Oh, I'm sorry.
It's so hot in here...
and I can't figure
this stupid thing out.
I signed the papers.
Wow.
How are you feeling?
Terrible.
Francis was there.
Obviously, he was there.
It was really hard
to see him.
And he signed so fast.
I at least pretended to look things over
one last time.
He sounds terrified
to me...
It's going to
take a while.
I mean,
nine years, Rafi.
You can't just walk away
from that kind of time.
The crazy thing is...
I'm out of this marriage,
what, five minutes...
and all of a sudden
I just...
I find myself
thinking about...
a baby.
Why now?
And why didn't I think about
this when I was married?
Well, I mean, you know...
on a certain level,
you knew this was not the right man.
So you were protecting yourself
in that way.
That was a good thing.
Oh, Rafi,
you're coming alive again.
You know, you just want
all the things...
that you had to forget
that you could have.
That's a very good place
to move into.
And the baby thing
will happen...
when it's the right time.
But just focus on the now.
For now.
Hey, Dave, it's Morris...
Listen, I got a favor
to ask you.
I went out with this girl
the other night.
And she told me never to call her again.
You know how that goes.
So I'm gonna need you
to come with me this time.
Don't freak out, all right?
I don't know how to get to Bay Ridge.
I'm not sure.
Bye.
I don't understand
why I have to be a part of this.
You have
an incurable sickness.
It's okay, though.
I understand.
But why am I
being involved?
- How are you being involved?
- Because I'm in the car.
I'm going to be a witness to this.
That makes me an accessory.
- What, like a handbag?
- Morris.
So who's it this time?
You know what? Don't...
I don't wanna know. Don't tell me.
Her father's probably in
waste management or something.
What I would like to know is why
no girl will go out with you twice.
One date, it's over.
What do you do? What do you say?
You know,
it's a mystery to me, too.
Are you a hermaphrodite?
Do you have hantavirus?
This is it. Come on.
All right,
just make this quick.
I gotta meet Michelle
at the movies a little later.
- Michelle? God.
- Just make it quick.
- Hi.
- What the hell are you doing here?
I told you I never wanted
to see you again.
I just want to talk.
Just come out here
and let's talk.
I can't believe
you came to my house.
- You have no respect for women.
- I don't, I'm sorry.
You hurt my feelings, okay,
you piece of shit.
- Okay. Okay.
- I can't believe you're here.
Okay? Okay?
- Mikey!
- Okay, I'm gonna go.
Joey, come out here!
- Mikey! Joey! Come out here! Mikey? Joey?
- Go! Get in the car! Get in the car!
Go, go, go!
Oh, shit!
It's not funny.
- Meeting Michelle.
- Yeah.
What are you going to see,
Beaches?
You're the wind
beneath my wings, Mo.
Hey, did you ever know
you were my hero?
- Have fun.
- All right, man.
Dave.
Randall.
Ah, right, I remember your name.
How you doing?
Hi.
- What's going on?
- Nothing much.
This is my friend Katherine
and this is my friend Rafi.
Hi.
Hi.
So what are you
doing here?
- Well, I thought I'd see a movie.
- Right.
Why? Are you embarrassed
to be seen with me?
- What?
- It's okay. Just tell me.
My God, this kid is funny.
Where did you get him?
Well, he works at Travelart
and we met that client through this...
Hey.
Hey.
- Randall.
- I'm sorry.
- Hi. Michelle.
- Michelle.
You have your tickets yet?
No, we're gonna get tickets.
- Are you seeing this?
- Yeah.
- You are?
- Yeah.
That's great. We're...
- I'll see you in there.
- Okay, good. We'll be in...
Get in the bun.
Get in the bun.
It's locked.
What?
The door. It won't open.
So, does this
happen to you a lot?
Actually, not often enough.
So what are we gonna do?
Wait till somebody comes out.
Right.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
So, how long
have you guys been dating?
- Couple of weeks.
- We're not dating.
Okay. Next question.
I mean, we only went out twice
before this.
- Do you consider that dating?
- I guess I did.
I'm sorry.
I mean, to me,
dating sounds more serious.
Like you've already been
going out for a couple of months, like...
Maybe you don't
live together...
but you definitely stay over
a couple of nights a week.
You don't worry about
who paid for the last meal anymore.
You've seen each other pee,
you know?
More serious kind of stuff.
Then what do you call this?
Well, that's it.
There are officially
no cute boys left here.
All right.
It's so nice to get out.
It was nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you, too.
Dave. Very nice to see you.
Good night.
Bye. Nice to meet you.
One, two, three, four.
Just fucking call her.
Hello.
Hello?
-Hello?
- Hi. It's Dave...
Bloomberg.
Did you just call me?
Yes.
We get disconnected?
No.
Did you hang up?
Uh-huh.
They say it's better
to lie sometimes...
but I can't really do that
when I'm this nervous.
I think I need to be
in a better place.
I like it better this way.
I've been around enough lying to say so.
You had a lot of liars
in your life, huh?
- What?
- Shit.
Would you like to go out
to dinner with me tomorrow?
David, I'm making a sandwich.
Do you want one?
No, I'm fine!
- Who's that?
- That's my roommates.
So, do you want
to have dinner?
- Yes.
- Yeah?
I'll call you tomorrow.
Okay.
Okay.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Okay, Grandma.
So, what kind of sandwich
are we talking about?
Hi, I'm here to see
Rafi Gardet. My name's Dave.
Raphael. It's Damien.
Yeah. There's a...
It's Dave.
Dave here to see you.
Okay.
She'll be right down.
Bubbles here, I like that.
It's a good touch.
Is that wool?
Looks itchy. Is it itchy?
I think it's the biggest
contradiction in the world.
Jews eat carp, okay?
Who eats carp?
They don't serve it in restaurants.
Have you ever seen carp
on a menu in your life?
Please, answer me honestly.
- No.
- No. You know why?
Because it's disgusting.
But for all this
terrible food...
you've never seen a people
so obsessed with it in your life.
It's a remnant.
I'll bet every immigrant group...
that was displaced by World War II
puts a lot of emphasis on food.
I mean, it was scarce.
Carp is cheap, right?
It was probably a staple of their diet.
What is this, the History Channel?
You trying to kill this for me?
- Come on.
- Sorry. Fine, go ahead.
Okay,
so my friend Morris...
So I think you're gonna love this place.
It's beautiful.
No one's ever there.
- Can I see some ID?
- Sure.
- Love when that happens.
- Yeah.
I wish
I still got carded.
- Excuse me, Dave.
- Yes.
Quick question for you.
How old are you?
Actually, I don't speak Vietnamese.
Why do you ask?
- Are you being evasive?
- I am trying.
You know,
I don't tell my age.
I think people get way
too caught up with the number.
I'm 37. Did you know that?
You know, I hadn't really
thought about it.
Sure you hadn't.
Look, I know
you're a lot younger than me.
I'd just like to know,
you know, how much.
Okay, let me guess.
- Twenty-nine.
- No.
Really? Older?
- You don't look 30 to me.
- Thanks.
I'm 23.
No, you're not.
I don't believe you.
Let me see the license.
Oh, my God. You're a child.
Taxi!
I have T-shirts older than you.
- They let me drive, okay?
- Yeah, with a parent in the car.
How come you seem
so much older to me?
I don't know.
I don't know if I can do this.
Come on.
- Can you hold this?
- Sure.
- Are we gonna get in trouble?
- I hope so.
This place is amazing.
I can't believe
I've walked by this for 15 years...
and I didn't know
it was here.
Let's have it.
What?
How did you know?
Okay. His name is David...
and he's really, really nice.
I mean, sweet.
And I met him a few days ago
and he asked me out on a date.
And we went out to dinner...
and we kissed.
I like beer.
- Good.
- I mean, no, I...
I never used to. I had to learn,
'cause nobody in my family drinks.
You're lucky,
'cause everyone in my family drinks.
No, I mean, my family,
they don't drink anything.
It's like
Salt Lake City.
They'll have maybe a sip of wine
every Friday night, on the Sabbath.
That's it, though,
and it's Manischewitz.
I've never had that.
You like High-C?
'Cause my mom, she likes to keep
the wine in the fridge...
and we'll still be drinking it
three months later.
- A good chardonnay can last...
- Yeah. It's red.
That's not good.
- Hey, by the way. Things to avoid.
- Okay.
Beginning sentences with,
"My mom."
Right.
I'm all over it.
However old you are,
I have to say...
I haven't had this much fun
in a really long time.
I'm glad I met you.
I gotta tell you...
you're making me nervous
in a way I'm not really familiar with.
My God, Lisa, what am I doing?
I only got divorced last week.
Easy, easy. It's okay.
You didn't tattoo his name
on your toochis, did you?
Do you want to
save some of that for later?
What? What is it?
He's...
- He's only 27.
- And?
What do you mean, "and"?
I mean, that's 10 years different.
He could be my brother.
If he were one year younger,
he could be your brother.
Aren't you embarrassed for me?
I mean...
this just smells of
"pool boy at Sandals Resort."
Oh, it's fine.
It might even do you some good...
if you know what I mean.
- Lisa!
- What?
There's nothing to be ashamed of.
You're both at your sexual peak.
So you approve?
Yes. Unequivocally.
Yes, this is good.
But it can't really go anywhere.
You know, I mean, he's...
He's so young.
Yeah, but it's a little early
to be worrying about that.
And besides, you're not looking to
get married next week, right?
Enjoy your life
a little bit.
You deserve this.
Twenty-seven.
Hell, I deserve this!
No, she's not Jewish.
Mom, I'm not trying
to kill you.
Yes, I want you to be alive
to see your grandchildren.
Your Jewish grandchildren,
Mom.
No, I didn't know that
you wanted to be buried in Israel.
Mom, I'm not gonna talk about this
over the phone right now, okay?
I'll see you tomorrow.
I love you, too. Bye.
Hey, Dave.
Hi, D.
Where's Mom?
I told you
to hang it up, Dinah!
Hey, guys.
You left the bathroom light on
this morning.
Jeff Rosenberg's son
got engaged yesterday.
To a speech therapist.
- Hey, boychik.
- Hi, Dad.
We have to talk about
our last phone conversation.
Mom.
It's good to see you, too.
- I'm not kidding around.
- Okay, I can...
I can just tell
that this is gonna be...
some sort of disciplinary action,
not a talk.
All right. We'll be sure
to make it a talk, then.
Now can you help your sister
set the table, please?
Sure.
And take the wine
out of the fridge.
- Has he called yet?
- The next night.
- Nice.
- I know. I'm not used to this.
Did you guys make a plan
to go out again?
He wanted to have dinner
with me tomorrow night.
But I have a flight
early Sunday morning.
When I told him
I had to go to Paris, he goes:
"That's a bit drastic
for a bad date.
"Do you really need
to leave the country?"
- This kid's funny.
- Please don't use that word.
Right, sorry.
He's humorous.
What are you doing?
Drinking.
He's having Scotch.
Mom, I'm 23. It's fine.
What, what, what?
Tomorrow, gonna go to shul,
gonna pray that everybody...
is gonna have a happy...
Dinah, you know,
since you told me about computers...
- Mom, let him finish.
- He's finished.
I've become so...
Then why do you
have to do this?
There are so many other women
that you could go out with.
And I've encouraged you
to branch out...
in any other way that you like,
but just not this.
Why do you have to do this?
What do you mean,
"do this"?
Do what?
Incur the wrath of God?
Why are you getting yourself
into trouble?
I'm not getting married, Mom.
I'm just seeing what's out there.
You make it out like we live in
the Warsaw ghetto.
It's the Upper West Side.
We're strong in numbers here.
So you're still planning on
marrying someone Jewish?
Yes. Sure. Okay?
But then I don't understand
why you need to go down this road.
You may end up
getting hurt for nothing.
Or worse, hurting her.
Don't you value
your culture and your history?
Well, it's not one
or the other, Mom.
But if you're smart enough
to know...
that it makes sense to marry someone
from the same background...
and it does, any of the studies
will show you that...
as far as
the divorce rates go.
Then you should be
smart enough to know...
not to start something
where nothing can come of it.
You're only going
to make a mess.
I can't even believe
what you're saying.
Do you hear
what you're saying?
- What?
- You're a therapist.
You would never tell that
to a patient.
Not true, not true.
I encourage my patients
to have relationships...
within their respective faiths.
It's easier.
I encourage them to go to mosque,
or church, or whatever.
I think religion is...
paramount in a person's life.
Okay, well, yes...
but encouraging them
is different from discouraging them.
And I know that
you draw the line there.
Would you tell one of your patients
not to date someone...
that they don't think
they're gonna marry...
Oh, quit asking me
what I tell my patients.
They're not my children.
How old is she?
- She's 27.
- What?
She's four years
older than you? Oh, David.
Drop it now.
It's only going to end badly.
Maybe if you met her,
you might think...
I'm not going to meet her.
Oh, my God.
Are you out of your mind?
Mom, do you...
You sound like
an after school special.
Don't do this.
I'm doing it.
On your own then.
Hey, what's up, man?
Cool.
Do you need anything or...
No?
- Go on up. She's expecting you.
- Thank you. Give me...
Five? Thumbs up?
Smile? No?
We'll get there.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Come on in.
- Thanks for the soup.
- Yeah.
- It's chicken noodle.
- It's hot.
Wow.
This place is huge.
I'm not even going to ask
what you pay.
I don't want to know.
It's Rothko.
I've never seen this one before.
What year is this?
It's probably my single
favorite piece of art.
Yeah, I love how
he never titled any of his work.
It's beautiful. Luminous.
What is this?
Sentimental Mood.
- You never heard Coltrane before?
- No.
- What? Am I in trouble now?
- No.
No, it's just...
He's a pretty famous
jazz musician.
Oh. So, is this that Negro music
that everybody's talking about?
'Cause I had no idea.
I have to wake up
in five hours.
Do you want me to go?
Take off your sweater.
Wait.
Does this involve dancing?
'Cause my corns,
they've been killing me and...
Take it off.
It's coming with me.
All right.
I really like her.
She's only been gone two days.
She comes back tomorrow.
I miss her already.
I never felt this before.
It's just 'cause you haven't
slept with her yet.
No, that's definitely
not it.
I really like her, man.
I don't know, I mean...
- I think I could love her.
- What?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait, what was I saying?
I don't know, man. There is
something about this girl...
Like, you know that feeling
that you get...
when you're in a room
with someone...
and even though
you may not know them...
or understand them
completely...
you just... you just know that you're in
the presence of greatness? You know?
Yeah, like when you come
to my apartment.
And she old, man,
she a time-fighter.
She's so fine, bro.
I don't know.
I just feel like it's gonna end badly,
I do.
- You sound like my mother.
- Yeah.
Hey, Morris! All right!
What the hell
am I listening to you for?
I'm in a bakery
shopping for a pie...
so you can put it
in some girl's face...
who wouldn't let you
get down her pants.
- When was the cream pie made?
- Today.
- Today?
- Yeah.
- Nice. I'll take that one.
- Awesome.
So what's with Dave?
Is he really serious
about this girl, or what?
I don't know.
So what is she?
Catholic? Episcopalian?
I didn't ask.
Would you prefer one denomination
over another...
as far as
the love of Christ goes?
- Your father's gonna flip.
- Yeah.
And it's too bad your mom isn't
around for this.
It would have gone over
real big with her, too.
So, what are we gonna do?
I don't know.
Give me this.
Have you ever had ikura
with quail egg?
No. What is that?
I swear it's like having sex.
- That's a bold claim.
- You want to try it?
How am I gonna say no now?
- That's amazing.
- I know.
What?
So, how was your trip?
- Who cares?
- Okay.
Well, this sounds
really good.
That's what I'm hearing.
It was amazing.
He's really very sweet.
I didn't have an orgasm,
though.
Completely normal.
There are
so many trust issues there.
You just have to
give it time.
I'm willing to do the work.
God damn it.
Do you still worry
about his age?
Definitely.
I mean, I was thinking last night,
there are some countries...
where I could get
arrested for this. I mean, 23?
I thought
you said he was 27.
Did I?
I did.
I'm sorry.
I lied to you about that.
Why do you think you lied?
I was...
I mean,
I am embarrassed by his age.
I mean, he's just so young.
What does he do?
He's an artist.
I'm not an artist.
I thought you said
you were a painter.
No. I said I like to paint.
But it's a hobby.
I mean, you have to work, too.
He doesn't call himself that,
but that's what he is.
He has some issue with it.
His family doesn't support him
in his work at all.
Hmm.
Where does he live?
Grand Street.
Lower East Side.
I haven't been there yet.
He has roommates,
and so I'm not exactly running over.
Okay.
Our time is up.
And I will see you on...
On Monday.
Of course.
Are you okay?
Yes. No.
Yes. I mean, I'm fine,
because I have to be somewhere.
- Okay. Bye.
- Bye.
Shit, shit, shit...
shit, shit, shit, shit.
Oh, shit.
So what the hell am I supposed
to do now, end treatment?
Keep going?
Bring them in
for a couple session?
Well, if this doesn't
go anywhere...
And I really
don't think it will.
Then you'll be relieved
you stayed with her now.
If you end her treatment...
and they break up
after two weeks...
you will not have
served her best interests.
So what are you saying?
That I should keep treating her?
If you think
it's just a fling, yes.
But that sounds crazy.
Is that even ethical?
Your job is to help her.
That's your ethical boundary.
Okay.
Forgetting all the professional implications
of the moment...
how are you feeling?
I'm a wreck.
I'm a wreck.
Rita, she's not even Jewish.
If she were Jewish...
would you feel better about
him dating a 37-year-old divorce?
Where are we going?
I just gotta stop by work
for a second.
- What's up, Gil?
- Hey, what's up, Dave?
How you doing, man?
All right.
- Did you set it up?
- Oh, yeah.
- This is Rafi.
- Hi.
- Pleasure.
- Gil.
Oh, my God. This is amazing.
Come here.
Something else I want to show you.
You've gotta be kidding me.
Go, go, go!
Quit ignoring me!
Come on, Dave, I'm open.
Get it in there!
Foul, man! Foul!
Stay off me. Stay off me.
I've told you twice now.
You've been warned.
Hey.
It's incredible.
It's amazing.
I'm sorry,
your bra is showing.
Is it missing a button there?
- No.
- No. That's the way it is.
You were so right
about Jewish men.
I mean, so attentive.
But, I mean, of course you know.
You're married to one.
Yes, but he has ADD.
I just can't get over it.
I mean...
I feel a little awkward
telling you this.
But I can't tell anyone else.
This is so...
We have had sex on every surface
of my apartment.
I mean,
I haven't had much sleep.
But he's just so eager
to please me...
and I feel the same way
about him.
He makes me
want to do things...
I understand.
...that I've never
wanted to do before.
I got it.
You're gonna laugh...
but he didn't actually know
where the clitoris was.
Really?
- Did you show him?
- Of course.
I mean,
he's so uninhibited.
Just happy to learn.
He hasn't had much experience.
He's only been with two other women.
What?
He's had sex with two other women?
Yes. Can you believe
that's it?
Now I know why men go after
younger women.
There's something to it.
His youth, his body...
his naivet?..
his goddamn eagerness.
I mean...
Isn't this great?
Yeah. It's amazing.
Listen.
I just have to say this
because I'm too embarrassed
to tell anyone else.
His penis...
is so beautiful, I just...
want to knit it a hat.
Did you ever think...
that I would be
this satisfied, I mean, sexually.
Not like this.
Are you using protection?
Oh, of course. He brought it up.
He's very responsible.
Oh, that's very good.
- Is he neat?
- What?
Does he pick up after himself?
Does he make the bed in the morning?
Does he ask
before he uses the phone?
Yes. Why?
Well, you can tell a lot
about a man from those things.
Yeah, he's very neat.
I mean, he does have
some unusual habits, though.
Hey, I'm not trying
to freak you out here...
but these Q-Tips are amazing.
Guess what?
You're freaking me out.
What are you talking about?
We never had these growing up.
I saw them in my Mom's bathroom,
but we never used them.
How'd you clean your ears?
Didn't.
Just towel-dried them, I guess.
- Let me see the Q-Tip.
- No.
You have to
get out of here.
What kind of mother doesn't teach their child
how to clean their ears?
Pediatricians say...
that it is unhealthy
for children to use them...
because it can damage
the eardrum.
And it has been shown
that a small amount of wax...
in the inner canal
helps protect against larger debris.
- I didn't know that.
- Well...
Sorry.
I'm sorry.
Tell me what...
what it is that you're trying to say.
I'm just worried about
where this is going.
You know, I want to give
all of myself. Just let it go.
It's so tempting.
I mean,
it's all he wants from me.
Who wouldn't want all of you, Rafi?
You are an amazing woman.
But then I think...
I mean, he's just too young
to handle the responsibility. I...
I'm scared
to put myself out like that.
That's a very mature
line of thought.
I'm sure
his intentions are pure...
but he doesn't sound like...
he knows exactly what it is
he's getting into.
Do you think
I should just cut it off right now?
I'm not going to answer that.
Look, I don't want you to get
the wrong idea about my family.
Sensitive subject?
Maybe.
All right, look.
I've been having trouble
with my mom concerning you.
- Concerning me?
- Yeah.
It's just... I wanted her
to meet you and she said no.
Well, that's sweet,
but don't you think...
it's a little early
to be introducing me to your mother?
- She said no? Why?
- I...
Look, she has a problem
with you not being Jewish.
- She won't meet me?
- No.
Why do you think I'm so upset?
We're not even speaking right now.
Well, I don't understand.
I thought you said she was a therapist.
I know.
How do you think I feel?
Didn't she meet
the black girl you dated?
No way.
No, my mother doesn't even
know about that.
That was my bubi.
My dad's mom.
- David, love.
- Hey, bubi.
I wanted you to meet
my girlfriend, Radjina.
Radjina, this is my bubi.
Hi.
Is she black?
It's really not
that funny, okay?
My bubi died
three weeks later.
And I know
she didn't tell anybody about Radjina...
but her reaction
and her subsequent death...
let me know it might be
a good idea to keep that one quiet.
I swear, I think she went in
the house after that...
and just hit herself
over the head with the frying pan.
I mean, that's the image I get
whenever I'm doing something wrong.
Just her, like,
whacking away with the skillet.
I can say this much.
Age aside...
he gives me
more of what I really need...
than anyone else ever has.
Real things.
Things I never got.
It makes it hard
to harp on age...
or religion or anything,
because...
I'm just happy.
Yeah.
What's wrong, David?
- I lost my job.
- I'm sorry.
Did you hear Josh Friedman
got engaged to a chef?
Yes, I heard.
Truffle matzo balls. Amazing.
You better tell him
about the Kushners, Sam.
We're trading apartments with the Kushners,
starting August 1st.
In Miami?
You have to find someplace else to live
while we're gone.
Oh, come on. Not now.
This is the worst possible time.
And who goes to Miami
in August?
That's what I said.
Come on.
What are you talking about?
It's beautiful
this time of year.
Grandpa, it's a sauna down there
and it rains every single afternoon.
The Kushners are taking you
for a ride.
- I told you, Sam.
- Oh, what does he know?
It's a condominium.
We're going.
What?
Condominium means no rain?
Do you know
where Raphael Gardet is?
My dad's got this great place
in Wainscott.
There's a limo waiting,
so you won't have to take the Jitney.
Excuse me.
Do you know where Raphael Gardet is?
- Who are you?
- I'm Dave.
Hi, Dave.
Are you one of
the models?
No. Are you the hairdresser?
- Excuse me?
- I think you heard me.
Diana, eyes to me.
That's great.
Are you the hairdresser?
That was good.
I really enjoyed that.
I just asked him simply,
"Do you know where Raphael Gardet is?"
And he gives me all this attitude
like I'm some...
Whatever. Jesus, Dave.
It's so uncool.
- The guy's a schmuck.
- Schmuck?
It's who I work for.
Who are you?
What are you thinking?
I got cut to
one day a week at work.
Then I find out I gotta be
out of my place on Monday.
I'm gonna be broke
in a month.
But I'm sorry, okay?
I am sorry.
Okay, let's do something.
It's Friday night.
What do you want to do?
Start observing
the Sabbath or something?
No.
I wanna know what
a normal Friday night was like for you...
before you met me.
I mean, you didn't sit
around fireplaces in The Village...
drinking merlot, did you?
Actually, we stood around trash-can fires
in the Bowery drinking 40s.
- Come on.
- What?
I wanna know
what you did. Show me.
- Are you sure?
- Yeah.
Let's go to your place.
We never go to your place.
I got roommates, Rafi.
Rafi...
I wanna see
your paintings.
You're not missing much.
Convenient and weak.
I wanna go.
I wanna go right now.
I want to see where you sleep
when you're not in my bed.
This is nice.
Kitchen.
- Very grown-up.
- Yeah.
- David?
- Yeah.
Who are your roommates?
Is that you, David?
Yes.
Go to sleep, Grandma.
Come on. Give me a break.
It's embarrassing enough, all right?
- Where's the bathroom?
- Bathroom's right there.
Did you eat?
Yes, I ate. Good night.
What are you doing?
Stashing all your pornos?
Yeah, and all my posters
had to come down, too.
- Why are they all facing away?
- I don't know.
Who wants to look
at my paintings all day?
We have to talk...
about this thing you have
with your art.
I mean, it's weird.
It's like you think
it's a sin or something.
Bubi?
I've decided
I'm gonna be an artist.
Dave.
You're really good.
This is what you
should be doing.
You've got to keep painting.
Yeah?
It's not a life.
Says who?
You're crazy.
You're lucky. I'm just
paving the way for you.
This is the curse
of the eldest child.
When it's all over,
you'll be able to bring home Jay-Z.
- Are you and Mom talking?
- Not really.
She's just a different person
these days.
What are you doing?
I'm just dropping off some clothes.
You're not going to
stay here?
I'm going to
Morris' place.
To tell you the truth,
I didn't even think you'd want me here.
Don't be melodramatic.
This is your home.
We're your family.
Even if you
did bring home Jay-D.
It's Jay-Z, Mom.
Whatever.
Jay-B, Jay-D...
I have a patient coming,
so be careful when you leave.
Oh, I'm so sorry
to keep you waiting.
Did I knock?
Am I late?
I feel like
I'm late.
- But no.
- No.
Sit, sit, sit.
What is that?
A gun?
No, it's a yoga mat.
- He's moving in with me.
- What?
I thought you said...
Weren't you just saying...
that he couldn't provide you
with the things that you needed?
I'm still unsure.
But I think
I should just give it a shot.
I mean, you always say,
"Just get messy in life.
"At least you know you're living."
Right?
Besides, if he can't give me
what I need...
then I'll find out sooner
if he's living with me.
- And he has nowhere to go.
- He said that?
His best friend
has a studio.
He's not getting along with his mother,
so he can't go home.
She hates me, by the way.
Did I tell you that?
No. You hadn't mentioned it.
Yes, it's this
whole other thing...
that I'm trying
not to even think about.
They say the children of psychoanalysts
are the most screwed up of all.
Yes, so I had heard that.
So he's moving in.
I think it'll be fun.
I mean that's what you said
to do with this, right?
I mean, just have fun.
That's right.
That's right.
What are you
looking at?
I... I forgot,
I have a book...
A book...
A book I wanted to show you.
Thought it might be...
"Lesbians
and the Kabbalah...
"A Match Made in Heaven."
Wrong book.
Wrong book. Wrong...
Oh, my.
Oh, well, never mind.
Forget it.
I'm sorry.
I am so late.
I can't help it
if you parade around...
fulfilling every working-girl
fantasy I've ever had.
You should wear a garbage bag
till you get to the elevator.
Hey, are we still going
to the Hamptons this Friday?
Yeah. See you.
Great.
Village People weekend.
You'll be fine.
I've been grooming you
for this moment.
A Bette Davis marathon
on the Turner Classic Network hardly qualifies.
Hey, you guys,
they're here. Come on.
- Hi. How are you?
- Hey, Jason.
You look great.
You do, too.
- Dave, this is Jason.
- Hi.
Hi. We've heard
all about you.
Hi.
Raphael!
- Hello.
- Hello.
Hi, it's so good
to see you again.
- How are you?
- I'm good.
- How was the drive?
- It was good.
- Good.
- Brilliant.
- Palmer, this is Dave.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- Great. How are you doing?
- Great.
- Yeah?
Is he okay? Or...
Ignore him. He's just jealous
he didn't get into your pants first.
Hey, what's up?
Oh, my God!
I am so sorry.
Alsayste,
you junkie!
It's so he won't bark.
Are you okay?
Yeah.
I think I'm blind.
Oh, no.
Gotta call the pediatrician.
All right, come on.
That stings.
That's terrible.
This place is amazing.
I mean, everything.
Every room is perfect.
Look at this.
Even the beds are awesome.
We're gonna have
vacation sex tonight.
What's vacation sex,
Dave?
I don't know,
but you're gonna get it, girl.
Look at this, even the breeze
coming through here.
This is perfect.
Is it like this
for all rich people?
No, just gay rich people.
- You're gonna get it.
- Oh, yeah?
I'm gonna give it to you.
Vacation sex, Dave?
Please. You are the only registered
gay Republican in New York.
It's just a tax thing.
I'm to the left
on every other issue.
I still say the Democrats need
their own show pushing their own agenda.
No one would watch.
I mean, there's no blood.
Hey, I'd watch that show.
People would much rather watch
some liberal be humiliated...
on The O'Reilly Factor.
You should go on, Jason,
and thoroughly humiliate the man.
Sure, he'd love me.
Alsayste? Where is he?
I'll get him.
Fiddler on a hot tin roof.
And so young. Have you carded him?
Yes, unfortunately, I have.
I think he's great. Smart and sweet.
Just needs a little seasoning.
Yeah, I think he's...
You don't get to say.
You're totally infatuated with him.
Maybe, but I'm still worried
about you.
He is so young and you're
obviously falling for him.
- So what? Fall.
- What is wrong with you?
You look 10 years younger.
I've never seen you this happy.
I'm just saying,
you want a baby...
and he is in no position
to give you that.
- You're on the clock, Rafi.
- Thanks, Randall. That's sweet.
Plus, he has
this weird relationship with his mother...
who wants him to marry
someone named Rivkah or Devorah.
Randall, who asked you?
Besides, I think
it's interesting...
that you call
their relationship weird...
when all it is, is close.
We should all be so lucky.
Besides, your mother still thinks
you're straight, for Christ's sakes.
So, Dave, do you care
if your kids are Jewish?
I care if they're happy.
Good answer.
So, what's up
with your friends?
This whole weekend felt
like a long audition.
- They're just worried about me.
- Worried about what?
How old you are,
I mean...
my wanting to have a child
at some point.
Your moving in.
And I'm just a little nervous.
That's all.
You know how it is in New York.
Your apartment's all you have.
A few hundred square feet
you can call your own.
The work's strong, I mean,
it's realistic portraits...
and he's only 23,
I was amazed.
Sounds great.
I'd really like to take a look at his work.
- Is he here?
- Yes, he is.
- Great.
- He'd love that.
- Let me go find him.
- Okay.
I want you to see this.
Come here.
Raphael.
- How are you, honey?
- How you doing?
- Good to see you.
- Nice to see you.
Have you met
my friend Ann?
Hi.
Nice to meet you.
I've got my hands full.
You sure do.
Gosh, she's beautiful.
Thank you.
- What's her name?
- Ella.
You're so sweet.
- How old is she?
- She's one.
- Oh, my goodness.
- Yeah, she's a big girl.
Do you have
any children?
No, I don't have
any children.
She's just started walking.
She's holding onto the railing...
Oh, she's so sweet.
Hey, baby.
Hey.
Do you know you have over
500 channels on this thing?
I watched the Malaysian
Grand Prix today.
Really? That's amazing.
Have you left the apartment
since this morning?
No. Why?
He sits around all day
in my apartment.
I have zero privacy
when I go home.
This does not sound good.
He needs to get his own place.
Yeah, but he
needs a job first.
It's about time.
I need to buy him
a birthday present this week.
Do you have any ideas?
There's this Nintendo thing
he keeps on talking about and...
Rafi, let me
ask you something.
Do you like having sex?
Don't get Nintendo.
Are you coming to bed?
Yeah,
right after this game.
Just for a sec.
- Okay.
- What can it hurt?
- I've got to get back.
- We'll just look, all right?
- How much is this?
- Much too much. Don't look.
Don't even look.
- May I help you?
- What?
- May I...
- No.
- Jack.
- What?
- We have to go.
- Why?
I have an appointment
I forgot about.
I thought you said
you didn't...
I just have to go, all right?
- Why?
- Shit!
- Get down, get down.
- Why?
- It's a patient?
- No, it's my lover.
Yes, it's a patient.
Just be quiet.
- You're gonna have to explain this.
- You know I can't.
Okay. You're scaring
some of the customers.
Just dropped a contact.
I was married to a man
who couldn't love me.
And now I'm with someone
who can love me...
but he's not really a man.
At least, not all the time.
I can see that.
Maybe if I give myself
to him completely...
he'll step up
in the ways I need him to.
He said he knows
I'm not giving all of myself...
and it's unfair to us.
I don't think
I can do this anymore.
I'm sorry.
I just can't.
Do what?
We need to talk, Rafi.
Okay.
He's my son.
Who?
Why does it say Lisa Metzger
on your door?
Metzger is my maiden name.
You betrayed me.
Yes.
I did betray
your trust...
but I did it
to preserve our relationship.
That seemed
more important to me.
Is this what you call
preserving our relationship?
It seemed at the time
like the right thing to do.
What do you mean, at the time?
How long have you known?
Five weeks, four days.
I wanted to make sure
that it wasn't just a fling.
If it was, then we would have been able
to continue, but...
Now we're having
a conversation...
that will very likely end
our work together.
Can you see...
that I wanted to avoid
having this conversation...
for your benefit?
No. I think you did it
to control your son's life.
No. That's not true.
That is not true.
I stayed in it just for you,
no other reason.
I don't believe you.
That you could give me advice
to do as I please...
and then not do the same
for your son is wrong.
I think you need to
look at that.
Thank you. I am working on that
with my therapist right now.
You let me talk to you
about his penis.
Trust me, that was harder
for me than it was for you.
Up until a few weeks ago,
I didn't even think my son had a penis.
Do you realize your mother now knows
intimate details about your penis?
You told her
about my penis?
Jesus, Rafi.
Excuse me...
I thought it was safe
to assume it wouldn't get back to her.
She better not use that
to get me home for Thanksgiving.
- How can you make jokes?
- What else am I gonna do?
Get angry! Be outraged!
I am, okay?
I am angry.
I can't believe
she took it this far.
I'm just... I know that she cares about
the people she helps.
- And she cares a lot. I have to draw...
- What is wrong with you?
- the line there.
- You're delusional.
She's just trying to
control you. She still is.
Rafi, I'm not
arguing with you.
I know she tries to
control me. I hate it. I do.
But...
All I'm saying is,
she would never use you to do that.
You are so naive.
How could you deceive her like that?
That was totally unethical!
How dare you? I care far more
about her well-being than you do.
That's evident by your choice
in continuing to see her.
Mom.
What are you going to do now?
Live a life.
I hope you're making
the right decisions...
because you've got somebody else
counting on you now.
That's fine. I can handle it.
I love her.
Great. Just don't come to me,
help you clean up the mess.
I won't.
I mean, there won't be
a mess to clean up, Mom.
And I didn't buy you Q-Tips...
because I was trying to
protect your ears.
So what? She's just gonna
let you live there rent-free?
No, it ain't free.
I'm paying in other ways.
Oh, my God,
you're my hero.
No, it's not like that.
This whole thing with
my mother has just killed her.
She's, like, impossible
to live with these days.
This is it.
You wanna wait outside or...
No, I thought I'd stand next to you
with some paper towels.
I'll meet you
back at Rafi's.
I want you to
check out her place.
She's not going to be back
for a couple of hours.
Can't believe
you haven't made Page Six yet.
You know what?
This place is sick.
I know.
Now I understand
why you're taking all her shit.
That's not why.
I mean, I like living here,
but that's not the reason I'm with her.
Great apartment, friends with houses
in the Hamptons, art connections.
Those are good reasons, buddy.
You know what I mean?
- Shut up.
- What?
Come on, man, she's got you
tied up like it's Pelican Bay.
Seriously,
I barely even see you anymore.
I mean you even said it.
I'm only here right now
because she's not home.
Shit.
It's her. Come on.
You've got to hide.
Are you serious?
I really can't be here?
Yeah. No.
Get in the closet. In the closet.
In the closet?
Get in the closet.
She doesn't like people
in her living space.
Living space?
What the hell's living space?
- Is the kitchen part of it?
- Just get in the closet.
Jesus Christ.
What's up?
Hey. What are you
doing home already?
Oh, I'm sorry.
Would you like me to leave?
I thought you were hanging out
with Morris today.
Oh, yeah, drink that.
That's good stuff, huh?
I was. I mean, I am.
I mean, hanging out...
What's wrong with you?
You're acting weird.
Me? No, I'm fine.
You okay?
- Is there someone here?
- What? No.
Oh, my God, is there
someone here with you?
I'm allergic to...
- What is going on here?
- Okay, okay...
All right,
look.
We were only here for a few minutes.
Then I heard you coming...
and I panicked,
and I told him to hide.
- In the closet?
- I told him it was a bad idea.
Rafi, we were
only here just...
Long enough to have a beer with
your pie-throwing, sociopath friend?
Wait. Hey, hey.
No. Wait. I told him...
I told you not to come up,
but you forced me.
No, you did not.
You lie...
Wait, wait, wait.
Is that better or worse
than a psychopath?
What is wrong with you?
I can't believe
I have to come home to this.
People hiding in the closet,
you're lying.
You're a goddamn preschooler,
Dave!
You've had me on lockdown
since the minute I moved in here.
- What?
- Yeah.
You tell me you want me here and
then you treat me like an inmate.
An inmate?
I mean, you barely carry
your weight around here, Dave.
I do everything and
you can't even clean up the place.
I mean the one thing I ask of you...
is that you would tell me
when you bring someone here.
Rafi, this is not
such a big deal, okay?
You need to get over it.
I'm not Francis.
I'm not lying to you.
I'm not cheating on you.
- I'm definitely not avoiding you.
- Thanks.
That's reassuring and in really,
really good taste.
You know what?
I...
I can't do
this anymore.
You should get a dog
if you wanna give orders...
'cause I really don't
give a shit anymore!
Let's go.
I missed you like crazy.
I think we need to take a break, Dave,
and start seeing other people.
What?
I can't do this.
This just isn't right for me...
and I can't
trust you anymore.
I was only showing him
your place for a minute. I just...
It's not just that.
You're in no place
to give me what I need.
I get that.
And then this whole thing
with your mother...
I don't even know
what to say about that.
It's crazy.
But just think the reason
she stopped seeing you...
is because she believes
that we're in love.
It's just...
It's just not gonna work out.
At least, not now.
So that's it?
Rafi.
You don't look as relieved
as you predicted.
Are you kidding?
I'm devastated.
I hurt my patient so that
she could have a relationship with my son.
And so what happens?
My son
hurts my patient.
And now...
my patient hurts my son.
I'm totally confused
about my part in this.
I think you did
the right thing, Lisa.
You know,
even love won't guarantee...
that they're not going to
hurt one another.
If anything,
it just makes it a likelihood.
Thanks for coming down.
Sorry the place
is such a mess.
Rafi thought I'd like your work and
I trust her judgment.
Yeah, well,
we broke up.
I'm sorry.
I didn't know.
- She didn't say anything about it?
- No.
These are great.
Do you have a gallery?
No.
How much for
the larger pieces?
I don't know.
I never sold one before.
I'll give you $1,000 each
for these two.
And I'll see what I can do
about getting you a show.
Done.
I don't believe it.
You're gonna be a huge painter
and I get to go along for the ride.
Maybe I can write this whole
pie thing off as performance art.
What do you think?
- Who you calling?
- Rafi.
- Why?
- I want to tell her how it went.
Plus I want to kick her a few bucks
for the time I spent there.
- She'll appreciate it.
- What am I, chopped liver?
I'm gonna pretend you didn't
say that. You're the reason...
- All right, all right.
- I'm not in right now.
Does this mean
you're gonna get your own place now?
- Shut up.
- Thanks.
Hey, Raff,
it's me again. Listen...
I have some amazing news
for you. Please pick up.
Rafi, Rafi.
Hello?
Why don't you call him, then?
I like it, man.
It's very The Early Years, you know?
A little roach problem,
but you can fix that.
It's gonna look good
when A&E comes to shoot
the documentary.
He lived on
rugalach and macaroons...
for the first four years
during his Blue Period...
- Would you shut up?
- ...and then moved on to the Louvre.
All right, Howard Hughes.
Tell me to shut up again.
Come on. Get dressed. Let's go.
Let's get it moving around.
I wanna go out.
I want you to look nice.
You know you've been shut in too long.
Let's go. Pick it up.
We're with her.
No, you're not.
What? Come on, man,
that's my girlfriend right there.
Back off the rope.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Hold the goddamn mayo.
You know that chick?
- Yeah. Don't point.
- Sorry.
What's wrong?
We can't get in.
Hey, it's okay.
Come on. Let them in.
Hey. I love you, okay?
I really do.
But if you don't take
advantage of this situation...
I'm gonna seriously
question your manhood.
I miss her.
Get over it, okay?
It's been
two weeks.
You don't think she's out here
doing the same thing?
I'm thinking
the pan-seared trout.
What about the salmon?
Looks good, too.
Do you think it's wild
or farm-raised?
- Do you like carp?
- No.
I wanna dance.
Go get to work,
sister.
Come on, shake it
like a salt shaker. Go ahead.
What is that?
What is that? No, no.
That's like some Irene Cara shit.
She ought to be wearing leg warmers.
All right,
you gotta do damage control.
- Yeah. This is not helping anybody.
- Go.
Have a drink, baby.
Feel better?
Much.
Yes!
I'm going to use
your toothbrush.
That's okay, right?
Oh, my God.
What?
Dave.
- Yeah.
- Do you believe in Jesus Christ?
You're painting.
I'm working.
I'm not doing this
to piss you off, Mom.
This is not
an act of rebellion.
I love her.
I'm trying to make it work.
I could really
use your help.
My help. Have you even
heard a word I've said?
I am out of this.
Just let me bring her over
Friday night.
Please. Mom,
I'm begging you.
She doesn't stop
talking about you.
How much she misses you
and all this stuff.
Are you insane?
There is no way.
You okay?
Mom? We're here.
Rafi.
What?
What is it, sweetie?
I missed you.
Now I just realized
how much.
I missed you, too.
- Did you?
- Yes.
- Hello, sweetheart.
- Hi, Mom. Thank you.
- You look very nice.
- Okay.
Coats.
What? Oh, yeah.
- Jack.
- Ma, can Audrey come over?
- No, no, no. Get off the phone.
- Would you get off the phone?
All right, Dad,
this is Rafi.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Nice to meet you.
- Very nice to meet you.
- This is my sister. D.
- Hi. Dinah.
- Hi.
- I like your dress.
- I heard so much about you.
- Yeah?
- Hi, I'm Blanche.
- She's my mother.
- And you are?
- Rafi.
- Rafi. What a nice name.
- Thank you.
It's for Raphael,
actually.
Just like the painter.
- Painter?
- My husband, Sam.
- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- Hi, Sam. Nice to meet you.
Watch out for him.
That's the truth.
- Hope you're hungry.
- Yeah.
Oh, my... You shouldn't have.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
What a cute bag.
It's a nice bottle, too.
Look at that.
If it gets cold enough,
we can drink it with dinner.
- Mom.
- Absolutely.
Put it in the freezer
for 10 minutes.
It'll be fine.
Thank you.
God bless my daughter.
I honestly don't know
where I'd be without her.
In Brooklyn, Sam.
You'd be in Brooklyn.
This is you next to me.
- This is beautiful.
- You okay, Grandma?
Like I have a choice?
You're okay till you collapse.
I have to tell you
a wonderful story.
First time
I met my Blanche.
In the subway.
There used to be an elevated line
that ran across De Kalb Avenue.
I was on
one side of the car...
she was on
the other side of the car.
And she is wearing the dopiest hat
you ever saw in your life.
She looked terrific.
I feel like I've heard
this story once before.
Only once?
You're lucky.
It's an adorable story.
I like this.
How great is it
that David sold his paintings?
Yes, we're
so happy for him.
- Yeah, right.
- What?
I never thought
you had a chance in hell.
There you go.
- Oh, Dad, really.
- Anyway, you should...
You should all know that
this is what I'm gonna be doing...
for the rest of my life.
Really?
No CPA. No law degree.
No, "Paging Dr. Bloomberg,"
Dad. This is it.
I suppose you can make
a living out of it.
So, I understand you're interested
in converting to Judaism.
Oh, my God.
- Good, thank you.
- Sure.
- Does this go in here?
- Yes.
- Okay, good.
- That's good.
- This is very strange.
- Yes, it is...I would say, yeah.
Certainly never experienced anything
even remotely like it.
So now you've seen that even
your therapist has a crazy family.
Are you kidding?
This is what I never had.
You know, no grandparents.
No laughter around the dinner table.
No dinner, actually.
Thank you
for having me over.
I know this was
very difficult for you.
No, it wasn't
difficult at all.
I think
you're great, Rafi.
I think you're great.
I know this is hard for you to understand,
but this isn't personal.
I just don't want my son giving up
on his faith so early.
But he
wouldn't have to.
I would want my kids to have
a religious upbringing.
You know I didn't have one.
You always said I suffered from it.
Slow down. You...
Kids? With my son?
Rafi, think about
what you're saying.
I'm sorry.
Sometimes I forget
that you're his mother.
I still think of you
as my therapist.
What a mess, huh?
You know what else?
He had, like, 20 boxes
of Q-Tips in his bathroom.
Meanwhile, the rest of
the place is a complete dump.
Wait a minute.
This is Dave you're talking about?
Rafi's Dave?
Yeah? So what?
They're broken up.
Listen to me, Sue.
Rafi and Dave are back together now.
Okay, so they're back together.
What's the big deal?
The big deal is,
it would kill her.
Okay. Jesus,
I won't say anything.
You won't say
anything about what?
Hey.
Did you sleep with Sue?
What?
You know what?
Just call her already and go back to
your own place, please.
I need quiet time. Thank you.
No, I'm not going to call her.
This is crazy.
She tells me
to see other people...
and then she punishes me
for taking her advice?
Screw that.
You know what? Come on.
Even I can see that
it's not that you went out.
It's who
you went out with.
It's, like,
Learn Your Fucking Lesson Day around here.
Jesus Christ.
Lock the door, please.
Thank you.
Magnolia. Traitors.
You have my total support
in whatever you want to do.
Then why do I feel like
you're still against this?
I'm not. I am worried.
I'm your mother.
That's my job.
What if I decide
to go through with this?
Sweetheart, you clearly have
something special, you two.
I look at this relationship
and I think what it's done for you.
It's really...
It's great.
You are...I mean,
you've come into your own.
You're a painter.
I get that.
Rafi made me
see that.
That is going to be
your life.
- That's right.
- That's right. That's great.
But, David,
you have to try to hear this.
Love is not
always enough.
Not when you're talking about
marriage and children...
and joint checking accounts.
You're not supposed
to learn this lesson at 23, maybe...
but you did get yourself
into a complicated situation.
Mom.
Relationships are work.
Children...
are work.
And I'm not saying
love isn't important. It is, but...
- So what are you saying?
- I'm saying that...
Sometimes
you love and you learn.
And you...
move on.
And that's okay.
Here we go.
Whoops.
I'm sorry.
And?
And it was a really...
really bad call
and I wasn't thinking.
I'm so sorry, Rafi.
I'm just...
learning this stuff as I go along,
but you gotta work with me here...
because...
Can we
get a minute here?
No way.
I work here.
Fine. I'm going anyway.
Look.
Rafi, we might have some things
working against us...
and I do screw up from time to time,
but so does everybody else.
The difference with me
is I am actively...
I'm trying so hard
to get it right.
And I wanna be the man
that you see in me every so often.
Okay, on leap years, fine.
But I wanna be that guy for you.
Bottom line is...
I love you so much.
I'll figure it out,
okay?
I'll get it. You just gotta
give me a chance.
- Are you sure about this?
- Yeah, I'm sure.
Why now?
'Cause you want this
more than anything in the world.
And I wanna
give it to you.
I wanna make
a baby with you.
I can't.
Why?
Because I love you
and I can't do this to you.
I don't understand.
What are you doing to me?
It actually
feels really good.
I just can't.
I wanna
give this to you.
I know you do.
And it's the sweetest gift
anyone's ever given me.
But it's not
right for you.
You'll regret it.
You know this.
The fact that
you're still willing...
just shows how deep
your love goes.
That's the gift
I'm taking from you.
So I think I only need to sell
one more painting...
then I'll have enough
to get out of here.
What?
Where you gonna go?
I was thinking about somewhere
in Central America. Maybe El Salvador.
You're just gonna pick up
and go to El Salvador?
- Yeah.
- I don't understand.
You get there, you get off the plane.
How do you know where to go?
I don't.
I'm going to figure it out.
It's time for me
to try something like this.
I've never even left
the country before.
Excuse me.
What about Class Trip '98?
- What, Niagara Falls?
- Yeah.
- Come on, Morris.
- What?
- Well, man, what am I gonna do?
- You should come with me.
- No. El Salvador?
- Yeah.
That's Noriega country, amigo.
I'm gonna pass on that.
No, that's Panama,
and you might learn something.
I'm learning
right here.
I went on a second date
with this girl the other night.
You're kidding me.
Yes, I am. But I had you
for a second, didn't I? I had you.
- Oh, shit.
- What?
- I forgot my hat at the restaurant.
- Oh, you schmuck.
- You want me to come with you?
- No, that's cool, I'll get it.
All right, man.
I love you, brother.
- I'll catch up with you.
- All right, man.
- You forgot your hat.
- Yeah.
There you go.
Thank you.
Subtitle modified by Deborah Su