and you're still living in Malibu.
There may be somebody
from one of the papers there.
You're gonna come to my thing
at the Palm.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Two, three.
Shit.
- What are you here for, Eli?
- They're having a raffle.
I thought I'd just see
if I get lucky.
What's the prize?
The TV starlet, maybe?
You don't have
that many clients anymore.
I can figure it out.
Better if you tell me.
Who am I telling? Norris Volpe
or the "New York Post"?
You didn't invite me to your benefit.
I like causes.
Should've put me on the list.
You're invited. You sit at
my table next to Cary Launer.
- Done deal.
- He won't show.
Her network has me on retainer.
This thing leaks, I'm out.
You take the food out of my mouth.
Norris, I need the job.
Please.
The only reason
that schmaltz works for me
is you're so moth-eaten.
If I fucked you, there'd be nobody
from the old days
for me to play with.
Pervy little tabloid cocksucker.
I heard that.
Ms. Hopper,
we need your date of birth.
Yeah. Right.
Ms. Hopper,
I'm Jerome Eli Wurman.
Took long enough.
Where's the car? I stink.
Since when did this town start
arresting people for having fun?
You tell me.
Got to check everything, 'cause
they go through your stuff
like it's a fucking grab bag.
Yeah.
Well, it's all right.
We don't live in a town
with a morals clause.
Where are you from?
Georgia. Listen.
You need some sleep
and something in your stomach.
You'll be as good as new.
Believe me.
Come on.
It's all right.
Yeah.
This is why I don't come back
to New York.
Because I fall right on my ass
every time.
Yeah. I know.
I just wish I had a little
perfume or something.
Listen.
I got a good doctor.
He's a quiet little pussycat.
You know what I'm saying?
You got any Xanax?
You want Xanax from me?
Let's see what I got
in the drugstore.
Pills, pills.
Here you go.
A little Xanax.
Can I interest you
in something like
a nice cobb salad or papaya?
Some matzo ball soup
like my mama used to make?
Hmm?
Back in Georgia?
Yeah.
You all right?
Come on.
This must be fun for you.
It is.
I love it.
Squiring a pretty girl around town.
Sure.
The network's being
pretty nice to me, sending...
What, you're the East Coast
V.P. Of casting
or something?
Really.
So, what time is your call?
It's noon.
If I get the 6:00 a.m. Flight,
I'll make it.
We're gonna take you over
your hotel and get you packed
and then take you
on over to Teterboro,
where Cary has a plane
to take you back to the coast.
All right?
Cary.
Cary Launer.
You're a fucking Cary Launer lapdog?
That's great.
- That's just great.
- Easy, now. Come on.
I see.
Where is he?
Whoa.
Oh, no, no.
You don't want to do that!
Please.
Please, honey.
Please don't do that.
Just calm yourself.
It's okay.
It's all right.
Please.
Did he ask if I had
something for him?
No.
Turn around.
We're gonna go downtown.
Wall Street.
Excuse me?
Wally, no.
Don't.
Turn around.
Turn the fucking car around.
- Just two minutes.
- Turn it, Wally.
He's an asshole.
This is true.
Oh, I hate to see people
get into messes.
I handled a lot of stars
back in the day.
I had Monty Clift.
I had Mama Cass.
Fat lot of good you did them.
Well, all I can tell you,
the clock is ticking away.
Hear me?
It's ticking away.
Where you going, folks?
Summerwear showroom.
So, how long you been
Cary Launer's Gotham butt boy?
You'll make this quick.
'Cause I got a big day tomorrow.
Okay?
You got to pick up
the movie star's dirty laundry?
No, I got to drop it off
at an airfield
so it can fly back home on its own.
Touch, little fella.
You know what my mama used to say?
Good manners make for good memories.
Bad manners make for goodbyes.
Who the fuck is your mama?
Harriet Beecher Stowe?
Great.
A literary whore.
No wonder Cary likes you.
It's a long way up, hmm?
You don't look so great.
Are you okay?
I'm having a peach of a time.
Aside from the blood in my urine.
And you.
That's kind of smart.
Do you like Ecstasy?
Oh, I love it.
But not tonight.
See, I'm being a good boy tonight.
Yeah.
I can tell.
If you happen to know
anybody here, don't say hello.
That's gonna be tough.
I know everyone.
Not here, you don't.
This will just take a second.
Here goes.
Oh. Hi, Jilli. Back so soon?
No pagers, no cellphones.
Oh, no, no.
I don't believe in cellphones.
They give you cancer.
No pens, no money,
no recording devices,
wallets, or chewing gum.
Oh, that's sugarless.
These will be returned to you
on your way out.
Tell Serge I'm here, all right?
Oh, he already knows.
Elliot?
- Hi.
- Eli.
I've been trying to reach you
about my benefit.
I didn't know you came to this place.
I'm not gonna read about this,
page 6 of the "Post"?
Come on.
That's a friend.
Jilli, honey, how you doing, sweetie?
Fuck you, Elliot.
So you're gonna come to my thing
at the Palm.
We need to help these poor boys.
Well, it's a terrible thing.
But don't hustle me here.
That's bad form.
What is this place, anyway?
Eli, this place is everything
a bent little Southern boy
like you could possibly want.
Huh?
Go. Look.
Touch. Play. Feel.
What is this place?
What is the big deal?
I don't know.
You know who that is?
That's Elliot Sharansky.
He's worth billions.
Oh, my God.
Opium?
Good nose.
You were here with Cary?
Oh, yeah.
Oh, you must be a very bad influence.
Because I know my boy, and
Cary Launer never does drugs.
Yeah. Maybe.
He sure as shit likes to watch
other people do them, right?
How long has this place been here?
It floats.
Well, I don't know
the right people, I guess.
Come on, kiddo.
We'll go to the Odeon
for a burger and a vodka.
I'll listen to you talk
about your life.
- We can't stay here.
- I'm trying to find my thing.
Go ahead.
Now, I'm tempted.
It's right off the boat from Myanmar.
Well, in that case.
- Do it.
- I can't do this.
Boy, you have a nice smile, kiddo.
You do modeling?
'Cause my name's Eli Wurman,
and I do a lot of events.
Maybe if you want to drop by.
My card.
What is that thing
you're looking for, anyway?
My little toy.
Oh.
I need a constant distraction
or I lose control.
Do you believe that?
Control is very important.
Because without it,
there's indiscretion,
which is a cardinal sin.
So true, Jilli.
Hey, Serge.
The man knows.
- This is Eli.
- How do you do?
- Serge.
- Eli.
Serge.
We got to talk.
Mm-hmm.
I love your setup here.
About what happened earlier?
I was fucked up.
I didn't realize how bad it was.
Oh, Jilli, darling.
Nigerians.
The INS deportees...
It's too late for that.
Let's just say our goodbyes.
Shit.
Listen, Serge.
I didn't mean to.
I have to come back, okay?
I want to come back.
Everyone's hands are tied.
It's time for you to move on.
No.
It happens to everyone.
We all have our time.
Wait a second.
Serge, it was a joke.
I'm joking.
You know me.
Jilli, Jilli.
- Why?
- You know the rules.
How many times do I have to tell you?
Wait.
Remember what you did
earlier tonight?
What did I do?
I don't know what I did.
- I don't...
- Goodbye.
I don't know what I did!
Where's my toy?
Where's my fucking toy, you bastard?
This?
You're too old for this.
I got all you guys now.
It's all right, honey.
I fucking hate that guy.
Yeah.
All right, darling.
Okay, honey.
I'm gonna take care of you.
I'll get you home.
Get all this stuff cleaned up
and settle in
and get you on that plane.
Here you go.
There you go, darling.
Come on.
Come on.
I got you.
That's fine.
You're gonna be fine.
There you are.
Ooh, man.
There's paparazzi at the hotel.
Oh, you just leave that
to little old Eli.
I'll take care of you there, honey.
I don't want you.
I want Cary.
Well, you're just stuck
with me, honey.
Hey, Ms. Hopper!
Ms. Hopper!
Come on!
How about a picture?
Come on!
Look over here!
Ms. Hopper!
Let's be quick.
Okay, honey?
So pack up, now.
This is not a room.
It's a vagina.
And how would you know
what a vagina looks like?
Well...
Room service.
I need two Monte Cristos.
One on sourdough
and the other a double corona.
Oh, see...
one is a sandwich,
and the other is a cigar.
What do you want?
I'd like one of them...
Italian antiacids.
Fizzle in the water
like a science experiment.
What's it called?
Brioschi?
Why don't you call and see?
Okay.
There were vigils for the deportees.
Demonstrators spent the day
in front of City Hall.
No. Don't.
Don't change the channel.
Come on.
You got to pack, honey.
We're gonna do something here.
Fuck.
Cary, how fucking dare you send
a fucking publicist?
You know what?
You know what?
I have lists of all you fat,
old, impotent fucks!
Oh! Jeez.
Maybe I'm just a cracker
from down South, but...
what you want to go back
to hustling for?
Who said I was a hustler?
- Well...
- No.
Put down my underwear.
I don't know.
See...
Fuck.
You wouldn't want to take a nap
with me, would you, honey?
You know?
Just crawl up on the bed here
for a half-hour or so?
And do what?
Fuck?
That a challenge?
Well... I have to say.
You look like someone
who doesn't like to touch
other people.
I need it to be romantic.
I can do romantic.
Please.
Don't.
What do you and Cary do?
Hmm?
He likes games.
Sports.
Like baseball?
Football?
Polo?
Ping-pong?
Less physical, you know?
More like chess.
You look terrible.
Are you okay?
Well, you think this is what
I want to do with my life?
I want to spend my nights like this?
He calls, I come.
His slave.
Everybody's looking for
an out clause.
But you got to do it soon.
Okay, honey?
'Cause you don't look like
you can take
much more of this shit.
I'm gonna wash my face.
I'm gonna clean myself up.
I can't do this with you.
I'm getting out soon.
I got some property in the Tidewater.
And I'm gonna build me
a little shack on the water.
Well, it sounds good to me.
You can come anytime.
Oh, Jesus.
These hotel room lights.
I tell you.
I love the country.
It's nice.
Pastoral.
Oh, man.
I look like Dracula's
Uncle Morty from Kiev.
Oh, man.
I should be embalmed.
Oh, my God.
Oh, man.
Sandy? Sandy?
Did you get my message?
It's Eli.
I call you.
Well, don't you call back?
What kind of doctor are you?
Listen.
I'm definitely seeing blood
in my urine now.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't...
Did I have too many beets?
Oh, Jesus, Sandy.
What are you?
Man, I don't know.
Maybe I had too many drugs.
Did you ever think of that?
Maybe it's the lights in here.
Oh, shit.
I don't know.
Oh, it's the whole thing, Sandy.
I went to Harvard.
I went to Harvard Law.
You should see what I got
in the other room.
I got a starlet in there
with more drugs than I've ever seen.
We could start a fucking cartel.
Yeah.
I know.
I'll just take some Ambien.
I will take some Ambien.
Yes. Yes.
I know. I'll get some sleep.
Sandy.
Oh, Sandy.
You gonna come to my benefit?
You coming tonight?
Yes.
Ahmet Ertegun, no.
Paula Abdul, no.
Eartha Kitt, maybe.
And Kelly Klein wants to know
if she can bring Tina Chow's sister.
What?
Time to get up.
Barry called.
He's not sure
he's gonna be back in time.
Nor is Sandy.
But Calvin is coming late, maybe.
And Ross Bleckner wants to
bring Larry Rivers.
Who RS VP'd?
Did Regis?
Did you get him?
No.
Dr. Napier is here.
Sandy? Why?
You seem to have called him
about blood in your urine
in the middle of the night.
I did?
Yeah.
And then again, like an hour later,
about your life and taking
a whore to an airport.
A what?
I don't know.
Eli, are you sure you're okay?
Yeah.
You got the seating chart?
Wrong glasses, E.
No.
Don't put the Grants next to the bar.
They're gonna make noise all
night trying to get martinis.
- What's the matter with you?
- I don't know.
I got to train you 24-7.
All right.
You work on my speech?
Here's a draft.
Jilli Hopper.
You know, that hot model
and star of the USA Network's
"Assassina."
Yeah. All of that...
What do you think?
You're no Ted Sorensen.
Who's that?
Your blood pressure is even
a little higher than usual.
What does that mean?
It may have something to do
with what's going on down there.
Oh, you know,
I got this big night tonight.
I got these poor boys
being persecuted.
You really don't remember calling me?
No.
Eli, you're taking too much stuff.
I know.
You're right.
But you give me all this stuff.
What is this crap you're giving me?
Oh, come on.
Do you mix these things?
Huh? What else?
Well, I might have had
some opium with some E.
Would that make me see things?
Gee, I don't know, Eli.
What do you think?
Of course you're hallucinating.
Restoril, Elavil, speed,
yohimbe, Zocor, Sonata.
I said just take a couple of Ambien.
Of course you're blacking out.
This would black out
the Oakland Raiders.
I'm not blacking out.
Come on.
I just got stuff on my mind.
Did you write a check
for the defense fund?
Who do I make it out to?
The Nabante-Makabeni
defense fund.
These things you get involved with.
These are innocent guys.
You can't just go rounding people up
because they're foreigners.
This town used to open up.
It's become a police state.
Nobody cares.
Nobody's doing anything about it.
The Transport Worker Union says
they'll strike
against the B-line
and Liberty Bus Lines
if they don't get
an acceptable offer by midnight.
We hear from Cary?
Yeah. He's not coming.
Where do we seat Dick Holbrooke?
Oh, I don't know.
Next to Stephanopoulos.
Wherever he is.
I want you to messenger
another invitation
to Elliot Sharansky right away.
Who?
You don't know who he is?
Huge money guy?
Do you read anything
besides "Entertainment Weekly"?
- No.
- Look him up.
Find him.
Come on.
Eli. You were gonna look
at my head shots today with me.
Michael. I forgot.
We were supposed to meet.
- I'm so sorry.
- That's okay.
Ross, Michael is a model.
- And he's an actor. Writer.
- Yeah, I know.
Maybe we could hook him up
with some agents.
You're late.
They're in your office.
- Who?
- The committee.
You agreed to some meeting in Harlem.
Oh, shit.
I blanked.
You're doing a lot of that.
Don't be such a smartass, huh?
Just back me up.
Don't cut me down.
Jesus.
I'm sorry, Michael.
Come to this thing tonight.
Oh, hey.
Yeah.
A lot of people to meet.
We got Cary Launer.
No, we can't have the small room.
Tonight, then?
Thanks, Eli.
Because we agreed from the beginning
that we have the main floor.
What's this?
Who are you talking to?
Romeo at the Palm.
They want to move us
to the small room.
- Some event for fashion week.
- Oh, no.
Elsa Nye wants...
Oh, her? That whore.
She used to work for me.
I fucked her.
She's always trying to...
Hello, Romeo?
Listen, honey.
This is a special event.
Hello? Hello?
Romeo?
Damn it! I'm on hold.
What's the matter with you?
Can't you be in sync with me?
I don't know what direction
you're going.
Just call Cary. He's gonna try
to get out of this thing.
Death of
"Assassina" star Jilli Hopper.
Who'd they say died?
I don't know.
I'm trying to find Cary.
We're late, Eli.
We've got to get to Harlem.
Well, we all got to get
to Harlem, honey.
Black people under this mayor
and under this government.
Taught to fear us and hate us.
That's what tonight's about.
Eli, don't spin out of control
when we see Reverend Blunt.
- It took a lot of hard work...
- I'm gonna be a pussycat!
Come on.
Besides, all the brothers love me.
Every couple years,
some white folks come up here
with a plan.
You talk about civil liberties,
the Constitution.
Those are just words, man.
Our children cannot move freely
through the streets.
They round up young black men
and throw the keys away.
This is a Warsaw ghetto.
And it is being ignored.
We agree, Reverend Blunt.
And we want to do something.
We want to make a beachhead.
And your little tea party,
your little cocktail party does that?
To protest one incident?
I don't think so.
We will not be in attendance.
Reverend.
Reverend Blunt, you have
a lot of charisma, sir.
But you do not have a voice
below 125th Street.
Wouldn't it be nice if you were heard
all the way down on Wall Street?
What do we get
out of sanctioning you?
Reverend, our coalition is
made up of people
from the media.
We have thrown in our lot
with the Upper West Side
Triangulation.
You know what that got us?
- Bupkes.
- Amen.
By "Upper West Side,"
you do mean Jewish?
Where were they when we needed them?
We have been fighting
the mayor alone.
Everybody.
Everyone went establishment.
So no, we do not need the
laying on of sympathetic hands.
We have God.
We don't need friends!
- What we need...
- Is exposure.
You need to be heard.
You need to be heard
below 125th Street.
You need to be heard all the way
from Oakland to Washington.
Publicity.
That's what you need.
Otherwise you're just gonna be
another babbling voice in the dark.
Names, Reverend.
You need names
in order to beget power.
You need names.
And we can give them to you.
We got the Kennedys,
which begets the DNC,
which begets the ACLU,
which begets
the "New York Times."
We got artists.
We got stars, Reverend Blunt.
Stars.
These days they're the only ones
catch the light.
The only ones.
You come tonight,
and you're gonna get me.
And you're gonna get
the people I know.
The people I know.
Yes, sir.
I know everyone.
Now, what is that worth to you?
Sir, is that worth one night?
Give me one night.
I'm gonna give you recognition.
So you can do something
for your people
instead of just howling in the dark.
I came here today
because of something
that happened in my lifetime.
I marched with Reverend King, sir.
I held his hand,
and we walked through the fire.
Take my hand.
Come on, man.
Why don't you just take my hand?
Mr. Wurman,
I have 10 events tonight.
Now, what makes yours so special?
Oh, stars, Reverend.
Stars.
Such as?
Such as Cary Launer.
The movie star?
The movie star.
Yeah.
Well, we have Jesus and Allah.
I believe they are bigger names.
I don't know.
I think you been
on the street too long.
I think even them folk need
a little press these days.
Competition is strong.
Attention spans are getting
shorter and shorter.
You come tonight, Reverend.
You come and you make a showing.
You bring people together.
Our elders have prepared lunch.
Would you care to join us?
I'm sorry, Reverend.
But I'm supposed to be meeting
my sister-in-law
half an hour ago.
You bring your friends down tonight.
We'll see if we can come together.
The Jews, the stars,
and all the brothers.
That's called "horse racing," right?
Hallelujah.
Hi, Angus.
Angus, I'm late.
Eli, Ross called.
You have to call him.
I don't have to do anything.
There's a policeman asking for you.
Not now, Angus.
Thank you.
There you are.
I know I'm late.
Hey, you.
- I'm so sorry about last night.
- That's okay.
That awful play?
It's gonna close in a week.
And now I'm late.
It's okay.
You're here.
I'm so glad to see you.
How are you, Eli?
I'm good.
My doctor says I have the heart
of a 17-year-old.
And I know you too well
to believe that.
Oh, it's so great to see you.
You're such a tonic.
In the cab over here, I was thinking,
"Here I am, gonna see this person.
Finally get to be straight
with someone.
Don't have to sidestep
and all that stuff."
I'm so tired of it.
How you doing, honey?
I'm okay.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
Everything strikes me
as being funny these days.
I know what you mean.
I have something for you.
Adrian wanted you to have this.
It's your favorite book, isn't it?
I think you gave it to him
when he graduated college.
You can have it, honey.
Eli, please.
I don't know that I have the strength
to talk about
my little brother, Vicki.
We both miss him, Eli.
Well, it's been three years, sweetie.
You have to just finally...
I saw you last night
working the room.
You looked ashen and miserable.
Hustling.
Well, I'm a PR guy, honey.
That's what I do.
I get items in papers.
I suck up to celebrities.
But every once in a while,
I get to do something worthwhile.
Like this benefit tonight.
I worry about you, E.
I do.
What is this about, Vicki?
Do you mind if we go upstairs?
I don't want to melt in here.
Of course.
It's a nonsmoking room, Eli.
Oh.
Well...
Why you crying, Vicki?
'Cause you're almost your brother.
I'm a third of him.
I came here with an absurd plan.
You did?
What is it?
I'm a woman on a mission.
Which is?
Remember after his funeral?
The things you said to me about
all the things you wanted.
Children and quiet.
Oh, I don't know.
Why don't you have someone
in your life?
Anyone, E.
Why?
Because everyone's alone
in this town.
Is that your motto?
The PR man's creed.
"Everyone's alone in this town"?
You were going to change
the world, Eli.
To do what I do,
you got to harden yourself.
Until what?
You're barely recognizable?
Oh, come on.
You shouldn't worry about me.
I'm tough.
And I came here 'cause
I thought you might be ready.
Ready to split?
- Yes.
- Oh.
Yeah.
Not so easy.
- Yes, it is, sweetie.
- No.
You just forgot the route.
No.
You don't understand.
They get you under contract,
then they close the escape clauses.
And the bridges.
And then the tunnels.
And then you're stuck.
Forever.
Do you think we'll ever know
why your brother killed himself?
Some people just get tired, honey.
You know?
And they quit early.
- And the others survive.
- Mmh.
Is that what we're doing, E?
We're surviving?
Don't underestimate it.
It's harder than it looks.
You come to my benefit tonight,
you'd see.
You gonna come?
I'll come if you want me to.
I do.
Remember when the three of us
marched in Selma?
Oh, you were this
little 12-year-old.
You were so brave.
All that early promise.
Maybe that's the reason
I'm not leaving.
I want to just live up to some of it.
You know, I squandered whole
sections of my life, Vicki.
I'm just trying to...
I'm trying not to
dribble all of it away.
Well, I have a pass.
How's that work?
Now, honey.
What are we doing?
What are we doing?
I wish I knew.
You came up from Virginia to get me.
Ridiculous, isn't it?
Yes.
And just about...
sweetest thing anyone's ever done.
E?
Hey.
Um, honey,
we're not thinking clearly.
No.
Maybe we are.
No.
Utterly clear.
But...
- But...
- But...
But you're my brother's wife.
Widow.
I got so much work to do
before tonight.
You coming?
Don't worry.
I'll be there.
It's okay.
All right, then.
I don't care if police
are looking to talk to me.
We have a benefit.
No, Ross. Listen to me.
I want to know who's singing.
Is it Jon Hendricks?
Is it Annie Ross?
Is it Bernadette Peters?
I want to know by the time I get
to Sandy's office, you hear?
Yeah.
It's a black thing.
Get a black person.
Oh!
I'm so sorry.
Hi, Rita.
You mean I don't have to wait?
Oh!
What is it?
Hanukkah?
He wanted to see you.
And you have several messages.
Your office needs you
to call A.S.A.P.
I have to see you first.
Get in here now.
What's the matter?
My cholesterol too high?
What happened last night?
I don't know.
What do you mean?
You called me at dawn screaming,
"Jilli Hopper! Jilli Hopper!"
I was?
Well, I had a bad night.
Well, it's all over the news.
"TV Star O.D.'s
in East Side Hotel."
What do you mean?
What the hell is the matter with you?
You told me you were
with Jilli Hopper
and there were all these drugs.
I don't remember.
- The woman is dead, Eli.
- Oh, no.
She O.D.'d.
Did you see her do it?
I don't know.
Listen, sweetie.
I'm your pal.
What is this?
I been so tired lately.
Maybe we should
check you in somewhere.
Shut up for a minute.
I just got to think.
I have to think.
Oh, man.
Oh, poor girl.
She was just doing fine.
She was sleeping.
And I left.
I think.
You think?
She's a friend.
She had gotten herself
into little troubles.
I bailed her out of Manhattan South,
and then I gave her a ride
back to her hotel,
Hotel D'Orsay, and I left.
Look, don't be covering
for Cary Launer.
Oh, Cary's got nothing
to do with this.
Oh, yeah?
I know he was screwing her.
I know everything
about everyone, sweetheart.
He sent her to me.
She had gastritis
or the clap or something.
I know he's your bread
and butter, but he's a bad guy.
I don't remember anything.
I can't believe she's dead.
Were you doing smack
with this girl, Eli?
Were you having a party?
If you saw something...
- I didn't see a thing.
- Okay.
It's the medication, Sandy.
I'm just mixing all these pills.
You take sleeping pills,
you don't sleep.
You get turned.
You get turned around inside.
- I'm mixing the wrong pills.
- You are the wrong pill.
Mr. Wurman,
your assistant is on the phone.
He said to tell you
Jon Hendricks is confirmed.
He also said Elliot Sharansky
has been trying you all day.
Thank you, Rita.
Thank you.
- Sharansky.
- Yeah.
Big-time society Jew.
That's the one.
You hitting him up for money
for your African brothers?
Come on.
Don't say it like that.
You know what's going on.
The mayor goes on a roundup,
hands all the colored who don't
have green cards over to INS.
You think that's right, Sandy?
I can walk in the park
without getting mugged.
Yeah, right.
Quality of life. I know.
Whose life?
How about yours, pal?
You're like something
out of Yellowstone.
Oh, come on.
I'm not an easy patient.
But don't go busting my balls.
It's not about being easy.
It's about keeping you alive.
- I'm having a bad time.
- Take it easy.
This is not a joke.
I don't know what happened
to that girl.
- Take it easy.
- Don't "easy" me.
Come on.
I don't know what I'm seeing
half the time.
I don't remember things.
I can't sleep unless I got
a gallon of pills in me.
Oh, something's fucking wrong.
This is not my life.
This is not my life.
I can't...
I can't live like this.
Look. Here.
Take these Valium.
Let's do your cystoscopy.
Come on.
Dr. Feelgood.
Maybe it's your fucking fault
I'm turning into Janis Joplin.
We'll just look around
and see what's what down there.
I'll tell you what's down there.
Missed chances and wasted times.
That's what you're gonna find
in my reproductive system.
Maybe the keys to my car.
Oh, yeah?
What do you drive?
She's got such a nice
bedside manner, Sandy.
Maybe I should marry her.
You always want to marry women
who hurt you?
Oh, honey.
What you're doing to my penis
is a whole lot less horrible
than most people I know do to it.
I'm glad to hear that,
because the next 45 seconds
is gonna hurt.
I don't feel so great.
Last time I was in Athens, Georgia,
I cried 'cause my mama
and daddy lived and died.
There's a girl named Victoria
in Virginia.
And I should've married her
but my brother did.
I graduated from Harvard Law
fourth in my class.
But I never practiced
because I wanted to suck cock
in Hollywood too badly.
Easy now, Eli.
Shh. Easy. Easy.
- I didn't see.
- You look clean.
There is some irritation
I have to keep an eye on.
I didn't see.
I wasn't there.
I wasn't there.
I wasn't there.
Be still. You're gonna fall.
We're flying to fucking Morocco!
It's over! The year is over!
It is not over.
Get in the car.
You promised me a full year
from the first time we fucked.
Get in the car.
No. It's over.
Get in the car.
I gave you everything you wanted.
And now we're done.
Get in the car!
? It's over, it's over?
? THe bad year is over?
No more nasty smells!
? It's over, it's over?
? THe bad year is over?
? No more nasty smell?
So, Eli, what's the skinny?
Oh, not now, Michael.
What are you planning
on doing with "Flypaper"?
The show didn't even get
one good review.
I know.
I can't talk right now.
Well, give me something.
I'm on deadline.
Are you okay, Eli?
Okay.
Here's a quote for you.
Are you ready?
You are... quote...
a loveless urban cunt, Michael.
A, uh...
Inflamed pustule.
A hemorrhoid.
And even your mama knows it,
which is why she is ashamed
at having fucked you.
But she needed the money.
End quote.
Okay.
Jon Hendricks' manager
needs you to call him.
Elliot Sharansky will see you
at his office at 5:00.
He says he has a big donation
for your cause.
I want you to get me
a double-double espresso.
Send some magnolias to Vicki
at her hotel.
And did Regis call?
No, not yet.
What do I have to do
to get you to actually do
some work around here?
Do you need an assistant?
I can get you one.
Cary's in your office.
Hmm.
Protests
and vigils are planned for...
Hey, pal.
Where you been?
Refusal to hear the case.
At a protest earlier, several
black leaders were arrested,
including the Reverend
Lyle Blunt of the Harlem force.
We have a mayor
on a political mission
to deprive the black man
of his God-given rights!
So, what do you think of him?
False prophet.
Probably.
So you heard about Jilli Hopper.
Yeah. I don't know
what this world's become.
It's like a high-speed
trash heap.
Well, she was clearly
headed for trouble.
Eli, I have Regis.
Okay.
Oh.
Hi, Rege.
How you doing?
Are you gonna come
to my thing tonight?
Oh, well, we got everybody.
We got, uh, Mailer and Hamill.
Lee Grant.
Cyndi Lauper.
John and Joan Dunne.
The list goes on and on.
Great, Rege.
Great!
I love you.
Oh, thank you so much.
Bye.
Well, there you have it.
Dr. Publicity in action.
What the hell went on last night?
I don't know.
I don't know.
Kind of blurry.
She give you anything for me?
No.
Okay. Well...
75 G's.
That's a year's severance.
You're firing me, Cary?
Again?
Well, here's the thing.
There's some talk.
People have approached me.
Some smart people.
And they think I can snatch
O'Horrigan's Senate seat.
You want to be a senator?
I'm sorry.
I didn't get much sleep.
I'm overtired.
Uh, okay.
A Democrat, of course.
One never knows with you.
Hey, I'm sure it's funny.
But remember this.
I go back.
I go back to Bobby.
To Gene McCarthy.
I got some credibility here, man.
Oh, Cary.
You are not seriously
contemplating this.
What are you gonna do?
Drive around and kiss babies?
Come on, man.
You're used to a private jet.
A suite at the Carlyle.
You live in a fucking hotel, man.
I don't have to kiss anybody.
I can go on "Nightline"
and "Larry King"
because of who I am.
Well, if you're really serious
about this...
If you're seriously thinking
of doing this thing,
then you're gonna need me.
Why would you drop me now?
Listen, if I'm really serious
about this,
I'm gonna need young
and energetic people around me.
So you can suck them dry.
I introduced you to the Panthers.
You never met a black man
till I took you to Lenox Lounge.
You're off the picture.
I'm just here to say goodbye.
A girl who had it all.
Rhodes scholar, TV star.
I think they left out
"call girl."
Jilli Hopper's body being
removed from the D'Orsay Hotel.
Nah.
She wasn't a hooker.
She was just an actress acting.
For 30 years I picked up
the pieces after you.
Like the man at the circus who
cleans up after the elephant.
You're just gonna drop me now?
E., listen to me.
Everybody has their time.
We're very good friends.
Think about that.
You don't want to spoil
our friendship.
You're supposed to be there
for me tonight, man.
You know this thing is
important to me.
Before you go, Cary,
I just want to ask one question.
You think if Jilli Hopper
hadn't come to New York with you
on your little field trip
to an opium den,
you think maybe, just maybe,
she'd be alive today?
What are you saying?
Don't forget how much I know.
Go on, Cary.
Walk out on me.
Go on.
I think someone killed her.
I think I saw it.
How about that?
Can you just see
those "Post" headlines?
"Starlet's Last Binge with
Movie Star/Senator Lothario"?
Come on, Cary.
You're always gonna need someone
to pick up the pieces
you leave in your wake.
And they have to be someone
with no real center.
No real soul.
Someone who'll do absolutely
anything and then cover it up.
Because... they're loyal.
And they believe in the guy.
Where you gonna find
someone like that?
Like an Ehrlichman or a Haldeman?
Come on.
I'm not Nixon.
I'm not so sure about that.
I told people you'd be there, man.
It's my name on the line!
Ross?
Order me a car to go to Sharansky's.
There's no cars for you, E.
I beg your pardon?
They cut you off.
You haven't paid.
What do you mean I haven't paid?
That's your job, asshole.
More on the tragic life
of a TV starlet and model.
From promising
lvy-League beginnings
to a lonely end in a Midtown hotel.
We'll have reports
from Hollywood and Paris.
There's cash on the desk.
Take some.
Pay everyone I owe,
including yourself.
A picture is emerging
of a troubled life
and her ongoing battle
with substance abuse.
We'll have all that and more.
Stand by.
Pete in the Bronx, you're on.
If people from lawless,
Third-World countries
come here and break laws,
they should be deported.
Who would want to listen
to this shit?
Change it, please.
Could you change it, please?
Driver, you ever drop people off
or pick them up
down by Wall Street late at night?
Like 12:00 midnight
or 2:00 in the morning?
Sometimes.
Keep the change.
Summer Showroom?
- 47.
- Thank you.
Can I help you, sir?
Uh...
No, that's...
- Eli.
- Elliot.
- Come on in. Nice to see you.
- Nice to see you.
Sit down.
It means so much when people
venture all the way down here.
Sit down.
Have some coffee.
Very good coffee.
Thank you.
You went to college with my brother.
I did. Israel. Yeah.
Yeah. Izzy.
He died, you know.
- Yeah.
- O.D.'d.
So sad.
Yeah, it was sad.
Well, in any event,
it's good to have you come down
and see us so quickly.
It would mean so much if you
came to my benefit tonight.
Elliot, it would make
such a powerful statement
if you were there.
By the way, it was very good
to see you last night.
Last night?
Oh.
You were at the opening
of "Flypaper"?
Okay.
Well, tell us about tonight.
We're very interested.
Who, if I may, is "we"?
Tom Silverton.
Sorry, Eli.
This is Tom Silverton.
We're a little group.
We meet, have lunch, discuss things.
Sometimes we try
and make ourselves heard.
Above the din.
Above the din.
And many of us were involved
in the civil rights movement.
Well, you wield a great deal
of influence, Elliot.
If you came,
it would make a difference.
Who would be there with us?
You mean from the black community?
Well, we'd have a good cross section.
Because we were wondering
about Reverend Blunt.
Yeah.
Well, I saw him earlier today.
And he has got a fabulous program.
Teaching stonemasonry to the kids.
I believe he referred to us
as "hook-nosed Satans."
He's no Reverend King.
He's not even Al Sharpton.
No. But he's receptive.
It wouldn't be such a bad idea
to open a dialogue.
I think something would come of that.
And you can give us assurance
this is serious?
I wouldn't be involved if it wasn't.
My God.
That's what I do.
That's my life.
No. I can imagine.
Eli, there's gonna be a Senate
race in this state very soon.
- Yeah?
- We need to run someone
who's gonna beat
this cocksucker mayor.
Of course.
Your client is not that person.
My client?
You mean Cary Launer?
Yeah. He's been a no-show
at many lunches here.
And we've done the numbers.
In the end,
the mayor will tear him apart.
Because of your boy.
This fatuous, debauched party boy
playing out a fantasy of '60s glory.
He's going to lose us
an absolutely vital seat
in the United States Senate.
I don't know.
Am I missing something here?
Miss Hopper give you anything
last night?
Perhaps something for Cary Launer?
No.
You know what that is?
No.
It's a children's toy, Eli.
You attach this to it.
It becomes a camera.
Takes digital images
you can download onto a computer
and then onto the Internet.
Serge gave her her toy back,
not knowing what it was.
She was taking pictures, Eli.
Sandy?
What are you doing here?
They got pictures of you on there?
Is that what this is?
Pictures of Elliot?
Cary?
There are Websites
for such things, Mr. Wurman.
People blackmailed.
Lives broken.
Ruined.
For money and power.
The images, they...
Well, they end up on the Internet.
It's politics, Eli.
It's just politics.
We feel the images from that toy
could influence Mr. Launer
in his decision on whether to run.
This is a good thing,
how I'm trying to do this benefit.
It's not about elections.
Politicians come and go.
It's about people who are powerless.
Now, Mr. Sharansky,
you have so much power.
You use it wisely.
I would say the same to you,
my friend.
Did someone kill that girl
over a toy?
Eli, you're not thinking clearly.
We're civic leaders, Eli.
Harry Gould back there is a rabbi.
Tom Hiler is on the board
of the ACLU.
We're concerned about the
political future of our state,
which, by the way,
is very precarious.
A future which we all care
very deeply about.
Well, if you care,
you'll be there tonight.
You'll be there with Reverend Blunt.
And you'll take a stand.
Eli, hey.
- Eli.
- Who are these people?
Give them the thing.
If you've got the thing,
give it to them.
Get them to come.
Jesus.
Cary.
Listen.
You got to call me back soon.
Please.
Please, just call me.
Eli, where are you?
I'm at the Palm.
I put off the cops
till tomorrow afternoon.
You've got to get down here.
Elsa is taking over.
I can't stop her.
Hey, Elsa. You came.
How touching.
E., they bumped us
to the small room.
No, Romeo. No.
No. Forget it.
I want you to move these tables
out of here right now, Romeo.
Eli, you have fewer people.
It's fashion week.
I have "InStyle" magazine.
We are not huddling in that
bar mitzvah room upstairs
because of your tragic causes.
You used to work for me.
I trained you. I screwed you.
If you didn't scare me in the sack,
you ain't gonna scare me now.
That was a hundred years ago,
big shot.
You're a lot sadder now.
I am a lot tougher.
Tonight the Palm is mine.
I'm not asking.
I may be old, but I can still hurt.
Now, you think
about how I can hurt you.
Jesus.
Come on, Eli.
Romeo, I want you to move her
out of here.
And I want you to rearrange
this room.
Because it's not 70 people.
It's the whole goddamn world.
Eli, I have fashion week.
I have "InStyle."
I have Cary Launer!
He never shows.
Look what you are.
Look what you've become.
Do it, Romeo.
It's starting.
I know.
Uh, where's Jon Hendricks?
He's on his way.
Blunt is here.
I put him in the kitchen.
Why?
I didn't know what else to do.
He has half a dozen bodyguards.
Where's Cary?
He coming?
His doorman says he's still at home.
He ordered a Mr. Chow's
takeout duck salad,
an echinacea shake,
and some valerian drops.
Valerian drops. Jesus.
I know what that means.
- Just keep trying him.
- Yeah.
And this model kid.
You know. The one I invited.
Michael.
- Yeah. I put him next to you.
- Oh, good.
- Okay.
- Eli, wait a sec.
- I want to say something.
- Oh, not now.
No. Look.
I really have loved working for you.
I even sort of respect you.
But...
Always a "but."
Where you going?
You gonna be an agent?
No.
Back to Seattle.
I miss quaint and grunge and rain.
Don't we all.
That's a smart move, kid.
Come on.
I want to know
who's working the door.
I hate those flowers.
They look like they died last Easter.
George.
You're here.
Very good seeing you.
- Good seeing you, Gay.
- Hi.
Hey, Ross, how are you?
Ah. Welcome, Reverend.
They take care of you?
I have a long night.
A lot of stops.
- I know.
- Any fun people showing up?
Well, I hear Gandhi might stop by.
But that might only be a rumor.
Yeah, he was good in that movie.
But this ain't India.
Are they feeding you?
Anybody working?
Let's get some more shrimp.
- Sharansky's arrived.
- Yeah.
He's in a limo out front.
But he won't come in
until he knows he's safe.
Safe?
It's always about safety with him.
I'd like to know
what that man is so scared of.
I don't know.
Maybe he's afraid Mustafa here
is gonna ask him to dance.
Is there a problem?
This is Berger.
He does security for us.
No way can I let my man
in this place.
You can't?
I don't have enough exits
to make a clean retreat.
You are gonna be a lot safer
in there than you are in a car.
You can't sit in a limo all night.
Elliot, sweetheart, it's the Palm.
You're not walking into
a PLO training camp.
Think of Jimmy Carter.
Anwar Sadat. Camp David.
Elliot.
Let me help you.
I know Jimmy Carter.
Eli, believe me,
you're no Jimmy Carter.
We look alike.
Don't know why I like you, but I do.
You're the little Jew who could.
Don't worry about the guns.
They're just show.
They always love their guns.
- It's so good to see you.
- How are you?
Well, here we are.
Okay, gentlemen.
Here's the story.
We don't have much time.
So here's how it's gonna work.
I'm gonna introduce you.
Both of you.
That would hardly be appropriate.
You do not have the right stature.
- Stature?
- I agree, Mr. Sharansky.
I think it's more effective
if I speak first.
No. We never agreed on that.
Whatever the order, I go first.
"B," I need to be
out of here by 9:45.
And "C," Cary Launer introduces us.
Cary?
That's a deal-breaker.
He is planning on coming
but not necessarily speaking.
You never know with him.
Not talking?
Then Rev. Blunt is walking.
Nada con nada equals nada.
If Reverend Blunt leaves, I leave.
I'm not here to be the lone
schmuck on page 6 of the "Post."
You can say that again.
We can leave together.
Guys, I have almost 200
of the most important people
in this town out there,
opinion makers, to honor.
Just think about the cause, will you?
I don't appreciate
standing by the ovens.
The symbolism is unpleasant.
And it's hot.
And I need to see
Reverend Blunt's speech.
- You what?
- I'm sorry.
I need to know we're not
going to be humiliated.
Now, listen. Remember why
we're here, guys. Okay?
Why is it always about the past, huh?
What about today?
Where were you
when I was being thrown
in the back of a paddy wagon?
I was arrested because my people
are experiencing a holocaust.
Please, don't use that word with me!
What's tonight all about?
This INS thing.
They've been trying to send us
back to Africa for years.
You think you have a copyright
on tragedy?
Now, look, guys...
This has nothing to do with you.
While you were arrested, I was
quietly making phone calls
- on behalf of these gentlemen.
- We are on the same team.
- We are allies.
- He needs to see my speech.
You know what, Mr. Sharansky?
You can kiss my black ass.
That's Nig for "tokus."
Well, this is impossible.
I don't know why you thought
this could possibly work.
It can work.
Elliot, please.
- Are you gonna spin me?
- No.
Don't spin me.
I'm not.
Where you going?
Elliot, come on.
Reverend, did you have to do that?
Don't you realize
how important this thing is?
Why, Eli?
So you can have something good
you've attached yourself to?
You white people and your guilt.
The look you all get.
"We're sorry. We love you."
Eli, I like you.
But you do not speak
for all these people.
You're a nice man.
We'll go to a Knicks game
sometime, huh?
Elliot.
Okay. Thursday.
Wait.
Nice to see you.
- Eli.
- Michael.
I'm gonna get to meet
Cary Launer, right?
- Oh, sure, you are.
- You look great.
Thank you. You too.
Why don't you sit at the table?
Hey, Elliot.
You're not leaving, are you?
Hey, Cary.
- How are you?
- Well, I don't...
God, this is great, isn't it?
When did we see each other last?
That dull party.
- It was in Switzerland.
- It was a while ago.
I never heard so much whining
about the deutsche mark.
Now, come on.
You cannot leave.
- This is a charade.
- Yeah. But stick around.
We got a lot of catching up to do.
- We do?
- We never had our lunch.
By the way, I read your Op-Ed
piece in the "Times" last month.
It was terrific.
Caught a lot of flak about that.
I'm sure you did.
But you know what?
That's the name of the game.
You told it like it was.
That's why we're here, isn't it?
Uh, yes.
I gave your piece
to Arianna Huffington.
She just loved it.
But the trouble is, you can't win.
And I can.
But I need somebody smarter than me
to make me look as smart
as I do, and that's you.
That's my thought exactly, Cary.
We should have lunch.
And I should fill you in
on my thoughts.
Elliot, please, just do this.
Please.
Only on one condition.
I can't talk to that man back there.
And only if Cary acts as a buffer.
Cary, you're gonna have to
introduce Blunt and Elliot.
Oh, no, no.
Come on.
Cary, this is the last thing
I will ever ask of you.
E., will you look around?
Do you think this is important?
This is just another rat fuck.
I know that.
But I don't know what else to do.
God, you're dumber than me.
That would take a lot of work.
Listen.
I got enemies, Eli.
Some of them are right here
in this room.
I can't protect you.
Didn't she give you something for me?
You're such an actor.
Someone turns on a camera,
you just got to perform.
I don't know who's on that thing.
But I'm not giving it to anybody.
You think there's something
on that little thing?
- It's nothing.
- Yeah.
It's a movie.
If that's how you want to play,
I would get out of town.
Go find yourself someplace safe
where you can't get into any trouble.
There are people moving around this
I don't even know about.
The big three.
Right this way.
Cary! Over here!
Mr. Launer, big smile!
Hey, Eli.
Oh, not now.
Please.
We're gonna do a thing
about Jilli Hopper's last night.
Quite a performer.
I hear that she kept a little
black book or something.
- I'm sure.
- You know who was in it?
Mayor Conlin.
Mr. Family Values.
I'm sure.
They're all in there.
Cardinal O'Connor.
Pat Robertson. Jerry Falwell.
She claims to have fucked them all.
Eli. We've met before.
I'm Sarah Niles.
You came to my book party
at Elaine's.
I was just gonna...
Oh, this is my boyfriend.
Detective Jack Pollan.
He wanted to meet you.
Listen, Eli.
It's a small department.
Word's out that you're saying
you saw something.
Maybe if you saw
someone do something,
perhaps they saw you, too.
Yeah.
I don't understand.
Are you giving me advice
or something?
It's like "The Cat in the Hat."
You try to fix the mess,
but you make it worse.
Then you call in more cats.
The wrong cats.
It's life, you know?
Yeah.
You know, I got to go.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Oscar-winner Cary Launer.
Thank you.
This is good.
This is very good.
I want to say a couple of things
about how important tonight is.
And how important it is
that we say thank you
to the man who put it
all together, Eli Wurman.
A guy who believes in
the history of the coalition
and a very silent guy.
A guy who knows how to
make things happen.
A long time ago, there was
a movement in this city.
People came together to be heard.
Now, there are two men who,
in very different ways,
have never stopped marching
for freedom
and fighting for the cause.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you
the Reverend Lyle Blunt
and Elliot Sharansky.
Hey, E.
I met Cary Launer.
Jeez.
And you. You are the man.
They love you upstairs.
Cary Launer.
Holy shit.
He is so fucking cool.
So fucking cool.
He's a god.
He is a god.
God of death.
Cary.
Hey, thanks so much
for bringing me here tonight.
Oh. Yeah.
You okay?
This benefit.
It's so much goddamn work.
For what?
You know?
Yeah.
The worst thing in this world,
Michael, is to know too much.
You want to try and stay na?? Ve.
It's much better.
Come on.
? Pack up my care and woe?
? Here I go?
? Swingin' low?
? Bye-bye, blackbird?
Hi! Eli.
Fantastic night.
I'll never forget it.
Listen, next Saturday
I'm having the opening...
Eli, it's great.
Do you think you could get Cary
for the Lincoln Center gala?
Hey, it's terrific, Eli.
Listen, we're having
this human-rights-march dinner.
? No one Here can ever try
to understand me?
? And wHat Hard-luck stories
tHey all Hand me?
You can make a comeback, bubby.
? Make my bed
and ligHt my ligHt?
? I'll arrive late tonight?
? Blackbird, bye-bye-bye?
? Bye-bye, bye-bye?
? Bye-bye?
Hey, E.
Look.
Victoria's over there
waiting for you.
Hey.
Oh, I'm so glad you came.
Me too.
Let's get out of this madhouse.
I'm so sorry.
- No.
- I really am.
I'm sorry.
Nobody has anything
to be sorry about.
Well...
We're still kids, Eli.
Nobody knows what to do
or how to do it.
It's all just lurching.
- You know?
- Yeah, I guess.
It's working.
Is it?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
I guess it is.
And yet, darling, you look so sad.
Well, no.
I'm not sad.
I'm happy.
Can't you tell?
Oh.
You're gonna be okay.
You know that?
Okay.
Why don't we just...
Lurch on out of here
while we still can?
? Here I go?
? Blackbird?
? Bye-bye?
? Bye-bye?
I don't know.
It's changed, I think, this city.
You feeling sorry for yourself?
That's a new color for you.
No.
I'm just...
I don't know. Maybe I just
want to leave the party.
Do you really mean that?
E., are you ready?
I'll tell you the truth.
I don't think I have any more
days like today left in me.
I just don't.
So, you go to bed early
down there in Virginia?
I mean, the cows and the trees
and all them fresh eggs.
You can have the barn to yourself.
The barn, huh?
Yes.
It's very ascetic.
And monastic.
Yeah, sort of safe distance
from the main house, that it?
Eli, we don't have to...
There are no conditions here.
I know.
I know.
It's just friendship.
Yeah.
But you could come in
for all your meals.
I'll cook.
And there's reading.
Silence.
Any phones in the barn?
No, but I'll put one in.
No, don't.
Ever.
You know...
I got to pack some stuff.
If you'll wait for me,
we can take the noon train.
Success.
Finally.
Yeah.
- Okay.
- Okay.
Okay.
Vicki.
Hey, man, that hurt!
Here you go.
Yeah.
Yes, yes.
Jesus.
Elmwood is really bouncing back
from a period of neglect and decay.
And much of it can be traced
directly back to the 1930s,
when the automobile
started taking over.
In 1936, Elmwood Avenue
was widened...
Everybody, thank you for being there.
- I'm Bill Press.
- I'm Tucker Carlson.
Welcome to our special
Groundhog's Day...
Scattered showers.
Thunderstorms tomorrow.
An ugly morning front...
Thank you very much, everybody.
How you doing, huh?
Thank you. Okay.
Thank you very much, everybody.
That was some event
we went to last night.
Our old great friend Eli Wurman,
one of the great publicists,
put together a fantastic night.
Everybody was there.
Lots of celebrities.
And we were there, too.
- Eli put it all together.
- He has really made a mark.
Remember he came to the house
for the Super Bowl game?
He made some chili for us.
No, it wasn't the Super Bowl.
It was the World Series.
It was curry, and I made it.
Oh, God.
Oh, sorry. But seriously.
Last night, wonderful.
Cary Launer was there.
He said he's gonna have
an important announcement soon.
We're giving away a cruise
of the Caribbean
on the Norwegian Cruise Line.
So don't go away.
All right.
What do we have today?
We have Sarah Jessica Parker.
Plus Nathan Lane.
Emeril Lagasse is going to
show us how to make a jambalaya.
And also that cute Carson Daly.
All the kids love him.